Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Naruto vs. Sasuke The Aftermath ❯ Tsunade's Wrath ( Chapter 21 )

Chapter 21 Summary: While Naruto's prank had the desired effect for his friend Rock Lee. It had a completely opposite affect on Tsunade, who was infuriated by the prank. Sending out her Anbu to capture the culprits of this artistic makeover, Tsunade has no idea that her entire morning is about to go to Hell in a Handbasket. And what has Naruto done to Hinata to cause people to shout for his death, or at the very least to experience a lot of pain.

 

 

Naruto vs Sasuke: The Aftermath

 

Chapter 21: “Tsunade's Wrath”

 

"NARUTO!"

 

Meanwhile in Suna, Gaara was sitting at his desk going through the endless paperwork that was the bane of every Kage's existence. When his jinchuuriki enhanced hearing picked up on a faint but recognizable sound of his only friend's name. Gaara smirked slightly, as there was only one person in Konoha with the lung capacity to achieve such a feat. And he silently wondered what Naruto had done now to upset his fellow Kage in Konoha.

 

Back in Konoha, one Hinata Hyuga had already risen from her bed to get ready for the new day. Hinata threw on her robe and walked out onto the balcony of the apartment she shared with Kurenai to gaze upon the village. When she looked upon Hokage Mountain and saw what had been done to Tsunade's monument, she began to giggle, as it was one of the funniest sights she had ever seen. Her amusement quickly vanished when she thought she heard the name of her love carried on the wind. It was then that she realized there was only one person with the audacity to do such a prank. Hurrying back inside, Hinata quickly began to dress, as she needed to get to Hokage Tower as soon as possible. It had taken Hinata practically her whole life to be with Naruto, and she wasn't about to let the Hokage kill him, no matter what he did.

 

Tsunade stormed into her office seething in anger. She hit a button on her desk and 30 seconds later a contingent of four Anbu appeared awaiting her orders. A couple of the Anbu giggled as they looked upon their Hokage before a blast of killing intent froze them in place. Tsunade turned to the lead Captain and said through gritted teeth.

 

"Captain I want you to go to Hokage Mountain and apprehend the artists who decided to give my beautiful face a makeover and bring them before me immediately."

 

"Yes, Hokage-Sama. Do you happen to know who they might be?" The Captain inquires.

 

"I've no doubt that one of them is a orange clad loudmouth brat with little brains and a lot of attitude. As for the second artist, I suspect a perverted one-eye silver haired Cyclops with an equally big mouth and irritating attitude is probably with the other. Do not kill them, but I want them here in front of me now!" Tsunade orders, as she brings her fist down onto her desk breaking it in two and scattering all of the paperwork that sat upon it onto the floor, much to her annoyance.

 

"Y, yes Hokage-Sama." The Anbu Captain nervously stammers before he and his men leaped out of the office. It was shortly after that when Shizune arrived and saw the smashed desk and the look of fury on her mentor's face, before she sighed and says in a soothing voice.

 

"Please calm down Hokage-Sama. You know he didn't do this out of malicious intent. He's just being, well you know, Naruto."

 

Tsunade merely sat in her chair staring out over her demolished desk before a low but audible growl was heard from her at the mention of Naruto's name. She looked over to her longtime friend and assistant who had begun gathering the scattered paperwork from the floor and orders.

 

"Shizune, bring me a bottle of sake and the report on last night's activities in the village. And one more thing, I don't want to hear that gaki's name again until he is here. Do you understand?"

 

"Yes Hokage-Sama, I understand. I'll bring in your breakfast and the report along with another desk right away." Shizune replies in an exasperated tone.

 

A short time later after Tsunade had reviewed the report on the previous night's activities within the village, she ordered Shizune to find and bring Maito Gai from the hospital to her office at once. She then downed another cup of sake and silently wondered why her Anbu squad had not returned with the gaki and his perverted teacher yet? Suddenly she heard a fierce commotion outside of her office. But before she could get up to see what the ruckus was, her Anbu squad along with Kakashi, Naruto and several shadow clones crashed through her door in an all out no holds barred brawl. Which from the appearance of her Anbu, they were losing. Tsunade patience had long since disappeared this morning, bolted up from her chair and in voice filled with anger shouts.

 

“Enough!”

 

The sound of the Hokage's voice and the sheer magnitude of the killing intent coming from Tsunade made all of the combatants stop and move off into separate comers with Kakashi holding back a very agitated Naruto. As Tsunade looked on, she could see one of the Anbu Shinobi had lost his mask and was glaring daggers at Naruto and Kakashi who returned their own glares with equal ferocity. Taking a moment to calm herself, Tsunade asks in a voice tinged with irritation.

 

"What the Hell is going on? I said to bring them here, not have a brawl inside my office with them!"

 

"Forgive us Hokage-Sama, but Hatake Kakashi and the demon child resisted your request for their presence before you and we had to use physical force to make them comply to your wishes." The unmasked Anbu states, as his voice is dripping with venom.

 

"That is a lie." Kakashi says in response.

 

The unmasked Anbu turned towards the silver haired Jounin and looked as though he was about to resume the fight, before his Captain held him back. The Anbu Captain who normally would be the one giving the report to the Hokage, except a roundhouse kick from Naruto on Hokage Mountain had broken his jaw. Struggling to keep his subordinate at bay, he heard the Hokage say with authority.

 

"Silence Kakashi, you'll have your turn to speak after I hear the report from my Anbu."

 

The unmasked Anbu smirked at Kakashi before continuing his report.

 

"If I may continue Hokage-Sama, when we arrived at Hokage Mountain we found Hatake Kakashi and the demon child passed out drunk with several empty bottles of sake strewn about them along with cans of paint and brushes as well. When we attempted to awaken them, the demon child was slow to respond and required some physical incentive from me to get moving. It was at this point that Hatake Kakashi attacked me, and when my fellow Anbu comrades attempted to assist me, the demon child then attacked us all with shadow clones. The result of which was a fight between my squad and them all the way here.”

 

Tsunade walked around her desk and stood before the smirking Anbu before saying in a calm and serene voice.

 

"I think I understand what happened. But tell me again, how did you refer to that orange clad Shinobi over there?"

 

"Demon child." The Anbu answers curiously.

 

"That's what I thought you said." Tsunade sweetly says before rearing back and punching the Anbu through the wall and into the waiting area of her office. Turning back to the now fearful Captain, she orders with righteous fury.

 

"Captain, you and the rest of your squad are dismissed! Go to the hospital and tend to any injuries you might have! But before you go, take that worthless piece of shit laying in my waiting room to Ibiki! Tell him your man needs an education on how to refer to fellow honored Shinobi! He'll know what you're talking about!"

 

The Captain nervously nods, as he and the rest of his squad retrieve their unconscious comrade and quickly exit from the Hokage's presence. Tsunade turning back towards Kakashi and Naruto says to the Copy Ninja.

 

"Alright Kakashi, why don't you tell me what really happened?"

 

"Well, umm, ok. First off Naruto and I weren't passed out, but merely asleep after having an exhaustive battle with Orochimaru and Kabuto after we discovered them vandalizing your beautiful monument. Unfortunately, they had already committed their act of vandalism before we arrived. But we bravely fought them throughout the night to prevent them from committing any more vile acts against your personage. Isn't that right Naruto?"

 

"Yesssss, (hic) Hokage-Sama. That'ssss, exactly (hic) what happened." Naruto slurringly answers, before Kakashi continues on.

 

"As I was saying, after the grueling battle to try and defend your honor. We fell asleep and then later on were awakened by your Anbu squad and we were told to accompany them to your office. As we attempted to comply, one of the Anbu, the Shinobi I believe you just introduced to your fist decided that Naruto wasn't moving fast enough and his form of motivation was to sucker punch Naruto from behind. I took great offense to this and attempted to explain my position to the man when his comrades decided to join in on the discussion I was having with him. This in turn caused Naruto to also join in on the discussion as well. Unfortunately, the debate took longer than we anticipated and we were unable to make our final argument before we arrived at your office. That pretty much sums up everything, can you think of anything else to add Naruto?"

 

"Yeahhhhh, (hic), I like sssssssake. (hic)"

 

"Not helping Naruto." Kakashi states as he pinches the bridge of his nose.

 

Tsunade walks over to the swaying figure of Naruto and cups his cheeks in her hands and looks into his bloodshot eyes before asking with concern.

 

"Have you been drinking Naruto-Kun?"

 

"Heh, heh, just a little (hic) Hokage-SSSSSSSama."

 

'Great, the only time the brat addresses me properly and gives me respect, he's got to be piss drunk to do it.' Tsunade thinks to herself before asking Naruto.

 

"Why have you been drinking?"

 

"Whyyyyyy not Hokage-SSSSSSSSama? Old enough to kill, (hic) old enough to drink, that's what Kakashiiiiii Sensei says." Naruto replies much to Kakashi's discomfort.

 

"Oh you poor boy!" Tsunade exclaims as she envelops Naruto in a motherly hug while glaring and releasing killing intent towards Kakashi. Suddenly a shout rang out from doorway of.

 

"Please Hokage-Sama, don't hurt Naru-Kun!"

 

Tsunade releases her hug and turns around to see Hinata with a fearful look on her face. Standing behind the frightened girl were her teammates Kiba and Shino, whom Hinata had run into on the way to Hokage Tower. Upon reaching the office and seeing all of the destruction, Hinata instantly became worried and when she saw Tsunade hugging Naruto and felt her killing intent, Hinata feared the Hokage was squeezing the life out of him.

 

"I'm not going to hurt Naruto-Kun Hinata, see he's fine." Tsunade says to the distraught young kunoichi.

 

"Yeah, (hic) I'm fine, (hic) nothing to worry about baaaaaaby." Naruto drawls.

 

'Baby? Naru-Kun never calls me baby. Something's not right?' Hinata thinks to herself as she makes her way over to Naruto.

 

Naruto suddenly pulls Hinata into a hug causing the young girl to audibly squeak and then blush a deep shade of crimson in embarrassment of having Naruto show such a display of affection within the office of the Hokage. While hugging Naruto, the smell of sake reaches her nose, and she is about to say something when Naruto beats her to it and says while slurring.

 

"You smell pretty (hic) Hinata-Hiiiiiiiiime."

 

Hearing this caused Kiba to openly snicker before a glare from Hinata shut him up. Turning her attention back to Naruto, Hinata replies to her boyfriend's unusual compliment.

 

"Th, thank you Naru-Kun. But you don't smell pretty, you smell of sake. Have you been drinking Naru-Kun?"

 

"Heh, heh, heh, old enough to kill, old enough to drink. Believe it! (hic)" Naruto announces as he pulls away from Hinata's embrace.

 

"I wish he would stop saying that." Kakashi grumbled in annoyance as he pinched the bridge of his nose once more.

 

Hinata looked at her swaying boyfriend and saw he was about to fall over before she quickly grabbed hold of him once more in a hug and Naruto rested his head on her shoulder. Stroking the back of his head, Hinata shot Tsunade an angry glare before saying in a voice laced with disapproval.

 

"How could you do this to Naruto-Kun, Hokage-Sama?"

 

Tsunade was a bit peeved at Hinata's accusation before she realized that sitting on her desk in clear view of everyone was an open bottle of sake. Tsunade immediately threw her hands in the air and says.

 

"Don't look at me Hinata, I didn't do it. Blame the one-eyed Cyclops he has for a Sensei over there."

 

Hinata turned her hard gaze over towards Kakashi, who sweat dropped, before Hinata asked the boy in her arms.

 

"Is this true Naru-Kun?"

 

The only response to reach Hinata's ears was the sound of light snoring. Hinata let go of Naruto who immediately fell to the ground in a heap, asleep and oblivious to everything around him. "Oh man, he is wasted!" Kiba says with a snicker before another hard glare from Hinata quieted the Inuzuka heir.

 

"Alright, seeing as Naruto is obviously to incapacitated to handle any type of punishment right now. Hinata why don't you take the gaki with you and let him sleep it off. I'll deal with him later." Tsunade says.

 

"Hai, Hokage-Sama. I most humbly apologize for my earlier accusation." Hinata contritely replies while bowing.

 

''Think nothing of it Hinata, I might have jumped to the same conclusion if I were in your shoes." Tsunade says to the young kunoichi with a smile.

 

Hinata then kneels down and attempts to lift Naruto off of the floor but is having difficulty, before Kakashi steps forward and offers his help. Unfortunately, Tsunade was not done with the Copy Ninja yet and sternly says.

 

"You're not going anywhere Kakashi. We still have some things to discuss. Kiba can help Hinata with Naruto."

 

"What, why do I have to help?" Kiba moans with irritation.

 

"Please Kiba-Kun." Hinata pleads looking at her teammate with doe like eyes and a sad expression, which Kiba in all the time he had known her has never been able to resist.

 

"Damn it, give him to me!" Kiba growls, as he hoists Naruto onto his shoulder and he, Hinata, and Shino begin to exit the office before Hinata pauses and walks over to Kakashi. The silver haired Jounin looks at the girl in front of him with curiosity, as he waits for her to say something. Suddenly and without warning he is the recipient of a Jyuukan strike to his stomach knocking the air out of him and causing him to double over. He then hears Hinata angrily shout at him.

 

"That was for getting my Naru-Kun drunk!"

 

Hinata then whirls around and storms out of the office followed by her visibly stunned teammates. As Tsunade watches the young kunoichi leave, her heart is filled with a sense of pride. For Hinata to care so much about her grandson that she willingly attacks a high level Jounin with no hesitation in defense of him is definitely a girl Tsunade could grow to love as her future granddaughter and wife of the gaki. Turning back to Kakashi who was coughing and struggling to regain his breath, she asks with a smirk.

 

"So Kakashi, what do you think of Naruto's girlfriend?"

 

"I think I liked her better when she was bringing me flowers Hokage-Sama." Kakashi haggardly replies while rising to his feet.

 

"Well, I leave that between the two of you. But I think that girl is perfect for Naruto­Kun." Tsunade says with absolute certainty.

 

"I agree completely Hokage-Sama." Kakashi replies without a hint of hesitation.

 

"Now Kakashi as for your fairy tale of Orochimaru and Kabuto defacing my beautiful monument. It might have been more believable if both you and the brat weren't covered in black paint stains. Don't you think?" Tsunade questions.

 

"I suppose, and maybe Orochimaru and Kabuto is a stretch of the imagination. Would you believe it was a group of angry unpaid casino owners who did this?" Kakashi asks.

 

"Enough of your smart-ass comments Kakashi! You may think this is all a joke, but I can assure you I don't. It's bad enough you and Naruto deface my monument for whatever reason. But for you to allow my Naruto-Kun to drink and get drunk, I'm tempted to let Ibiki play with you for a few hours for doing that. You have any other cute remarks you'd like to say before I hand out yours and the brat's punishment?" Tsunade shouts.

 

"Yes Hokage-Sama I do. Naruto had nothing to do with vandalizing your monument. I did that alone and will accept full responsibility for my actions. As for Naruto drinking, I firmly believe if he is old enough to kill. Then he is also old enough to drink. And while it wasn't my intention to get him drunk, I do not regret anything of the previous night. Naruto and I were able to talk about several things, and I feel I can now be a better Sensei and friend to him because of it. So I will accept full responsibility for that as well." Kakashi calmly states.

 

"Be that as it may Kakashi, is it your testimony for the official record that you and you alone vandalized my monument?"

 

"Hai." Kakashi answers.

 

"Very well Kakashi. I don't what could have possessed you and Naruto to do this, or what reason you two may have had for doing it, but I cannot allow it to go unpunished." Tsunade solemnly says.

 

"They did for Lee! And quite possibly for me as well Hokage-Sama." Gai proclaims from the shattered doorway of Tsunade's office.

 

"What do you mean they did it for you and Lee?" Tsunade questions the green clad Jounin as he enters her office.

 

"They did it because Naruto wanted Lee to smile and laugh once more, and Kakashi wanted to help me to repair the bond I had once shared with my student. And their efforts on both counts were a resounding success, even if it did come at the cost of incurring your wrath." Gai acknowledges with gratitude.

 

Tsunade looks over to Kakashi who says nothing but slightly nods his head. Rubbing her forehead, Tsunade slumps into her chair and says with resignation.

 

"Alright, I'm tired of dealing with this at the moment. It's not why I requested your presence here anyway Gai. Let's move onto some other issues, like the reports I received of two highly skilled and very drunk Jounin raising Holy Hell in the village last night. You two wouldn't happen to know who those individuals might be now do you?"

 

Both Gai and Kakashi looked at one another and both of them sweat dropped before Kakashi spoke up and asks.

 

"That depends, do you have eyewitnesses of these Jounin you speak of Hokage-Sama?”

 

"Why yes I do Kakashi. In fact in one particular incident I have several severely crippled Root Anbu who are quite positive to whom the individuals were who injured them. Let's talk about that incident now shall we." Tsunade replies with a smirk, as both the Jounins standing in front of her drop their heads in defeat.

 

About an hour later after hearing the exploits from the night before of her two elite Jounin, Tsunade poured herself another drink and quickly downing it turned her attention back to them and says.

 

"Quite the little adventures you two had last night. I just have a few questions."

 

"I understand the incident at the bar. They insulted me and you took action albeit a drastic one to defend me." Tsunade remarks.

 

"No ma'am." Gai replies.

 

"What do you mean no ma'am?" Tsunade questions.

 

"What I mean Hokage-Sama is the fight did not begin after the Root insulted you. I remembered your orders about Shinobi not causing disturbances in civilian establishments, so I refrained from hitting the man, though it did pain me to do so." Gai states.

 

"So why did you start the fight then?" Tsunade asks.

 

"The Root commander and his men insulted the flames of youth, Hokage-Sama." Gai says with conviction.

 

Tsunade is stunned upon hearing this revelation and it takes her a moment to absorb what she just heard before saying in a monotone voice.

 

"So, let me see if I understand this. The Root commander and his men insulted me and you did nothing, as per my orders. But when they insulted the flames of youth, that is when you hit the man correct."

 

"Uhh, well, it was a matter of honor Hokage-Sama." Gai nervously replied.

 

"A matter of honor, yes I can see that. Now let me explain to you my views of honor." Tsunade sweetly says before slugging the green clad Jounin in front of her into the wail and shouting with vengeance.

 

''The honor of your Hokage should matter more to you than the honor of the flames of youth! And you would be wise to remember that in the future! Do you understand?"

 

"Hai, Hokage-Sama." Gai weakly replies, as he picks himself up off the floor.

 

"Now as for the rest of your juvenile antics from last night, most of it is pretty minor. I will say that TP'ing Danzo's compound was a stroke of genius by you two. I thought Danzo was going to explode, he was so mad when I briefly saw him before you arrived Kakashi. However, Danzo is demanding that the two of you be sent to Ibiki for the altercation you both had with his Root Anbu, but I'm not going to do that. Personally, you two have done me a favor by reducing the number of Root Anbu he has at his disposal. So both of your punishments will be to clean and restore my monument to the way it was before you would be artist got to it. And I want it done by the end of the day." Tsunade sternly orders.

 

"But Hokage-Sama, the message your monument proclaims about the flames of youth is such a positive one. I was hoping we could at least keep it up for a few days." Gai pleads.

 

"He has a point Hokage-Sama. That and the fact it might take a few days to restore the monument. Removing paint is much more difficult than applying paint." Kakashi chimes in.

 

"Well you two baka's don't have a few days. You have until tonight to remove and restore all of it. But perhaps the two of you need some incentive." Tsunade says with a hint of sarcasm before calling for Shizune and asking her to bring in Anko and Yugao from downstairs.

 

Both Gai and Kakashi glanced quickly at one another, as each one sweat dropped before Tsunade says.

 

"Of all the adventures you two had last night, which correspond to the report I read this morning. There is a peeping incident at the Konoha Hot Springs that is in the report yet not mentioned by either one of you, care to explain?"

 

"A peeping incident, I'm shocked Hokage-Sama. My comrade Gai is a well-known and most respected gentleman of the fairer sex. And I merely dabble in reading fine literature on occasion and would never stoop so low as to peek upon ladies at a bathhouse. Frankly Hokage-Sama, I'm saddened that you would think that of Gai or myself." Kakashi replies, it was at that moment Shizune returned with both Anko and Yugao in tow and they entered the office. Gai saw them momentarily and could already feel the blood begin to pool in his sinuses. Immediately closing his eyes he waited for someone to speak when he heard Anko say.

 

"You called for us Lady Tsunade."

 

“Yes Anko, I have a minor mission for the two of you to do. Your fellow Jounin there have been assigned to remove the paint and restore my monument to it's rightful glory, and I need the both of you to watch over them and make sure they complete the task by this evening." Tsunade states.

 

"No offense Lady Tsunade, but that mission sounds pretty lame for kunoichi's of Yugao-­San and my skills to be doing don't you think?" Anko complains with irritation.

 

"Well I thought it might interest the two of you considering those two baka's are the chief suspects of the incident at the hot springs last night. Although Kakashi vehemently denies it." Tsunade answers with a smirk.

 

Both Anko and Yugao narrow their gaze upon Kakashi and Gai who both can feel the killing intent radiating off the two kunoichi's towards them. Taking a moment to collect himself, Kakashi speaks.

 

"I must object Hokage-Sama. Unless you have eyewitnesses that say we are the perpetrators of such a heinous act. I will state once more that both Gai and myself are too much of a gentlemen to ever commit such a deed."

 

"Well, you are correct Kakashi. I don't have any eyewitnesses, as neither Anko nor Yugao were able to get a solid look at the perverts before they escaped. But before I go apologizing for accusing the two of you, why don't we hear what Gai has to say. Gai, open your eyes and please give your statement." Tsunade contritely orders.

 

Gai hesitantly opens his eyes, but one look at Anko and Yugao and his mind immediately recalled how they looked the previous night. Unable to contain it, he rocketed backwards into the wall as blood gushed from his nose like a geyser, confirming for all the ladies present that indeed it had been he and Kakashi at the hot springs last night. Kakashi merely pinched his nose once more in frustration and thought to himself.

 

'Maybe I should have followed my original promise and just killed him when I had the chance?'

 

Meanwhile as Kakashi was currently pondering his fate. A certain red-eyed kunoichi came over a hill and saw her home village in the distance for the first time in days. It had been a relatively easy yet boring delivery mission she had been on, but it did give her time to think. Unfortunately, it had been a wasted effort, as she was just as confused about Kakashi and her feelings as she was before she left. Sighing in frustration, she resumed walking once more towards Konoha, when she spied what had been done to Tsunade's monument on Hokage Mountain. Taking a moment to let the image and message sink in, Kurenai suddenly found herself in a fit of uncontrolled laughter at what she saw. It was a welcomed emotion on her part, as she had not smiled or laughed in several days. As her laughter slowly subsided, she wondered whom would that brave and or stupid as to do something like this. Quickly going through the list of candidates in her mind, there was only one person she knew who fit that category. Smiling as she began walking, Kurenai thought to herself.

 

'I hope Hinata doesn't need a new boyfriend after Tsunade gets done with Naruto.'

 

Back at the Hokage's office, Kakashi was attempting to revive Gai while listening to Anko and Tsunade argue about how much incentive Anko and Yugao would be allowed to use on him and Gai to help complete their punishment. Anko was frustrated because she wanted to use much more deadly force than Tsunade was willing to allow. Finally a compromise was reached and Tsunade announces.

 

"Alright Anko I'll allow you to do that to Kakashi, but not to Gai."

 

"That seems rather unfair Hokage-Sama." Kakashi objects.

 

"Shut it Kakashi! Consider it additional punishment for getting my Naruto-Kun drunk! I can't believe you allowed him to drink, he's just a child!" Tsunade scolds.

 

"Oh get off your high-horse Tsunade and give it a rest. If I remember correctly, you were the same age as Naruto when you first had sake and got drunk. So why don't you cut Kakashi some slack, its not like he forced Naruto to drink." Jiraiya proclaimed as he shimmied into the room seemingly out of thin air.

 

"Jiraiya!" Tsunade exclaimed in a voice filled relief, as she had not heard from him in several days and had been very worried about him because of it. She wanted to throw her arms around her fellow Sannin and hug him, but the duties of Hokage come first and masking her joy at his return says in an irritated voice.

 

"When I want your opinion you old pervert I'll ask you for it. Besides, I don't remember Sarutobi Sensei being a drinking partner of mine. Unlike Kakashi over there was to the knucklehead. Sarutobi Sensei was too noble and decent of a man to ever allow a minor to drink."

 

"Sarutobi Sensei and I drank together when I was Naruto's age. It wasn't often, but we always tipped a few when he would go out with me on my research missions. Sarutobi Sensei was a great man, but you always did put him on a pedestal that he never wanted to be on in the first place Tsunade." Jiraiya states as he walks over to Kakashi.

 

Tsunade was a little unnerved upon learning that her Sensei not only drank with her teammate, but also actively participated with him on his perverted peeping missions. Growling in annoyance she says.

 

"Why are you here Jiraiya? Is it to see me?"

 

"No," the Toad Sannin's coldly replies.

 

Inwardly, Tsunade was hurt by the tone of Jiraiya's voice, when she then heard him say in the same icy tone.

 

"I came here looking for Naruto so we could get some training in like I've promised him the last couple of months. That is the only reason why I am here."

 

"Well as you heard, the gaki is in no shape for anything right now!" Tsunade quietly says.

 

"Bah, he'll be alright after a few hours. We can still get some training in this afternoon. I'm just relieved the brat hasn't been pestering me more about the training." Jiraiya comments.

 

"You probably have Hinata Hyuga to thank for that Master Jiraiya. Naruto's free time is usually occupied with her." Kakashi replies to the Toad Sannin.

 

"Oh yeah, I'd heard he'd gotten himself a girlfriend, and the Hyuga princess no less. Wow, she's a real looker and I'll bet she's a feisty one too when they're alone together. The quiet ones usually are. The brat is just like his father heh, heh." Jiraiya says with a giggle, as he and Kakashi high-five each other in agreement.

 

Suddenly Jiraiya and Kakashi are bombarded with a massive amount of killing intent from the kunoichi's in the room. It was so intense that Gai, who had regained consciousness only moments before, fell to the floor once again, out like a light once more. Jiraiya merely shrugged off the killing intent in annoyance and began speaking to Kakashi once more ignoring Tsunade and the other kunoichi's, which infuriated Tsunade to no end. The Hokage shouts at Jiraiya in a rage.

 

"If you have nothing to report, than get the Hell out of here! I don't have time to deal with an old pervert giggling like a schoolboy!"

 

"Fine Tsunade, you want a report, here it is. After spending nearly a week patrolling the Fire nation and its borders, I could find no trace of your ex-boyfriend or the Uchiha teme anywhere. I then learned yesterday through one of my contacts that the two of them were spotted in Otokagure. Seeing no need to continue a pointless search for them and their forces, I returned to Konoha, the end." Jiraiya says with much irritation.

 

Tsunade visibly flinched at Jiraiya's remark of ex-boyfriend, but decided to let it pass and asks.

 

"Did you find out anything of what Orochimaru might be planning?"

 

"Didn't you listen Tsunade? There is nobody out there for me to learn anything from. What information has the Haruno girl given you?"

 

"H, how do you about her? You've been gone since she returned." Tsunade stammers in surprise.

 

"You seem surprised Tsunade, did you think my spy network only existed outside of Konoha? I know all about the Haruno girl's return as you call it, which reminds me." Jiraiya replies with sarcasm before he slaps the back of Kakashi's head rather soundly and then shouts at the masked Jounin in furious anger.

 

"Baka! Just what the Hell were you thinking risking your life by overdosing on Akimichi Food pills just to save that girl! Do you have any idea how Naruto would have felt if you had died because of that, especially over her? It would have crushed him, as for some reason he still considers you one of his precious people!"

 

Kakashi could only look to the ground and stand silently as he listened to Jiraiya's admonishment of him. Jiraiya saw he would get no argument from Kakashi over this and relented in his verbal barrage of the masked Jounin and says in a more subdued voice.

 

"Alright Kakashi, I won't say anything more about this. Just realize that you are important to Naruto and to others as well. Think before you go throwing your life away to save a worthless lovesick fan girl of a traitor, who would be with that Uchiha bastard right now if the boy had just been a little bit more gentle shall we say with the girl during their reunion."

 

Jiraiya then whirled around and caught Tsunade's fist in the palm of his hand before it struck his head. Looking at her face, he could see she was very upset and also shocked that he had stopped her from striking him. As that was something he had never done before. Tsunade tore her fist away and angrily says.

 

"The girl has a name Jiraiya! And you making snide comments about what happened to her I find insulting!"

 

"Oh she has a name alright, but because I'm a gentleman and out of deference to the ladies currently present I've chosen not to use it! But you are correct; my comment about what happened to her was in poor taste. Nobody, man or woman should have to suffer such a vile act in their life, and for that I do apologize Tsunade. But now back to my original question, what information have you learned from the girl?"

 

"We haven't learned anything. Sakura is still in a medically induced coma because of her injuries and is in a fragile state of mind right now. The girl is still reliving the nightmare of that night and is suffering horribly. I don't think she could handle an interrogation right now." Tsunade replies with sadness.

 

"That's just great! I don't give a damn how fragile her state of mind is right now. That girl could have vital information about what Orochimaru and Sasuke might be planning for the village and everyone in it, including Naruto or did you forget about that! You not wanting to interrogate the girl because she's suffering right now is truly pathetic Tsunade!" Jiraiya exclaims in a fury.

 

"I've put up with a lot from you this morning, but no more! Don't you dare try to tell me when I should hand someone over for interrogation. I'm telling you from a medical standpoint Sakura is in no shape mentally or physically to handle any type of questioning right now and that's final! Don't you ever question me when it comes to a medical decision on one of my patients! And for future reference, when you are in my presence, you shall refer to me as Hokage-Sama and nothing else. You got that?" Tsunade responds with equal fury.

 

"Oh forgive me my most majestic Hokage-Sama. Please allow this unruly peasant to remove himself from your regal presence at once." Jiraiya sarcastically replies, as he bows down and sweeps his arm in front of him before rising and adds.

 

"Fine Hokage-Sama, coddle the Haruno girl all you want! But it's a big gamble on your part. Let's hope it doesn't cost any lives because you're more worried about her than about any information she might have which could save lives in the future. I'm out of here!" Jiraiya spits with disgust before shimmering away into the air.

 

Tsunade could only stare at the spot Jiraiya was just standing in muted silence before she realized that Kakashi, Gai, Anko, and Yugao had still been present for that entire exchange she had with Jiraiya. Turning around, she walked back to her desk and sat down before issuing an order to all four Jounin.

 

"None of you is to repeat what you have seen and heard in this office today. Is that understood?"

 

"Hai Hokage-Sama." All the Jounin say in unison.

 

"Good you're all dismissed." Tsunade quietly says.

 

And with that said, all four Jounin bow and then leap off towards Hokage Mountain. Tsunande sits silently at her desk, as her mind is a jumble of emotions right now about her and Jiraiya. She had missed seeing the old fool greatly over the past few months. And now the first chance she's had to talk to him again, it degenerates into an ugly fight between the two of them. How did that happen? It's not what she wanted at all. Sighing to herself, she did realize that the pervert was right about one thing. She did need to question Sakura about what she might know in regards to Orochimaru and Sasuke, and she needed to be questioned soon. But so far every attempt they had made to awaken the girl had failed miserably. Due to the fact that every time she awoke, Sakura seemed to relive the attacks she suffered and was oblivious to everything else around her. Tsunade knew she must try something drastic to break Sakura out of her psychological prison. And when it came to the recesses of the human mind, there is only one person in Konoha to call for help in that area. Shouting for Shizune, she waited for her assistant to come in and says.

 

"Shizune, bring me Inoichi Yamanaka."

 

It was mid afternoon when Hinata had finished her training session with the rest of the Konoha 12. She had left Naruto asleep underneath a tree next to the training grounds and made her way over to join him. Sitting down and leaning back against the tree, Hinata cradled Naruto's head in her arms while he rested his head upon her chest. Sighing in contentment, Hinata closed her eyes and reveled in the feeling of holding Naruto. Suddenly, her eyes shot open in astonishment and she audibly yelped drawing the attention of the rest of the Konoha 12 who were relaxing around the field. Quickly looking down at Naruto, Hinata's face became beet red before she fainted from shock.

 

A few minutes later, Naruto began to stir from his slumber. He had no desire to awaken, as he was perfectly comfortable lying on the softest pillow in the world. It was only the shouts of what sounded like Neji's voice through the haze saying.

 

"I don't care if he is the fourth's son, I'm going to kill him!"

 

Eventually, Naruto groggily awoke from this shouting and looking out saw his friends and classmates staring at him intently. Neji had a murderous look to his eyes, while being held back by Kiba, Shino, Shikamaru, and Chouji. Tenten, Ino, and Temari all sported deep blushes as they stared at Naruto as well. Confused, Naruto asked with irritation.

 

"What are you all staring at? Haven't you ever seen a person asleep on a pillow before?"

 

"That's not a pillow Naruto." Shikamaru replies with a smirk.

 

'Not a pillow, what the Hell is he talking about?' Naruto thought to himself, as he turned his head to look at his pillow. The sight he beheld nearly made him pass out. For you see Naruto's head had been snuggled up and resting upon Hinata's left breast. But even worse was the fact that Naruto's left hand had somehow worked it's way underneath Hinata's blouse and was currently cupping Hinata's right breast. Looking up to Hinata's face, Naruto saw that her complexion was cherry red and that she had passed out at some point. What Naruto couldn't figure out was why she had a grin on her face as she slept? Turning back to his friend's, Naruto began to stammer.

 

"I, I, didn't know. I was asleep. You, you, guys know I'm not a pervert."

 

"Well, you're awake now, so why is your hand still inside Hinata's blouse Naruto?"

 

Naruto cringed at the sound of this voice and began to feel some rising killing intent directed towards him. Slowly turning his head to the right, Naruto found himself looking up into the face of one agitated Yuuhi Kurenai. And by the look on her face and the ever-growing killing intent he was feeling from her, Naruto could think of only one thing to say with fear gripping his soul.

 

"Oh crap!"

 

Authors Notes: This chapter is a comedy for the most part, and I hope everyone enjoys it. I had a lot of fun writing it. As always, if anyone wants to discuss the story in greater detail, just shoot me a PM. I enjoy talking about the story with the readers who really have an interest in it. I'll try to respond back to you as quickly as I can. To everyone, take care and take it easy!

 

Kingkakashi

 

PS: This chapter in no way is meant to condone underage drinking. It is simply a funny premise used for comedic purposes and valid considering the timeline period of the story. And I do firmly believe that in the Naruto universe, if you are asked to kill, you should be allowed to drink.