Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Falls Apart ❯ The Way She Breaks ( Chapter 4 )

Falls Apart

 

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Disclaimer: Naruto will forever be out of my reach. I am penniless.

 

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Chapter 4: The Way She Breaks

 

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Gone

By Kelly Clarkson

What you see's not what you get
With you there's just no measurement
No way to tell what's real from what isn't there
Your eyes they sparkle
That's all changed into lies that drop like acid rain
You washed away the best of me
You don't care

You know you did it
I'm gone
To find someone to live for
In this world
There's no light at the end of the tunnel tonight
Just a bridge that I gotta burn
You're wrong
If you think you can walk right through my door
That is just so you
Coming back when I've finally moved on
I'm already gone

Sometimes shattered
Never open
Nothing matters
When you're broken
That was me whenever I was with you
Always ending
Always over
Back and forth, up and down like a rollercoaster
I am breaking
That habit
Today

You know you did it
I'm gone
To find someone to live for
In this world
There's no light at the end of the tunnel tonight
Just a bridge that I gotta burn
You're wrong
If you think you can walk right through my door
That is just so you
Coming back when I've finally moved on
I'm already gone

There is nothing you can say
Sorry doesn't cut it, babe
Take the hint and walk away
'Cause I'm gone
Doesn't matter what you do
It's what you did that's hurting you
All I needed was the truth
Now I'm gone

What you see's not what you get
What you see's not what you get

You know you did it
I'm gone
To find someone to live for
In this world
There's no light at the end of the tunnel tonight
Just a bridge that I gotta burn
You're wrong
If you think you can walk right through my door
That is just so you
Coming back when I've finally moved on
I'm already gone
I'm already gone
Oh, I'm already gone, gone, gone, gone
Already gone
I'm gone

 

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Tsunade softly knocked on the door where the two were still sleeping. As she opened the door, her heart melted at the sight that met her eyes.

 

Somehow in their three hours or so of sleep, Sakura had taken over the dominant support role. Where Shikamaru had originally been wrapped around Sakura, now the white-pink haired kunoichi was wrapped around the jounin.

 

His head was laid peacefully upon her chest, one of his arms thrown haphazardly over her slim waist. His face was the most relaxed Tsunade had ever seen it, his eyebrows no longer in their perpetual scowl, nor his mouth in its frown. Years seemed to be lifted from him and he appeared to be the twenty three year old he really was.

 

Sakura on the flipside, had one hand buried into Shikamaru's hair, the other hand grasping the jounin's arm around her waist. Her head was turned toward Shikamaru, and she too had become extremely youthful in her sleep, her pale hair framing her face like a halo.

 

Tsunade wished for anything in the world to stop her from waking the two up, but she knew that something had to be done about Sasuke before he came home and started ripping up Konoha. The only two who stood a chance at achieving this, were the sleeping couple before her.

 

Reluctantly, Tsunade reached a hand out to smooth Sakura's long pale bangs away from her face and tuck the errant strands behind the kunoichi's ear. Sakura was her legacy, the daughter she never had. And she wanted the young woman to be happy.

 

The Godaime cupped Sakura's face in her hand and gently spoke to wake her successful apprentice.

 

“Sakura…”

 

The Hokage was met with a soft groan, and a grimace from the female ninja.

 

“Sakura, you need to wake up. There are things you need to take care of before you can sleep.”

 

Sea-foam green eyes blinked hazily open, immediately trying to focus on who ever it was that was so rudely interrupting her sleep.

 

“Tsu…nade?” Sakura narrowed her eyes to focus them.

 

“Hai. Good afternoon Sakura. You need to wake up. There are things you need to take care of. Plus I don't want to wake Shikamaru up. He seems to be the type that is grumpy when he wakes up.” Tsunade gave a soft, but evil grin as she glanced down at the oblivious Nara.

 

Sakura immediately blushed ten shades of red. What the…? Since when was Shikamaru invited to share a bed with her? She never remembered extending that invitation to him. Not to mention his hentai placement of his head on her chest.

 

Tsunade quickly made tracks out of the room, not wanting to be privy to the hell that was about to break loose from Sakura.

 

“NARA SHIKAMARU! GET OFF OF ME AND MY BED!”

 

Shikamaru shot up immediately, forgetting where he was and toppling over and falling onto the tile floor due to the entanglement of limbs that tripped him up.

 

“What? What's going on? Are we being attacked?”

 

Sakura grabbed the nearest thing she could find to hurl at Shikamaru and came up with a tray that had brought food on it earlier. Without any preamble, she slammed it down on the crown of Shikamaru's head. “You are being attacked! I am attacking you, you perv! How dare you presume to sleep in the same bed as me! Wanting company and wanting someone to share a horizontal surface with are two completely different things!”

 

Sakura's eyes were ablaze, and Shikamaru scuttled back on the tile floor in fear of his personal well-being.

 

“I'm sorry! I swear I'll never do it again!” Shikamaru lifted an arm up to block the green plastic food tray that was raining vengeance down upon his abused form. No doubt he'd have some impressive bruises in a few hours. Sakura and plastic trays were now labeled as public enemy number one for Shikamaru. In fact, he made a note to himself that any object plus an angry Sakura was considered a threat to his life.

 

Sakura finally calmed down after Shikamaru's apology, but her eyebrow twitched every now and then to remind Shikamaru that he was still walking on thin ice. “Good. See to it that you don't.”

 

The kunoichi then calmly placed the green tray of pain back where she had grabbed it from. Shikamaru visibly relaxed some more now that he was safe from an unreasonable beating.

 

Picking himself up off of the floor and brushing off non existent dust, Shikamaru let his customary scowl settle across his face. Shoving his hands into his pants pocket, he let lose a grumble.

 

“Troublesome…”

 

Shikamaru found himself on the floor again, sure that the welt appearing on his head had appeared out of nowhere, because he hadn't even seen Sakura lunge at him. Glancing at said kunoichi, he gulped nervously at the look of barely restrained hell on her face.

 

In an attempt to save his pathetic life, Shikamaru composed himself while staying on the floor, and cleared his throat.

 

“Neh, Sakura…do you feel better now? Because you need to be ready, whether you are feeling better or not. The time bomb is ticking.”

 

Sakura immediately sobered up, her face going from a bright, heated red, to a clammy, pasty pale. Her hands clenched almost painfully onto the white hospital blanket covering her lower half.

 

“How…how could I forget? He's always been a time-bomb. I thought I could defuse him and I failed in that regard, but at least I could regulate when he detonated. He's not predictable now. He could act there's nothing wrong for a couple of days then go off, or maybe he'll have a meltdown right when he gets home and his wench isn't there to take his frustrations out on. All I was to him was some sort of indestructible sex toy that he could beat on without fear of it breaking.”

 

Sakura was crying once again, but this time the tears weren't noticed. Instead, she grew angry. Angry at Sasuke for everything he'd done to her. Angry at herself for letting him have his way. She would redeem herself, even if it killed her. No matter that she was still scared shitless at the idea of squaring off with the Uchiha heir.

 

Shikamaru gazed up at Sakura, unsure of what to do. She was upset again, but this time…oh, if looks could kill…he wouldn't place his life on the line right now, for Sakura would surely beat the daylights out of him if he said anything now. Her and that damn green tray that was still within her arm reach. He shut his eyes in aggravation, his eyebrow twitching to show his irritation at his situation. Sheesh, talk about being caught between a rock and a hard place.

 

Shikamaru set his mind to thinking, plotting how he could attempt to calm Sakura down without endangering his life and his clan. He opened one eye, turning it to the tray as it rested almost innocently on the table next to Sakura's bed.

 

He could have sworn it was mocking him, taunting that he wouldn't get within a few feet of it before Sakura gave him a concussion. Mentally sneering at it, he turned his one open eye back to Sakura, who still hadn't shown signs of calming.

 

He shouldn't lunge straight for the tray. That would be too obvious, yet she probably wouldn't suspect him of being so bold. She would suspect him to be sneaky and smart with his planning, going on a convoluted, twisted path in order to liberate the mocking green tray from Sakura's hostility.

 

He opted for the bold maneuver in just grabbing it. It was obviously something he wouldn't normally due.

 

With his mind made up, Shikamaru opened both eyes and calmly walked up next to Sakura's bed, grabbing the tray with ease and moving out of striking distance. Shikamaru pouted when he saw that Sakura hadn't even processed that he had removed her favorite weapon from her domineering grasp.

 

And it also concerned him.

 

Depositing the tray on the floor next to the door, he walked up to Sakura's bed, sitting his weight down on the edge. He knew he risked getting abused again, but he needed her alert for tonight.

 

Tentatively, he reached both his hands out to cover Sakura's fisted ones. After sensing no improvement, Shikamaru gently, but firmly began to pry Sakura's death grip from the hostage blanket.

 

Once he had freed them, he found her crushing grip being transferred to his own hands. He bit back a yelp as he felt his knuckles grind together. Not to be deterred from his task, Shikamaru ignored the pain in his hands to focus on Sakura's distant, angry visage.

 

“Sakura? Sakura, come on, you need to snap out of your mood. We can't fight if you are like this.”

 

Still no response. Shikamaru growled in the back of his mind. `Troublesome…' Sighing to himself, he decided that if he was going to get hit, then heck, he was going to get hit.

 

Shikamaru carefully extracted and lifted his one of his hands and gently grasped Sakura's chin in his fingers.

 

“Sakura…Sakura you need to snap out of this. I understand that this entire ordeal is a shock to the system. But you need to regroup.”

 

He shook her gently. He held himself from leaping out of skin when Sakura's angry, tormented sea-foam eyes turned from burning a hole in the hospital blanket, to searing him.

 

“Neh, Sakura. Better now?”

 

Sakura's eyes narrowed causing Shikamaru to visibly shrink back. “Much better. Let's get this over with while I'm still pissed.”

 

Sakura yanked her head out of Shikamaru's grasp and let go of his hand as if it were poisoned. Inside her head, she was lost in an angry red haze. All she could think of were all the terrible things Sasuke had done to her when she had been nothing but a loving wife, catering to his every need. He'd ruined her future! They were supposed to be married happily, with many little Uchiha heirs scampering about.

 

Then a thought side-struck her: how, after all of these years of being lovers, had she not had a child? It was strange to think that after all this time and not using protection, that she wasn't pregnant. Was that why Sasuke was mad? Why he slept with other women? It answered a lot of questions…

 

Shikamaru watched as Sakura half rose out of the bed before stiffening. He was taken aback at the look of shock that crossed her face, her eyes glazed and her mouth hanging slightly open.

 

He grouched to himself. First sad, then righteously angry, then sad again, then stark raving mad, now this… He scratched behind his head, attempting to assess his situation, so as to best approach it without causing an uproar.

 

How? How could this happen? Surely she would know if she was barren or not. How? She sat back down in a daze, her back toward Shikamaru as she analyzed this life changing realization. No kids? No family? No boo-boos, cute baby clothes, parent-teacher conferences? No watching as her son or daughter proudly graduated from the shinobi academy? No letting her kids pick on Naruto while she visited Hinata?

 

`I want a family…now I see that I never had the ability…'

 

Sakura felt a few tears drop silently down her face from the shock of her revelation. She brought a hand up and wiped the wet trails off of her face, staring numbly at the glistening upon her fingers.

 

She'd never actually believed she had wanted children, to settle down and start a family. But you never know what you got `til it's gone.

 

She smirked in irony as she remembered that song. She'd liked it, but not because it had applied to her. The song had a certain quality that she enjoyed, but she couldn't place a finger on why.

 

Brokenly, Sakura sang under her breath. “And don't it always seem to go, that you don't know what you got until it's gone…they paved paradise to put up a parking lot…”

 

She started as she felt a hand fall on her shoulder. She turned her head to look up at Shikamaru who was doing his best to look comforting, but looking extremely uncomfortable all the while. She placed her hand on top of his and gave him a watery smile.

 

“I'm so sorry Shikamaru. I've been unstable for so long, and I'm setting it all loose on you. I'm alright.”

 

Shikamaru seemed to relax a bit. She'd found a center, sad but calm. Anger would be preferable for what was coming, but any sort of collected thought processes were thankful.

 

“Some clothes are waiting for you in the bathroom. Hurry up and get dressed. We don't have much time to get ready.”

 

Sakura nodded and let go of Shikamaru, standing smoothly up, but feeling like her bones were made of lead. She slowly moved out into the hallway towards the bathroom, never feeling Shikamaru's eyes leave her form. Her heart warmed a bit that someone was concerned. Maybe she would survive the night, just knowing that someone would miss her.

 

She walked into the bathroom and shut the door behind her, locking it for some privacy that she hadn't had in a couple of days. She eyed the clothes sitting innocently on the sink, scowling as she realized that the shirt wasn't long sleeved.

 

Tearing her eyes from the clothing, she glanced into the mirror. Normally she wouldn't be so shocked at her reflection, but she had not honestly looked at herself in a long time. She drank in the figure that stared at her with long, silky pink-white hair and frothy green eyes.

 

She brought up a hand and brushed her fingers underneath her eyes, marveling at the lack of the sags that had taken up residence there over her years of insomnia. Her face had lost its childish aspect, filling out for high cheekbones but flattening their planes.

 

That person in the mirror couldn't possibly be her. The person was too beautiful to be her, and her forehead was a normal size.

 

After getting her fill of wondering who it was on the other side of the mirror, she turned back to the pile of clothes. But damn it all, she knew who had picked these clothes out.

 

Tsunade-sama had always had it out for her, saying Sakura had a wonderful, toned body and that it needed to be displayed properly. Sakura could almost swear her sensei had checked her out a few times, and not in a very professional manner.

 

Sakura always had to wonder why Tsunade had never had a boyfriend.

 

Grumbling at her poor luck and at a scheming sensei, Sakura angrily grabbed the clothes off of the counter and put them on.

 

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“Sakura, are you going to come out? You've been in there for almost twenty minutes.”

 

“Not until you grab Tsunade and drag her hentai ass here so she can explain a few things to me, Shikamaru.”

 

Shikamaru scowled. Why wouldn't she come out? She had clothes didn't she?

 

`Troublesome…'

 

“But why won't you come out? I need to give Tsunade-sama a reason to come here. She is a busy Godaime.”

 

“She knows damn well why I'd be asking for her to come down here. So I don't need to tell you, and hopefully you'll never find out. NOW GO GET HER!” Sakura shouted angrily.

 

As Shikamaru grumbled, but walked away, Sakura seethed as she glanced down at her outfit. There was a severe lack of cloth on her body. And she was not happy about it.

 

The black skirt was about the same as her old one, if not a tad bit shorter, with the slits in the sides going a couple more centimeters higher, along with being low-rise. The irritating black thong underwear would only fit if the straps rose high up over her hip bones before sinking back underneath the skirt's minimal material. But what really had her going was the top. It wasn't even qualified to be a shirt. Instead, it fit in the category of a glorified bra.

 

The straps only went over one shoulder, and there were four of them. One strap started on the far opposite side of where it went over the shoulder. The second was a little closer, but remained on the same cup as the last one. The straps went so on and so forth, and were the same way on the back. The entire contraption was a teal that brought out her eyes.

 

And her shoes! She was going to kill her sensei. Who in their right mind would fight in high heels?

 

Sneering disgustedly at her outfit, Sakura failed to realize that the door was being unlocked from the outside. So when it finally opened, Sakura whirled in surprise, immediately en garde.

 

Now faced with a smirking sennin, Sakura let loose her fearsome rage.

 

“How dare you! This is a complete embarrassment and a mockery to shinobi. You know this is not a serviceable uniform for duty at any place but a brothel!”

 

The smirk grew along with the Godaime's amusement.

 

“But Sakura, you look so beautiful! You never wear anything flattering. All you need is to put your hair up into a ponytail and put on some clothe strips around your wrists and one around your thigh, then you'll be good to go.”

 

Sakura blushed, but didn't let her fury lessen. “What did you do to my other clothes? I need to change.”

 

Tsunade snickered conspiratorially. Sakura did not like the look on her face.

 

“They were all blood stained and had to be disposed of.”

 

“They were not blood stained! All I had wrong with me was a broken arm and a few bruises on both skin and ribs. Stupid sennin! You're no better than Jiraiya! Hentai woman!”

 

The Godaime's smirk disappeared after that statement.

 

“Having an eye for beauty and being hentai are two completely different things. For one, I have no intention of getting in your pants, or just staring at you. I, for a matter, think it is a waste to hide beauty. As a kunoichi, beauty can get you into hard to infiltrate places that even some high level shinobi can't get into. Besides, I don't think Shikamaru minds your new look.”

 

Sakura looked sharply behind Tsunade, having completely forgotten that the jounin had followed the Godaime back from her office. The shinobi was failing miserably to hide an extravagant blush that stained his cheeks as he screwed his eyes shut in order to not gawk at Sakura's seemingly half-naked body.

 

“And you expect me to work in this around him? Tsunade-baasan, you're sick. This not practical for either him or I. So get me my old clothes back, or go buy me some more decent ones.”

 

Sakura looked ready to kill as Tsunade shook her head in a negative, her smirk ever going.

 

“As Godaime, I do not take orders from anyone, much less a little chuunin. So you're stuck Sakura, and you better like it.”

 

The chuunin remark was the last straw for Sakura. It wasn't her fault that she'd been too oppressed these past few years to take the jounin exam. Sasuke, while he was still nice to her, had said that there was no need to for her to do so while he lived with her. That he'd protect her. Some promise that had been.

 

In a fury, Sakura lunged at Tsunade and planted a fist into the side her face and then a kick to the Godaime's other side.

 

Immediately feeling some relief as she watched Tsunade drop to the floor in pain and shock that she'd been struck, Sakura smirked.

 

“You've gotten slow Tsunade-sama. Getting struck by a chuunin can't be good for everyone's view of the all powerful Godaime.”

 

As Tsunade now gave a genuine smile, Sakura was knocked off guard. Had the old woman finally gone mad?

 

“Sakura, congradulations. You've just passed your impromptu jounin exam. No one besides Jiraiya has been able to land a blow on me for years. I never even saw that coming. You've become a true kunoichi, and I am proud of you. I always knew you had great, unrealized potential. The shame of it is that it took Sasuke abusing you to bring it out.”

 

Sakura's mind reeled to a halt at the name. She didn't want to think about him. She didn't want to face him. The Leaf-nin who had slaughtered legendary S-class nin with barely any effort. She couldn't defeat him. It took effort still to spar with Kakashi and she never walked away unscathed as Sasuke had.

 

Sasuke scared her as no one else ever had. And now she had to square off with him.

 

Wearing this completely indecent outfit.

 

Sakura snorted, her anger being replaced with annoyance and a bit of apprehension. “Why thank you Godaime-sama. I cannot possibly express my gratitude at your gift of this title. If you are done fooling around and pissing me off, where the fuck are my other clothes?”

 

Sakura leveled the Godaime sitting on the floor with a look that contained no humor or even room for it.

 

Tsunade sighed.

 

“Sadly, we did cut them off because I knew you would do this. So you are stuck in that outfit because I cannot leave the hospital to purchase you some new ones. Besides, it's getting late and stores are beginning to shut down and people are getting ready to go home. I suggest you get home before he does, and take Shikamaru with you.”

 

Sakura glanced at the jounin. His eyes were still shut tight but he had managed to tone down the blush to a light stain on his cheeks. He looked distinctly uncomfortable and was shifting from foot to foot, his arms crossed across his chest.

 

“Fine,” Sakura snapped. “We'll go. I expected you to be more mature Tsunade-sama. I always thought you were, but now you're no better than that perv Jiraiya.”

 

Sakura turned and grabbed Shikamaru's hand to drag him out of the hospital, not paying attention to inferences people would draw from it.

 

“Just open your eyes Shikamaru. You're going to have to get used to this ridiculous outfit if we plan to fight. I don't need you gawking when you're supposed to be planning.”

 

Shikamaru peeked one eye open as he was forcibly dragged out the front door of the hospital where the sun was beginning to set. His breath caught in his throat as he took in all of Sakura's form. She was right, he would be horribly distracted unless he got used to the outfit. Opening both eyes, he allowed Sakura to guide him through the thinning crowds in the streets, all the while familiarizing himself with her pale skin and curves. She had some faint scar criss-crossing her entire back and some over her arms, but he found that they added to Sakura as a person.

 

What was it with domineering women and him anyways? They always seemed to flock to him, when he didn't really want to deal with any women at all. He sighed and kept telling himself that Sakura was in no way attractive to him and that after this entire ordeal was over, she would move on to someone else and he could live in happy solitude as he had always wanted to.

 

`Liar…'

 

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Sasuke grunted as he finished off with his orgasm, his body slick with sweat caused by both the sex and from the massive amounts of alcohol in his system. The woman beneath him had finished off her herself with a moan of his name, one finger held between her teeth in an attempt to look desirable. He wanted nothing to do with her. All he wanted was her…

 

Sasuke smirked, standing up and dressing himself, leaving the woman pouting on the bed. As he carelessly tossed a wad of cash onto the bed for her, he walked out of the brothel.

 

Tonight…tonight he would get some satisfaction as he hadn't had in years. Sakura would pay for holding back on him. But that payment would only be good if she fought him. He always liked a struggle, a hard fight. But he knew he would win the battle, he would come out on top, like always. He wanted to break Sakura, shatter her.

 

Shatter her like she was shattering his dreams of reviving his clan, like how his whole life had been shattered. He was furious that even with the loss of her family she could keep going. His had died to, but he was stuck in the past. And it wasn't fair. So he would punish her. He would break her, capture her in the genjutsu of his sharingan eye and bring her every fear to life. Break all her dream that seemed to hold the kunoichi together.

 

Yes, tonight was the night, he could feel it. He shivered in almost sexual pleasure as he thought of what he would do. It would be a most gratifying night indeed…

 

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A/N: And end chapter 4. It's nice and long, but that last bit bothers me. Dunno why, but I'll keep it there. Maybe you all will like it. Constructive criticism is always welcome, but flames are not. If you don't like the story, then don't read it much less comment on how much you don't like it. Anyways, some shout-outs to my reviewers!:

 

Romantix- You did reply, but I was going by who had reviewed for the previous chapter. Gomen!

 

AznNarutoGrl-91- Thanks!

 

Shinobi Darkbeak- Thanks!

 

Kerrie-chan- Thanks. Please, keep pointing out things I could work on…it's helpful.

 

ShortySC22- Thanks!

 

jennjennr- I'm flattered and overwhelmed…thank you. I don't think it quite ranks up there with some wonderful stories I've read in this place, but thank you nonetheless.

 

the.promise.kept- Thanks!

 

Dances With The Wind- I just wish I had anyone to hold me…but I agree. It would be nice.

 

BlueKanji- Thanks!

 

Yokaigurl- -sweatdrops- Err…okay…

 

Dustbunny3- I greatly enjoy your constructive criticism. You've no idea how much it can help. Would “crack in the door” have worked better?

 

The Squabbit- Thank you!

 

GaaraSakura Luvers 4Evah- Err…smut this is not. An effed up romance? Most definitely yes. ^^

 

The warmth of the Afterglow- Thanks!