Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction ❯ The Adventures of Jusenkyo Man: All About Eva ❯ Chapter X ( Chapter 10 )

The Adventures of Jusenkyo Man:

All About Eva

By Lord Raa

Chapter X

Disclaim-me-do: "Let them eat cake." But if anybody touches mine, there will be bloodshed. I'm deadly serious, for I have Golden Syrup cake in the cupboard.

Brushing past Asuka's guardian with a smirk on his face, Gendo felt confident that should the disgruntled double agent act against him, Rei would intervene. That would bring in his son, in order to ensure that Rei remained safe. Then if anything were to happen to Shinji as a result of Kaji's actions, Misato would cut the man's heart out with a spoon.

`A bit long winded and messy for my tastes, but then I'd probably be dead,' he thought.

Realising just where that thought was taking him, he assumed that his cranial pain was to blame for his aberrant behaviour and shut his eyes tightly in an unsuccessful attempt to force the pain from his skull, before continuing his journey to the infirmary.

Since Shinji had started to exert his strange new influence on the female population at large, he'd been suffering from increasingly frequent headaches. He thought that since he was in "that neck of the woods" to get some more painkillers, he might as well pay his son a visit.

Reaching the door to the room where his son was recovering, the commander of NERV was only mildly surprised to see the Third Child's older admirers standing outside.

"What are you doing here?" he asked. "Don't you have work to do?"

"I needed to check that Shinji's foot was healing correctly," Ritsuko answered.

"I see. And you Captain Katsuragi?"

"I was discussing potential battle plans with Shinji."

"Yes, I recall that during the last few Angel attacks Shinji took the initiative and brought us victory. Perhaps I should make him Chief of Tactical Operations," Gendo mused.

"That would result in Shinji-kun being in fewer situations where he is risking his life," Rei pointed out, having emerged from Shinji's room.

The other women vying for Shinji's love that were present nodded in approval at that assessment.

"I was being sarcastic," Gendo ground out. "I still need Shinji to pilot Unit 01. Asuka lacks combat experience. Even with Rei in the Prototype backing her up, she embarrassed us."

Asuka overheard this and frowned. `How was I supposed to know that the damn thing would split in two? None of the Angels have been like the last.'

"Continue with your preparations for defeating this Angel," Gendo ordered before striding off in his arrogant manner. The attitude of the "We Love Shinji Club" was causing him to lose any concern he had for the Third Child.

Later that day, the "Old Hags" (as some referred to them as) were discussing the latest suggestions about how to defeat the regenerating Angel.

Misato was reluctant to accept Kaji's help on principle.

"Look, Misato, I know you don't like Kaji much. I like to think that I'm easy going when it comes to people and I think he's obnoxious," Ritsuko tried to explain to her old friend. "Especially when compared to Shinji."

"No one compares to Shinji," Misato pointed out.

Ritsuko sighed, but it was unclear whether it was in exasperation or agreement.

"Look Misato, this is what the Magi thought about Kaji's plan." The bottle blonde handed her colleague a print out with an analysis on it.

Captain Katsuragi shrugged, but accepted the greater odds of success when the super computers factored in Kaji's expansion of Shinji's idea.

The women were a little reluctant to acknowledge that Kaji's suggestion actually had the details to make it work. But that was because of their old acquaintance's recent behaviour.

"All right, Ritsu, I'll get it sorted between. It looks like Asuka will be moving in with me and Rei."

"What about Shinji?"

"I guess that Asuka will take Shinji's room and Shinji will have to move into mine," Misato "innocently" suggested.

Ritsuko gave her opinion on that idea. "No, I don't think so, Misato."

Misato glared at the lab coat clad woman. "Oh? And why not, Miss Infallible Reasoning?"

"Because: 1) it's most improper; 2) you'll have your hands full with training Rei and Asuka and 3) I'm much better suited to help with Shinji's physiotherapy," Ritsuko answered smugly.

Misato glared daggers look at her "old friend". But before she could scream at the injustice of having her hands full with training two pilots and Ritsuko having her hands full of Shinji, Rei walked into the room.

"I am here to see what plans have been devised to defeat the Angel," the blue haired girl explained the purpose of her visit.

"We are looking at the suggestion from Kaji," Ritsuko explained. "We're going to have you and Asuka commit to a dual attack on the Angel. You will need to be in perfect synchronisation or the plan will fail."

"I see," Rei nodded slightly. "How will we train?"

"By using this dancing game." Misato handed a manual to Rei.

"I shall endeavour to use this training to full effect," Rei said as she flicked through the booklet. "I want Shinji-kun to enjoy his picnic with me when he is out of the hospital."

Misato didn't like the sound of that one bit. Neither did Ritsuko.

"I'm sorry, but as Shinji's doctor, I get final say on when he leaves the hospital."

Rei faced the scientist. "You are not a medical doctor, Dr. Akagi. I do not think that you have the authority to make that decision."

Misato smiled as she realised that Ritsuko would no longer have an excuse to examine Shinji so thoroughly.

`Ritsuko's too rough with my Shin-chan,' the Captain mused. "I have to go right now. Rei, I'll catch you and Asuka at my apartment. We'll set everything up after dinner at 7.00. Ok?"

Rei gave the woman a nod of acknowledgement.

Misato knocked on the door to Shinji's recovery room.

"Shinji, are you awake?" she asked.

`Are you dressed?' she asked herself, not being averse to catching an eyeful of Shinji's naked flesh.

"I'm awake, Misato-san. You can come in," Shinji answered.

Misato opened the door and stepped in, smiling at her injured roommate.

"Is something up, Misato-san?" Shinji asked.

"Shin-chan, I need to tell you about the new sleeping arrangements in our apartment," Misato said gently, slipping into the visitor's chair at the side of the bed.

This gave Shinji the nasty feeling that he was going to get bad news. It was one he was familiar with after a number of years of neglect and indifference from his guardians.

"I see," Shinji sighed. "You want me to leave."

"What?" Misato asked, nearly falling off her seat. "I don't want you to leave, Shinji. What gave you that idea?"

"It's the way you said there was going to be new sleeping arrangements," Shinji responded, still unsure of what was going to happen.

"Well, the thing is," Misato started, taking Shinji's hands in hers, "Asuka needs to be in close proximity with Rei to train to operate in tandem. That means she needs a room next to Rei's."

"But, what about me?" Shinji asked, knowing that the defeat of the Angels came above all else. Even the little bit of happiness he so desperately sought.

"Well, technically, you get a bigger room," Misato answered with a cheeky grin. "You're moving into my room."

"But what about you, Misato san?" Shinji asked, aghast that he'd be putting his friend through so much inconvenience.

"I'll still be there, Shin-chan," Misato replied. "Keeping your bed nice and warm."

"But that's…" Shinji started, a blush colouring his cheeks.

"Absolutely unacceptable behaviour," a furious voice finished.

Shinji and Misato turned to face the seething Gendo Ikari.

"Father!" Shinji called out. He was surprised that the emotionally closed off man would visit him now as he hadn't bothered before.

"Commander, what are you doing here?" Misato asked

Gendo had been suffering from an incapacitating headache of near biblical proportions. Not wanting to be out of the loop with regards to the situation at SEELE, he'd simply taken a large dose of the painkillers he kept in his desk and when that had failed to dull the pain, he decided that alcohol would help.

It did, but that also meant that he was unable to react to any incoming information about who would be the new head of SEELE.

As a precaution, he'd made an appointment to see the chief medical officer in NERV.

"A word in private, Captain," Gendo responded, still not giving anything away.

Misato grimaced; it did not look good for her.

Outside Shinji's room, Gendo failed to fully explain the purpose of his visit.

"Shinji stays in the hospital until the Angel is defeated. If the Angel is stopped with minimal damage to the Evangelion Units and the surrounding area, then I'll allow Shinji to move back in with you."

Misato nearly responded with the question, "Who died and made you the person responsible for Shinji?"

The fact that a small voice in her head (one that was normally drowned out by alcohol) explained that Shinji's father was her boss and that he was standing in front of her prevented such a tactical blunder.

"Sir," Misato saluted and left to pick up the equipment for the training.

Gendo smiled, ever so slightly before entering the hospital room his son was now being forced to stay in.

"Shinji," he began ominously.

"Father," Shinji still couldn't face his parent. "Is there something I can do for you?"

"I have a need for you to get yourself to combat-ready status. I want to use you as a back up plan in case Katsuragi's fails. Do you understand?"

"Yes," Shinji answered meekly.

"Good." Gendo turned to leave. "Get well soon, son," he added in a quiet voice.

Shinji smiled, ever so slightly at that message of good will from his father, the first since he was four years old.

"I will father."

But by then, Gendo was down the corridor.

Ten minutes later, NERV's commander in Japan was sitting in one of the examination rooms in the NERV medical facility. The bespectacled man was discussing his malady with the grey-haired, male, duty doctor.

"It feels like my neurons are being disconnected and reconnected one at a time, like a 1950's telephone exchange. I could take a fistful of painkillers and wash them down with whiskey, but with my responsibilities…" he trailed off.

"I understand," Doctor Keiichi Murata nodded. "I won't lie to you, it could be a number of things: - aneurysm; stroke; tumour or head injury. Plus there are the psychological factors. You mentioned your responsibilities so I can't rule out a stress related condition."

Gendo internally frowned at this. `I do not need this complication. But I suppose that there could be worse times for this to occur.'

"But, again, YOU just can't take three weeks off on holiday," the balding doctor continued.

"That's why I'm here now and not when I've collapsed, Doctor," Gendo pointed out, his voice heavy with a mixture of sarcasm and fatigue.

Dr. Murata knew from experience that Gendo Ikari was not the easiest of people to get along with at the best of times and so took the attitude in his stride. "Let's get this started, shall we? I'll call and get them to set up the scans this evening. I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to put you on nil by mouth for the time being."

Gendo grudgingly agreed with a curt nod.

#

Asuka was unimpressed with the outfit Misato was forcing her and Rei to wear for their training. The red haired pilot was stunned that her commanding officer would say something as scandalous as "I bet Shin-chan's ass would look really cute in those tight shorts" just before leaving to prepare herself a cup of coffee.

But what really unsettled her was the follow up comment from the quiet girl.

"Does this choice of clothing cause my buttocks appear large?"

Asuka blinked at the oddly timed question. Normally you would expect women to ask that question when shopping for clothes, not when they are about to train for a life or death mission with a dancing game.

"No, why? Asuka asked impatiently.

"According to my research, some men find women in form fitting clothing sexually attractive. The idea of wearing a tight Lycra outfit without underwear while visiting Shinji-kun makes my nipples tingle," Rei admitted. "It is a pleasant sensation."

Asuka shook her head in sad disbelief. "I'm surrounded by freaks."

"Right," Misato re-entered the living room with a cup of coffee in her hand, "shall we begin?"

Asuka strode and claimed the dance-mat that was closest to the window, while Rei moved slowly, but gracefully to the other.

Donning their headphones, the two pilots started to follow the sequence of lights and bleeps.

Only to fall out of step after a mere thirteen seconds.

It took a tremendous amount of Misato's willpower not to laugh at the poor girls, who now lay on the floor tangled in a heap.

"That's not helping us Misato," Asuka grumbled when she saw the look on the Captain's face.

"You're right, Asuka. Now get up and start again."

As the pilots stood back up and prepared to begin again, Misato reminded them why they needed to be perfect with this. "Even if we're not all destroyed by this Angel, my life won't be worth living without Shinji."

Asuka shook her head at the woman with the schoolgirl crush on her fellow pilot. Not that her feelings for Kaji were like that, you understand. They were heartfelt, honest and noble. Even if Kaji never seemed to reciprocate them.

"I am fully aware of the implications of failure," Rei replied coolly. "I have scheduled a date with Shinji-kun, Captain Katsuragi."

`We'll see about that, you icy bitch,' Misato thought darkly. "Yes, well you understand why you need to get this right. So hop to it, children."

#¬

At that time, while the two active Evangelion pilots were humiliating themselves in front of NERV's tactical officer, Shinji was slowly becoming bored with his current situation in the recuperation ward.

It was not because he had no one to talk to, but rather nothing to do. In the past, he would normally have done his homework, practiced his cello or more recently, cleaned Misato's apartment.

He sighed, thinking about what he thought he heard his father say during his flying visit earlier. The comforting words were being replayed in his mind, though he had a feeling that Gendo had an ulterior motive for saying them. And that was completely discounting the bit he said about him being the back up for the main battle plan against the regenerating Angel.

But that cynical opinion didn't sit quite right with Shinji. Yes, his father had summoned him to Tokyo-3 out of the blue to risk his life, but since he'd been wrong about Dr. Akagi being some kind of pervert and not a genuinely lonely person like he was, perhaps Gendo now wanted to be part of a family again.

That conclusion was completely unfounded, but it made Shinji feel a little bit better nonetheless.

But that still didn't solve his problem of being bored out of his skull. Deciding that despite the ceiling becoming familiar, he needed to get out of the room.

Shinji extricated himself from the sling that held his foot and swung his legs off the edge of his bed. He then took a deep breath to brace himself for the expected agony of putting his weight on the injured limb before opting to hop to a nearby pair of crutches using his good leg.

Feeling a little guilty at first for leaving his room without a doctor's approval, Shinji reconciled that with the fact that he needed to relieve himself and that by doing this, he was following his father's instructions to get in a vaguely combat ready status.

Or he hoped that he would be able to say that if he was questioned by anybody that stopped him.

As Shinji set off, he was unaware that his hospital gown was open at the back, allowing all that followed him a free view of Misato's favourite squeeze toy.

#

As Shinji hobbled down the corridor, Kaji spotted the injured teen. There was still something about the pilot that the secret agent disliked; it was just incredibly hard to put his finger on.

Kaji was tempted to pull a mean-spirited and childish prank on Shinji, but before he could properly weigh up the pros and cons of such immature actions, Maya Ibuki walked up to the unofficial Mr. Tokyo-3.

The title was not recognised by the authorities only because the contest didn't exist. Not that any of the women of NERV would ever vote for another man.

"Hello Shinji-kun," Dr. Akagi's assistant greeted with a smile.

"Oh, hello, Ibuki-san," Shinji bowed slightly because of his position.

"Why are you out of your room like this?" she asked, concerned that the young man might hurt himself further.

"I need to…" Shinji blushed as he tried to best word the purpose of his journey.

"Need to what?" Maya asked, now concerned that Shinji's reddening face was a new problem.

"Go to the toilet," Shinji admitted, hanging is head in embarrassment.

"Don't you have a bed-pan in your room?" Maya asked as she stepped closer to wounded pilot. "Oh, I see, you must be ever so bored on your own in there. I'm sorry that I haven't been able to visit you. Let me make it up to you. I'll help you to the restrooms."

The short-haired woman smiled to herself as she slipped an arm around Shinji's waist and noticed his lack of undergarments.

`Not that he'll be needing those at the end of our dates,' Maya though saucily.

Shinji blushed heavily at the close contact with the "Bridge Bunny".

"I don't want to be a bother to you, Miss Ibuki. I'm sure that I'm keeping you from your work."

"Don't be silly Shinji-kun," Maya smiled at the boy. "And you can call me Maya."

"Ok, Maya-san," Shinji reluctantly agreed.

"Shinji, I know that you must be bored in that room, but I really think that you should be in a wheelchair. You don't want to risk doing your body more harm then good," Maya expressed her disapproval at Shinji's actions.

"But I really need to go to the toilet." Shinji emphasised his need by crossing his legs as best he could.

"I'll help you, Shinji-kun."

Maya aided Shinji trip to the toilet but was stopped from going in by Gendo.

"Lieutenant Ibuki, I sincerely hope that you were not planning on following my son into the men's room."

"I was just helping Shinji-kun to the toilet," Maya said, intimidated by the Commander's gaze.

"I'll take it from here," Gendo told the young woman.

Kaji continued to silently observe the unfolding situation. He was unaware of a reason for the unpopular Ikari to be in the medical area.

`Rei is with Misato,' he recalled, `so why is he here?'

#

Back at the Katsuragi apartment, the Captain decided that it was time to break for a quick snack.

"I'm sorry that I've not got much to choose from, but you can fight over the instant ramen," Misato explained, handing the tired trainee dancers a bag from the local convenience store.

"What about you?" Asuka grumbled angrily.

"I've got some leftovers from the last meal Shinji cooked here," Misato answered smugly.

"You mean that you get home-cooking while we have plastic noodles?" Asuka yelled at her room-mate.

"Judging by your performance tonight, you're lucky I'm feeding you at all. And I though that you were supposed to be the best, Asuka," Misato shot back.

"It's not me, it's her!" Asuka pointed at Rei.

"Do not blame me for your incompetence, Pilot Sohryu. Several of the mistakes made were yours," Rei defended herself.

Asuka growled at the blue haired girl.

"She's right, Asuka," Misato pointed out.

"I see your game. I'm know `pick on the new girl' when I see it," the auburn haired pilot spat venomously. "I'll prove to you freaks that I can do this stupid dancing game."

"You both know where the kettle is." Misato pretended to be hurt by the teenager's words, but had to turn away to the kitchen to hide her smile.

#

When Gendo had finished washing his hands, he waited for his son to finish up in order to speak with him.

"Shinji," he started, still unable to lose the indifferent tone he took with anyone other than Rei.

"Yes Father?" Shinji answered, drying his hands.

"I…" Gendo started to sweat. He loosened his collar, but that did nothing to ease his breathing.

Finally he slipped to the floor, narrowly avoiding hitting his head.

"Get me Dr. Murata. I need to speak with him," Gendo ordered.

"Yes, Father," Shinji nodded and reached for the man's phone.

Shinji, not knowing the number for the doctor in question, dialled the switchboard. "I need to speak with Dr. Murata. Can you connect me?"

~Please hold.~

Shinji would have been pacing if he two good legs.

~Dr. Murata here, how can I help you?~

"Doctor, it's Shinji Ikari here. My father's collapsed he asked me to speak with you. He slid to the floor, but didn't hit his head."

~Is he breathing?~

"Yes, but it's shallow."

~Can you check his pupils for me?~

Shinji placed the mobile on the floor and removed the sweating man's glasses. The boy tried his best to see into his father's eyes, but was hampered by his own injury. Finally, he was able to see that they were dilated.

"They're big. Is that goods or bad?"

~ Depends. Where are you?~

Shinji was beginning to panic. I'm in the toilets closest to the recovery room. Can you help me please?"

~I'm two minutes away, Shinji. Keep him awake, ok?~

"Yes sir," Shinji hung up the phone. "You've got to stay awake, Father."

"Wha…?" was Gendo's eloquent reply.

"I called the doctor, he said to keep you awake. Please Father, you've got to," Shinji pleaded with tears in his eyes.

"So much like your mother: always wanting to help others. If I don't regain consciousness, tell Fuyutsuki to…"

"To what, Father?" Shinji asked, gently slapping his father in the face to keep him from falling unconscious.

Several long seconds passed for Shinji, before Gendo seemed able to continue his instructions.

"Tell him that…"

The door swung open and the balding doctor rushed in with a team of paramedics.

"Right, we'll take it from here. You get back to your room," the doctor instructed as he checked the pupils with his pen-light. He turned to face the panic stricken pilot. "Shinji, I'll let you know something when I find out why he collapsed. Understand?"

"Yes, sir."

#¬¬¬¬¬&# 194;¬Â¬Â¬Â¬Â¬Â¬

To be continued…

And in case that ending doesn't make you hate me, I will be going to Kawaii Kon in April [2005].

Thanks go out to Chi Vayne for pre-reading this.

If you have any reason to complain/compliment me, then you should contact me in your preferred fashion.

My email don't you know it by now?

Oh well. If you can figure out the missing bits: [lordraa] [digitalpimp] [co.uk]

Until the next time.