Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Hope ❯ Part 11 ( Chapter 11 )

HOPE 11

The sobs gradually subsided and then it was silence. Iruka was leaning against Kakashi's chest, tears just silently trickling down, his throat sore from all the sobbing. Kakashi still held him tight and close and after a few minutes, he held Iruka at arm's length and peered in to his gaze.

"Feel better?"

Iruka nodded like a child and sniffed cutely that Kakashi wanted to hug him again. "Come on. Leave the work there. Let's get you home."

The trip home was surprisingly fast. Kakashi got rid of Iruka's flak jacket and prepared him a hot bath. Iruka was like a lifeless doll in which Kakashi pulled the strings. He was lost in whatever memory he had in his head and Kakashi could only feel his chest tighten. After he tucked away Iruka in the bed and stood up to leave, Iruka's hand grabbed his sleeve.

"Don't go." He whispered.

The need dripping in that voice was enough to convince the Kakashi. He sat on the spot beside Iruka on the bed and leaned against the headboard. Iruka had not let go of his sleeve and had fallen asleep immediately. Whatever fatigue the man felt was finally catching up. Kakashi smiled and remained in his sitting position, a blush creeping to his cheeks each time he remembered that Iruka was still holding on to his sleeve.

*

Darkness all around him. He felt as if ice was piercing his body. He was falling in to and endless cold shadow. He felt alone and cold.

And tired.

Then there was light above him. But it slowly began to dim and become far away. Whatever warmth he was feeling at the sight of the light, it was quickly being replaced by cold chilling needle like sensations.

"Wait." He called out, falling back again. "Wait." He said more pleadingly, then the light disappeared. "WAIT!"

*

Iruka sat up from the bed with a loud yell, and began to pant heavily. His arms automatically wrapped around himself as he shivered from the cold, and winced. It was a simple dream of darkness and light, yet it affected him so much that he was suddenly afraid of being alone in his house.

A warm touch came upon his shoulder and he felt as if he was sitting in front of a warm fire. "Iruka, it's okay. It's just a dream."

He gave a small nod but leaned against the touch. "Warm." He unconsciously whispered and then he was pulled back down to the pillow. Kakashi gently pulled the covers Iruka and then pulled back his hand from his hold on the man. A whimper escaped Iruka's lips and he peered down at him with concern.

"What's wrong Iruka?" He asked, checking to see if the man was in pain but he just shivered.

Suddenly, Iruka turned to his side and pillowed his head on Kakashi flat stomach. Kakashi's eyes widened so much that he was surprised that they did not fall out yet. Iruka's eyes closed almost instantly the moment he was curled around Kakashi's torso, a smile gracing his lips as he fell in to a dreamless sleep. There were not harsh touches ghosting over his skin, no pain in his muscles or that foul taste in his mouth. No haunting memories that plagued his mind. He was just warm. Happy and warm.

"You're so warm." He whispered and Kakashi blushed very red.

But watching Iruka sleep and curled around him for that matter made Kakashi feel as if he was the king of the world. Even though he felt his shoulders begin to go numb from staying in one position, he ignored it and rubbed gentle circles around Iruka's back.

Soon, he too fell asleep.

*

It was a lazy Saturday weekend. Kakashi woke up and found Iruka still asleep on his stomach quite snugly. Kakashi could no longer feel his arms but it had been worthwhile. He moved a bit, just to change the position he was in and this caused Iruka to wake up, much to his chagrin.

Kakashi did not say a word until Iruka yawned and released his hold on the supposed `warm pillow'. He sat up and yawned, stretching and giving out a pleasured sigh when his tired bones cracked. He then turned to face Kakashi and gave him a glowing smile, the sunlight shining upon him, making him look like a divine creature. Kakashi felt the urge to just press his lips upon those smiling ones but instead he brushed a lock of hair that fell on Iruka's face and tucked it behind his ears.

"You look well rested." Kakashi said, and smiled from under his mask. Kakashi then found Iruka give a serious expression and then it morphed to a sad one.

"I'm sorry Kakashi-sensei." Kakashi blinked and wondered why Iruka was apologizing. "I'm sorry that I was so rude and harsh to you before. I did not hate you and I want to apologize for making you feel awkward or uncomfortable during your stay here with me for three months." Kakashi did not even remember to blink. "I guess I was just afraid."

A long silence then Kakashi shifted his position in the bed. "Afraid of what?"

Iruka stood up from the bed and headed for the door. He did not answer Kakashi's question. He just left the room then the apartment to go for a long run around the village.

*

Kakashi declined all missions for the next one week, asking for a break from Tsunade, in which it was granted. Kakashi did not trust himself to go in to life-risking missions in his current state of mind. Everything he saw, felt and heard all traced back to one single thread of thought.

Umino Iruka.

He left Iruka's house as soon as Iruka went for his run. He went to the Hokage mountain carvings and sat on top of the 4th's head. There, he began to think and came to one decision by the time it was late evening. He found himself marching across town towards Iruka's apartment and when he reached it, he stopped in front of the door.

What he was about to do will determine how his life will be from that evening on.

*

The doorbell rang and Iruka set the TV guide down and got up from his comfortable spot in the couch. He approached the door removing the bolts and pulling it open only to stare wide eyed at the Jounin by his doorstep.

"Good evening Kakashi-sensei." He greeted, his sweet and polite voice ringing loudly in Kakashi's ears.

"Iruka, I need to talk to you."

"Of course." He said and allowed him inside to the living room. Iruka turned the TV off and sat opposite Kakashi. He waited for Kakashi to speak but when no words came for several minutes, Iruka began to panic. He was glad Kakashi came for he wanted to see him and just be with him. He felt sad when he came home after his run to find him gone and now that he was here, he felt like something was wrong. Kakashi was probably going to tell him that he couldn't afford to be attached to someone or that he did not really forgive him for the ill-treatment he got or maybe something along those lines.

"Iruka, about last night." He began and Iruka found himself clasping his hands together. He did not want to admit directly how he longed for the man sitting in front of him. Just a simple touch was enough to chase his demons away. He wanted to be touched - by none other that Hatake Kakashi. "You wouldn't let me come near you and then last night happened." Iruka swallowed a lump the size of a fist. "I want to know why. Why did you let me close last night?" Kakashi then looked up at him, his hitai ate pulled up, revealing two narrowed eyes. "Because if its just one of your acts then best let me know. You're not the only affected one here."

Iruka felt afraid from the gaze Kakashi was piercing him with. From fear, he began to tremble and tried to steady himself by looking away. "Because you drove my demons away. You being close is enough for me to stop having nightmares about what happened." Iruka found that his knees were suddenly blurring. "At first, I really couldn't stand you being close, because I did not know your intentions. You were bigger and stronger and your shadow scared me. But when you stayed and when you t-took care of me, I - I began to see you differently." He then tightened his hands together. "I don't hate you Kakashi. I don't hate your presence or your touch."

"Iruka -"

"I was just afraid that I -" Kakashi sat beside him and placed a hand on his clenched ones. "-That I'd fall for you." He then noticed the hand on top of his and wished that it would just stay there. The hand left his and came to his face instead, making him turn to face the Jounin.

"Don't be afraid." He said and wiped the tears away. "Don't ever be afraid. I will never hurt you." He then pressed a light cloth-covered kiss at the back of Iruka's hands.

"Kakashi-sensei." Iruka whispered looking at him with longing. "May I remove your mask?" Kakashi guided Iruka's fingers to his mask and allowed it to be tugged down. When his face was fully exposed, Iruka stared at him with his eyes shining with a smile.

Kakashi pulled his gloves off and cupped Iruka's face. He began to trace his eyes slowly, then his nose. He dropped one of his hands to his neck while the other dropped to Iruka's lips, tracing the soft slightly pink flesh with his thumb. Iruka did not complain and closed his eyes slowly, letting Kakashi's touch do wonders to him. Kakashi was marveling at Iruka's beautiful face and then he could not help it anymore. He slowly tilted Iruka's head side ways and pressed his lips to Iruka's. Iruka did not pull away and this made Kakashi bolder. He nipped at Iruka's lower lip, seeking permission when the mouth before him parted. He slid his tongue slowly in to Iruka's warm cavern, tasting every inch of his flavor. Iruka was sweet and the pleasurable blinded Kakashi. Iruka himself was feeling like melting butter from the way Kakashi worked his lips against his. It surprised Iruka that he did not remember anything that happened to him nearly five months ago. It was only Kakashi in front of him and his reality revolved solely against him for the next several minutes.

Kakashi pulled back to suck in a breath before pulling Iruka in to another kiss. This time, it was fast, needy and hungry. Iruka then whimpered when Kakashi got a bit too demanding and pulled away from the kiss, some fear creeping in to his eyes and mind. Kakashi wanted to kick himself in the head. He had to be patient.

"I'm sorry." Kakashi said and Iruka merely made a small whimpering noise. "I did not mean to be rough. It's just that -" Iruka looked at him slowly. "You have no idea how much I've been wanting this." He then buried his head in his hands. "Wanting you."

Iruka felt the heat rush up to his face.

TBC

HA! Right in the middle of the action! Wee! So? So? So? Steamy! Steamy! Steamy! Damn, I got my head in the gutter!

Tune in next time!