Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Cranked! ❯ Jiraiya Probably Gets Cranked ( Chapter 5 )

Jiraiya Probably Gets Cranked

 

 

 

“Let's see here…” King Yama said as he read from Jiraiya's list of sins. “Jiraiya… hmm… well, your major sins are peeping…”

 

“Research.” Jiraiya corrected.

 

“Groping women's breasts…”

 

“Checking to see if they were healthy.” Jiraiya pointed out.

 

“Child abuse…”

 

“I was training Naruto.” Jiraiya stressed. “That's why I pushed him into a chasm! I-I wasn't actually trying to kill him!”

 

“Well, with these sins, I'm afraid you can only get into upper-lower Heaven.” Yama explained. “Maybe if you weren't such a friggin' perv—.”

 

The phone on Yama's desk suddenly rang. He picked it up and answered it. “It's for you, Jiraiya.”

 

Jiraiya took the phone and put it to his ear. “Hello?” He answered. “Uh… is this Jiraiya?” A nasally voice asked over the phone. “Yes, why?” Jiraiya asked.

 

“We just wanted to let you know that some blonde kid has taken over writing your book series.” The voice said. “His name's Narutoo or something. Anyways, he's writing the books in your name.”

 

“That's nice of Naruto.” Jiraiya observed. “Yeah, not really.” The voice argued. “You see, all he's really writing about is ramen. He's ruining your dead name.”

 

“What?!” Jiraiya exclaimed. “I just happen to have a copy right here.” The voice nasal-ed. “It says… `Torikkusuta slurped away at a bowl of ramen. His hair was brown—brown as ramen broth. His eyes were as green as the onions you put in ramen. He was eating ramen, too. Suddenly, a girl wearing nothing but a dress made from bowls of ramen—.'”

 

“ENOUGH!” Jiraiya yelled as he tossed the phone aside and, seeing a near by Shinigami, grabbed a black book from him. Jiraiya pulled out a pen and began feverishly writing in the book.

 

A few seconds later, Naruto fell from the sky, having drowned in a bowl of ramen. “What just happened?!” He yelled in shock.

 

Jiraiya heard laughter from the phone. It was only too late that he realized he had fallen for a crank-call and, as a recite, killed Naruto and made a Death Note reference all in one moment!

 

“I'm going to Hell for this, aren't I?” Jiraiya asked King Yama. “Under normal circumstances, yes…” King Yama explained. “But since you helped my daughter finally lose her virginity, I'm willing to let it slide.”

 

“Hooray!” Jiraiya cheered as a trapdoor opened in the ceiling, sucking him up into upper-lower Heaven.

 

“What about me?” Naruto asked. “I got killed!”

 

“I could care less!” King Yama exclaimed. “I'm the King of Hell, not the King of Who-Gives-A—“

 

 

 

IN MEMORY OF JIRAIYA

CHAPTER 90—CHAPTER 383