Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Breakaway ❯ A Journey and Lesson in Apathy ( Chapter 4 )

Breakaway

 

-------------------

 

Chapter 3: A Journey and Lesson in Apathy

 

-------------------

 

“Avail”- Fifth Wheel

 

Tripped all over my friends at once as they were starting to unwind

Had a feeling I was losing 'cause as they moved along I was falling far behind

I've got a frame full of good intentions that I left back at home to rot

Thought that to stay underground and go streamline I'd be strong, now I know I'm not

Every day's a week now a search for identity

The ground below my feet has got the best of me and I'm tired of always changing

I'm tired of being seen

The path is leading homeward bound, only God knows where I've been

I got sick of all my friends at once as they were starting to unwind

Had a feeling I was losing 'cause as they moved along I was falling far behind

 

----------------------

 

The dark was well settled in and the forest seemed to be alive, with the hoots of owls, the rushes of air as bats swooped down to collect buzzing insects. Every once in a while, the startled flight of a deer could be heard as it leapt gracefully away from danger.

 

Not that Sakura was a threat of any sort.

 

She barely had enough chakra to form a dispelling on genjutsu, nor the stamina to run more than seventy yards or so. She couldn't hurt something if her life depended on it.

 

After leaping over the outer wall of Konoha, which she deemed to be an incredible task considering her severe lack of stealth, Sakura walked along a thin, barely visible deer trail, hoping to encounter some water soon.

 

If she remembered one thing, it was that it was hard to track some one who traveled by water, and that even Kiba and Akamaru would have problems tracking her scent.

 

But once again, she was giving herself too much credit.

 

Konoha wouldn't notice her absence for the few days it took for Tsunade to receive her notice. Until that time, she was safe. And even then, what nin village sent out shinobi after useless civilians?

 

She knew there was no reason to attempt evasion. No one was going to come after her and beg her to come back.

 

After she had been kicked out of the hospital that had become apparent.

 

`Like I care…I was bored with my job anyways…nothing new ever came of it besides getting fired.'

 

Sakura stared vacantly down at where her feet were padding softly on the loamy ground. The leaves there made no sound due to the dew that was beginning to collect on them. The dew that accelerated their rate of decay, giving the Konoha forest its woodsy smell.

 

Shifting her sight from the trail, Sakura raised her eyes to the sky, feeling a keening disappointment that it wasn't cloudy and that it wasn't storming angrily.

 

Even the weather ignored her. The night was bright and life kept going on, whether she wanted it to or not.

 

But she couldn't bring herself to care too much. The weather was like everyone in Konoha. If it chose to ignore her plight, then so be it. Not like she could control the weather or anything.

 

Nothing to her. Not a name, not a family, not a friend, not a care.

 

Apathy was growing, and that little part of her that felt disappointment at the blatant ignorance of the weather was screaming a little louder, struggling to keep from being swallowed alive by a blanket of consuming emptiness and numbness.

 

And she ignored it. Paying it any attention, listening to its pleas only caused her to kill it more when everything went wrong all over again.

 

Turning her thoughts from her locked away inner drive and emotion, Sakura concentrated on the sounds of the forest that surrounded her, in the hustle and bustle that was night life.

 

The sounds soon lulled her into a blank daze, her gaze empty and emotionless as it stared unfocused at the ground a few feet in front of her.

 

An undisclosed amount of time flew by as Sakura drifted in her numb subconscious.

 

She was broken from it as her foot struck a shallow stream, sending cool droplets of water onto the pale skin of her legs.

 

She glanced down at it with the look of someone who had never seen such a thing before, but couldn't care less.

 

Which she didn't besides the fact that this was what she had been looking for last night.

 

Last night meaning that the sun was glaring through the leaves at the tree tops, casting a green cover over everything in the area, except where there were no leaves to be struck.

 

Sakura had been traveling in a comatose state all night, and she could feel the effects of her endeavor.

 

Her feet had gained blisters from the rubbing and chafing of her shoes, her leg muscles screamed at her to sit down for a few hours and work out their cramps, her neck hurt for reason's she didn't know.

 

And she had a raging thirst, and was feeling hungry.

 

Deciding to obey the demands of her body for the moment, Sakura sat down at the edge of the stream and removed her sweaty top and shoes.

 

Inspecting her feet, she found they were swollen with blisters as big as coins on her heels and on the balls of her feet. Numerous blisters were on the tops of her toes and along outside of her foot.

 

Reaching into her pack, Sakura pulled out an unused shirt and ripped it into small strips which were going to be used to wrap up her feet. After completing that task, she proceeded to pull out a small bit of food and her canteen. She feasted until the morsel of food was gone, then packed her canteen away.

 

She soon stripped off her slightly sweaty remainder of clothes, and scooted until she was sitting in the cold flowing water. She lay down and let the liquid suck away her warmth and numb her body to match her drowning soul.

 

Her aches slowly disappeared, and satisfied that she would be able to continue her trek, she sat back up and scooted back onto land. She let her body air dry for a few minutes before wrapping her feet, dressing, and standing back up.

 

After shrugging her back pack onto her shoulders, she strutted back into the water and began to follow the gentle curves that it carved out of the land.

 

Even the day was mocking her state, she observed.

 

Songbirds were trilling joyfully everywhere and could be seen through the leaves of the canopy dancing on gusts of air. They would loop, dodge, and feint everywhere, like some part of a large planned choreography. The sun was brilliantly set like some fiery jewel in the cloudless sky, flashing merrily at every turn.

 

She felt that she should be sneering at it for its mockery, but the will just wasn't in her to do so. It was the expectation of feeling an emotion, like it was a ghost possessing her, that she felt, not the emotion itself.

 

Instead she just kept walking, not paying attention to her surroundings anymore. She'd trekked through these woods enough that she wasn't concerned about finding herself walking back to Konoha.

 

From what she could tell, she was a day or two away from the edge of the forest, and from there it would be a few days of crossing over savanna before she reached the edge of the desert. Suna actually wasn't that far away from the edge of the desert. It was closer than most people thought, only a half a days travel until you encountered rock formations where the hidden village was sequestered away.

 

It would be about a week of increasing temperatures and less shade before she arrived at her destination. This was assuming no one interrupted her travels, which was one of those annoying occurrences that always happened when you didn't want them to.

 

Stupid traveling. Stupid Naruto will probably cause it. Trouble followed the idiot blonde, and he had an awful habit of following her around. By process of association, trouble then followed Sakura around.

 

Stupid Naruto…somehow this is his fault.

 

Distantly amused at her abuse of the Kyuubi, Sakura moved on, water splashing up her legs and wetting the bottom of her black capris.

 

That little part of her hoped that her final destination, and her last hope at reviving her self, would prove to be a success.

 

If not, Sakura would wither away in the middle of desert, completely broken. The little voice in the back of her mind would give one last scream at the injustice of it all before dying, taking her will to live with it.

 

She didn't really want to think about it, but the prospect seemed disturbingly interesting. She realized that her humor had taken a very morbid turn, finding death and suffering entertaining to observe or think about.

 

Her own situation seemed insanely hilarious to her. How much more pathetic could she be? Not much, but she lacked to motivation beyond her little journey to make the change. She needed someone to command her on what to do, order her to change her mind.

 

So far, no one in Konoha had tried to do that. Instead, they had left Sakura to fester in her own dark emotions and thoughts until they started to kill her off little by little, consuming all that was in her heart and mind, leaving a large blank space where her soul used to reside.

 

So she traveled on, floating in a vacant space devoid of emotion.

 

----------------------------

 

Gaara leered down at the shinobi kneeling in front of him. It had been a week since Temari had notified surrounding countries and hidden villages of his logic behind refusing marriage at the moment.

 

And one thing he hated most was having his wishes ignored. Who was stupid enough to ignore him anyways, besides idiot Naruto? Much less protest.

 

Gaara reminded himself not to kill the messenger. The poor man looked terrified and terribly guilty about his village's leader.

 

“I must apologize for my Kage, great Kazekage. He is very old and set in tradition, and believes that both you and the Hokage are in need of guidance. But he insists that you take a wife effective immediately. That an alliance set up by a union would help rebuild you village.”

 

Gaara snarled, his tired eyes snapping with rage at being told what to do.

 

“It would do your Kage well to govern his own village before governing mine or Konoha. The Hidden Village of Sand will rebuild, but without outside help. We do have techniques that are specific to our area, and we will not divulge them just because your old geezer of a Kage can't mind his own business and leave people alone! Get out of my sight right now and tell him that Gaara, Kazekage of the Sand, refuses his `generous offer' and that we will rebuild on our own!”

 

The young shinobi didn't need to be told twice and fled the office, terror rolling off of him in almost tangible waves. He knew all to well what Gaara of the Sand was capable of. The young man almost cried when his Kage demanded that he deliver the message. He was tasked only because he was the quickest in the village, using connecting shadows to move through the country side up until he hit the desert.

 

He sprinted past a blonde with four ponytails, who shook her head in exasperation as she walked calmly to the office door.

 

There she found a fuming Gaara, though it wasn't very physically apparent. Instead, she read it in his eyes as they sparked angrily at her, and it showed in his slightly hunched shoulders and tense stance.

 

“Gaara, did you threaten to kill the poor boy? He looked like he crapped his pants, he left in such a hurry.”

 

Gaara openly scowled at his sister.

 

“No, I didn't threaten to kill the messenger. Instead I just called his Kage all sorts of mean things and gave him the message to tell the old geezer to mind his own damn village and business. He seems to think that we can't stand on our own and never will. Idiot.”

 

Temari smirked at her younger brother's behavior, not phased in the least by his potent irritation.

 

“All right Gaara, I trust you. Where was the messenger from? And what did their Kage want, exactly.”

 

The red head's eyes bore down on his sibling, just wishing that looks could kill. But they did not, so he was obligated to answer her question.

 

“Harassment on that subject. Apparently he already has some females lined up for me to choose from. He's going to press his daughter though.”

 

A shudder ran through Gaara's form. The messenger was forced to bring photos of all the females that were up for choosing. The tanuki container could stomach all but one of the photos. His sand had even reacted badly upon sight.

 

The woman was slightly overweight, but had a decent even dark shade of skin. It was the face that was the kicker for him. He'd never thought it possible to have eyes spaced that far apart, plus one repulsive hazel eye faced only in one direction. Her hair looked greasy and limp, further repulsing the Kazekage.

 

Temari saw the shudder rip through her younger brother and could only marvel that there was something out there that repulsed him that much. Gaara feared nothing, but apparently, this female scared the shit out of him.

 

“That bad huh?”

 

Gaara snarled.

 

“Kami must have made a mistake placing her on this earth. I don't even think her mother loved her.”

 

He thrust out a clenched hand toward the blonde.

 

“If you can unwrinkle that photo, you'll see what I'm talking about. But wait until I depart the room. If I could sleep, I'd have nightmares about what is on that piece of paper.”

 

Temari accepted the crumpled bit of trash and glanced back and forth from it to her brother in a confused and amused way.

 

`Who'da thunk it? Gaara afraid…this'll make such great blackmail! Maybe he'll pay more attention to what I have to say from now on!'

 

The Suna ruler glanced at the look of glee that was slowly creeping over his sibling's visage, and felt growing unease. He didn't like that look at all, it meant bad things coming from his sister who, in her own right, was insane.

 

“I'm leaving now…don't plan anything. Any attempts to debase me will be met with unrestrained violence.”

 

Temari just kept smiling.

 

“Have a good day brother! I'll see you around!”

 

With the dismissal, Gaara walked out of his office completely disgruntled, intent on talking a walk around the outer boundaries of the village to attempt to clear his mind of old geezer, ugly brides, and psychotic, plotting sisters.

 

It was going to be a long walk…

 

--------------------------------------------

 

Her water had run out about two days ago, and her skin was a blazing red, blisters covering every inch of her body that was exposed to light. Some scrapes and gashes covered her arms and legs from not paying attention to where she was walking. Some of the worse ones had been bandaged, but blood was slowly seeping up to the surface.

 

She could barely think straight much less walk straight. She stumbled every couple of steps, but for the most part caught herself before she fell.

 

The sand was making the task of staying upright even more daunting. Lucky her that the dunes didn't start up until almost the middle of the desert.

 

She licked her cracked lips for the hundredth time, knowing that it wasn't going to achieve anything except dehydrating herself some more.

 

She had crossed into the desert about five hours ago, so she knew she was drawing closer to her destination, so close that she could spy the tell-tale rocky outcroppings. But she didn't know how much longer she had until she passed out.

 

It would be easier just to pass out because patrolling shinobi would pick her up. That is, Konoha shinobi would. She wasn't so sure about Sand.

 

Not to mention that Sand probably couldn't afford to set up patrols. All available shinobi would be out on paying missions or tutoring new shinobi. Not patrolling the area.

 

So if she hoped to make it there, the only reliable way to get there was herself.

 

Grunting as she misstepped, she fell forward onto her stomach, biting back hisses of pain as sand worked its way into her wounds, into open blisters. She was fairly sure that she was running a high fever, but she couldn't tell in all this heat.

 

As she gathered her strength to stand up once again, her eyes caught a figure growing in the distance among the distorting heat waves rising from the sand. At least she thought it was a real person. This time.

 

She'd already had about five hallucinations of someone walking up toward her. One she could have sworn was Naruto. Another was a bloody and insane Sasuke. She didn't really feel anything upon seeing them, but felt a vague surprise that her mind would conjure such strange things.

 

The blurry figure she saw now had red hair and was wearing exceptionally dark clothing for being out in the desert heat.

 

As the figure started to resolve itself, Sakura realized that the figure was a real person and that they were making their way toward her in hurried steps.

 

The last thing she saw was a pair of jade eyes swathed in black, flashing with recognition and surprise.

 

Funny, they seemed full of emotion, nothing like how she remembered.

 

How oddly…disappointing.

 

--------------------------------

 

Gaara had sensed weak, struggling chakra not far off during his walk on the border side of Suna. He had almost let it slip by, not wanting anymore harassment in his already ruined day.

 

But something was familiar about that chakra, though it seemed greatly reduced than would be normal.

 

Debating with his conscience, he finally caved and stalked irritably toward the dying chakra. It wasn't becoming of his status to just leave someone to perish if he could help it.

 

As he drew closer, he picked up his speed, not quite believing what he was glimpsing. He'd only met one person in all his travels that had that shade of pink hair.

 

It was the Haruno girl from Konoha, the one who had almost thrown her own life away to save the psycho that destroyed his village.

 

In those few seconds that they had held eye contact, he'd flashed back to where he'd seen that pain before. Such pain to rival his own, who had never suffered physically all his life, but suffered from social deprivation.

 

It had shocked him to the core, but he didn't let himself dwell on it, wanting to finish off the pest that had dared to lay a hand on him. Only to have the blonde brat interfere also.

 

But he was grateful for the intervention. It had allowed him to get closer to his siblings and also shocked him a little bit from his cynical views on the world. Not completely, one-hundred-eighty degree changed his outlook, but made him look closer at the reason why some of the people acted the way they did, and two allow for one second chance.

 

Temari just ended up calling him a wuss whenever it happened. Told him he was going soft.

 

Feh. Soft, as if.

 

Turning back to look at the fallen kunoichi, he was frozen in place once again by her sea green eyes.

 

They didn't even hold pain anymore. They were just dead.

 

And the feeling he felt sweeping through him was one he had never felt before.

 

It was dread.

 

How oddly…disorienting.

 

----------------------------------------

 

She felt the pain hovering above her in unconsciousness, and wanted nothing more than to stay deep in the comforting numbness and blackness that was her mind.

 

How nice it would be to just stay there…not a care in the world.

 

Not that even in the real world she cared. Rain or shine, black or white, she couldn't bring herself to care.

 

But something was tugging her to the surface, to the pain and bright light. To a world that didn't care for her existence one way or the other. To people who called themselves her friends, but really didn't feel anything but pity.

 

Every smile for pity, not even sympathy was dragged up for her.

 

And their treatment of her, broke her soul and broke her will.

 

So why was she letting them pull her back if they didn't care?

 

Maybe because this was a punishment. She must have done something horribly wrong in another life and this was her repentance. Her punishment. To suffer.

 

Biting back a groan, she blinked slowly into conciousness, slowly waiting for her mind to properly piece together all of the shapes and colors into something coherent.

 

All she met was white.

 

----------------------------------------

 

A/N: And end this chapter. Good, poor editing? Rushed, not descriptive enough? Oh, and sorry for the Naruto bashing, it may disappear later. After all, our favorite Kitsune container did give a lot, and he really does care. ^^ Anyways, shout out to my homie reviewers:

 

The Squabbit- Just a little bit easily readable. I'm sure that all the caps, exclamation marks, and hurried typing had nothing to do with it. -sweatdrops- but thank you! I enjoy reading your replies. -grins-

 

Silent Kunoichi- O.K.H.U.G. (OKay. Here U Go.) -smiles wickedly-

 

Lady-Azura- Thank you.

 

EnV- There. She met Gaara. Both seem to be a bit disappointed…hrmm. Well, thanks for the review!

 

WolfRainSS- See Hao'sAnjul (look below -points-)

 

Krista- err…okay…I guess I won't take this as a flagrant flame…thanks…

 

Hao'sAnjul- Mehbeh…mehbeh not…up to how cruel I feel like being.

 

xXxAllMySinsxXx- Thank you much!

 

LadyJasmine282- Thank you.

 

Green24- Thank you.

 

The warmth of the Afterglow- Thank you! Such praise inflates my ego. Don't do it too much. -sniggers- But really, thanks.

 

DarkAngelB- Not much more behind the Tsunade thing. They honestly though Sakura might go postal on the patients with the way she was acting. But you're right, we shall see.

 

QuicksilverWitch- Thank you.

 

Yokaigurl- Thank you!

 

marise-chan- Thank you. It is meant to be very angsty.

 

ShadowKitsune-Sama- Here it is.