Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ Imperfection ❯ Chapter Five ( Chapter 5 )

Imperfection

Disclaimer: I don't own NGE

A/N: OMG. I've had a major block-out year for this fic, partly due to the fact that I haven't been watching Evangelion. So, just recently, I got out the tape that I recorded of the two movies, Death and Rebirth and End of Evangelion, to watch and got myself started on this chapter. There's also the reason that I don't understand all this instrumentality project, SEELE, NERV and Dead Sea Scroll stuff, not to mention the Third Impact and all. I'm only guessing things right now . . .

ENJOY!

---- Chapter Five ----

When Asuka called closed her eyes to go to sleep that night, her mind was immediately bombarded with images. A doll, hanging from the ceiling. The whitewashed walls of an enclosed ward, drenched red because of the blood flooding her eyes. A pair of feet dangling in mid-air connected to a lifeless body dressed in hospital white.

"Mommy! They chose me, mommy!" she heard herself shout gleefully.

Not again . . .

"I'm going to pilot Eva!" she continued.

No . . .

"I'm the best in the world! Look at me mommy!"

NO!

She sat up, drenched in cold sweat. Her heart was hammering painfully and she felt as if she had a splitting headache coming on. The muscles in her arms moved impulsively over her head, grabbing handfuls of her sweat drenched red hair, shaking uncontrollably. Voices, the same dreams over and over again, her mother's still form in mid-air. The pictures and sounds never left, plaguing her mind and tearing apart her very soul.

Every time she closed her eyes that was what she saw. Her dreams were filled with these memories that refused to go away. At these times, she didn't want to be alone, but her pride didn't let her ask for help. If that idiot Shinji saw her like this . . . how was she to face the humiliation - knowing that he would discover her confidence was merely a façade.

"Don't leave me alone," she whimpered, curling into a tight ball. "Don't leave me alone."

"Where's mommy's little doll?"

I'm not your doll.

"They chose me mommy! Look at me!"

I'm not a doll for you to play with.

"Mommy?"

--------

Rei set the bow to her violin carefully. She normally didn't play, but when she did, it was always her favourite tune. Pachebel Cannon in D. For some reason, this particular piece soothed her and set her at ease. She drew the bow carefully, the first note filling the quiet room. Her mind immediately relaxed and fell into the gentle sway of things.

Out of nowhere, the sound of a viola joined hers. She raised her eyes to see Kaoru across the room, eyes closed while his fingers glided over the strings. He held the viola like a professional, even if he had only started learning it when he took up a life at school. To say he was adept at it would be the understatement of the century.

"You are feeling sad," he noted when they stopped playing. "I can hear it in your music."

"Nagisa . . ." her monotonous voice had a frosted edge. "You are interrupting me."

"I apologise. However, we are kin and as kin, I have a right to be concerned, if I may say so, for the wellbeing of you, who is born of Lilith, as I of Adam."

She put her violin away and snapped the lid shut. Kaoru stood by the window, seemingly oblivious to what Rei was doing though his eyes told differently. They burned into her; it was almost like being under an X-ray. Sometimes Kaoru just didn't know how much he unnerved people with his blood red stare.

"Pilot Ikari - Shinji - enjoys music," she said, as if that settled the discussion.

"But do you?"

"I don't understand."

"Do you play music only because Shinji enjoys it?" Kaoru asked. "Or is it because you yourself find it enjoyable? What does your heart tell you?"

She met his eyes levelly. They were the same, placid and yet penetrating red hues. Hers, she knew, were always shuttered - closed to everyone other than herself and the commander. But inside, she was confused. What was his purpose - his aim, asking her all these questions? What did it have to do with him, whether or not she enjoyed music because Shinji did? He was raising her doubts, whether he was aware or not.

"I enjoy music," she said shortly.

"That is good," he replied, turning back to the window. "I enjoy music as well."

He raised the viola again and to play. Rei closed her eyes, relaxing, as the sad, slow tune of Thanatos filled the room.

--------

"Mr Nagisa?"

Kaoru looked up when he heard his name being called. The homeroom teacher was standing next to his desk, a long ruler in his hand. The angel sighed. He was probably going to get in trouble for not paying attention or something equally unfair. It wasn't that he didn't try to pay attention, but it was so HARD, especially when the things they were being taught were all wrong.

The events at the Second Impact . . . a meteor hitting Antarctica? Who in the world made up that kind of nonsense? Of course, his common sense told him that it would be better if he didn't correct them. Lilims wouldn't believe him.

Speaking of lilims . . . the self-important bastard at NERV was in need of his services this afternoon. Of course, he would then have to find a way to enter headquarters without being seen by Shinji, use the quickest and most efficient way to converse with Gendo and then leave. It wasn't unusual for him, but he was getting tired of it.

"Mr Nagisa," the teacher repeated. "Are you paying attention?"

"Yes sir."

"We have received a message from the Department of Education to transfer you to Tokyo-3 Municipal High School," the teacher informed him. "You can further your studies there."

Now he had Kaoru's attention. They wanted to transfer him to the same school as Shinji? But didn't that blasted commander order him far away from the pilot as possible? What was going on? Outwardly, he wore that same, confident smirk and said he understood. The teacher told him that he would be briefed about his transfer tomorrow morning and he would attend Tokyo-3 Municipal High School on the following Monday.

"That is just another thing I would have to ask about," he mused.

He knew that NERV was well aware of his situation, and yet they did nothing to prevent it. What could they possibly want? If he was to become a pilot again, that meant he would have to rejoin Shinji's class, which contained all students who were possible candidates to pilot Eva. That meant he would have to face him again.

"What are you thinking, Gendo Ikari? You lilims are very strange creatures. I do not understand the way you think."

---- End of Chapter Five ----

A/N: I'M BACK! HAHAHAHA!

I've lost the plot, so I made a new one. Some of this might not make sense so bear with me. I haven't written this for a LONG time. I love the Evangelion songs so I downloaded them and while I was listening, I had a sudden inspiration to write this fic again. Not to mention the fact that I've re-started reading Evangelion fics so I'm good and ready to start.

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Bittersweet Angel Chika