Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Uncertainty ❯ Doubt ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: I dont own Naruto. Don't sue me.. But I can take Neji for myself ^_^.. Thank you Iris_chan for being my beta reader J

Chapter One: Doubt.

Pink... The cherry tree's petals were so pink at that time of year.
They were blooming everywhere, and everything had a tint of peach and
rouge.
Blue... It was a sunny day, and the clear-blue sky reflected on the
silver ripples of the lake.
Green... Flourishing trees, blooming flowers, emerald blades of grass...
everything was growing, and everything had the fresh feeling of spring.
Pink, blue, green... Those are the colours of pure, beautiful nature.

Sakura was sitting under the one of the blossoming cherry trees,
alone. Her team was on a mission again, and it had been a couple of
weeks since she last saw her Sasuke. Well, it wasn't the same team
anymore, since she wasn't a Chuunin like Sasuke and Naruto. She couldn't
go with them on every mission anymore. All because she couldn't pass
that damn exam. She was too weak, and the thought of being left alone
was driving her crazy.

She was now seventeen years old, and yet she was still just a
gennin. Tsunade had asked her to teach in the Academy, but she hadn't
made up her mind yet. She wanted to be as near to Sasuke as she could,
and teaching in the Academy wouldn't help at all. She still loved him
more than she loved herself, or anything else in the world, and she
couldn't wait to see him again. She knew he doesn't love her yet, but
that didn't discourage her in the least bit. He would love her someday;
she would do anything and everything in her power to make sure of it.
She didn't want to imagine her life without him. She just couldn't...

She was so absorbed in her thoughts that she didn't realize someone
had come and was sitting beside her. She looked over and saw Shikamaru;
she recognized him from Ino's team. He was the only one who became a
Chunnin during the first exam. She had known him for a very long time
now, and still didn't really know anything about him. She knew he was
smart and good with tactics and strategy, but that's it. It's so weird,
how you can spend so much time around people yet know so little about
them.

"What are you doing here, Sakura?" he asked her. He always treated her
as if they had been friends since childhood, and she liked that. It made
her feel comfortable around him.

"Just thinking," she answered, still looking at the gentle waves on the
lake. "And you?"

"I like clouds."

"What?" Raising an eyebrow, she looked over at him, only to find him
staring at the lake. 'Clouds? What clouds?'

"I look at the clouds when I'm here. It puts my mind at ease." He was
wondering why he was talking to her, and why he'd sat down beside her.
He didn't mind Sakura's presence; actually, he quite enjoyed talking
with her. She reminded him of Ino in some strange way, but it was nice
that she was also very different.

Sakura looked up at the bright, blue sky "But the sky is clear, I don't
see any clouds." She looked at Shikamaru again. He was now lying on the
soft grass, looking at the sky.

"There will be clouds, eventually." He closed his eyes for a moment.

Sakura let her eyes fall to the grass. She didn't know what to say
anymore. Suddenly, a thought crossed her mind. 'Maybe he wants to be
alone... but I was the first one here; it's my place, so why should I
leave?' She couldn't seem to make up her mind. Leave or stay... stay or
leave... Then something broke her thoughts.

"So what were you thinking about?" he asked, still staring wistfully up
at the sky. "You don't have to answer if you don't want to." He was just
trying to make conversation; he mustn't know what he had asked about.

"Oh, no, it's alright. I was just thinking about my team and wondering
when they'll be back," she answered sincerely.

"So, you were thinking about Sasuke." He didn't try to hide his smirk.
He had known what was on her mind since he first saw her sitting under
that tree. The dreamy look on her face had given it away immediately. He
had just wanted to hear it from her lips.

The pink-haired girl smiled to herself and blushed a bit. It was
obvious he knew. Everyone in the Hidden Leaf knew what she felt for the
Uchiha heir.

"Yes. I miss him." She closed her eyes and saw her beloved one in her
mind. His face was emotionless, as always, but his self-control was one
of the things she loved about him.

She jumped a bit as Shikamaru spoke, for she almost forgot he was
there.

"Do you think he misses you as well?"

Chills ran up and down her spine. She opened her eyes and looked
with annoyance at Shikamaru, whose eyes where still closed.

"What's that supposed to mean?!" she snapped. 'What's wrong with him?
What did he mean by that?'

"Nothing," he answered with a lazy drawl.

She didn't know if Sasuke missed her. Chances were he didn't even
care if she wasn't there...

No.. she didn't want to think like that.. But..

"I don't know". She didn't know Sasuke's feelings. Hot tears began
forming in her eyes. "I just don't know" Opening her eyes and looking at
the sky, she noticed that it was overcast. Shikamaru had been right; the
clouds could make someone peaceful and calm. She felt much better after
watching the white and grey puffs float across the sky.

"Do you love him?" he mumbled, not quite understanding why he wanted to
know.

"Of course I do." She was startled at his question, but of course didn't
hesitate when she gave the answer.

Shikamaru opened his eyes and looked up at her. Her confused look
conveyed something to the like of 'Where have you been all these years?'
What? He had just asked a simple question, hadn't he? 'Women... they are
so troublesome.'

"Have you ever loved someone, Shikamaru?" Immediately after she asked
the question, she regretted it. She hadn't meant to ask him something
like that, it had just come out. She knew it was improper to ask him
such question, and it embarrassed her greatly, but she felt very open
with him. Maybe it was because they were strangers who didn't know much
about each other. Maybe they could learn more about themselves by
talking to one another.

"It depends on what you mean by 'love.' I love my parents and..."

"That's not what I meant, and you know it. I was asking if you've ever
been in love with a girl. You know... a dating relationship." He was
quickly getting on her nerves. She knew he was playing with her and that
irritated her immensely.

"A girl? No, I've never loved a girl." He said it so matter-of-factly,
like it was obvious. But what about..?

"What about Ino?"

His brows furrowed in a frown at her question. "What about her?"
He didn't understand what Ino had to do with anything.

Sakura shrugged slightly. "I don't know, I guess I've just always
thought you had a crush on her."

"Ino is my friend and she has always been. Besides, we're talking about
love, not crushes. They're not the same." He didn't even know why he was
talking about his personal life with her. Then it hit him; she had the
same effect on him as the clouds. She made him feel at peace.

"So you really haven't loved any girl, ever? That's horrible!!" she
shouted out loud.

"And why is that?" He asked with a confused look, not liking the way
this conversation was turning out. It was supposed to be a nice and
pleasant talk, it wasn't supposed to get serious and personal.

"You just don't know what you're missing," she answered hastily.

"Heartbreaks, false hope, and annoying girls who..."

"No!" she interrupted loudly. "Well, you have a few things right. Love's
not always easy and pleasant, but love is the most beautiful thing you
could ever experience in your whole life. When you love someone, you
feel so happy and joyful that it makes you want to smile at everyone.
You also want to take care of that person and..."

"Stop! You're talking about it like you know how it's like." He could
feel anger suddenly burst inside of him. What right did she have to
lecture him on something she didn't know about in the first place?

"I do," she stated simply.

"Are you really sure about that?"

Tucking a stray strand of pink hair behind her ear, she smiled.
"Yes, I am"

"Then you're wrong. Love can only be something special when it is
requited." He then glanced back up at the sky and stood quickly. "It's
going to rain. Go home, Sakura." And with that, he left.

She stared after him, watching him walk away. What was she supposed
to think? He had so utterly confused her. 'Have you really never fallen
for someone, Shikamaru?' Then she unwillingly remembered his words.
'Love can only be something special when it is requited.' Is that all
she had been feeling over the years? Unrequited love? Tears pooled in
her eyes and mixed with the clear droplets of rain that had begun to
fall from the sky.

"Sasuke..."

.tbc.