Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Photograph ❯ Missing ( Chapter 8 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
Theme #8: our own world
----
“Hi, Temari-san!” Lee handed his mission scroll to the chunin behind the desk before jogging down the hallway of the Kazekage's tower.
Temari paused, letting the shinobi catch up. She was balancing a tray of food in her hands, and had a scroll tucked under her arm. “Welcome back, Lee-san. How was your mission?”
“A complete success! Those bandits will not be bothering any more villages. I also had time to have a cultural exchange with the sand-nins that were assigned to me. It was very educational.” Lee scratched at the side of his nose. “Some of the things that the residents of Suna consider delicacies were difficult to try, but I was able to persevere with the power of youth!”
The wind master paused. “What did they feed you, Lee-san?”
“I believe it was an insect. I didn't really stop to count the legs, since I was more concerned with it fighting back. They only found one, but they insisted that I have the opportunity to try this rare delicacy!”
Slumping against the wall, Temari bumped her head against the rough surface. “Were you sick the next day?”
“Now that you mention it, I did feel a bit off the next day.”
“I'm going to kill them. The last time they pulled that stunt on a foreign shinobi, the poor guy ended up in the hospital for a week.” Shaking her head, she set off down the hallway again. “You're tougher then you look, Lee-san. They should have been carrying you back after eating a giant sand beetle. Good thing, too. Tsunade would be pissed if we managed to get you killed, even if you are on loan to us.”
“Um, thank you?” Lee trotted along after her.
“You're welcome. Any reason why you're following me?”
“I was actually on my way to Gaara's office. I did tell him that I would report as soon as I was back.”
“He's not there.”
“Oh, did he take the day off? He does work very hard.”
“Sort of.” Temari shoved the door to the office open, revealing Kankuro sitting in Gaara's spot.
“It's about time! I'm wasting away here!” Before the tray had even settled on the desk, Kankuro had grabbed a rice ball.
“You're welcome.” Temari dragged a chair over. “So, any luck?”
“Don't worry about it. That cranky old bastard called a break so he could come up with some clever and nasty argument, but he doesn't have anyone in his camp that's as clever as me or as nasty as you. Don't get your panties in a twist.” Kankuro dragged a hand through his hair and his unpainted face twisted into a grimace. “It's still a pain in the ass. The brat owes me.”
Lee raised a tentative hand. “Um, Kankuro-san, what's going on?”
“Huh? Oh, hey, bushy brows. When did you get in?”
“Just now. Where is Gaara?”
“Damned if I know.” Kankuro dragged a paper towards him and grabbed a pen. “Negotiations with the Grass Country have completely collapsed. After he attacked the envoy from Grass, Gaara disappeared. I'm putting things back together.”
“He what?” Lee actually took half a step back. “There has to be a mistake.”
“No mistake, bushy brows. I was in the hall when the yelling started. I managed to grab him before he finished that damn diplomat off.” Kankuro propped a leg up on the desk, showing off a series of bandages, and tugged up his shirt to show more damage. “He really didn't like being pulled off of his prey. After that he just jutsued away.”
Slowly shaking his head, Lee moved back towards the desk. “Shukaku is gone, and Gaara doesn't just attack people.”
Temari sighed, dropping her scroll onto the crowded desk. “Lee, we figured this out just after Chiyo brought Gaara back. The psychosis, the anger, and even some of the voices were not just from Shukaku. Those are Gaara, too. He's so much better now, since the only voices he has to deal with are coming from his own head, but he's still unstable. It wasn't the one tail, it was his life that made him that way. Naruto doesn't go on killing sprees, and he's still hauling Kyubi around.”
“Don't say that. He is a well respected shinobi, and the Kazekage. Gaara's not a monster that goes on killing sprees.”
“No, he's not, but he's not the calm mask he uses, either. He learned so much control when he had Shukaku. He can go for months without even a crack showing, but then something happens and he loses control. That's when the part of him that he keeps locked up comes out, and all hell breaks loose. There's nothing we can do but stay away and make sure no one gets hurt.”
Lee's hands clenched into fists. “You're his sister! You're supposed to believe in him!”
“You think I don't know that?! Why do you think we're in here covering for him? Being Kazekage, protecting this village, those are his reasons to exist. I can't let them be taken away!” Temari ran a hand across her eyes, flinching away from the accusing look, while her voice dropped to a ragged whisper. “He's come so far. I do believe in him, but I can't ignore what he does.”
“Back off, Lee,” Kankuro growled. He set his hands on the desk as he rose from his chair. “This is hard enough for her.”
It was Lee's turn to flinch. “I'm sorry, Temari-san. I shouldn't have said that.”
“Forget it.” Temari waved her hand in a vague gesture, visibly recollecting herself. “He'll be back in a couple of days, exhausted and probably bloody, but he'll have his control back.”
“Why?” Lee looked around the office as though hunting for a clue. “Why did he attack the envoy? You can't tell me that he did it for no reason.”
Kankuro snorted. “Oh, I'm sure there was a reason. That son of a bitch diplomat was talking shit from the moment he arrived, and Gaara's been a real pain in the ass for about a week and a half now. I should have seen this one coming and kept him out of there. This is more my fault then anyone's. The bastard from Grass probably threatened the village. Or Temari. Damn, if I found out that idiot threatened her, I'd be surprised that I got there in time. He's really protective of her.”
Temari grumbled something about overprotective little brothers.
Lee worried at one of his bandages. “So, where is he?”
“We're in Suna, bushy brows. If he's outside of the village, which is a safe bet since we would hear about it if he was trashing the village, then where else is there?” Kankuro watched Lee for a second before sighing. “He's in the desert.”
“Shouldn't we . . . you know . . . go after him?”
Kankuro studied Lee, the question of `how many times were you dropped on your head as a child' clearly written on his face. “And why would we do that? He's in the middle of unleashing hell. I say let him get it out of his system. I don't need anymore sand burns for today, thanks a bunch. I'm still getting it out of his handiwork from earlier today. Can I just take a second here to mention that I hate sand? It gets in your cuts, in your eyes, in your boxers, in your ears . . . ”
“But, if he's not in his right mind . . . “
“Man, listen to me. Gaara. Of the Desert. Is in the desert. Key word: desert. He's safer out there then anywhere else in the world. Doesn't matter if he's in his right mind, left mind, or completely out of his mind. No one is going to mess with him.” Kankuro dropped back into his chair.
“Well, I just got back from a mission, so I'm going to head back to my room and . . . “ Lee turned around and headed for the door.
“Don't even think about it, bushy brows. I can see what you're planning, and don't even think about it.”
There was an airy wave over a departing shoulder. “Oh, don't worry, Kankuro-san, I'm not going to get hurt.”
Kankuro stood back up. “Don't make me do something nasty to keep you from doing something really fucking stupid.”
Lee turned back towards the siblings, pausing in the doorway to smile brightly. “Nonsense, Kankuro-san! You'd have to catch me, first.”
“What the fuck . . . “
Lee was gone, leaving only two sets of weights to show that he had even been there. Somewhere in the desert, Gaara was hurting and alone. He wasn't sure how he could help, or even if he could, but he was not going to leave his friend alone. `Besides, I promised I would report to him as soon as I got back.'
The residents of Sungakure grabbed onto their belongings as a streak of green raced through the village, creating a small shockwave that knocked down laundry and frightened small animals. Once in the desert, the sand was kicked up in a wave behind the racing shinobi. It was not hard to find Gaara. He simply went in the direction that his survival instincts insisted was a `very bad direction!'. It took hours to run across the unending sand dunes, putting miles between himself and Sungakure.
As he got closer, Lee could smell the ozone. The air almost seemed to crackle with tension. His steps slowed until his was only jogging along. It would be pretty hard to miss the destruction. Bare rock had been exposed, as though a giant broom had come through and pushed all of the sand aside. The missing sand was busy destroying a cliff, digging into it and hammering the once immovable object into dust. Standing at the edge of the battle zone, a young man with blood red hair swayed ever so slightly, his hands clasped together.
`I've had better ideas then this.' Lee slowed to a walk. He kept his hands loose and at his sides, clearly visible. Gaara made no sign of noticing him, but the sand was shifting wildly around him. Walls would begin to form, then collapse before they had even reached waist height. It was almost as if the sand was not sure whether or not to let Lee approach. The shinobi ignored the warnings and continued to approach until he was just behind Gaara.
One jade eye looked back over a shoulder, making eye contact. The sand snaked around Lee's legs, holding him firmly in place. Slowly, Gaara turned around to face him. “Lee.”
“Uh, hi, Gaara-san! How are things?”
Gaara prowled around him, looking him over like an interesting exhibit at a museum. The sand tightened around Lee's legs. Old memories replayed themselves in his mind as the pressure increased. `No, no, it's not like that. He's different. I know he is.'
“What are you doing out here, Lee?”
“Just . . . just checking up on you, Gaara-san. And you told me to report as soon as I got back.”
“Checking up on me? Reporting?” Gaara smirked at his captive. “Perhaps you are as crazy as they say you are.”
“They said . . . “
The Kazekage's expression twisted and he suddenly turned away. “Get out of here, Lee. We already know that my sand has a taste for you.”
With a final, painful squeeze, the sand fell away. “I'd rather stay, Gaara-san.”
Gaara turned back around, puzzlement clear on his face. “What?”
“I don't have the chakra control you do, but when I'm this upset, it helps to hit things. Maybe that will make you feel better, too. Working up a good sweat makes everything seem better.” Lee managed to find one of his inspiring smiles, even as Gaara stared at him.
“You're serious.” Gaara moved closer, the sand hissing around his feet and lapping up at Lee's legs. “You came out here to tell me to hit things.”
“It really does help.”
“And what if I want to hit you?”
Lee forced himself to keep steady eye contact and not flinch when the sand tightened like a vice around his ankle. “If that's what you want, but I'm going to make it hard for you.”
Gaara grabbed the front of Lee's vest and yanked him down so that they were nose to nose. “And what makes you think that I'm going to give you the chance? Who says that I'm not going to kill you right now? You are in my territory now, Lee. I could crush the life out of you with a thought.”
“I know you, Gaara. You won't kill me. You don't hate me.”
“Hate is the only emotion I know.”
Lee shook his head. “You're wrong.”
“Are you sure?” The sand crawled up Lee's body, looping and twisting its way around. The pressure increased, making a deep breath impossible.
“I trust you, Gaara.”
“Then you're a fool.”
“I might be a fool, but not because I trust you.”
The sand constricted around him, slowly crushing the air from his lungs. The grains dragged across his clothes, cutting through them and the skin underneath. It was even more agonizing when it was slow, and he could tell exactly what was happening. The jade eyes just stared at Lee from only a few inches away as he struggled to get any air into his lungs. Blood was running over his hand, he could feel it, and he was starting to get dizzy. Still, he did not fight. `I trust you, Gaara.'
Gaara watched his prey, studying his expression for something. Behind him, the miniature sand storm escalated, actually cracking the cliff in its rage. Lee knew he was in trouble when his vision started to grey out. `He won't do it. He doesn't want to kill me.' His head drooped forward.
The sand collapsed, dropping Lee to the ground. The storm smashed into the cliff a final time before falling back to the desert as well, suddenly harmless. The Kazekage stepped back, his hands clutching at his own arms. “This is your fault.”
Lee was still working on convincing his body that it was free to breathe again, and had no extra brain power to use. “Huh?”
“You were gone. I was expecting to see you, and you weren't there. For two weeks. It was . . . I didn't like it.”
Lee ran a tentative hand over his chest. He was pretty sure he had at least one cracked rib. It didn't feel like anything was poking him, so it could wait. “Oh, the mission. You did send me on it . . . “
“But when I wanted to see you, you were not here.”
“Gaara, that's called missing someone.”
“Missing.” The jade eyes blinked as Gaara's hands tightened around his own arms. “The restless, anxious, angry feeling was because I missed you? Why?”
“I guess you're getting used to me.” Lee shrugged as he pushed himself up, a bit mystified himself. “Usually, it means that you want them around. You want to see them.”
The green eyes squeezed shut. Gaara's mouth was moving, but Lee could not make out most of what was being said. The Kazekage suddenly shook his head violently. “Shut up. All of you. I'll decide.”
`That's not good.' The bandages that were supposed to protect his forearms were in ruins, along with large patches of the green spandex jumpsuit. Blood was running down Lee's arms and legs, dripping into the sand that still seemed to be watching him. He was at a loss on what to do next. “So, um, how are you doing now?”
Gaara looked at him with a slightly crazed expression, and Lee had to fight the urge to hit himself in the head again.
“Never mind. Forget I said that. What do you want to do now? Do you want to go back? I think Temari and Kankuro are worried about you.”
“No.” The Kazekage's hand clutched as his chest. “The delegation from Grass is still there. But I don't want to be out here, either. It's too quiet, and I can only hear them . . . ” One hand trailed up to grasp at a temple.
Lee slowly climbed to his feet, his steps uneven. Gaara was turning in on himself, his hand fisting in his hair, and he had started to rock again. Lee closed the distance between them and reached out to set a hand on his friend's shoulder. “I'll stay here with you. You don't have to be by yourself with them.”
Gaara flinched, but did not yank away.
“Do you want that, Gaara? Do you want me to stay?”
Slowly, the Kazekage nodded.
----
Lee folded his vest in half before tucking it beneath his head like a pillow. There was only a sliver of the moon that night, providing little light in the desert. Overhead was a spectacle that boggled the mind of the life-long resident of Konoha. Miles away from the nearest light bulb, there was no light to interfere with the stars blazing across the sky. With no clouds or trees to interfere, Lee was settling in to enjoy the spectacle as shooting stars raced through the night. There was no sound or movement in the endless sand. As far as he could tell, they were the only living things in the entire world.
With the faint light of the moon, Lee could just barely make out the silhouette of his friend. Gaara was leaning back on his hands, his head tipped back to watch the night sky. Calm had returned to the desert. The taijutsu master looked at his arm, dragging a hand over the strip of black material that had been used to bind his latest injuries. Gaara had sacrificed parts of his shirt so that Lee could be bandaged up. `It was kind of sweet. Once he quit watching my blood drip into the sand. That part was not exactly youthful.'
“I've never done this before.”
A shooting star streaked across the heavens, making Lee smile. “Why not?”
“I just never did.” Gaara turned to look at the reclining shinobi. His eyes were sane again, the voices and inner demons firmly locked away.
Lee almost missed the uncertain look before the Kazekage shrugged off his gourd and set it aside. The sand shifted a bit, forming a lump right next to Lee's head. Without another word, Gaara settled down next to his friend, close enough that their shoulders brushed against each other. In silence, they continued to watch the stars.
“You were right.”
“Hm?” Lee blinked slowly and glanced over at the red head. It had been a long mission, and an even longer day spent in the desert while Gaara fought with his own mind. He was having trouble staying awake.
“I missed you. When you left, it didn't feel right. Now it does.”
“I missed you, too, Gaara.”
Gaara sat up on his elbow, turning to study his Lee's face. “You felt that? That restless, frustrated feeling?”
“Well, yes.” Lee scratched at the back of his neck and hoped that his blush wasn't visible in the dark.
“What did you miss?”
“Uh, well, I missed sparring with you, of course. You are a talented and youthful opponent! And having lunch with you in your office, even if we have to hurry. I even missed watching you make your coffee in the morning.” Lee chuckled. “You only fill the cup halfway, so you have enough room for the cream and sugar. I guess I missed all of you.”
“I missed the sparring. I also missed watching you mess with my ANBU guards.” Gaara's voice dropped to a whisper. “I missed the touching.”
Lee's head popped up. “What?”
“Touching.” The dark rimmed eyes watched him so intently. “Only Kankuro and Temari ever touch me, and they do it rarely. You are the only one that touches me because you want to.”
“You . . . you don't mind?”
Slowly, Gaara's hand came up to rest on Lee's forearm. “It's strange. I don't know what to do with it. But I want it. I don't know why, but I want it.”
`Oh, boy.' Heart pounding, Lee propped himself up on his less injured arm.
“I don't understand any of this.” Gaara leaned forward, now close enough that his breath fanned across Lee's face.
“It's okay. Emotions are tricky that way.”
“Emotions.” The hand resting on Lee's arm tightened. “But what am I supposed to do about it if I don't understand it?”
“You're supposed to listen to your emotions, even if your head can't figure it out.”
Gaara's eyes shut as he closed the last inches between them. His lips slid over Lee's, this time soft and inviting, while both arms pulled the jounin closer. Any protest that might have been made died the second Gaara pulled him close. `I really should follow my own advice.'