Kingdom Hearts Fan Fiction ❯ Alkalinity ❯ Barium ( Chapter 5 )

A/N: Not only has this fic taken the place of my homework, I spent nearly eight hours today twitching and fidgeting because I didn't want to sit in class, I wanted to be writing. I managed to write a couple of pages in English, but I work best at my computer. Wikipedia is my friend, and high school is the enemy.

 

 

I tried to be clear in the last chapter, but Richard Coeur de Lion (who was real, mind you) was Axel. As you fall deeper into this little world of mine (and I'm falling with you) the incarnations will be less and less concrete - names and faces will change. Just remember that the two main forces in each dream will always be Roxas and Axel. I just couldn't call him Axel when his name was already Richard, ne?

 

 

If you're a geek like me and now curious about the Lionheart, more is here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_I_of_England

 

 

I want to write a different summary for this story that better represents the story as a whole. If you have any ideas, suggestions, or (best of all) if you have an entire summary off the top of your head for me, please let me know.

 

 

Disclaimer: Roses are red, violets are blue; me no own, so you no sue!

 

 

x(X)x

 

 

“Maybe this man, who didn't believe in love, realized by the time his hair was white that in his heart was something which could be called love.”

 

- Zhang Jie “Love Must Not Be Forgotten”

 

 

x(X)x

 

 

Roxas was happily escaping to lilting songs in broken languages when Namine jerked his headphones away and indicated in loose, irritated gestures that someone was knocking at his door. Now that his source of soothing oblivion was diverted, he did register a staccato beat drifting through his sanctuary.

 

 

He found Axel at his door, narrow-eyed and breathing heavily. Roxas' intentions must have shown in his eyes, because long fingers caught the door even as he sought to slam it.

 

 

Lanky limbs and flashing eyes slipped through the gap in a rush of warm air. Axel leaned against the closed door and his head fell back in the boneless, tired motion of a puppet with cut strings.

 

 

His glassy eyes were shuttered, but it lent him no illusion of serenity. Roxas saw him as a quivering figure of wire stretched to breaking. Without moving, his tension radiated outward in stinging waves. Roxas felt them skitter over his skin like sparks.

 

 

He stepped away from the too-still figure in his doorway and collided with Namine, who was standing behind him and glaring at Axel with enough heat to burn the flesh from his bones.

 

 

He heard Namine yelling, heard it rise in pitch to a vengeful female keen.

 

 

He heard Axel shouting and murmuring helplessly in turns.

 

 

He excavated a deep grave in his mind. He placed himself inside it and covered himself in cool, black soil until the words could not reach him.

 

 

In the world that people other than Roxas could see, he assumed the ever-reliable fetal position on the lush carpet that was currently bearing witness to the debacle and began silently cataloguing the creatures of the fanciful environment embroidered therein.

 

 

It required no thought, only dull concentration. It was a blessed relief, even though he had never particularly liked ducks.

 

 

He couldn't quite not-see when the music instructor, Demyx, barged in and dragged Axel out.

 

 

He couldn't quite not hear when Axel screamed his name.

 

 

x(X)x

 

 

They began absenting themselves from other classes, until the only human contact necessary was Kairi, the too-sweet girl who collected their homework from their teachers and dropped it off in the evenings. Neither had any positive inclination towards the homework itself, but Roxas welcomed it as a source of mindless occupation to keep him from falling asleep. And whatever Roxas did, Namine would do with him.

 

 

Kairi would come back for their work the morning it was due, and Roxas never missed the extra warmth in his sister's smile as she handed the burden off. He snarled at the girl whenever possible, willing to rip her apart if it meant holding on to the only person who was keeping the pieces of his mind from scattering in all directions.

 

 

He broke glasses to supply himself with shards, and bled himself into bowls so Namine could paint sweeter dreams onto his skin.

 

 

Namine cut away another hank of her hair each day to burn as dreadful, cloying incense. They did not know what they were mourning.

 

 

It had finally occurred to him to ask Namine, in questions of vague shadow, if she herself had walked terrifying roads in her dreams. She said she had not dreamed at all since their coming.

 

 

She said she was sorry for not being able to lessen his pain.

 

 

“If it were a matter of lessening the pain, I wouldn't be breathing. But if dying means eternal rest, it might mean eternal dreams.”

 

 

A few hours later he fell too deeply, and Namine was not able to rouse him.

 

 

x(X)x

 

 

In the balmy night air, he shivered.

 

 

The mud-brick walls seemed to close in about him, and all he could hear was the chattering of rats and the rustle of wind through trees.

 

 

Then low voices cut through his terror. First the guards, slurred from drink they should not have had. Then another voice, smoother and tasting more of aguamiel - honey water - than the guards' bitter cocoa xocolatl.

 

 

He sat up straight, heedless of the rough wall that scraped his bare back, and held his breath.

 

 

After a few short - they lasted forever - moments of discussion, the doorway was darkened by a wiry figure. Lit from behind by torchlight, the face could not be seen.

 

 

Roxas didn't have to see his face.

 

 

He tried to stand, but they had broken his leg when he tried to run. Hot hands caught him before he could fall, and held him so close he could hear the unsteady beating of another heart.

 

 

He said he was sorry.

 

 

Roxas kissed him before he could say it again.

 

 

He felt scalding tears trickling down his neck as the priest took him, felt the shaking in the powerful frame over his. When Roxas kissed him, he tasted the bitterness of regret on the lips that had loved him for so long.

 

 

With his face pressed against Axoloa's neck, he told him not to be sorry. And kissed him again. Because he loved the man who was going to kill him in the morning.

 

 

The moon set.

 

 

The sun rose.

 

 

They painted him in blue chalk, and brought him to wait in line at the base of the pyramid. It took hours to reach the top, and the steps were wet with the blood of those who had gone before him.

 

 

Axoloa's obsidian knife dripped onto the stone, and there was no hope in his eyes.

 

 

Some required attendants to restrain them, but Roxas walked to the stone table and arranged himself.

 

 

The priest closed his eyes with shaking fingers, unwittingly smearing blood over the lids. He felt tear-drunk lips on his just before the knife tore into his stomach.

 

 

A hand that held him and caressed him pushed up through his organs. He felt it close around his heart.

 

 

It was fitting. He had surrendered his heart long before.

 

 

Through the chanting, he could hear a desperate voice.

 

 

“Forgive me.”

 

 

x(X)x

 

 

He woke screaming.

 

 

x(X)x

 

 

A/N: Again, I am SO sorry for the shortness. I just can't stand to extend a chapter for no particular reason when it's telling me quite clearly that it's finished. But at least the updates are coming quickly, ne?

 

 

And how about that “Axoloa”? It's a real Aztec name that I found when I went digging. Because I have truly amazing luck.

 

 

Leijhana tu'sai to all readers and reviewers!