Love Hina Fan Fiction / Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction / Bubblegum Crisis Tokyo 2040 Fan Fiction ❯ Bat Tales ❯ Catwomen ( Chapter 2 )

“How did you get in here?” Batman snarled, in a tone that would have the hardiest street thugs wetting their pants. Rei merely looked curious.

“I followed you.” Batman’s scowl remained. He’d seen the relationship between Ayanami and his father. And he knew his father. Shinji had actually come up with a number of protocols to deal with such a situation, a minion of his father’s, infiltrating the Cave.

He was prepared to implement them the instant Rei made a false move. What did it matter that she was beautiful? That she had sworn to (and did) protect him? That she had those damn eyes of hers, scarlet and seemingly empty, but filled with a sadness and depth that matched his own.

“My experiences with such activities is limited,” she began, “but being a vigilante dressed as a bat seems to be a curious social past time.”

Blunt as ever.

“It’s my mission,” replied Shinji, still in his Batman mode. “It’s something I have to do.”

“Because of the murders of your aunt and uncle?” The azure-haired girl asked. Batman remained silent. Rei took that as assent.

“Why are you here, Ayanami?” Batman demanded. Ayanami tilted her head slightly.

“I was… Curious,” she admitted. “I followed you and… Saw you change.” She stared into Batman’s unwavering gaze.

“You are… Very different, as Batman. You are darker, in manner and appearance,” she continued. “And yet… There is the same… Spirit between you both.”

“Are you going to report this to my father?” Batman asked, more softly, closer to Shinji Ikari’s voice but with steel behind it. Rei stared back.

“I can only do what I am ordered to do-” She began.

“Rei… If I only did what I was told to do… I would be dead right now, okay?” Shinji pressed. “I’m Batman… Because I chose to become Batman. And… It means more to me than most anything in the world.”
“Why?” Rei asked.

“… I asked you why you pilot, correct?” Shinji asked. “Because it’s the only thing you have?” Rei nodded. “In some ways… This is the only thing I have. Besides Misato… That keeps me sane.” Shinji shrugged.

“I am Batman, Rei. It’s who I’ve molded myself into. It’s… It’s part of me. And if you tell the commander… Who I am…”

“It will cause you pain,” Rei stated. Shinji nodded fractionally. How strange, though the blue haired girl, that he can be Shinji within the suit, and yet Batman outside it. And yet, the suit is supposed to be all that separates the two.

“… My orders are to not let harm come to you,” Rei stated flatly. “This is a very dangerous mission you are undertaking.”

Shinji nodded, suspecting that she was trying to soften the blow-

“Therefore, you will require my protection for this undertaking,” she concluded, a slight twitch of her facial muscles resulting in a brief smile. Shinji blinked.

“… Wha?”

“Does not Batman require a Robin?” She asked smoothly. Batman frowned.

“This is dangerous, Rei… I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“And I am ordered not to let any harm come to you,” Rei responded. “And any failure in my duties requires reporting it to the Commander…”

God, why do you hate me? Shinji inquired silently. He got no response.

Batman sighed. It had been two weeks since Rei had joined up as “Batgirl”, citing that she did not particularly like the color red (and after Shinji pointed out that a simple domino mask wouldn’t conceal her identity sufficiently), and while he had to admit it was nice to have a partner, it was just once more thing to stress about.

She was on the other side of town, covering for him for Asuka-The-Devil-Wench. Since she’d showed up, he’d had to reschedule his patrols to keep the Second Child happy. Shinji’s psych profile intended for him to be subservient and “house-broken”. A girl like Asuka was supposed to illicit his sympathy, respect, and (he’d noted with disgust in the file he’d hacked) romantic interest.

Yeah, right, and maybe Catwoman would pop out of the comics right in-

“Evening, Batman,” came a sultry purr from the rooftop nearby. Batman frowned, and turned. In a feline (and very distracting) crouch, was a smirking Catwoman, short blonde hair, spilling over the shoulders of a matching vinyl (and extremely revealing) cat costume. In her hands sat a bag filled with gems from the jewelry store before them.

“Meow.”

… Shit.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Came his response in Batman’s roughest gravel. Catwoman purred.

“Having some fun… How about you? Would you like to join me?” Her gaze was starting to make Batman feel very uncomfortable.

Remember… You are Batman. Vengeance, night, justice… You can handle Catwoman. Even if she is sexy, and playful, and-GAH!

“Return the jewels and I might not tie you up and hang you from a light pole for the cops to pick up in the morning,” he growled, moving to intercept her. She grinned naughtily, nimbly dodging away.

“Ooh… Never figured you for the bondage type, Batman. It sounds interesting,” she purred, running her fingers over the bullwhip at her belt suggestively.

Batman DOES NOT have nosebleeds, Batman DOES NOT HAVE NOSEBLEEDS, he told himself, trying his damnedest not to blush.

“Stop right there, Catwoman!” Announced another feminine voice from another rooftop. Batman and Catwoman turned and watched as a lithe red-clad figure swung for them on a zip line… Completely missing Catwoman and swinging into an roof-to air conditioning unit with a loud clang.

“Erg… Check please,” the newcomer groaned, dizzily staggering towards Batman and the cat. Batman moved forward, catching the young woman before she could wander over the side of the building. He raised an eyebrow at her attire.

“Ooh… A sweet little bird,” Catwoman commented, licking her lips with a smile. “How about a threesome, Bats? Bat, cat, and bird, together…”

“Tweet,” commented Robin groggily, which kept Batman from blushing his cheeks off at that comment. It didn’t, however, keep him from noting just how… thin Robin’s attire was.

“Great… Who else can show up?” He muttered.

“Hey, Batman,” crooned another sultry voice. “Looks like you’ve got your… Hands… Full…” The three turned. Another Catwoman, identical costume with long lavender hair, stood staring at her twin.

“HEY! I thought we agreed!” Growled the second cat. “I’M Catwoman, you’re Riddler!”

“Well I couldn’t find my green leotard,” sniffed the blonde Catwoman.

“SO?! Buy a new one! Or steal a new one!” The lavender-haired woman snarled. “Copy-cat!”

“Oh yeah, that’s so creative,” drawled the blonde. “Slob!”

“Commander’s whore!”

“Kaji’s bitch!”

“THAT’S IT!” The lavender-haired Catwoman lunged for the blonde, and the two were tussling, biting, clawing, slapping, and kicking with a cacophony of screams and insults.

Batman watched for a moment, before calmly picking up the stolen jewels, attaching them to his utility belt, and turning away, Robin still gurgling in his arms. He fired off a zip line and swung away. The Catwomen didn’t notice until…

“… HEY! Let go! Let go! He’s gone!”

“You dirty-Huh? … Oh. So he is.”

“…”

“…”

“It&# 8217;s your fault.”

“MY FAULT?!”

The cat-fight resumed.

---

Gendo listened with a straight face as a heavily bandaged Major Katsuragi and Dr. Akagi reported their mission summaries, with a great deal of dirty looks directed at each other.

“I see… And Lieutenant Ibuki? Your mission report?”

The short haired woman was smiling dreamily, before she blinked.

“Huh? Commander? Did you say something?”

“How did your mission to contact Batman go?” The Commander repeated, hiding his frustration. Maya’s face erupted into a goofy grin.

“Wow,” she murmured. “He was so… Nice, and understanding… And swung away with me… And didn’t make fun of me… And… And…” She resumed her dreamy expression. Commander Ikari sighed, before turning to the sixth occupant of the room.

“Pilot Ikari… Your attempt at locating the Batman?” The Third Child sighed.

“Couldn’t even get his attention… I guess he was distracted… By, well,” he indicated the females in the room. Gendo sighed again.

“Very well… You are all dismissed.” A sheepish-looking Shinji, a glowing Maya, and two angry and hissing former college roommates left the dark office. A few moments passed. Fuyutsuki heard his commander make a strange, choked sound.

“Ikari? Are you-?” The older man froze as he watched Gendo begin laughing his head off, pounding the desk in front of him. Fuyutsuki blinked, before edging slowly away.

I really need to retire…

---

Maya sighed happily as she glomped a slightly-uncomfortable looking Shinji in the Batcave.

“Oh Shinji… You’ve made me sooo happy!” She gushed. The Third Child coughed.

“Ah… How?”

“You helped me,” she replied. “And accepted me… And you’re just so hot in your Batman costume,” she nuzzled his neck, making him blush. He was starting to wonder if letting Maya in on his and Rei’s secret was still such a good idea.

“Please, do just one thing for me?” Maya pleaded. Shinji blinked awkwardly.

“Um… Sure,” he replied.

“… Say it in the voice,” she sighed. Shinji rolled his eyes good-naturedly.

“To the Batmobile, Robin,” he growled in Batman’s low, gruff tone. Maya giggled.

“I, too, would like to hear it in your Batman voice, Ikari-kun,” added Rei, having just entered the Cave and pulled off her full-face Batgirl cowl. Shinji sighed.

At least Asuka hadn’t-

“BAKA! WHAT THE HELL ARE… You… Doing… Down…” The German redhead trailed off awkwardly, staring at Rei, Shinji, and Maya. Shinji groaned, and buried his face in Maya’s bosom.

“God, please, kill me now…”

---

“Oi,” Talon sighed, “this is getting out of hand.”

“You worry too much,” Musey scoffed. “Wait till I throw the books into the Ranma and Bubblegum Crisis time streams!”

“WHAT?! NO! STOP! MUSEY! FOR GOD’S SAKE!”

“WOOOOOO!”

Splash!

“… I am so dead…”

---