Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Naruto: The Linkin Park Chronicles ❯ Pushing Me Away ( Chapter 1 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: Zagger the Bloody Angel 
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Action | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 02.02.2008 | Updated On: 02.03.2008 | Pages: 4 | Words: 5.2K | Visits: 2.3K | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Action | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 02.02.2008 | Updated On: 02.03.2008 | Pages: 4 | Words: 5.2K | Visits: 2.3K | Status: Work In Progress
A/N: This is another joint project by both us, as every fic on her will be. Now this will cut into our other stories on our profiles, but this one is worth it. Now remember when I put the lyrics in as of now, it's only the main vocalist as there is no background singers. I'm not going to say anything more, just sit back and relax and enjoy this fic.
We Do Not Own Naruto or the Copy Rights to Linkin Park and their songs. This is pure fiction, so please do not sue.
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It was early mourning in the hospital. It was peaceful in the large building, mainly because everyone was asleep as the Sasuke retrieval team were now officially out of the critical zone. Each one had a difficult fight that they nearly lost and died in the process.
Shikamaru was the least injured of the group as he only had a broken thumb, but if Temari had not had shown up, he would have had his throat slit. The one in the next best condition was Lee. He wasn't originally part of the group, but he had came in time as Naruto was about to fight Kimimaro. In the end he was saved by Gaara.
Kiba was the middle man of the group. He had a few self inflicted wound as if he had tried to commit suppuku to get the weird brother Ukon out of his skin. If Kankuro didn't show up at the last seconds, he himself would have died.
Neji was in critical condition when he arrived in the hospital. He had two large holes through his chest and stomach after his fight with Kidomaru. In the end, his suicidal strategy had paid off as he delivered a jyuken strike to his head, ending the spider like man's life.
Chouji was in the worst condition of the five. He had taken the three experimental Akimichi pills to defeat his opponent. He did so as the pill increase his reserves beyond anything ever seen before, even opening the eight gate. But the price for this was the toxicity of the final pill would kill him. If he had not coughed up a chunk of it, he wouldn't have survived.
Everyone was glad the four of them pulled through, but everyone except for a few really cared about the last one that was lying in a room of his own, looking out at the rising sun. His blonde hair shined brightly as the sun hit it as his electric blue eyes gazed at it as he couldn't get any sleep. The reason being his fight with the teen he considered his brother.
The truth was, he was in worse shape than the others, maybe other than Chouji. When he had arrived on Kakashi's back, he had severe lacerations covering his body, a few puncture wounds, mass chakra depletion and one wound that was healed on the outside, but the inside was still injured. The final strike of Sasuke's that nicked his heart.
On the way back, he kept fading in and out as he kept seeing images of his life. These images haunted him so. They ranged from his beatings to his few happier moments with the Sandaime, Iruka or old man Ichiraku. Remembering everything that he lived through his life, a tear drop slowly slid down his cheek. He wanted to blame the fox, but for some reason, he knew it wasn't completely at fault.
He sighed a bit more as he rubbed his heart, still feeling the phantom pain from where Sasuke's hand had nicked his heart. He through the window and noticed the people beginning to walk through the streets down below. His face became crestfallen as he looked at them, as they were the same people that had been pushing him away all his life.
As he continued looking out the window, one of the songs he had been writing when he couldn't get some sleep seeped into his mind and heart. His eyes water a bit before wiping them away before he began to sing, not knowing his teammate was at his door and about to knock.
I've lied to you
The same way that I always do
This is the last smile
That I'll fake for the sake of being with you.
From outside, Sakura was about to knock when she heard the singing from the other side of the door. At first she was surprised at this, but remembering an event not to long ago, she decided to wait to knock and pressed her ear to the door to listen more to Naruto's startling voice.
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
The sacrifice is never knowing
Sakura was stunned at the clarity of his voice as she really never did suspect Naruto to be a good singer. But this was better than she ever dreamt of. Hell, she doubted that some of the bands she listen to sounded this good.
Why I never walked away?
Why I played myself this way?
Now I see, you testing me, pushes me away.
Sakura felt a pang of guilt enter her heart as she heard him sing this and repeat the last three lines. 'Is this how he truly feels? What made you this way Naruto?'
I've tried like you
To do everything you wanted too
This is the last time
I'll take the blame for the sake of being with you
Sakura now felt even worse than before. She had already know that Naruto hadn't managed to bring Sasuke back as that was the first place she tried to get out of the nurse. When she found out that he hadn't brought him back, she was mad at first, but then realized that she wasn't able to keep him here either and that Naruto had given everything he had to bring him back.
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
The sacrifice is never knowing
Why I never walked away?
Why I played myself this way?
Now I see, you testing me, pushes me away.
Why I never walked away?
Why I played myself this way?
Now I see, your testing me, pushes me away.
At this, Sakura cringed even more as she slowly began to walk away from the door. She didn't know why, but she could feel this was coming from Naruto's heart. And that was disturbing her.
He was always the happy-go-lucky, wannabe Hokage that brighten everyone's day, even if they didn't know it. And to see him like this, was nearly maddening for her. She could no longer take it as he began to repeat the chorus and ran off crying, passing by a shocked Kakashi.
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
The sacrifice is never knowing
Why I never walked away?
Why I played myself this way?
Now I see, you testing me, pushes me away.
Why I never walked away?
Why I played myself this way?
Now I see, your testing me, pushes me away.
Naruto finished singing as another tear drop fell from his eye and wiped it off quickly as he heard someone knock on the door. Once he was sure he was ready, he would have told them to come in, but they had already invited them self in. He refrain from growling at the cycloptic jounin as he had no sense of respect if he didn't at least wait till the person called him in.
Kakashi on the other was more worried about his other student at the moment than that. He hadn't liked the fact that Sakura passed him and was crying her heart out as if something precious from her was taken away. He wasn't sure what happened, but he was going to get it from the source as she came from Naruto's room.
"Naruto. What just happened here? I saw Sakura running away as if she was just told Sasuke had died in the mission."
Naruto's eyes widened hearing this. 'Sakura-chan was here? Why didn't she enter?... Wait... She didn't hear me sing did she?!'
Seeing the look on his student's face was helping. It seemed he had either no clue, or was trying to look clueless. It was hard to tell with him at times. He would have to guess the last one as a look of realization began to hit him. He wasn't exactly pleased at this, seeing as one of his student's was gone and the other was currently crying. He wasn't pinning the blame on Naruto for Sasuke leaving, but he had something to do with Sakura's condition.
"Naruto. What did you say to her?"
The blonde haired jinchuuriki looked up at him in confusion as he hadn't said a single thing to Sakura. Hell, he didn't even know that she was at the door listening to him. "Kakashi-sensei, I have no clue what your talking about. I haven't even seen Sakura-chan today, otherwise I would have a lump on my head."
Kakashi refrained from sweat dropping at that. It was unfortunately true that she did hit him everyday, but he still didn't believe him hundred percent. He was sure Naruto had to have done something with Sakura, but now he was beginning to wonder what happened. "Okay, then what happened to her to make her cry like that Naruto?"
Naruto was becoming tired of Kakashi's questions and he didn't want to tell him that she most have caught him singing the song from his heart. Growling a bit, Naruto responded to his question. "How should I know? In fact, why should I care?! Our normally greeting is me getting to taste concrete as she pounds my head into the ground!"
The cycloptic jounin flinched at Naruto's tone and truth to the statement, but he could feel something was bothering his student and now he wanted to know what. And seeing Naruto was going to tell him, he wasn't going to press the issue any further as he seemed to be in a bad mood. "Naruto, be that as it may, I want you to apologize to Sakura."
"Apologize?! Apologize for what?! I didn't do anything! So why do I have to apologize for something I didn't do?!" Naruto growled louder at his sensei, nearing the volume of a yell.
Kakashi was startled by this. Naruto was not one to get angered easily. He was beginning to think that using that much of Kyuubi's chakra had it's side effects as he answered in a calm tone. "Naruto. I'm not telling you to, I'm ordering you to. Otherwise I'll kick you off the team if you keep acting like this."
Naruto growled even louder at the jounin in front of him. He had to catch him at the worst time possible as his patience was already extremely thin with what had happened over the past couple of days. "Team? What team! There has never been a team! It has always been Sasuke this, Sakura that. What about me?! You have done nothing other than teach me tree walking and then pushed me an incompetent teacher! I was lucky that I ran into Ero-sennin otherwise I would have been creamed, possibly killed by Neji!"
Kakashi knew something was wrong now as his heart felt a pang of guilt from this. He knew it to be true and felt horrible for it. But he had plans to train Naruto after the Chunin Exams to make up for it, but with the Oto/Suna invasion, he had to put them on hold as they had to rebuild and be called on higher missions than they should take. He was about to answer him, but apparently Naruto wasn't finished yet.
"And then, after I get back from rescuing Baa-chan and get dragged into a fight with Sasuke, you had the audacity to question Ero-sennin for teaching me the Rasengan, which I might add if I didn't learn, both Baa-chan and I would be dead! You completely neglected that Sasuke used Chidori as I built an incomplete Rasengan!"
Kakashi's face had gone pale at these revelations and had lost his answer as Naruto continued on with his rant.
"Oh, did I mention I was hit by that jutsu once when I was fighting him in the Valley of the End! And then when you showed up, you checked up on me and then looked to Pakkun, who I quote, said that he couldn't follow the scent any longer! You never were worried for me! You were worried about your prized student! The only reason why you brought me back was because you couldn't follow Sasuke any longer! But guess what, if I hadn't been brought in when I was, I would have been dead! All you have to do is look at those charts and it tells you!"
If he wasn't pale before, Kakashi was now as he looked like Orochimaru with silver hair and in a mask. He hadn't believed Naruto to have been conscious then. But the information that he would have died he found startling. He had saw no life threatening wound on the jinchuuriki, so he didn't think he was that bad of a condition. Did he miss something?
"Naruto... I'm..."
"Your what?! Sorry! It's too late for that Kakashi-sensei! I quit this team." Naruto quickly stood up from the bed and grabbed his clothes faster than Kakashi could react due to his overstrained mind and jumped out of the window.
His eyes widened as he rushed to the window entrance and looked around for him, only to see he was nowhere in sight. He cursed slightly as he turned around and was about to run out when he decided to look at the reports. His eyes widen as he quickly read through them and cursed himself out loud. He was telling the truth.
Dropping them, he quickly ran out the building with speeds showing why he was an Anbu captain, heading for the Hokage's Tower. He was going to need some help and a miracle to find and convince Naruto to stay on his team now, and another to keep from Tsunade from turning him into a meat pancake.
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Naruto busted his door down, not caring at the moment as he headed to the bathroom and took a quick whiz and changed his clothes before walking back out. He looked around his room and found his pack and grabbed it. He didn't care that they would mark him a nukenin. He was leaving this village. It had pushed him too far and he knew he didn't belong here.
He thought for a few moments on staying for the sake of Tsunade, Jiraiya, Sarutobi, Teuchi, Ayame and Iruka. He knew each would miss him greatly and the same would go for him. But, they would understand why he left. Each of them knew what life he lived here and wouldn't hold it against them. Sure they would try to bring him back, but that's what true friends and family did. So he decided leaving was the best course of action.
After he decided this, he went around the room for stuff he wanted to keep with him. Of course he had to have his ramen and kettle as he couldn't live without the said food, but what next. That was quickly answered as he grabbed a few scrolls that he had copied from Ero-sennin's real notes, not the perverted ones he always writes.
Once he made sure he had them, he went through his ninja supplies and took what he needed in his pouches and put a few in his pack for spares. Other than that, he really couldn't find anything else that he wanted to keep with him other than a few set of clothes, which always keep in his pack anyways.
Shrugging his shoulders, he was about to jump through the window when he noticed the papers on his desk. Taking a quick look at them, he noticed it was the songs that he would write when he couldn't fall asleep or would wake up in the middle of the night. Looking over them, he noticed that they where how he really felt about the village and his life.
He closed his eyes and held them closely to them before packing them carefully as he didn't want to leave them, or have anyone finding them. He quickly zipped up his pack and jumped out of the window as he headed for the north wall as it was the least guarded.
Luckily for him, no one noticed him as he headed in that direction, probably since they were all grieving over the lose of the last loyal Uchiha. The thought burned deeply into his mind. They really didn't care for him, but more for his bloodline. If Sasuke wasn't an Uchiha, no one would have ever cared. Maybe that's why he left. He didn't want to be sought after as I tool, but for himself.
Shaking that thought off, he reached the north wall and noticed something. No one was there. This was puzzling him. Why was no one here? It made no sense. Deciding to take a look around, he jumped on the wall and noticed why no one was here.
It was because they were all dead.
'It looks like they were hit with that spider web the spider guy used and finished off by being crushed, stabbed or... I don't even know what the hell happened to him. Looks like he was torn from the inside out. Kind of like that Alien movie...'
Shivering at the thought, he decided to leave before someone noticed him here with the dead bodies and blamed him for it. So he quickly jumped down and ran into the forest, heading for Suna as it was the only place he knew he'd be welcomed other than Nami.
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Tsunade sighed deeply as she looked at the paperwork in front of her. How she hated this job at times. She had barely slept a hour before Shizune had woken her up. She refrained from sending her apprentice through the wall as she deserved some sleep. I mean she had to heal all day yesterday and forget about her paperwork.
Grumbling as she worked on the papers, she grabbed a weight and flicked it towards the corner of the room, smashing a certain pervert into the wall with it. "What do you want Jiraiya? I'm not in the mood for you peeping habits and will give you a repeat performance of that night fourteen years ago if that's what your doing."
As soon as he pulled himself out of the cratered wall, he paled at the thought of that. That was something he never wanted to experience again. He'd take the Shiki Fuin over that everyday of the week. Regaining his composure, he coughed a bit to get her attention. "I was coming here to let you know that Akatsuki is going to be coming after Naruto in three years."
Tsunade groaned as she heard this. This just wasn't her week. I mean in the span of one week, she becomes Hokage, heal the Sharingan users hit by Tsukiyomi, fix Rock Lee, has to do all this paperwork, send brats on real missions, learns that the last loyal Uchiha abandoned the village, sends a group of gennin and a newly made chunin after him, had to heal them for being nearly killed in the said mission and now finally this. Talk about a stressful week.
"Great... this is just what I need. Now maybe Iwa declare war on us. That should be happening right about now the way things are happening." Jiraiya sweat dropped at her sarcastic statement. And the bad thing was he believed it could be happening with all the shit that was going on right now.
Shaking his head of that, he spoke up. "Anyways, with them coming after Naruto in three years, he will need to be trained to be prepared for them. So I'm going to take him on a training mission around the elemental countries to toughen him up."
Tsunade just glared at him. He wanted to take HER most promising, upcoming shinobi out of the village and train him. Now as good as that would be, it would mean that she would have to find a gennin team to fill up his shoes. The little brat was a team on his own when he was in the trenches. Shaking her head at this, she knew it was needed as the stressful environment at home wouldn't help his training at all.
"How long?"
Jiraiya smiled lightly at her. He knew she would she it his way. As he was about to answer her, Kakashi busted into the room, panting heavily. Tsunade stood straight up as Jiraiya tensed as they looked at him. Seeing the Copy Cat looking this panicked was never a good thing. It either was A, Iwa had declared war on them, or B, something happened with Naruto.
They were so hoping it was A.
Once Kakashi had regained his breath, he confirmed their second thought. "Naruto... Has left... the hospital."
Tsunade cursed a bit hearing this, but she had to wonder why this was such a big deal. "Then why didn't you tell Shizune of this? She could handle it."
His reply was something either wanted to hear. "It's because... I think, Naruto has snapped."
Both Jiraiya and Tsunade's eyes widen before they cursed loudly at the timing. Everything had gone down hill as soon as she arrived at this village. Was her luck really that bad? Shaking that thought off her head, she looked at both Jiraiya and Kakashi. "Jiraiya, go hunt down the brat. Kakashi, get everyone you know that sees him as himself and search the village for him. After that I want you to tell me what happened."
Both nodded and quickly left the room as Tsunade put her fist into the desk, snapping it in half. It didn't matter that her secret sake stash was in the middle of it, she was more worried about Naruto.
After about twenty minutes, Kakashi shushined into the room with a look of panic on his face. "Tsunade-sama! No one can find a trace of him! Not even the Inuzaku's and Aburame's finest trackers! It's like he just disappeared from the face of the Earth!"
Tsunade eyes narrowed at this and spoke up in a calm tone as possible at the moment. "Kakashi. What happened in the hospital?"
Kakashi sighed as he was prepared to take the beating of his life as he began to tell her everything. As he finished, he expected her to be beating the hell out of him, so he had closed his eyes, but she didn't. He opened his eyes to see her thinking about what he said. "Kakashi, I understand your point of view of the situation, but I do think you over reacted a bit and from what you told me of what he said, he has a point as well. After we find him, I will leave up to him to stay on your team or not. But until then, keep searching."
Kakashi nodded numbly expecting this much as Tsunade stood up once more and jumped out of the window going to the only place she could think to start from. His apartment.
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She quickly arrived at the apartment and noticed the door was kicked in. She rushed into the room fearing the worse, thinking that Akatsuki could have came for a second attempt, to find his room was intact and everything seemed to be in place. She narrowed her eyes at this and turned around to see Anko, Ibiki and Tsume run into the room, probably thinking along the same lines as her.
Once they noticed that nothing had happened and trying to figure out why no one else came here to check for him, Tsunade spoke. "Take a look around. There has to be some sort of clue to find him or figure out what's going on with him."
All three nodded as they scanned over the small apartment, looking in his bedroom, kitchen and bathroom seeing that was all he had. Tsunade herself walked over the desk and as she noticed a piece of paper on it. She picked it up and began reading it as it may have some sort of clue as to where he was at.
Crawling in my skin
These wounds will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real
Tsunade's eyes widen as she read the first four lines. They were lyrics to a song that had a bit of a rhyme to it. Yet it felt depressing as she read them. But what confused her was that it was in Naruto's hand writing. Naruto was anything but depressing.
There's something inside me
That pulls beneath the surface
Consuming, Confusing
This lack of self control I fear
Is never ending, controlling
Her eyes began to widen even further as she continued reading this. There was no doubt in her mind that he was talking about Kyuubi in these lines. And this was worrying her. 'But does that mean Kyuubi is influencing him then?!'
I can't seem to find myself again
My walls are closing in
I've felt this way before so insecure
Tsunade was trembling each second as she kept herself from dropping down to her knees and crying. She was sure of it. Naruto was writing these lyrics from his heart. And just like Sakura, it was maddening to see.
Crawling in my skin
These wounds will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real
She was doing all she could not to crumble the paper up in her hands. This just couldn't be Naruto. This couldn't be. This wasn't the happy-go-lucky boy she knew and was beginning to love.
Discomfort, endlessly has pulled
Itself upon me distracting, reacting
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection
It's haunting how I can't seem
I can't seem to find myself again
My walls are closing in
I've felt this way before so insecure
Tsunade bit her lip tightly as she continued reading these painful lyrics as she began to see more and more of the real Naruto. 'Otouto... have you've really been hiding your true self this entire time?'
Crawling in my skin
These wounds will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what it real
'That same line again. I know it's the chorus, but it's something more. It's like he's trying to tell me something, but what?' Tsunade's mind raced as she continued reading, hoping to find a clue.
Crawling in my skin
These wounds will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing, confusing what is real
She continued struggling every second she read the lyrics. She never knew that he had the capability to write like this before, but at the same time she was severely depressed that it was actually his writing.
There's something inside of me
That pulls beneath the surface
Consuming
This lack of self control I fear
Is never ending, controlling
Her eyes widen as she dropped the paper and fell to her knees as tears began to stream from her eyes. She had never once thought Naruto had felt this way. Yet, it made perfect sense. He was a jinchuuriki after all. The others rushed over to her to find out what was wrong and noticed the paper. One by one, they each read it and had similar reactions as their eyes widen. Only Anko's was different as she ran out of the room as the lyrics remind her of her own life.
Calming herself down, Tsunade pulled herself off the ground and turned to the two that were still inside the apartment. "What did you find?"
Ibiki sighed lightly as he spoke out. "Apart from the basic essentials, and ramen, nothing else is gone. It seems he left the village on his own free will. Which means if he doesn't show up in the next couple of days, he will have to be mark a nukenin."
Tsunade nodded numbly at the fact as she didn't want to, but it was protocol, and she couldn't break that even for him.
Tsume took a deep breath before speaking up. "Tsunade-sama don't worry. I'll convince the other clan heads to label him as a C-rank nukenin and to be brought back on sight. I'm sure the elders will agree with us as well as they never seen him in a bad light. The civilian members on the council will try to mark him as a S-rank, but they have no authority here."
Tsunade nodded again at that, glad that the civilians had no control over this subject, but still was saddened immensely that it was resorting to this and the lyrics on the sheet of paper. Tsume nodded and headed out with Ibiki to give the Hokage some time to herself.
She needed it right now.
We Do Not Own Naruto or the Copy Rights to Linkin Park and their songs. This is pure fiction, so please do not sue.
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It was early mourning in the hospital. It was peaceful in the large building, mainly because everyone was asleep as the Sasuke retrieval team were now officially out of the critical zone. Each one had a difficult fight that they nearly lost and died in the process.
Shikamaru was the least injured of the group as he only had a broken thumb, but if Temari had not had shown up, he would have had his throat slit. The one in the next best condition was Lee. He wasn't originally part of the group, but he had came in time as Naruto was about to fight Kimimaro. In the end he was saved by Gaara.
Kiba was the middle man of the group. He had a few self inflicted wound as if he had tried to commit suppuku to get the weird brother Ukon out of his skin. If Kankuro didn't show up at the last seconds, he himself would have died.
Neji was in critical condition when he arrived in the hospital. He had two large holes through his chest and stomach after his fight with Kidomaru. In the end, his suicidal strategy had paid off as he delivered a jyuken strike to his head, ending the spider like man's life.
Chouji was in the worst condition of the five. He had taken the three experimental Akimichi pills to defeat his opponent. He did so as the pill increase his reserves beyond anything ever seen before, even opening the eight gate. But the price for this was the toxicity of the final pill would kill him. If he had not coughed up a chunk of it, he wouldn't have survived.
Everyone was glad the four of them pulled through, but everyone except for a few really cared about the last one that was lying in a room of his own, looking out at the rising sun. His blonde hair shined brightly as the sun hit it as his electric blue eyes gazed at it as he couldn't get any sleep. The reason being his fight with the teen he considered his brother.
The truth was, he was in worse shape than the others, maybe other than Chouji. When he had arrived on Kakashi's back, he had severe lacerations covering his body, a few puncture wounds, mass chakra depletion and one wound that was healed on the outside, but the inside was still injured. The final strike of Sasuke's that nicked his heart.
On the way back, he kept fading in and out as he kept seeing images of his life. These images haunted him so. They ranged from his beatings to his few happier moments with the Sandaime, Iruka or old man Ichiraku. Remembering everything that he lived through his life, a tear drop slowly slid down his cheek. He wanted to blame the fox, but for some reason, he knew it wasn't completely at fault.
He sighed a bit more as he rubbed his heart, still feeling the phantom pain from where Sasuke's hand had nicked his heart. He through the window and noticed the people beginning to walk through the streets down below. His face became crestfallen as he looked at them, as they were the same people that had been pushing him away all his life.
As he continued looking out the window, one of the songs he had been writing when he couldn't get some sleep seeped into his mind and heart. His eyes water a bit before wiping them away before he began to sing, not knowing his teammate was at his door and about to knock.
I've lied to you
The same way that I always do
This is the last smile
That I'll fake for the sake of being with you.
From outside, Sakura was about to knock when she heard the singing from the other side of the door. At first she was surprised at this, but remembering an event not to long ago, she decided to wait to knock and pressed her ear to the door to listen more to Naruto's startling voice.
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
The sacrifice is never knowing
Sakura was stunned at the clarity of his voice as she really never did suspect Naruto to be a good singer. But this was better than she ever dreamt of. Hell, she doubted that some of the bands she listen to sounded this good.
Why I never walked away?
Why I played myself this way?
Now I see, you testing me, pushes me away.
Sakura felt a pang of guilt enter her heart as she heard him sing this and repeat the last three lines. 'Is this how he truly feels? What made you this way Naruto?'
I've tried like you
To do everything you wanted too
This is the last time
I'll take the blame for the sake of being with you
Sakura now felt even worse than before. She had already know that Naruto hadn't managed to bring Sasuke back as that was the first place she tried to get out of the nurse. When she found out that he hadn't brought him back, she was mad at first, but then realized that she wasn't able to keep him here either and that Naruto had given everything he had to bring him back.
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
The sacrifice is never knowing
Why I never walked away?
Why I played myself this way?
Now I see, you testing me, pushes me away.
Why I never walked away?
Why I played myself this way?
Now I see, your testing me, pushes me away.
At this, Sakura cringed even more as she slowly began to walk away from the door. She didn't know why, but she could feel this was coming from Naruto's heart. And that was disturbing her.
He was always the happy-go-lucky, wannabe Hokage that brighten everyone's day, even if they didn't know it. And to see him like this, was nearly maddening for her. She could no longer take it as he began to repeat the chorus and ran off crying, passing by a shocked Kakashi.
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
The sacrifice is never knowing
Why I never walked away?
Why I played myself this way?
Now I see, you testing me, pushes me away.
Why I never walked away?
Why I played myself this way?
Now I see, your testing me, pushes me away.
Naruto finished singing as another tear drop fell from his eye and wiped it off quickly as he heard someone knock on the door. Once he was sure he was ready, he would have told them to come in, but they had already invited them self in. He refrain from growling at the cycloptic jounin as he had no sense of respect if he didn't at least wait till the person called him in.
Kakashi on the other was more worried about his other student at the moment than that. He hadn't liked the fact that Sakura passed him and was crying her heart out as if something precious from her was taken away. He wasn't sure what happened, but he was going to get it from the source as she came from Naruto's room.
"Naruto. What just happened here? I saw Sakura running away as if she was just told Sasuke had died in the mission."
Naruto's eyes widened hearing this. 'Sakura-chan was here? Why didn't she enter?... Wait... She didn't hear me sing did she?!'
Seeing the look on his student's face was helping. It seemed he had either no clue, or was trying to look clueless. It was hard to tell with him at times. He would have to guess the last one as a look of realization began to hit him. He wasn't exactly pleased at this, seeing as one of his student's was gone and the other was currently crying. He wasn't pinning the blame on Naruto for Sasuke leaving, but he had something to do with Sakura's condition.
"Naruto. What did you say to her?"
The blonde haired jinchuuriki looked up at him in confusion as he hadn't said a single thing to Sakura. Hell, he didn't even know that she was at the door listening to him. "Kakashi-sensei, I have no clue what your talking about. I haven't even seen Sakura-chan today, otherwise I would have a lump on my head."
Kakashi refrained from sweat dropping at that. It was unfortunately true that she did hit him everyday, but he still didn't believe him hundred percent. He was sure Naruto had to have done something with Sakura, but now he was beginning to wonder what happened. "Okay, then what happened to her to make her cry like that Naruto?"
Naruto was becoming tired of Kakashi's questions and he didn't want to tell him that she most have caught him singing the song from his heart. Growling a bit, Naruto responded to his question. "How should I know? In fact, why should I care?! Our normally greeting is me getting to taste concrete as she pounds my head into the ground!"
The cycloptic jounin flinched at Naruto's tone and truth to the statement, but he could feel something was bothering his student and now he wanted to know what. And seeing Naruto was going to tell him, he wasn't going to press the issue any further as he seemed to be in a bad mood. "Naruto, be that as it may, I want you to apologize to Sakura."
"Apologize?! Apologize for what?! I didn't do anything! So why do I have to apologize for something I didn't do?!" Naruto growled louder at his sensei, nearing the volume of a yell.
Kakashi was startled by this. Naruto was not one to get angered easily. He was beginning to think that using that much of Kyuubi's chakra had it's side effects as he answered in a calm tone. "Naruto. I'm not telling you to, I'm ordering you to. Otherwise I'll kick you off the team if you keep acting like this."
Naruto growled even louder at the jounin in front of him. He had to catch him at the worst time possible as his patience was already extremely thin with what had happened over the past couple of days. "Team? What team! There has never been a team! It has always been Sasuke this, Sakura that. What about me?! You have done nothing other than teach me tree walking and then pushed me an incompetent teacher! I was lucky that I ran into Ero-sennin otherwise I would have been creamed, possibly killed by Neji!"
Kakashi knew something was wrong now as his heart felt a pang of guilt from this. He knew it to be true and felt horrible for it. But he had plans to train Naruto after the Chunin Exams to make up for it, but with the Oto/Suna invasion, he had to put them on hold as they had to rebuild and be called on higher missions than they should take. He was about to answer him, but apparently Naruto wasn't finished yet.
"And then, after I get back from rescuing Baa-chan and get dragged into a fight with Sasuke, you had the audacity to question Ero-sennin for teaching me the Rasengan, which I might add if I didn't learn, both Baa-chan and I would be dead! You completely neglected that Sasuke used Chidori as I built an incomplete Rasengan!"
Kakashi's face had gone pale at these revelations and had lost his answer as Naruto continued on with his rant.
"Oh, did I mention I was hit by that jutsu once when I was fighting him in the Valley of the End! And then when you showed up, you checked up on me and then looked to Pakkun, who I quote, said that he couldn't follow the scent any longer! You never were worried for me! You were worried about your prized student! The only reason why you brought me back was because you couldn't follow Sasuke any longer! But guess what, if I hadn't been brought in when I was, I would have been dead! All you have to do is look at those charts and it tells you!"
If he wasn't pale before, Kakashi was now as he looked like Orochimaru with silver hair and in a mask. He hadn't believed Naruto to have been conscious then. But the information that he would have died he found startling. He had saw no life threatening wound on the jinchuuriki, so he didn't think he was that bad of a condition. Did he miss something?
"Naruto... I'm..."
"Your what?! Sorry! It's too late for that Kakashi-sensei! I quit this team." Naruto quickly stood up from the bed and grabbed his clothes faster than Kakashi could react due to his overstrained mind and jumped out of the window.
His eyes widened as he rushed to the window entrance and looked around for him, only to see he was nowhere in sight. He cursed slightly as he turned around and was about to run out when he decided to look at the reports. His eyes widen as he quickly read through them and cursed himself out loud. He was telling the truth.
Dropping them, he quickly ran out the building with speeds showing why he was an Anbu captain, heading for the Hokage's Tower. He was going to need some help and a miracle to find and convince Naruto to stay on his team now, and another to keep from Tsunade from turning him into a meat pancake.
-----------------
Naruto busted his door down, not caring at the moment as he headed to the bathroom and took a quick whiz and changed his clothes before walking back out. He looked around his room and found his pack and grabbed it. He didn't care that they would mark him a nukenin. He was leaving this village. It had pushed him too far and he knew he didn't belong here.
He thought for a few moments on staying for the sake of Tsunade, Jiraiya, Sarutobi, Teuchi, Ayame and Iruka. He knew each would miss him greatly and the same would go for him. But, they would understand why he left. Each of them knew what life he lived here and wouldn't hold it against them. Sure they would try to bring him back, but that's what true friends and family did. So he decided leaving was the best course of action.
After he decided this, he went around the room for stuff he wanted to keep with him. Of course he had to have his ramen and kettle as he couldn't live without the said food, but what next. That was quickly answered as he grabbed a few scrolls that he had copied from Ero-sennin's real notes, not the perverted ones he always writes.
Once he made sure he had them, he went through his ninja supplies and took what he needed in his pouches and put a few in his pack for spares. Other than that, he really couldn't find anything else that he wanted to keep with him other than a few set of clothes, which always keep in his pack anyways.
Shrugging his shoulders, he was about to jump through the window when he noticed the papers on his desk. Taking a quick look at them, he noticed it was the songs that he would write when he couldn't fall asleep or would wake up in the middle of the night. Looking over them, he noticed that they where how he really felt about the village and his life.
He closed his eyes and held them closely to them before packing them carefully as he didn't want to leave them, or have anyone finding them. He quickly zipped up his pack and jumped out of the window as he headed for the north wall as it was the least guarded.
Luckily for him, no one noticed him as he headed in that direction, probably since they were all grieving over the lose of the last loyal Uchiha. The thought burned deeply into his mind. They really didn't care for him, but more for his bloodline. If Sasuke wasn't an Uchiha, no one would have ever cared. Maybe that's why he left. He didn't want to be sought after as I tool, but for himself.
Shaking that thought off, he reached the north wall and noticed something. No one was there. This was puzzling him. Why was no one here? It made no sense. Deciding to take a look around, he jumped on the wall and noticed why no one was here.
It was because they were all dead.
'It looks like they were hit with that spider web the spider guy used and finished off by being crushed, stabbed or... I don't even know what the hell happened to him. Looks like he was torn from the inside out. Kind of like that Alien movie...'
Shivering at the thought, he decided to leave before someone noticed him here with the dead bodies and blamed him for it. So he quickly jumped down and ran into the forest, heading for Suna as it was the only place he knew he'd be welcomed other than Nami.
-----------------
Tsunade sighed deeply as she looked at the paperwork in front of her. How she hated this job at times. She had barely slept a hour before Shizune had woken her up. She refrained from sending her apprentice through the wall as she deserved some sleep. I mean she had to heal all day yesterday and forget about her paperwork.
Grumbling as she worked on the papers, she grabbed a weight and flicked it towards the corner of the room, smashing a certain pervert into the wall with it. "What do you want Jiraiya? I'm not in the mood for you peeping habits and will give you a repeat performance of that night fourteen years ago if that's what your doing."
As soon as he pulled himself out of the cratered wall, he paled at the thought of that. That was something he never wanted to experience again. He'd take the Shiki Fuin over that everyday of the week. Regaining his composure, he coughed a bit to get her attention. "I was coming here to let you know that Akatsuki is going to be coming after Naruto in three years."
Tsunade groaned as she heard this. This just wasn't her week. I mean in the span of one week, she becomes Hokage, heal the Sharingan users hit by Tsukiyomi, fix Rock Lee, has to do all this paperwork, send brats on real missions, learns that the last loyal Uchiha abandoned the village, sends a group of gennin and a newly made chunin after him, had to heal them for being nearly killed in the said mission and now finally this. Talk about a stressful week.
"Great... this is just what I need. Now maybe Iwa declare war on us. That should be happening right about now the way things are happening." Jiraiya sweat dropped at her sarcastic statement. And the bad thing was he believed it could be happening with all the shit that was going on right now.
Shaking his head of that, he spoke up. "Anyways, with them coming after Naruto in three years, he will need to be trained to be prepared for them. So I'm going to take him on a training mission around the elemental countries to toughen him up."
Tsunade just glared at him. He wanted to take HER most promising, upcoming shinobi out of the village and train him. Now as good as that would be, it would mean that she would have to find a gennin team to fill up his shoes. The little brat was a team on his own when he was in the trenches. Shaking her head at this, she knew it was needed as the stressful environment at home wouldn't help his training at all.
"How long?"
Jiraiya smiled lightly at her. He knew she would she it his way. As he was about to answer her, Kakashi busted into the room, panting heavily. Tsunade stood straight up as Jiraiya tensed as they looked at him. Seeing the Copy Cat looking this panicked was never a good thing. It either was A, Iwa had declared war on them, or B, something happened with Naruto.
They were so hoping it was A.
Once Kakashi had regained his breath, he confirmed their second thought. "Naruto... Has left... the hospital."
Tsunade cursed a bit hearing this, but she had to wonder why this was such a big deal. "Then why didn't you tell Shizune of this? She could handle it."
His reply was something either wanted to hear. "It's because... I think, Naruto has snapped."
Both Jiraiya and Tsunade's eyes widen before they cursed loudly at the timing. Everything had gone down hill as soon as she arrived at this village. Was her luck really that bad? Shaking that thought off her head, she looked at both Jiraiya and Kakashi. "Jiraiya, go hunt down the brat. Kakashi, get everyone you know that sees him as himself and search the village for him. After that I want you to tell me what happened."
Both nodded and quickly left the room as Tsunade put her fist into the desk, snapping it in half. It didn't matter that her secret sake stash was in the middle of it, she was more worried about Naruto.
After about twenty minutes, Kakashi shushined into the room with a look of panic on his face. "Tsunade-sama! No one can find a trace of him! Not even the Inuzaku's and Aburame's finest trackers! It's like he just disappeared from the face of the Earth!"
Tsunade eyes narrowed at this and spoke up in a calm tone as possible at the moment. "Kakashi. What happened in the hospital?"
Kakashi sighed as he was prepared to take the beating of his life as he began to tell her everything. As he finished, he expected her to be beating the hell out of him, so he had closed his eyes, but she didn't. He opened his eyes to see her thinking about what he said. "Kakashi, I understand your point of view of the situation, but I do think you over reacted a bit and from what you told me of what he said, he has a point as well. After we find him, I will leave up to him to stay on your team or not. But until then, keep searching."
Kakashi nodded numbly expecting this much as Tsunade stood up once more and jumped out of the window going to the only place she could think to start from. His apartment.
-----------------
She quickly arrived at the apartment and noticed the door was kicked in. She rushed into the room fearing the worse, thinking that Akatsuki could have came for a second attempt, to find his room was intact and everything seemed to be in place. She narrowed her eyes at this and turned around to see Anko, Ibiki and Tsume run into the room, probably thinking along the same lines as her.
Once they noticed that nothing had happened and trying to figure out why no one else came here to check for him, Tsunade spoke. "Take a look around. There has to be some sort of clue to find him or figure out what's going on with him."
All three nodded as they scanned over the small apartment, looking in his bedroom, kitchen and bathroom seeing that was all he had. Tsunade herself walked over the desk and as she noticed a piece of paper on it. She picked it up and began reading it as it may have some sort of clue as to where he was at.
Crawling in my skin
These wounds will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real
Tsunade's eyes widen as she read the first four lines. They were lyrics to a song that had a bit of a rhyme to it. Yet it felt depressing as she read them. But what confused her was that it was in Naruto's hand writing. Naruto was anything but depressing.
There's something inside me
That pulls beneath the surface
Consuming, Confusing
This lack of self control I fear
Is never ending, controlling
Her eyes began to widen even further as she continued reading this. There was no doubt in her mind that he was talking about Kyuubi in these lines. And this was worrying her. 'But does that mean Kyuubi is influencing him then?!'
I can't seem to find myself again
My walls are closing in
I've felt this way before so insecure
Tsunade was trembling each second as she kept herself from dropping down to her knees and crying. She was sure of it. Naruto was writing these lyrics from his heart. And just like Sakura, it was maddening to see.
Crawling in my skin
These wounds will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real
She was doing all she could not to crumble the paper up in her hands. This just couldn't be Naruto. This couldn't be. This wasn't the happy-go-lucky boy she knew and was beginning to love.
Discomfort, endlessly has pulled
Itself upon me distracting, reacting
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection
It's haunting how I can't seem
I can't seem to find myself again
My walls are closing in
I've felt this way before so insecure
Tsunade bit her lip tightly as she continued reading these painful lyrics as she began to see more and more of the real Naruto. 'Otouto... have you've really been hiding your true self this entire time?'
Crawling in my skin
These wounds will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what it real
'That same line again. I know it's the chorus, but it's something more. It's like he's trying to tell me something, but what?' Tsunade's mind raced as she continued reading, hoping to find a clue.
Crawling in my skin
These wounds will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing, confusing what is real
She continued struggling every second she read the lyrics. She never knew that he had the capability to write like this before, but at the same time she was severely depressed that it was actually his writing.
There's something inside of me
That pulls beneath the surface
Consuming
This lack of self control I fear
Is never ending, controlling
Her eyes widen as she dropped the paper and fell to her knees as tears began to stream from her eyes. She had never once thought Naruto had felt this way. Yet, it made perfect sense. He was a jinchuuriki after all. The others rushed over to her to find out what was wrong and noticed the paper. One by one, they each read it and had similar reactions as their eyes widen. Only Anko's was different as she ran out of the room as the lyrics remind her of her own life.
Calming herself down, Tsunade pulled herself off the ground and turned to the two that were still inside the apartment. "What did you find?"
Ibiki sighed lightly as he spoke out. "Apart from the basic essentials, and ramen, nothing else is gone. It seems he left the village on his own free will. Which means if he doesn't show up in the next couple of days, he will have to be mark a nukenin."
Tsunade nodded numbly at the fact as she didn't want to, but it was protocol, and she couldn't break that even for him.
Tsume took a deep breath before speaking up. "Tsunade-sama don't worry. I'll convince the other clan heads to label him as a C-rank nukenin and to be brought back on sight. I'm sure the elders will agree with us as well as they never seen him in a bad light. The civilian members on the council will try to mark him as a S-rank, but they have no authority here."
Tsunade nodded again at that, glad that the civilians had no control over this subject, but still was saddened immensely that it was resorting to this and the lyrics on the sheet of paper. Tsume nodded and headed out with Ibiki to give the Hokage some time to herself.
She needed it right now.