Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ When Hearts Break (Sequal to Kakashi My Koibito) ❯ Chapter 1

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Kakashi and I had been together for a little over a year. Every second of it was wonderful. We never had a true argument, never wished to see someone else, never even said anything mean to eachother. To keep things romantic we'd go on a date atleast once a week. Twice if he was having a good week. Ofcourse, we made love too. To be honest, that was one of the best things about our relationship. Each experience was new... and it felt like the first time every time. I could see his love for me and feel it through my whole body. I knew that we'd always love eachother.

I remember clearly what happened before he was sent on one of his toughest missions. We hadn't had sex in about a month... I just didn't feel like it. I couldn't explain why... because I wanted to... but for some reason I didn't at the same time. I was starting to feel weaker too. Every smell, every sound, every touch was sending me swirling into an endless sea of nausea. Even my breasts were starting to hurt. I knew I was either really sick... or there was something else going on. I didn't want to say anything to Kakashi. I had a feeling I knew what it was, but I wasn't sure.

When I was late for my period, I went to see the doctor. He checked me for all signs of an illness, but found none. He took a few samples of blood and vaginal discharge and told me he'd know within a day.

"It is most likely that you are pregnant, but we'll know for sure," he told me.

"That's what I thought."

I walked back to Kakashi's place. I had been staying there as well as my own, however I had been here more. I walked into his room and saw him packing a few things. I looked at him curiously, taking a deep breath.

"Y... You're leaving?"

It amazed me how sad I sounded. He faced me with a mixture of sadness, and excitedness in his exposed eye.

"Yes. The Kage has assigned me to a mission. He said it was really important and dangerous. I have to leave by nightfall."

My mouth hung open and my eyes watered. I didn't want to believe what I was hearing.

"How long will you be gone?"

"I dunno. It's possible I will be gone as long as a year.... or I'll never come back."

"Kakashi-domo... you cannot go. Please don't go."

"Look I know.... I'm really going to miss you too Kiari. It's going to be hard for both of us, but... I miss the thrill of a good mission."

"You can't leave Kakashi.... not now... please. Please!"

My tears were streaming down my face non-stop at this point.

"I can't just not go Kiari! It is my job... my life. Do you know what would happen to me if I decided not to go on this mission? I could lose my position. I could end up working for the ninja like you instead of actually being one."

"Kakashi... I didn't get my job by slacking off! I failed at the Acadamy. All my chances of becoming a Ninja ended right there. I did not have the skill nor the knowledge required. To be where I am now is actually a blessing to me. You once told me I had the most important job in this village. Was that just a lie? Do you really think of my position so low?"

"That is not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean 'cause it sounded like a direct attack at me."

"Look, I can't just drop every one of my dreams and screw up my plans for life for you! You knew that I would have to go on a mission like this some day! You knew that I would have to leave you every now and then! Don't make such a big deal about something you signed on for! Do you expect me to have nothing just for you?"

I fell to my knees and sobbed, unable to form words around my tears. I felt like I'd be sick.

"Look... I just can't do it Kiari. I'm leaving tonight end of story. Just sit in your damn tree and wait for me."

He picked up his bag and closed it.

"P-please... Kakashi.... for the love of god.... don't leave.... tonight.... please....wait until tomorrow atleast.... please...."

"I can't."

With that he left me there crying on the ground. Left me in his house to cry until I could bring myself to move again. I think it was midnight when I got up. As I said before, I felt sick and when I stood up I coughed up blood from crying so much so long. The blood splatterd all over the floor and I didn't stick around to clean it up. I ran all the way to my place and stayed up by the fire all night long thinking of all the wonderful times Kakashi and I had together. Every date, every kiss, every time we made love.... every sentimental thing he said to me....

I didn't want to accept us being over. I hoped we would work it out when he returned, but something inside told me that I shouldn't keep my hopes too high.

After the sun had been up for several long hours the doctor came to my door. I didn't answer when he knocked so he walked in on his own to see if I was there.

"Kiari? You alright?"

"I dunno."

"I heard Kakashi was sent on a mission."

I nodded.

"Ah. Well, I have some news. Maybe it might cheer you up."

I looked at him.

"You are pregnant. You and Kakashi are having a child."

I smirked, but still retained a somber expression.

"If Kakashi will even want to have anything to do with me when he returns."

"If there is anything I do know about you two.... it's that Kakashi loves you very much. He could never not love you."

"Thank you doctor."

He left. All I could think about was how I could not possibly refuse food, water, or to live. I needed this baby. I needed to have something to keep Kakashi close to my heart if it was really over. I knew that I'd see Kakashi in the child. I felt that Kakashi wouldn't leave me if I had his child. I hoped that would not the be only reason he'd stay. I put my hand on my stomach.

"If I cannot give you a daddy, I promise I will give you the life you want."

And so I made myself a hot breakfast. However that same day I took leave from my duties. I told the Kage that I was pregnant and even though I was capable of working, I wouldn't be capable for long and I was emotionally unstable to do any work. He apologised to me for assigning Kakashi to the mission, and explained that he was the only one who had the right qualifications to take it on. I understood, but I wished it were different. I wished there were more Ninja as good as Kakashi.

"I wish I never failed," is what I said outloud instead.

The Kage just looked at me. I turned and left.

For eight months I talked to no one. I didn't hang out with my old friends and I didn't leave my house except for exercise. No one knew what to think of me. I didn't really know what to think of myself. The only people who had any interaction with me were the Kage and the doctor. All I knew was that I wanted to be a good mother to my baby. It was the worst time of my life... dealing with life without Kakashi after he's expressed his love for me. I had waited 19 years for that to happen. During those years I didn't have to deal with anything except wondering if I'd ever get the chance to tell Kakashi how I felt. This time... I wondered if he'd ever want to be near me again.

I didn't go anywhere near the bridge, nor attempt to climb my old tree. I didn't see a point. Why be the stalker I once was? Why should I attempt to revive something I wasn't sure would live again?

The day he returned I was standing up to my ankles in the river, far away from the village, contemplating what I was gonna do with my future. I was almost 9 months pregnant now. My stomach was protruding, but I was still thin everywhere else. I heard rapid movement coming towards me. I panicked, fearing that I was too far from the village to be helped if something were to happen to me. I reached into my kimono and pulled out two Kunai. Holding one in each hand, I turned and prepared to attack.

However... I did not. I saw Kakashi walking towards me. I dropped my arms and stared, unable to do much more. He looked so scared... worried... and somewhat relieved. He stopped at the water's edge and looked at me.

"I saw the blood on the floor," he said. "It scared the shit out of me... I assumed the worst."

Again I couldn't say anything, but my heart was pounding.

"Kiari-domo I am so so sorry. I didn't mean anything I said. Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?"

A single tear escaped through my eyes and I smiled weakly. "Ofcourse I can forgive you koibito."

He smiled under his turtleneck and started running into the water towards me. I opened my arms to him and we embraced in the middle of the river. We were both crying into one another's shoulders.

"I'm sorry," he kept whispering. "I'll never leave you again."

I pulled back a bit and pulled his turtle neck away from his face and kissed him so passionately I didn't care about breathing anymore. I just needed to feel his tongue caressing my own. I needed to feel his love again. He pulled away once oxygen became a terrible necessity. He held my hand and we walked back to the bank.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He said, putting a hand on my stomach. "I would have stayed if I'd have known."

"I wanted to tell you.... but I wasn't sure yet. I didn't find out until the next day. I wanted to tell you when I knew."

"Kiari-koi... you can tell me anything whether you are sure or not. I feel terrible leaving you to deal with this by yourself."

"Don't... I forgive you."

He kissed me again.

"By the way..." He grabed the Kunai from my hands... I'd forgotten to drop them. "Isn't it supposed to be against code for you to be carrying these?"

I shook my head.

"Not anymore."

I pulled out a peice of paper from my pocket from the Kage.

"You... re-took your exams? And the final test?!"

"Yes."

"But... the baby...."

"I wasn't far enough along for it to do any damage. Besides... the doctor said it was good for me. I'm a ninja now. I wont be taking on missions any time soon, but I can. I'm qualified to go with you."

He smiled at me. His smile melted my heart and brought me a peace I hadn't felt in a long time.

"You did this for me?"

"Yes I did."

"Well... I've gotta say, that has to be one of the more interesting things you've ever done. However... I know a better way to prove I love you than to become a Ninja so you can follow me."

"........"

He got on his knees and took a ring out of his pocket. I gasped as he extended it towards me.

"Will you marry me Kiari-domo?"

"YES!"

He smiled and slipped the ring around my finger. I pulled him up and kissed him.

Two weeks later I went into labor. For 7 1/2 hours I dealt with agonizing pain. When it was all said and done I gave birth to our son, Kiashi. I had never seen Kakashi happier.

Six weeks after that we were married. I wouldn't trade what happened to us for anything. I wouldn't have it any other way neither. He never failed to let me know he loved me for one second. He never let me doubt his feelings. He never left for a mission unless I was allowed to go too. If things were any better between us, we'd be a fairy tale.

THE END