Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ Heaven and Hell ❯ If I Can't be Yours ( Chapter 15 )

Manga - Addicts Presents:
Heaven and Hell
Revelations 1:5 - If I Can't be Yours

HTML version 16 May 2008

Neon Genesis Evangelion created by, registered, and copyrighted to GAINAX, Project EVA, Movic, and any other company and/or division associated with the creation and/or production of Neon Genesis Evangelion. A.D.Vision holds the copyrights to the English version of Neon Genesis Evangelion.

This work of fiction is not intended for any commercial purposes but was created for the entertainment of the Author and Fans of Neon Genesis Evangelion.

No copyright infringement was in any way intended.

Heaven and Hell written by Jino Turtlegod

M Rating. For mature readers only. Some scenes, themes, language, and situations are not suitable for younger readers. Reader discretion is advised.

Revelations 1:5 - If I Can't be Yours

"ASUKA!!" Kensuke cried out as he saw the ball of light rush towards the red Unit 02.

"CHEAT!!" Asuka screamed in pain and fury as she felt her EVA's left side disintegrate. It was a trap! Another enemy EVA had been waiting for them from one of the rooftops while the other EVA distracted them with a frontal assault. Asuka felt bitter - the enemy had taken the very same tactic she had just used. She screamed as she fired her cannon while her EVA fell down amongst the rubble. One of Asuka's shots hit the charging enemy EVA on the right shoulder and spun it backwards and away from her. Asuka fell unconscious.

Kensuke felt a wave of rage overcome him. His EVA's eyes flashed white and the sealed armored jaw of its head sprouted cracks. His EVA brought up its cannon and shredded the cover the enemy was using. The sniper EVA jumped away from its hiding place and was destroyed in mid flight as a warning beep told Kensuke his cannon was empty.

Kensuke gave a whoop of joy which was cut short when he noticed that Asuka's attacker had drawn out its progressive knife to finish off Asuka. Without thinking, Kensuke made his EVA jump off the roof of the building he was on, his Unit 15 drew its folded lance from the rack on its back.

Red blood splattered on the burned walls of the ruins. Something roared its rage into the burning sky.

Asuka screamed as she sat up on the bed, fleeing from a nightmare where Unit 01 had gone berserk, ripping other EVAs apart with its bare hands. She felt pain pounding from the left side of her body and she grasped her arm, relief washed over her at the knowledge that her body was still complete.

"Asuka!" Hikari was immediately by her friend's side. With a cry of joy, Hikari went to the door and shouted for a doctor.

"Where?" Asuka groggily looked around as a doctor came to check up on her.

"Tokyo-3. You've been unconscious for four days." Hikari supplied with tears in her eyes as she hugged her bestfriend.

"What happened." She looked in incomprehension around her, the last thing she remembered was feeling the positron shell rip her EVA apart.

"Your EVA got hit pretty bad but Kensuke saved you. They thought you would die, but you pulled through--" Hikari couldn't help shedding tears as she tightened her arms around her friend.

Asuka laughed in relief. "Where's Kensuke? I've got to thank him."

Hikari looked away from Asuka's questioning eyes.

000

They were all there.

The eleven had been gathered, those that remained from the original thirteen. They all stood stiff attention in their black uniforms in the white room. They were the commanders of the surviving eleven branches. Eleven since two of their number had fallen. They are the darkness.

Secretary-General Reinholt and the twelve generals of the General Committee for Security sat behind the white table which separated them from the dark guardians. They are the light.

They waited.

A man with long hair, wearing dark glasses, and a black suit entered the room. Everyone recognized him. He was Section Two. The personification of the shadow within the darkness within the light.

Reinholt nodded to him and the man began his report.

"The enemy is calling itself the 'Sword of God'. They are composed of the remains of the sects and cults that opposed NERV's funding and operation during the First Wave or tried to send assassins and saboteurs against NERV personnel and assets. These groups were disbanded legally or covertly eliminated by NERV Section Two in the fifteen year period before the War of Unification."

Reiholt looked up from the report he was reading. "And this time around they succeeded in their goals to thwart NERV and the UN. To the point of acquiring seven EVAs which we later destroyed; uncovering and subverting the dummy plug failsafe; destroying twenty EVAs and heavily damaging eleven more. They killed thirty four pilots and rendered seven pilots brain-damaged; kidnapped nine candidates of which two were raped and later killed, the remainder of which were killed during the battle. We have over six hundred thousand dead; from the losses in the battle for the Ninth Branch and when they detonated two N2 mines in the Tenth Branch. We also have five N2 mines unaccounted for." Reinholt sighed and looked at the report in his hands. "Tell me, Section Two, why were we unable to stop them? This would have never happened under Ikari."

All eyes turned to the Director of Section Two. Santiago looked at the man with interest since he had personally selected the unassuming-looking man as his replacement.

"That is exactly the reason they succeeded, sir." The Section Two Director stated in his calm, collected voice. His black eyes cold and indifferent as they gazed out from a thin face framed by long straight black hair. Everyone, except Santiago, was taken aback by the curt answer. "Section Two's budget and allowed strength were reduced by more than half since 2016. Ikari never made the mistake of cutting our budget in exchange for the moral high-ground. We were given orders by this very same committee to focus our limited resources on finding the assassins that killed the four pilots from Berlin, Paris, Beijing, and Melbourne. It is already in the record that Section Two suggested that the assassinations were distractions and that all NERV branches should immediately go on alert. It is also on record that Section Two's recommendation was ignored because the committee does not wish the public to know that another rebell--"

"ENOUGH!!" All eyes turned to the general on Reinholt's right. "That is enough, Director! We did not ask you to criticize us!"

Santiago smirked slightly as he watched the long haired Director calmly stare down the hot-headed general. It seemed as if he hadn't made a mistake in selecting his replacement. Not once did the younger man flinch or raise his voice.

"There is no need to blame others." Everyone listened as the Secretary General began to speak. "The enemy used our desire for civilized conduct against us. They knew that we would not resort to their depraved methods. They knew that we are not an inhuman organization like the one that Ikari ran, and that was our downfall. But will this new rebellion force us to be inhuman once more? To indulge in the massacre of innocents that they so delight in? Will we resort once more to daggers waiting in the darkness? No! I say, no!"

The others waited as Reinholt caught his breath. Santiago did have to admit that the Messiah was one Hell of an orator.

"As of today, this 'Sword of God' is the enemy of the whole world. It is an evil that cloaks itself in righteousness. It is our duty to protect the world from their corruption. As of today, the United Nations Peacekeeping Forces are under war conditions. All NERV branches have martial authority over the cities they guard. What befell the Ninth and the Tenth branches must never happen again!"

The darkness snapped to attention and saluted the Secretary General.

000

1st Lt. Corrie Hayes absent-mindedly fondled the bars of the new insignia on his collar. Lt. Antoinette St. Croix eyed him jealously. Lt. Hanano Miyazawa, a replacement technician, was at Lt. Miyuki Kata's post since the control officer fainted due to fatigue.

"I guess you're quite pleased with yourself, Lt. Hayes," Antoinette remarked with a bit of sarcasm.

Corrie blinked as his reverie was shattered. "Wha-?! Oh, you mean the promotion? Yeah, I guess I owe everyone a beer."

Antoinette turned her chair to look at her new superior officer. `Doesn't he know I hate him?!' She was startled as Corrie turned to face her, a smile on his face.

"How about after this shift?"

Antoinette reddened. `Is he asking...' "Ah, sure... I guess..."

Corrie beamed at her. "Cool!" Then he turned to Miyazawa. "Hey, Kano! How 'bout it?"

"Free beer? Sure thing, sir," the woman with short brown hair replied with an impish grin.

Antoinette sighed as she returned to her workstation. `Maybe not...'

000

`She's all right now...'

Shinji looked up at the ceiling of his new apartment as he lay on the floor. The apartment seemed bare because his sparse belongings were still in the packing box he had crammed them into.

Officially, he was supposed to be under arrest and should have been in one of the maximum security cells deep within the bowels of NERV-1. Hijacking an EVA and subverting a superior officer to be his accomplice was punishable by death. As it was, Santiago pointed out to the Committee that Pilot Ikari's selfish intention to save Pilot Soryu did result in the destruction of the Sword of God's seven EVAs.

When the Committee finally relented and downgraded the punishment, it released the order that Pilot Ikari and Colonel Hyuga were to be imprisoned indefinitely. Since the orders mysteriously disappeared from all records, Commander Santiago had been forced to release his second in command and his best pilot.

Shinji could never understand adults and the games they played.

With an annoyed snort, Shinji sat up and looked at his bare apartment. The decision to move out of Misato's apartment had been hard but necessary. He didn't feel like living under the same roof as Asuka.

He walked over to the balcony and looked out at Tokyo-3. He turned and looked up at the balcony above him. He was right under Misato's apartment. `I'll still protect you. That's the only way I can make up for what I have done...' He thought to himself as he continued his vigil over the fortress city.

`We didn't finish the swimming lesson...'

000

The blue Angel dodged the barrage coming from Allen's Unit 32 and disappeared in the cloud of smoke. Allen gasped and backed himself towards Juno's Unit 30.

"Great job, Allen!" Juno cheered sarcastically.

"Shut up!" Allen snapped back. They had been going for at least two hours and the stress was finally getting to the both of them.

"Angel is circling, it is going above you on the rooftops!" Lt. St. Croix reported. Antoinette was quite nervous since Colonel Misato Katsuragi had personally volunteered to oversee the training mission. Allen pointed his palette gun upwards while Juno drew back her lance.

"SHE'S CHARGING?!" Antoinette screamed in warning as the Angel suddenly dropped towards both EVAs. "SCATTER!"

Allen's EVA fell with its gun firing, a progressive knife stuck to its chest. The Angel landed lightly on its feet then charged Juno's EVA-30. Juno thrust her lance forward. The Angel jumped over the lance, stepped on it, and then high-kicked Unit 30 in the head. As Unit 30 fell backward, the Angel grabbed the lance and wrested it away from the EVA and turned the blade around. By the time the Angel's feet touched the street, it had already run Unit 30 through with its own lance. Allen's EVA regained its footing and it fired at the Angel's head. As if performing a dance, the Angel tilted its body to a side as it pulled the lance free from Unit 30, crouched down, and launched the lance in one fluid motion. Allen's Unit 32's head went sailing off. And it all took less than eight seconds.

Lt. Antoinette was drenched in sweat. She just lost both EVAs without doing any damage to the Angel. This was bad.

Misato looked at the monitors and noted that Antoinette had disconnected both pilots before the Angel destroyed their EVAs. The Colonel made a notation on the clipboard she carried.

"All pilots return. Good job, Rei." Misato said into her headset. She waited for the pilots to acknowledge before turning to the control staff. "Well, it looks like this team has passed the evaluation. Good job, everybody."

Antoinette simply sighed in relief. Lt. Hayes and Miyazawa gave her the thumbs up. Antoinette smiled back. She really needed that beer Corrie promised.

000

NERV-1 Indoor Firing Range

The gun's report was loud. Shinji looked at the paper target ten meters in front of him. That made it forty times in a row that he missed.

"It's easier in an EVA isn't it?"

Shinji looked back at his guardian who was quietly having a smoke behind him. He just nodded as he reloaded his gun. As he brought up the gun once more, he felt Ritsuko walk towards him. She ran her hand along his arm and raised it a bit more. She whispered in his ear.

"Don't forget to breathe. Imagine yourself in an EVA."

Shinji nodded. He began to breathe deeply as he put his imagination to work. He could almost see the targeting displays come on line. He gritted his teeth. "Center on target. Switch."

Ritsuko withdrew her hand from her ward's skin. She ran the tip of her thumb over her finger tips. She smiled.

000

Asuka stood in front of the grave marker in khaki fatigues, a bullet proof vest protected her body and a helmet was on her head. A rifle was slung over her shoulder and a pistol holstered at her side. Hikari stood behind her and to her right, the girl also wore the same gear as Asuka. Several other soldiers stood watch near an armored personnel carrier Asuka had borrowed.

Asuka saluted before turning on her heels to return to the safety of the armored vehicle.

000

NERV-1 Accommodation Block

Colonel Makoto Hyuga sat in his apartment's living room. He had given the nanny the day off as he wanted to take care of his daughter personally. As he rocked his baby's cradle, he nursed a drink and watched the TV with the volume turned down. Outside, the geofront's ambient light was turned down to simulate the late afternoon condition on the surface.

"Ah, domestic bliss. Makoto, I envy you."

Makoto simply grinned weakly. Most people would have had heart attacks when the Director of Section Two suddenly appeared in their house uninvited (that is if they knew who he was). As it was, the Director had standing invitations to the Hyuga household. He had been the best man during the wedding.

"Not, really Shigeru, not really. Go help yourself to the drinks. You know where it is."

000

"Unit 02 and 15 have engaged two enemy units in the Southern Quadrant," Makoto reported from a mini-screen inside the entry plug. "All other UN EVAs are down, enemy units converging on to their area! Be careful Shinji!"

Shinji nodded from his seat as he gripped the control handles in agitation.

"SHIT! Unit 02's down!" Makoto's voice was strained as he tried to out-maneuver the two UN fighters on their way to stop Unit 01's carrier.

A chill washed over Shinji as he felt a part of him suddenly disappear.

"UNIT 15 DESTROYED!! PILOT FLATSCAN!!" Makoto screamed into the comm link as they neared final approach.

The young man screamed. "UNIT 01! LAUNCH!!" The locks came off with the snap-hiss of hydraulics and the armored giant fell to the hellish battlefield trailing vapor as it fell.

That was Shinji's last coherent thought. The rest of the battle was just a blur of action, thoughts were unnecessary as he entered the no-mind state of a berserker.

He screamed in anger as he crashed into the one armed EVA that had downed Kensuke. Shinji straddled the EVA as it tried to get up and then crushed the head in his purple hands. Shinji then punched through the enemy EVA's armored chest and ripped out the EVA's dummy plug from the hole he had made. With a twitch of his hand he destroyed the plug.

On down, five more targets to go.

He could feel them coming.

He wanted them to come.

The silver EVAs converged on the only remaining UN EVA - Unit 01. As they rushed Unit 01 with their lances and prog knives, Shinji's purple armored body tensed. With a roar, his armored jaw opened.

A purple light flared from Shinji's body and engulfed the charging EVAs and stopped them in their tracks. The pillar of light rushed up into the sky and formed a cross that illuminated the battlefield as if it were morning.

In a mad rush of speed, Shinji grabbed an EVA by an arm and a leg and broke it into two over his jutting knee skid. He then threw the parts with enough force to launch of a pair of EVAs off their feet.

An EVA rushed up to attack him. He just looked at it, his eyes flared deathly white, and the enemy EVA was thrown back, most of its frontal armor disintegrated when Shinji's AT Field hit it. Without pause, Shinji flashed forward and slammed the EVA's head into a burning building. The enemy twitched as it hung by its neck from the hole in the ruined building. As Shinji turned his back on the doomed EVA the weakened structure collapsed atop the enemy.

Shinji turned to the last standing EVA. He made slashing motions with his hands and the enemy was neatly halved by projected AT Fields. Blood and LCL sprayed into the heated air from the dismembered parts of the EVA as the upper body pinwheeled in the air. The lower body fell to its knees from the impact of the main body on the street.

The two EVAs he had knocked down were back on their feet and launched themselves at Shinji with synchronized flying kicks. Shinji dodged both and deftly caught the outstretched leg of one of the EVAs and used the unlucky EVA as a club to bash the other one out of the air. He then began to bash the EVA he had caught against its partner in an unmerciful display or raw power until the EVA's leg finally gave way and came off at the knee, throwing the EVA Shinji was using as a club behind the monstrous young man. It lay behind Shinji as its partner was before the young man - a broken heap of mutilated flesh and steel.

He looked down at his shortened club, steam rising from his breath as he panted. He could feel his throat raw from the unfamiliar bestial roaring he had done throughout the slaughter. He released the severed leg, he no longer needed it as a weapon.

It was just a simple matter of ripping out the dummy plugs and crushing them in his hands.

In a moment it was all over. Then he began to eat.

Shinji gave a start and disturbed the water in the communal bathtub as he was brought back to the present. When he was being debriefed he couldn't remember any of the details of the battle, why did he remember them now?

His breathing was ragged as he brought his palm to his face. In the background the sound of dripping water echoed in the still silence.

Shinji came upon a horrifying discovery. All along he believed that the EVA was evil. That it wanted death and destruction. But during the battle, it wasn't the EVA that went berserk. It was him. At the time that he saw his friend die, the distinction between Self and EVA disappeared, and he had looked upon his true self. And it was not good.

Did that mean it was him who was evil? Did it mean that he willfully killed that doctor? If so then what about Koworu death? Or what happened to Asuka?

"Interesting." The whispered word echoed in the communal bath.

In a flash Shinji reached for the gun he had placed upon the tub's rim and had it trained upon the owner of the unknown voice - a boy with blond spiky hair and a gold cross earring dangled from his left ear. He wore an oversized formal school jacket over a simple black plugsuit.

"Who are you?" Shinji surprised himself with the tone of his voice. He was so confident. So cold.

The boy cocked his head to a side, unperturbed by the gun trained on him. "Who am I? Shitou."

Shinji's reluctance to hurt people saved the blond boy from getting shot.

The boy smiled in amusement. "Yamato Shitou, pleased to meet you, Ikari Shinji." The boy walked over to Shinji, who scuttled back away from him. Once more, Shitou smiled in amusement. He reached into his jacket.

Shinji fired. The gun's report echoed in the bath.

Shitou smiled. "You are a lousy shot, Mr. Ikari. I meant you no harm." Shitou withdrew a disk from his jacket. "I think this will be of interest to you."

The blond boy placed the disk on the tub's rim. "Mr. Ikari, the next time you shoot, it would be helpful if you keep your eyes open when you squeeze the trigger." Again, he had the smile that Shinji had started to hate.

Shinji looked at the disc and finally reached for it. When he looked about, the boy was no longer there. All that remained to prove that the encounter had happened were the bullet hole on the tiled wall, the spent cartridge on the floor tiles, the acrid stench of gunpowder, and the disc in Shinji's hand.

000

Somewhere deep within the bowels of Central Dogma, a door opened and spilled light into the darkness. A figure cast its shadow on the rectangle of light. The figure then moved to the large, bulky machine in the middle of the room. The machine was scorched, its casing was dented and pockmarked by bullets.

The figure stopped before the machine and gazed almost affectionately at it.

"Hello, Mother," Ritsuko said in way of greeting.

000

Lt. Hanano Miyazawa began to giggle again. Lt. Antoinette St. Croix thought it was creepy, the way the woman would look sly and then have a giggle fit. Lt. Corrie Hayes was a bit tipsy and joined in the giggling.

Lt. Miyuki Kata just rolled her eyes and continued drinking, she really wished she hadn't gotten dragged into this, free beer notwithstanding. She never did ask for companionship.

"TO WORL PEESH!!" Hanano finally blurted out as she raised her beer mug in a toast. She immediately keeled over into unconsciousness and Antoinette had to catch her beer mug before it spilled.

"Well, it seems that the entertainment just passed out," Miyuki muttered as she looked around the lounge. She saw Hikari, Asuka, and Toji sitting together at a table.

"You're getting married?" Asuka repeated in disbelief as she looked into her mug.

"Yeah, my father was really crying his eyes out, saying that I'm too young and that I'm still his baby," Hikari said with a nervous laugh. "Anyway, I want you to be my maid of honor."

"You're going to get married in the middle of a war?" Asuka asked morosely as she drank her beer. She sighed. The redhead looked at Hikari disapprovingly. "Are you sure it's love and not the instinctual desire to propagate for the survival of the species? Or did he knock you up already?"

Hikari looked shocked and hurt. This was something she hadn't expected from her best friend. True, she was pregnant, but... The girl slapped Asuka and then ran away as the tears streamed from her eyes.

Toji glared angrily at Asuka as his hands balled up into fists. "You really are a bitch you know that?!" Toji then stood up to follow his fiancée.

Asuka looked numbly into her mug. And then threw it at a wall. She ignored the looks the other patrons were giving her as she stood up and made her way home.

"bitch queen strikes again..." Lt. Kata murmured into her mug.

"luuv 'n peesh..." Lt. Miyazawa gurgled drunkenly.

000

"She did what?!" Shigeru asked his inebriated friend. He was feeding the baby with the bottle because he didn't trust Makoto to do it properly in his drunken depressed state.

"I brought Rit-chan in for the inoculation and to cheer up Maya," Makoto downed his glass for the umpteenth time. "Y' see it was after the Twenty-First and we thought that bitch Rist-Ritst-Ritsuko... yeah Ritsuko, we thought the bitch died."

"Anyway, I was surp- surprised when I entered Maya's lab and there she was!"

"Who?" Shigeru poured another drink for his friend.

"Both of them," Makoto looked morosely at his glass. In the golden liquid he could see images. Maya leaning towards Ritsuko, her hands clutching in what seemed to be desperation at the other woman's coat. "I should stop."

"Come on, unburden yourself, man. You always kept what you feel bottled up."

"Just like Shinji..."

"Yes. Just like Shinji."

"At least he gets to live with the woman I first proposed to..." Makoto said miserably. A feminine gasp could be heard from the foyer, too low to be heard by the drunken colonel.

Shigeru snorted as he looked at his friend. He took a sidelong glance at the foyer just in case.

"ANYWAy... where was I? Oh, yeah... So there they were...they were..."

Shigeru watched as his friend dozed off into unconsciousness. `You never could hold your drink.' He looked at the baby in his arms. The baby looked up at him with clear intelligent eyes. He could hear Maya sobbing in the foyer.

With a sigh of exasperation he gave the baby some advice as he made her burp. "Don't be like your parents."

000

"Is it true?" Shinji asked as he curled up against a corner, his face buried between his knees which he had pulled up to his chest.

"Where did you get this disk?" Ritsuko asked as she typed on her laptop at Shinji's kitchen table.

"THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT!" Shinji screamed in frustration.

Ritsuko licked her lips as she thought of a way to phrase her words without upsetting her ward anymore than necessary. She soon gave up. "Yes. It's true. The dummy plugs were created from data taken from the first three Children."

Shinji swallowed the lump in his throat. "And the failsafe?"

Ritsuko steeled herself, "Yes, the dummy plugs required an actual living pilot in order to function. It uses the pilot's neural connections instead of directly interacting with the EVA. By taking over the pilot's body, the dummy plug fools the EVA into thinking that the pilot's soul is its own - allowing for a greater degree of control. It also prevents misuse of the dummy plugs because a pilot must also be coerced into entering the dummy plug."

"That means..."

"Yes..." Ritsuko licked her dry lips, knowing exactly how her words will affect her ward. But she could not lie to him. "The dummy plug EVAs you fought contained Children."

Shinji groaned in despair. An image flashed in his mind.

A giant purple hand crushing a white entry plug.

To Be Continued

In the Next Episode of Heaven and Hell:
Juno: A single step forward into the depths of darkness between Heaven and Hell as more pages of the Project are revealed. Heaven and Hell 1:6 - Lies and Silence II.