Loveless Fan Fiction ❯ My Plea ❯ Chapter 1

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

My Plea

Prayer gives a man the opportunity of getting to know a gentleman he hardly ever meets.

I do not mean his maker, but himself. ~William Inge

Hello God, they told me there was a temple here. I just thought it would be a good idea to visit.

I am not coming here for me really but for Soubi. I know I don't talk to you as much as I should.

He was hurt real bad today during a battle with Ritsu and Seimei. They kept on trying to attack me purposely, knowing he would protect me. Always protecting me, no matter what, regardless of the situation, even his life.

It's my fault, at least it feels that way, Seimei, after all is my brother. I could not get him to stop attacking! He looked so crazed, nothing like my brother at all; he wouldn't even talk to me!

I still do love him; I just don't respect him that much now. Ever since I found out how he used to treat Soubi, so disrespectfully, so cruelly, my desire to emulate him vanished.

Don't get me wrong, I do sometimes order Soubi around, but only because I worry about him. If anything, I feel more like a nagging wife. I would never blatantly disrespect Soubi, not ever!

He deserves all my respect and loyalty. Too many times, he has risked his well-being for me. There have been so many times; he left me behind just to keep me safe.

I am always first, my needs, my desires; he always tries to help me. My Soubi, he is all mine, but he doesn't realize, doesn't know I am his totally. Everything I have become, everything I am is his.

Soubi has showed me I am worthy of being loved. He has taught me that even though my name is Loveless, it doesn't mean I am without love. He told me it means we have little mercy for our enemies. He refuses to allow me feel bad about myself.

I feel so safe with him; no one can understand how good it feels to have someone so strong on your side.

I feel so guilty, because I have not told him how he has also taught me, that I can love. I love him so much more than he can ever realize.

But I am so scared to tell him, scared it will all go away, he'll go away. I know I am being paranoid, but losing Soubi…

All my progress would leave as well. Soubi is so important to me he is my sanity.

I have always wanted to be a good boy, so my mom would consider me her Ritsuka again. Now I want to be Soubi's good boy so he will always stay.

At this very moment though, you might take him away from me. So I beg you, please spare my Soubi. He is my life now; he keeps me going through all this.

Please, if you spare him, I will tell him how much I love him. I will tell him tell how much I want to share all my life with him.

My body I will give to him for whatever purpose he desires. My heart, even a part of my soul he already owns, I will just let him know it!

Hear my prayer God, and I will show Soubi more appreciation. I will no longer hide my feelings and desires of him.

I do desire him; it's been so hard sometimes. This constant rejection to my body, it craves him.

My ears and tail is his to take, have always been his to take. I won't hold him back anymore… I don't want to.

Whatever it takes to keep my Soubi here, I will do without hesitation. Whatever it takes to forever be his.