Kingdom Hearts Fan Fiction ❯ Dance With Me ❯ One-Shot

Dance forMe

Seifer/Hayner

Many thanks to my wonderful beta LifesLover after seeing such a daunting word count. Thanks darlin'

 

Seifer POV:

Okay, let me explain why I am currently propped up with my back against this particular wall, eavesdropping on the conversation that's happening just around the corner. Said conversation is occurring between a) one of the only two people who claims to like me; you could almost say she actually cared, and b) my current blond obsession - whom I have been trying desperately to pursue as quietly as I could for the past six months, although that's not going according to plan at all, after not having seen him in almost 2 years.

I could feel myself slowly fuming at what my supposed friend was telling the blond about my life, past and present; everything I don't want anyone to know about, along with a few choice expletives thrown in for good measure. I'm not really sure whether she was chastising him, from her colourful use of language, or attempting to explain something to him considering the sheer number of curses she was throwing at him.

I slowly breathe in and out: deep, calming breaths. My temper was simmering just under the surface, but one of the few talents I had was remaining outwardly calm when I chose, on the surface anyway. I know I probably have that pissed-off-to-the-nines glint in my icy blue eyes; people have a habit of running from me when I get like this.

I pushed off from the wall with my left foot, which had been pulled up against it in its customary position. I tug my black beanie more firmly onto my head, covering my pale blond hair and the scar running across the bridge of my nose; which I know he finds offensive for some reason, or maybe that's just my face.

Settling my signature scowl onto my features, I turn the corner to watch an extremely pissed off Fuu, backed up by a silently looming Rai, pinning a more-than-distressed-looking blond who was over a foot taller than her against the wall with her index finger right under his nose. His deep umber eyes fixated on the steadily moving finger as though she had been jabbing at him with it using it like an epee.

It has to be said that, for a girl of her size, she could be highly intimidating; I guess being backed up by Rai helped quite a bit. I absorbed the scene for just a few moments, enjoying in my own sadistic way the fear rolling out from her hostage: he usually wouldn't be caught so easily and very rarely let anyone talk this that way at him without any retort. But then I had missed the beginning of this - delightful - conversation. I could hear the sarcasm dripping from that thought.

But my idling can only last so long; turning my gaze on Fuu and Rai, glaring, I let out a low growl trying my damndest to ignore the blond as I really didn't want to see the look on his face right now. Much as I enjoyed watching his expressions, there were a few that I never wanted to see. I don't want anyone's pity - especially his.

“Fuujin... don't you think you've said enough?” I couldn't disguise the anger that literally dripped from my voice as I spoke, making my voice sound far deeper than it actually was, rumbling just like the growl I had already loosed. She would know how angry I was by the simple use of her full name, if not the way I had spoken. Not to mention the pointed glare aimed in her direction, and hopefully she wouldn't push me any further.

They all turned as one to look at me and Fuu's cheeks flushed lightly with what I can only assume was embarrassment and hopefully some degree of shame, shifting her own gaze to the ground. I watched as Rai moved behind the lilac-haired girl and tucked an arm around her body from behind, looping over her shoulder to grasp around her waist, sheltering her with his body. I could sense Rai's stare as he trained his eyes on mine, searching for something that, by the look of things, as he turned his eyes away to look down at the girl in his arms, he'd found.

“But Seifer...,” Fuu started to speak again and I returned my stare to her face and she went silent.

"Enough.” The word was curt and to the point and would hopefully put an end to the discussion.

Fuu's shoulders slumped and she pressed further back into Rai, something she had taken to doing of late. She laced their fingers together, and taking one last glance between me and the blond still pressed against the wall, I could see the distress clearly revealed in those usually focused eyes, she backed up quietly and turned, pulling Rai along with her. `Later, Seifer.'

`Wise decision.' I didn't say anything else after that and I allowed them both to walk away as I really didn't want to start yelling at them, especially with him still here. Whether I liked it or not, they were trying to help me. Although they were more of a hindrance than a help with the constant pushes and shoves I had received when they were least expected.

I had incurred my fair share of bruises and two split lips, which the last of was still healing, courtesy of the guy standing before me: most of those were when I had been trying to stop myself from accidentally hurting him when I had been pushed, shoved or otherwise manoeuvred, without my consent, by well-meaning friends.

I would try later, when my temper had levelled out some, to explain to them that the effort was pointless, for the hundredth time. I had given up. Unlike some people, I knew when I was fighting a losing battle; I can't help but think that I may have come at this from the wrong direction to begin with. This would be one of the few occasions where I would back down before I damaged what was left of my pride, battered though it was at this point.

Turning slowly, I looked up at the blond pressed against the wall, noticing him worrying his lower lip with his teeth, eyes cast to the ground, unfocused. But I avoided making direct eye contact, turning my gaze from his face, taking in his clothes after a swift glance, low slung green combats and dark t-shirt, typical sneakers same old lamer.

My eyes drifted to look past his somewhat prone form; I couldn't bear to see the look he would direct at me after learning a few of my home truths: they weren't really bad or nothin', but they were mine to tell.

My heart squeezed inside my chest as I refused the desperate need to look at his face again. He has such a beautiful face, slender, smooth peachy skin, chocolate brown eyes framed by delicate blond lashes and soft pouting lips.

I glanced away and continued to turn the rest of my body to follow, heading back the way I had come, throwing back over my shoulder, “Get gone chicken-wuss: it would seem that it's your lucky day.” My voice had finally levelled out and was no longer such a deep resonating sound. My temper slowly dissipated in his presence - I just can't seem to stay angry the way I used to, especially around him.

I caught his quietly whispered exclamation in that sweetly lilting voice, whispering my name instead of his usual bastard. What I wouldn't give to make him cry out my name in ecstasy or have it whimper in need - I know he'd sound as sexy as hell doing that with his beautiful voice.

“Seifer?” I glanced back just once, ice blue locking with burnt umber orbs and I can't really say what was expressed in those rich brown eyes, but right then I didn't want to know. I don't think my heart could take it. I could already feel my breath hitch as my heart jumped at even that small visual contact.

I barely nodded my head, turning my eyes away, as I reached up to the lip of my beanie and tugged it down further, covering the scar on the bridge of my nose more. Watching his eyes flicker to it and then looking away, seeing a slight pink hue flush his cheeks. I wonder what that was about. No, forget about it: it's not your business now.

I turned my head back to face front and kept on walking. I'd been rebuffed quite enough, thanks. It had been almost six months since I had met him again and yet, no matter what I tried, nothing seemed to work and my so-called friends weren't of any assistance.

They were making me out to be some sort of pervert who was doing nothing but “accidently” falling on the object of his perverted affections. Granted, I wouldn't know what to do about it on my own: I had been going for something more subtle. I wanted to be friends first and all that, an attempt to get past the history between us, back to better days. But foolish me - that never works. Right?

I like him a lot, even after all this time. It wasn't just animalistic lust, even though he had caused that kind of reaction in my body the first time I'd seen him again. Can you blame me? He looked truly mouth watering, body lilting and swaying to the music as the coloured lights filtered across his skin. I shook my head against the very vivid memory- it was stirring heat low in my belly.

It had been my need to be near him that was the driving force behind all this madness. I should have known better. I wanted to be the reason that he was smiling. I hadn't recognised the feelings I'd had when I was younger, but damn did they cause problems now. We've been separated for two years now, I know that's my fault but I hadn't realized the torment that it would cause me. I didn't even think we'd ever see each other again after that, having no idea what his plans had been other than to finish school.

In those two years I finally realised some things about myself: I find men attractive- no correction, I had found him attractive, that, and the only two people I can really rely on besides myself are Rai and Fuu. Everyone else - well, they could go to hell - him, too. He stirred something deep and primal inside my body; something I hadn't been ready to acknowledge at the time

`Stupid chicken-wuss.' It was meant to come out angry, but it had come out wistful instead; I wanted him more than I wanted to admit. What had once been a derogatory term for him had become a term of endearment to me. I guess I really was screwed: I'd fallen for a guy who had been hating me for the past 15 years and, if that wasn't bad enough, I'd been beating the crap out of him regularly for most of those.

I can't even remember why we ended up like this, I know that it has something to do with his brother, Zell, and the arguments we'd had back then. I remember the lamer walking up to me when we were just 5 and 7, confronting me face-to-face and telling me, `I hate you, Seifer Almasy.' But he never told me why and we've been- I suppose enemies is the most accurate term- ever since.

I proceeded to walk off the campus heading to my favourite thinking spot, when I wasn't in the mood for a physical release in the form of a struggle match, Sunset Hill. It was far away from everything else in town and pretty damn quiet at this time of day. I didn't feel like going to lectures anymore even though I knew I should. I'd worked damn hard for it and it all seemed to be unravelling at an alarming rate, and now, I just couldn't seem to care.

My mind was tumbling over snippets of memory from my childhood, images of a small blond boy with huge, rich coffee-coloured eyes staring up at me, fresh tears leaking down his cheeks, lip trembling and trying desperately hard to be brave and not wince. It had brought a soft smile to my lips that was very rarely, if ever, seen as I had cleaned his grazed knee.

I remember on another occasion, later that summer, having him looking down at me from my back as I had given him a piggy-back home after he'd gotten lost again. I strode purposefully away from the campus grounds, deep in thought, letting my feet guide me to the place where we used to sit together and I realized just how much I had let slip through my fingers all those years ago.

I had no plans other than lazing about and remembering some of our better memories, old and new, trying to figure out if I really could give him up. `Hayner Dincht - you really are an idiot. But, I guess, no more than me.'

 

Hayner POV:

I watched as his beanie covered head disappeared around the corner once again, trying to figure out if I had ever seen his hair from underneath that horrid hat. Stifling the quiet groan of confusion and frustration that had been trying to get out ever since he'd arrived to see Rai and Fuu trying to - I'm not quite sure what they were doing, to be honest. Interrogate or possibly entrust me with a few truths I hadn't known anything about. Private things that Seifer never would have told me otherwise - and that really hurt inside, even taking into account that we weren't on the best of terms and hadn't been for a long time. Not that I'd ever tell him that.

I've never seen him look so intently at anyone before. It made my body shiver; I'm not quite sure why but it felt like anticipation. But he never even looked at me, not once, until the very last minute and even then he didn't look me in the eye but looked right past me. That hurt, too - my stomach felt like it was being twisted in knots - my heart lodged in my throat.

I had said his name, but had stuttered at getting it past the blockage, just to get him to look at me, I wanted to see those startlingly blue eyes, but when he did, those same eyes looked unbelievably sad. It made my heart ache; I've never seen such a defeated expression on his usually stubborn features. This was Seifer, undefeated, fight to the death; what happened to him?

Could it really be true that I'd been wrong about him for all this time? Why won't he look at me?

We've been fighting and arguing with each other for years but I've never seen that look on his face before. And that bastard had been letting me believe all this bullshit for years? He never even tried to defend himself against the accusations, thoughts and fists that I and others had hurled at him. Why would he do that, just to make a reputation for himself or was there something deeper?

I'd known I never won, of course, but that doesn't matter, we'd fought tooth and nail.

I slowly slid down the wall, t-shirt bunching exposing my skin to the prickly wall, back resting against the sturdy surface, as my knees trembled on the verge of giving out. There was just far too much information running through my head and I couldn't process it fast enough.

You know people say there are those moments in your life where your whole world shifts and you struggle to comprehend the changes that have been made? Well, my whole life just took a really confusing dizzy spell and I'm not sure what's up from down right now.

Seifer had been my enemy for as long as I can remember, having him toying around with me and feeling like this about him, I'm not really sure what to believe anymore. Was he really just toying with me or was he as nervous around me as I am around him? I mean, he was being really touchy feely and, dare I say it, clumsy; falling over on to me all the time.

I hadn't realized how much I would miss him being there until he was gone. I can't comprehend what my life would be like without him in it - not again. We spent so much time together; for whatever reason. The fact that he suddenly disappeared, it made me see that maybe what I had found in our highly screwed up relationship wasn't quite the violent, head bashing, craziness that I had thought it was. It was something completely the opposite. They did say that the line between love and hate was very thin.

I actually cared about the idiot and he never even noticed, but then I don't think he realised what this thing between us was, either. Were our feelings the same all along? My friends had crowded `round me a lot when he'd left, as though trying to comfort me.

I'd found out about six months later that Olette and Pence had been dating on the sly because they hadn't wanted to upset me. Pretty silly really, since it was so obvious that they liked each other. I laughed at them when I found out: it broke the ice.

I was happy for my friends but I can't say it didn't make me feel - empty.

Like I was missing something really important but I didn't know what that something was, until they'd all sat me down, Olette, Pence and even Roxas came, too, and told me I'd been pining since he'd left - stupid Seifer.

I didn't believe them at first but it sank in eventually and they were right. I didn't want to get them all down so I did my best to put on a happy face and I dug in to my studies. I wanted to forget the jerk who couldn't even say goodbye to me.

I kept my mind off of the beanie clad bastard and it meant I could go on to university with my friends, something I'd had no prospects of before. Struggle matches with him were the one thing I lived for, sidelining my studies. Eventually, as time passed, the feelings were buried deep down in the pit of my heart and I got on with my life thinking I'd never see that idiot again.

Boy was I wrong.

Not two days into the first term of my first year at Uni and who do I see watching me from the bar in the club, not even saying hello, just giving me a cold icy stare - that bastard. I was so pissed off I stalked right up to him and slugged him one; got thrown out of the club for it, too.

I knew then that there was far more to my feelings than I had given them credit for, they had never left me and now seeing him again after two years absence I knew my feelings were bubbling under the surface again, far stronger than they had been. Absence really does make the heart go fonder - or something like that.

I wasn't really sure how to behave around him anymore. Was I supposed to go back to the way we were or, considering his more recent behaviour, I would be more likely to clock him one than want to hold him - but I wanted that, too - his warm hands on my skin.

He'd been making me both nervous and unbelievably violent. I'd given him a fair number of bruises since he'd returned to my life. He was being a complete idiot, being generally annoying not to mention a big klutz; makes me wonder what it is exactly that he's been going through that thick head of his.

He has a talent for sparking of my temper something fierce, that's why I hit him again the other day, and I gave him a split lip, which didn't look like it had healed yet, although the swelling had gone down. But I wonder if his behaviour is actually intentional or just accidental.

Olette and Pence have been behaving oddly too, being far more pushy than normal about where we're going and, if I'm not mistaken, I caught Olette talking to Fuu the other day. I wasn't close enough to hear what they were speaking about, though. But the occurrence itself is unheard of. We seem to be running into them much more frequently as well.

I would lay bets that they've been scheming - together, what an odd notion. But the question is for how long? I wonder, ever since the first night I'd seen him again? Could it really be that long - could my friends tell just being around that night what I had felt towards my one time enemy in just one interaction? It had been a rather unpleasant one at that.

I bet they're the ones making him trip into me and get us so close together that our lips are almost brushing and I can feel his breath against my suddenly over stimulated skin, causing my face to warm to an uncomfortable degree and turning him into a stuttering school boy.

This is ridiculous.

That wasn't Seifer; he's not that clumsy, especially after years of struggle matches. I should have known they'd been meddling. “That's it- this is gonna stop ...” the words left my lips but petered off and continued silently in my mind quite forcibly. For goodness sake, they're making him miserable and I bet he doesn't even realise what's going on, “that stupid bastard”. My words were a violent whisper; the guy was so dense it was unbelievable.

“Oh, shit.” The words escaped me on a rush of air, as my mind wrapped around the pieces of the puzzle, realization hitting me like a two-by-four as my palm connected with my forehead more forcibly than I had intended. I'd been hitting out at him for no reason, it wasn't his fault. “Well, doesn't that just suck?”

Who'd have thought that I'd need to apologise to the bastard after all these years. But mulling it over some more I recognised the fact that, “he's not been hitting back “, the words were spoken on a whisper and on top of that he's barely trying to defend himself when I've gotten angry at him.

Two years ago he would have pounded me into the ground for those punches to the face. Either the bastard's getting soft or, there was a light shiver that ran across my skin resonating deep inside my body. He actually meant some of the things that he had been trying to say but I hadn't let him finish, remembering the look of anguish and disappointment on his face that I hadn't let myself see before.

“Shit, I've been such an ass.” My head dropped, lower hand reaching up to tug my fingers through my wavy blond locks.

“Well that's pretty much a given, don't you think?” Looking up from where my eyes had been staring blankly at the ground, I watched as Roxas came to lean his back against the wall and slid down it to rest beside me, arms resting on bent knees in that customary position he liked. I hadn't even heard him walk up to me I'd been so deep in thought. It made me smile. Roxas was always a straight shooter except when it came to his red-head but I think that's why he was always a good person to talk to.

“You knew, didn't you, Rox, even before I did. That I -I liked him.” I watched him bob his head once as he replied.

“Yep, but I think you weren't ready for it then and neither was he.” I pondered that for a moment, staring blankly at the ground.

“Hmmm... You're probably right. I just wish everyone had stayed out of it, y'know; it's our biz and I guess in the end we all made it worse rather than better - that includes me.” I felt Roxas shuffling his position next to me at my words and I assumed that he may have had some part in what had been going on.

I looked up to catch him nodding his head in agreement, “they thought - well, we thought that we were helping you both out, we don't like seeing you both miserable, y'know. “

“I know that, I don't blame them or nothin'.” My fingers reached up, pinching the bridge of my nose as I felt the tension building there. I heard him sigh quietly.

“Let me tell you something - just because it's a mess now doesn't mean it'll always be that way. Give it time, I may not like the guy, granted he may have changed a bit or so it seems, given how long he's been gone, two years is a lot of time to change, but give it a shot.”

He looked out across the way to a nearby bench were a shock of red caught my attention and apparently his, as I turned back to see a smile playing across his pale lips where once there would never have been one; “you may get a pleasant surprise,” I could hear that smile reflected in his voice. There was warmth there that had been missing before. He turned to look at me, cerulean orbs shining, and we both smiled. I remember what he went through with Axel and now they were practically inseparable.

“Yeah - thanks, Rox. Y'know, I got somewhere to be.” Pushing up from the ground, I offered him my hand, which he grasped firmly and I hauled him back up to his feet. “You have fun with Axel. I'll see you at the club later.”

“Sure, sounds good.” He walked off, a small wave of his hand over his shoulder his only goodbye, heading for the red-head sprawled out on the bench.

“Okay, now where am I gonna find that bastard at this time of day?” Mulling that over in my head, I turned from watching Roxas and walked off in the opposite direction heading for the sandlot - as good a starting point as any. I needed to have a talk with the bastard about a few things and maybe we could figure out what exactly this thing between us was or could be.

Well, if we didn't end up killing each other first.

 

Seifer POV:

I sat down on the edge of the hill, legs drifting in the open air, lying back with my arms tucked underneath my head for support, trying to remember how it had come to this. I remember meeting lamer when we were kids, introduced by Zell as his kid brother; he'd reminded me of a chicken as his hair flicked up all over in funny li'l kinks and waves, blond no less.

I remember him scowling at me when I called him that nickname for the first time - chicken-wuss. It wasn't meant in a bad way, he just looked like a really cute kid and I couldn't help but tease him. To his credit, he didn't get upset, just stuck out his tongue as his brother laughed at the sight of us.

Zell was a good friend for a while, and Hayner and I became fast friends over that summer, we became practically inseparable and maybe that's what did it in the end. I ended up spending more time with Hayner than Zell, despite the two year age gap, and I think he got jealous.

I remember him approaching me one day and laying into me with words and fists, telling me I must be some sort of paedophile or something, words he shouldn't have known at that age. It made my blood boil just thinking about it, who in the right mind would teach that to a kid?

A few days later his brother had come to see me; face scrunched up, brown eyes red rimmed from crying, and told me point blank that he hated me. I took it that Zell had forced him into this somehow and I'd left them both alone.

I had no friends at all for years after that, I became the loner of our class and as time went on and I got older I tried my damndest to push everyone away. I knew, I had plenty of experience, with people making you miserable - friends and family alike. I joined the Struggle tournament and won. I was a pretty angry kid then and now, though I'm not a kid anymore.

Rai and Fuu just sorta got attached to me along the way and after a while we were friends of some sort or another. Even now I'm overly hostile to people, I've been hurt by others quite enough, and I recognize now that's why I never noticed my growing feelings towards Hayner as he'd gotten older. Two years apart isn't that much after all. I thought it was anger and hatred for such a long time, but as usual I was mistaken.

Then I took a break to earn some money so I could go to university and to take the time to decide what, exactly, I wanted to do with my life after discovering a few new things about myself. I worked really hard and even now I have to work every day to pay for tuition and stuff.

That day we met again was completely by accident, on my part anyways. It does make me wonder if Fuu and Rai had something to do with it. They dragged me out after work two days into the new term, telling me I should be socialising, making friends. I didn't much see the point mind you but relented after they nagged for so long. I hadn't stopped working for the past two years solid so I thought why not, y'know. I was in for one hell of a shock that night.

I'd come into the local club with Rai and Fuu close on my heels; I'm not much of a dancer but they had insisted here was where we should all go. I hadn't realized it was him at first, Rai and Fuu went off to dance and I pulled up a stool at the bar, drinking a beer and watching the dance floor, my back pressed against the wooden surface behind me.

I caught sight of a guy, tall, lightly muscled, face turned towards the ground. The way he danced. He just seemed to flow to the music, his whole body in tune with eyes pressed closed as he swayed and rocked to the rhythm. What can I say? I was entranced by him.

I couldn't peel my eyes away; I'd never approach the guy - I just wanted to watch him enjoying the music. I couldn't see him clearly because it was dark and the lights were flickering across him in a multitude of colors. I didn't know at the time that it was him.

I watched and clocked a girl leaning up to speak to him and him dipping down to allow the contact; it had made something clench in my gut - though I couldn't name what it was. He smiled down at her, his features still obscured by the darkness. She seemed to bob her head in my direction and I suppose I had been quite avidly staring. I shifted uncomfortably on my stool, tugging my beanie further down on my brow.

He glanced over but I didn't catch his expression as someone passed in front of him, I looked again and he was gone, the girl standing decidedly still on the heaving dance floor, watching me with a frown on her face.

I didn't even see him coming, he came at me from the side and slugged me so hard in the jaw my lip split; I winced at the memory feeling my current lip injury tingling. I couldn't hear him speaking as I'd been completely knocked for six by the sudden impact, but I slowly turned to face him, angry at the sudden and unprecedented hit.

I came up glaring hard, but as I looked at him, I felt my head cock to the side as I slowly looked the guy up and down. It was the dancer but he was so familiar in the light of the bar - I felt myself reach out to touch the soft blonde waves that stood up from his head. My hand got slapped away before I could make contact. I stared into burning hot eyes, filled with anger.

I could hear his voice but only just,“ You bastard - where the fuck have you been and why the hell are you just sitting there!” He was really pissed but that voice; I couldn't not react to it.

“Hayner?” He blinked slowly processing the one word I had managed to get out. It was at that point as a look of abject confusion flittered across his face that we had both been hauled off by the bouncers and thrown out of the club.

I didn't have the presence of mind to think straight and was dragged up by Rai and led home. The blood was pouring down my chin, but I hadn't even noticed it dripping to the pavement.

I gently rubbed my thumb across my lip and winced at the split that had yet to heal over. I wonder how many more hits I can take; I'll be a scarred mess at the end. I think he'd been as surprised to see me as I had been to see him.

Sitting up, I pulled my hat off my head to run idle fingers through my short hair, a small smile drifted to my lips. It had been good to see him again. I felt the sigh drift out from me as I figured out that maybe it was all over - what a mess it all was now.

I don't think I have had this many melancholy moods ever - until I saw him again. Maybe leaving him alone would be the best thing to do. He seems so unhappy whenever I'm around. I could feel the frown shifting my features as I starred dazedly off into the distance, hat clenched in my suddenly tightened fist.

I hadn't heard him approach until he elicited a soft gasp from behind me, I turned slowly to find the person I had heard and my brow furrowed further at the sight of the guy I had just had all my attention consumed by.

Hayner.

I planted my beanie back on my head and shifted up to my feet, “I'm just leaving,” speaking just loud enough to be heard over the breeze. I didn't want to fight here; there were good memories here and there were so few anywhere else I wouldn't have them tainted.

I could hear him stumble forward but I dared not look even when he whispered my name; and I felt the words whisper over my skin as a hand wrapped itself around my rapidly constricting heart. I couldn't help that reaction; it's just the way he says my name: so warmly.

“Don't worry chicken-wuss, I won't be following you anymore.” I didn't want to stop but I needed to - for him. I felt my shoulders slumping as all the tension I had been holding released: there is only so much one person can take. I peeked over at him watching as he shifted restlessly, shoulders tensed, though I couldn't figure out why.

The next words he spoke sounded harsh but there was no real heat behind them, he sounds frustrated; “Seifer - you're an ass, you know that. Stupid bastard.”

I shrugged offhandedly, though the comment did sting. “I get that a lot.” My voice sounded hollow even to me, I hope he didn't notice as I just kept walking. I would miss him something evil but it would be for the best. I would have loved to see him dance again.

 

 

Hayner POV:

I hadn't found him after two hours searching in all the places I could remember having seen him, now and before, but had no luck. I turned in the direction of Sunset Hill in hopes that once up there I could think of more places where I could look.

But as I arrived on the hill as sunset was drawing in, I found him, sitting on the edge, legs slung out over empty space, leaning against the low rail. His hand was running through startlingly pale blond strands that shone silvery in the orange light, beanie clutched in one hand, as he stared off into the distance, the smallest smile visible on those soft thin lips. I wonder what he was thinking about to cause such a gentle expression.

The sight of him there made me catch my breath in a quiet gasp. But that hair, I remember that and there is something painful in that memory, something my brother told me. I will have to ask him about that later.

I watched as he swivelled around, having failed to stifle the gasp I had elicited, my fingers pressed over my lips to try to prevent further sound escaping. He looked back at me over his shoulder from hollow eyes. He quickly replaced the beanie once he'd recognised me; maybe he'd thought I was someone else.

“I'm just leaving.” He braced his hand on the ground, pulling his legs back from the edge and rose steadily to his full height of just over six feet, his usual sleeveless trench catching in the breeze, to flow out behind him. I don't think I've ever seen him without that either. It made him distinctly Seifer. He towered over my five eight frame and I stuttered, trying to find the words to talk to him about everything I wanted to say. He just turned away to walk down the slope.

“S-Seifer?” He paused for a moment.

“Don't worry chicken-wuss, I won't be following you anymore.” I could see his shoulders slump at that quietly spoken statement and I couldn't bear it anymore: my temper was getting the better of me yet again. What was it about him that made me feel so impassioned and was I really angry at all?

“Seifer - you're an ass you know that. Stupid bastard.” I knew I was trying to get a rise out of him and hoped that it would stop him behaving in such an uncharacteristically un-Seifer like way. He shrugged in acknowledgement, saying only “I get that a lot” and continued to walk away. He sounded so forlorn and lonely and yet my legs felt like they were rooted to the spot, stuck in place and unable to follow a defeated looking man, my jaw hanging down in surprise.

I wanted so desperately to wrap my arms around him and never let go but I couldn't move one foot closer to the man I cared about. He never backed down from such a forthright challenge, right to his face, no less-well his back anyways- and he ignored me. I could feel my chest tightening and my breath coming in shallow pants; I could see my vision waiver as my whole body began to shake.

“He walked away from me and I just stood here doing nothing. I'm such a coward.” I could feel the frustration burrowing deeper in my chest, my eyes stinging with what I knew where repressed tears - I won't cry, dammit. I dropped down to my knees, drawing in great gasps of air to stave off the panic and the tears.

“No, you're not and neither is he, before you start that again.” I turned around slowly, dashing my sleeve across my eyes to remove any escaping moisture; focusing on a voice that had been yelling at me earlier with what I had thought was anger but, perhaps, was more like desperation. They'd been with him for the past two years when I wasn't; I wonder how badly they've wanted to help him. They're the only friends he has and that I think may be partly my fault.

“Fuu, Rai. What do I do?” I could hear the same tone reflected in my own voice, desperation and a quiet plea for help - I just didn't know what I was doing anymore. I felt so lost; I didn't know how to fix this, I didn't know how it became so broken when I had believed there was nothing there to start with. I never thought that the feelings I had could be reciprocated - ever and here I am trying to find a way of making him look at me again.

Fuu turned to look back at Rai, nodding to each other perceptibly. She smiled that slightly scary smile, an evil glint surfacing in her crimson orbs. “Go out to the club, dress in what you wore that first night and dance. I'm sure you'll figure it out from there.”

“But I...”I could understand what she was trying to do and I was clutching at straws at this point.

“No buts. Just go.2 She flicked her fingers at me, motioning for me to leave. I flinched back instinctively, remembering her probing fingers from earlier, flicking my eyes between the pair. I let my head bob in agreement and then, rising from my crouch, I turned to head back to my dorm room on campus to get ready, somewhat dazed. As my pace quickened, my confidence returned: I knew what I would try to do. Sometimes people needed second and third chances - today I would take mine.

 

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A few hours later and I don't think I have ever been this nervous before. I could feel the tension building and I both anticipated the outcome and wanted to run the other way. Tonight was it, wasn't it?

The beginning— or the end of it all.

I had spoken to my brother— well spoken is pretty mild to what I actually ended up saying to him. He'd let me believe for fifteen years that Seifer was a bad and dishonourable person. Zell was lying and I could feel the truth of it now, remembering hair as pale as moonshine and a scent like coffee and honey, bandaging scrapped knees, always ready with a warm gentle hand to pick me up again. How could I have forgotten someone so important to me?

That was Seifer's smell, I remember him now, odd to know he hadn't always had that scar and his traditional grey trench coat. I wondered where that scar had come from, and if he would ever tell me that story himself. I had managed to stop Fuu telling me about that but I knew there was something important about that particular story and I wanted to hear it from him.

She had told me a bit about his life before and now, he had worked so hard to get into University two years after everyone else because his family couldn't afford it, what little there was left of it. That his father was long gone and his mother wasn't around too much, either. It sounded to me like Seifer had spent most of his life alone and maybe that made more sense to me because of his hostility towards people, even his friends.

He didn't know how to interact with others. My brother and I had hurt him irreparably; I just hoped he hadn't given up completely. I knew I hadn't and if I had to have the courage to do what it took to fix this then so be it.

I have to try and if he won't take the initiative then I will, pride and nerves be damned. We've lost enough time already. “Alright, I know what I'm going to do - he'll either hit me or get really riled up - just like the Seifer I remember.” I felt my smile lift my lips just slightly; it felt like I hadn't done that in so long - funny that the cause of both had been Seifer.

“Alright, this is it,” I spoke out loud, hoping to dispel some of my anxiety, stepping out the front door of the dorms, purpose running through every line of my body. Heading for what I hoped was my future, a chill raced over my skin at that thought.

Correction - our future.

 

Seifer POV:

I entered the club late in hopes of avoiding being seen by the one guy I told not hours ago that I'd leave alone. “Damn Rai and Fuu for this,” I was growling under my breath at the two who were just ahead of me. Not only had they made me come here of all places, but they'd made me, what Fuu called, dress up.

No I don't look like a girl, just, smart I guess. What's wrong with my other clothes, damn it? Hell, she'd even tried to take my beanie which I flat out refused. He wouldn't like me at all without that - not at all.

Her excuse for dragging me out yet again was that the end of term was coming up and they wouldn't see me because I'd be working even more , which is true but ridiculous all the same. I had always made time when I could to see them - why wouldn't I? They're all I've got.

I felt my throat close over a lump at that thought. I'd never have the one person I really wanted, would I? But at least I have them and they look happy. I glanced over at the two dancing closely together in the corner, feeling the trace of a smile at the sight. I found my usual space at the bar already taken so I drifted a bit further `round, glaring at anyone who dared try and nab the seat I was destined for.

Plumping down on it and ordering a beer, just one, mind you - none of that getting drunk for me. You really think I want to look even more ridiculous and pathetic in front of the one guy I have a major thing for? Not likely!

Plus, over the summer, I'd found out that I'm a very honest drunk. Fuu hit me for that one. That made my lip quirk at the amusing yet painful memory. I rubbed at my head where she'd landed the blow subconsciously. I had kept my back facing outwards towards the rest of the club, more importantly the dance floor in hopes that he wouldn't see me sitting here.

I kept myself as focused as possible on as many inane subjects as I could so that I could resist the growing urge to shift around on my seat and locate him in the crowd. It's what I'd been doing for months now - watching him dance every week in the same spot. I'd lay a solid bet that he knew I'd been here every week since the first; he never came up to me again.

He really was exquisite - rolling hips, swaying body, he looked like he was completely rapt inside the music, delicate blond eyelashes fluttering against pale cheeks flushed with heat. I felt my body shifting inside, as his face flashed through my mind, equally flushed eyelashes fluttering, lips open in a soft groan as I.... Shaking my head hard to shift that image, I felt my hands trembling against the glass bottle in my hands. I gripped it harder as I shoved one hand up to rub at my eyes, feeling the tension building there again.

I didn't hear anyone come up behind me but I felt the sudden rush of air across my scalp as my hat was yanked off my head with a decisive jerk. Whirling first left and then right in shock, searching for the culprit and ready to exact due punishment- nobody messes with the hat- my eyes locked onto a lithe body topped with wavy blond locks. I couldn't restrain the words that slipped out, “Well shit! Would you give that back, lamer?”

I watched, surprised, as he proceeded to shove the thing into one of his pockets on his rather hip hugging khaki combats. My eyes focused on those delicate-looking bones just visible between those aforementioned trousers and a skin tight short-sleeved white shirt. Shaking my head slightly, I felt the longer strands of my hair drift forward as I tried to dislodge those crude thoughts that were drifting around in my head at the sight of his bare skin.

One of my hands went up to cover my face, or more to the point my scar; the other stretched out to retrieve my beanie, palm up in demand, hoping he'd give it back. What did I get for my effort, “Nothin' doin' bastard, not gonna happen.”

I could hear the laughter in his voice, as he reached forward to swat at both my hands. I shrugged my shoulders at his childish behaviour and turned back around to ignore him and hope that he'd just leave. He looked damn fine in that outfit; it was the same one from the first night I had seen him dancing here, all figure hugging and damn sexy.

I heard him sigh behind me and then felt a sudden warmth stretch across my back as he breathed lightly across the shell of my ear, his arms slinging carelessly over my shoulders. I tried not to tremble at his sudden proximity to my hyper aware skin, but obviously failed as he laughed when my body shivered, though I managed to repress the moan that wanted to escape, right against my ear, causing more of those fine tremors.

What the hell was the matter with me; he's just mucking around and being a big lame-ass. “What's the matter, bastard - am I bothering you?” He sounded genuinely curious and a little tentative but I could still hear the smile in his words as they slipped from his soft lips.

“Yeah, you are, so just lay off me, would you, please?2 I don't know why I said please but I hoped he'd listen to my distinctly annoyed but still pleading voice. He seemed thoughtful for a moment, tapping slender fingers against those pink tinged lips as I turned just enough to see him from the corner of my eye with him so firmly pressed to my back. I watched as his lips quirked up into a dazzling, yet mischievous smile as he focused back on my partially turned features.

“Nope - what `cha gonna give me for it, bastard?” I wasn't sure where he was headed with this but the thoughts running through my mind were causing a definitive reaction in my body. He could take anything from me and I wouldn't have minded at that moment.

Instead, I quirked a brow at him in question and felt him shift and slowly slide off my back, arms receding so that I could turn fully around to face him on the bar stool. “What - pray tell - do you want exactly, lamer?”

My hand was still rested near my face as I brought up the other to wrap around my chest, anything to stop from trying to touch him. He frowned at me; that was an expression I didn't want on his usually sunny features.

His eyes lit up as a thought finally struck him; it made me wince, the calculating smile that slid across his features spelled doom for me, I was sure of it. We seemed to be literally dancing around each other without the subject actually surfacing. It made me feel awkward and uncomfortable; it made him look like he was enjoying it. I thought I was sadistic.

“Dancing,” he said with a flourish. I shuddered before trying to clarify in my mind what he had just dared to say.

“What did you just say?”I could hear the incredulity in my voice thinking - praying— I'd heard wrong.

“I said - D-A-N-C-E. You know- dancing. That clear enough for ya?” He was enjoying this, pushing me to see if I'd react. I just scowled harder.

“I don't dance chicken-wuss - never.” I didn't want to do this. The proximity between us right now was setting my body to a steady thrum, I wanted to touch him and dancing would just make it all worse. So I refused as best I could - but I knew that if he asked again or if he challenged me further I wouldn't, couldn't refuse. It's just not in me to back down unless I know I can't win; that and I can't seem to deny him anything.

“Then maybe it's time you learnt.” I watched as he reached out to pull my hand away from my face, wrapping his hand around mine, he began to pull at my arm to make me move.

The determination in his features made me curious, he's up to something - I can tell. But what is it? I couldn't resist the call of his eyes but I had to prod at him for an answer, “You'll give me back my hat if I dance just once?”

“Maybe - depends how well you dance.” He's toying with me - and yet he seems quite serious.

I scoffed at the comment but let him drag me up off my stool and on to the dance floor, curious to see where this was going. I wanted my hat back, too; I felt naked without it, and I'd been wearing it so long it felt weird without it. I ran my other hand up through my pale hair fingering it out so it sat better whilst it was out of its confines.

I have my pride you know - damn if I'm gonna look like chicken-wuss!

He pulled me right into the middle of the pulsing crowd; the music was so loud I would have had to be ear to mouth to hear anything, so all I could see was chicken-wuss making motions for me to start moving. I didn't have a clue what I was doing and just sorta shrugged at him, swaying slightly with the crowd as it heaved and roiled around us.

He made a frustrated gesture at me and blew up a gust of air that rustled his blond locks, nibbling on his lower lip, deep in thought. He didn't even realise that he was already moving to the beat as though it had synchronized with his body and he was helpless to resist it.

I looked down, watching his whole body flow to the beat of the music. He looked both cute for the pout he bore but damn sexy as he swayed sensually to the music; my lip kicked up in a smile. His eyes flicked up to my face and he flushed slightly as his eyes widened - I guess smiling was a li'l out of place on my face.

I swiped my hand up through my hair, distinctly embarrassed at being caught staring at him with that look on my face. I turned my gaze to the floor and made to shift away.

I couldn't take this - screw the hat, I'd get a new one somewhere. The fact I didn't want to fight him for it spoke volumes to how I felt about him. I felt the tug on my bare arm as I registered that he still had my hand clasped in his. My eyes shot between his hand clutching mine and his eyes.

I must have shown my confusion, when he just pulled a bit harder getting me to turn back around. I rubbed at my face again not knowing what to do - I was the aggressive one, how could we have switched roles like this - it was damn disconcerting. I was so far out of my depth I was drowning.

Glaring hard at the floor, I didn't see him move, but he was suddenly up in my face, cheeks flushed, eyes shining brightly, happy yet something else, too. I could feel his body swaying and moving as though he were trying to teach me how to move. He placed first the hand he had been holding then the other onto his cloth covered hips, then he pressed up close and friendly with the rest of his torso conforming to mine.

I couldn't suppress the heat or the tingle that rippled across my skin at his light touches. I followed his movements slowly finding a rhythm, I wasn't really sure what I was doing but I was enjoying being close to him like this even if he was just trying to jerk me around.

His arms rose up around my head as he began to move more loosely, brushing the sides of my face every now and again his eyes drifting closed as the rhythm took him.

I couldn't help but run my thumbs up under the edge of his shirt as it shifted under my hands, slowly running my thumbs across delicate hip bones and starting a circular motion. He was so soft to the touch, I couldn't get enough and that's when I knew I needed to stop. This was bad— I couldn't be doing this to him; I'd just make it all worse.

I shifted back away from him, dislodging my hands, although reluctantly, from his hips, missing the pressure of his chest against mine and forcibly stepped back. His eyes started open in shock, fingers pressed against his lips as though he'd voiced something he shouldn't have done, and he looked shocked and embarrassed. My curiosity spiked and I had no damned defence against the blond creature in front of me. I tugged him towards me, leaning down to speak in his ear.

“What's the matter, lamer? Cat got your tongue?” I could hear the tone of my voice, deep and husky, my body humming with arousal. Damn, this was bad. He trembled against my body as my voice licked across his ear.

“N-No, I just- uhmm...” his voice was low, sultry, as I looked into his eyes. They'd dropped to half mast, coffee colour smouldering. Good God, he looked as hot as hell.

He rippled against me, hands reaching up and lacing behind my head, his whispered one word which sent my body to blazing; just one word, my name, “Seifer.” It was filled with need and my whole body responded to it. I pulled us snugly together, hearing his rough exhalation of air as our bodies seemed to ripple together.

I shifted against him, all my primal urges coming to the floor. I really wanted him beneath me right now; I had to settle for being on this dance floor with his body pressed up as close to mine as possible. It was likely the only time I'd be allowed such contact with him.

We moved in sync with each other, his arms around my neck, head flung back, and eyelids fluttering under the sensual movements of our bodies. I wasn't unaffected: my hands roamed his back and hips, bodies rippling together as we danced. The music disappeared and I just watched him as we danced together as though we were caught in an insular bubble together. The music slowed and our movements eased with it.

He looked up at me as though coming up from a daze, so beautiful. I couldn't help myself as our eyes locked together, my hand lifted to run my thumb along his jaw as my fingers slipped around the side of his neck, making small soothing motions. I leant down, leaning into him and pressed my lips against his softly— chastely, considering the pure need coursing through my blood right then. It was just the slightest amount of pressure. He whimpered at the contact, snapping me straight back to where we were and what the hell I was doing. I couldn't stop the words that rasped from my disused voice, “Holy shit!”

This is a mistake, he's probably drunk off his ass - he'd never do this with me, of all people. Plus, he's not gay. I pushed back, causing him to stumble as I whirled around and headed for my coat and the front door.

As much as I cared about him, I wasn't going to be humiliated in front of everyone by taking him when drunk when I knew damn well he didn't like me like that. Grabbing my coat at the check-in, I stormed out the front doors pulling it on under the fine drizzle. I stopped a few minutes later pressing my head in to my hands, running agitated hands through my damp hair. “Shit. Just... awww... shit!”

“Well, aren't you articulate? Stupid bastard.” I turned in a whirl of grey cloth, sprinkling droplets across the pavement to stare at the smaller blond. He'd run out in the rain without a coat to follow me, pale shirt turning slowly translucent with the steadily pouring rain, as a fine tremor racked his form. He'd found me in a complete state because I had finally kissed him, something I had yearned to do for months; I'd had him wrapped in my arms and it was all just a stupid joke.

“Just go the fuck away, will you? Haven't you done enough?” I turned away again, embarrassed by the thickness in my voice and the heat I could feel in my face at looking at him in a now revealing shirt.

“S-Seifer.” His voice was perilously close to trembling; I could hear it above the rain as it wobbled and quaked as he tried to contain it. I'd remember that sound anywhere: I had been the cause of it often enough.

If I looked at him now I would break. I wanted to touch him, comfort him - hell I just wanted to get him out of the rain. But I held on to the quiver in my voice as I spoke again, “Hayner - just go back, will you? Forget this happened, it's stupid.” I reached my hand up to massage my eyes, trying to fight down the prickling I could feel behind them. I will NOT cry.

The gasp behind me made me wince, I didn't want him to hurt but I wouldn't push my feeling onto another it wasn't fair. The sudden pounding of feet on wet concrete reached my ears as he yelled almost violently at me, “Think fast, Seifer!” He was so pissed off that I expected a solid hit somewhere as I threw my arms up in a defensive position only to have his solid form hit me full force.

Feeling his slim fingers reach up and wind themselves in my hair, yanking me down to him with such strength our noses mashed together as he pressed a full kiss to my parted lips. His tongue darted in to my mouth and overtook everything, not gentle but firm and commanding.

It inspired a direct response from me, pressing our bodies more closely together as my lips returned the pressure back with very gentle motions, my tongue twining around his and massaging it slowly, pushing back in to his mouth to explore all the tender spots I could reach.

I caught the moans he was making in my mouth and it made my body vibrate with pleasure. I pulled back for air as he was struggling to breathe under my returned onslaught. His voice whispered across my skin, “Seifer, take me home, please.” His voice was dripping with heat and need but the words didn't make sense.

I pulled back further looking into drooping lids covering molten chocolate orbs. “Where is home?” I frowned down at the sultry look he was giving me.

“Where ever you are stupid.2 I felt the largest, stupidest grin split my face and he answered with one of his own. Tugging me down again for a softer, sweeter kiss, our bodies moulding together as the rain poured steadily down on us, I could feel him against ever contour of my body.

Perfect. As our bodies slid together, moving to an unknown tune.