Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ WTF!!! The Rokudaime's Pregnant?! ❯ WTF!!! The Rokudaime's Pregnant?! ( Chapter 9 )

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(Naruto casts glares menacingly…)

 

Chapter 9 Birthing Class

by: c7bi_kyuubi

 

 

 

Previous chapter

 

“OI JIICHAN! FIVE BOWLS OF RAMEN! DIFFERENT FLAVOURS EACH! WHOOHOO RAMEN!! RAMEN! RAMEN!” Naruto happily yelled bouncing eagerly in his seat. Sasuke had to smile at that as he watched his cute kitsune talk with Ayame and the chef. `Why did I fall for the number one most hyperactive, annoying (sometimes), loud, obnoxious, extremely surprising and ramen obsessed ninja who happens to be the only Hokage that got pregnant as a male in Konoha history? Not that I'm complaining… He's kinda cute, adorable… cuddly… hmm…'

 

Ayame stifled a giggle and her smile at Sasuke's star struck expression of devoted love towards the oblivious and currently shoveling ramen down his throat Rokudaime Hokage, Uzumaki Naruto. “Ne, otousan, they make an interestingly funny couple don't they?” She whispered to her father who laughed out loud. “Why yes, I guess they do!” They stared at the two as Naruto tried to shove some ramen into Sasuke's mouth and soon the two were a blur as Sasuke dodged Naruto's chopsticks…

 

Ahh… Konoha is always so lively ne? BWAHAHAHAHA!!! NYAHAHAHAHA!!!

 

End Previous Chapter

 

 

 

 

Naruto and Sasuke were in a hospital room with Tsunade and Sakura who was checking up on the very pregnant Naruto. Naruto was currently lying on his back on an examination bed with pillows propping him up. Sasuke was standing behind him and to the side, parallel to Naruto's head.

 

Since Naruto is in his 7th month of pregnancy now, Sakura suggested to Sasuke that they go to a birthing class to prepare them, especially Naruto, for the upcoming births. And as for Sasuke, he should learn not to panic as some father-to-be does frequently. Sasuke of course scoffed at the idea that he would panic when Naruto is in labor. “Uchihas never panic. It is not in their nature to panic. Uchihas are cool, calm and collected at all times. Uchihas think clearly and do NOT panic even if aliens attack and everyone is dying in mutilated ways around them. Uchihas nev-” Sasuke was cut off in his rant as Naruto bopped him on the head.

 

Naruto turned his puppy dog eyes at Sasuke, “I wanna go. I'm scared…” Sasuke puffed himself up and patted Naruto's shoulder consolingly. “Don't worry. I'll be there when you are going to give birth. I'll give you tips then…” Naruto's eyes immediately turned red in anger and glowed menacingly. “AND WHAT DO YOU KNOW OF PREGNANCY YOU STUPID ICE PRICK?!?!”

 

“Well, I'm a genius if you don't remember…” Sasuke smirked but that was immediately wiped away as Naruto grab a fistful of Sasuke's collar and drag him down until they were nose to nose. The red glow in Naruto's eyes increased and he growled, “Oh really, genius? How about you get pregnant and then tell me on how to give birth huh? Bastard? What do you think about that idea huh?! When the babies are in your stomach ready to burst out and with all the kicking and punching inside when you are carrying them for a whole goddamn freakin' nine months!!! And then, when YOU'RE in labor, YOU can tell me what's it like with labor pains which I can tell are painful as hell as with me carrying four of your kits in me, don't you dare try and tell me you'll teach me to give birth to them and try to give me tips. You get me?” Naruto growled out the last part.

 

Silently, Sasuke nodded. “Good.” Naruto chirped, the darkness and the red glowing eyes disappeared and he returned to his chipper happy self with bright blue eyes and a big smile. “Ne, when is the class anyway? Can you sign us up for it? Sasuke's coming too aren't you?” At the last sentence, the darkness with thunder and lightning storming and flashing behind him and the red glowing eyes came back, glaring at Sasuke who gulped nervously and nodded curtly. “Yea!!!” Naruto cried out happily clapping his hands together.

 

Sasuke sighed forlornly. He could feel his balls being crushed by a five ton monster truck and fried to a crisp and thrown into the Northern wind. `Bye bye balls… (sob)' he thought. Tsunade and Sakura stifled a laughing fit behind their hands. When the couple poofed away, with Sasuke carrying Naruto as Naruto was too big to walk long distance, they made plans to a big bet that Sasuke will be at a birthing class. They announce the bet to all the chunnins, Jounins and ANBUs at the common ninja lounge.

 

Most of the ninjas were skeptical that the last Uchiha who was frigid would actually go to a birthing class. So all bet against Sasuke actually be present at the birthing class. Only Iruka, Kakashi and the rest of rookie 9, who were now all Jounins except for Neji and Shikamaru who were ANBU captains, bet for Sasuke to be at the class. When the day of the birthing class came, the class instructor were surprised to find so many ninjas present, hanging on the roof and lounging around in the shadows or in plain sight. The moment Sasuke walked in with Naruto, profanities burst forward like a broken dam. Needless to say, Iruka, Kakashi and the rest of rookie 9 that were in the bet together with Tsunade and Sakura made a fortune that day.

 

 

 

 

 

During the birthing class, the instructor gave them all a fake plastic baby to practice on for stuff like changing diapers and giving mini baths. During the changing diapers moment, Sasuke broke off the baby's legs and sent his fist into the baby's stomach, crushing it instantly. He sweatdropped. “No way…” He said staring at the fake baby impaled on his fist. The class backed away cautiously and the instructor paled, staring at the fake baby.

 

Naruto immediately laughed at him before realizing that Sasuke just might have killed one of their children if that baby was real, then he started to cry. Sasuke was frantically trying to calm Naruto down and trying to remove to mangled baby from his hand. Giving fruitless tugs, he promptly Chidori-ed the remains, which also immediately send Naruto into louder sobs and crying a waterfall's worth of tears.

 

“You just killed one of our babies!!! WAHHHH!!! I HATE YOU!!! MURDERER!!! WAHHHHHH!!!!”

 

“Naruto, this isn't real… See? It's fake!” Sasuke said grabbing another spare baby doll and broke its head away from the body. The rest of the class backed away further from the couple with a larger sweatdrop. When Naruto started to cry harder, he concluded that maybe it wasn't the best course of action. “Naruto please stop crying? I'll treat you to ramen later `k?” Sasuke said, hugging Naruto close to him.

 

Naruto wailed once more but eventually quieted down sobbing on Sasuke's shoulder. “You promise not to kill out babies?” Sasuke nodded. “That's why were here aren't we? To learn so we don't kill our babies…” Naruto sniffled before giving Sasuke a gentle nudge on his chest. “That would be you only who managed to kill two `babies' in this class under one minute.”

 

“Told you I was a genius right?” Sasuke joked, wiping away the tear marks on Naruto's cheeks. Then he shot a cold glare at the instructor that said, `Continue now or else…' The instructor shivered and understood. Sometimes one wonders if the Sharingan can be use for telepathy…

 

It took almost twenty `babies' for Sasuke to get it right. Seven `babies' for him to perfect his changing diapers skill without mangling a baby, ten for him to manage to get the `baby' into various articles of clothing without dusting the `baby' or set it on fire with Katon Goukakyu no Jutsu or just plainly Chidori-ing it out of frustration and three for him to perfect his baby bathing skills without destroying or drowning the baby. Then the instructor gave them a preview of how a birth looks like. Sasuke concluded that giving birth is a lot more disgusting and painful and a hell lot more dangerous looking than any S-rank mission he had ever been on. Then he had to comfort Naruto who was completely freaked out over the video.

 

Then came the breathing exercise to giving birth and keeping calm. The instructor then gave out tips on the birthing process and labor pains and what to do when the water breaks. Sasuke left the class looking green and it did not help that the whole community of ninjas were waiting outside for them and laughed at his expression. He felt better after setting a few on fire and scattering the rest away. Naruto left the class happy and reassured and confident on what to expect and what to do when the times comes.

 

All in all it turned out alright for Naruto at least. Sasuke spent the rest of the day trying to seal off the memories and deluding himself that what he saw was not real in any way. The ninjas and kunoichis didn't help in anyway when he went to the Jounin lounge. Genma and Raidou were mimicking screams of pain and making grotesque faces as a payback of losing the bet earlier in the day. Anko, Kurenai and Shizune explained and described the birthing process (on Shizune's part as she helped deliver babies before) in extreme detail and made all the suppressed memories resurface.

 

When Sasuke finally snapped, he walked out of the Jounin lounge alone and smirking, leaving a bunch of twitching bodies groaning in pain behind.

 

“N-Nah… We s-hould (whimper in pain) have re-remembered not to (groan) piss of an already pissed Uchiha…” Anko muttered. The rest groaned back in agreement.

 

 

 

 

And so! The end of this chapter! Review please!!! Arigatou gozaimasu…