Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Over Coming Me ❯ wishful thinking ( Chapter 4 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

Chapter 4: Bitter Solitude

2 Weeks Later:

Kakashi made his way through the open gates of Konohagakure with the pale moonlight shining brightly over his shoulders. His eyes were heavy with sleep as his feet seemed to shuffle along the main road of the village.

He, along with Kiba and Chouji had just returned from a mission in the Thunder Country. All Kakashi wanted to do right now was fall face first into the comfort of his shuriken printed covers. Their mission had been decent enough. It hadn't taken them much time to actually find their target, but learning the truth of the situation and righting a few wrongs had taken the most time. Otherwise they could have been back in the village within the week.

Sounds of laughter caught his attention to the left and his dark orb slid to the corner of his heavy lidded eye to investigate. Two drunken friends lumbered their way out of the Shuriken Fountain singing a badly slurred drinking song as they headed off in the opposite direction.

Kakashi sighed while wondering if he had acted as foolish in front of his pink haired ex-student. A thought hit him then as he neared his apartment, he still hadn't thanked her for taking care of him. Of course, how could he when the Hokage had called him away that same night?

Kakashi sighed again as he realized that he still had no idea what he was going to do for his female friend. Truthfully he had forgotten his silent promise while away. Vaguely he wondered how she was doing but the promise of sleep pushed all other thoughts away.

`It can wait…so tired…'

The Copy Ninja's ever calculating mind ran over the things he needed to do first thing in the morning. Turning in his mission report came to mind as he rounded a corner. Thoughts of checking in on Naruto and Sasuke crossed his mind. He could always stop in at the ANBU HQ when he went to turn in the paperwork. It had been almost a month since the last time he saw them, but Kakashi knew first hand how things ran in the mysterious world of the elite masked ninja.

As Kakashi trudged past a familiar blue house its occupant crossed his mind's eye. She wasn't like Asuma and Kurenai who he could have an in-depth conversation with or like Anko and Gai who was always worth a good laugh or even Genma and Raidou who were great to have around to pick up women. Yet, somehow she wasn't such bad company either, besides Sakura was the only one who remained inside the village thus making her the most accessible.

The silver haired man had to admit that when he had first befriended the younger woman he had been afraid that she would end up being too clingy and too needy. He was more than thankful that it had not turned out to be so. Of course he hadn't been too worried about this with the boys.

Over the period of their slowly solidifying friendship Sakura never turned up at his doorstep and nor did she seek him out. He was free to seek out her company on his own time and on his own terms and for this he was more than grateful.

`Besides…I can't have people thinking things that aren't true. It would ruin my reputation with the ladies.'

This thought made him scowl slightly. He knew he was kidding himself. He had no such reputation. The last time he had intimate relations with a woman had been so long ago that he almost forgot what it felt like to even touch one. The only women he was around these days were Anko, Kurenai, Sakura and unfortunately the Hokage and all of these woman were absolutely off limits to him for more reasons than one.

Kurenai had that thing with Asuma, Anko had turned Iruka into her own personal man-whore, Tsunade was the Hokage who was one scary woman and Sakura…

He wasn't even sure why his analytical mind had just lumped her in with the rest to begin with. He wasn't blind to the fact that she had filled out in all the right places, but Sakura was…well Sakura.

Now Kakashi was well aware that age was one of those things that didn't matter in the world of shinobi. Really when one was taught the ways of murder so young who had the right to tell them that they couldn't discover the sins of the flesh as well? When you blur one line, it's only natural that others follow suit.

Hell, he had even seen gender being tossed to the four winds, much less age. Bonds always seemed to form in the strangest of places and at the strangest of times; Anko and Iruka were proof of that.

Besides, Sakura had seen and done things other 21 year old woman could only conjure up in nightmares. Other women her age were busy either trying to start a career or settling down and raising a family. Sakura was a shinobi and a damn good one at that.

But even though Sakura was an experienced ninja she still wasn't emotionally hardened like Anko and Kurenai who knew that life wasn't some fairytale. There were no happy endings to the story. A kunoichi's future did not hold a loving husband or a set of rambunctious children. If they were lucky they would find a kindred spirit to become their sanctuary during their downtime, but sadly it hardly ever progressed past this.

Even if he was attracted to Sakura, which currently he wasn't, he would never even think about touching her. It wasn't even the fact that he had known her since she was twelve; it had more to do with the fact that the girl was emotionally unstable.

The Copy Ninja knew he was incapable of love and thus he knew that any type of relationship with the young cherry blossom that went past mere friendship was out of the question. Thus, he was thankful that he wasn't drawn to her in that way.

Kakashi chalked up her name being slipped into his mental conversation due to his lack of female contact. He vowed to himself as he finally walked through his apartment door that he would remedy that problem and soon.

For now, the sandman came calling as soon as his fully clothed body sunk into the softness of his bed.

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“Hey Kakashi-sensei! Kakashi-sensei!”

Naruto's raised voice echoed horribly off the walls of the Jounin HQ building, earning quite a few glares in their direction. The blonde man earned a solid smack to the back of his unruly head from the similarly clad black and white uniformed man beside him. Sasuke's voice was full of annoyance as he spoke.

“Baka, must you be so loud…”

The Jounin in question turned around to see two masked ANBU members heading his way. He had just left the administration office where he had dropped off the mission report. It looked like he was going to be able to check off two things from his to-do list for the day.

The group of three friends stopped short from each other in the middle of the ground floor of the HQ. Kakashi could tell even with Naruto's mask on that the young man was excited about something. The kyuubi container was practically bouncing on his heels. Kakashi rolled his droopy eye as he spoke.

“Naruto, I told you that you can stop calling me that already. It makes me feel…old.”

Kakashi's slouch became more pronounced as Naruto scratched the back of his masked head nervously. Sasuke's aloof voice spoke up next to his best friend.

“But you are.”

The silver haired man glared daggers into the dark eyes that stared back at him from behind a red and white mask. Naruto broke the slight tension with his customary loud jubilant voice.

“Aw, you know force of habit and all... Hey, Hey! Kakashi, you're coming out to the Shuriken Fountain tonight right?”

Kakashi eyed his excited friend questioningly. The Copy Ninja could tell from the way he had said it that his attendance seemed for lack of a better word…mandatory. Kakashi's question was posed with caution as he crossed his arms.

“Why…?”

Naruto crossed his arms smugly.

“Hmph, figures you'd forget…I bet you even forget your own.”

Kakashi raised a silver eyebrow as Sasuke answered his unspoken question.

“Sakura's birthday. Supposedly we're taking her out for drinks.”

Ah, now Kakashi understood. He had forgotten. The older ninja was never good with remembering things like that, but then again he would never let on that the blonde haired one had been right either. He had his pride.

“Of course I remember. I didn't know there was anything planned.”

He earned a disbelieving grunt from the Uchiha while Naruto took the bait hook line and sinker.

“Oh, so that means your coming right? Sakura would be pretty disappointed if all the members of Team 7 weren't there even though I'm much better company than an old pervert and Mr. `I'm-better-than-you' over here!”

Naruto nudged his dark haired friend playfully while both the Copy Ninja and the Uchiha's fists shook at their sides. As Naruto's laughter reached its peek he was suddenly silenced with two fists simultaneously hitting the sides of his head.

“Ow, damn it!”

Kakashi composed himself with a nonchalant hand running through his hair. Sasuke simply grunted again and turned his head to the side, away from his so called friend.

“What time?”

Naruto quickly forgot his pain and beamed at his masked friend with a kilowatt smile. Sasuke rolled his eyes behind his mask as he turned back to the conversation.

“8 o'clock sharp…don't be late.”

Naruto's mood switched on the drop of a dime yet again. His arms crossed over his chest as he attempted to appear stoic in front of his clearly unimpressed friend. Kakashi grunted a response as he held up a gloved hand in a goodbye as he turned to go. Naruto called after him.

“You're coming right? Hey, he's coming right?”

Sasuke left his clueless friend still watching the Copy Ninja's departure. The Uchiha headed down the ANBU basement corridor as Naruto caught up with him, their business for the day not over yet. Sasuke finally answered his friend as they neared their separation point.

“He's coming.”

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Kakashi made his way down the busy main road of the village. Vendors were trading their wares all around him and kids played ball in the street at his feet. It looked like another item had been added to his list for the day.

`What does one get a kunoichi for her birthday?'

It was a harder question to answer than the type given in a chuunin exam. Buying his three teammates presents once they made Jounin was one thing but buying something for a young woman on her birthday was another. Could he get away with buying her a new kunai pouch again?

Kakashi wasn't so sure, but he wasn't about to drop by a candy or jewelry shop either. He had his pride.

Just then a flash of white and red caught his eye. His heart leapt inside his chest at his good fortune. He walked up beside his savior who was currently eyeing some apples at a stand.

“Kurenai.”

The ruby eyed kunoichi's orbs never left the delectable fruit in front of her as she spoke.

“To what do I owe this honor Kakashi? I take it you want something.”

Kakashi sweat dropped next to the woman who plucked her choice of ripe apples from the wooden crates. He figured there was no use beating around the bush, besides it was never his style.

“I need you to do me a favor.”

The genjutsu master snorted as she moved to pay for her fruit. Her voice was amused as she sized him up out of the corner of her eye.

“Figures, just tell me it doesn't involve Gai.”

The last time he had asked her for a favor it had been to distract Gai so his eternal rival could make his escape. The leotard wearing man had caught him just as he had been heading to the bathroom. Kurenai had ended up wasting an entire hour of her life watching the `Green Beast of Konoha' trying out his new `Good Guy' poses.

Needless to say it was an event she never wanted to witness again.

“I need you to pick out a gift that a young woman might like for her birthday.”

Kurenai scowled. Her voice sounded disgusted as she spoke.

“I'm not helping you get in some unsuspecting girls pants Hatake. I didn't know you went the Genma route. The answer is no.”

She started walking away from her stunned silver haired friend. Genma had asked her the same thing only a week ago and she had told him the same thing. It was an insult to her, almost like a slap in the face really. Shinobi hardly ever bought things for kunoichi. They were all too afraid they'd develop feelings for them and if they did it was things like a new kunai pouch....

Her relationship with Asuma was the closest thing she was ever going to get to marriage. She knew what it was, but she tried to act like she didn't care, like it didn't tear her up inside. It had been years and the man still hadn't said the words `I love you' to her.

She knew he was afraid, hell all male shinobi were cowards and that's why most turned to the village women. The few that did choose kunoichi, well…let's just say there is a reason a hand full of Genin are from broken homes. It's a rough childhood when both your parents are taken so soon.

There were reasons why most shinobi males sought comfort from the regular village women instead of kunoichi. They were the one's you could send packing in the morning to never see again much less run the risk of having to be teamed with them for an important mission. Besides they were the ones you married because you never had to worry about them getting killed off on some mission. They were the ones who bore your children because they stayed within the walls of the village. It seemed cruel and bias but these were the cold hard facts.

These were also the exact reasons why the Uchiha Sasuke had turned his interest to a village woman instead of the many kunoichi who had been pining after him for years. No kunoichi could help him revive his clan. What dedicated female ninja could become a demur stay at home mother after being submerged so long in the shinobi lifestyle? Those that did silently ended up resenting their husbands.

Kurenai could understand their reasoning but it didn't make it any less painful. Why should the woman of this village who chose to fight along side the men be treated so.

Kakashi caught up with the irate female. The man wasn't stupid; he could guess the reasoning behind that scowl. He decided he better tell her who it's for before his help slipped through his fingers.

“It's Sakura's birthday.”

Kurenai stopped in her tracks beside him. Suddenly he felt a manicured fist hit the side of his head. Kurenai all but growled as she turned on him.

“Why didn't you say so in the first place!”

Kakashi smartly kept his mouth shut as he rubbed his new bump. Seriously, sometimes he didn't know what Asuma saw in her. True, she had a nice figure and her eyes were kind of exotic but her right hook reminded him of Sakura. That was never a good thing. He had seen the havoc those fists could reap on Naruto.

Kurenai huffed as she held out her hand and tapped her sandaled foot. Kakashi stood there bewildered as he continued to sorrowfully rub his throbbing wound. The woman's impatient voice cleared his confusion.

“Money please. Hey don't think I'm using my own!”

Kakashi sighed as he dejectedly pulled out his slim and light weight wallet. He was thankful that he had indeed just gotten paid from a mission. He sighed again as he handed the woman a few bills. He could swear that he saw her red orbs sparkle at the prospect of…shopping. Kurenai suppressed a girlish squeal as she spoke.

“I know just what to get her!”

Kakashi just hoped it wasn't anything embarrassing since it was going to be coming from him in the first place.

“Just drop it off when you're done.”

“Alright, I'll have Asuma do it since you two live in the same building.”

Kakashi turned to leave as the woman headed off into the crowd. He heard her amused voice float over his shoulder as he continued in his path.

“I'm keeping whatever's left over as payment for my services!”

Kakashi mumbled something about where she could stick those services under his breath. It looked like a nap was the next thing on his lackadaisical agenda. He argued that he needed to save his energy if he was going to be bringing someone back to his apartment that night.

He had planned to show up at the proffered bar even before Naruto had roped him into it. He stilled had to do something about his apparent lack of female interaction. At least now, he had an excuse to be out. Hell, he could use the whole line on how birthdays made him feel old and how he was in need of something to distract himself.

Hey, what could he say? Pickup lines weren't exactly his forte. Now killing and tracking he could deal with.

`At least I don't have to worry about paying Sakura back anymore. Kurenai is fixing that problem as we speak…'

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Kakashi strolled into the bar in his usual lateness with a neatly wrapped silver and blue present wedged comfortably in between his arm and his side. His hands were as usual stuffed into his pockets. Truthfully he had no idea what the square shaped slim box contained.

Asuma hadn't said so when he came by to drop it off and Kakashi hadn't even thought to ask. The only thing the cancer stick wielding shinobi had asked was if he was going to be up for some drinking that night.

The silver haired man was thankful, his three ex-students were great and all but he could only stand having the two boys around for so long until he felt like pulling out his hair. Sakura he could deal with. For some reason she liked to sit there and listen to the old stories they shared about past missions. He didn't understand it, but he wasn't about to complain.

As Kakashi made his way through the crowd to the back of the bar, he noticed that Naruto had turned this into quite the celebration. Some of the old `Rookie 9' were gathered around the usual table along with the rest of his own peers.

The birthday girl was sitting in between both her two favorite men with a rather large stack of gifts in front of her. Kakashi noticed that Sakura had even worn some makeup for the special occasion. Personally he thought she looked better without it, but then again who was he to judge.

He slid his present onto the table with the rest of them as he gave her the age old `Happy Birthday' line before taking the seat next to Genma who sat directly in front of her. Kakashi could guess why his friend had chosen that seat. His brown haired friend had told him before how single females got on their birthday. He vaguely remembered something about loneliness and him being just what the doctor ordered.

Kakashi could already tell that the toothpick sucking shinobi was trying to put the moves on his pink haired friend. Kakashi sighed as Iruka passed him a drink from his other side. Really, Sakura had plainly made it clear that she wasn't interested but he had to give Genma credit for persistence. Kakashi loosely hoped that the orally fixated ninja's theory wasn't correct. Then again, she had Naruto and Sasuke to watch out for her, besides it wasn't like he was her father.

`She's a kunoichi. She can take care of herself.'

Gai was busy weeping happily with his mini replica across from him. TenTen sat next to Lee. The brown haired weaponmaster didn't look so enthused that her ex-sensei and old teammate chose to sit so close to her. Kakashi somewhat felt sorry for the girl.

Anko chose to sit on the lap of her scarred nosed lover next to the older fuzzy browed man. Asuma sat next to Kurenai who was busy having a conversation with TenTen. Just then the birthday girl addressed him sarcastically.

“Thanks for finally showing up. You didn't have to get me anything, but I'm sure I'll like whatever it is.”

Kakashi smiled back at her and that's when he noticed the drink in her hand. Her regular beverage had been replaced with an alcoholic one this time. Still, he wasn't worried. Even though Sakura had never been one to drink, she was always the responsible type. He recalled the lecture she had given him before.

“Of course I'd come Sakura. It's not like I had anything better to do…”

He had meant it as a joke, but it hadn't gone over well. He easily dodged the straw she threw his way. His voice was consoling as he tried to simmer her anger.

“Come now, you know it was a joke.”

Genma snorted beside him.

“Don't let him fool you Sakura. The old man has no life.”

Naruto smirked from across the table.

“Look who's talking…”

Genma threw his soggy piece of wood at the blonde man. Sakura laughed at the two as Sasuke merely shook his head. Naruto looked to the empty seat on the other side of Genma.

“Hey where's Raidou?”

Genma sighed.

“Mission.”

Sakura sighed and then took a swig from her drink before she added more to his answer.

“Ino's with him, I think Shino and Kiba are too.”

Genma patted her hand as he gave her his form of comfort.

“Aw, don't worry Sakura. I'll keep you company. No one should be alone on their birthday.”

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the man as Sakura politely moved her hand out of Genma's reach. Naruto was busy whispering to Iruka about how it was shameful to let a woman have so much hold on him while Anko conversed with Gai. Sasuke's voice held just the slightest edge to it as he spoke.

“She's not.”

Genma wasn't to be detoured however.

“Please, at the end of the night Naruto's gonna be with the Hyuuga and you're gonna go visit that woman of yours. So who's going to keep our little cherry blossom here company then huh?”

Sakura tried to put her two cents in, but Sasuke never backed down from a challenge.

“TenTen or Kakashi.”

Genma snorted as the man in question almost choked on his drink. The brown haired man jabbed his thumb in the direction of the man sitting next to him.

“You mean to tell me you'd trust her in his hands over mine!”

Sasuke grunted as he crossed his arms.

“He's seen her in action; he knows what he's up against.”

Now the Copy Ninja was never one to divulge personal information but he thought he had better speak up before he was unceremoniously chosen as Sakura's caretaker for the night.

“Actually I was going to…”

Sakura's hand smacked the table making its contents rattle dangerously. Her voice barked over the loud din and more than a few heads turned her way as she regarded the men around her.

“How dare you talk about me that way and like I'm not even here no less! Oh, you men just make me so mad! I'm 21 today not 12! I can take care of myself damn it and I'm not going home with anyone tonight!”

Sakura's chest was heaving as she glared heatedly at the two men. The two men in question glared at each other, each blaming the other for the woman's outburst. Naruto patted the angered woman's shoulder consolingly.

“Aw, forget them Sakura-chan… How about you open your presents! I can't wait till you see what I got you!”

The pink haired kunoichi's mood changed instantly as she greedily took Naruto's present from his outstretched hands. Her nimble fingers tore off the wrapping in under 0.5 seconds.

“Uh, thanks Naruto…I like them a lot.”

In her hands she held a box of white painted shuriken with pink cherry blossoms decorating the surface of each. Naruto let out relieved laughter beside her.

“Great! It was a real pain finding them, had to have them hand painted and all!”

Sakura smiled gratefully down at her whiskered friend.

“You didn't have to.”

`You really didn't have to.'

Sasuke nonchalantly nudged his wrapped gift in front of the birthday girl next. Again it took less time to open her new present than it did to suck in air.

“Thanks…Sasuke.”

She only got a grunt and a nod of the head in reply. She was holding an expensive looking curved dagger. Like her new shuriken from Naruto it too had decorative cherry blossoms adorning the ivory handle.

`Why is it that everyone thinks pink is my favorite color? Is it because of my hair? Don't these fools know that the color of my hair has been the bane of my existence next to this wide forehead??'

She quickly reached out and grabbed the next box closest to her.It just so happed to be Kakashi's. Sakura read the tag and gave the older shinobi a thankful smile.

`What this will probably be a matching kunai set or something…'

The silver haired man inconspicuously turned to his `little helper' who gave him a thumbs up as Sakura tore into the wrapping.

Kakashi felt his heart stop as his female friend pulled her new prize out of the cardboard box. Kurenai, TenTen, and even Anko's eyes sparked as they gazed upon Sakura's gift. Sakura's mouth was dropped open; she was speechless to say the least. She had been hoping to get a gift along these lines but she certainly hadn't expected it from her ex-sensei… her male ex-sensei.

The men at the table all turned to the gift giver with incredulous gazes. Kakashi's hand tightened around his drink as Genma started laughing.

Anko leaned over to whisper in the flustered Copy Ninja's ear.

“Oh, you're a brave one Kakashi. It takes a certain sort of man to buy that!”

It took a certain sort of man indeed. Only one place sold that particular item and it just so happened to be the one and only store meant for woman

Kasumi's Boutique was a haven for lingerie, yayoi books and sexual toys meant only for women…and the occasional male.

Genma spoke through the tears that had cascaded down his handsome face.

“Hey I can autograph that for you if you want Sakura! Since, you know I'm on page 10!”

Sakura almost dropped her new Men of Konoha Calender where the male models were exposed in all their manly glory on every marvelous page. By this time her face was beet red. Kurenai snorted from down the table.

“Yeah, just black that one out Sakura. That's what I did to mine. I wouldn't want your eyes to bleed.”

Genma scowled down at the woman. Naruto was the first to start in on the man who tried not to feel so god awful uncomfortable. He was a shinobi and as a shinobi he remembered rule #4, never show weakness. Naruto's speech was a little hard to decipher since he was speaking through his robust laughter.

“Oh, ha-ha-ha-ha..my god..ha-ha-ha-ha…I can't believe…ha-ha-ha-ha..!”

Asuma was next and thankfully his laughter wasn't so uncontrolled, it was even funnier to him since he knew the truth.

“I didn't know you were in to that Kakashi. Tell us when did you upgrade to a swinging door?”

Gai and Lee made it even worse.

“Forget his words Kakashi! I am humbled by my eternal rival's open boldness! Let us not make light of his admission, let us embrace his courageous alternative lifestyle for he is our brother in arms and it is only right for us to support his choice of male on male relations!”

Lee's eyes became a silently flowing waterfall across from him.

“Gai sensei! You are so right! We must not ridicule but embrace his choice! So wise my sensei!”

Their words had the complete opposite effect on the table. Almost everyone except Sakura and Kakashi were drowning in tears of laughter. Even the ever stoic Uchiha had to turn away to hide his mirth.

Kakashi stayed completely silent through the whole exchange, not wanting to give them the ammunition they so desired. Besides he couldn't very well say that he had literally paid Kurenai to pick out Sakura's gift. Sakura would no doubt be upset at his callousness and he also didn't want to risk making her mad.

The birthday girl blushed red faced and kept her eyes averted from his as she placed her gift at the bottom of the pile.

“Um, I…I really like it Kakashi. T-thank you.”

The silver haired man gave her a slight head nod as he too didn't look in her direction.

`I could seriously hurt Kurenai right now…'

Kakashi chanced a glance down the table to Kurenai who gave him a wink in return.

`Yes, I could seriously do some damage to that woman…'

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As the night drew to a close Sakura ended up with lots of new weapons and weapon holders from the males…except Kakashi of course and things that were a lot more feminine from the woman except Anko. The loud mouthed woman had gotten Sakura a black leather whip.

Sakura had blushed again that night as Anko explained how it could be used for more than just a mere weapon. Of course the male shinobi beneath her had blushed the brightest as his `mistress' explained the item's many uses in graphic detail. Kakashi noticed how the scarred man seemed to flinch at hearing the crack of the whip as Anko demonstrated how it needed a certain flick of the wrist.

Both Iruka and Sakura seemed thankful when the dango obsessed woman moved on to another subject.

It was getting late and even Genma had procured a companion for the night after he acknowledged that Sakura was a lost cause. Raidou's seat was now occupied by a buxom redhead.

It even looked as though a drunken TenTen found comfort in Gai's protégé. The older taijutsu master was beaming proudly at his favorite students new found…love. Of course Kurenai was going home with Asuma just as Iruka would with the feisty Anko. No doubt Naruto was plotting to visit Hinata just as Sasuke planned on visiting his own woman.

Sakura looked slightly tipsy but coherent enough to make it home on her own. Kakashi figured he had better get a move on too if he was going to find himself a warm body to keep him company.

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Sakura sat rather tipsily in her seat as she watched Kakashi excuse himself from the table.

`No doubt heading to the bathroom… How that man can drink like a fish without showing his face is beyond me…'

As Sakura hazily looked around the table she silently scowled. Everyone had somebody or was going home to somebody. Even Gai had managed to corner a woman. The only one that didn't have anyone was her and Kakashi.

In a way she was grateful that her ex-sensei lived the A-sexual life. It was times like this that she felt closer to him. She didn't feel so bad since she wasn't alone in being alone. She wondered if Kakashi would walk her home since she just might need the help.

`Of course he would…he owes me.'

That thought made her smile. She remembered what it felt like to be needed and she had to admit that she liked it. Naruto conspiratorially leaned in front of Sakura as he elbowed her in the side.

“Hey Sasuke, Sakura, it looks like Kakashi isn't a little … you know… after all.”

Sakura rolled her eyes as she replied annoyed.

“Oh course he isn't baka, he's…”

But her voice faded as her emerald eyes followed Naruto's vision. There stood Kakashi in the back of the bar half in the cover of shadow whispering in some brown haired beauty's ear.

Sasuke grunted out his semi-drunken reply.

“Hmph, who would have thought…”

`Who would have thought…'

Sakura watched the brunette smile shyly at her ex-sensei and nod in a `yes' manner right before he turned to head back toward the table. Naruto was smirking at him as he approached. The Copy Ninja's words hammered the final nail in her coffin of loneliness.

“Well, I'm off.”

As Kakshi lay out some money on the table to pay for his tab Sakura felt a tightness in her chest. It was reminiscent to the feeling she had gotten while laying awake in that forest the time they had, what she now refers to as `the talk'.

It was utterly irrational and totally without cause but she couldn't shake the feeling of being…betrayed.

`This is stupid I should be happy for him. He probably hasn't been with a woman for…who knows how long! …but still…I thought for sure…'

She knew she was being selfish. Hadn't she promised herself that she wouldn't relay on her `guys' anymore? She had no right to expect Kakashi to walk her home. He had his own life to live that didn't revolve around Team 7 anymore.

`…but…it's my birthday…I thought…at least he would…'

Sakura pasted on a smile as Kakashi smiled at her before he turned to go back to the woman now waiting for him outside.

“Happy Birthday Sakura…I'm sorry if my present embarrassed you.”

Sakura quickly waved him off.

“No, don't worry. I wanted one actually.”

Kakashi smiled down at her as she tried to keep her skin from turning colors at her honest admission.

“Well goodnight, hope you had fun.”

Sakura tried to nod her head enthusiastically.

“Yeah, I did…. Hope you do too…”

She had desperately tried to keep the words and her disappointment from leaking out into her voice but a tiny bit had been able to slip by unchecked. She hoped he didn't notice, but his slight pause alerted her that he had. Regardless he finally raised his gloved hand in a farewell and headed for the exit.

Sakura's mood was totally shattered as she watched through the window as the two passed by. A sigh escaped that did not go unnoticed by one.

“Sakura. Is everything alright?”

Sasuke's concerned tone made her feel even worse. She didn't want to tell him that she was just feeling sorry for herself. He'd probably offer to walk her home out of pity. She didn't want pity. What she wanted was a man of her own. She was 21 now and still as experienced in the matters of love as she had been at the age of 12.

`I'm pathetic…'

Her steadily blurring eyes glanced over Genma who was currently whispering into his giggling companion's ear. The steadily sinking in effects of the drink and the sight before her made Sakura feel even worse.

`Maybe I shouldn't have turned him away…'

Sakura shook her head as she decided that thought meant it was time for her to go. Sakura gathered her many things as she made the announcement that the birthday girl was finally heading home.

As she tried to stand she found her legs to be a lot less stable than she had first thought, but still strong enough to drag herself home on her own. However, her two equally soused companions were not about to let that happen.

Pretty soon she found herself being carried on the back of the blonde man while the dark haired one carried her newly acquired things. Even though the inebriated pink haired kunoichi protested loudly she was secretly grateful to have their company if only for the short walk to her house. Vaguely she wandered what their missing member was doing at that moment but quickly forced that thought from her mind. She desperately tried not to let the bitterness wash over her.

Once they had placed her things on her downstairs kitchen table and deposited the semi-drunken woman on her fluffy bed they said their goodbyes and made their exit.

The icy hand of solitude set it once more as she laid there in the darkness.

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Kakashi vaguely wandered if Genma's theory had been correct.

`Was that actually disappointment I heard in her voice as I said my goodbyes?'

He was just starting to wander if it had been such a good idea to leave her behind like he had…

`Hadn't Genma wondered who was going to make sure she got home alright?'

…but the squeeze of a feminine hand on his arm as he escorted his companion back to his place for the night brought him out of his train of thoughts.

`She'll be alright.'

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Sakura found herself sitting in the whicker chair by the bedroom window. She had finally managed to pry the window open to let the cold winter air wash over her sake warmed skin. The chilling breeze felt good on her hot flesh as she gazed up at the moon.

`At least this way I can imagine that there's at least one other person in this world doing the same thing…feeling the same way…'

Her dismal attempt at self comfort made the silent tears finally drip from her lashes. Normally she wouldn't let herself become so emotionally distraught, but what with it being her birthday and the effects of the drink…

`Maybe there is someone out there for me. Someone who will finally return my love…and maybe just maybe that someone is gazing up at this very same moon just as lonely as I am…'

The rational side of Sakura knew it was hopeless to wish for such things. If she learned anything while being a shinobi it was that wishful thinking was useless, but right now it was the only comfort she had available and she chose to cling to it.

Sakura buried her head in her knees as she finally let the painful seclusion wash over her.

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A half naked Hatake Kakashi stared up into the beauty that was the full moon as he rested his head forehead against the cold hard glass of his living room window. After the few lust filled exertions he had participated in over the years, he found him self unable to sleep.

Part of it was due to insomnia and another part was the need to immediately distance himself from his female company. It was a `survival technique' he had developed on his own.

It was funny though, no matter how fulfilling the experience was he was always left feeling slightly empty inside. He guessed the feeling was a good thing though. It meant it was easier to let her leave in the morning, never to return.

Vaguely Kakashi wondered how a certain pink haired woman had gotten home, but just like the last time the thought was quickly dismissed, but this time not by the touch of a woman, but by the sweet call of the sandman.

Kakashi lay down for sleep on his worn in couch for the night as his guest slumbered away in his bed in the other room.

`I did explain to her before hand that this was a one time deal…'

Kakashi situated himself better on the piece of furniture before he shut his eyes.

`Maybe I should stop by and see Sakura in the morning, make sure she got home alright…'

Kakashi finally fell asleep, he wasn't even aware of the small smile that had formed.

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Author's Footnote:

So far it looks like this is going to be another long one. For those who like action there may not be a whole lot of that till later…way later. Right now I want to strengthen their friendship.

Oh, just wanted to point out that in the manga during the whole `Kakashi Gaiden' arc we find out that it is indeed customary for the sensei and the teammates to give gifts to the one who makes Jounin on the team. So thus, I had Kakashi mention he had gotten her a kunai pouch previously. Otherwise I believe that was the only time he ever bought something for some…

I have ideas forming in my head for the plot for this but please bear with me…it's kinda hard to come up with fresh ideas that I or someone else hasn't used already. Like I said before there's only so many brain cells in this small little head of mine! XD

Well thank you for reading this or at least scanning through!!