Kingdom Hearts Fan Fiction ❯ Desperate Reflections ❯ Resonant Dreams ( Chapter 3 )

Thanks to readers and reviewers! I hope you enjoy this next chapter!
Warning: SPOILERS to Kingdom Hearts II. Truthfully, this whole fic is gonna have spoilers.

Chapter Two: Resonant Dreams

This time the dream was different than before. Rather than experiencing it firsthand, it was more like he was watching from afar, though he could still feel every emotion that coursed through his past self and every physical pain and movement. It was strange and yet interesting as well. He watched with curious eyes as more of his past unfolded in front of him. But the more he observed, the more it felt like he was melding with the scene, though it didn’t help his comprehension in the slightest.

Before him was the same blond-haired boy from the previous dream, slowly lowering his weapon as the last of his enemies faded away into nothingness. Axel himself strode into the room, arms crossed over his chest and a perpetual almost-sneer on his face. He tried to ignore the way his heart leapt at the sight of the younger boy, settling for nonchalant anger instead.

“Simply amazing, Roxas,” he commented snidely. He felt the words come from his mouth, watched them take form, even as the blond boy’s name returned to his memory. As quickly as it had been forgotten, it flared to life in his mind, beating to the same rhythm as his heart.

Roxas frowned, turning completely to regard him with a slightly annoyed expression. “Axel,” he said simply, merely acknowledging the other male’s presence.

Axel bit back a mocking laugh as he gestured with his arms, slightly surprised. “You really do remember me this time? I’m so FLATTERED!” The last came out on an angry shout, the depth of his emotional pain shocking even himself. It almost felt like it was torn from his soul, and his magic reflected that.

Immediately, the room burst into flames, completely surrounding the two young men with flames of scarlet and orange that towered well over them, bathing the basement lab in a blazing heat. Roxas jumped in shock at the sudden bout of searing fire but managed to compose himself even as emerald eyes blazing with fury turned their anger towards him.

“But you’re too late!” Axel snapped as he threw his arms to the side, the flames flaring brighter with the force of his anger.

Roxas narrowed his eyes, immediately dropping into his attack position. It wouldn’t have been the first time that the scarlet-haired man had started a battle. In the same moment that he did so, his weapons came to his hands, materializing by intuition rather than some choice. Yet, the Axel that looked through the eyes of his angry counterpart could not recognize the strange blades. The more the strange dream progressed, the more he felt drawn into the events, almost compulsively, like he had no choice.

“Two?” Axel questioned, not really surprised. He smirked at Roxas, ignoring the flaring emotions inside of him and settling for the most familiar ones: anger and chaos. After all that time… all that searching, the only Roxas he could find did not remember him or their friendship. It was painful, hurting in places that weren’t supposed to even exist.
Axel summoned his weapons, the twin chakram, as another flurry of flame burst to life. “Come here,” he almost taunted, locking his gaze on the much shorter boy. “I’ll make it all stop.”

Roxas frowned and narrowed his eyes, gripping the hilt of his weapons tightly in his hands. He wasted no time in attacking, rushing at the taller male with a battle cry.

They attacked each other in a flurry of movement, each blade easily meeting with Axel’s twin chakram with fierce and resounding clangs. The fire roared around them, rising to higher pinnacles of heat as the metal flashed and breaths echoed in heavy pants. Roxas lunged at him, one hand thrust forward with blade aiming for a delicate position, but Axel quickly blocked, twisting away in a whirl as he aimed a fireball attack at the smaller boy.

Roxas easily dodged, thrusting his feet against the ground so that he propelled himself into the air, attempting an attack from above. Weapon met weapon again as Axel slid backwards across the floor, neither of them yielding to the other’s strength. Roxas executed a flip and landed on his feet before growling again, coming at Axel in a flurry of quick and sharp swipes of his oddly shaped blades.

Even though his anger nearly consumed him, Axel still didn’t have the heart to actually try to harm Roxas. He hoped that this duel would draw out the deeply-seeded memories, but he found it difficult to draw the line between fighting with skill and fighting not to harm the blond.

He easily dodged a particularly intricate move, sudden inner thoughts momentarily distracting him. But in that one step backwards, he realized he had fallen for the young blond’s trap. A blade came up, flashing before he could defend it as one chakram scurried out of his grip, his entire arm reverberating from the strike. Roxas echoed an angry snarl, ocean eyes bright with fury as he violently swung both weapons, Axel only having enough time to block them both with his one remaining blade.

The taller male was thrown backwards, barely registering that somewhere during the fight and his distraction, he had been injured across his arm, blood leaking from the tear in the black fabric. Pain and disappointment quickly replaced his emotions when he winced.

As Axel slumped to one knee, breath coming in harsh gasps around him, the flames borne from his anger disappeared, the floor beneath it not charred. For a moment, the two males stared at each other in silent recognition, the last time they had met with Roxas’ memory intact passing between them in the blink of an eye. Recognition dawned on the blond, and he lowered both his gaze and his blades, staring sadly at the beaten scarlet-haired boy.

“Axel…” Roxas murmured, this time seeming to truly remember. His ocean-colored eyes watched as Axel seemed to fade, his form wavering.

The emerald-eyed boy smirked, shaking his head. “Let’s meet again in the next life,” he suggested more on a whim than anything. The older boy didn’t really believe he had one.

Roxas nodded. “Yeah,” he agreed. “I’ll be waiting.” For a moment, it seemed to Axel that standing before him was the very same boy who had walked away all that time ago… the one who had been his close friend, his dear companion in an organization of back-stabbers and manipulators. A connection that seemed unable to be severed almost coursed between them… until Axel chuckled lowly, a sad emotion glinting in his eyes.

“Silly. Just because you have a next life…” Axel commented, even as the darkness encroached about him, his body dissolving into a greyish-black mist until there was nothing left.

----

Axel awoke and found himself staring straight into inquisitive crimson eyes. Were it not for the fact that the lingering emotions from the dream/memory were still coursing through him, he might have been shocked. As it was, he was mostly confused. Vincent was poised over him, body hovering as he was straddling Axel on all fours, face unnaturally close. Axel blinked, not saying anything and belatedly realizing that the dark-haired man also had a firm grip on his arms, as if to hold him down.

“You were having a nightmare… or something similar,” Vincent explained succinctly, their faces so close that Axel could smell the older man’s faintly minty breath. “The thrashing about was audible, even in the outer rooms.”

Axel nodded but didn’t speak. Truthfully, he didn’t know what to say. He shifted under the man’s touch, uncomfortable with his nearness.

Vincent searched his face before nodding to himself and releasing the restraining hold, carefully climbing off the younger male. He seated himself in the chair as Axel sat up, not taking his gaze off the tattooed male.

“Who is Roxas?” Vincent questioned as Axel yawned and tried to bring himself to alertness.

His body felt unnaturally fatigued… as if his dreams had really occurred and he had been fighting all night. And perhaps he had been. Vincent had said that he was thrashing about in his sleep. Remnants from reliving the fight most likely.
Axel shifted where he sat on the bed, lips pursed in thought as he considered the winged male’s question. Who was Roxas? As if he knew. He could describe Roxas… explain some of his personality, but in terms of relation to himself, Axel couldn’t say.

“Someone… something… I dunno, one of those memories,” he answered with an aggravated sigh. He ran a hand through his hair, attempting to tame the wild locks. “I don’t know his exact meaning to me, but he’s always in my dreams. My memories seem to be wound about him.”

Vincent nodded in understanding. “Then, it is likely that he is important.”

The younger male snorted. “I could have told you that one,” he commented before peering at the dark-haired man. “What is your job?” he questioned, changing the subject. That had been something not answered in their discussion in the day previous, and Axel felt now was the perfect moment to bring it up.

“I’m what is known as a Gatherer,” Vincent explained. “I patrol the Forgotten Plains, rescuing those about to be devoured by the Memory-eaters and then taking them to the Center of New Life to be given a name and place.”

Axel frowned. That had not happened to him.

“And me?” he questioned.

Vincent sighed. “I was supposed to take you directly to the Center, and indeed, I was going to. But after I saved your life, when I went to lift you from the ground, in your delirious state you grabbed my arm and mumbled something about ‘Roxas, don’t go.’ In that moment, I knew that you still retained some of your memories, even if only in the slightest, like me. I decided to give you a choice before they took it from you. Not to mention, I saw you call forth both your weapon and magic, something that most here cannot do, even instinctually.”

“Choice?”

Crimson eyes turned away from him, focusing their attention out the window, still displaying a dim and grey formless sky. What the dark-haired male found so interesting outside, Axel couldn’t quite figure. Or perhaps it was a way of distancing himself. Regardless, Vincent nodded his head in response to the question as his wings twitched faintly.

“Yes. You are not given that here. When you arrive, all traces of your former life and memories are forever taken from your body, torn without permission, and you are forced into a new existence… whether you want it or not.” A sardonic smile took over his face, a truly bitter expression. “That is, if you even remember enough to know that you will be losing something.”

Axel was confused. “Wait… so then this is not a good place? These are the bad guys?”

There was a shrug. “Good… bad… it’s all a matter of perspective. Personally, I prefer to believe that there is no such thing as good or evil, only different sides to the same story.”

“Che,” the redhead remarked, frowning as he leaned back against the headboard and crossed his arms over his chest. Only a stranger, he had already learned what to expect from Vincent. A clear and decisive answer was not one of those things. “Alright then.” He gestured towards Vincent before tapping his own head. “Then, why are my memories taking a hike if I’m still able to remember who I am?”

Again with the bitter smile, only a brief tugging at the corner of the stoic man’s mouth as the claws of one hand made a light tapping sound on the arm of the chair. “There is something in this world – its air, its soil – as if it had the magic properties to pull everything of what you once were, until you become someone else. As if somehow it could sense what you are not allowed to have.” That almost blood-like gaze returned to Axel. “If you want to keep them, you must cling to what you own, guard it. Find little ways to remind yourself of anything that may be important and always be wary of the shadow beasts… those that creep through the town consuming the memories of the deepest hidden part of your heart.”

“But I don’t have a heart,” Axel pointed out bluntly, the words falling from his lips before he even registered them. He furrowed his brow. What? He didn’t have a heart? Where the hell had that come from?
Vincent seemed faintly amused. “Oh? Then, you are a heartless?”

Axel scowled. “Don’t patronize me. You know I don’t remember what the hell I am.”

“My apologies.” The dark-haired man didn’t seem the least bit apologetic, the smug bastard. “It seemed you were so sure of yourself, just now.”

A scarlet eyebrow twitched, a hint of annoyance registering in his features. “You’re making fun of me,” he said shortly, glaring at the older man.

The corner of Vincent’s mouth twitched, but he returned his gaze to the window. “Perhaps… but still, it is rather refreshing.”

Axel cocked his head to the side. “What the hell are you talking about?”

The smile fell as the dark-haired man rose to his feet, tilting his head downwards to look at the people milling about in the streets below his third-story apartment. “You will understand when you see those that live here.” His voice had a solemn tone to it, almost as if he pitied all the residents of Gaia’s Grotto.

Out of pure curiosity, the redhead threw back the covers of the bed and moved to stand beside Vincent at the window, pushing away the curtains so that he could look down as well. He was not able to see faces very well, but no one seemed to be moving about in any sort of hurry. There was a steady stream of traffic going in both directions, and everything was a dismal bleak color. There were only shades of grey or black, nothing bright or vibrant. He self-consciously patted his own scarlet hair, wondering if it would fade in color as time went by. He had the feeling that if he was to go downstairs and walk among those nameless faces, he would find something that he did not like in their expressions. It made him shiver before he even realized he was doing so.

When Vincent looked at him out of the corner of his eye, Axel shook his head. “I can’t explain it. I don’t even know why. But just looking from here, it’s almost like everyone is… mechanical.”

Crimson eyes returned to their gaze at the general populace. “In many ways, they are. When everything that you are is removed, and you are expected to become something new, follow strict guidelines. It becomes difficult to stand out.”

Axel felt horrified, his fingers clenching against the fabric of the curtain. “How?” he demanded, hating how his voice came out strained. “How can they stand it? Why don’t they protest? Riot? Something dammit!?”

The look on the dark-haired man’s face was sympathetic, almost pitying. “Because they don’t remember that there is something better,” he replied simply. “They don’t even remember enough to wish for it. In a way, this place is a prison, a hell of its own making. Without bars or walls, they are captive here by their own lack of self.”

Axel turned towards the other male accusingly. “You told me this was a place for renewal! Repentance! For people who didn’t get a chance to live!” He didn’t realize he had raised his voice until the words came… nor that his hands were fisted and almost threateningly shaking at Vincent.

Vincent sighed. “It is. Just because you can remember, doesn’t mean that they did.” His eyes traced the outline of the window, seemingly unable to look at Axel. “And for some forgetting is the kindest thing someone can offer them.”

“It’s still not right!” the redhead insisted, gritting his teeth. “I may not recall fully who I miss… or why I have these feelings! But I can’t just forget! I can’t just let go of that!” He waved his hand in wild declaration. “I want to remember! I want to find him again!” His gaze fell to the floor as he looked down, hands shaking in fists at his sides. His voice came out unnaturally soft. “I just don’t see how someone can give it up.”

The dark-haired man was not one to miss that slip, and he grinned faintly, turning his eyes onto his expressive companion. “You really want to keep them then? Your memories?” he questioned quietly.

The younger man nodded but didn’t reply.

Vincent smiled softly. “Very well then. I can help you with that. It is, after all, why I felt so inclined to rescue you to begin with.” His wings twitched faintly, a slight stretching motion before settling down against his back, acting almost as if they had a life of their own.

“What do you mean?” Axel questioned, making a conscious effort to calm the sudden anger that had risen in him. The true depth of his feelings had nearly overwhelmed him, surprising him with its intensity and voracity. It was strange and yet satisfying… that righteous fury. His fingers cramped as he sought to unfurl them, but he still gave Vincent his full attention.

The crimson-eyed man nodded, moving to sat back down in the chair. His body adjusted itself accordingly, wings flexing before shifting into a comfortable place. He leaned his chin on one hand and laid the other on the arm of his chair, idly tapping it. Axel copied his movements to an extent, flopping down on the bed and sitting upright.

“Here on Gaia’s Grotto, those that reject their new lives aren’t accepted. They are cast immediately from the world, not even given a choice.”

Axel furrowed his brow. “Isn’t that a good thing? For those that don’t want to be here?”

Vincent shook his head. “No. Remember, this is for second chances. It’s straight into nothingness, into that all-consuming blankness for those that reject it.”

The other male couldn’t help but shudder at the thought. Though he wondered which was worst, living having forgotten who you are… or dying and remaining yourself. Not all prisons were made of steel and stone, not all walls as infinite and infallible.

“I still have to take you to the Center,” Vincent continued. “You are nearly overdue for it. Any longer, and they will get suspicious.”

“But they’ll erase my memories there!” Axel protested. “That’s what you said!”

The fingers tapped impatiently. “I did. However, you did not let me finish.” He leveled his gaze on the younger male. “There is one way to dilute the effect of the Cleansing so that it only appears to have an effect on you. You know your name already, but surely, there is something strong and resonant inside of you that you cling to… someone, something precious that will keep your sanity and yourself. All you would have to do then is to pretend to accept the new name and life they give you afterwards.”

“Like you did?”

Vincent nodded. "Hai. In public, I am Ceran, but I work in secret to find a way from this planet, helping those with the same desires." His gaze lowered to the floor, something akin to regret and sorrow reflecting in his eyes. "Very few make it through the cleansing, however. I wouldn't want you to build up false hope.”

The scarlet-haired male shrugged, stretching casually. “Not as if I have a lot of real hope to begin with. I don’t have much of a choice, either way.”

He smiled faintly, eyeing Axel with a slightly bemused look. “I do see something in you though, and I think that perhaps you can."

Axel snorted. "Of course, I can!” he boasted, completely sure of himself. “These are my damn memories, and I'm keeping them!"

A real smile, something that Axel was seeing for the first time, finally appeared on the other man’s face… as if he had found either a kindred spirit or someone who would not go down as easy as the others. He nodded his head at Axel’s exuberance. “You have a few hours to find that special memory. At the end of my shift, I shall return and take you to the Center. After that, it’s up to you,” he explained, gracefully sliding to his feet so that his cloak resettled about his form comfortably.

Special memory, hmm? Well, that was easy enough for Axel to understand. It was obviously that blond boy, Roxas, but he didn’t know what exactly that young man meant to him or why every one of his dreams involved him. Regardless, he was certain that within him was the key to his memories, not to mention that strange feeling that assaulted his emotions every time he thought of the ocean-eyed male. There was something there that he just couldn’t quite put a finger on. Axel frowned, inwardly waving away his thoughts and returning his attention to Vincent.

“You still have to work? I thought you were off.”

Vincent waved a slightly clawed hand, dismissing the comment. “This is my rest break for my wings,” he added. “Nightmares aren’t uncommon when your memories are fighting to resurface. I made it a point to check into your welfare.”

The other male smirked. “My welfare, hmm?” He leaned forward, peering into crimson eyes. “You were worried about me!” he crowed, laughing when a flustered look appeared briefly on his rescuer’s face.

An eyebrow twitched before Vincent turned away hastily. “I was concerned for your mental well-being,” he insisted. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must return to work.” He nodded slightly, dismissing himself.

Axel laughed at the older man’s discomfiture, rising up off the bed. “I’m teasing, man,” he said. “Though you are cute when you’re embarrassed.”

“I’m not embarrassed,” Vincent retorted shortly, already heading for the door. His wings seemed to sense his mood, twitching almost continuously. “I’m going to be late.”

“Hmph,” Axel muttered, following the older male as he moved down the hall. “And what am I supposed to do? Until you come back, that is?”

Vincent shrugged. “I think that you can amuse yourself for a few hours.” The winged man smirked as he reached for something hanging on a peg near the exit, buckling it around his thigh with practiced ease.

Curiosity ate at Axel, especially since Vincent seemed like such a private man. Almost like a mystery box with one of those damned riddles that although it was aggravating, the prize was in the solving.

“What’s that?” he questioned, moving forward and pushing Vincent’s cloak aside to reveal the mysterious item. He didn’t fail to notice the other male subtly recoiling from the almost intimate touch. Axel’s fingers brushed over what appeared to be a holster as his eyes widened in surprise.

“That’s some serious firepower there, Vince,” he commented, slightly awed. Too busy admiring the weapon, however, he did not notice when the already pale man seemed to whiten further, stiffening at something he had said. “What’s it called?”

Before Axel could even say anything more, he was roughly shoved away, nearly tripping over his own heels as he fell against the wall. Vincent tugged his cloak over himself almost violently as he hissed, “Don’t call me that!” before yanking the door open. “I’ll be back in a few hours!” Somehow, the door managed to shut without being slammed as he disappeared.

For a moment, Axel stood there, pushed against the wall, hardly blinking. That was the first time he had ever seen Vincent react so outwardly. He wasn’t frightened… but confused… and perhaps a bit guilty. Somehow, he had upset the other man without realizing it. It sure was a shitty way to repay him for his help. He stared at the door for a few seconds before realizing that standing there like an idiot was accomplishing nothing.

Then with a sigh, Axel ran a hand through his hair as he ambled into the kitchen, a grumbling stomach quickly becoming a distraction. He made a vow to himself as he rummaged about in the nearly empty refrigerator that he would be more careful in the future around Vincent. Not that he was afraid of the winged man… okay, perhaps he was just a little, but it was only polite.

It was more because he could tell that whatever he had said had hurt the man, and he wasn’t out to harm someone that had probably saved him from being erased forever. Despite his strength, in many ways the dark-haired man seemed fragile, a startling contrast. It only furthered Axel’s resolve to help Vincent find a way off Gaia’s Grotto, for the other man’s sake if not his own.

---

They were greeted as they walked into the Center for New Life. Actually, it was Vincent who was greeted, Axel mostly received smiles and stares, some of appreciation but most of wariness, like they feared him. He couldn’t help but wonder why. Then again, compared to how the rest of the world looked: drab, conformed, quiet… he might have seemed extravagant and exotic. He didn’t think he could ever get over what Gaia’s Grotto appeared like outside of Vincent’s home.

Even though he saw it from above, being carried by the winged male was an interesting experience to say the least, it would be forever impressed upon his mind. He agreed with Vincent. This place was no Heaven. It was Hell thinly disguised with the ideas of “freedom” and “renewal.” He would surely go mad if he didn’t find a way to escape. He didn’t see any forms of entertainment other than the rather huge library.

He remembered that Vincent didn’t own a television, nor did he see any evidence of a game field or a theater… or anything else for that matter. As if life’s little pleasures weren’t allowed. It made him ill. He couldn’t see any bars or chains, but it surely felt like a prison. It wasn’t until Vincent had kindly asked him to settle that Axel even realized he was squirming uncomfortably in the unnaturally strong arms of the other man.

When Vincent had come home from work, he had acted like nothing had happened, as if he had never gotten angry with Axel. The redhead was content to let be that way for the time being, unwilling to push him further. Still, he vowed to find out more about it later, perhaps when he could catch Vincent off guard or make sure that the man wasn’t going to leave on him. The dark-haired male was intriguing, an enigma, and he fascinated Axel, especially since it was obvious there was a story, if Vincent truly wanted to escape from Gaia’s Grotto that badly.

The older man didn’t respond to anyone as they walked, merely nodding his head at them or sometimes completely ignoring them altogether. Axel did notice that a faint twitching of his eyebrows and slight grimace had taken over the man’s features. Apparently, Vincent was not altogether fond of crowds. He kept a firm clawed grip on Axel’s shoulders, while the jade-eyed man tried his best to look around in confused amusement. He had a front to keep up after all.

As they walked through the decidedly boring and unadorned hall that was made of glass and stone like the rest of the building, Axel was surprised by how many others he saw with wings. They were of all different sizes and designs, some feathered like a bird or angel, some scaly like a dragon. He had believed, for some unknown reason, that Vincent was the only one with wings, but he had obviously been mistaken.

“I will take you first to the council room. From there, I will declare where and in what state I found you before they quickly take you off to be cleansed,” said Vincent, softly explaining what as to be happen. He spoke lowly, keeping his eyes locked on the path ahead as his boots were nearly soundless on the tiled floor below. “If you make it through the cleansing, I will offer to introduce you to your new home and job that way you don’t have to act for too long.”

Axel nodded in understanding. “Right.” He paused, frowning for a moment. “So… should I pretend to be scared… or just confused and awed when I go in there?”

The dark-haired man shrugged nearly imperceptibly. “Reactions are varied. Some of the more brave are excited. The more fearful frightened. And still others were so lost they could do nothing but stare ahead blankly. It is up to you.” He smirked faintly. “However, please refrain from making any statements referring to your true name or your memories… else they will try to use a much stronger cleansing method to remove them. Even more importantly, remember that afterwards when they give you a name.”

Axel logged that away for future reference, unable to suppress the small shiver of nervousness that shot through him. Even though he knew which memory to cling to, as Vincent had instructed, he couldn’t help but wonder if it was enough. All he knew was a name, and that wasn’t much to go on. He feared losing himself as well, even though he knew he wouldn’t even remember it afterwards.

It pissed him off that they would make their decision for him. That this council thought it could decide what it wanted like everyone else were merely slaves under its command. He vowed that if they ever found a way off Gaia’s Grotto, then they would also find a way to rescue those bound there. It was just plain wrong.

A small tightening of the hand on his shoulder caused Axel to look up. Vincent was directing him towards a door… an elevator to be more precise. The doors had already slid open, awaiting their entrance. Once inside the surprisingly cramped space, Vincent pressed the key for the seventh floor and up they went, not as smoothly as Axel would have liked. He was only glad that there was no music playing.

They didn’t speak any further, the dark-haired man’s face pulled into an almost broody expression as he stared blankly at the floor. As it was, Axel was too nervous and thoughtful to consider conversation as well. He had in his mind what the council would be like: a table full of old people all staring at him with judging eyes and penetrating glares. He shivered unconsciously at that.

But when the doors to the elevator slid open, admitting them to the seventh floor of the Center with a mild chime, he had to resist the urge to drop his jaw in stock. The doors slid aside to reveal a mid-sized room devoid of all furniture save a row of what appeared to be televisions lining the far wall, which wasn’t really that much of a distance away. There was nothing else to indicate importance within the room. Axel snuck a glance at Vincent, but the dark-haired didn’t seem perturbed. He had thought for sure that they were in the wrong room.

As they stepped across the threshold into the room, one by one the televisions popped on, shadowed faces filling their screens, eight in all. Yet, he couldn’t distinguish anything about the person behind the silhouette. Vincent moved to the center of the room, standing somewhere between the fourth and fifth television, saluting rigidly as he presented Axel to them. It wasn’t that difficult for the redhead to feign his awe, he was confused.

“State your findings, Gatherer,” spoke one of the screens, but Axel couldn’t discern which, only assuming it was one of the last three judging by the direction it had come from. The voice was female, but that was all he recognized.

Vincent inclined his head slightly. “On my last sweep, I came across this young man nearly beset by the memory beasts. He has no memory, as to be expected, councilor.” His voice was almost mechanical, strangely robotic, as if reciting from a pre-planned speech. Axel immediately didn’t like the sound of it but refrained from making a comment.

All of the sudden, he knew without a doubt that eight pairs of eyes had turned on him. He felt distinctly uncomfortable, squirming where he stood as they appraised him and resisting the urge to bare his teeth and clench his fists. These were the so-called rulers of Gaia, the ones that made all the decisions, the men and women that wouldn’t let him keep his memories. Despite his discomfiture, his righteous anger was beginning to return in full force. He fought it down, if only to protect what was rightfully his.

“Welcome to Gaia’s Grotto,” said a female voice pleasantly, one vaguely off to the right. He swiveled his head in her direction but was distracted by a male tenor to the left.

This one was not quite so pleasant, so rude he could almost feel the sneer directed at him. “You will enjoy your stay here, we assure you,” that one assumed. “It is after all, a privilege that you have been allowed on this world to begin a new life.”

“A new life?” Axel questioned, putting as much awe and confusion into his voice as much as he was able.

Another male snorted, the silhouette on the screen directly in front of Axel wavering slightly as if its occupant had moved. “He is a rather poor specimen.” The man sniffed. “But I suppose he will do. Give him to the twins.”

A door to Axel’s left clicked open audibly at the man’s words, a child emerging and drawing the redhead’s attention. She was tiny, frail, and expressively dark-skinned with large brown eyes. She couldn’t have been more than seven or eight, but there was a definite aura of strength about her, despite the lithe frame. She stood there complacently, quietly, seemingly awaiting further instructions. Vincent, Axel noticed, had gone completely silent, almost blending into the shadows.

“Arisawa,” came the same cold and somewhat frightening tone, much like the saccharine sweet sneer of a sadistic child molester. “This man is to be given to the twins. Take him to the proper capsule.”

She nodded, bowing deeply as she closed her almost unnaturally dark eyes. “Hai, sensei,” she said softly before looking up and eyeing Axel appraisingly, almost as if trying to discern whether or not he was beneath her notice. Despite her pixyish features, she sent a trill of dread through the tattooed man’s body. He was twice her size, dammit; he shouldn’t fear her!

Nevertheless, he went along with the child, unwilling to appear contrary to the council and have them change their decision. As she led him away, Axel could hear the distinct and familiar sound of Vincent’s voice speaking softly to the council, though he couldn’t make out the words.

They walked through the door, and Axel found himself in a wide open, brightly lit space that was devoid of any decoration or furniture except for the mysteriously shaped contraption in the direct center of the room. It was vaguely shaped like an egg, an off-white color, sitting on a three-pronged stand. The capsule-like object was large enough to fit a grown man, even one of his lanky height and had many tubes, wires, and protrusions extruding from its otherwise smooth and metallic surface.

He paused to gape at it, wondering what the hell it was, when Arisawa grabbed one of his hands, gently tugging it forward. Axel looked down to find her quietly watching him, those strangely dark eyes completely expressionless. Again that vaguely unsettling feeling washed over him, and he swallowed thickly, letting her drag him to where she liked without argument, which just happened to be directly towards the faintly gleaming egg-shaped device.

He watched in a deranged sort of fascination as the object seemed to almost bloom, the closer they approached, making a slit large enough for someone of his side to slide through and enter. Axel had the feeling that he was supposed to go into that thing, and he swallowed nervously once more.

“This is called the Cleanser,” she explained quietly as they stood outside the parted metal, gesturing to it off-handedly. “It should help you remember.”

He resisted the urge to scream “Lies!” at her, only nodding dumbly. She watched him with those eyes before coaxing him inside. He put one hand on the cold slim metal a bit apprehensively, staring into the darkened aperture. A slight pressure on his back had him swallowing thickly and going inside.

As he suspected, it was ovate, the bottom and top both coming to a vague sort of point. He turned to look behind him at Arisawa, but she was already taking a step backwards, allowing the sides of the egg-shaped Cleanser to come together, effectively sealing him within, although the cap remained open. He looked up, bright streams of light glinting down on him, nearly startling when she poked her head over the top. As the last latch clicked into place, there was a sudden thunking sound before a rushing noise filled the ovate space.
Before he knew what was going on, the Cleanser began to fill with some sort of liquid. He had to fight down the rising panic, unwilling to look up helplessly at Arisawa. He could still feel her penetrating gaze on him, and that only unnerved him further. Despite the fact that it sounded like water, he didn’t really believe it was so, not with the way the liquid seemed to conform to his body, lifting him up effortlessly. It gradually slowed as it filled to the top, and he found the nervousness fading away. He wouldn’t drown.

“Lie back and relax. Just let go,” Arisawa suggested, a big smile on her face that was not the least bit encouraging as he looked up at her. He nodded in understanding, and she stepped back, pressing something outside the capsule to activate it.

The lid closed as he attempted to settle back into the liquid, immediately disliking the sensation. The bright florescent lights above were blocked out by the cap, and he was suddenly, completely, and silently alone. He could hear nothing of what was beyond the egg-like device, even as he laid back and attempted to float, just as the young girl had explained to him. Several long minutes passed, or perhaps it was only seconds, time seemed to pass by differently. He lost all sense of it.

It was distinctly unsettling, the feeling of being weightless within the warm water. It made him feel almost as if he wasn’t there. Combined with the complete lack of sound and sight, he started to feel like his existence was fleeting, fading away like sakura blossoms on the wind. He could breathe, but the pressure of the water on his chest was like a heavy blanket, and as much as he wanted to move, he didn’t think it would be possible. He lacked both the strength and will.

Just when Axel thought he couldn’t stand it anymore and was beginning to panic, something happened, his perception of everything changed. He couldn’t really explain how he knew it was coming, just that he sensed something about the situation had altered. A faint humming rippled through the water and through his body in undulating waves, and he opened his eyes, not even knowing that he had closed them.

He nearly gasped at what he saw. What before had been complete darkness, now seemed to be a burst of rainbow sunlight across and along the shell of the device they had put him in. The very walls seemed to move, rippling and twirling along with the multi-colored glow that writhed and danced. It captivated his attention, his gaze riveted on the undulating blue and purple, wrapped around a green forest of golden sparkles. He longed to reach and touch, but his hands seemed useless, devoid of all movement.

He couldn’t even speak or gasp in awe, mesmerized by the dancing color. His world view faded, dropped away until there was nothing but him and the color… him and the metal capsule. Axel was no longer even aware of the water, and for a moment, he forgot why he was even there to begin with, too captivated by the colors. Then, a voice echoed across his subconscious, more like a subtle whisper, but it was enough to shake him momentarily from the entrancing spell of the lights.

His memory! His reason! Of course. He had nearly fallen for their trap. Forcefully closing his eyes, Axel sucked in as deep a breath as he was able and sought to push away the thrumming of the capsule, ignoring the lights that still seemed to push at his closed eyelids.

“Roxas…” he mouthed to himself, though he couldn’t hear the words. He felt the tremor of his voice, however, and centered on that, locking his attention. He filled his thoughts with ocean blue eyes, an angry glare, raging fire… anything and everything that he could remember he played through his mind over and over, like something stuck on repeat.

“Axel… Roxas…” His name. The blond’s name. Clear truths that he clung to like a spider to its web.

He murmured them like a mantra, a chant… but it seemed like the pulsing around him was getting stronger, faster, as if it knew he was resisting. The lights pushed and pulled at his eyelids, like they were not enough of a shutter. He found solace and relief in the darkness, trying to cling to the shadows until what felt like sultry fingers brushed across his mind. He knew they were intangible, knew that they couldn’t have existed being as he was all alone. But the shock, the touch was chilling, was enough for his eyes to snap open and a gasp to echo from his lips. Immediately, his eyes locked on the mesmerizing light show, and he fell into their spiraling spell, lips paused halfway between chanting that name… a name?

Did it even matter? He was in an embrace… a warm comforting embrace. Unlike anything he had ever felt before. He was sinking into softness, flying among the clouds, and he was free. Free from everything before, from what had been. He could start anew, find his own way. He wouldn’t be bound by anything. He wouldn’t…

“Axel!”

No more pain. No more sadness. Tears were a thing of the past. What was the past? A brilliant light, shining and dancing that eased his heart and aching soul.

“Dammit, you bastard! You promised!”

Promise? He was a child, born and eager to greet the world. He knew nothing, nobody. He didn’t make promises.

“Axel!” But that voice, it was piercing. It reverberated through him like some fierce instrument, and it was vaguely familiar as well. He knew that voice. He would… miss him? Metal, fire-warmed metal with a grip, spinning and flames.

What?”

“Axel! I know you can hear us!” Two voices now, but they were like echoes, one merely milliseconds after the other. And who was Axel? “If you give in now… I’ll never forgive you, Axel!”

That’s right. He made a promise. To someone… to ocean-blue eyes… and Axel, that was him. He was Axel!

His eyes shot open, and he gasped, his entire body managing to heave upwards, moving past the numbness that the warm water had infected him with. Hands scrabbled at the metal along the side, fingernails scraping and finding no purchase as his memories returned and the voices became recognizable.

Roxas! And someone else, much like the blond, nearly a shadow of him, but the name escaped him. He couldn’t forget! He couldn’t start over! He wasn’t through with the first life. Axel gritted his teeth, firmly closing his eyes against the lights, which seemed to quail in fear at his determination. His hands closed into fists, and he sought to even his breathing as he chanted over and over in his head the only words that meant anything to him.

He didn’t know exactly who Roxas was. He didn’t know their relationship, but he would be damned if he let someone take any opportunity away from him!

The vibrating of the water seemed to slow, pulling back from his body. The chilly grip on his mind recoiled in shock, like he had suddenly lit himself with a fierce flame. He knew nothing but his memories, nothing but that fierce resonant dream to which he clung. It was all he had left.

Suddenly, everything stopped. The lights abruptly vanished, leaving him in the darkness, water gone chill with time. Somewhere during the cleansing, when he had momentarily lost himself, enough time had passed that the warm water had cooled. The humming ceased as well, leaving the water completely still. Yet, feeling returned to his body, that unusual numbness faded so that he mildly thrashed about, annoyed and wanting to be let free of the egg-like chamber.

The water bubbled up beneath him before the level suddenly dropped, leaving Axel flailing about to right himself as the icy water drained away with audible gurgles. His ears and arms now above the seemingly numbing water, he grasped at the side of the smooth metal, struggling to right himself. A faint latching sound could be heard before tiny seams appeared in the cap of the capsule.

A loud pop, and they broke apart, admitting the brilliant light of the Cleansing room. His pupils shrunk so quickly it hurt his head, and he groaned, closing his eyes and holding a hand to his head, tangling among the strands… the very dry strands. Urgh, the whole situation was becoming more and more confusing. Axel looked down as the capsule continued to open with a loud grinding noise, as well as the not-water gurgling away only to realize that he was not wet at all.

He could hear voices murmuring outside the capsule but couldn’t understand what they were saying over the draining liquid. He felt dizzy as well and unnaturally weak, as if he had spent the last week trying to swim over an ocean or something. His mind felt strained, used, pulled through a grinder, and spat back out again to be reformed into something new. But he smiled against all that. Axel still had his memories. He was still Axel.

When the last of the liquid gurgled away, another seam appeared vertically in the entire capsule, splitting it completely down the side. It popped and groaned before swinging outwards like a door, causing him to stumble out of it with an audible cry of surprise. He fell to the floor gracelessly, slamming down quite painfully. Before he could utter anything cognizant or even try to push himself up, hands grasped either of his arms and hauled him to his feet. He blinked owlishly in the bright light, wincing at the pain of it.

“How do you feel?” someone questioned, a female he believed. The words sounded sluggish, as if he were hearing them through a film of water or something. He turned towards the speaker, indeed finding a brunette female with big, coke-bottle lenses.

He opened his mouth to speak before shutting it again, answering by way of shaking his head. He didn’t trust his voice at the moment, not with the weakness still assailing his body.

“Do you know who you are?” someone else asked, a male, this time to his other side.

Ah, the test, to see if he kept his memories. Axel made a great show of furrowing his brow, opening and closing his mouth several times before sighing and shaking his head.

“No,” he responded, heaving another depressive sigh. “Sorry.”

Out of the corner of his eye he caught the two, the man and woman, exchanging pleased glances. The lady smiled brightly.

“It’s alright,” she said, directing him away from the capsule and supporting his weakened body. “We’re here to help.”

He resisted the urge to snort aloud at her words. Here to help his ass. He plastered a thankful grin on his face.

“I appreciate it,” Axel said softly. “But I’m so confused…”

As the male laughed brightly, they led him towards what appeared to be a table in the otherwise empty room, excluding the capsule of course. Axel didn’t remember it being there before; then again, the egg-like contraption had captivated all of his attention… and his fear at the time. The table itself was not unusual. Square, flat, with four legs and a small stack of random items atop it.

“We’ll try to explain as best as we are able,” the sandy-haired male expressed with a nod of his head. He gestured broadly to the laboratory around them. “Presently, you are in the Center for New Life on the world of Gaia’s Grotto. It is a paradise of renewal, a place to be free in your brand new being.” It all came off as a lame travel channel pitch, but Axel fought down the urge to groan aloud. He didn’t want to make them suspicious.

Instead, he ooh’ed and aah’ed. “A paradise? Amazing. Why am I here?”

This time, the female responded, giggling almost childishly. “Ah, Ramsus, he likes to wax on so. You, my dear boy,” she said with a tap to his nose, “have been specially chosen for this grand opportunity. You should be very proud of yourself.” She released his arm, forcing him to lean his still surprisingly weary body completely on the taller male that he now knew to be Ramsus.

“Miang, you tease me,” the sandy-haired scientist pouted, shaking his head. “Poor Abarai isn’t going to know what to do about it all.” He tapped his fingers over his chin, and Axel couldn’t help but notice how pale the man was. He was practically translucent.

Suddenly, hands were on Axel’s shoulders, spinning him around until he was looking into the strange sea-green eyes of Ramsus, nearly mesmerized by their intensity. “You, my dear Abarai, are very lucky indeed. After leaving this room, you will have not only a job, but a home as well and a ga-brother.”

“A ga-brother?” he questioned, furrowing his brow. That was one part where he did not have to fake. Vincent had mentioned nothing about a ga-brother.

Ramsus smiled broadly before whirling about the slightly disoriented redhead again. Before he could regain his bearings, an armful of what appeared to be meaningless junk was thrust into Axel’s arms, and he struggled to hold it all. He vaguely recognized cloth and the jingling of metal before Miang gathered his attention with a chortling, throaty laugh.

“You’re new here, right?” she questioned with a wink and a point of her finger directly at him. “So your ga-brother will help you get acquainted. Kind of like a guide or something, I guess you could say. He’ll explain everything to you, so you we don’t have to waste our time. Not that I mind, per se,” she finished with a long and lingering look over his body, her dark skin flushing as she did.

It irritated him.

Ramsus clapped his hands on Axel’s shoulders, nearly squealing in delight. “You’re so lucky,” the male gushed, suspiciously sounding like a fan-girl in that respect. “Ceran’s offered to take you home and introduce you to your ga-brother.”

“Ceran?” he questioned, trying to sound oblivious as he stared in confusion at the pile of pamphlets, clothes, and other assorted items in his hand. He blinked owlishly at the woman, their erratic behavior rankling on his nerves. He had the urge to shove both his chakram down their overly eager throats and had to clench his teeth to keep from doing so.

A wide grin appeared on her face, the perfect image of a mad scientist. “Oh, that’s right!” she chortled with a grating laugh. “You don’t remember. He’s the one that brought you here.” Her brown eyes seemed to sparkle with glee at that thought, as if removing his memories had been the biggest thrill of her life.

Ramsus beamed broadly as well, vigorously nodding his head. “He was the one who suggested both your job and your ga-brother.” Sea green eyes flooded with glitter as he sighed. “He so rarely takes a personal interest in newbies, though I can see the attraction.” This time, it was Ramsus’ eyes that raked over Axel’s form making the scarlet-haired man feel like they thought him their own personal toy.

“Job?” he questioned, hoping to end this little session as quickly possible.

“Oh! That’s right!” Miang exclaimed, pointing a finger in the air before thumbing her chin in thought. “It’s about time you were on your way.” Ramsus began to push Axel towards the door of the council room, enthusiastically guiding. “You know, more people to send onto their new life and everything,” continued the brunette scientist as they neared the door, darting ahead of the two men to open it with a tiny dancing twirl.

“Good luck!” they chirped together in abnormally happy voices before shoving his weary body out the door, it clicking shut with finality behind him. He couldn’t help but stumble over the threshold, unable to catch his balance thanks to the stack of random items in his hand. But a clawed hand shot out and gripped his shoulder, steadying him.

Axel looked up into gratefully familiar crimson eyes, exhaling in relief. A quick scan of the room confirmed his suspicions that the council had departed as well. Once he regained his balance, Vincent stepped back, releasing his shoulders and looking down at him impassively, almost peering as if trying to see if he made it through the cleansing or not.

“What is your most precious memory?” Vincent questioned, getting straight to the point. It was a test, in a way.

The redhead opened his mouth to speak, when the weariness that he had been holding back suddenly attacked him all at once. He faltered, then pitched forward, directly into the comforting and deceptively strong arms of the winged man. When Vincent effortlessly scooped him up, Axel’s head lolled almost bonelessly on his neck, though he clutched at the dark-haired man’s black shirt, trying to force his languid gaze to lock eyes with Vincent.

“Roxas,” he whispered, trying to fight off the sleep that was attacking him relentlessly. “Roxas is… no, he is more than just my precious memory. He is the one that I want to see most.” His hand on Vincent’s shirt tightened further, words from the strange vision that had called him back from the cleansing reverberating in his mind. The last of his statement managed to fall from his lips, even as he sank into the exhaustive oblivion.

“He is… my heart.”

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Ooh, I thought that was a good place to end it.
Please, please, review... feed my review whore of a muse and she'll work double-time to get the next chapter out.
Oh, and I'm curious if anyone can recognize where I got the names Ramsus, Miang, Arisawa, Abarai and Ceran (spelled Seiran in the anime I took it from). They're from three different anime/games.
Thanks everyone for reading. And i'd appreciate any feedback on OOCness, if I have any