Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Kokoro no Kizu, Wounds of the Heart ❯ Chapter 6 ( Chapter 6 )

Chapter 6

 

* * * Naruto's POV

 

I reached out into the empty space where Sasuke stood. His scent wafted in on a cool night breeze. I breathed it wishing he were there. I missed his grasp and touch. The aftertaste of his kiss still lingered on my lips where he kissed me. His tongue, his teeth on my skin, it felt great. Whenever we grew close like that a strange thing happened. At first I thought it was a feeling. Then right before Sasuke left I realized it was a physical reaction that occurred in the body. Sasuke said I'd figure it out but the truth is I'm not smart like him. Maybe Iruka would understand what this was about.

 

Iruka shut the front door as he passed me on his way the bathroom. “I'm going to take a bath since it's late. Let me know if you need anything.”

 

“Sensei, I have a question.” Then I hesitated.

 

He turned back pausing in the bathroom doorway. “Yes, Naruto?”

 

Silence. Suddenly I felt too embarrassed, stupid to ask him about what happened to me when Sasuke and I became intimate. “Nothing,” I said at last.

 

“Well, whatever it is, if you want to talk about it, I'm here for you.” Iruka's gentle voice and tender expression reassured me that he cared.

 

I couldn't believe that I didn't trust the father figure who acknowledged my existence and rescued me from the hell of being alone. If it wasn't for him I'd be unloved, lonely and hated as the village outcast and nine tales fox demon.

 

“Wait.” I ran up to him and burrowed my head into chest.

 

Iruka knelt over and hugged me. “It's going to be okay, Naruto. How about a nice hot bath? You'll feel much better.”

 

“Okay.” I took Iruka's hand and joined him.

 

In Japanese culture most children take their baths with their father or mother until they are in the upper grades of elementary school. The family tub is an important place for parent-child communication. But I lived alone so there was no one to talk with. It felt nice to be in another person's company. I think I began to understand what a sense of family was.

 

We entered the changing room, which functioned as a transitional space between the bathing area and the rest of the apartment in the traditional Japanese style. The changing had a sink and mirror for grooming and brushing one's teeth. Here, people undressed and dried off after a bath.

 

Iruka untied the forehead protector fastened under his ponytail laying it on the dresser below the mirror. A few strands of hair tumbled free across his forehead. He pulled out the hair band and thick black locks fell to his shoulders. Suntanned hands grasped the bottom of the shirt he pulled off over his head. Blue pants gathered on the floor. Dim yellow light struck the bare body from the side, outlining its right half. Further in along the smooth contours of muscle, subtle shades of pink and yellow played next to each other. The white highlights in areas closest to the light source broke up the interplay of yellow and pink, creating a stark contrast against the darker parts of the body.

 

“Hey Naruto. Are you coming?” Iruka questioned, folding his clothes.

 

“Um, yes.” Unlike Iruka who took his time I threw everything off. I gazed at my thin, lightly muscled figure in the mirror. Iruka's build was strong and athletic with well-defined muscles, the way a ninja should be. “I wish I could be strong like you, Sensei. Then maybe the villagers will respect me. ”

 

“You're already strong,” said Iruka proudly. “In here.” He laid a hand over my heart, its touch warm and caring. “You've suffered a lot and that's made you compassionate. I believe that is real strength, Naruto.”

 

“Really, Iruka-sensei?” I forced slight smile not to disappoint him. He spent so time with me after class, took me to Ichiraku, helped me out with Sasuke and made me ramen. He's been such a great friend and father figure. “But Sensei, I meant physical strength.”

 

“Oh, that? I'm not that strong. Just ordinary,” Iruka remarked, never thinking highly of himself like Sasuke or a natural born genius might. “So no one really paid attention to me. Like you, Naruto, I did anything I could to get attention. I wanted everyone to like me. But in the end I learned that it's a few close friends who accept you for who you are that matters.”

 

“And who accepted you, Iruka-sensei?” I asked, while following him into the bathing area.

 

A frosted glass door separated the changing room from the bathing area. The glass door was completely waterproof, so that water could splash anywhere in the bathing area. Light blue tiles lined the walls and floor. Above the bathtub facet a control panel controlled the water temperature in the tub below.

 

Iruka fumbled with the control panel to find the right temperature setting. He answered my question. “Who accepted me? Hokage-sama did. When I was your age after my parents died I visited their grave often. I tried not to cry because I didn't want to be weak. But Hokage-sama knew that I cried alone and tried to hide my pain. He said, `It's okay if you feel your pain, Iruka,' accepting me for who I was.”

 

“Just as you accepted me, Sensei. When you gave me my forehead protector, you acknowledged my existence. I finally knew someone cared and that gave me a reason to live,” I said, turning on the faucet in the washing area outside the tub after Iruka adjusted the temperature.

 

He moved by the running water under the faucet to feel its temperature. He nodded. Just right. “If someone doesn't care then a person feels lonely and unloved. Without love what reason does a person have to exist? Not knowing the reason of your existence is the most painful thing in the world.”

 

“It sure is,” I agreed, wetting my hair under the faucet of hot water. “If you never accepted me, I don't know what I would of done…” I couldn't finish. Pain choked my voice.

 

“It's alright, Naruto. Come over here.” Iruka squeezed shampoo in his hand and lathered it into my hair. “We each have friends that care about us, right?” A slight smile spread across his face, reflected in the softening of his eyes. “Isn't that what matters?”

 

“Yes!” I replied, rinsing my head under the faucet. “Would you accept your friends no matter what, Iruka-sensei?”

 

“Of course, don't be silly,” Iruka laughed, washing and rinsing off as well. “A person who really loves you, be it family or close friends always does, so you have nothing to worry about.”

 

I knew then I could trust Iruka whole-heartedly. I'd ask some things later after we settled in the tub. We entered it lowering ourselves in steaming water up to our neck. The hot water absorbed the lemony scent of hinoki wood carried on the steam we breathed in. Heat crept into our muscles soothing aches and pains. It also brought the blood right under the skin turning it red. The heat around our bodies gave way to a warm, relaxing sensation.

 

“This is wonderful, Naruto, it cleanses the soul,” exclaimed Iruka, sinking in deeper to his chin.

 

“Sure does.” I relaxed, inhaling the sweet scent of hinoki. I sank in further, tilting my head back against the tub's rim. “Hey, sensei. How do you feel when you like someone and…you're close to them?”

 

Iruka thought for a moment. “You mean romantically, right Naruto?”

 

“Yes, sensei,” I said quietly, just above a whisper. I've always hated being different. The fact I like Sasuke and he's a guy makes it even worse.

 

“Naruto, I know you've liked Sasuke for a long time. And that's okay. A person, who really loves you, accepts you for who you are. And I accept you.” Iruka's lips curved into a full, broad smile.

 

I returned his tender expression, wading closer to him in the tub. “Thank you for all of your kindness, Iruka-sensei.”

 

“As long as my son is happy, so am I.” Iruka winked, placing a hand on my shoulder.

 

After we left the tub Iruka covered it over to save the water for soaking later. In the changing room a sudden chill blasted our bodies. The blood under our skin retreated back into muscle and flesh, leaving us fresh and cool. A clean, light scent permeated the room from the hinoki water we soaked in.

 

Iruka dressed in dark blue pajamas and tossed me an oversized T-shirt that reached my knees.

 

“What's this?” I mumbled, slipping into it.

 

“For you to sleep in, Naruto. It's late so you're going to crash here for the night.” Iruka yawned, leading me into the main room.

 

“But you don't have Konoha's Ninja Brand Milk in your fridge, Sensei. How can I stay over and have breakfast?” I blabbered.

 

From a small closet he rolled out a large futon by laid the end of his. Both futons took up nearly all-available floor space. As Iruka spread out some comforters he rolled his eyes back and sighed. “I'll buy it in the morning. Now into bed.”

 

He tucked me in bed, turned out the lights and said goodnight. An impenetrable blackness cloaked the room. Only the sound of our breathing and the tapping of rain again broke the silence.

 

I couldn't sleep. “Hey, Iruka-sensei.”

 

“Yes, Naruto-kun?” he answered sleepily.

 

“I still have a question,” I reminded him. “What's it like to be close to…someone? No, that's not right. I felt strange when Sasuke kissed me. And it scared me too.”

 

Iruka collected his thoughts, and then spoke. “Naruto, the reaction you experienced when you're around someone you're physically attracted to is called arousal. It's perfectly normal.”

 

“It's n…normal? Arousal? Never heard of it. Explain it, Iruka-sensei.”

 

“Well, your heart beats faster, muscles tense, and you get a tingly feeling all over your body. Blood flow increases to certain parts of your body, stays there and suddenly all your attention gets drawn there. When you kiss someone its common that this happens,” explained Iruka calmly. “Besides, Naruto, you're at the age when hormones kick in. At first it may seem out of control if it's spontaneous, then as you get used to it, it doesn't bother you as much…”

 

I swallowed feeling my throat tighten. “Iruka-sensei, is it something to feel bad about?”

 

“No,” Iruka chuckled, beginning to doze off. “Its just part of growing up and being a man. You'll understand it, as you grow older. Goodnight, Naruto-kun.”

 

“Night, Iruka-sensei.”

 

TBC