InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ YinYang ❯ Reflections ( Chapter 4 )

A/N: The fourth chapter (angels sing in background). I like this rewrite the best out of all of them. Enjoy!

 

Reminder: Inuyasha + silver platter = daydream.

 

Remember: E-mails and reviews most welcome.

 

Chapter Four: Reflections

 

Whenever one is lost, the most common advice is to stay where you are and help will come to you. However, that concept never sat well with Inuyasha. His chaotic childhood had taught him that if you stayed still long enough, bad things could happen. So anytime he felt lost, confused, or threatened about something, Inuyasha ran. A quick sprint through the wilderness always helped him find his way through the muddled mess his thoughts sometimes resembled. There was just something about the way the wind rushed past his ears that helped bring everything into a streamline focus for him. Not to mention that running was a highly effective defense mechanism, but everyone already knew that.

 

Darting around, through, and over the trees that made up his forest, Inuyasha began to make some sense of his jumbled brain. The surfacing memories of his mother and how his life had crashed downhill after her death managed to bring bitter tears to the corners of his eyes, but fortunately he could blame that on the stinging wind that was slapping his face. The more difficult and pressing questions of why Ofukuro would hide something as significant as another sibling, especially a full sister, shoved the memories aside and raged to the fore of his mind. `Damn it, Ofukuro. Why couldn't you have told me? Didn't I deserve to know?' Since his anger was hot enough to disrupt his run, he decided to pick a fight with the next tree that dared to cross his path in order to relieve some of the tension.

 

“Sankon-Tessou!” he roared, his steel hard claws rending the defenseless tree into firewood. He turned to the next. And the next.

 

Finally, after having knocked down enough trees to keep Kaede's whole village, and maybe the two neighboring ones, warm for the next three winters, Inuyasha collapsed to his knees. “Why?” He slammed his fist into the soft earth. “Why?” He repeated the gesture. “WHY?!“ Both hands this time. “Why did you have to DIE?!“ Flopping back to lean against one of the few remaining trees, Inuyasha studied his now bloodied knuckles, as fragments of wood and foliage floated haphazardly through the air.

 

`Guess it's a little late to ask Ofukuro that now, huh?` He chuckled bitterly to himself as he started to lick his wounds. It had been a long time since he had lost control over something that had happened so long ago. `Can't change the past,' he thought sullenly.

 

He placed his arms across his raised knees and watched the torn skin knit its self back together. Inuyasha couldn't help but make the comparison between physical healing and emotional scarring. `If I sliced the skin after it's healed, blood will still rise to the surface.' He shook his head vigorously to rid himself of such morbid thoughts. `I haven't thought like this in ages. What's wrong with me?'

 

This brought his mind to the reason, or rather the person, who had erased those gruesome thoughts to begin with.

 

Kagome.

 

Inuyasha had yet to pinpoint exactly how he felt about that girl. She was infuriating and, yet, at the same time, she soothed his soul. He didn't trust anybody like he trusted Kagome. She was his best friend and his worst enemy (in a good way). There was no one who could make him smile like she could. And nobody made him feel as terrified as she did. His worst fear was that Kagome would be gone one day, in spite of all of her reassurances that she would stay by his side. It didn't matter how she might leave, by choice or by death, it still distressed him no end. Therefore, it was always a relief that Kagome was still sleeping in that strange traveling futon of hers or popping out of the bone-eater`s well into his era. This was why he tried to prevent her from going home. Sure, at first it had been about the Jewel, but now it was about Kagome. Even her 'Osuwari' commands were more of a blessing than a curse. It meant that Inuyasha had one more reason to be connected to the futuristic miko.

 

But the biggest problem in dealing with his feelings for Kagome was Kikyo. In the very beginning there had been enough of a resemblance to confuse a newly awoken hanyou, but after catching Kagome's scent once, there was no mistaking the differences between the two women. Not only were their scents completely different, but so were their personalities. Kikyo had always managed to remain calm and aloof in almost any situation or danger. She had worn a mask to hide the true woman under the priestess. Kagome showed a passion that Inuyasha had never witnessed in any woman before. She could become excited about the slightest detail then turn around to stare down his bastard of a half-brother, Sesshoumaru. Kikyo and Kagome were as different as night and day. Or maybe a better comparison would be two sides of the same coin. Their personalities were just facets of the same soul after all. Kikyo could've been like Kagome, if not for the burden of the Jewel.

 

He had to shake his head again, silver hair flying. `Gah, why am I thinking like this?' He pushed himself into a crouch and surveyed his surroundings. He was surprised to see the Goshinboku not twenty feet away. `I didn't think I'd gone this way.' Inuyasha shrugged to himself and stood up. Stretching a bit relaxed the hanyou and he made his way to the sacred tree.

 

He approached the tree and placed the palm of his hand on the worn away spot where he had been pinned by Kikyo's arrow. He was still amazed, and not to mention pissed as all hell, whenever he thought of the events that had led to his fifty-year nap. `Where did it all go wrong?' was the question of the year.

 

It would be so easy to blame every little thing that had happened to Kikyo and him on Naraku and Onigumo. After all it was Onigumo's desire for Kikyo that led to Naraku being formed and everything just went to Hell in a hand basket from there. Kikyo's death, Miroku's kazaana, and Sango's slaughtered village all stemmed from Onigumo and Naraku. Shockingly though, Inuyasha found that he couldn't lay all of the blame at Naraku's feet. Not to be mistaken, that bastard had done more then his fair share of damage and he had used several non-related events to his own advantage, but not everything was his fault.

 

`Yeah. That bastard didn't raise me to be so mistrusting of people or make Kikyo the guardian of that damned Jewel.' Inuyasha sighed as he plopped himself down at the foot of the enormous tree to ponder his dilemmas.

 

So, who was to blame for all of the crap that Inuyasha and his friends went through almost every single day? `Maybe it goes farther then just Kikyo and me. If the Shikon jewel hadn't been created or if those stupid demons had just left Midoriko alone or if she hadn't pushed her soul out of her body, none of this would`ve happened. Then again, Midoriko and the demons can't be blamed either. They just did what they had to do to survive. Damn! I seem to be thinking in circles.'

 

Than he was hit by a revelation.

 

`If none of that crap had happened, Kagome would never have come to this time.'

 

If Kagome hadn`t traveled through time, than Inuyasha would never have been released. This also meant that Kikyo wouldn't have been brought back to life by a Jewel greedy witch. And thus no romantic angst.

 

Inuyasha smacked his head against the tree trunk. “Kikyo is dead, no matter how much it hurts to admit it. Her resurrection was a mistake.” Saying it out loud gave the statement a more solid feel than if he'd just thought it. He stared up into the branches above him. The swaying boughs were hypnotizing and lulling him back into his prior musings on what-ifs and wouldn'ts.

 

`Although without her, Naraku`s deception wouldn`t have been discovered. Chock up another point for Fate.'

 

“Damn it!” Growling, he pounded his fist into his own leg. “To think, all the crap everyone's had to put up with can be considered necessary in the grand scheme of things. What a bitch.”

 

Now Fate had thrown something completely out of the blue at him. `A sister. How the hell do I have a sister?' He tried to recall all the conversations that he'd ever had with his mother. 'You'd think that Ofukuro would have mentioned it, if I'd had any other siblings. I mean, she told me about Sesshoumaru or at least, as much as she knew of him. I never got the feeling that he was around much back then.'

 

He snorted softly. “Of course he wasn't around. Stupid, full-demon son of a …” His mutterings petered out as his mind turned to the image of his supposed sister. `She sorta looks like Ofukuro. Wait a minute…' Than he realized why the name had sounded so familiar. Izayoi was the name of his-, their-, whoever's, mother.

 

`That doesn't prove anything though. It could be coincidence.' He stopped himself, than chuckled at his own in-joke. `Thanks a lot, Fate. But there are still too many questions. I guess I'll just have to go ask.'

 

Determined to get to the truth behind this new twist of Fate's, Inuyasha got to his feet and rushed off in search of his answers.

 

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