Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ The Curative Career of Kaori the Ninja Nurse ❯ The Strange Man in Green ( Chapter 4 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

The Strange Man in Green

The rest of Kaori's morning was spent catching up on paperwork as usual. When lunchtime came around, it was Otoha's job to see to the patients and Kaori was left manning the front desk by herself.

Curious to learn more about Kakashi, she logged onto his administrative records and learned he graduated the Academy at age 5, became a chuunin at 6, and a jounin at 13. His distinguished career included 38 S missions, 276 A missions, 413 B missions, 189 C missions, 197 D missions at the last computerized update.

As a senior medical professional, she was also able to access other confidential records. A search on Hatake revealed there was no more of the Hatake clan in Konoha. Each available record had deceased at the top of the file. Hatake Sakumo, his father was apparently a great shinobi who died when Kakashi was 8, by suicide according to the autopsy records. Kaori also ran a search on Kakashi's teammates whose names she retrieved from the admin records. She felt like a stalker but convinced herself she needed to know all about him in order to help him. It was not some strange obsession.

She found that Kakashi received the sharingan from Uchiha Obito, his teammate. His other teammate Rin was also deceased. Kaori vaguely remembered Rin. She was a shinobi medic and thus attended a few of the same medical classes with her, but Rin was much more advanced. `See what talent gets you,' Kaori thought sadly, `Guess I should be glad to be a lowly nurse (but a damn good one!).' And of course his sensei, the Fourth was also long gone.

The more she learned about her sleeping prince, the deeper her sympathy, and a great respect for this man, who sacrificed so much of himself for the village, developed. She could not reconcile the image of the man she formed from his paper trail with Otoha's allegations. Was he a pervert? It couldn't be true. How could a man with such a distinguished service record, who kept his mask on all the time (indicating an obsession with privacy), who had had no sexual harassment charges on record, be a pervert?

Was he really a notorious ladies' man? That didn't make sense either. How could a man who perpetually wore a mask be… intimate with that many women without his face being known? `Unless it was all done in complete darkness…how…kinky…'

And what about all of Gai's boasting that he was better than Kakashi? Based on their mission records, Kakashi was definitely better, with more A and S class missions. Gai's assertion, that he saved Kakashi, seemed to be rather suspect in her opinion.

Kaori decided that all of this was hearsay, just shinobi gossip perpetrated by envious imps to tarnish an honorable man's reputation. Of course Kaori did believe he read smut books, all men were addicted to porn, but being an actual pervert was something entirely different.

Her ponderous thoughts were interrupted by a flash of bright green. Gai suddenly appeared before her, smiling his shiny white smile. Before she could greet him, Gai launched into his prepared speech. “Nurse Kaori, I would like to thank you again for the excellent care you have shown to my dear Lee…”

“You're welcome, I'm just doing my job…”

“Maybe so, but I would like to do something special for you. You deserve it.”

`Is he trying to bribe me into letting Lee do more exercise training?' “Thank you but it's not necessary…”

“I am offering you the honor of accompanying me to dinner.”

Kaori was confused by his words. `Does that mean there's an award ceremony he wants me to attend?' “Sorry, I can't get involved with patients…”

“I'm not a patient…” Gai pointed out.

“…or their parents or relatives or friends.” Not exactly true but her usual excuse when she was not interested.

“No problem. I'm Lee's sensei. So when should I pick you up?” the man in green insisted.

“I can't…I have several errands to run today…”

“I'll run all your errands for you,” Konoha's noble green beast offered.

“Er…no thank you. It involves…female stuff.” `That always works!'

“Tomorrow then?” Gai asked, nonplussed.

“I'm having dinner with my parents tomorrow…” A true statement.

“The day after that?”

“I…I…I'm having dinner with my…dog.” `No one can continue to miss the brush off with that excuse, especially since I don't have a dog.'

“Ah, yes, ensuring your pet feels secure and loved is of utmost importance. I treat all my summoned animals the same way. I see we have much in common. Well, in that case you may join me for lunch now.”

“Now? I…I…uh…I don't have much time. I was just planning to grab something from the hospital cafeteria.”

“Ah, that's a wonderful place of quiet ambiance.”

`You have got to be kidding me! Who likes hospital cafeterias much less the crappy food? Well, if I have lunch with him just this once, then I'm off the hook. He just wants to do something nice because of Lee. It's not like he's interested in women,' Kaori appraised. “I guess that would be okay. I just need to wait for Nurse Otoha to return from her lunch rounds.”

“Then I'll wait.”

“How about you wait in the cafeteria for me. I should be there in about 20 minutes.” Kaori wisely suggested since she did not want Ms. Gossip Otoha to know.

“All right, I'll be waiting with my eternal patience.”

Kaori just nodded at the strange man in green. `How bad could it be? It's only a 15 minute lunch break…'

When Kaori arrive at the cafeteria, she found several small tables pushed next to each other with food laid out end to end. Gai had ordered one of everything available, including all the different colors of jello (they all tasted the same). He was sitting there with Lee at his side. The doublemint twins smiled and waved her over.

Kaori looked around the cafeteria and was relieved to find there wasn't anyone else around since it was already late and most preferred lunch elsewhere.

Gai quickly got up and pulled out a chair for her. Lee stood up as well, though a bit wobbly. Gai bowed like a maître d' and waited until Kaori was seated. “I took the liberty of ordering for all of us,” he said, proud of his generosity and his solution to saving time and wondering what kind of food Kaori liked.

“Food is always better with company,” Lee said with great alacrity, proud of how smart his sensei was to have ordered all this food.

“Er…yes…this is a lot of food.” Kaori frowned at the waste. There was no way the three of them would be able to finish it all. But then she had a practical thought - she would be able to save some food for later and postpone another night of cooking. “So Lee…it looks like you've regained your appetite.”

“Oh yes, and it's all thanks to you.”

“Me?”

“My near death experience with the slice of orange reminded me how lucky I am to be alive despite my injuries. I must consume an adequate supply of calories and nutrients in order to fully recover.”

“Well I'm glad you realize that.”

Meanwhile Gai had compiled a plate for Kaori. “Judging by your height and weight, estimated daily physical activity, and pallor of your skin, you require a minimum of 5700 calories and an extra dose of vitamin D.

Kaori looked at the pile of food on her plate. If she were to eat like that everyday, she would easily gain ten pounds a week. It seemed they based her calorie requirements on their physical activity.

“The cheeseburger is the perfect food. You have your meat, dairy, grain, fruit and vegetables all in one,” Gai explained.

“Fruit?” asked Kaori.

“The nutritious tomato is actually a fruit,” Lee pointed out.

“A slice of pizza with everything on it is also perfect,” Gai continued. “There's sausage and pepperoni, mushrooms and peppers, cheese, crust, and tomato sauce. Something from each of the required food groups.”

“That's true…but I really can't eat that much. I don't need that many calories.”

“Sure you do. You're too thin,” Gai bluntly pointed out.

“Thank you for saying that but I won't be if I eat all this.” `I'm not too thin, based on the standardized height and weight charts, I am at a perfectly desirable ratio,' Kaori added to herself.

“You need some more meat on your bones which you can then develop into muscle,” Gai insisted, “Then you'll be closer to perfection like I am.”

“Huh? I don't need to be perfect. I'm happy with the way I am.”

“Of course you are but there's always room for improvement. We should all try to be the best that we can be,” Gai said encouragingly.

Lee nodded enthusiastically at his sensei's words. “Yes, if it were not for Gai-sensei's training and nutrition program, I would not be the shinobi I am today.”

“That's true…but…” Kaori weakly protested.

”Eat up!” With that demand, Gai and Lee dove into their food.

Kaori stared at the grease on her plate. When was the last time she indulged herself? And Gai did have a point about covering all the food groups. So she picked up the cheeseburger and bit deeply into it. “I'll just have the cheeseburger, no pizza, fries, or dessert,' she compromised. `Well maybe the green jello, no not green, no more green! The red jello…'

Meanwhile her lunch dates proceeded to consume everything else, even the fried chicken bones, which were an excellent source of calcium.

Kaori ate in silence, concentrating on chewing her food thoroughly, wondering if the two were long lost brothers since the age differential indicated they could not possibly be father and son. `Or maybe the shinobi medics succeeded in their cloning techniques…'

In between impossibly large gulps, Gai regaled his audience with tales of his most exciting, most dangerous missions (with Lee adding reminders of details Gai left out, apparently Lee had memorized all the stories), including how he saved his eternal rival Kakashi from the Uchiha prodigy missing-nin Akatsuki member. He further tweaked the story with more bells and whistles from the first time Kaori heard it.

At the mention of Kakashi, Kaori immediately perked up. “So Kakashi's your eternal rival? Since when?”

“Since we were in the Academy together.”

“But he graduated before you did.”

Gai frowned at the accuracy of her information. “I graduated just a year after him.”

“So you've been in pursuit of him practically all your life?”

“Pursuit?”

“Seems like he's always ahead of you in graduating, making chuunin, jounin…”

“Not anymore! I have surpassed my rival! I have a record of 51 wins vs his 50. I killed 38 enemies during the Sound and Sand attack versus Kakashi's 37.”

“Really? You've fought him that many times? You keep count of how many you killed? Is that really something that you should be proud of?” Kaori did not mean to be critical but she couldn't help but disapprove of the super-competitive nature of most shinobi which, lead to many serious and unnecessary injuries. `He seems to have an unhealthy obsession with Kakashi. Hmm…I wonder if it's something more…'

“A rival is a shinobi's greatest strength. That's how I've kept my resolve to improve. I learned that from Gai-sensei,” Lee said defensively.

“That's right, Lee. Everyone should have a rival in life or love. That's what tests your mettle. That's when you can show what kind of person you can be.” But inwardly Gai was taken aback by Kaori's words. This woman of his destiny seemed to be strangely unimpressed by his exploits, but a woman who plays hard to get just makes the pursuit more challenging…

And Gai always loved a challenge.

-...-...-...-

Author's Notes: For some reason I've used Gai a lot more in my stories than I would have thought. I don't particularly like him and I find him difficult to write for, but it seems like he's the closest thing to a friend poor Kakashi has (check out "Kakashi's Stolen Sharingan" second part of “Kakashi and the Kunoichi from Thunder Country” where they go on a mission together). I'm trying hard not to write the stereotypical Gai, so there will be no loud declarations of love, per se.