Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Naruto: Uncut & Uncensored ❯ Hide and Seek: Extreme ( Chapter 11 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

By: nazi012

A/n: Hello everybody! Naz was really mad that Tsubasa is with Sasuke, but Naz got over it quick and now she and kiba are all lovey dovey!!!!!!! Believe me: this chapter is the start of the weirdness that will never leave! It stays throughout the chapters!

Things to be aware of in this chapter:

Sacrifice

British accents

Private Jets

~~***~~~

Chapter 11- Hide and Seek: Extreme

Meeting Room

Nazuna, Tsubasa, Ino, Sakura, Tenten, Kiba, Sasuke, Neji and Shikamaru sit at the table discussing the rules to the game.

Nazuna- Okay, the rules are, you can hide anywhere throughout the world, all seven continents, all seven seas, the Grand Canyon, and there's no base! Alright who wants to be it?

Nobody said anything

Nazuna- Fine we'll do this the ghetto way. Everyone put you're gosh darn foot in.

Everyone did as they were told.

Nazuna- Okay. Bubblegum, bubblegum in a dish. How many pieces do you wish?

Her finger landed on Shikamaru's foot.

Shikamaru- uh…three.

Nazuna- Okay. 1, 2, 3 and you are not it for the rest of this game in 2006 for the rest of the time that sakura's hair is pink and the rest of the time that really, really hot.

Her hand then landed on Tenten.

Nazuna- Okay Tenten. You can take your foot out. You're not it. Okay whose it next? Bubblegum, bubblegum in a dish. How many pieces do you wish?

Nazuna's finger landed on her foot.

Nazuna- Well I wish for seven pieces, since that's my lucky number. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 and you are not it for the rest of this game in 2006 for the rest of the time that sakura's hair is pink and the rest of the time that I'm really, really hot.

Her finger landed on Neji.

Nazuna- Okay, Neji. You're not it. Bubblegum, bubblegum in a dish. How many pieces do you wish?

Her finger landed on Sakura.

Sakura- Hmm…let's see…how about twelve?

Nazuna- Fine. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12 and you are not it for the rest of this game in 2006 for the rest of the time that sakura's hair is pink and the rest of the time that I'm really, really hot…okay. I'm getting tired. Let's do this the other ghetto way. 1, 2, 3 not it!

Outside the Studio

Ino had been it.

Ino- Okay, I'm gonna count to one billion, got it?

Tenten- got it.

Nazuna- Crystal clear!

Ino- *covering her eyes* Okay. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6…

Everyone runs off

Great Wall of China

Sasuke *sitting on top* Ha! She'll never think to look here!

Sasuke picked up his phone and called Neji.

Sasuke- Hey Neji… I'm at the Great Wall. Where you at?

Mediterranean Sea

Neji *in canoe* yo I'm in the Mediterranean Sea in a canoe!

Neji then noticed a shark fins sticking out of the water and swimming near him.

Neji- Uh…Sasuke…I'ma hit you back…I'm in a bit of a pickle…

Neji hung up the phone as the shark swam towards him.

Neji- *screaming* AHHH!!!!! HELP ME!!!!!!!!! I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!

The shark leapt up but then Neji realized it was Ino with a fin on top of her head. She quickly tagged the frightened boy.

Ino- Gotcha, Neji! Now help me find the others!

London, England

Nazuna- C'mon Tenten! We gotta hurry before Ino finds us!

Tenten- Here's an idea! Let's get some contacts and some wigs and some new clothes!

Nazuna- Why contacts?

Tenten- They can change you're eye color.

Nazuna- Oh.

Tenten and Nazuna skipped through the streets of London and then found a wig ship.

Inside The Shop

Tenten *picking up a red “Marylyn Monroe” wig* How about this, Naz?

Nazuna *shaking her head* It'll be way obvious. I need like some short brown hair.

Tenten- Yeah! And I'll have some medium black hair.

Nazuna- Cute.

Tenten tried on a mid-back length black wig.

Tenten- how do you like this?

Nazuna- that's hot. She'll never recognize us! Now to try on my wig.

Nazuna put on a shoulder length dirty blonde wig.

Tenten- c'mon Naz, you're hair is already blonde.

Nazuna- no, my hair was naturally brown, and my hair isn't blonde, it's bleached.

Tenten- I heard that makes you're hair fall out.

Nazuna- OH MY FRIGGIN GOD!!!!

Honolulu, Hawaii

Shikamaru is digging a hole.

Shikamaru- tehehe… she'll never think to look in a pineapple patch! I'll just spray paint my face orange, temporarily dye my hair green, close my eyes and sit in this hole, and she'll just think I'm a pineapple! Ha, it's a perfect plan!

Shikamaru then pulled a bottle of orange spray out of his pocket.

Shikamaru- please Kami, let this work…

Shikamaru sprayed his face orange.

Shikamaru *thinking to himself* this is probably the DUMBEST thing I will EVER do.

Then he poured green hair dye in his hair, and it instantly sat in.

Shikamaru *taking a deep breath* okay, here I go.

Then Shikamaru got into the hole.

Two Hours Later…

Shikamaru- *thinking to himself* she still hasn't found me?

Of course his eyes were closed, so he didn't know if the voices he was about to hear was Ino or not.

Shikamaru *hearing the voice, and thinking to himself* Oh crap, that's Ino! Please don't find me, please don't find me…

Local Hawaiian Girl- *talking on the phone* Yes Tito…yes, I'm gathering the pineapples…okay; I'll see you at the festival…bye.

The girl started to gather pineapples near Shikamaru.

Shikamaru *thinking to himself* oh my Kami…she's gonna pick me….wait a sec! She's not dumb enough to think I'm actually a pineapple! Hehe, I have nothing to stress over.

Then the girl tugged on Shikamaru's hair.

Local Hawaiian Girl- hmm…the legend says: any pineapple that is hard to pick out of the ground shall be the first sacrifice!

Shikamaru *thinking to himself* s-sacrifice? Holy crap, I gotta get outa here!

Shikamaru opened his eyes.

Shikamaru- uh…little girl, I'm not a pineapple.

The girl gasped.

Local Hawaiian Girl- I cannot believe it! It is Pineapplus, the great Pineapple god! Oh my, your highness, I am highly grateful you chose me to witness your power!

Shikamaru- Pineapple-what? My name is Shikamaru Nara.

Local Hawaiian Girl- Tehe, don't be silly, your highness. Your name is obviously Pineapplus, and my name is obviously Koanna. Now, please, let me take you to our island's yearly Pineapple Sacrifice. I want to show the others that I am worthy to be in this island's festival!

Shikamaru- Uh…again, I ain't no Pineapple God. My name is friggin Shikamaru Nara…

Koanna- Ugh! Just c'mon!

Koanna grabbed Shikamaru's wrist and pulled him out of the hole.

Shikamaru- Uh…little girl…

Back At the Studio

Tsubasa and Sakura are sitting in the living room watching MTV Cribs.

Sakura- we are so smart.

Tsubasa- I know, right. I mean, who would think to look back in Tokyo?

Sakura & Tsubasa- nobody!

Sakura- you know what? I'm gonna go to Taco Bell…you want anything?

Tsubasa- yeah! Get me a chicken border-bowl and a Pepsi.

Sakura- Alright.

Tsubasa handed Sakura ten bucks.

Tsubasa- seeya, and if Ino gets here, I'll tell her you're down under…like Sydney or somewhere.

Sakura *laughing* tehe…thanks.

Sakura walked out of the door and Tsubasa turns off the TV.

Tsubasa- now to listen to my iPod…

Tsubasa took her nano out of her pocket and put the headphones on.

Tsubasa *singing* college park drop dem beats that'll rock the world. We got Bun B and Ying Yang in this thang so get, get, get, get, get it girl.

In Sakura's Car

Sakura- *singing to her iPod, which was hooked up to her car speakers* Get it, get it, get it girl. Get it, get it, get it girl. Get it, get it, get it girl. Get it, get it, get it girl. Get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get it girl.

Sakura then pulled up into the Taco Bell drive thru.

Taco Bell Person- Welcome to taco bell, may I take your order?

Sakura *turning the volume down* yeah…I'll have a zesty chicken border bowl, a Pepsi with that, and a bean burrito.

Taco Bell Person- that'll be 8.75.

Sakura- Okay…

Sakura then drove up to the next window.

Las Vegas, Nevada: Casino

Kiba is playing a slot machine

Kiba- c'mon, Nazi needs a new pair of shoes!

Cherry, cherry, cherry.

Kiba- whoopee!!! Nazuna will be proud of me tonight!

A whole rack of coins spilled out of the machine.

Machine- jackpot, jackpot.

Kiba- go me, its Naz's birthday, go me, its Naz's birthday.

Then Kiba's cell phone rang

Kiba's cell phone- let me see you bounce right to left and let your shoulder lean, and let your shoulder lean, just let your shoulder lean…

Kiba- hey babe.

Nazuna- how'd you know it was me?

Kiba- your ring tone is shoulder lean.

Nazuna- aw, you know that's my song. Yours is “Chelsea”.

Kiba- Chelsea?

Nazuna- yeah, *singing* I don't wanna lose my head today and I know there's something in your way. Maybe I made a big mistake last night when I left you alone…with Chelsea.

Kiba- oh…that song.

Nazuna- yeah. Soooo what'cha doing?

Kiba- I'm bout to go buy you a new pair of shoes.

Nazuna- really?! Oh thanks so much, love! Where are you?

Kiba- Vegas. You?

Nazuna- me and Mrs. Neji are in England.

Kiba- oh…

Neji called Kiba on his other line.

Kiba- uh, Naz?

Nazuna- Yuh-huh?

Kiba- I'll call you back, Hyuga's on my other line.

Nazuna- okay…bye, honey. I love you.

Kiba blushed slightly.

Kiba- I love you too.

Nazuna hung up and Kiba answered Neji's line.

Kiba- yo.

Neji- yo. Sooo…where you at?

Kiba- why? Where you at?

Neji- I'm in the Mediterranean Sea.

Kiba- uh-huh. I'm in Nevada, buying my baby some new shoes.

Neji- jackpot, huh?

Kiba- Yezerd.

Neji- hmm…so, where is your baby, and Tenten, cuz I know she's with her. There just about always together.

Kiba- they're somewhere in England. I'm guessing they're in the world's fashion capitol.

Neji- London?

Kiba- London.

Neji- Naruto could've got that one.

Kiba- I know.

Neji- well…I'm gonna go before Ino traces my phone and finds out where I am.

Kiba- Aight.

Both hung up.

In Ino's Black Viper

Ino and Neji smirk and slap eachother a high-five.

Ino- we so rule.

Neji- you got that right. So where to first, Britain or the US?

Ino- hmm…good question, Nej.

Author- yes…Ino called Neji “Nej”. That's his nickname.

Neji- uh…how about the US?

Ino- Okay, but you know what that means…ROAD…trip…? Uh, Neji, you were supposed to say it with me.

Neji- yeah…I don't do that.

Ino- aw…you suck.

Neji turned on the radio.

Neji- shut up, Ino.

Honolulu, Hawaii

Koanna is dragging Shikamaru up to a festival.

Shikamaru- okay, Koanna, I'm NOT a pineapple, or a pineapple god.

Koanna- don't be silly, Pineapplus. You're gonna be sacrificed, and that's final. We're lifting you up to the heavens.

Shikamaru- oh c'mon! I NEED to end this.

Shikamaru pulled out his cell and dialed Ino's number.

Ino- what up, baby?

Shikamaru- PLEASE come and find me, Ino-kun. PLEASE!

Ino- why? I'm on the verge of finding Kiba, and then we're jetting over to London to get the implant sisters.

Shikamaru- damn, you're right…they're Tenten and Naz's boobs are ginormous…but that's not the point! You need to get me outa here baby!

Ino- UGH! Fine. Where are you?

Shikamaru- Honolulu.

Ino- Alright, me and Nej will be over as soon as we can. Bye love.

Shikamaru- bye.

Koanna- oh…I guess you aren't Pineapplus…

Las Vegas

Neji and Ino are looking for Kiba.

Neji- KIIIIIIIIBBBBBAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

Ino- come out, come out wherever you are!

Kiba then emerged from behind a slot machine.

Kiba- aw, Nej! You used me!

Ino & Neji- you got that right loser.

Ino shuffled over to Kiba and tagged him.

Ino- Okey dokey, you're tagged. And now, since Shikamaru is like BEGGIN' me to come and get him, we gotta jet over there, and then we'll get him and jet over to London.

Kiba- sounds good to me.

Neji- okay, let's go.

London, England

Nazuna and Tenten are sitting in a restaurant with there new looks.

Nazuna- okay, we've got our wigs, our big sunglasses, and our contacts, now we've gotta get names.

Tenten- Hmm…

Nazuna- Hmm is right…I think I'll go with Torrie. Torrie Madison.

Tenten- that sounds super kawaii. I think I'll go with Kristina and I'll be your sister.

Nazuna- okay, so we're now Kristina and Torrie Madison.

Tenten- okay Torrie.

Nazuna- Okay Kristina.

They both laughed.

Nazuna- Alright, now with the accents…it's a good thing I was an understudy on The Goblet of Fire.

Tenten- well I've just naturally had a gift with the British accent.

Nazuna *in British accent* okay Kris, today will be fun.

Tenten * in British accent* you said it, Torrie.

In Naruto Cast's Private Jet

Neji *sitting on the couch* I love having a private jet.

Kiba *making martinis at the bar* anyone want a martini?

Ino and Neji- count me in, dude!

Kiba *laughing* Alrighty then!

Then the jet landed in Honolulu, Hawaii

Ino- aw man, looks like we gotta do that later. Now it's time to pick up Shikamaru.

Kiba & Neji-*sounding all winy* Ooookaaaaaay…

Back at the Studio

Tsubasa is sitting on the couch and Sakura walks in with their food.

Tsubasa- thanks soooo much Haruno-chan.

Sakura- no prob.

Sakura sat the food on the coffee table in front of the couch and sat down beside Tsubasa.

Sakura *picking at her burrito* soooo…what is up between you and Sasuke?

Tsubasa *looking all sympathetic* ouch…I'm sorry Sakura. I know you like him…

Sakura- no, it's okay. I'm really thinking of quitting this job anyway…

Tsubasa- WHAT?????