Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ The Curative Career of Kaori the Ninja Nurse ❯ Kaori�s Day Off ( Chapter 6 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Author's Notes: I estimate that Naruto and Jiraiya were gone for about 3 months, but I won't be writing 3 months worth of material!

Kaori's Day Off

Kaori got up an hour later than her usual workday time. She allowed herself the luxury of that extra hour on her days off. Anymore would be too disruptive to her system. She went through her usual morning routine and sadly opened her empty refrigerator, wishing very badly that magical elves filled it during the night. Alas, it was still empty except for the one-third container of miso ramen from last night, which she wisely saved.

After heating up and eating her leftovers, Kaori changed to her regular casual clothes - a simple red blouse, which complemented her chestnut hair, and black pants, which were practical. Instead of tying her hair up in her usual official bun, she tied it in a loose ponytail. The pretty nurse's brow furrowed as she applied her make-up, thinking over her two dilemmas: food and porn.

`First things first. I have to get groceries.' She then sat at her little dining table, pencil in hand, writing down her grocery list.

`Chicken, cereal, eggs, milk, fruit…bananas, oranges, grapes…vegetables…asparagus, lettuce, tomato…no that's a fruit…well, whatever…”

Then her thoughts strayed to her second dilemma. How could she get a hold of an Icha Icha book without anyone knowing? She could not just walk into an adult bookstore. She did not want even the cashier to know. After all, how would it look to have Kuchiki Kaori, the prim and proper nurse, an example to all her peers, be a known porn reader? She couldn't have it delivered either. Even though she heard adult material was wrapped in plain brown paper, anything from Pink's Bookstore would give her away to the postman. Maybe if she ordered it from a large bookstore which offered everything…but then it would take too long to deliver. And whoever filled the order would know. Even if she used a different name, her address would give her away and she had no P.O. Box. It was a dilemma she could not solve in her paranoid state.

`Maybe if I broke into Kakashi's home and borrowed his books…'

She was shaken out of her thoughts by a series of loud rapid knocks at her door. She opened it to find Konoha's self-proclaimed noble green beast standing there with his arms full of grocery bags.

“I hear you're in dire need of sustenance,” Gai said gallantly while entering Kaori's abode without her permission.

It took a minute before Kaori understood what was going on. Lee must have informed his sensei that she needed to buy food and Gai decided to run her errands for her. She watched as Gai unpacked all the staples (two dozen eggs, a gallon of milk, a ten pound bag of rice, ten pounds of hamburger meat, a dozen pork chops, four shell steaks, and a family pack of chicken drumsticks which would easily last her single self all week), fruit (a large bunch of bananas, a sack of oranges, a huge honeydew melon, and a quart of blueberries), and vegetables (a large bunch of carrots, a huge head of cabbage, five heads of broccoli, two bags of spinach, and a long vine of fresh tomatoes…no…that's a fruit).

“This should last you a couple of days,” Gai proclaimed proudly. He then proceeded to talk about the nutritional benefits of antioxidants found in blueberries, beta-carotene found in carrots, iron in spinach, potassium in bananas, and vitamin C in oranges and tomatoes, which were actually fruit.

“Er…thanks, but I can't eat all this. I don't think this will even fit in my fridge. I'll just pay you back for the few items that I need…”

“Pay? Pay me back for expressing my gratitude for the excellent care that you've shown my dear Lee? This is nothing! Take it all! I'll make it fit in your refrigerator.” Gai proceeded to organize the groceries. “I hope your dog likes the ground sirloin,” Gai added as he found a place for it.

“Dog? Oh…yes, I'm sure he'll love it.” Kaori knew she shouldn't accept the groceries, especially the meat since that was based on a lie. Ethically it would appear that Gai was bribing her to provide special care for his student even if he meant it as gratitude. But her practical mind screamed at her to take it and freeze whatever she could and eat whatever couldn't be frozen. Besides, who would know? And even if someone did, it was no different than a thank you gift basket of fruit or sausage and cheese, just much more.

Kaori decided to think of Gai as a large magical elf who just helped stock her refrigerator. He was well dressed for the part.

Then Kaori had another thought. “Can you do me a favor?”

“Anything for you, honorable lady.”

“Yeah, er, can you pick up a package from Pink's Book store? Tell them it's for …Inoue Otoha. I was supposed to pick it up for her, but I don't have time today to go to that part of town,” said the not-so-honorable lady.

“No problem. That's hardly a D mission for someone like me. Now if you would like me to deliver those books across the deserts of Wind Country to an opposing feudal lord who has a ban on books…”

“Uh, no, just pick it up and bring it here. I'm not sure how much it'll be but here…” Kaori fumbled for her purse.

“No need to give me any money. Think of it as a gift for your friend. Otoha… she's one of the other nurses, right?"

“Yes, well, please don't mention this to her since… she'll think I'm lazy.” Kaori could feel herself getting in deeper and deeper.

But luckily for her, Gai was not the inquisitive type. He was just happy to do a favor for the woman of his destiny. “I'll be back before you can bat even one of your lovely eyelashes,” he said with a wink and a thumbs up before he left the poor woman in peace.

“Thank you very much,” Kaori replied as she quickly closed the door and grabbed her phone. She immediately called Pink's Bookstore. She ordered the complete Icha Icha paperback set since it was less expensive than individual volumes and she figured paperback was good enough. She gave them Otoha's name and told them someone would come by in a few minutes to pay for them and pick them up. The clerk was confused and asked if she didn't already have a set. Kaori had to explain it was a gift for a friend. He also asked “Otoha” why she didn't return his calls. Kaori nicely told him she had been out of town and would love to get together with him later in the week. She felt herself sinking even deeper in the sea of deception.

Twenty minutes later, she heard the same loud rapid knocks on her door. Gai was already back with her package.

“The customer service at the bookstore is atrociously lacking,” he complained. “I had to wait for them to fill the order. You'd think they'd have it ready since it was pre-ordered. Those clerks need to undergo some of my speed efficiency training…”

“Er, yes thank you very much. Now I'm sure you're busy today so please don't let me keep you…” Kaori said guiltily, thinking how she just used him to get porn for his eternal rival.

“Yes, I have to meet my short handed team for another mission, but I'll see you later,” Gai said with a twinkle in his eye and in his too shiny smile.

“Later? But I…” Kaori was about to protest, but the odd man in green was already gone.

Kaori shrugged and figured she wasn't going to be home all day so there was no chance of running into Gai again. So she pushed away all thoughts of Gai and opened her package.

There they were. Three little orange books titled “Icha Icha Paradise” and three little red books titled “Icha Icha Violence.”

Kaori felt her cheeks warm and her fingers tremble as she reached for the first volume of the first set…

-…-…-…-

After running her errands (she still needed things other than what Gai bought) and eating lunch (vegetable omelet made from Gai's groceries) Kaori made her way to the hospital. She entered through the visitors' entrance and made her way quietly to Kakashi's room. But he was not alone. Her rival was there, suspiciously leaning over him.

“What do you think you're doing?” Kaori asked abruptly.

Otoha quickly turned and saw her superior glaring back. “Nothing, I was just adjusting his blankets.”

Kaori carefully examined the bedding and Kakashi's mask and clothes. It seemed Otoha was doing, or planned to do, much more than that.

“You don't need to be here anymore, I'll take over now,” Kaori ordered.

“Isn't today your day off?” protested the junior nurse.

“I'm continuing the reading sessions,” Kaori replied defensively.

“What's the point of reading to him? Even if he wakes up, he won't remember all you did for him. You'll just get a thank you at most and maybe a fruit basket - if he's generous,” Otoha said cruelly as she left.

“It's my job,” Kaori replied coldly to the closed door. But Otoha's words had hit a nerve. What would happen when Kakashi woke up? Would it be as Otoha said and she would never see him again? When would Naruto and Jiraiya return with Tsunade? It had only been two days. Kaori estimated it would take them at least a week. That was plenty of time to spend with her sleeping prince. She wouldn't have to worry about what came next for a while.

“Good-day Kakashi-san. Just ignore that bimbo. She's always wrong about everything. But I wonder when Jiraiya-sama and Naruto-san will return with Tsunade-sama. I wonder if Shizune-san is still with her. We used to be friends you know, but she's much more talented. I was extremely jealous back then and I'm afraid I wasn't very nice to her. Then she left and I never apologized. I haven't thought about her in years. I wonder if she still remembers me.”

Kaori sighed guiltily as she thought about her ex-childhood friend. Shizune was such a nice diffident girl, easy to pick on despite her talent. `I wonder if she's changed. She must be very strong now that she's been training directly with Tsunade-sama. So lucky, I wish I had a teacher like that.' Kaori didn't know what a drunken bitch Tsunade was, who rarely trained Shizune in anything. Poor Shizune had been reduced to being practically a slave these past years.

From her bag, Kaori took out “Icha Icha Paradise Volume 1” astutely wrapped in a book jacket titled “The Teachings of Konoha's Founding Hokage” in case anyone walked in. She had already ready the first 30 pages and found it hard to put down.

“I…er…brought over a copy of `Icha Icha Paradise,' the first book. I know you've read it already but I haven't so we'll start with that, okay?” Kaori looked over at her comatose patient and saw his right eyebrow twitching in anticipation. A series of little blips appeared on the monitor.

“It's much better than I expected. You can tell it's obviously written by a man, but the author has a good sense of what women want in terms of being courted and it's really funny. I have to admit I was shocked to learn the author is Jiraiya-sama himself. So that's what he retired to do…wait a minute… is he a pervert? How does someone come up with this stuff unless he is? Well, I guess he's had a hard life too, being in the shinobi wars and all that.” Kaori excused Jiraiya for his perversion since it seemed Kakashi was one of his biggest fans.

Kaori pushed a chair right up next to the bed. “Umm…hmm,” she cleared her throat and then tentatively read a sentence in a rather low voice and looked over at the monitor. It seemed her voice was loud enough as another blip appeared. Feeling a bit less embarrassed, Kaori read with more confidence, but careful to keep her voice at a low volume in case Otoha or someone else was spying on her.

Some time later, after twenty pages, Kaori sensed someone at the door. She quickly looked up and saw Sakura.

“Good afternoon Kaori-san,” Sakura said in greeting. “I just came in to check on the daffodil I bought yesterday. A daily change of water is best. I learned that from my flower arrangement class. Hey, what's that you're reading?”

“Er…it's a book of the first Hokage's teachings. You probably learned them at the Academy. I thought I'd take a refresher course,” Kaori said a bit nervously.

“Hmm, I should too, can I see that for a sec?” Sakura asked as she reached for the book.

`Oh no! What the hell am I going to do? I can't let her see that I'm actually reading porn! My reputation…' Kaori started to panic.

Suddenly she turned and pointed at the window. “WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!” she shouted hysterically.

Sakura quickly ran to the window with kunai at the ready. A scared pigeon flew away at her approach. She looked out into the inner courtyard. There was nothing unusual at all.

“Oh, I guess it was just the shadow of a bird. Sorry about that. Here's the book.” Kaori had quickly employed kawarimi to exchange the Icha Icha book with the appropriate one, which she luckily carried in her bag. `Good thing I keep up with my ninja skills, no matter how limited.' She mentally patted herself on the back.

Sakura flipped through the book and nodded. “Yes, this is the same one we had at the Academy, only an older edition,” the pink haired girl evaluated. “Well, since Kakashi-sensei already has a visitor, I'll go visit Sasuke-kun.” She gave Kaori a knowing smile. It was obvious to her that the nurse had a crush on her sensei - why else would she be here on her regular day off. But why would she choose to read such a boring book?

-...-...-...-

Next up: Kaori's Family Dinner