Kingdom Hearts Fan Fiction ❯ Just Another Moment ❯ Chapter 5 ( Chapter 5 )

I had sped home and I guess I was lucky the damn law didn't catch me or they would have jailed my ass as a threat to the city. Fuck it…. By the time I got home and had thrown myself into the bed, I guess it was kind of weird to be upset about it. I mean, I'm not a fucking faggot like Xemnas, or Zexion apparently, but it shouldn't have made me this upset. It was done and over with and the bastard wouldn't touch me again. He kissed me when I thought he was drunk, and he was probably just using that damn excuse to take advantage of me, and he did that as a chick too. How was I so stupid to let something like that slide? Seriously…. A guy dressed like a fucking woman? Goddammit! Throwing a pillow across the room didn't help because then I didn't have a pillow to hug. Why did I have to be used like that? That was the worst damn fucking thing about it. That I was used. Played. What the hell kind of friend would do that? I mean, sure he was a nerd and all that and a loser, but I was actually starting to look at him kinda like a friend and he did this. Dammit!

 

It was one thing to be gay, but no bitch or bastard used me like that and made me look like a fucking jackass. No one! I wanted to scream. Then my mom yelled from across the house at me.

 

“Honey, did you clean your car out?” DAMMIT!

 

“No Mom,” I yelled back, annoyed at being interrupted while I sulked. I didn't want anyone bothering me, why didn't people understand that? My door was up, my Do-Not-Disturb was in place and people were still fucking bugging me!

 

“Don't forget to! I know it's raining now—” There was a long pause as Mom took the time to actually try and talk to me in the same room and the door jiggled. “Axel, don't forget. You've been saying you would for weeks and it hasn't been cleaned yet. Your dad's going to need it after he sells the Sedan.” I scoffed, clutching my pillow.

 

“I'll clean it Mom. Jesus Christ…”

 

“Dear, don't use foul language.”

 

“I wasn't!” About to get even more upset, I buried my head under the pillow and pretended not to hear the woman until she went away.

 

I swear to God I wanted to fucking kill someone.

 

 

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Eventually the rain let up and it was near evening. It was pretty nice out, still damp and cool, the sun setting like molten gold dripping down its palate of sky. I went through the trunk first, vacuuming it out and getting rid of any trash. The trunk wasn't really that bad; the floorboards had the most crud in them. It really sucked that Dad had to sell his car. They didn't like to talk about it in front of me, my parents I mean, but I knew what it was about. Our financial state wasn't so hot right now, so dad was selling the car for money. We hadn't even finished making payments on the car, that's how new it was, and the car I drove now was a piece of shit. We needed a damn car; I needed a damn car. But even if I got a job now there's be no way I could get a car for myself that quickly. I'd probably look for one soon, while I could still drive, and maybe it'd be close enough I could walk. Throwing up the door I got everything in the front seats, listening to the vacuum suck up the pieces of crap noisily, slurping and crunching.

 

I finally got to the back seats, hearing peels of thunder in the distance. The sky was still dark, roiling in the distance; no doubt it'd be pouring on my ass again if I didn't finish soon, then the following days would be a hell of a lot colder than they were now; I fancied I could see my breath, an exhaled puff like a thing plume of smoke. I stopped. Whose shit was this? Not mine; I didn't recognize it as Demyx's. Damn, it must have been Zexion's, but was he remiss enough to forget it? I guess in the heat of the moment the fucker had failed to realize I drove off with his stuff. Throwing it on the ground, not particularly caring where or how it landed, I gave more of a shit about how clean the damn car was. Kicking the bag and shirt out of the way I swore loudly.

 

“Goddamn mother fucking bitch faced piece of shit…” It settled to an incoherent mutter and I jabbed the hose between the seats, sucking up little bits of crumbs and God knows what else. By the time I finished vacuuming, the storm was coming back, dripping big wet drops. I managed to get the vacuum back under the safety of the garage. I felt kind of bad for Zexion's stuff; even if he was an asshole it didn't mean I had to ruin all his shit. I dragged it back inside and threw the bag and shirt in my room. It was a small little back pack kinda thing, like a bag really, a messenger bag, plain black, one strap having broke and been sewed back on at least once.

 

The rain picked up, absolutely pummeling the hell outta everything, and thunder drummed like it was a fucking hurricane, but I didn't actually see a whole lotta lightening.

 

“Axel? Axel?!” Mom yelled up the stairs. Goddammit woman, I swear…

 

“What!”

 

“Did you close the garage door?” Fuck no, I wanted to yell back, but didn't.

 

“No!” I shouted back instead, an edge in my voice. Jesus woman, do it yourself… it doesn't take that much damn effort to press a fucking button.

 

“Axel!” she chastised across the damn house. “You know I don't like it when the rain blows in!”

 

“Yeah, sure, what the fuck ever,” I muttered, throwing myself back on the bed. I couldn't do anything in a storm like this. Maybe try playing some video games but Mom would just fuss again. I considered the back pack. Sucked balls to be Zexion right now. Dumping the contents haphazardly onto the floor, I was disappointed to find it was some school notebooks and a change of clothes, the shirt already not in the bag. These were the pants he wore yesterday, and his swim trunks. Shaking my head, I wanted to burn them.

 

Fire was wicked awesome man, and if it wasn't raining I probably would have burned the fuckers in the backyard, buried in the pile of leaves. Damn right I fucking would… Tossing the clothing aside, I flipped through a notebook. There was the homework we had, all neatly done for math on Monday. There were some scribbles in the back, obviously when the guy was bored. The emo always looked like he was paying attention, so I guess it was kinda surprising to see he could get bored. He was no artist, that was for sure. I opened up a note stuck in a pocket of the bag, unfolding its crinkling edges. The handwriting was nice and neat and kind of pretty, but not loopy like girls' handwriting. It was addressed to me. I read it, half horrified. It said he needed to talk to me about the party, about the stuff we sorta talked about earlier. Pissed again, this bitch was definitely getting burned. Jamming his shit bag into the bed, I found my ash tray and struck a match.

 

“Axel?” My mom knocked on the locked door. “What do you want for dinner sweetie?” I watched the paper catch and start to smolder.

 

“Food.” I watched the note curl up and brown, crackling and writhing as it burned down to ashes.

 

 

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Another damn long week I wasn't looking forward to. I had a week left for my project and I didn't want to do it. I know I needed to and I know I'd wait until the very last minute, but it would have been better if I didn't have it to worry about, on top of all the other recent shit that was happening. Arriving at school I expected everything to explode around me, to see people laughing at me and hear people talking shit behind my back and all but it never came. I was just waiting for someone to piss me off just so I could vent, but everyone was pretty cool about everything, and no one knew about me and Zexion. The emo bastard came up to me during lunch asking about his shit he left in my damn car, and I pretended I didn't hear him at first, until Demyx got back from the lunch line and was talking to him about it.

 

“I don't know a thing about your shit,” I replied casually, biting into my sandwich more forcefully, grinding the stupid turkey and the mustard. There was no damn way I could swallow without a swig of milk every time.

 

“Hm….Well, I haven't seen it at my house, since I've done all the cleaning, so I know it's not there. I can check again when I get home,” Demyx offered, brows knit like he was all worked about a change of clothes and a damn book bag.

 

I almost wanted to shake him and yell at him not to bother obsessing over the fucking thing because he wouldn't have it. Zexion chewed his bottom lip and I silently dared him to just try something. He looked kinda exasperated, like he knew I was being stubborn and just didn't want to say anything, but he relented after a moment and shrugged.

 

“Thank you Demyx. I'm sure I'll find it. I probably just misplaced it.” Silently gloating as he left, my sandwich didn't go down any easier as I vented on it, but at least I felt a little better. Besides that I had gotten some kick seeing the disappointment on Mrs. Larkins' face when she saw for once in probably his entire life, Zexion the emo bastard didn't have his homework. Probably would have been better if he freaked out instead of looking so calm and apologizing, but the fact his grade just plummeted like, twenty points for getting a fucking zero in the grade book was worth it.

 

“That's really weird, you know,” Demyx commented, squirting ketchup on the corner of his tray. “I remember seeing him have it when he left.” He frowned.

 

“Yeah well I'm not responsible for his stuff. If he lost in his own damn house why would anyone expect me to know where it is?” I retorted bitterly, tearing into my sandwich again.

 

       “I'm not saying you should, but if you went somewhere with him and make it fell out or something?”  I rolled my eyes.  I didn't want to talk about it, and that was all Demyx wanted to talk about.  When the blondie finally got the hint I was more interested in my food than in talking, he fell silent, glancing up at me like he expected me to look up grinning, just bullshitting him or something, but I didn't. I wasn't interested in that fucking loser, Zexion. Pushing my food around, I couldn't eat the rest of it, too distraught and disturbed for the time being to force anything else down. I let Demyx have my fries and I threw the rest away. He looked at me kinda concerned, but it's not like the poor bastard could have done anything about it. So basically lunch was boring as hell until the very end anyway. I was standing around outside the cafeteria with Demyx, just killing time until the lunch period was over when I noticed Marluxia.

 

The guy was pretty hard to miss, and on such an occasion it was because of his big fucking mouth, but the guy had flaming pink hair, like cotton candy and it was long too. Mine was long, but it was fucking girly. It kinda flipped out on the sides and fell about to his shoulders and he was always flipping it over his shoulder or sometimes in people's faces. It pissed me the fuck off, but right now I was actually pretty amused. Marluxia was talking to Zexion. I was lucky no one else in the damn school knew about me and Zexion, but I was still pretty damn paranoid.

 

“Zexion, I'm not so sure you're aware who I am,” Marluxia purred, rather loudly.

 

“You're Marluxia, considered the school's `pimp.' Your class rank is number eleven, which you enjoy flaunting. You freak out if you don't have your cherry lip gloss, and you're also widely considered a bully around Century Public.” My scowl matched Marluxia's, but neither of ours lasted long.

 

I edged closer to see what was going on.

 

“Cheeky,” the pink haired guy smirked sardonically and stepped closer, imposingly. “I'm glad you can get away with it somewhere, Zexion. I know it's not approved at your….house. And I think if you ever admitted such a thing to a teacher they might faint.” He scoffed. “But bad boys need punishing.” Several people around Marluxia giggled, and one encouraged for him to “Do it!” I didn't know what they were talking about, but I was rather intrigued. Just what did the pretty boy plan on doing? The bell rang and I watched Marluxia stare Zexion down with a cunning smirk. He didn't need a reason to antagonize anyone, but it would be interesting to know what he might do. The flower boy could be pretty damn merciless.

 

Well, study hall went by pretty much without any hitches. I avoided Zexion the best I could, but dammit, the emo fucker had a way of getting on people's nerves without even trying. He wasn't really doing anything, just sitting around, reading or studying or what the fuck ever. I hung out with Roxas and Demyx, talking in low voices so no one yelled at us. I might have napped, but I was still too riled for one. Roxas turned out to be a pretty funny guy though, so it eased my mind from all the turmoil and shit that went on.

 

“Are you kidding, his sister's a total babe!” I hissed with a wicked grin. Demyx blushed up to the ears.

 

“She's my sister Axel… that's really weird to hear about her.” I snickered.

 

“Look for yourself.” Producing a picture of Demyx with his sister that was a couple years old, Roxas looked at him, considering it quietly a moment.

 

“Axel…. I still don't know where you found that or how you got it,” Demyx lamented, fingers twitching to snatch it away, but I did before he was able to.

 

“She is kinda cute,” Roxas muttered, looking to Demyx with a silly little smile and I clapped him on the back.

 

“Damn right she is!”

 

“Shhhh!”

 

“Sorry.” I glared over my shoulder at the girl who told me to hush. She had dark hair, straight as a board, and was very plain—definitely not my type at all…. Dumb bitch…didn't know who she was messing with apparently.

 

“Anyway, how far have you gotten on Professor Vexen's science project?” Roxas inquired, leaning back on the side of his desk, feet taking up as much space between the desks as possible, but we sat at the back, so it wasn't like anyone would actually come back here.

 

“Shit….” I groaned. “Well…. About half of it. All the fucking research anyway. I still have to do all the replicas and whatever.” Roxas grimaced.

 

“Oh yeah….. I'm almost finished.” I snorted. I hadn't known the kid that long, but I was willing to bet he had finished already and was just being modest. The rest of study hall was pretty much boring as hell, but it was better than doing work anyway. Zexion kept looking over at me, and I could feel his damn gaze on me, but every time I glared over my shoulder he was reading his damn book or his notes, or what the fuck ever.

 

We didn't do a hell of a lot in biology either except take notes and listen to Professor Vexen talk and talk. Things didn't get interesting until I was on my way to the car after school. There was a group of people not too far from where I was parked, near the edge of campus but where everyone could see it. The emo, Zexion, was in the middle, Marluxia and some of his posse harassing him. My ears perked up in interest and I closed my car door to listen in on it, to see what would happen. The school pimp, his pink hair looking a little extra fluffy this afternoon in the sporadic breeze, placed his arm casually though no doubt dangerous around the emo's narrow shoulders. He wore an evil kind of smirk.

 

“Zexion…. I like you. You're a pretty good guy, and I'll even let what happened at lunch slip. You just have to tell me the answer I want to hear.” I could see the pout on Zexion's face, the serious look of offense in dark eyes.

 

“I'm not dating you for any reason, Marluxia. You asked me a week ago and I said no. My answer's not going to change.” The posse booed and shifted closer. Date Marluxia? What the fuck kinda shit was that?

 

I could see Marluxia holding on a little tighter to his shoulder, saying something in his ear, and the emo's eyes went wide with shock or fear, and Zexion shoved the prick away from him.

 

“I know what you're doing, Marluxia,” Zexion half spat, voice firm and threatening, his whole posture ready to jump the bastard in front of him. It was surprising that quiet timid Zexion was a fighter, but I guess if I thought about it, it wasn't that much of a surprise. Considering the place he lived I could probably bet he never had a very comfortable life, but what the hell did I know? Marluxia just kinda laughed at it, stepping imposingly close, but whatever he was doing didn't impress or daunt the emo.

 

“You're smart Zexion, I wouldn't put it past you, but you just made your life miserable. I know enough about you and what you've done to get the whole school talking. I don't really need you to get what I want, but I thought I would be the gentleman and not make a mess of things.” I rolled my eyes. Gentleman my ass. Zexion crossed his arms, looking bored.

 

“Marluxia,” he attempted to reason, and I had to lean way forward on someone else's car to hear. A few other people stopped to watch and listen, some of them whispering, most of them not about to go near the pink haired pimp. “Normally I'm sure people are afraid of you and if they stand up to you once, they won't again. But I'm not going to fall for your bull and I really don't care. Say whatever you want to Marluxia. If people want to talk, they'll talk all they want. It won't affect my grades or study habits any, and that's what I'm here for.”

 

I snickered. Sure you had to come to school to establish some sort of academia, but it was still damn amusing to hear the emo fighting like that; he wouldn't get very far as long as Marluxia was concerned.

 

“I think we'll see about that,” Marluxia half snarled, grabbing Zexion by the chin. I thought the emo was about to punch him, but if he was he restrained himself in his moment of anger. Marluxia said something else but the wind picked up and it was too low to hear. It looked like Zexion would bite him or something, the way he glared, which was kinda funny. Getting into my car, I thought it was over, but when I backed out and was starting to pull past them Marluxia had stepped back and his posse were `taking care of business,' easily outnumbering him. I idled long enough to see Zexion slip out of one guy's grip, knee him in the stomach and elbow his nose. Blood automatically gushed everywhere like he had just turned on the faucet in his face. Everyone else was unfazed but is made that bastard mad as hell, and I didn't blame him. I felt kinda sorry that Zexion was getting the crap beat out of him. More people were drawn to the fight to watch silently, keeping their distance. The emo was a good fighter but when I saw him look up at me with big dark eyes he just kinda… gave up.

 

Zexion probably could have beaten the hell out of all those guys. I had once before, but there had only been three of them then, not five. Of course, I was good enough I could take all five of them on at once, but I wasn't about to help the bastard that had played my ass like a fucking retard, dressing like a girl and kissing me like that. Hell no! Zexion deserved it. He looked at me again, an eye bruised, hair grabbed by at least one hand and I smirked and shrugged before he was kneed in the face. I drove off, thinking about the whole thing and wondering if I had been in the group what I might have done. When I thought about the party at Xigbar's place I wanted to punch the fuck out of him sometimes…. But I wasn't really that violent. It would have been fun to toss Zexion around a little, but once I had gotten home I was thinking more about why the hell Zexion did it in the first place. Was he fucking queer? I had my suspicions, and I was almost positive, but that's not something you just fucking ask a guy. Besides that, I didn't want to know, and right not I didn't want to have anything to do with the emo. So I went up to my room with a snack and stretched out on my bed and turned my stereo up to daydream about what I'd do this weekend.

 

 

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I still had my fucking project to finish, and I wasn't looking forward to it. I only had a few more days to finish it, but despite all the work I had already done, I wasn't eager to finish the rest of it. Bastard teachers… how could they do this to the students?! But this was Professor Vexen, and honestly, a project like this was the least of my worries—compared to his labs and shit anyway. Sitting on my bed, staring at the damn paper….staring at the damn paper, sitting on my bed. Nothing was getting done and I felt burnt out. Then my mom was yelling up the stairs at me.

 

“Axel!” she called. I groaned.

 

“What?!” I snapped back, glad to have a chance to raise my voice. Better not complain about me either because I was pissed and that's the last thing I needed. “The phone's for you, dear. A friend from school!” If it was Demyx I was gonna kill the guy. I loved him like a brother but it wasn't like he had anything important to say, probably.

 

“Got it Mom!” Stumbling out of my room, kicking a pillow out of the way, I grabbed the phone in the hall and stuck it to my ear.

 

“Hello?” I had to be polite until my mom hung up; I heard the click when she did and then, “What the hell do you want?”

 

“Axel?” the voice questioned, soft and a bit annoyed. “This is Zexion.” Oh, the faggot wanted to talk to me. What the fuck did he want, calling me like everything was okay? I was still sore about the whole stunt he pulled dressing like some woman and playing me for a jackass, but since Zexion had the hell beaten outta him earlier this week I was feeling a little better. Probably wasn't the best thing to admit but it was true.

 

“Yeah, great. So what?” There was a long pause.

 

“Are you still upset over the whole damn thing?” I'd never heard him swear before. I was a little shocked at first, but his hostility spurred me on too.

 

“Fucking bastard, why the hell shouldn't I be? You were dressed like a fucking chick, hitting on me, and making me look like a Goddamn idiot!” I hissed vehemently, keeping my voice down unless I wanted my mom knocking and asking me what I was saying and to who and all that bullshit.

 

“What, are you gonna be a pussy and whine the whole time, Axel? You're the one acting like a prepubescent girl. Come on, it was a joke okay? I'm sorry I did that, I've apologized already.”

 

Stubbornly I about took the phone and chucked it across the room into the wall. My pride got in the way and why shouldn't it? I was inhumanely awesome that way: I could forgive him for something like that, and wasn't it better anyway? I should just get over it, since it was way the hell in the past now and Zexion had more or less repented for it, even if it hadn't been at my hands.

 

“Then what the fuck did you call for?” I harped bitterly, still not wanting to cave in and tell Zexion he was right and accept his apology.

 

“I wanted to know if you could help me work on my anatomy project.” It was my turn to be silent now.

 

“You need help?” I couldn't hold back the chuckle.

 

“Well, I thought it would be easier if two people worked on it. You know, figure out what to do and make it easier for each other. Do you want to come over tomorrow or not?” I grinned devilishly. He had just given me my opening and I'd fucking jump all over that chance to take it. “Sure, yeah that sounds fine. Look Zexion, I'm sorry for all the hard feelings. It just….really freaked me out to have a guy doing that to me, ya know?” I could almost hear Zexion smiling through the mouthpiece.

 

“Yeah. Hey, it looks like it's going to be all day for me. Could you get here around noon, I guess?”

 

I laughed. “Yeah, if you still live in that shack you call a home.” There was silence. “It was a joke Zexion.”

 

“I need to go. Bye.”

 

“See you tomorrow.” A click and he hung up. That was abrupt and a bit unsettling, and maybe if I had thought about it I would have seen it as a damn clue, but I didn't. I didn't think about it until it was after it was too late anyway.

 

 

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So my Friday hadn't gone that great, and I sorta kinda started the rest of my project a little, but it was a no-go, so I temporarily gave it up and waited for when I'd visit Zexion tomorrow. I was lying on bed that night, hugging my pillow, a bit too cool to be in just boxers but I didn't give a damn, and I was thinking why Zexion would want me over. I was feeling kinda bad for all the shit he went through at school and he was pretty sincere in his apologies—not to mention pretty persistent. I mused, too, if maybe something was going on, or if he was just busy. I figured all he did was study, but he had hung up so fast….maybe he was afraid I'd reject him so he wouldn't give me a chance to say no? Or maybe the meatloaf was burning. I laughed to think that emo kid could cook.

 

Even so that bastard played a pretty sick trick on me, but that had been a little while ago, and even Demyx had said not to linger so much on it. So my Friday had passed and I didn't sleep too great, but what the hell could I do about it? It was Saturday now and I had been wandering around the house some during the morning. I woke up pretty early—early for Saturday especially—and my parents had left for work already. My car was still there, so luckily my dad hadn't given up the other one just yet. I took my car out early, just killing some time, hanging around the drug store because I had nothing better to do than order a sandwich and watch the people fill orders for medications most of which people didn't even need, I would bet.

 

I played fantasies where I would be working behind that carefully paneled desk, protected with some type of heavy plastic, and I would be working overtime, real busy, and like, Zexion would come in for something and I'd scribble some illegible shit out and smile all nice at him. Then, I'd fill the order real quick and hand it to him and tell him to have a nice day. I'd watch him take it and freak out when he found I filled him the wrong order, but he couldn't do anything about it because there was a heavy panel of plastic between us, and I'd tell him, I'd say, “Oh I'm sorry Mr. Zexion, I thought this was an order of birth control for your mother, it wasn't even written out to you.” Then I'd point at the scribbles and he couldn't do anything about it. I laughed to myself as I ate, kicking my feet on the bench and eventually I was asked to leave, so I did. I was finished with my food anyway.

 

Heading to Zexion's, I passed the time jamming with the radio, half flying through whatever piece of shit he considered a driveway. My speakers blared, and I just daring someone from that emo's shack to come out and complain to me about it. But no one did and I saw Zexion stand up from his steps and greet me.

 

“Hello Axel. I take it the drive wasn't so bad?” he smiled meekly, carefully trying to pull his bangs out of his face and failing miserably. I just shrugged. He still wore some bruises from earlier this week, but he was healing pretty well and didn't look too bad. I didn't bother commenting about it though.

 

“Nah, just kind of boring. Least the tunes were pretty good.” I pulled my shit out of the backseat and looked at Zexion for a moment, and right when I was going to ask him what the hell we were standing around for because the homework wouldn't finish itself, he turned and led me into the place he called a home, pausing in the doorway like he didn't really want me to come in but would let me in anyway.

 

I didn't know whether I should be surprised or not; the place was trying to hold a landslide back with a sheet of tinfoil, an attempts at cleaning apparent, but floundering like some gasping fish that refused to give up. There was some definition of order in there, but I didn't know where to find it. I guess the inside wasn't really any different from the outside, but I wasn't really expecting it to be a dump. It fit the emo's personality to say the least but I had one word for it: Goddamn!

 

“You can come to my room, we'll work there.” Nodding, I followed him, stepping around a broken coffee table that didn't look any more than a piece of half assed stained wood held up by beaten and chewed up table legs, one of them broken and duct taped back on, though it leaned heavily at an awkward angle. The floor was relatively clear, a path made to the places which were used more frequently—namely the bathroom, fridge, and couch. There was another room, maybe his parents, but I didn't hear anyone else, and I was actually relieved when Zexion told me we were alone; I didn't think I wanted to meet his parents, or whatever crack heads that raised him.

 

Opening his door, it didn't seem intact since he leaned it back into place, closing it behind us. His room was small, like everything else. A pile of clothes in one corner served as a dresser; a mattress for a bed with a sheet thrown over it; a small shelf used to hold books and school supplies; a closed box in the corner for personal belongings maybe; and a charger for a phone. The floor was cleared, the walls peeled in place, devoid of pictures, though when I squinted my eyes hard I could see something written and bleached off the wall. Zexion distracted me before I could read it.

 

“I know it's not much, but it will be quiet all day and there should be room to work.” He looked a little sheepish… no that wasn't the word… more like, he just didn't want to be here at all, like he didn't want anyone else to know this was where he lived.

 

“Cool place,” I commented casually, just trying to be amiable, but the bastard shot it down.

 

“Not really.” Zexion sat on his bed and brushed his bangs out of the way but it fell into his face again.

 

“Did you start anything with it?” I asked, sitting on the floor, which seemed like a bad idea considering the state of the carpet. Thin though it was, it was severely stained with unmentionable—who knows what!—fluids or foods or something.

 

It was as though it had been stained and washed out, but the fibers were permanently dyed. It would work well enough.

 

“Well, just ideas really and how to work with them. I didn't know if you had anything in mind for yours, but I figured I'd work with construction paper or something.” Cheeks tinged pink with a blush and I grinned. It was funny that he was embarrassed, and hell, I didn't care if I was in high school and still doing arts and crafts with glue and colored paper.

 

“Well fuck me, I don't care.” Zexion looked up sharply, eyes wide, wondering, though easily obscured from relaying any information. “I can't draw worth shit, but it's better than what I could start, I guess. I don't know what the hell I'm doing.” Zexion smiled timidly. He reached over and carefully selected a little booklet from his shelf, opening it. It had his stack of work under the cover of colored paper which he spread out, all his typing set aside. From beneath his mattress he pulled out poster board. I hadn't thought to bring any supplies with me, if I could have fished some up, but I didn't lament it or anything, if Zexion was going to think ahead and it's not like he told me on the phone or anything.

 

For a moment I wondered why I was here, why I was working with Zexion, but he confirmed it by pulling a book off his shelf, a heavy book, the spine torn off. Flipping to a marked section I glanced over to find it was a book of anatomy, or at least contained pictures of the human body and all its organs.

 

“We're supposed to try and emulate this shit on paper?” I complained, looking at the complex parts of a kidney, in which I had to stare hard at the tiny print, and even then I couldn't pronounce the names, let alone if I was spelling them correctly. Zexion laid the book on the floor and carefully situated himself, brushing bangs out of the way again. Long sleeves reached the palm of his hands, just screaming emo, and he looked over and smiled. For a moment I couldn't help but stare at lip, meticulously and delicately turned up in the corners, shy but genuine, something he obviously didn't practice often—not like this anyway.

 

“I can read anything you can't, so don't worry about it. You can copy my labels.” Staring at him for a long second, I grinned and chuckled.

 

“If I can read your damn handwriting.” I grinned and picked up the book, bringing it up to stare at one of the words. “What the hell is a `duo…..den-em?” Zexion smirked, his way of laughing, perhaps and half took the book away, scooting closer.

 

“The duodenum—” he pronounced it `do-odd-en-um,' “is the beginning part of the small intestines which helps with digestion and regulates how often the stomach empties itself—”

 

“Hold it!” I interrupted. “If I'm only replicating the things I don't need to know all the information; just what it looks like and where the hell I can find it.” I half snapped. I didn't need him pissing me off; I was still sore about him pretending to be a girl. I mean, it wasn't that weird or anything, because Marluxia, despite being the school pimp, was a pretty girly guy. He just didn't usually wear skirts or anything like that. Part of the fact was that it had happened so long ago. I wasn't that intent about holding grudges or anything either. The emo had been shitting the hell out of me with it, but it took much energy to hold a grudge, so right now it was more like a truce and even if I had forgiven him, I was still pretty sore. Sucking in a breath, eyes flickered towards Zexion but he was just looking through the book like he was still reading, so I went back to looking at what I had. Pulling Zexion's supplies towards me, we worked in silence for a long while, not saying too much unless I had to find something or unless anything needed to be said, “Pass the scissors,” “I need more paper,” “Where's the fucking glue?”

 

So it went on for awhile and I was happily pasting my fake organs together in the vague shape of a human.

 

“Here,” Zexion offered me, “I accidentally cut out two.” He was offering me an orange stomach, shaped pretty much like a stomach and better than I could have done. The emo was somehow meticulously cutting out each fucking piece and he was still an organ ahead of me. Looking at the stomach for a moment I finally took it, reluctantly plucking it from slender pale fingers and begrudgingly placing it at the end of the cardiac sphincter. It was a little too big so I had to trim it, but it still looked okay. Zexion seemed happy, which was odd because he didn't offer a damn smile or anything. Focusing back on my human body, I groaned at the thought of cutting out all the intestines. I noticed the duodenum was there, the first part after the duodenal bulb at the end of the stomach. Fucking emo kid.

 

I was halfway through my person without a hitch—halfway being that I had all my organs and bones pasted in the shape of a lumpy human body, and still had to make a replica of muscles and draw with all the major arteries and veins. So I was like, halfway through and my brain was about to explode from all the information that filtered through one ear and out the other like a bizarre strainer, when Zexion stood and stretched. I stretched too, laying all over his bed and groaning as muscles I hadn't moved in awhile pulled and protested. I think I remembered a couple of them, but I wasn't about to try to recall which ones were too sore right now. Zexion's shirt rode up as he twisted and turned and touched his toes and all that. A thought passed my mind that while he wasn't too great with physical education, he was kinda flexible, but it made the emo look even more a girl.

 

“How about a break?” he offered, speaking softly, the first thing he had really said in a long while.

 

“Yeah,” I agreed. “I'm taking one whether you like it or not.” Fuck if I cared if he was taking a break or not; I didn't have to work on his schedule.

 

Zexion looked down at me a moment and I was about to glare heatedly about what the hell did he think he was fucking staring at when he spoke again.

“What do you want to drink? I have Miller and Coors.” I perked up a bit.

 

“Got High Life?” He nodded once and turned to leave. Cocking my brows, I decided I could forgive him a little if he was going to offer me a beer. Sitting back on his bed, feet rocking back and forth, I reclined and stretched out, staring at the ceiling, cracked right through the middle where it veered to one side. I wondered what it was from, but I wasn't pondering too long before Zexion returned, two beers in each hand. He had Coors for him and Miller for me. Smirking, I took one and cracked it, taking a deep swig and ending with a grateful sigh. Zexion opened his as well, and only sipped it. I snickered and shook my head.

 

Still standing, he quirked a single brow at me, then overturned and chugged the damn thing. Laughing, I couldn't contain myself, even if I wanted to. He belched.

 

“Damn. I didn't think you were capable of holding your beer like that.” I held my bottle up in cheers and Zexion just shrugged. Now that the mood was easier and lighter, things went faster and I could finish more. Zexion drank his second beer slower and I steadily made my way through both though I finished first; the emo might have been ahead of me as far as the cutting and pasting went, but I was still a champion in drinking and I can tell ya, I can hold my alcohol—besides that, two was hardly a warm up. I wouldn't drink Zexion out of house and home unless he offered. The hardest damn part was working on the system of arteries and veins. They were so fucking small and hard to follow too, even though they were color-coded.

 

I was actually surprised when Zexion turned the lights on in his room; it had gotten dark without me noticing and hours had passed already. How did that happen? Well, it was a damn good thing I had decided to work early on this, but at least I'd have plenty of time afterwards. Stretching again and standing, pacing around the room, I was nearly finished, just having to label all the shit. Zexion finished with a small scratch of his name on the poster and cracked his knuckles, sitting back. A small smile was offered.

 

“What the fuck now? I'm starving….” I kicked half heartedly at my poster, not wanting to actually damage it, but so fucking tired of staring at the damn thing. So I shifted and looked back to Zexion for some answer. Should I ask if he even had food or not?

 

“We can get something to eat,” the emo assured, brushing his dark bangs away from his eyes where they promptly fell into place once more.

 

“Shit… what have you got?” Following the other out with a small beckon, he traversed the length of his shit hole of a trailer to the fridge, dingy and stained but with edible looking food inside. Zexion pulled out a couple boxed dinners to microwave.

 

After a quick and relatively silent dinner I finished my labeling and looked over the poster to make sure I had everything. Zexion was cleaning up, putting everything back in place, pulling a box with something inside, the same one I had seen earlier that I couldn't tell what was in it. Curling my poster up and paper clipping both ends, I sighed and ran a hand through my hair, ready to get the hell out of there and get home. I wanted a hot shower and a good damn sleep; my brain was overloaded with information I'd never be able to retain for very long. Unfortunately I didn't get home until much later than I expected. The emo flipped the fucking lights off. I heard a click.

 

“What the fuck—!” I began before my wrists were twisted around. I couldn't start to struggle until I hit the mattress, but Zexion had the element of surprise and already had me pinned with his full weight. He wasn't that heavy, but it was a bitch to throw off. Damn stubborn and pretty strong for as small as he was, my face was pressed into a pillow.

 

I thought he was attempting to suffocate me and I thrashed and wiggled and bucked to throw him off, gasping for a breath as I was flipped onto my back I felt him managing to twine his legs around mine to keep a hold and felt a cold bite of metal…..handcuffs?! What the fuck was going on?! It was damn bad enough that he had played me off the other week, but this was not the way to get on my good side.

 

“What the hell?” I bit out once I was able to struggle onto my back. Zexion had let me up and my hands were cuffed.

 

“Scream as loud as you want,” the emo fucker said softly, amusedly. “No one can hear you out here.” It was true. I'm pretty no one else lived around where he did, so unless someone was walking by, I wouldn't be heard. I gulped, trying my hardest not to panic. The situation wasn't that bad yet.

 

“What the fuck are you doing Zexion?!” I growled threateningly, but he only smiled a little bit. I couldn't see it, but I could hear it in his voice.

 

“Tying you up, so you won't run away.” I couldn't really punch him with both hands, and he only needed to pin one to have them both pinned. I felt a rope of some kind pull and twist around the chains between the cuffs, securing me to something. Tugging and jerking, I only managed to hurt myself.

 

“Save the struggling for when I take you. It'll feel better that way.” I stuttered before a stream of curses left my mouth.

 

“Fucking bastard…..” What the hell was he doing? “Son a goddamn fucking bitch…” What the hell was he doing?! I could feel a cool hand pushing my shirt up and I paled at the touch, wiggling and trying to kick or throw Zexion off. I managed to knee him hard enough in the liver that he was half thrown sideways, but he was damn persistent. We wrestled for long moments while bumping into who knew the hell what, banging elbows and tearing up my wrists. I growled and spat and cursed and kicked. Several times I heard and felt the hard smack of flesh as I meant with some body part or other. I couldn't bite or I might have, I couldn't punch or scratch, but if I had to knock the fucker unconscious I would. But I could only fight so long, and my adrenaline was starting to ebb away. God fucking dammit to hell and back. Truly panicked because I had fucking lost to the bastard who was already somewhat wounded before I had started fighting him, I froze up. What was he going to do to me? Moreover, why the hell was he doing this?!

 

It took a moment to find my breath.

 

“Zexion,” I hissed hoarsely. “Why the hell are you doing… this? What the fuck is this for?” There was silence for a long moment.

 

“Because I like you, Axel. I want you.” I could hear a kinda longing sound in his voice. I wiggled to try and throw him off, but I was tired and he was sitting on my legs.

 

“Dammit Zexion…. If you really like me you wouldn't fucking tie me up like this. People are supposed to talk about this kind thing.”

 

“What were you planning?” he cut in, suddenly very serious. “I realize what I did at Xigbar's party didn't go so well because you found out. I suppose it was inevitable that you might have. But I do like you, Axel. I do want you.” There was a long pause, then a soft sigh. “You can here for a little vengeance of your own. Why else would you really come here? I don't feel like you'd go too far since you're a pretty good guy. But I wounded your ego.”

 

“The fuck are you blabbering about?!”

 

“It's true isn't it?” I felt a finger run down my chest. “I suppose what Marluxia did was some compensation right? But I don't care whether it was or not, that's for a completely different reason.”

 

“Goddammit Zexion let me go!” I struggled again, but it didn't last too long. I was scared but my adrenaline could only do so much.

 

“Axel…” I could feel warm breath on my cheek. “You wanted me when you thought I was a girl…I know it's different for you now… but if I don't have any chances…” I felt his lips brush over my cheek and tensed up, wanting to thrash around, but hardly having the strength to now. My body felt weak and scared and I couldn't move. Swallowing hard I decided to do my best to ignore it and not act at all. Maybe he'd leave me alone. But it was a far cry for any hope.

 

“Maybe there is a small chance to rebuild things and maybe I'm taking the wrong approach. But to think you'd never want me…. That you'd find a girlfriend and I wouldn't even be considered.” I felt teeth and tensed up. “If this is my only chance, Axel, I'm taking it. I went to the party to try to attract you but even in the end I'm not going to be someone else for you. This is who I am, Axel. I want you.” There was a mouth on my neck and I wiggled again, gritting my teeth and trying my damnedest not to panic too much or explode or something. I had no idea what his line of reasoning was. Maybe he wanted some kind of one night stand or something…. If he had me where I was and that was it, maybe we could make some kind of compromise. But if he was going to stalk me or something there was no way in hell I would allow it.

 

“Stop….!” I was stubbornly fighting the odd sensation of having my neck sucked and bit on. None of the girls I had been with had ever done that. But as much as I was wanted I could be picky about my girls; I wasn't going to let just any broad do whatever she wanted to me. A hand rubbed over my belly to my chest, fingers tickling skin and finding a nipple to pinch. Bucking to throw Zexion off, I couldn't get away from the fingers no matter how much I twisted and squirmed. Growling in protest I tried to work my legs the best I could to kick him off, but there was no such luck, not when he was sitting on me. He heard him groan and his hand moved, thankfully, but its direction south wasn't any better. Crying out in surprise when he grabbed me, I whine and bucked again—an action that only made it worse. I was swearing at my body with every colorful word I could think of not to get aroused just because someone was groping me, but my body betrayed me as it grew hotter, harder. I wasn't attracted to guys, Goddammit! Starting to swear again, I heard a soft laugh.

 

“I love hearing you talk dirty,” Zexion purred, which immediately made me stop. There was no way I could win, and the more it dawned on me, the more I gave up. “Good boy,” I was lauded, cheeks burning with shame.

 

But even trying to do nothing failed. My body reacted to Zexion, and I couldn't stifle all my noises of surprise. His mouth covered the nipple he hadn't harassed yet, biting and lapping, while his hands tugged down my pants enough. I had a sliver of hope, aiming to get in a good kick when he was more absorbed in taking off my clothes, but that was quickly dashed like all my other hopes had been. Zexion fondled my naked flesh, groaning enticingly, fingers teasing and making me hard. I shuddered at the feeling and was helpless when he did pull my pants off, moving to settle between my legs. I had no heart to fight back anymore, even when he paused to remove his own shirt. My last attempt at freedom was tugging on the handcuffs in hope I could slip my hands through, but I'd sooner skin myself than actually free myself. I was damn scared now because I knew what Zexion was going to do… Dammit I didn't even want revenge for his stupid fucking escapade earlier, I just wanted this to be some crazy ass nightmare or something, but it wasn't, and no matter how hard I wished it wasn't real, I could feel how real it was.

 

Zexion kept murmuring and purring stuff in my ear but I wasn't listening to him. As much as I struggled and swore and screamed when I felt a burst of adrenaline, I couldn't escape and Zexion wouldn't let me and dammit I couldn't get in a good kick or anything either. I was only half aware of what was going on by the time I gave up completely. I had heard the sound of a cap opening a closing and felt something wet on my ass and I started struggling and swearing again, but Zexion would sit back and wait until I was done and soon I was just exhausted. In the end the fucker won and I felt fingers probing me, buried up my ass and stretching me. It didn't exactly hurt but it felt damn weird and shameful and I hated it. My eyes burned with unshed tears, but I didn't want to feel like some weak pussy and cry, or give the bastard the satisfaction of hearing or potentially seeing me cry either. It was weird to feel hands caressing and stroking me, over a belly or thighs, sometimes my face, and I'd try to wiggle away but to no avail.

 

So I ended up laying there and praying it would go by faster because there was no damn way out of it anyway. I cried out and whimpered and swore and struggled, jerking on the handcuffs when I felt what could only be Zexion's dick rubbing against my ass, but my hips were forced down until he had penetrated me. Gritting my teeth, I wanted to cry even more, feeling completely defeated. It stung like hell and it felt bizarre and uncomfortable to have something up my ass…. But the hand stroking me almost seemed merciful because the pleasure started distracting me. Head lolling to the side I wished I had passed out at least. I can remember the feeling of Zexion thrusting into me and making me whimper now and then, emotions fluctuating between pure shame, anger, and despair, and every now and then that resignation that made me not care, but it felt good so it wasn't that bad… those moments were few and far between and I hated them. I hated Zexion and I swore I'd get revenge, even if I had to mow the fucker down in my car at school.

 

As much as I hated it, I still climaxed all over Zexion's hand. It was kinda hard to avoid when he was stimulating me so much, even if I was being raped. As a guy, when it comes to your dick, there's no turning back. Maybe if Zexion had been a complete prick and was only interested in himself he wouldn't have bothered with me; I wouldn't have had to put up with the pleasure and that's what I hated the most: that the fucking emo kid could handle me like that and make it feel good. He had kind of feminine hands, but he was good at what he was doing to me. I wondered if he had a lot of practice or if he was just doing this because he liked me. Zexion came after I did and holy shit I don't want to ever feeling a fucking guy, fucking me in the ass, and ejaculating inside of my damn body. It was way too fucking weird for me. But the emo cried out and moaned kinda girlishly, kinda like the way he moaned when I had been at Xigbar's party only it was more throaty this time, raw with lust and desire.

 

Once all the pleasure had ebbed away, I was acutely aware of how much my ass hurt, both before and after the bastard pulled out. I was even more aware though when he pulled out that nasty fluids were dripping from places they shouldn't have, and I was aware how much my wrists hurt too. I think I had been holding my breath the whole time because I let it out shakily, and I'll be damned if I heard a sigh of contentment from Zexion. Unmoving for a moment, the emo finally shifted and left—I saw the door open and let in some of the light from the rest of the house, but he returned in a moment. Instead of turning the lights on, Zexion flipped on a flash light and stood it on its end like some weird light. I didn't want to look at him, and I glared because there was nothing else to really look at. I wanted him to know and feel how much I hated his guts right then, how much I was going to strangle his ass just as soon as I was free.

 

Holding a warm wet cloth he washed me up first, wiping off my belly carefully and fondling me. I growled but it sounded strange, as hoarse as I was by now. Zexion only smiled faintly, timidly and cleaned up the rest of me. I was damn sore as it was already, but he was surprising gently, which I was finding out. Despite everything he had done and how much of my life he was ruining, he wasn't really being an asshole about it; he wasn't treating me like an object or toy, and he wasn't being rough. It was like he had some damn consideration for me, which I don't know how that worked, seeing as he just finished raping me. I felt clammy and nauseas, trembling a little bit—I'd say in rage, but really I was just shaken. Zexion kissed me and with an embarrassing whimper I tried to turn away but he held me still and kept kissing me, coaxing me to open a mouth for him. Now, I had kissed Zexion before not knowing it was him, and this time it wasn't that much different. I mean, when I thought the fucker was a girl it was the same as knowing he was a guy now. It was still soft and warm and kinda nice, and the bastard was actually a pretty good kisser. I could have given him a few tips of course, but sure as hell not after all this shit.

 

When the emo pulled back he brushed a hand over my cheek. I wasn't a fucking girl and I didn't need any comfort and I sure as hell didn't want to stay naked and chained to this asshole's bed. I think he finally got the fucking drift because he carefully untied the rope securing the handcuffs…. Or whatever he used to tie me up. I started to glower.

 

“Are you okay?” he inquired softly. Am I okay? Am I okay? Am I really fucking okay? I almost laughed at the stupid question. What kind of sorry ass question was it anyway? “I mean…. I can tell you're a virgin and all and I know it's not something you'd be that used to, but I wasn't too rough was I?” What the fuck? Was this all about Zexion all of a sudden? But I was too pissed to really say anything.

 

“Hold on and let me wash this out.” He had washed himself off with the cloth and left the room to rinse it out. Perking up at the opportunity, I tried to stand but it was hell just to sit up straight and my Goddamn legs refused to fucking support me. Well, I couldn't exactly run when my fucking useless legs wouldn't even hold me up. Goddamn to hell…..

 

“Here… you've torn up your wrists.” Zexion came back in with gauze and some kind of ointment. Settling before me, I flexed my numb fingers, feeling more coldness and tingle than my fingers. “Axel….” He sobered up rather quickly. “Listen… I know this is rough for you and I probably didn't choose the right course of action, but I don't really regret it. I figure if I only have one chance with you I'd make it worthwhile. I want you Axel.” Pausing, the emo pursed his lips. “I guess I should be glad you haven't completely murdered me by now, and I've expecting all kind of things from you, revenge, beating the hell out of me and all that, maybe even getting me kicked out of school.” He shrugged. The fucker sure knew how to kick a guy in the balls when he was down. Ouch…. Did he really expect that from me? That was, to say the least, and insult to my gentlemanly pride. He kept on.

 

“You know my life has sucked so I'm perfectly prepared for any of the consequences, Axel. I just don't know what else to do. You're not the kind of guy I can see as just letting me date you. I mean, if I asked you'd probably just laugh and cuss me out or something.”

 

Dammit… I knew if I was in his position I'd probably try the same thing, but honestly, I don't know if I've ever felt the same way or not. If Zexion just wanted me for sex, he had his fun and it was over and I'd never speak to the asshole again. If it was just pure lust, he could have used his non-dominate hand or something, or found a whore—there were plenty of them around. In a weird sense it was flattering, yet creepy as shit to think—no!—to know Zexion wanted me, like to date and go out with and stuff. Did he really think he loved me or some bullshit like that?

 

“I guess now's a really bad time to ask you to give me a chance….” He smiled weakly, running a hand up my chest and I tried to wiggle away. There wasn't much room to go anywhere. “At least let me take care of you right now, okay? Let me clean up and bandage your wrists, they're torn up.” He looked me full in the face for a moment and in all seriousness said. “In the morning you can do whatever you want.” In the morning? What the fuck did that mean?! I was getting the hell out of here as soon as my damn legs could work the accelerator.

 

“Spend the night with me,” Zexion said as though in answer to my curiosity. “You've been through a lot and you need a little time to recuperate. I know it doesn't seem like it but I'll take good care of you, okay?”

 

Taking the handcuffs off with the twist of a little key, I would have thrown a punch if I felt like I had any strength in my arms, but I felt absolutely drained and the best if would have done was felt more like a pussy slap. You know those dreams where something bad is happening or chasing you and you just can't run? Where you want to and you try to but you don't feel like you can make the effort or you feel like there's no willpower to even summon enough adrenaline to get your ass to safety? That's what it felt like to me. So Zexion cleaned my wrists off and they looked pretty bad but I guess it mostly just rubbed off skin, and he put the ointment on and it stung like hell and he put the bandages on. Frankly I was glad my wrists were chewed the fuck up because it gave me something else to focus on. Pushing me gently down to the bed, Zexion turned the flash light back off and rearranged the blankets. I tried moving away, but he ended up pulling me close and I had nothing left with which to protest.

 

Brushing back my hair and kissing a shoulder, Zexion pulled the blankets up and held onto me. It was sorta weird to be holding onto another guy, naked especially, but it wasn't that bad. I mean, whenever I was at Demyx's during a big storm, he was scared of the thunder and I ended up trying to sleep with him clinging to me. The only difference there was that we were both clothed. It felt nice to have another body against mine but I wish they had been under different fucking circumstances. I wish it was anyone but Zexion right then. I think the only way I did fall asleep was because I was so exhausted.