Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Shakespeare Lives ❯ Lamb to the Slaughter ( Chapter 4 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Author's Note: OO; WTF…::counts reviews:: Is that number right? Oh my…I'm so glad people are enjoying Shakespeare Lives…This was originally a really stupid idea, but…wow…Can't believe there is support. Anyway, GOMENNASAI MINNA-SAN! >< I couldn't do this for a while do to the huge amount of work in which I had. I'm also currently addicted to Bleach, so my Naruto inspiration just went out the window. But Jia's back! Anyways, hope you enjoy this chapter, and please, do review. The more reviews there are, the faster I work. And once again, thanks to my beta Miya for kicking my arse and plotting mutiny against me with Tsubasa-sama. ::cringe::

Pairings: None that I have as of yet. But who knows? Bugging me may get one…::shrugs::

Disclaimer: ::struggles in strait jacket:: You damn suit wearing freaks! How dare you lock me up in a strait jacket! I have already said that I don't own Naruto! >< Dammit! Why won't you people listen to me!?

Warning: Be prepared for possible OOCness, weird stuff, and the excessive murder of Mr. Shakespeare.

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Shakespeare Lives

By Jia Zhang

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Part IV : Lamb to the Slaughter

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Sakura looked out of her window nervously as she got dressed. The morning sun had just peeked over the mountain ranges, and smiled rather sleepily over Konoha. Today was the day when the long awaited cast of Konoha's production of Romeo and Juliet would be revealed. Sakura couldn't wait to find out the results. She had to know! Oh to get the chanced to play opposite of Sasuke…To act as his love interest…to get Sasuke to profess his love to you…to get to kiss Sasuke-kun…She squealed in delight.

Outer-Sakura thought of all the romantic scenes she would get to have with Sasuke…

Inner-Sakura was thinking up a way to…um…get him into bed...It does happen in the play, so why shouldn't it happen in real life? But hey, every other fangirl in Konoha was thinking of the same thing…Bondage was fun…

The pink haired kunoichi left her humble abode and towards the Ninja Academy. As she made her way through the streets, she noticed that she was not the only fangirl that was heading towards there. All the other females were just as excited to know who had gotten the part of Juliet. Sakura scowled a bit.

“Ohayo, big-forehead Sakura.”

Sakura turned to see Ino walking beside her. “Ohayo, Ino-pig. Off to find out that I will be play Juliet opposite of Sasuke-kun. Really, you shouldn't have.”

“Oh no, it will be me who's going to be playing Juliet.”

“No, me!”

“Me!”

“ME!”

The two girls glared at each other hatefully.

“You girls…che…” spoke Shikamaru, as he—with Chouji eating chips next to him—walked up to the two girls. “…You're so troublesome. Why don't you just let the Iruka-sensei, Tenten and Shino decide for you…After all, they are the ones making the list.”

“Shikamaru is right. The judges will decide fore us, Sakura…Then you'll see that it will be me who will get to kiss Sasuke-kun.”

“The only way you will get to play Juliet and be with my Sasuke-kun is if you bribed the judges

“Well…the only way you will get the part is if you slept with them.” The blonde smirk

“Take that back, pig!”

“Make me, forehead!”

“I'll be the one to play Juliet!”

“No, me!”

“Me!”

“ME!”

The two glared at each other, lighting crashing in the background.

Shikamaru groaned, smacking a hand to his forehead. “Those two sure are noisy,” said Chouji, munching on his chips.

“C'mon, let's just go…”

“It's be me!”

“NO, ME!”

Shikamaru and Chouji followed along with the massive platoon of people towards the Ninja Academy, where the results would soon be announced. Girls by the mountains were all giggling and squealing, praying that they would get the part of Juliet, and all the boys by the mountains wanted to drown themselves (since auditioning usually had not been their choice. They had been forced by the giggling and squealing fangirls).

But everybody was excited to find out about the cast. Gossip had been running wild around town as to who is going to play whom. From ninjas, to shopkeepers, to housewives, everyone wanted to know who played whom. Especially, who would be playing Juliet, opposite of the last remaining (loyal?) Uchiha, the one who didn't commit mass murder. And finally, after much waiting, the cast was going to be revealed.

Iruka stood on a small podium before the large horde of people. He sighed, wondering what would happen once he revealed the cast. To say the least, he was afraid…very afraid. It wasn't the fear Molder kept telling Scully to be afraid of…It wasn't the fear of Neo not being able to defeat the machines and save Zion…No, it was like the fear of Teletubies, Hamtaro, the evil purple dinosaur named Barney, and those Care Bears joining forces to take over the universe, spreading all their love, joy, fluffy pink crap…Oh what a wonderful world that would be…

Yep…It was that kind of fear…

“Anno…Ohayo minna-san. Shino-kun has finally completed the list of the cast. As you all know, Uchiha Sasuke,” insert fangirls screaming in glee (somewhere in the crowd Sasuke sweat-dropped), “will be playing the part of Romeo…As for Juliet…” The whole crowd sat on the edge of their seat as Iruka spoke. “Juliet will be played by…”

“CHOTTO MATTE!”

Everybody turned to see Tenten run up on to the stage, with Shino close behind her. “Just a sec…just a sec…” she spoke. She leaned over and whispered something in Iruka's ear. The chuunin looked at her curiously as Tenten smiled rather evilly, sending shudders down everyone's back. Iruka then whispered something to Shino, and the shinobi nodded. The whole of the crowd was on the edge of their seat.

Tenten turned around to face the crowd. A dark, evil, sly, yet pleasant smile lit her face. The crowd shuddered, cringing in fear. Sasuke, Naruto, Kiba, Neji, Shikamaru, Chouji, Sakura, Ino, Hinata, and all the rest felt an ominous cloud pass over them. Well, except for Lee…He was in…a…happy mood… Well, then again, he was constantly having a “gay ol' time”. No, not that type of “gay”. That would never happened in a gabillion years, and it would be extremely wrong if it did. That would destroy yaoi and shonen-ai as we know it.

But something was up. Something was not right. And bizarrely, Shino was going to let it happen.

“Ohayo minna-san!” Tenten smiled brightly. Everybody cringed. “Okie, this is how it's gonna work. I'm gonna call the role, the person's name, and then if you are called, your gonna go over there—” She pointed to the left. “Okie then! On with the casting!

Playing the role of Tybalt will be Hyuuga Neji-chan!”

“Neji-chan?” repeated everyone in union. Turning their eyes to the Hyuuga, whose vein was pulsing as if it was about to explode.

Murmurs run through the crowd. Sasuke, Naruto, Shikamaru, Chouji, Kiba and Akamaru, Ino, Sakura, and a shocked Hinata and Lee gawked at Neji with wide, utterly shocked eyes. “N-Neji-ni-san…Y-you auditioned for the play? W-why?” questioned a stuttering Hinata, who knew that this was not something the Neji she knew would do.

Neji simply turned his head slightly, shooting a glare at Hinata.

Now, normally, Neji's glares were very powerful. After all, he despised the Hyuuga Main House, for reasons that are kind of odd. And he, like Sasuke, was a cold-hearted, emotionless bastard. But today's glare was…Well…Let's just say that if looks could kill, Hinata would be dead five trillion times and over.

Frightened, Hinata jumped a good five meters away.

Kiba turned. “Eh? Hinata, how did you get here from all the way over there?”

“All right, all right, calm down, everyone!” spoke Iruka. “Ahem, playing the role of Benvolio will be…Nara Shikamaru!”

Once again, murmurs ran through the horde of people. “Yay, Shikamaru!” shouted Ino, quite literally glomping the poor Chuunin. “Isn't it great? You got a part!”

Shikamaru scowled with Ino hanging off him. “Che…How irritating…Now I actually have to memorize this stuff…”

Chouji patted him on the back. “Could be worse…You could have Sasuke's part…”

“Feh. How troublesome…”

“Okay, next,” spoke a reserved Shino, “playing the part of Mercutio will be…Inuzuka Kiba…”

Kiba's eyes went wide. “WHAT!?” He and Naruto shouted in union.

“Shino! I did a good job! Tenten thought so too! I should have gotten the part, not Kiba! I know he acted horribly!”

“Shut the hell up, Naruto!” Kiba turned to Shino. “Oi! Shino! How dare you give me a part?!” He shook his fist at him angrily.

“K-Kiba-kun…I think it's g-great you got a part…” said Hinata.

Immediately, Kiba shut up, and looked down, a small blush over his cheeks.

“A-a-a-a-and…N-Naruto-kun…I'm sure Tenten-chan and Shino-kun g-gave you a-a-a part…Y-y-y-you did a great j-job…”

Naruto smiled a little. “Thanks Hinata.”

The white-eyed girl blushed, and looked down, poking her fingers together.

“Okay then…” said Tenten, slightly rolling her eyes at the scene before her. “Playing the part of the Nurse will be…” She giggled rather evilly, as all the girls held their breaths. Every single one of them knew that the worst part to get was the Nurse's, since they'd have to watch Sasuke-kun be with someone else. They'd have to suffer the pain and ache of playing servant to whoever played Juliet, and they'd have barely any scenes with Sasuke. It was as bad as not getting a part at all.

“…Haruno Sakura!”

Sakura paled as Ino snickered. “Told you Sakura!”

“No…No…It can't be true…How could I not get the part? How…” she spoke to herself. The pink-haired kunoichi felt like sobbing

“DAMN YOU SHINO, YOU STUPID BUG BOY! CURSE YOU TENTEN, YOU BUNHEADED FREAK! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!” shouted Inner-Sakura as she raised her Inner-katana and chopped Inner-Shino (if he existed) into pieces, while impaling several kunais at Inner-Tenten (whom we know defiantly exists).

However, with no other choice, Outer-Sakura slouched depressingly as she marched over the join the other ninjas…err…actors?

“Anno…continuing,” spoke Iruka as the crowd of girls quieted down. “Playing the part of Friar Laurence will be…Jiraiya-sama.”

“YOSHA!” shouted the Sennin in glee. Now you may be thinking…Jiraiya? Glee? That may sound weird, but it is quite reasonable. With this role, Jiraiya had secured the fact that Tsunade will not be closing down his bathhouses. Thus, he would be enjoying all the peeping he wants. That, my friend, is why he is in glee…

“Ho ho ho!” laughed the white-haired sennin. “Yes! You can't do anything now Tsunade! Yes, my beautiful babes…Jiraiya shall be back…Hehehe…Icha Icha Paradise will strive even more! Hahahahaha!”

“Pervert…” muttered Tenten. “Anyways! Playing the parts of Capulet and Lady Capulet will be Shiranui Genma-san and Yuuhi Kurenai-sensei!”

“Hm…Capulet…not a bad role…” spoke Genma. “Ne, Kurenai?”

“Fine with me…” spoke the Genjutsu specialist. “As long as your not Gai.”

Iruka flipped the page and continued. “All right, the next pair, Montague and Lady Montague will be played by Mitarashi Anko and Maito Gai.”

Anko paled. No…this couldn't be happening to her! Out of all the people in the world, she has to play his wife? The world was coming to and end. The “Naruto-ish” Jounin felt like bursting into tears as Gai waved at from across the crowd.

“ANKO! MY WIFE!” He ran to her…to hug her of course. After all, they would be playing husband and wife. And Gai has always had an affinity for Anko.

But just as Gai was about to embrace her, Anko's fist hit him squarely in the face, sending him flying far into the sky in a big boom. “Team Rocket is blasting off again…Wait! Wrong lines!”

“What the hell was that kid thinking!?” Anko cried in horrification, as Gai nursed his bruised and bleeding cheeked from a few meters away from the angry kunoichi.

“It won't be that bad, Anko,” spoke Genma.

“Not that bad? NOT THAT BAD!? Genma, you idiot! Have you met Maito Gai?” She shuddered. “The eyebrows…the eyebrows…Yes, yes, I know he is a competent Jounin, but it still doesn't mean he can't annoy the hell out of me! Argh! This can't be happening to me!” Anko cursed some more. “If he gets on my nerves, I swear I will turn him into ramen and feed him to Naruto!”

“Wouldn't you be turning Naruto into a cannibal, then?” spoke Kurenai.

“…He won't know the difference…”

“Okay then,” said Tenten. “Playing the part of anno…Paris will be…anno…anno…” She gulped, and turned to Shino for support. Her face seemed to speak don't make me do it! However, Shino nodded, urging her to go on. “The part of Paris will be played by…Rock Lee…”

A large gasp of utter shock, surprise, and well, horror, was heard throughout the crowd. No one could believe it, especially the girls. Lee had gained the role of the Adonis Paris. How was that possible? For after all, Rock Lee, bless his lame soul, is not exactly the most beautiful creature in the world. In any case, he is Gai's clone. He was just a little too pathetic for his own good. Meeting Gai has its consequences.

So how did he get the part? Did he trick the judges? Did he bribe them? Did he bake them brownies and cook them breakfast, with ham, bacon, omelets, and pancakes? Did he sleep with them? Wait…that would be wrong, so very, very wrong…

“Really? Me? I get to play Paris?” said Lee with glittering eyes.

“Wee! Wecewent wob!” said Gai. The poor Jounin's face, care of Anko's delicate nurture, was beaten up, bruised, and bleeding, thus Gai had difficulty pronouncing words. What he had actually meant to say was, “Lee! Excellent job!”

With bright, believing eyes, Lee looked up at his sensei.

“Gai-sensei!”

“Wee!”

Sunset, rocks, and big waves, they embrace. The entire crowd sweat-dropped, and Goosebumps ran down their backs.

“I actually feel sorry for whoever has to play Juliet, with him wooing her…” spoke Neji.

“Too true…” said Shikamaru. The chuunin suddenly jumped, blinking in surprise, before turning to Neji. “Did you just make a joke?”

Meanwhile, Tenten glared hatefully at Shino. “I can't believe you did this…What the hell were you thinking? Are you on drugs? No, wait…are your bugs on drugs?”

“No…They do not need any…”

The dark-haired kunoichi sweat-dropped. “Can't take a joke, can you?”

“I have my reasons for choosing him, Tenten.”

“Oh really?” she spoke sarcastically. “And here I thought you just became insane over night.”

“Anyway,” spoke Iruka, turning away from the two. “Continuing on…Playing the part of the Prince will be…” He blushed. “Hatake Kakashi.”

Everybody looked around, but Kakashi was nowhere to be found. Hey that rhymes!

“How much do you want to bet he's late?” whispered Sasuke.

“All my life savings…” replied Naruto.

Gai clenched his fist, shaking it in anger. “Wam wo Wawashi, with wis why woo ware my wavel! Wetting whe wart wof whe Wrince! Why would wet whe wart! With wime wo win! Wifty wive to wifty wour! Wut wat weast why wet wo whee with mwhy weer wrewous Wanko…Wewewe…”

Lee looked up at his sensei in question. “Nani?”

What Gai meant to say, of course, was, “Damn you Kakashi, this is why you are my rival! Getting the part of the Prince! I should get that part! This time you win! 55 to 54! But at least I get to be with my dear precious Anko…Hehehe…”

Tenten smiled. “The rest of the roles are posted up. And now, without much further ado…For Konoha's version of Romeo and Juliet, the part of the lovely Juliet, who shall be played opposite of Uchiha Sasuke will be…”

The entire crowd sat on the edge of their seat. Everyone had been waiting for this. When Juliet's actor was announced, there would be an uproar. Every single person wanted to know. Everyone had his or her speculation. Who could it be? Who could have Aburame Shino chosen to be Juliet?

Different names were running around in everyone's heads.

Kiba thought, “It has to be Hinata…I know it's Hinata! Dammit, Shino, I can't believe you chose Hinata!”

Naruto thought, “Few…at least it's not Sakura-chan. Maybe it's Ino…”

Neji thought, “I have a bad, bad, bad feeling about this…If Aburame suddenly twists it and has Tenten act as Juliet, I will kill him!”

Chouji thought, “Chips…chips…chips…I can't believe Ino still hasn't given back my chips!”

Sakura thought, “I can't believe it's not me…I can't believe it! Well…on the bright side, at least I'm not being wooed by Lee…” And of course, Inner-Sakura thought, “Die Shino die! How dare you not choose me as Juliet! If you choose Ino, I'm going to destroy you! Well…on the bright side, at least I'm not being wooed by Lee…”

Lee thought, “NOOOOOOO! SAKURA-SAN! I won't get to woe my beautiful Sakura…My precious…I wonder who I shall be wooing, then. Maybe it will be Hinata…Oh dear God, Neji would blow his top if that happened…”

Ino thought, “HAHAHA! SAKURA YOU LOOSE! I SHALL BE THE ONE TO PLAY JULIET! HAHAHAHAHA!”

However, no one was thinking as hard as Shikamaru, as he felt that something really was off. “Who could have Shino chose? Yachiru, she's pretty…No no…or maybe Eriko? No way, she was the one Tenten almost killed…Wakana? Impossible…she's way too young. Hinata? No…she doesn't have the stage experience or skill…Ino? Ha! I'd like to see Shino do that…so who…who could it be?”

Then…it hit him. The chuunin's eyes widened in realization and shock. Shikamaru realized who would play Juliet, the same time Tenten called out that person's name…

“The one who will play Juliet is…”

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On a rooftop in the quiet and peaceful village of Konoha, two pairs of eyes stared down intently at the crowd of people that gathered before the Konoha Ninja Academy. The loud sound of the horde of fangirls had tickled the two traveler's curiosity, and they had come to see what all the commotion was about.

“Tsunade's mad…Absolutely mad…What a stupid idea! Shakespeare! Ha!”

“Don't mock her…I actually think it's quiet…Interesting…”

“WHAT!?”

“I've enjoyed Shakespeare's plays in the past…”

“…”

“It will be quite interesting to see how this turns out…”

“So we're staying here?”

“For the time, being, yes…I would not miss this for the world…”

And in a flash, the two figures disappeared from the rooftops.

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“The one who will play Juliet is…”

Shino sighed. Iruka gulped. And Tenten smiled rather mischievously.

“…Uzumaki Naruto…”

A great silenced followed. Crickets chirped, and a tumbleweed blew across the side of the road.

The silenced continued for what seemed like several hundreds of years…

Until…

“WHAT!?” shouted everyone in union.

“What do you mean Uzumaki Naruto?”

“You've got to be joking me!”

“This is an outrage!”

“What are you people thinking!?”

Shock would have been mild to describe the reaction from one simple name. Most people either passed out, or simply stared blankly at the three judges. Thoughts of outrage and incomprehensible shock ran through all of their heads. There was not one person who wasn't thinking… “WHAT THE HELL!!?”

Kiba thought, “What the hell!? Has Shino gone nuts? He really has gone nuts! Does he want to be killed by a bunch of rampaging hormonal women? Well…at least Hinata isn't playing Juliet…”

Neji thought, “What the hell!? Have they gone nuts!? I'm surprised Uchiha hasn't gone rampaging like his aniki and killing everyone in sight! Well…at least I'm not in his position…I feel a bit sorry for Naruto though…Thank god it's not Hinata or Tenten…”

Chouji thought, “What the hell!? They've gone nuts! I'm surprised Ino has gone rampaging around town killing anonymous people…of course, she would kill Shino first…Well…at least then I'll get my chips back…”

Jiraiya thought, “What the hell!? Those guys have gone nuts! They're going to be killed by a bunch rampaging hormonal fangirls…”

Genma thought, “What the hell!? Those guys have gone nuts!? This will never work! What are they thinking? They are going to be killed by a bunch of rampaging hormonal psychotic fangirls…I guess I should start thinking of eulogies…”

Kurenai thought, “What the hell!? Has Shino lost it? What is he thinking, giving Naruto the part of Juliet? Is he drunk? He must bee drunk! That's the only explanation for his insanity! Oh my god, I'm going to loose a student due to a bunch of rampaging love-crazed fangirls…”

Anko thought, “@#$%!!! @#$&#@#&$@$#$@$#!@#$#!@$?%$#@?!@#$?$#%!?@#%&?#@&!!”

Basically…what Anko thought was some pretty terribly profanity. If a telepath suddenly read her mind, they would be hearing Anko swearing like Captain Ahab as he is chasing Moby Dick (yes, I do mean the whale) all over the Pacific. And Anko doesn't even SAIL!

Hinata thought, “What the hell was Shino-kun thinking!? Naruto-kun as Juliet? He's going to be killed by all those Sasuke love-crazed hormonal teenagers! What was Shino-kun thinking!? Why the #@$&!?”

My…wasn't that out of character…

Lee thought, “WHAT THE HELL!? What is Shino thinking? How could Tenten let this happened! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I'll have to woo Naruto! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

And all the fangirls thought…

“WHAT THE FREAKIN HELL!? @#$?!%&!!! ABURAME SHINO, YOU ARE GOING TO SUFFER THE SIX TORTURE METHODS OF THE SASUKE FANGIRLS!!!!! WHAT THE HELL WAS HE THINKING!? UZUMAKI NARUTO WITH OUR PRECIOUS SASUKE-KUN! HE STOLE HIS FIRST KISS, AND NOW THIS!? WHAT THE @#$&!”

Far away, in the Hokage's office, Tsunade laughed hysterically. “Bwuahahahahahahaha! Shino you are a genius! Hahaha! I should invite all the other Kage's for this show! Hahaha! I should get my own monument for this! Hahaha!” Suddenly, realization hit Tsunade as she turned to Shizune. “Anno…Make sure Sasuke doesn't kill Naruto, okay?”

Meanwhile, everyone else had started yelling and ranting to the three poor judges. Tenten was trying her best to not kill someone…technically. Iruka was trying desperately to calm everyone down. And Shino…well, if one had looked closely, they would have seen a tiny, tiny, tiny, itty-bitty smile on his face. This was highly amusing to the bug using shinobi.

“I can't believe you did this!” shouted Tenten over the mob of people, carrying torches and pitch-forks, as if they were hunting for Frankenstein's monster. “I knew this would happen! That settles it! You're on drugs!”

“Shino, are you really sure about this?” shouted Iruka. “This looks like a dangerous territory you have crossed into!”

“Don't worry…I have a plan…Everything is going to work out…”

“WHAT?” shouted the two in union; the crowd was very loud, but Shino was very quiet.

“I said…Don't worry, I have a plan. Everything is going to work out…”

“WHAT?”

“Never mind…”

“WHAT?”

“…”

As the horde of people ranted at the three judges, Sasuke, who stood a few meters away from the crowd spoke to himself… “Juliet is…the dobe…Naruto is…Juliet. And I am Romeo…I will be play opposite of Naruto…” He pulled his hair in frustration. “This can't be happening! NOOOOOOOO! I should have let Itachi kill me!” He shook his head in horrification. “This can't be happening! It can't! ARGH! I wonder if Orochimaru can get me out of here…” The Uchiha sighed depressingly. “Damn Shino…Damn Tenten…Damn Iruka-sensei…DAMN THAT LOUSY WOMAN WHO CALLS HERSELF HOKAGE! At leas it's not a fangirl…but…but why me!” He was on the verge of tears… “It's as if some dark, evil, sadistic, sociopathical, omnipotent, yaoi-loving freak is controlling my life, and seems to love to torture me!” He groaned as he turned to Naruto…

“Yay! I get one of the lead roles!” spoke the blonde cheerfully. But suddenly, he realized what type of role he would be playing. His eyes widened in shock. “R-R-Romeo is Sasuke…NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! That is wrong! So very wrong! They must have been drunk, or stoned, or insane when they did this! What the @#$& were they thinking!” He pulled his hair! “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Thus, he promptly passed out…

Once he looked over, Sasuke saw that Naruto was one the ground, out cold.

“Naruto?”

“…I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I…a-a-a-a-a-am…p-p-p- playing J-J-J-J-J-J-J-Juliet…w-w-with…S-Sa-Sa-Sasuke a-a-as…R-R-R-Ro-Romeo…”

“Naruto? Are you okay?”

“…”

“Holy crap…”

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On the newly built Konoha Theatre stage stood the cast of Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet. Some were nervous, some were excited, some were pissed off supremely, and some felt like committing murder. Director Aburame Shino stared at his cast. He was determined to make them the best actors they could be. Sure, many of them were extremely annoyed and irritated, but Shino was no ordinary director. He had his methods, and he was determined to make this the best Shakespearean play ever made!

Stage Manager Tenten gazed at the cast of Konoha's Romeo and Juliet. She knew many of them would rather be horned by a goat than be here (after all, most of them were blackmailed into doing this), but she was determined to do the best job she can to make this show a success. Sure, it was going to be a difficult time to get everything read in a little under a month. But dammit, she was going to have her way and make this the best show ever!

Costume Director Umino Iruka gazed at many of his former students and colleagues, who would be acting in Konoha's Romeo and Juliet. Now, the Academy teacher knew that it was going to be a difficult month with these actors, and with them running around, it would be almost impossible to get everything ready. But he was determined to make this work!

So basically, this is how it was: you have group of inexperienced, piss-off ninjas for actors and three stress, but resolute coordinators, determined to make this work. But nobody was exactly happy with their role.

And they are as follows…

Sasuke: Romeo

Naruto: Juliet

Neji: Tybalt

Shikamaru: Benvolio

Kiba: Mercutio

Sakura: Nurse

Ino: Rosaline

Jiraiya: Friar Laurence

Lee: Paris

Genma: Capulet

Kurenai: Lady Capulet

Gai: Montague

Anko: Lady Montague

Chouji: Friar John

Kotetsu: Sampson

Izumo: Gregory

Ebisu: Abraham

Konohamaru: Balthasar

Udon: Peter

Asuma: Apothecary

Kakashi: Prince

Hinata: Narrator

“Dammit!” thought the three in union. “I'm going to make this work!”

FIVE HOURS LATER

“DAMMIT NARUTO, GET BACK HERE!”

“NO! I REFUSE! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!”

Sasuke sweat-dropped as he watched Tenten chase Naruto around this stage, trying to forced him to do the Sexy no Jutsu (since, after all, that was the whole reason as to why Shino picked him in the first place). However, Naruto, being the stubborn idiot he always is, refused to do any scenes with Sasuke. (He still hasn't recovered from the shock.) But there was no way to make the play work if Naruto wasn't in Sexy no Jutsu form. And this was exactly why Tenten was not screaming after the blonde, kunai in hand.

“NARUTO! GET BACK HERE!”

“No! NO!”

The dark haired youth sighed, as he went back to looking over his lines.

Meanwhile, in another section of the stage, Sakura and Ino were in an all out battle, and there seemed to be no end in site. Sakura was saying to Ino how she at least gets a good part in the play with lines, while Ino was just a stage character with no lines at all. And Ino was saying how she was acting as Sasuke (Romeo)'s love interest, and that it would soon become true. Thus, this is why they were fighting as if they were in the Chuunin exams again.

A little away from them, Shikamaru and Kiba were acting out their lines. Shikamaru, though still complaining as to the fact that he didn't want to be here or be acting, felt that at least he was doing a better job than Kiba, who was stumbling through his lines without a clue as to what he was saying.

In the meantime, Kurenai was attempting to fix Hinata's little speech problem. Since the timid girl would be the narrator for the play, she had to speak well. But poor Hinata was tripping over her own words, stuttering every few minutes when she was reminded that she had to do this in front of all of Konoha.

Gai and Anko on the other hand…Well, Anko was simply beating Gai to a pulp, shouting profanity and hatred for thick-eyebrows every few minutes.

Jiraiya, being his normal perverted self, was ogling at the female extras, trying lines that he had heard from certain Animes, such as “Will you bare my children?” Of course, he was unaware that these lines were not the best pick-up lines in the world.

Kakashi…well…He was no where to be found…Late, perhaps.

And Neji…Well…

“Please Neji!”

“No.”

“I need these measurements!”

“No.”

“Please!”

“I refuse to wear any…costumes…Especially tights”

Iruka sighed. “B-but it wouldn't be a show without them! And tights have always been a tradition!”

“I don't care. No is no.”

“But Neji!”

Fighting, chasing, perversion, begging…You name it, it was there.

Shino sighed as he looked at the chaos that was currently unfolding on the stage of the Konoha Theatre. The bug-using shinobi suddenly felt an overwhelming sense of hopelessness. How as he going to make this work? How in Megami-sama's name was he going to make this play work, in less than a month!?

Shino sighed.

He was a lamb to the slaughter.

FIVE MORE HOURS LATER

Kakashi looked around the stage, but nobody was there. “Am I late?”

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To be continued…

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End Note

Hahahaha! I'm finally done chapter four! Yes! T-T I'm so happy! I'm so sorry, minna-san, for not updating earlier. Homework and stress were two key factors. But here it is, chapter four. I know it was kinda short, but at least you got it.

::smiles:: And yes! I finally revealed the cast! If you have any comments, please tell me. I would like to hear your opinions. As for those currently screaming… “NARUTO AS JULIET? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Don't worry. I actually have a purpose for this. Remember, this is not, and I repeated, NOT A SHONEN-AI/YAOI FIC! There are no pairings, just a lot of teasing and hinting. By the way, if you have suggestions, tell me about them…

Anyways, I'll work hard to get the next chapter out…Don't forget to review!

Domo arigatou,

Jia Zhang

So the cast is made…but no one is happy with their roles. Disaster is hitting the little production left and right. Is there some kind of curse? Or is everyone simply not getting along? And Shino seems to be cracking under the pressure. Time is ticking and nothing is going well. What will the bug shinobi do? Will Sasuke and Naruto survive each other? What is Neji being blackmailed with? And who are the two people watching the production? Find out in the next chapter of Shakespeare Lives!

© October, 2004 by Jia Zhang. All rights reserved.