Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Journey to the West: The Naruto Version ❯ Hey Look! It's The Fox King's Prologue of Doom!! (Laser attachments sold seperately.) ( Chapter 1 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: MelonBear 
The birth of the fox king. and his trials of interacting with humans.
now where's me toothpick.
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Action / Adventure / Comedy / Hentai | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 08.15.2007 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.4K | Visits: 376 | Status: Work In Progress
The birth of the fox king. and his trials of interacting with humans.
now where's me toothpick.
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Action / Adventure / Comedy / Hentai | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 08.15.2007 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.4K | Visits: 376 | Status: Work In Progress
Ok this is the first fic I have posted online. I originally posted this on AFF but I had
Not received any reviews so far. Since I have a strange sense of humor this fic will also probably have a strange sense of humor. Though it doesn't begin to show until chapter 3
(which I am currently working on.)
A/N: don't own Naruto or Journey to the West.
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Chapter 1: Hey look it's the Fox King's Prologue
of Doom!
In the beginning, there was no light and there was no darkness. There was no existence and no non-existence. Then when the heavenly body known as Yin mixed with the opposite body Yang, they had intercourse and brought upon the three worlds: the world of the heavenly deities, the world of man, and the world of mischievous demons.
These worlds were meant to be forever separated from each other, but that all changed with the coming of the golden egg. No one is sure if the egg came from the land of the deities or the land of the demons, all they knew was that it did not belong in the realm of man. For exactly nine hundred years the egg rested isolated on top of the mountain known as “Kitsune Mountain”. Yet one day the egg had finally began to hatch, and when it had finally hatched it revealed a boy who possessed nine silk-like fox tails, which where colored with a rich creamy white, until it turned into the color of a fire-like amber at the tip of each tail. When the boy opened his eyes for the first time in his life two beams of golden light shot out of each of his eyes, and throughout the realm of man these two golden beams of light could be seen. The boy then let out a shout that is said to be heard throughout all three realms of existence. The one word the boy shouted was
“DATTEBAYO!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Thus the fox-boy was born, the beams of light from his eyes finally receded back into the sky, one beam becoming the sun, the other the moon. The fox-boy lived on the mountain for exactly one hundred years, his only companions being the various foxes that lived on the mountain. But over the years he grew restless and for the first time in his life he left the mountain, and thus he began to wander the realm of man, eventually learning their language and well….. sort of learning their customs….. in a twisted strange interpretive way. Well let's just look at one instance of this shall we.
It was a warm spring day. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom causing it to rain cherry petals around the village. Nearby the fox boy who has so modestly named himself The Wonderful and Handsome Fox King, who just learned the language of man, was struck with awe at the sight of the village. Sure he had seen villages before, but none of them were this big or beautiful. Of course the Fox King had yet to realize that humans aren't used to seeing people with nine fox tails, so thus he did not bother to hide them.
“YO!!!” shouted the Fox King as he approached a teenaged boy in the village.
“uhh…….hello?” said the boy while giving the Fox King a strange look, but of course he's doing this because the King is so friendly, and definitely not because of the fox tails.
“ Hey….. you didn't run?? YES!! After months of training in the arts of human interaction I have finally managed success!” shouted a joyful fox king as he then started jumping around flashing the sign for victory.
“Uhh….well I'll be going now then…” said the boy as he began to slowly walk away from the hyper king.
“WAIT!! Don't go! I really need your help! This is a case of life or death.” Stated the fox king.
“Are you certain? Because if you are, then I will be obliged under my honor to help my fellow man.” Stated the boy with a serious tone.
“Yes, I haven't been more certain of anything in my life.” Replied the fox king.
Well then, what is your problem then?” inquired the boy as he furrowed his brow.
As then the fox king, hearing the boy's words, glanced to both of his sides as he then whispered to the boy.
“ Can…. You show me how humans use the bathroom?” asked the fox king with all seriousness.
The boy after hearing his words could only stare at the fox king in disbelief as a huge sweat drop ran down the back of his head.
“Well cause I know how foxes go, you know I lean against a tree and piss on it, and if I have to crap I just go on the ground and watch as someone steps in it and then I laugh…… wait maybe that's how dogs do it…. Well whatever, you see in the all the villages I went to before…. I would go to the bathroom and then the villagers would get mad and chase me out of the village……so I guess I'm just not doing it right…..so will you be my “human crapping sensei?” said a rather winded fox king after he rambled on about his toilet problems.
After about another ten seconds the boy finally replied by pointing at the fox king and shouting “HENTAI!!!!!”
At hearing this, the other villagers in the area all looked at the boy and the fox king with curious looks in their expressions.
“This hentai wants me to watch him take a crap even though I'm not into that kind of thing!!” shouted the boy.
“This is a serious hentai offense…..even though we all know he is in fact very into that kind of stuff.” Said one of the villagers as the other villagers all nodded in agreement.
“Look I told you all before, that guy was happening to sleep walking and in his sleep walking he began to take a crap on my chest while I was sleeping!....... wait that doesn't matter now!!! We still have this hentai here!” shouted the boy again as he pointed at the fox king.
“Well…We all still got three minutes till are instant ramen is done so….. let's get the hentai!” shouted one of the villagers as the rest of them grabbed there pitchforks and torches…..*sigh* how cliché.
And that's one example of how the Wonderful and Handsome Fox King learned human customs. Yea, I'm well aware he didn't learn anything, but also didn't he learn everything?? Oh, yea…. Just to let you know the fox king escaped, and for the rest of his life he would always cringe once he heard the word bathroom.
TBC
of Doom!
In the beginning, there was no light and there was no darkness. There was no existence and no non-existence. Then when the heavenly body known as Yin mixed with the opposite body Yang, they had intercourse and brought upon the three worlds: the world of the heavenly deities, the world of man, and the world of mischievous demons.
These worlds were meant to be forever separated from each other, but that all changed with the coming of the golden egg. No one is sure if the egg came from the land of the deities or the land of the demons, all they knew was that it did not belong in the realm of man. For exactly nine hundred years the egg rested isolated on top of the mountain known as “Kitsune Mountain”. Yet one day the egg had finally began to hatch, and when it had finally hatched it revealed a boy who possessed nine silk-like fox tails, which where colored with a rich creamy white, until it turned into the color of a fire-like amber at the tip of each tail. When the boy opened his eyes for the first time in his life two beams of golden light shot out of each of his eyes, and throughout the realm of man these two golden beams of light could be seen. The boy then let out a shout that is said to be heard throughout all three realms of existence. The one word the boy shouted was
“DATTEBAYO!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Thus the fox-boy was born, the beams of light from his eyes finally receded back into the sky, one beam becoming the sun, the other the moon. The fox-boy lived on the mountain for exactly one hundred years, his only companions being the various foxes that lived on the mountain. But over the years he grew restless and for the first time in his life he left the mountain, and thus he began to wander the realm of man, eventually learning their language and well….. sort of learning their customs….. in a twisted strange interpretive way. Well let's just look at one instance of this shall we.
It was a warm spring day. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom causing it to rain cherry petals around the village. Nearby the fox boy who has so modestly named himself The Wonderful and Handsome Fox King, who just learned the language of man, was struck with awe at the sight of the village. Sure he had seen villages before, but none of them were this big or beautiful. Of course the Fox King had yet to realize that humans aren't used to seeing people with nine fox tails, so thus he did not bother to hide them.
“YO!!!” shouted the Fox King as he approached a teenaged boy in the village.
“uhh…….hello?” said the boy while giving the Fox King a strange look, but of course he's doing this because the King is so friendly, and definitely not because of the fox tails.
“ Hey….. you didn't run?? YES!! After months of training in the arts of human interaction I have finally managed success!” shouted a joyful fox king as he then started jumping around flashing the sign for victory.
“Uhh….well I'll be going now then…” said the boy as he began to slowly walk away from the hyper king.
“WAIT!! Don't go! I really need your help! This is a case of life or death.” Stated the fox king.
“Are you certain? Because if you are, then I will be obliged under my honor to help my fellow man.” Stated the boy with a serious tone.
“Yes, I haven't been more certain of anything in my life.” Replied the fox king.
Well then, what is your problem then?” inquired the boy as he furrowed his brow.
As then the fox king, hearing the boy's words, glanced to both of his sides as he then whispered to the boy.
“ Can…. You show me how humans use the bathroom?” asked the fox king with all seriousness.
The boy after hearing his words could only stare at the fox king in disbelief as a huge sweat drop ran down the back of his head.
“Well cause I know how foxes go, you know I lean against a tree and piss on it, and if I have to crap I just go on the ground and watch as someone steps in it and then I laugh…… wait maybe that's how dogs do it…. Well whatever, you see in the all the villages I went to before…. I would go to the bathroom and then the villagers would get mad and chase me out of the village……so I guess I'm just not doing it right…..so will you be my “human crapping sensei?” said a rather winded fox king after he rambled on about his toilet problems.
After about another ten seconds the boy finally replied by pointing at the fox king and shouting “HENTAI!!!!!”
At hearing this, the other villagers in the area all looked at the boy and the fox king with curious looks in their expressions.
“This hentai wants me to watch him take a crap even though I'm not into that kind of thing!!” shouted the boy.
“This is a serious hentai offense…..even though we all know he is in fact very into that kind of stuff.” Said one of the villagers as the other villagers all nodded in agreement.
“Look I told you all before, that guy was happening to sleep walking and in his sleep walking he began to take a crap on my chest while I was sleeping!....... wait that doesn't matter now!!! We still have this hentai here!” shouted the boy again as he pointed at the fox king.
“Well…We all still got three minutes till are instant ramen is done so….. let's get the hentai!” shouted one of the villagers as the rest of them grabbed there pitchforks and torches…..*sigh* how cliché.
And that's one example of how the Wonderful and Handsome Fox King learned human customs. Yea, I'm well aware he didn't learn anything, but also didn't he learn everything?? Oh, yea…. Just to let you know the fox king escaped, and for the rest of his life he would always cringe once he heard the word bathroom.
TBC
Sorry about any grammar mistakes. (I don't have a beta)
Also just to point out about the narraration's weird style, it's not that I'm lazy
I just think it adds an extra funny point of view to the story.
Please Review!! I need feedback to know if I should continue or just
give up on the fic.