Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ quixotism ❯ chapter 9 ( Chapter 9 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: littleolmee 
sasuke's feelings. Warning chapter has NOT been betaed.
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Shounen / Romance / Hentai | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 07.15.2006 | Updated On: 10.02.2006 | Pages: 2 | Words: 4.7K | Visits: 715 | Status: Work In Progress
sasuke's feelings. Warning chapter has NOT been betaed.
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Shounen / Romance / Hentai | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 07.15.2006 | Updated On: 10.02.2006 | Pages: 2 | Words: 4.7K | Visits: 715 | Status: Work In Progress
Blanket disclaimer: I do not claim any rights to Naruto or any characters associated with the anime/manga. They are the property of Masashi Kishimoto. I do claim rights to any and all original characters that might appear in this story.
A/N: There will be cursing, adult situations including slash pairing (boyXboy) and hentai (boyXgirl). If you are offended by such things, not of age to be reading such material, or are not wanting to read spoilers than please push the back button now.
ADDITIONAL WARNING: There will be talk of slash pairing in this chapter; some interaction between (Kak/Iru) nothing explicit but, it will be touched on.
'thinking'
"talking"
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Arriving home from his friend’s apartment Sasuke marched himself upstairs to his room. Having been throwing by the sight of Naruto in the tub, he didn't even take the time to remove his shoes at the front door. Sliding open the bedroom door with more force then necessary Sasuke began to take off his clothes violently throwing them around the room frustrated at his reaction to his best friend. Pulling out a pair of pajamas he shoved off his boxers shocked to find himself still partially hard from the experience.
Staring down at his body Sasuke frowned furrowing his eyebrows together. This was not a reaction he normally had toward others. Not that Uchiha Sasuke was one to go around trying to catch people naked but, he did go to the public bath house, the same as anyone else, he didn't recall having had such a reaction before. 'Not that people at the public bath usually positioned themselves in such erotic ways while bathing.' His mind supplied to him along with the vision of his friend now etched in his memory, no what distressed him was the shiver of lewdness he felt at the memory of his best friend in the tub.
It wasn't that he was bothered by the idea of same sex relationships, it wasn't something that was looked down upon. In fact there were many couples in Konoha and Sasuke figured that it was the same in other ninja villages as well. Sometimes ninjas would have same sex partners until they rose in rank enough to take jobs that mainly kept them around the village, then would go on to take a spouse of the opposite sex to start a family. While others stayed exclusively to one sex or the other.
Sitting on the side of his bed after he had finished dressing for the night it struck Sasuke funny how many ninjas did have same sex relations, it was just another accepted part of a shinobi's life. 'It must be the closeness we share. Hard not to feel strongly toward ones comrades when your life regularly depends on them. Plus the men outnumber kunoichis two to one. With odds like that of course there are relations between the men.'
Leaning his elbows on his knees Sasuke clasped his hands together and leaned his forehead on his hands. "I guess this explains why I could never stand any of the women I tried dating." Sasuke said to the empty room, receiving no answer he huffed to himself. He knew most of the female and older folks in the village would not be happy about the idea of him entering such a relationship. They wouldn’t view the idea negatively but, because he was the last Uchiha, it would mean the clan would end with him. Though the thought of being without an heir to his clan strangely did not bother him as much as he thought it would.
Thinking about the parts of his life he did remember Sasuke knew up to this point he hadn't been living according to his own wants. Before his clan was wiped out, Sasuke’s goals had been to make his family proud of his accomplishments as a shinobi. Of course he wanted to be the best he could but, his driving force had been to bring honor to his family. All in hopes it would cause his father to acknowledge him as his son. After Itachi killed their family he lived to better himself, so some day he could kill his own brother. If he was honest, he also wanted his brother to recognize him even if it was by dying by his hands.
He came to realize after he accepted the fact that Itachi had been defeated by Naruto that his brother's death did nothing to ease the loss he still felt. He didn't think even if he had been the one to end Itachi's life that he would have given him peace. All his life had been about doing what he felt he had to do for those Itachi had killed. Hell, even the part of his life he couldn't remember had been about gaining power in order to full fill his duty to his clan.
Sasuke sighed none of his 18-years of life had been for himself, he hadn't been bothered by it until now. "I have as much right as anyone to have my moments of selfishness, don't I?" He asked his empty bedroom. "Revenge is no longer part of my life. Am I not allowed my own life now?"
His thoughts turned to Naruto and the effect he had in his life. He had to admit no one else so far in his life had made him experience the range of emotions that he did. 'The dobe always did push me.' He thought smiling at how Naruto naturally made others feel more then even they wanted too, his friend always pushed people beyond what they felt were their limits.
He could tolerate being around others but, before Naruto had returned life just didn't make sense to him. 'When I'm with him, I'm not confused.' Reaching up he touched the spot on his neck where he remembered Orochimaru bit. 'It's like all those years never happened. I don't have to be ashamed around him.' Sasuke smiled thinking how only this loudmouth could give him the support he needed.
Moving to lie back in bed Sasuke knew there was no one else he wanted with him, even in that capacity it was Naruto he wanted by his side. Looking back at the past weeks, they had shared Sasuke thought of the time they'd spent together and the sensations he had felt when with Naurto. The smiles given to him, that time when they had both been reaching for the same piece of trash and ended up grabbing onto the other's hand. Smirking Sasuke thought about how Naruto had pulled his hand back and blushed so deeply when he teasingly asked if Naruto was trying to hold his hand. He could feel those memories working to unfold the passion he had been keeping lock inside. "These feelings aren't new . . . I've felt them before, always with Naruto. I guess I just ignored them till Naruto made it impossible for me to ignore." Folding his hands behind his head, he commented. "Just like Naruto, even when he has no idea what's going on he won't let anyone not acknowledge him."
The years he was able to remembered Sasuke realized even back then Naruto had been special to him; after all it was Naruto that Sasuke had offered up his own life to protect back when they had fought against Haku in Wave Country. It probably wasn't right to say but, he didn't think he would have thrown himself in front of just anyone. Certainly he would have tried to help any team mate but, only Naruto could make him act without thought.
Examining the flood of things he was feeling Sasuke knew Naruto had always held a different spot in his heart than others had, simply he felt drawn to him. When they had first became teammates those feelings had started when he saw a similarity between himself and Naruto. Back then he had no way to know what he was feeling for the small blonde, he had only been a 12-year-old boy. Now he was a 18-year-old man who understood his feelings better, Sasuke knew he viewed Naruto as his most precious person. The lust he had felt when he saw, his friend in the tub hadn't been awakened by anyone else. Not even the girls he had dated and even made out with, none had affected him like this. "Who knows what would have happened between us before now if I hadn't been missing."
Gazing up Sasuke drew little designs with his mind on the textured ceiling. Now that he had recognized how he felt it only made sense to act on those feelings. He was an Uchiha after all and his people were not ones to sit around, they saw what they wanted and moved forward. The only problem was he wasn't sure how to move forward and would Naruto share such feelings, if not what would that mean for their friendship? That was the only thing that really held him back, he couldn't bare to loose Naruto as his friend and admitting he was attracted to him could cause problems if Naruto didn't return his feelings.
It was true since they had regained their friendship they had not acted as childish as they did before. They did spend most of their time together doing not only shinobi duties and training but, even running errands and eating most meals together. Sasuke left more comfortable making connection with others this time, unlike before when his life was about gaining strength to kill Itachi.
Before he didn't feel, he could afford such connections; afraid Itachi would return and kill those he valued once again. Fear still settled on his heart when he thought of his murderous brother. The idea that Itachi would return and take away what he held special, set him on edge. Taking a deep breath he worked on calming hismself. 'It's not like what I remember, things are different this time.' He assured himself settling back down on the bed. 'Itachi is gone, I'm free to lead my life how I want, without fear of that thief stealing what I hold as priceless.' Sasuke snorted at his actions assuring himself that things were fine. Blinking his eyes Sasuke drifted off to sleep hoping the morning would hold some answers for him.
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Excited about the possibilities of what could be between them, Sasuke awoke early that morning. Instead of trying to sleep any longer he got up and went about his normal routine, finally setting down to eat some breakfast he began to contemplate how to make Naruto aware of his interest. That was all he needed to be concerned with at this moment, figuring out how to act toward Naruto in order to make his feelings known. With the girls he dated, they made the intent known. Having to be the one in charge of making things proceed was a daunting task to be faced with.
Taking a sip of milk, he tried to recall how couples acted together in public. The girls he had dated had made outright spectaculars out of themselves. He knew he would never act in such a way nor could he deal with Naruto acting in a similar fashion. Naruto did at time show public affection but, he doubted Naruto would make him feel as uncomfortable as the girls had. Sasuke smiled at his thoughts and admitted that sometimes Naruto did make the receiver of his affections uncomfortable at times, at least when he ended up squeezing the stuffings out of people.
Having finished with breakfast Sasuke pulled on his shoes he had brought down earlier deciding the best thing to do was to gather some more information on the subject. It was still early and many couples walked to work together or went out for breakfast, especially shinobis. Making up his mind, Sasuke headed toward the area of the village that had the most shops in hope he could get some ideas from watching other couples how to deal with Naruto.
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Sighing Sasuke leaned against the wall of a store, in the heart of the business district of the village. Crossing his arms over his chest he hoped his posture would keep people away from him, all he wanted was to do some people watching. So far he wasn't having much luck, several people had bothered him as far. If not young women or their mothers trying to set him up on dates it was older men asking how he was doing. So far he hadn't been able to get any real information on couples. The shinobi couples he saw that were not married usually just acted like close friends. The civilian villagers seemed to be in one of two type groups; younger unmarried couples hung off one another and the older married couples seemed to argue a lot.
Squinting his eyes Sasuke noticed two people he recognized coming through the crowd together. Walking side by side was Iruka-sensei and Kakashi-sensei. Sasuke watched as his current sensei gave his past sensei a smile through his mask and seemed to be saying something to him. Whatever he said must have been interesting, if the look and blush on his past sensei's face were any indication. Watching the two carefully, Sasuke could see they walked close together barely touching but, still there was a slight brush of their hands as they walked. Kakashi often leaned over to speak quietly to the shorter man, who answered just as quietly.
Sasuke wondered if blushing, like Iurka was doing, could lead to health problems. The concentration of blood in one area for too long couldn't be good. 'They’re an unlikely couple, I must admit they do seem good together. I'll start with them.' Sasuke figured they were the best couple he had seen so far this morning to study. They were both talented ninjas in their own way though Kakashi certainly outclassed Iruka in power and rank but, it didn't seem to bother either one.
The way they carried on in public didn't really scream they were a couple, not like the young villagers who hung off of one another but, they weren't as indifferent as most the other shinobi couples he had witnessed. Unless you really watched them closely, you would miss it since it was so subtle. Since this was what Sasuke was looking for it now seemed so obvious but, it was a discreet type of obvious. 'This is the type of expressions of relationship I could handle in public, they show each other they care more then friends with their actions while still remembering they are ninjas.' Staying a prudent distance from the couple, Sasuke followed them gathering as much information as he could from them.
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After having given their orders for breakfast Iruka had the overwhelming sensation that someone was watching them. Taking a drink, he tried discreetly to duck his head so to look around him. Across from Iruka casually Kakashi folded his hands together resting his chin on them as he watched him with interest. "Ah. . .Iruka, what are you doing?" Jerking back to his companion Iruka put his cup down and leaned over hiding his mouth with one hand. "Don't you feel it? Someone is watching us."
Lazily Kakashi nodded. "Hmm . . . I see, well being we are in a public restaurant I'm sure there are many who have the chance." Blushing while he shook his head Iruka explained. "No, no not just normal looking at someone. I feel like someone is watching us." He emphasized pulling back his eye lids staring hard at his boyfriend. Kakashi chuckled at Iruka's actions, the man was always such good entertainment.
Kakashi had felt someone’s gaze on them as well but, as long as they weren't meaning any harm he had planned on ignoring them. Since it bothered Iruka so badly Kakashi casting his lazy gaze around the room to find who was scrutinizing them enough to bother Iruka. Surprised when his gaze landed on his student, Kakashi drooped his eye and watched as Sasuke peeked out from behind his menu toward them. Smirking under his mask he waited till Sasuke hid behind his menu again before excusing himself from a very confused Iruka to slide up next to his student.
Feeling someone's presents at his table Sasuke lowered his menu only to jerk back when it was his sensei's face staring at him from right behind his menu. "Kakashi-sensei . . . what are you doing?" Crinkling his visible eye in amusement Kakashi took hold of Sasuke's hand and pulled him out of his seat and over to his table where Iruka was still seated watching them confused. Pushing the boy into an empty seat between his lover and himself before he could argue Kakashi retook his seat and refolded his hands still smiling.
"So . . . what brings you here this fine morning Sasuke?" Sifting his glance between the two senseis Sasuke tried to remain unemotional about it. "The same as you." Nodding Kakashi said, "I see you’re here to eat breakfast with your boyfriend then." Unable to look either man in the face Sasuke looked down at the table with wide eyes. If he did look up, he believed Iruka-sensei probably was wearing a rather amusing look on his face if you went by the chocking sound he heard him make.
"Kakashi stop teasing him. Was there anything you needed Sasuke?" Iruka asked going straight into teacher mode. 'May the Kami's bless you, Iruka-sensei.' Thanking any deity, he could think of for the kind teacher taking pity on him Sasuke felt more at easy about looking at them now. "I was interested in how you two acted together as a couple." Sasuke replied honestly, shocked at his own straight forwardness. 'I can't believe I said that.'
Kakashi gave him a rather perverted look as he cleared his throat. "I'm glad you came to me to ask Sasuke." The silver-haired shinobi answered holding up one finger. "Now while I could give you a detailed account of my love life I personally feel self discovery is very important so let me suggest a few books that could give you some ideas on how to continue." Kakashi was interrupted thankfully by Iruka once again chocking and Sasuke seen he's assumption that the brunette teacher worn a rather amusing look when he was embarrassed was correct.
"Kakashi . . . I don't believe Sasuke was interested in that kind of information." Iruka sputtered a blush playing over his checks and nose highlighting the scar that ran horizontally across his nose. "Were you Sasuke?" Sasuke found himself thanking the Kamis for Iruka again. "I was more interested on how you two acted toward one another and how you came to acknowledge your feelings."
Nodding Iruka held out his hand to stop Kakashi from saying a word giving the masked ninja a stern look before returning his attention to Sasuke and softening his look. "You've found someone that you have developed feelings for?" Sasuke jerked his head down once. "Well . . . just going out of your way to be pleasant toward them is good. Inviting them to eat with you and spend time doing things friends do is a good way to judge if that person feels the same." Iruka suggested folding his arms on top of the table leaning forward. "If you don't know for sure if they are interested in more than making sure you develop a strong friendship is always best so you can approach the situation more comfortably. When you have a strong base relationship building from there is easier, you know they say friends make the best . . . well lovers." The soft spoke Chuunin said, looking a little worried about having said the word lovers to an ex-student.
Watching the differences between the two teachers Sasuke wondered how two so seemingly opposite people carried on a relationship. Before he could think about it too long, Kakashi interrupted. Rolling one of his hands as if to move the conversation along Kakashi added. "When you got the friends' thing down, I found pushing them up against a wall and nibbling their neck a good way to show your true feelings." Kakashi explained smiling the whole time. "Especially if they are a little slow on the up take."
At Iruka's sudden silence and extreme color change Sasuke figured that must have been Kakashi's technique he used on him. "Does it work?" Sasuke heard himself ask as Kakashi rubbed his chin through his mask. "Mmm . . . " Using the same hand he had been rubbing his chin with to wave at Sasuke in a cautioning motion Kakashi warned, "just be prepared to duck and cover, especially if the person is a trained ninja." He replied as he received a napkin in his face, which he did nothing to dodge. "It also helps to know how experienced the person is your dealing with." Kakashi added ignoring Sasuke in favor of giving Iruka a strange look.
Nodding Sasuke stood and thanked both senseis for their help and left them to enjoy their meal. He stopped when he heard Iruka calling him back. Staying in his seat Iruka motioned for him to come closer. Sasuke bowed to lean in closer to hear what the Chuunin had to say, Iruka smiled warmly to Sasuke as he advised him. "I just wanted to say for you not to hurt Naruto if you initiate this Sasuke or I'm afraid I might have to have a talk with you." He explained cracking his knuckles menacingly at him, nodding to the teacher Sasuke excused himself.
'When the hell did Iruka-sensei get so scarey?' He wondered as he left the restaurant. 'They were the best example of a couple I could find and they did give me a lot of information. If I go by what they said we already have the friendship part down so that's not an issue. That leaves how to show him how I feel. I wonder how experienced he is? He was gone with Jiraiya for well over four years of his life and that man is an even bigger pervert then Kakashi. Surely Naruto has had some experience. Girls have been giving him attention since he came back and even some guys but, Naruto doesn't seem to pick up on any of it; he's completely uninterested in that sort of thing.' Sasuke thought walking away from the shops toward the one place, he was most likely to find the Sennin. 'Maybe I should go ask Jiraiya about it.'
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"Hmm . . . ." Jiraiya rubbed his chin as he contemplated Sasuke's question, sighing he looked skyward for some sign that would help. He knew the Naruto had been very honest about the merger to his friends and that they all accepted him back with very few questions on the issue. The council felt it was better to have him within the village than him wandering around or him becoming a welcomed member of the Sand Village. 'Tsunade-hime and I still make a good team.' He amusingly thought.
Jiraiya sighed rotating his head to pop his neck before he spoke. "You understand about the merger Naruto has went through?" Jiraiya asked making a motion for the young man to take a seat on the ground a cross from him. Sasuke nodded to the Sennin's question as he sat.
Scratching his head Jiraiya wondered if Naruto would really be interested in someone who spoke so little but, he wasn't going to interfere. "Naruto had sixteen years to grow as a normal boy until he merged. I do remember when we would stay in one spot for training, he would comment that some girl that showed interest in him was cute. The boy even admitted that some boys he saw were also cute but, beyond simple childish crushes he doesn't seem to get it." Jiraiya admitted shrugging his shoulders at the Uchiha heir.
When all the dark-haired boy did was frown Jiraiya continued. "You remember Naruto when he was young, he has always been smaller then the rest of you boys." Sasuke snorted at the hermit's comment giving him a smirk. It was well known that Naruto had been upset growing up that he was smaller than the rest of the guys and it seemed time had not been kind to him in the height department still. While it was true, he had gotten taller then he had been when he was 12, he was still clearly shorter then the rest of the guys.
Clearing his throat Jiraiya continued. "From what I understand part of Naruto's childish innocents and appearance comes from the fact he is simply a late bloomer and before . . . " Jiraiya trailed off rubbing the back of his neck looking for the right words. "Well . . . before he could bloom, I guess, the merger was complete. Youkai's live basically forever so they don't get into the whole interested in that stage till later in life." Jiraiya explained, rolling his hand. "Hn." Sasuke answered crossing his arms over his chest.
'So he doesn't seem interested and doesn't notice the attention of others because of the merger.' Sasuke figured quickly, he was considered a genius after all. 'Naruto might be almost 18 years-old but, mentally he still just a kid. In other words he has physically but, not mentally reach puberty yet.' Sasuke's thoughts were interrupted when Jiraiya began talking again.
"Don't think that means the boy wouldn't be interested in some kind of relationship. He physically is old enough to, it's just a matter of if he mentally would want to." The older man explained confirming Sasuke's hunch. "He was always training and it's not like we stayed any place for long anyway. So he didn't have time to set down any kind of relationships." Jiraiya urged smiling. 'Stick this in your ideas for the boy. You, stupid foxes.'
Sasuke nodded to the frog Sennin as he stood to leave. "Thanks for the information, I'll keep it in mind." Laughing at his chance to knock the two fox retainers plans for Naruto off Jiraiya waved. "Any time my boy, if you need any pointer or more information don't hesitate to ask." Sasuke left with his mind full and the sounds of Jiraiya belly laughing in his ears.
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shinobi: another name for ninja
sensei: teacher
Chuunin: after at least 8 missions Genins can be nominated by their Jounin sensei to participate in the Chuunin selection exam.
Jounin: level after Chuunin, elite ninja.
Sennin: A wandering hermit or wiseman. These individuals have decided to wander outside the boundaries of their respective villages for their own personal reasons. Many retain their village affiliation, so are not considered missing nins. People who obtain this unofficial title are very skilled in various jutsus and have a strength comparable to that of the Kage of a village.
kitsune: fox
Sennin: A wandering hermit or wiseman.
hime: princess, young lady of noble birth
Godaime: 5th Hokage
A/N: There will be cursing, adult situations including slash pairing (boyXboy) and hentai (boyXgirl). If you are offended by such things, not of age to be reading such material, or are not wanting to read spoilers than please push the back button now.
ADDITIONAL WARNING: There will be talk of slash pairing in this chapter; some interaction between (Kak/Iru) nothing explicit but, it will be touched on.
'thinking'
"talking"
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Arriving home from his friend’s apartment Sasuke marched himself upstairs to his room. Having been throwing by the sight of Naruto in the tub, he didn't even take the time to remove his shoes at the front door. Sliding open the bedroom door with more force then necessary Sasuke began to take off his clothes violently throwing them around the room frustrated at his reaction to his best friend. Pulling out a pair of pajamas he shoved off his boxers shocked to find himself still partially hard from the experience.
Staring down at his body Sasuke frowned furrowing his eyebrows together. This was not a reaction he normally had toward others. Not that Uchiha Sasuke was one to go around trying to catch people naked but, he did go to the public bath house, the same as anyone else, he didn't recall having had such a reaction before. 'Not that people at the public bath usually positioned themselves in such erotic ways while bathing.' His mind supplied to him along with the vision of his friend now etched in his memory, no what distressed him was the shiver of lewdness he felt at the memory of his best friend in the tub.
It wasn't that he was bothered by the idea of same sex relationships, it wasn't something that was looked down upon. In fact there were many couples in Konoha and Sasuke figured that it was the same in other ninja villages as well. Sometimes ninjas would have same sex partners until they rose in rank enough to take jobs that mainly kept them around the village, then would go on to take a spouse of the opposite sex to start a family. While others stayed exclusively to one sex or the other.
Sitting on the side of his bed after he had finished dressing for the night it struck Sasuke funny how many ninjas did have same sex relations, it was just another accepted part of a shinobi's life. 'It must be the closeness we share. Hard not to feel strongly toward ones comrades when your life regularly depends on them. Plus the men outnumber kunoichis two to one. With odds like that of course there are relations between the men.'
Leaning his elbows on his knees Sasuke clasped his hands together and leaned his forehead on his hands. "I guess this explains why I could never stand any of the women I tried dating." Sasuke said to the empty room, receiving no answer he huffed to himself. He knew most of the female and older folks in the village would not be happy about the idea of him entering such a relationship. They wouldn’t view the idea negatively but, because he was the last Uchiha, it would mean the clan would end with him. Though the thought of being without an heir to his clan strangely did not bother him as much as he thought it would.
Thinking about the parts of his life he did remember Sasuke knew up to this point he hadn't been living according to his own wants. Before his clan was wiped out, Sasuke’s goals had been to make his family proud of his accomplishments as a shinobi. Of course he wanted to be the best he could but, his driving force had been to bring honor to his family. All in hopes it would cause his father to acknowledge him as his son. After Itachi killed their family he lived to better himself, so some day he could kill his own brother. If he was honest, he also wanted his brother to recognize him even if it was by dying by his hands.
He came to realize after he accepted the fact that Itachi had been defeated by Naruto that his brother's death did nothing to ease the loss he still felt. He didn't think even if he had been the one to end Itachi's life that he would have given him peace. All his life had been about doing what he felt he had to do for those Itachi had killed. Hell, even the part of his life he couldn't remember had been about gaining power in order to full fill his duty to his clan.
Sasuke sighed none of his 18-years of life had been for himself, he hadn't been bothered by it until now. "I have as much right as anyone to have my moments of selfishness, don't I?" He asked his empty bedroom. "Revenge is no longer part of my life. Am I not allowed my own life now?"
His thoughts turned to Naruto and the effect he had in his life. He had to admit no one else so far in his life had made him experience the range of emotions that he did. 'The dobe always did push me.' He thought smiling at how Naruto naturally made others feel more then even they wanted too, his friend always pushed people beyond what they felt were their limits.
He could tolerate being around others but, before Naruto had returned life just didn't make sense to him. 'When I'm with him, I'm not confused.' Reaching up he touched the spot on his neck where he remembered Orochimaru bit. 'It's like all those years never happened. I don't have to be ashamed around him.' Sasuke smiled thinking how only this loudmouth could give him the support he needed.
Moving to lie back in bed Sasuke knew there was no one else he wanted with him, even in that capacity it was Naruto he wanted by his side. Looking back at the past weeks, they had shared Sasuke thought of the time they'd spent together and the sensations he had felt when with Naurto. The smiles given to him, that time when they had both been reaching for the same piece of trash and ended up grabbing onto the other's hand. Smirking Sasuke thought about how Naruto had pulled his hand back and blushed so deeply when he teasingly asked if Naruto was trying to hold his hand. He could feel those memories working to unfold the passion he had been keeping lock inside. "These feelings aren't new . . . I've felt them before, always with Naruto. I guess I just ignored them till Naruto made it impossible for me to ignore." Folding his hands behind his head, he commented. "Just like Naruto, even when he has no idea what's going on he won't let anyone not acknowledge him."
The years he was able to remembered Sasuke realized even back then Naruto had been special to him; after all it was Naruto that Sasuke had offered up his own life to protect back when they had fought against Haku in Wave Country. It probably wasn't right to say but, he didn't think he would have thrown himself in front of just anyone. Certainly he would have tried to help any team mate but, only Naruto could make him act without thought.
Examining the flood of things he was feeling Sasuke knew Naruto had always held a different spot in his heart than others had, simply he felt drawn to him. When they had first became teammates those feelings had started when he saw a similarity between himself and Naruto. Back then he had no way to know what he was feeling for the small blonde, he had only been a 12-year-old boy. Now he was a 18-year-old man who understood his feelings better, Sasuke knew he viewed Naruto as his most precious person. The lust he had felt when he saw, his friend in the tub hadn't been awakened by anyone else. Not even the girls he had dated and even made out with, none had affected him like this. "Who knows what would have happened between us before now if I hadn't been missing."
Gazing up Sasuke drew little designs with his mind on the textured ceiling. Now that he had recognized how he felt it only made sense to act on those feelings. He was an Uchiha after all and his people were not ones to sit around, they saw what they wanted and moved forward. The only problem was he wasn't sure how to move forward and would Naruto share such feelings, if not what would that mean for their friendship? That was the only thing that really held him back, he couldn't bare to loose Naruto as his friend and admitting he was attracted to him could cause problems if Naruto didn't return his feelings.
It was true since they had regained their friendship they had not acted as childish as they did before. They did spend most of their time together doing not only shinobi duties and training but, even running errands and eating most meals together. Sasuke left more comfortable making connection with others this time, unlike before when his life was about gaining strength to kill Itachi.
Before he didn't feel, he could afford such connections; afraid Itachi would return and kill those he valued once again. Fear still settled on his heart when he thought of his murderous brother. The idea that Itachi would return and take away what he held special, set him on edge. Taking a deep breath he worked on calming hismself. 'It's not like what I remember, things are different this time.' He assured himself settling back down on the bed. 'Itachi is gone, I'm free to lead my life how I want, without fear of that thief stealing what I hold as priceless.' Sasuke snorted at his actions assuring himself that things were fine. Blinking his eyes Sasuke drifted off to sleep hoping the morning would hold some answers for him.
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Excited about the possibilities of what could be between them, Sasuke awoke early that morning. Instead of trying to sleep any longer he got up and went about his normal routine, finally setting down to eat some breakfast he began to contemplate how to make Naruto aware of his interest. That was all he needed to be concerned with at this moment, figuring out how to act toward Naruto in order to make his feelings known. With the girls he dated, they made the intent known. Having to be the one in charge of making things proceed was a daunting task to be faced with.
Taking a sip of milk, he tried to recall how couples acted together in public. The girls he had dated had made outright spectaculars out of themselves. He knew he would never act in such a way nor could he deal with Naruto acting in a similar fashion. Naruto did at time show public affection but, he doubted Naruto would make him feel as uncomfortable as the girls had. Sasuke smiled at his thoughts and admitted that sometimes Naruto did make the receiver of his affections uncomfortable at times, at least when he ended up squeezing the stuffings out of people.
Having finished with breakfast Sasuke pulled on his shoes he had brought down earlier deciding the best thing to do was to gather some more information on the subject. It was still early and many couples walked to work together or went out for breakfast, especially shinobis. Making up his mind, Sasuke headed toward the area of the village that had the most shops in hope he could get some ideas from watching other couples how to deal with Naruto.
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Sighing Sasuke leaned against the wall of a store, in the heart of the business district of the village. Crossing his arms over his chest he hoped his posture would keep people away from him, all he wanted was to do some people watching. So far he wasn't having much luck, several people had bothered him as far. If not young women or their mothers trying to set him up on dates it was older men asking how he was doing. So far he hadn't been able to get any real information on couples. The shinobi couples he saw that were not married usually just acted like close friends. The civilian villagers seemed to be in one of two type groups; younger unmarried couples hung off one another and the older married couples seemed to argue a lot.
Squinting his eyes Sasuke noticed two people he recognized coming through the crowd together. Walking side by side was Iruka-sensei and Kakashi-sensei. Sasuke watched as his current sensei gave his past sensei a smile through his mask and seemed to be saying something to him. Whatever he said must have been interesting, if the look and blush on his past sensei's face were any indication. Watching the two carefully, Sasuke could see they walked close together barely touching but, still there was a slight brush of their hands as they walked. Kakashi often leaned over to speak quietly to the shorter man, who answered just as quietly.
Sasuke wondered if blushing, like Iurka was doing, could lead to health problems. The concentration of blood in one area for too long couldn't be good. 'They’re an unlikely couple, I must admit they do seem good together. I'll start with them.' Sasuke figured they were the best couple he had seen so far this morning to study. They were both talented ninjas in their own way though Kakashi certainly outclassed Iruka in power and rank but, it didn't seem to bother either one.
The way they carried on in public didn't really scream they were a couple, not like the young villagers who hung off of one another but, they weren't as indifferent as most the other shinobi couples he had witnessed. Unless you really watched them closely, you would miss it since it was so subtle. Since this was what Sasuke was looking for it now seemed so obvious but, it was a discreet type of obvious. 'This is the type of expressions of relationship I could handle in public, they show each other they care more then friends with their actions while still remembering they are ninjas.' Staying a prudent distance from the couple, Sasuke followed them gathering as much information as he could from them.
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After having given their orders for breakfast Iruka had the overwhelming sensation that someone was watching them. Taking a drink, he tried discreetly to duck his head so to look around him. Across from Iruka casually Kakashi folded his hands together resting his chin on them as he watched him with interest. "Ah. . .Iruka, what are you doing?" Jerking back to his companion Iruka put his cup down and leaned over hiding his mouth with one hand. "Don't you feel it? Someone is watching us."
Lazily Kakashi nodded. "Hmm . . . I see, well being we are in a public restaurant I'm sure there are many who have the chance." Blushing while he shook his head Iruka explained. "No, no not just normal looking at someone. I feel like someone is watching us." He emphasized pulling back his eye lids staring hard at his boyfriend. Kakashi chuckled at Iruka's actions, the man was always such good entertainment.
Kakashi had felt someone’s gaze on them as well but, as long as they weren't meaning any harm he had planned on ignoring them. Since it bothered Iruka so badly Kakashi casting his lazy gaze around the room to find who was scrutinizing them enough to bother Iruka. Surprised when his gaze landed on his student, Kakashi drooped his eye and watched as Sasuke peeked out from behind his menu toward them. Smirking under his mask he waited till Sasuke hid behind his menu again before excusing himself from a very confused Iruka to slide up next to his student.
Feeling someone's presents at his table Sasuke lowered his menu only to jerk back when it was his sensei's face staring at him from right behind his menu. "Kakashi-sensei . . . what are you doing?" Crinkling his visible eye in amusement Kakashi took hold of Sasuke's hand and pulled him out of his seat and over to his table where Iruka was still seated watching them confused. Pushing the boy into an empty seat between his lover and himself before he could argue Kakashi retook his seat and refolded his hands still smiling.
"So . . . what brings you here this fine morning Sasuke?" Sifting his glance between the two senseis Sasuke tried to remain unemotional about it. "The same as you." Nodding Kakashi said, "I see you’re here to eat breakfast with your boyfriend then." Unable to look either man in the face Sasuke looked down at the table with wide eyes. If he did look up, he believed Iruka-sensei probably was wearing a rather amusing look on his face if you went by the chocking sound he heard him make.
"Kakashi stop teasing him. Was there anything you needed Sasuke?" Iruka asked going straight into teacher mode. 'May the Kami's bless you, Iruka-sensei.' Thanking any deity, he could think of for the kind teacher taking pity on him Sasuke felt more at easy about looking at them now. "I was interested in how you two acted together as a couple." Sasuke replied honestly, shocked at his own straight forwardness. 'I can't believe I said that.'
Kakashi gave him a rather perverted look as he cleared his throat. "I'm glad you came to me to ask Sasuke." The silver-haired shinobi answered holding up one finger. "Now while I could give you a detailed account of my love life I personally feel self discovery is very important so let me suggest a few books that could give you some ideas on how to continue." Kakashi was interrupted thankfully by Iruka once again chocking and Sasuke seen he's assumption that the brunette teacher worn a rather amusing look when he was embarrassed was correct.
"Kakashi . . . I don't believe Sasuke was interested in that kind of information." Iruka sputtered a blush playing over his checks and nose highlighting the scar that ran horizontally across his nose. "Were you Sasuke?" Sasuke found himself thanking the Kamis for Iruka again. "I was more interested on how you two acted toward one another and how you came to acknowledge your feelings."
Nodding Iruka held out his hand to stop Kakashi from saying a word giving the masked ninja a stern look before returning his attention to Sasuke and softening his look. "You've found someone that you have developed feelings for?" Sasuke jerked his head down once. "Well . . . just going out of your way to be pleasant toward them is good. Inviting them to eat with you and spend time doing things friends do is a good way to judge if that person feels the same." Iruka suggested folding his arms on top of the table leaning forward. "If you don't know for sure if they are interested in more than making sure you develop a strong friendship is always best so you can approach the situation more comfortably. When you have a strong base relationship building from there is easier, you know they say friends make the best . . . well lovers." The soft spoke Chuunin said, looking a little worried about having said the word lovers to an ex-student.
Watching the differences between the two teachers Sasuke wondered how two so seemingly opposite people carried on a relationship. Before he could think about it too long, Kakashi interrupted. Rolling one of his hands as if to move the conversation along Kakashi added. "When you got the friends' thing down, I found pushing them up against a wall and nibbling their neck a good way to show your true feelings." Kakashi explained smiling the whole time. "Especially if they are a little slow on the up take."
At Iruka's sudden silence and extreme color change Sasuke figured that must have been Kakashi's technique he used on him. "Does it work?" Sasuke heard himself ask as Kakashi rubbed his chin through his mask. "Mmm . . . " Using the same hand he had been rubbing his chin with to wave at Sasuke in a cautioning motion Kakashi warned, "just be prepared to duck and cover, especially if the person is a trained ninja." He replied as he received a napkin in his face, which he did nothing to dodge. "It also helps to know how experienced the person is your dealing with." Kakashi added ignoring Sasuke in favor of giving Iruka a strange look.
Nodding Sasuke stood and thanked both senseis for their help and left them to enjoy their meal. He stopped when he heard Iruka calling him back. Staying in his seat Iruka motioned for him to come closer. Sasuke bowed to lean in closer to hear what the Chuunin had to say, Iruka smiled warmly to Sasuke as he advised him. "I just wanted to say for you not to hurt Naruto if you initiate this Sasuke or I'm afraid I might have to have a talk with you." He explained cracking his knuckles menacingly at him, nodding to the teacher Sasuke excused himself.
'When the hell did Iruka-sensei get so scarey?' He wondered as he left the restaurant. 'They were the best example of a couple I could find and they did give me a lot of information. If I go by what they said we already have the friendship part down so that's not an issue. That leaves how to show him how I feel. I wonder how experienced he is? He was gone with Jiraiya for well over four years of his life and that man is an even bigger pervert then Kakashi. Surely Naruto has had some experience. Girls have been giving him attention since he came back and even some guys but, Naruto doesn't seem to pick up on any of it; he's completely uninterested in that sort of thing.' Sasuke thought walking away from the shops toward the one place, he was most likely to find the Sennin. 'Maybe I should go ask Jiraiya about it.'
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"Hmm . . . ." Jiraiya rubbed his chin as he contemplated Sasuke's question, sighing he looked skyward for some sign that would help. He knew the Naruto had been very honest about the merger to his friends and that they all accepted him back with very few questions on the issue. The council felt it was better to have him within the village than him wandering around or him becoming a welcomed member of the Sand Village. 'Tsunade-hime and I still make a good team.' He amusingly thought.
Jiraiya sighed rotating his head to pop his neck before he spoke. "You understand about the merger Naruto has went through?" Jiraiya asked making a motion for the young man to take a seat on the ground a cross from him. Sasuke nodded to the Sennin's question as he sat.
Scratching his head Jiraiya wondered if Naruto would really be interested in someone who spoke so little but, he wasn't going to interfere. "Naruto had sixteen years to grow as a normal boy until he merged. I do remember when we would stay in one spot for training, he would comment that some girl that showed interest in him was cute. The boy even admitted that some boys he saw were also cute but, beyond simple childish crushes he doesn't seem to get it." Jiraiya admitted shrugging his shoulders at the Uchiha heir.
When all the dark-haired boy did was frown Jiraiya continued. "You remember Naruto when he was young, he has always been smaller then the rest of you boys." Sasuke snorted at the hermit's comment giving him a smirk. It was well known that Naruto had been upset growing up that he was smaller than the rest of the guys and it seemed time had not been kind to him in the height department still. While it was true, he had gotten taller then he had been when he was 12, he was still clearly shorter then the rest of the guys.
Clearing his throat Jiraiya continued. "From what I understand part of Naruto's childish innocents and appearance comes from the fact he is simply a late bloomer and before . . . " Jiraiya trailed off rubbing the back of his neck looking for the right words. "Well . . . before he could bloom, I guess, the merger was complete. Youkai's live basically forever so they don't get into the whole interested in that stage till later in life." Jiraiya explained, rolling his hand. "Hn." Sasuke answered crossing his arms over his chest.
'So he doesn't seem interested and doesn't notice the attention of others because of the merger.' Sasuke figured quickly, he was considered a genius after all. 'Naruto might be almost 18 years-old but, mentally he still just a kid. In other words he has physically but, not mentally reach puberty yet.' Sasuke's thoughts were interrupted when Jiraiya began talking again.
"Don't think that means the boy wouldn't be interested in some kind of relationship. He physically is old enough to, it's just a matter of if he mentally would want to." The older man explained confirming Sasuke's hunch. "He was always training and it's not like we stayed any place for long anyway. So he didn't have time to set down any kind of relationships." Jiraiya urged smiling. 'Stick this in your ideas for the boy. You, stupid foxes.'
Sasuke nodded to the frog Sennin as he stood to leave. "Thanks for the information, I'll keep it in mind." Laughing at his chance to knock the two fox retainers plans for Naruto off Jiraiya waved. "Any time my boy, if you need any pointer or more information don't hesitate to ask." Sasuke left with his mind full and the sounds of Jiraiya belly laughing in his ears.
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shinobi: another name for ninja
sensei: teacher
Chuunin: after at least 8 missions Genins can be nominated by their Jounin sensei to participate in the Chuunin selection exam.
Jounin: level after Chuunin, elite ninja.
Sennin: A wandering hermit or wiseman. These individuals have decided to wander outside the boundaries of their respective villages for their own personal reasons. Many retain their village affiliation, so are not considered missing nins. People who obtain this unofficial title are very skilled in various jutsus and have a strength comparable to that of the Kage of a village.
kitsune: fox
Sennin: A wandering hermit or wiseman.
hime: princess, young lady of noble birth
Godaime: 5th Hokage