Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ The Reflection of Oneself ❯ Reflex ( Chapter 4 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

The Reflection of Oneself

Chapter 4: Reflex

Pain.

It causes a firestorm within our systems that can make us act irrationally.

Pain is the most powerful stimulant known in existence, as it can send your pulse madly racing whether you've pricked your finger or your heart has been broken. It can cause us to do stupid things, make us lash out when and hurt other when we are only trying to protect ourselves.

Some people have perished because of pain alone.

Sasuke hadn't returned to teach Nanikato the following day like he had said he would. No, the raven-haired man hadn't left his room at all that day. He remained in his room, seated at the desk next to his bed and wrote in a thick leather-bound journal he had procured for himself not long after coming to Otogakure.

Writing in his journal seemed to be the only thing that served to calm him down these days. One could say it was his diary, but then they would probably be beaten within an inch of their lives for doing so. But in actuality, it was simply just the record of his `misadventures' since his ill-fated departure from Konoha. It detailed everything he had ever done in these last twelve years - the favorable incidents… and the not so favorable incidents.

He wrote within it pages because he didn't want to want to loose himself.

Unfortunately he had doomed himself to such a fate by seeking out Orochimaru and now his days were numbered. Still, Sasuke had been determined to prolong his existence, by whatever means necessary. Thus he became a Reaper, `collecting' for his master possessors of the Advanced Bloodlines for the sake of new bodies. As long as Orochimaru had a new body every three years, Sasuke was safe.

He was determined to keep his body and his Sharingan, even if that meant he would have to offer up his own brother rather then have his revenge…

But his continued existence and Itachi aside, he was now facing an entirely new crisis.

It came in the form of a twelve-year blonde boy. From what he knew about Nanikato, the young clone seemed to be a mere shadow of which he had been created from. He was calmer, quieter and lacked all of the energy that Naruto had been so famous for. He seemed almost empty; a pathetic shell of what once had been something grand. But then he could surprise you the next moment, revealing a whole new side of himself that was rash, loud and bursting with energy. It was bewildering how quickly he would transition between personas.

It was what Sasuke hated that about him.

He hated the fact that Nanikato looked almost exactly like Naruto and hated him even more then he would have moments that were so Naruto-ish. Even though it wasn't the quiet blonde's fault at all for why he was the way he was, Sasuke couldn't help but become angry. He felt as though the boy was taking something away from him.

`W-was it worth it Sasuke?'

He growled, shaking his head angrily. He hadn't been plagued by Naruto's last words in over five years now.

`Make s-sure you kill him t-teme. D-don't let my d-death have been in vain'

But having taken its vacation, it was back again. Sighing agitatedly, Sasuke went back to writing and let it flow fitfully across the page.

I can't seem to get the voices out of my head anymore. I know Kabuto said that hearing voices is the first sign of insanity, but why should listen to that bastard anyway? I've been hearing voices since I was eight years old for crying out loud, and I've survived this long without cracking. I guess twelve years of this wasn't penance enough for what I had done to Naruto and finally he's come back to haunt me.

Is this how Kakashi-sensei felt after Obito died?

If so, I guess it will never go away. Because of my actions, Naruto died and now Nanikato has been born. I don't know what exactly it is, but I just can't seem to stand the very presence of the boy. I loathe him… and yet I find myself seeing a flicker of Naruto in his eyes more each day. While I know he isn't the dobe - he never will be - I find myself wishing was.

Or maybe I have already gone mad. I certainly wouldn't put it past the madness - after all, the Uchiha were never known for their stellar mentalities. But whatever the outcome, I must do something right with my life before I die. With Itachi still alive, I still have the clan to avenge. And then there's Naruto's death. I have to make sure it wasn't in vain.

Perhaps if I…

-.ooOoo.-

Two Weeks Later:

`I'm never going to be able to understand Sasuke-sensei…'

It had been bothering Nanikato for the last two weeks. Uchiha Sasuke was weird. He hadn't known his raven-haired sensei for very long, but he was certain of one thing and that was he would remain a mystery.

Under Sasuke-sensei's guidance, the blonde had fully come to understand the roll here in Oto and as a shinobi. He had done so much in the last month for him, but he had mood swings at the best and worst of times that would send the birds flying.

If the boy had known anything about the opposite sex, he would have compared Sasuke to a pregnant woman.

Ever since that day Sasuke-sensei had chocked him, Nanikato had been cautious around the older man. But even though he was wary, his fear of Sasuke seemed to make him all the more curious. He wanted to know why the raven haired man acted the way he did. The Uchiha seemed to hate him so much and yet would stare at him with haunted eyes, as though he had seen a ghost. The more unnerved Nanikato became, the more he wanted answers to his questions.

Impediments in their student-teacher relationship aside, he was learning at an incredible rate. Within the first week of being taught the three basic shinobi arts; Nanikato had mastered a small handful of basic genjutsu, ninjutsu and taijutsu. He was even working on the starting phase of a taijutsu style Orochimaru-sama had chosen for him.

The only thing he wasn't able to create was a Bunshin.

No matter how hard he tried, Nanikato was unable to produce a clone - the most he got was a silvery mist that wavered in front of him for a few moments before vanishing. Kabuto had told him during his last examination that his chakra coils prohibited the creation of a clone of any type.

`Its just a handicap I'll have to work around' he told himself. `Besides, not being about to produce a Bunshin has its upside - if Sasuke-sensei were to see more of me in one place, he'd go apocalyptic!'

The blonde sighed, walked silently down the long corridors of Otokage Tower.

He followed Orochimaru's orders and ignored the various shinobi that stopped to look at him. As the apprentice of Uchiha Sasuke and for other reasons he was not yet privy to, he was something of a legend here. The attention bothered him greatly, as he hated the feeling of everyone's eyes following him wherever he went.

Because of that, he could only stand being in the presence of Orochimaru, Kabuto and even creepy Sasuke-sensei for more then ten minutes.

At the moment, he was seeking out Kabuto-san. It was time for his next checkup and he wasn't going to be late. It didn't take him long to get there either, slipping into the laboratory/infirmary without being noticed by any of the young medics studying under the gray haired man. Their chatter was almost like the soft buzz of a colony of bees, soothing their patients into deep slumbers - it wasn't known as the Hidden Village of Sound for nothing.

He stopped at the door to Kabuto office.

“Kabuto-san?”

The older man, who was seated at a desk covered with papers, test tubes and beakers, filled all sorts of medical potions, looked up. He put down a folder that he had been reading and stood.

“Ah, so you've come for your appointment Nanikato-kun” he smiled.

“Yes sir”

“Good, good. This way”

He silently followed Kabuto into the back, slipping off his shoes off his feet as he climbed up on the examination bed. There was silence between the pair as Kabuto checked his heartbeat and did a diagnostic check of his chakra system.

The older man hummed to himself while he worked, checking the boy's eyes and throat and ears before giving a shot of some kind. They progressed to testing his intelligence and his pain response soon after. Once it was all done and over with, Nanikato crossed his arms.

“So what's the verdict?

Kabuto laughed. “You make it sound as if you're dying Nanikato”

The blonde shrugged.

“Well, your muscles are developing well as is your chakra reserves. For someone who's just begun training his or her body under such demands, you have come very far. In all my years, I have never seen a child progress at such a rate. But you do seem far more stressed then you were during your last checkup, though I guess that's to be expected with your training”

“Harrumph…” Nanikato snorted, looking away. “Its not the training - its Sasuke-sensei”

Kabuto raised an eyebrow. “Sasuke-kun you say? What has he done now?”

The boy stared at his feet, not bothering to look at the medic. “Its nothing…”

“Well its something, otherwise you wouldn't be behaving like this. So come now - out with it”

Nanikato sighed, raising his eyes to look the older man in the face.

“He hates me,” the blonde stated as bluntly as ever, tiredly. “No matter what I do or what I say, I always seem to be doing something wrong. He's always getting angry over the littlest thing and he won't give me a reason as the why. Two weeks ago he tried chocking me because I `dared' to mimic someone. I have no idea what he was talking about and when I asked, he left. He hasn't touched me since, but know when he's angry and that's almost the entire time we're together”

“Well Nanikato-kun, I can't tell much but I do know that there is a reason Sasuke's behavior”

“And that reason would be?”

Kabuto smirked at the hint of sarcasm that entered his voice.

“You look very much like an of a old friend of his”

“A friend?”

“Yes, a friend - his best friend in fact. When Sasuke was as old as you are now, he had a teammate that looked like you. You see, when he was eight years old, his older brother slaughtered their entire clan save him and so he pushed away people unconsciously in order to protect them. But his friend was a force of nature. That boy broke down almost all of Sasuke's barriers and had given him, for a while, a sense of comradeship he had never felt before. Unfortunately, the boy died in his arms just shy of a year after they became friends. I believe it crushed it him. Since you look like his friend, he must be lashing because he feels as though you are trying to usurp his friend's place. He knows that you aren't, but it's just a reflex. So I'll advice you not to ask him about it anymore - it's a sore subject for Sasuke-kun”

“Oh,” Nanikato shivered, the new insight on his sensei doing nothing to make him feel any better. “Okay. Very well”

Kabuto nodded and patted him on the back, shoeing his off the examination bed. “You're good for another two weeks. Now you have lessons with Sasuke in ten minutes and we both know he'll be cross if you're late. And remember, if you ever need someone to talk to, I'll be here”

The blonde nodded. “Sayonara Kabuto-san”

“Oyasuminasai Nanikato-kun”

-.ooOoo.-

He was surrounded in darkness.

It wasn't at all like comforting place he had come from, but rather is was overflowing with a mysterious energy that caused that the hair upon the back of his neck to rise in fear. He was frightened, but there was no turning back. There was nowhere to run and nowhere to hide.

Stepping forward, he began his decent into nothingness, afraid for life. A while ago, he wouldn't have cared if he were to be consumed. But he had seen too much and there were still too many things he had to learn before he could be taken away.

Where was he?

As he continued to walk through the darkness, it began to lighten into eerie shadows, following him like lost souls. Whispering to him.

“Nanikato…”

He turned. It was like the rustling of the fallen autumn lefts, dry yet smooth - a ghostly voice calling out to him.

“Who's there?”

Silence.

“Hello?”

There was a flicker of light up head, calling to him much like the whispery voice had.

“Nanikato…”

“What do you want?”

There was a paused, a rustling.

“Follow me…”

He followed it.

He followed the light down the darkened corridor, enthralled by its beauty. Entranced. It didn't matter where it took him because it could feel the urgency in the voice. It needed him. The light stopped then, shimmering before a large door.

It took form, becoming his double.

“Follow me Nanikato”

And then it vanished, walking through the door.

Nanikato awoke in a cold sweat. It was night now, though he had no idea for how long he had slept since he had headed in early after training with Sasuke-sensei. He felt clammy and chilled, yet his room was warm - too warm in fact. The heat was making him sick and he felt as though it was trying to smother the air out of his lungs.

Gasping, he struggled to escape the dampened, tangled sheets. Once released, the blonde slipped out of the bed and stumbled towards his bedroom window. Opening it, he stuck his face out, allowing the winds of coming winter to cool him off.

He breathed deep.

`It was only a dream…'

But it had felt so real. He shuddered, wrapping his arms around himself. He had never felt this way before. Unable to shake the feeling, he lifted himself up to the windowsill. One foot planted firmly, he turned and extended his other, channeling chakra into it and fixed it to the outer wall.

Unsteadily, Nanikato did the same with his other foot and began to scale the wall. He slipped a few time, as he hadn't totally mastered the tree climbing exercise just yet. But he had to get way. He couldn't stay in his room because it felt as though the walls were closing in him. He had to get out into the fresh air in order to breathe - to be free.

Once on the roof, he gazed out at the stars above Otogakure. They lit up the night like a gathering of fireflies. The village below was pretty much silent, most of the lights having been turned out. Finding solitude in the night, he began leaping from rooftop to roof - seeking out what could not be explained.

He found it a few minutes later, atop the tallest tower in the whole village. Sitting on the far side, Nanikato simply sat back and watched the stars. After awhile he began to get cold, but he ignored it and rather curled up, shutting his eyes and allowing the energy of the night sky to lull him back to sleep.

-.ooOoo.-

That was how Sasuke found him the next morning.

The raven hair man had grown impenitent when the boy had not arrived at the designated time for training. After waiting an hour, he sought out the boy's room, which was in the building running adjacent to Otokage Tower. But Nanikato had not been there.

Seeing the window wide open, Sasuke had decided the follow the `trail of breadcrumbs' to his missing student. Much to his shock, he found the boy fast asleep upon the roof of the lookout tower - favorite spot of retreat. The boy must have come here to watch the stars, much like Sasuke himself did nearly every night - last night being an exception.

But for what reason? Normally he only came here to be rid of painful memories. The boy had none of those, at least for now. As soon as he began training the boy to kill, there would be a reason for him wanting to seek out such a place.

The very thought caused the Uchiha to shiver.

It was also a surprise that the boy hadn't frozen to death during the night. Another similarity he had with Naruto. Looking back, Sasuke remembered that one winter when he was nine and Fire Country had played host to an unexpected blizzard. When Naruto hadn't shown up for class that morning, Iruka-sensei had become rather frustrated before becoming worried. When he left the classroom to find their deadlast, he had no idea that Sasuke and a few other boys had secretly followed him out into the cold.

What they had seen they had tried their best to forget, and many had succeeded.

Naruto had received a particularly harsh beating the night before from a group of drunk and angry villagers. They had left him to die in an ally next to his apartment building, allowing him to freeze. It had been thanks to snow falling off the roof to bury him that had saved his life. Insulated by the snow and with Kyuubi's healing powers to keep his heart beating, Naruto had survived the night. When Iruka had found him, the blonde had been on his way to becoming a human popsicle…

Sighing, he bent down and gently picked the boy and took his minuscule weight into his arm. It was then, as the small blonde instinctively burrowed closer into the warmth of Sasuke embrace, that the raven-haired man realized how innocent his young charge really was.

He may not have Naruto, but he was an innocent.

He brushed a lock of golden hair out of sleeping boy's face. “I am sorry” he whispered, thankful that boy and no one else could hear him. “You are his legacy and I have treated you as he was treated - treated for a reason he couldn't control. He many not have chosen to have what was done to him done, but it is done. Maybe you can help me fulfill his dreams…”

Sasuke turned and watched the rising sun for a moment before taking leap, allowing himself to fall.