Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ Heaven and Hell ❯ If This is Not Heaven ( Chapter 10 )

Manga - Addicts Presents:
Heaven and Hell
Revelations 1:0 - If this is not Heaven

HTML version 09 May 2008

Neon Genesis Evangelion created by, registered, and copyrighted to GAINAX, Project EVA, Movic, and any other company and/or division associated with the creation and/or production of Neon Genesis Evangelion. A.D.Vision holds the copyrights to the English version of Neon Genesis Evangelion.

This work of fiction is not intended for any commercial purposes but was created for the entertainment of the Author and Fans of Neon Genesis Evangelion.

No copyright infringement was in any way intended.

Heaven and Hell written by Jino Turtlegod

Pre-Read by Raymond Ryckman

M Rating. For mature readers only. Some scenes, themes, language, and situations are not suitable for younger readers. Reader discretion is advised.

Revelations 1:0 - If this is not Heaven

Asuka laid back on the floor of the living room in her shorts and yellow tank top. She placidly chewed gummy worms from a bag by her side while the audio player played some piece by Bach. Misato had given her the disk for one of her birthdays along with the message "Music soothes the savage beast". Asuka had allowed the comment to slide since it was her birthday and didn't want an argument. This was the first time she had actually listened to it, though. She stared at the white expanse of the ceiling and somehow found the activity or lack thereof, soothing.

"No wonder Shinji likes to do this," she said aloud as she plopped another worm-like candy into her mouth. Asuka was alone in the apartment after she spent the better half of her day supervising the carpenters who had torn down the wall to the next apartment in order to enlarge their old one. Misato had decided to adopt Juno and Allen into her little family, though it caused no little uneasiness amongst the children concerned.

Shinji had gone off alone somewhere. Rei had standby duty at NERV-1. Misato was helping Juno and Allen pack their stuff for the big move and the three were not expected back until the next day. Asuka closed her eyes and lost herself to the music, trying to forget the sense of mortality that Henri's death had given her.

000

Juno sat cross-legged on the floor in a manner which was not what Japanese consider feminine. Actually she was wearing what the Japanese (or any one else for that matter) wouldn't consider feminine; torn jeans, an old paint-stained shirt and a bandana tied around her head. Around her was what was left of a Chinese take-out lunch that she, Misato and Allen had eaten an hour earlier. She read a manga as she tried to relax after the long day of packing. The girl glanced up at the stacks of moving boxes. It contained all of what she considered her life in Tokyo-3.

She heard a sigh and looked at Allen who was sprawled on his back in a patch of light that streamed in through a window. Allen had a blue cap low over his eyes and a chopstick gripped in his teeth like a gigantic toothpick. His hands were locked behind his head, the knuckles rested on the floorboards.

She wondered why Allen just gave in to Misato's suggestion for them to move in with her and the others. Lately Allen had been quite indifferent and withdrawn unlike the easy-going, friendly boy she had always known him to be. Juno had even expected him to turn down Misato's offer.

It had been three days since Henri passed away and Misato had stayed with them for those three days in an effort to get to know them better. She wasn't really that successful and Allen seemed to be embarrassed around her.

Juno was troubled that Allen had not spoken to her in quite a while. Sure, he had talked to her during meals and training, but it wasn't what she considered real conversation. But then again, she and Allen hadn't been alone for several days; Misato, Rei or Asuka had always been nearby, and Allen had never talked about what he really felt unless he was only with her or Henri.

Juno looked at the door behind her. Misato had left to arrange for the moving van that they would be using the following day. She looked back at Allen, wondering what her friend was thinking of.

Juno stood up and stretched her legs, and then knelt down beside him but out of the patch of light. She looked at his face and was surprised to see him teary-eyed.

"Juno..." he said, his voice laden with self-pity. Juno nodded at him, knowing that he was not asking for an answer, just a confirmation that she was there for him and ready to understand whatever he had to say.

"I- I feel like I'm being torn apart inside..." Allen bit his lips as he tried to grasp at the words that would convey his feelings. "Do you remember how it was like the first few times in the EVA and we feel like our bodies are suddenly bigger and we're uncertain how to move because we may trip over our feet or crash into something without meaning to?"

Juno nodded. It was like being ripped out of one's own body and then being dumped into a body several times bigger than what one was used to. She knew that Allen still had not gotten used to the sensation but did not bother to point it out. It was the only thing that kept him at the bottom of the pilot ranking which Asuka led.

"I feel like that now... as if everything I believed for the past years were nothing but lies. I used to be so sure of what I wanted... now, I'm not even sure if I should be angry or not." Allen sniffed and took out the chopstick from his mouth before wiping his eyes with the back of his other hand. "I am afraid to move because I may ruin everything around me. Misato and the others were responsible for my mom's death. A part of me says that I should be angry at them, but another part says it's not their fault. I really feel bad when I think of killing Misato and I don't think I can really kill people. Misato's kind to me but I feel like I'm betraying my Mom or something. I feel so angry... I- I don't know what to do..." the boy began to stifle the sobs and turned on his side so that Juno won't see him crying.

Juno had no idea how to react. Her parents had been killed in a car accident when she was still a baby so she had no idea on how to act if one of them had just died. She was raised by a spinster aunt who had a lot of money and not much heart. Juno didn't even care if her aunt got killed anytime soon. The only one she had lost that she really cared for was Henri. She couldn't really be angry at the Angels for taking him away. She thought of them as mindless animals doing what was in their nature. She really couldn't blame a lion for killing a favorite lamb. Juno had a stabbing pain in her heart and she didn't know what to do with it, much less other's pain. Juno bit her lips in sadness. Henri would have known what to do in a situation like this. She was the brain; Allen was the muscle; Henri... he had been the heart.

And now that heart had been ripped away.

Juno stood up and went outside the apartment, allowing Allen to cry alone.

000

The ceiling of Terminal Dogma rose high above Rei's blue topped head and beyond the range of the meager light coming from a string of low output light bulbs. She stood in her plugsuit on the edge of the ruined walkway, her blue Unit 14 knelt beside her in the LCL. Far below the twisted metal beneath her feet was the sea of LCL, stretching far towards the darkened edges of the great cavern.

This was the fourth time she had entered this place, this tomb from which the very person who had called her here now had once forbid her entry. She looked at the carbon bakelite encased Angel. They called him Adam but she knew who it really was...

"Rei." The cool familiar voice said. The voice embodied absolute self-control and mind-numbing intelligence. It was the voice of someone who knew her intimate secrets, desires and fears. Rei didn't turn to answer the owner of the voice and instead kept her gaze leveled at the red cross.

"Yes, Dr. Akagi?"

"She has awakened." Ritsuko stepped into the light and started walking to stand beside Rei.

Rei nodded. She had thought that what she had done years before would not come to haunt her, but she had been wrong. Past deeds often have a way of warping the present... especially deeds made by Angels.

"They still don't know, do they?" Ritsuko asked as she too stared at the Angel.

"No. Shinji, Misato and Dr. Ibuki are the only ones who know that I am a clone, a shell for a Soul. I suspect that Commander Santiago and Colonel Hyuga also know but they have made no indication of it that I have noticed." Rei smiled ruefully. Her eyes betrayed sadness. "No one except you know what I really am."

"Good. I want to keep it that way."

"Why?"

"Let's just say it's insurance." Ritsuko said with a hint of amusement. Rei did not say anything on the matter. "So, how does life as a human feel like?"

"It is confusing." Rei turned to face the woman Ritsuko saw the red eyes full of emotion, not like the lifeless red orbs that she remembered when they last met two years before. "But I love it."

Ritsuko smiled. "Yes, I thought you would find it as such."

Rei returned her gaze to the Angel. "And why did you call me here?"

"I made a mistake." Only Rei's eyes moved to look at the woman. As far as she knew, Ritsuko had only once before admitted making a mistake. "I thought what you did would not affect her, but it did."

"Yes. I felt her come alive when they were extracting Unit 01. I felt her crying out to me..." Rei turned to face Ritsuko and the older woman could see the fear in the teenager's eyes. "She wanted me to reunite with her."

"I thought so." Ritsuko crossed her arms before her. "There is only one way to stop it."

"...Destroy her?" Rei said, the same fear in her voice.

"No, nothing so drastic as that," Ritsuko answered, not daring to look at the girl. "We'll have to extract the soul fragment you left there."

000

NERV-1
Simulations Training Area
Extended Operations Exercise
Subject: Lt. Kensuke Aida / Unit 15

"To your nine," Lieutenant Kensuke Aida heard Lt. Antoinette St. Croix's hesitant voice come over the communications gear. Kensuke turned the EVA and brought up the targeting crosshairs across the monitor to the computer-generated form of an Angel. He briefly wondered how such a high-strung person was given chief control responsibility. Calm control officers brought out efficient pilots and sub-control teams. Controllers who couldn't inspire confidence in the pilots however...

Kensuke pulled the trigger and watched in disbelief as the form disappeared in a blur of movement. The shells arced downwards into a building complex, annihilating it. Kensuke gave a wry grin as he backed the EVA to an armored building, the positron cannon across its chest as a make-shift shield.

"Where is it?" Kensuke added a tinge of impatience in his voice. He had been in this particular simulation for over an hour now and it was trying his patience. He was also developing a headache due to the mental burden of piloting an EVA. He knew that as time passed, the synchro ratio falls due to mental fatigue. He could feel the sluggishness in the EVA's movement as his synchro ratio approached 40, the minimum required score to pilot an EVA with rudimentary controls. Anything below 40 would make fighting suicidal.

"Um, it's circling to your left... NO! to your right!"

Kensuke cursed as he nearly bared his EVA's back to the enemy. He growled as he sprayed shells across his line of vision. He could just see the blurred form of the Angel as it moved at incredible speed.

Suddenly, the EVA stopped functioning. Kensuke groggily pulled at his control sticks to no avail. He looked up as he saw the Angel solidify before him, its great talons crashing down towards him.

"Um, system not responding, OH! FUCK!! Synchro ratio is 38 percent! Shit! Cutting nerve connection!!" Lt. Antoinette frantically cried out sending the control team into panic.

Kensuke screamed as he felt the Angel dig its claws into his EVA before Lt. Antoinette could cut his nerve connection to the EVA.

000

Asuka awakened to the smell of something cooking. She felt something soft under her head and she reached up to touch it. Someone had placed a pillow under her head.

Asuka sat up and looked around. The apartment had been straightened out. The mess that the carpenters had left had been swept away, the curtains neatly tucked and the furniture re-aligned. Her bag of gummy worms was on the coffee table.

Asuka went to the kitchen and found it empty. A pot of something simmered on the stove and vegetables and cooking utensils were neatly arranged on the table, prepared for whoever was cooking. She went back to the hallway and saw that the door to Shinji's room was closed.

"He's probably taking a nap," Asuka thought with a smile as she stood before his door. She went to her room and took her bath things then went to the bathroom, which was located conveniently beside the kitchen. She took off her clothes leisurely as she thought of her feelings for Shinji. She thought he was nice and sweet but too damned timid, insecure and repressed. At least he's no longer too much of a wimp. She folded her clothes and placed them on the hamper before standing naked in front of the bathroom sink. She did have to concede the fact that she felt an attraction to him. She traced his name on the fog on the mirror, reveling on the sensation as the condensed moisture trickled down her finger with each slow, curving stroke she made.

Realization suddenly struck Asuka—`Why is the mirror fogged?!'

She slowly turned in horror to look at the tub. Her brain took in the blue towel with the neatly embroidered kanji of a boy's name and the definitely unfeminine clothes folded neatly beside it. An alarm clock sat on tub's rim and she briefly wondered what an alarm clock was doing in the bathroom.

She saw the owner of the items sitting languidly in the hot tub of water, his eyes closed as he took a hot relaxing soak. A small towel was on his head and his arms were draped on the tub's tiled rim. In the deafening silence, Asuka could hear his gentle, even breathing.

Asuka gave a sigh of relief. `He's sleeping.'

She blushed as she noticed that she was naked in the same room with a naked boy. She also noticed that she could see him through the water. Asuka blushed even harder and turned away from him, overcoming the urge to stare any longer. She hurriedly reached for her towel when the alarm clock rang, making her freeze in mid-motion.

Asuka whirled around as Shinji's eyes fluttered open and the boy stood up in the tub and stretched his arms over his head. The boy slowly raised his leg to get out of the tub when he noticed her. The alarm clock's incessant ringing was relegated to the background, as they felt that the synchronized beating of their hearts were louder than any drum.

They looked at each other. They took into account that the other was naked. And the fact that the other had stopped in a very interesting position. The reaction was quite predictable-

"AAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!"