Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ Lavish ❯ Lavish ( One-Shot )

Disclaimer: I do not own Evangelion or any of the characters.

 

Shinji solemnly stared at the grave in front of him without any expression, his senses numbed by the guilt that loomed over him like the dark clouds above. This wasn't a funeral... What remained of her family willingly relinquished the right to properly bury her in hopes of being able to safely escape from the city before another Angel attacked.

 

Instead of final goodbyes all she got was an unmarked grave.

 

This wasn't supposed to happen. She deserved so much better, so much more. Even now, he could remember the days she welcomed him with a smile blissfully unaware of the tragedy he would bring into her life.

 

He failed to protect the things that were important not just once or twice but consistently and constantly. The school where they met for the first time was now a pile of broken concrete and debris. Her friends fled, some of them caught up in the sad things that happened. Even her little sister...

 

“Hikari…” He whispered.

 

The pilot faltered, mud splattering across the grass as his knees made contact with the ground. Why did it have to happen to her? Why did it have to happen to someone who already had it so hard?

 

A splash from behind was enough to let him know that someone was coming but he made no attempt to move, his sight glued not to the mud that stained his slacks but the muddy grave itself.

 

“Shinji… Get up.”

 

He knew that voice.

 

“Kodama?”

 

Once the oldest and now the only sister… She was someone that was easy to talk to. The type of person that was never serious about anything aside from having her fun at the expense of others.

 

“Leave me alone…” Shinji mumbled with no action behind his words. It started to rain again but he had no reason to care seeing that he was already soaked.

 

Kodama pulled an umbrella out of her purse and raised it. Drops bounced wildly off the plastic as it started to rain harder than before but that was of no concern to her.

 

The pilot looked over his shoulder, actually acknowledging her presence as she moved closer to him. He started at her shoes, the black high heels covered with mud thanks to the hill she had to climb to get here and her modest, simple black dress was something that didn't look right on her when he clearly remembered the clothes she preferred. Still, it was her face that caught his attention.

 

She looked serious which was a given considering everything that happened. Her hazel eyes scanned the lonely cemetery, the gloomy weather one reason why she expected herself to be the only visitor. The mischievous smile that was usually there, like her ponytail, was gone. Her long beautiful black hair was untied and free, the ends of it stopping around her waist.

 

Thanks to him turning to face her, she noticed that he changed as much as she did. His clothes, a suit he most likely brought with his own money just for the depressing occasion, were dirty. Pieces of grass and mud stuck to him like the nightmares that kept him up so many nights.

 

“What…” Kodama looked away, the sight of him so depressed breaking her heart, “What can I do to make you happy?”

 

They locked eyes but what they were looking at wasn't each other. What she saw wasn't Shinji but instead a shell of her sister's boyfriend, the content of his character lost with the girl that swore she would always be there for him. He looked up and saw a mistake, another one of his regrets added to an already long list.

 

They both knew the answer to her heartfelt question and he truthfully but bluntly replied.

 

“Nothing.”

 

 

Lavish

 

 

Rain was the only thing that accompanied him on his trip down misery lane. It was cloudy when he left Misato's apartment but he didn't care when it started to rain. No matter how hard it was to do, he was going to give her his farewell no matter what or who was in his way.

 

With his luck, he managed to miss it despite the fact he got there as fast as he could and the man who did the miserable task could only offer an apology before leading him to where she rested.

 

And now he was with her…

 

“Alright,” Kodama nodded as she spoke into her cell phone, “I'll call you back later. Bye.”

 

The thunder boomed as the downpour continued, the annoying patter of rain against the sliding glass door starting to grate on her nerves. Hanging up, she folded the cell phone before placing it on the table her guest sat at, “I called and told her you were with me all day.”

 

Shinji didn't say anything as he sat with his elbow planted on the table, his chin in the palm of his hand. He stared at the rain hitting the glass door that lead to the balcony.

 

“She was worried about you. You should have told her-“

 

“I'm the only one active.” Shinji cut in, sighing as he turned to older woman, “She doesn't care as long as I do what they want me to do.”

 

Sensing that it was something he didn't want to talk about, she gently placed the clothes she brought out of her room on the table in front of him, “I brought some stuff from the house over here and some of it belonged to you. You have to get out of those clothes before you catch a cold.”

 

“No,” He wasn't going to stay here any longer than he had to. As soon as the storm let up he would just walk back to the apartment and it was likely he'd leave even if it didn't, “I won't be here that long.”

 

Kodama walked away from the table and opened the refrigerator, “Why did you get in the car if you didn't want to come?”

 

“You said you were taking me home.” Shinji shot back, recalling when she offered to give him a ride.

 

“I said I was going home.” The dark haired woman slammed the refrigerator closed before she looked over her shoulder, “Just say it if you want to.”

 

“I don't know what you are talking about.” Her company responded all too quickly.

 

Annoyed, Kodama turned around knowing exactly what he had on his mind, “I know you hate what happened. I know that you probably hate me Shinji but, if you want to think that way, then it was your fault as much as-“

 

He slammed his hand on the table, his indifference lost as she brought up something he spent many nights trying to forget. Enraged, he abruptly stood up and knocked over the chair he was sitting in, “How can you say that it was my fault!?”

 

“Because I can't fucking have sex by myself Shinji!” The normally calm woman exclaimed as their tempers started to flare, their words only adding fuel to the fire, “It's not my fault that you didn't say no!”

 

“I never said yes!” He retorted.

 

“Look!” Kodama marched up to him, the recipe she was going to use for dinner now forgotten, “You just don't want to admit that you hurt her!”

 

He glared at her, his blue eyes burning with a fire that couldn't be put out, “Shut up!”

 

It was an exchange they should have had a long time ago, an argument that should have been resolved before that. Something that shouldn't have happened did and they could never change that. The time they should have spent conversing was already gone, the compromise they should have grasped now long out of reach.

 

“Hikari died!!” Shinji yelled, “How can you stand talking about this after she just got buried!?” He fumed, still furious that she brought up the one thing he never ever wanted to talk about again for the rest of his life.

 

“I know that she died! She was important to me too!” She spun around, too angry too even face him, “Don't try to make me feel bad because you're incompetent.”

 

“What did you say?”

 

“Exactly what you heard me say, you're an incompetent pilot.”

 

“I'm the only pilot now.” Shinji said, making sure to stress only as he spoke, “I haven't seen any of your paintings save anyone Kodama.”

 

“That's pretty funny because I was drawing some inspiration for a piece I'll call I'm about to beat your-“

 

The lights in her apartment flashed off and back on before finally going out. With their bad luck hopefully at its end, the two stayed silent where they stood as it dawned on them that the power was out.

 

They stood in the darkness as they reflected on what was said, the occasional strike of lightning illuminating the room long enough for them to see each other. Even if their anger started to subside, the grave they both saw earlier today was proof that someone they both loved was lost forever.

 

Arguing over things like who was at fault was pointless…

 

“You should have left with your father.” Shinji was the first to speak, his words missing the edge they had not more than minutes ago.

 

“He begged me to come with him but,” Kodama blew a stray strain of hair out of her face as Shinji bent over to pick up the chair he knocked down, “I told him there was someone here that needed me.”

 

It was no secret who she was talking about as he dropped back into the seat he was sitting in, “You should have left anyway, your family is more important…”

 

“Ha,” Kodama chuckled and he could easily picture the expression on her face as she felt around on the table for her cell phone, “I at least expected you to be grateful.”

 

“You should be the person trying to get away from me the most Kodama.”

 

The lights flashed and the older woman smiled as they stayed on, “I'll never hate you if that's what you're thinking.” She admitted as she grabbed her cell phone in case the power went out again. Her smile started to fade, “I didn't really mean to say you were incompetent...”

 

What could she do about something that was completely out of his control? How could get angry at him for giving it his all? To this day she remembered when he held back tears as he told her and Hikari what happened to their little sister. Nozomi was on the other side of the city, her field trip interrupted by the tenth Angel.

 

He explained that what they thought were bombs were actually pieces of the Angel that were dropped in an attempt to correct its aim. Their sister and everyone in a two mile radius were incinerated, never to know what hit them.

 

Kodama pulled back a chair and took a seat at the table opposite the pilot, staring at him as he continued to look at the rain. The lost of her little sister hit everyone hard, everyone except his girlfriend who took it in stride.

 

Hikari was determined to support her boyfriend, the tears she would have shed for her sister never came out. The freckled girl who had the strength to smile successfully managed to comfort her heartbroken boyfriend.

 

Kodama; however, was only a spectator, someone who stood on the sideline as the depressing line of events started with the death of her youngest sister. She could only watch as they struggled to cope with things that could break the toughest of people.

 

“I'm sorry about that,” Kodama whispered as she clutched the cell phone she held, “I've just been kind of tense lately...”

 

“Me too…” Shinji remarked, the reasons obvious. He glanced at her and she looked back at him, again they held eye contact until he turned away.

 

They couldn't deny that they were attracted to each other.

 

He was always so lost… the common things people often took for granted were things he never had or experienced. She was tired of being surrounded by people as jaded as her and she took comfort in his lack of understanding how the world really was.

 

She was very pretty and wasn't modest about it. Even if he never said it outright, he always wanted people to be there for him and she always seemed to be present when he needed someone.

 

It was a relationship that could never be the way she wanted it to be, a friendship that he often thought about but one person would always be between them.

 

Kodama quietly observed him as he leaned back in the chair. It wasn't hard to imagine who he was thinking about.

 

Hikari…

 

“Do you remember when it started?” She smiled despite the bittersweet memory, “When I answered the door you almost collapsed on me.”

 

It wasn't like he could forget. He somehow maintained his composure when Nozomi died but when Touji was… killed he couldn't help it seeing that he was right there when it happened. He was going to run away… Run away from everything but he had to let Hikari know the truth.

 

His girlfriend wasn't there and the only person that was opened the door for him. Exhausted partly from the running but mainly because of what happened to one of his friends, the pilot fell into the arms that were held out for him.

 

Yes, that was when it started.

 

Kodama let go of her sarcastic remarks and nonchalant attitude to listen to everything he had to say. They talked for hours and, when they were finished, he made up his mind that he wasn't going anywhere as long as the Angels attacked.

 

“We should have just left it at that…” Shinji replied with a distant look in his eyes.

 

“I didn't want to.” She said softly as another flash of lighting appeared in the night sky, thunder following not soon afterwards, “I wanted a small part of you Shinji… I didn't want to take you from Hikari or anything. I just wanted to be close to you too.”

 

She fell in love with her sister's boyfriend.

 

Of course, it was wrong but she couldn't help how she felt. For the first time in her entire life, she met someone who she honestly wanted to be with but his heart already belonged to her sister.

 

“I didn't know it then but I was jealous of Hikari.” Kodama continued, having no reason to hide her feelings now, “Ha, I was so confused that I remember crying because I didn't know what to do.”

 

“Kodama…”

 

She wiped at her eye before a tear threatened to come down, “I never meant to make her sad… I just wanted to be happy too.”

 

“I know you didn't mean to hurt her.” Shinji said, offering his comforting words in an attempt to make her feel better.

 

“I don't regret it…”

 

“What?”

 

“Sleeping with you.” Kodama replied, her blunt words matching the stern expression on her face. The look in her eyes told him what she didn't have the heart to say, that she held dear the day that he regretted so much.

 

Shinji stood up and pushed the chair back under the table. The dejected look on his face left a dent in her heart, her feelings more than just hurt as he walked towards the front door.

 

Kodama bumped into the table in her haste to get up and managed to grab his arm before he got away. She didn't mean to upset him when she said it. She was letting him know that it meant that much to her, “What are you doing?”

 

“I'm leaving.”

 

The dent in her heart became the hole his words shot through, the effect they had on her obvious as her grip loosened enough for him to slide his arm out of her grasp. Shocked, she could only watch as he walked to the door.

 

Without a goodbye.

 

“Where will you go?”

 

“I don't know…”

 

She wouldn't make him stay against his will but she had to know. She needed to know why he treated with such disdain, why was it so hard for him to just come out and say it if he didn't feel the same way, “Why?”

 

“I can't look at you anymore.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Every time I look at you… Every time I hear your voice all I can think about is that night.” Shinji closed his eyes and tried to remember the way he used to think of the immature woman that used to enjoy teasing him, “I don't want to think of you that way.”

 

“We can do other things…” She weakly responded.

 

“You don't understand.” Shinji sighed as he motioned to unlock the door, reaching to slip his shoes on as he spoke, “I can't-“

 

“Be with you because you're not Hikari.” Kodama muttered, finishing his sentence for him. His hand fell off the doorknob, her accusation not too far from the truth.

 

It was true that she couldn't replace her sister and she didn't want to. Hikari was a completely different person, someone that she knew Shinji looked up to more than anyone else. That was one of the many reasons his infidelity crushed him and she played a role in his ruin.

 

That day she took advantage of him… The moment he landed in her arms she knew that she never wanted to let him go. Depressed over the death of a friend, she was the only one there to comfort him and she did. That evening she wasn't just the older sister of his girlfriend or the charming girl that enjoyed messing with him.

 

She was someone that cared.

 

“How… No, why did you tell her?”

 

“I didn't.” Shinji answered, “She already knew.”

 

Kodama tried to speak but nothing came out. Speechless, she raked her mind trying to think of how Hikari found out but finding nothing.

 

“Hikari,” Shinji paused, sighing before he continued, “She said she could tell something happened when you stopped talking to her… That something was off when you stopped bothering me all the time.”

 

The pilot stared at the door, trembling as he spoke, “She told me to leave her alone.”

 

That was the last thing she ever said to him.

 

The scar that was left on his conscious was one that would never heal. He messed up and the last thing she said to him was something that sad, “I deserved it.” Shinji thought out loud before he sneezed, “I'm sorry for getting mad at you. I-“

 

Kodama recovered from the shock and interrupted him the best way she could. Her arms tenderly wrapped around the boy she loved before she pulled him closer to her. She embraced the pilot from behind and, despite his mixed feelings, he couldn't say that he disliked it.

 

“You should have just told me you were cold…”

 

Shinji found he had nothing to say as he found relief in the first hug he got since his girlfriend died but the fact he was still here spoke volumes to the woman that held him.

 

“Come on, we have to get you out of those clothes okay?” Kodama waited for him to nod before she let go of him, “You don't have anything to apologize but just make sure you don't make fun of my art again or something bad might happen to you.” She playfully voiced, her usual vigor returning in spite of what happened.

 

Somewhere in his pool of self pity he forgot that Kodama was in pain as much as he was if not more. In hopes of making him feel better she masked her feelings and traded them in for a veil of elation so hollow that it pained him to look at her empty smile.

 

As Kodama loosed and untied his tie, he wondered if she knew that her sister did the same exact thing she was doing now. Those smiles tainted with grief as she tried her hardest to suppress how she really felt.

 

She reached for the buttons on his shirt but he stilled her hand with his touch. Shinji took off his shirt himself and threw it on top of the tie she discarded on the floor, “Kodama…”

 

“I love you.”

 

It was easy to say, something he had no trouble at all admitting. The artist blushed as the pilot suddenly came forward with his feelings but his downcast expression told her the things he was about to voice in advance.

 

“But,” Shinji turned away from the clothes on the table and looked at the woman before him, the woman who sacrificed her safety to be here, “I can't stop thinking about Hikari...”

 

He adverted his eyes hoping his honest words didn't hurt her feelings but his honesty was one of the things that she appreciated, one of the things that attracted her to him, “Do you remember what I asked you at the cemetery?”

 

“I probably can't make you happy but I can make you feel good for sure…” Again, her face started to take on a cherry hue, the blush spreading across her cheeks, “I want you to know that I'll always be there for you, that I love you too.”

 

She said it and she would say it as many times as she needed to. This boy that was almost half her age was someone important to her, someone that was more precious than anything and it was only then that he noticed something he overlooked.

 

Her dress was just as wet as the shirt he took off and the pants he had on. She stood in the rain just as long as he did, pulling her umbrella out for his sake…

 

She was just as cold as he was.

 

“I'll go get you a towel…” She rushed off to her room, searching more for a way to calm down instead of a way for him to dry off.

 

She quickly walked passed him before walking into her room, her slight embarrassment nothing compared to the feelings of her company. She asked him to take her for granted, something he could never do again. There was a very good chance that this could be the last time he ever saw her… There was a very good chance that he could die, that anyone could die.

 

“Here!” A hand clutching a towel appeared from the doorway of her room, “I found it.”

 

The sound of her voice compounded that fact as he walked towards her. Without thinking, he reached out and touched her hand causing her to drop the towel as she walked out of the room, “S-Shinji?”

 

His head pressed into her chest as he hugged her, “You were cold too…”

 

It was the same…

 

From his dazed expression, the look in his eyes telling her that he was more than just lost to the way he held her, his arms so tight around her that it was difficult to move.

 

“You were cold too…” He repeated, his dismay reason for one to think that it was a startling revelation which it was. Everyone left, the city practically a ghost town thanks to the explosion that took away not only a good deal of Tokyo-3 but also his girlfriend and Ayanami. The people that were left behind misunderstood him to the point of thinking he was fine, an assumption that was far from right.

 

Only one person could understand how he felt and he alienated her, even insulted her.

 

Ignorant… He was always so ignorant. It was only when it was too late that he could see things for what they really were.

 

Hikari's smiles were her gifts, the only thing she could offer to help him with his day fearing that anything more would be a bother. She purposely placed herself second to his piloting, her love coming in the form of quiet support.

 

She died not only disappointed in her boyfriend but aware of his constant failures, each encounter with an Angel more difficult and dangerous than the last.

 

The lips that pressed against his own roused him from his musings, his realizations fading as Kodama kissed him. It was feather light, the force that would have been behind it replaced with the affection that filled her heart. Reluctantly, she backed away. The kiss too light to even be called that still fresh on both of their minds as she gave him enough time to turn her down, a chance to just leave it at that.

 

A similar situation…

 

She was concerned. Her brown eyes overflowing with emotions that she wouldn't reveal, telling him things that were too hard for her to say. She waited on him, her invitation one he didn't have to take.

 

Any way you looked at it, it was wrong…

 

No, it was more than wrong. Not even one day since Hikari was buried and he was ready to give in to temptation, to find warmth in the comfort she could provide.

 

“I understand if you don't want to.” Kodama whispered, living with the guilt he constantly experienced, “You-“

 

The hug she slipped out of to kiss him paled in comparison to the way he desperately grabbed her dress, his head bowed as he gave in to sin once more, “Please…”

 

He had a habit of failing to meet the expectations people placed on him, the burdens he strived to carry getting heavier with every disappointment. The faith countless people invested in him was lost, his self loathing leading him astray.

 

“Shinji…” The lone person that accepted him with all his regrets and failures quietly spoke his name and got his attention. She took him by the hand and led him into her room, the dim lamp showing him the contents of it. It was surprising that the one usually so neat had paintings, sketches, and brushes littered around the room but neither had reason to take note of that as they sat on the bed.

 

The pilot said nothing, once again consumed by the guilty feelings that plagued him for so long. Kodama placed her hand on top of his knowing exactly what he needed, “It's not wrong.” She declared, not having to think hard to know what he had on his mind.

 

“I know you're trying as hard as you can Shinji and,” She rubbed her hand around in his hair, his brown locks still somewhat damp, “No matter what happens you will always be my favorite.”

 

The hand once tangled in his hair drifted down to the side of his face. She teased him, her kiss planted on the corner of his mouth but her tongue darting out to part his lips, “I love you…” She cooed, her support not only coming in the form of her true feelings.

 

Kodama closed her eyes as they tasted each other, their mouths interlocking as she kissed him. Shinji finally relaxed, his tongue granting her the access she wanted. With the feeling of her lips pressed against his and her tongue in his mouth there were more things than intimacy being shared between the two.

 

He confided in her and no one else, that fact made evident by how he held her as they kissed. He decided, with a heavy heart, that it could only be her now… That he could only rely on her.

 

She said it wasn't wrong but that didn't necessarily mean it was right either. She betrayed her sister in hopes of playing a bigger role in her boyfriend's life, something that was unforgivable no matter the circumstances. The family she had long since learned not to take for granted just one of the many things she let go of for his sake.

 

Kodama abruptly broke the kiss before she reached behind her back and pulled down the zipper. Her skin seemed to glow as the front of the sleeveless dress slumped forward and exposed her breasts.

 

His eyes instantly locked onto her chest and he motioned to touch her but he hesitated just long enough for his partner to notice his pause. She smiled if only to make him more comfortable, to show him that he was free to do as he pleased.

 

So he did.

 

His touch was faint, almost like his fingertips were gliding across her skin. Then he grabbed her. He took hold of her in his hand, cupping it as his thumb rubbed her nipple. It felt the same. So firm and full, the nipple already becoming stiff thanks to his attention.

 

This time he kissed her.

 

Her bare back met the bed, the screeching of the bedsprings going up and down unable to stop him from kissing the side of her neck. Kodama's heart started to beat faster as he fondled her, molding her breast as his line of kisses went up her neck.

 

The anticipation was as heavy. The wait for things to happen started to make the hair on the back of her neck stand up but he kept his leisurely pace. He hiked her dress up to her waist as his hand moved up her leg, his loving caress mirrored in the way he kissed her.

 

Did he know how many times she daydreamed about this? Did he have any idea how many times she touched herself with him in mind? Even if he didn't, his kiss did… He kissed her with abandon. Everything that was on him mind before their lips locked was gone aside from her.

 

It felt so good…

 

His hand tenderly rubbed at her side just so he could feel her smooth skin and explore her curves. He pinched her nipple just hard enough for her to appreciate the sensation as they kissed. He removed his mouth from hers, the trail of salvia between their lips proof of their connection.

 

She stared into the eyes of the boy above her before placing a hand on his chest. Knowing what she wanted, he moved and she got off the bed. In one swift movement, the dress fell to the floor and left her clad only in panties.

 

Shinji's tee shirt and slacks fell into a pile near her clothes. Kodama could feel herself growing more excited as she looked at what he hid under his pants, the thought of pulling back his boxers enough to make her feel hot.

 

She crawled back onto the bed and tugged at his underwear, easing them down until she freed his erection. He groaned as she wrapped her hand around his shaft but, for him, she would do more than that.

 

The hand she delicately handled him with led his dick into her mouth. Her tongue slid under his dick, her lips making the passage feel that much tighter before she made her way down his length.

 

Her hand moved to his balls as he moaned, her lips meeting the base of his shaft as she took all of him into her mouth again and again, “K-Kodama,” He stuttered, the feeling of her tongue swirling around the tip of dick making it too difficult to remember what he wanted to say as he moaned.

 

He didn't have to say it felt good. The white that splashed on the back of her throat let her know how much he enjoyed it. More of his seed squirted into her mouth and she coaxed as much out of him as she could before she willingly swallowed it with a smile.

 

She removed her lips from his dick but her hand stayed, slowly going up and down to renew his erection. She was amused to see that he still wasn't quite over his orgasm but, with her words, came promise that another one wasn't too far away.

 

“Since I kissed you,” Kodama whispered, her voice easily getting through his daze, “I wanted to feel you in me…”

 

He couldn't take his eyes off the semen on the side of her mouth, his essence left on her pretty face before her tongue licked it up. She made no mention of it as she continued to slowly stroke him, her hand pressed into the bed as she boldly leaned forward and placed her lips closer to his ear, “I want you inside me.” Softly, she whispered the truth that was conveyed with her desire and it got the effect she wanted when his erection was revived.

 

With a heavenly smile, she spread her arms and wrapped them around the boy before she once again fell back on the bed. She was his angel without wings, unable to deliver him from this life he hated but…

 

Kodama laughed, her amusement rooted in her disbelief but blooming thanks to how much she enjoyed just being this close to him. She released all her prior frustrations the only way she knew how, temporarily removing herself from the things that depressed her as she stared up into blue eyes.

 

She was still Kodama. The older sister who loved to laugh, the artist who valued her expression, the girl who always held out a hand for him…

 

The woman that loved him this much.

 

“I can't keep a straight face while saying stuff like that.” The dark haired woman admitted amidst giggles.

 

Shinji smiled, something he didn't do in a long time. Her laughter slowly died down as her heart was warmed by the sight. He looked her in the eyes as his face started to color, “Do you want me…”

 

He trailed off, his question unasked as she shook her head before he was finished, “I meant what I said.” Kodama replied, knowing he understood as he scooted back.

 

With room to move, she sat up and started to pull down her panties. She smiled as he watched her remove her last article of clothing but the satin that moved down her legs could only hold his attention for so long.

 

He was openly looking between her legs, starting at what was so private.

 

Kodama threw her panties across the room with no concern to where they landed before she laid back down. She parted the folds of his sex with her fingers, showing him what he wanted to see.

 

He started to breathe harder, the sight making his erection as hard as ever. He moved and she shuddered as his dick rubbed against her thigh, the promise of sex made when he dipped into her.

 

Words to describe the experience started to whirl around in his mind but the feeling itself blocked any attempt at logic as he slid into her. She softly whimpered, the sudden thrust taking any attempt to speak from her.

 

He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding as savored the feeling. She was so wet… He could see her labia glistening when she took off her panties but what made him let go of his shaky breath was how tight she was. She rocked her hips, forcefully taking in the rest of his length.

 

“So… good…” Kodama huffed out, propping herself up with her elbows so she could see him fully buried inside her. She was filled with him, his groan letting her know that he was enjoying this just as much as she was.

 

It was just as she said as he started to pull out, the friction he felt thanks to the snug fit. He started to enter her but this time they both watched his length slowly disappear into her.

 

Slow.

 

The word by itself meant nothing but when she applied to his pace it meant so much more. The way his kisses took so long to get to her lips, they way his hands roamed her body like he had no destination in mind… The way he penetrated her, making every stroke mean something but she had no qualms when he started to speed up.

 

His lust compelled him to give her what she craved and he did.

 

He rammed into her, the sounds that came from their meeting enough to send her into frenzy. That wet smacking she heard every time he plowed into her was a sound that drove her crazy but that wasn't the only sound that came with their love making.

 

The bedsprings screamed as she caught his rhythm and flowed with it. The feeling of him giving her want she wanted made it feel like another one of her fantasies but the sounds they were making guaranteed that it was real. Kodama never tried to keep them to herself, her throaty moans and pleasure filled cries always leaving him wanting to hear more.

 

His heavy breathing punctuated by groans was what she focused on and hearing that let her know she wasn't alone in her pleasure... The feeling of something wet going down her chest put her on edge but it was when his tongue met her nipple that she could feel herself falling off.

 

Shinji stayed deep inside her as he gently sucked on her nipple. He removed his lips, the moisture he left combined with the feeling of him starting to pull out of her again. She closed her eyes and started to sink into the sensation, knowing that her orgasm wasn't far away.

 

“Do… Do you want to do it like last time?”

 

Shinji whispered the question but the blissful look on her face already told him the answer. He slid out of her and rolled over to lie on her stomach. She crawled to the head of the bed ready for him to make it better than it was the first time they did it.

 

He remembered her favorite position.

 

Ragged breaths were shared between them as he entered her from behind. The sound of sex returned, that wet sounds of him driving his length into her one of the reasons she felt like she was overflowing.

 

Kodama rested her head on top of her hair that pooled under her, strains of it matted to her face. She was starting to feel less and less attached to the things around her. All she could focus on was how good it felt… The feeling that continued to build with every thrust, the sensation that kept growing every time she remembered that this was something he only did with her.

 

A muffled gasp into the pillow was what marked her arrival at her peak. Her orgasm caught her by surprise but she fell into it peacefully, accepting the pleasure that overwhelmed her.

 

Kodama smiled as she panted.

 

She was happy, completely satisfied as she regains her senses.

 

Shinji was sweating as he motioned to pull out before it was too late but she wasn't having any of that. With half-lidded eyes she looked up at him with the radiate smile she still had on her face, “I want it...” Was the only thing she was able to say, the lingering feelings of her climax still heavy on her.

 

He gave her what she wanted when his seed shot into her. Nothing could rouse her from the euphoria as he pulled out, some of his semen following as it trickled out.

 

Shinji watched the thick gobs of white go down her thigh, some of it caught in her pubic hair. Kodama raised her head off the bed and turned to face him, “It feels so much better without a condom doesn't it?” Her question more of a statement that came with one of her lazy grins.

 

Even now, she was stunning.

 

It wasn't the kind of beauty one could attain with make up and clothes but a natural one, a beauty she had when she was just waking up or before she got ready for work. Kodama was unaware of his thoughts as she placed her head on his chest, resting on him as he laid down.

 

Gradually, reality started to set in.

 

The storm outside continued unabated, the relentless rain still easy to hear. His pants left mud on the floor and a bit on the bed. Her cell phone was ringing, most likely his guardian calling her back.

 

Not soon after that, his phone started to ring but they ignored it. They ignored all of it.

 

Kodama knew this didn't change anything. Sex was just sex. Them being together like this didn't magically mean he could stop piloting and live with her. It didn't mean that he would see her the way she wanted him to.

 

“Kodama…” Shinji stared at the ceiling as he placed his hand on her head, tangling his fingers in the silky black that was her hair, “I won't let you down.”

 

A promise he would keep even at the cost of his life. His words not only entailed his mission to destroy any threat to Tokyo-3 but that he wouldn't mistreat her no matter what.

 

Even now, he was serious.

 

He was the kind of person that could never completely relax. He bound by the pressure to perform, the need to act. The stress he endured came from not only his job but from nearly every aspect of his life.

 

“I know.”

 

That was all that needed to be said. Shinji was someone who feared disappointing people. Every failure was something that scarred him. Although she acknowledged his resolve with simple words, her devotion was something he would always have.

 

The pilot looked at the canvas next to their clothes and broke the silence that descended on them, “Is that suppose to- Oww!”

 

Kodama pinched his cheek and stretched it, “Ha, I wasn't joking when I said don't make fun of my art.” The artist said dangerously before letting go.

 

“I really don't know what it is.” Shinji replied as he rubbed his face.

 

“A tree.”

 

His eyes started to water as he took another look at the painting and turned away from her, “W-Why… does it have legs?”

 

She pouted as he started to laugh but she was honestly glad that he did. With a sly smile, she picked up one of the brushes she had on the floor, “I'll give you something to laugh about.”

 

Indeed, both of them had something to laugh at as she put a broad stripe of red down his chest. Quickly finding a brush of his own, Shinji put an orange circle on her shoulder and their misuse of paint started.

 

However, they didn't forget. They could never forget the things that happened but they could at least pretend for a while even just for a night that everything was alright. Tonight, she could laugh like she did before the Angels started attacking and he could have the fun he rarely had.

 

Shinji laughed out loud as he gave his lover a blue moustache to match with his red goatee but he couldn't help but double over in laughter after she dabbed her brush on his chest.

 

Some laughs…

 

That was what she gave him, something that he could get from anyone.

 

She knew how much it meant to be able to make someone laugh, to actually see the light hearted sound rid someone of sadness but it was meager compared to Hikari's understanding.

 

“Thank you.”

 

The older woman snapped out of her thoughts as she realized how close he was to her. He didn't have to thank her for anything, a fact she was about to voice until he hugged her again.

 

Somewhere in the middle of hoping he couldn't tell how hollow she felt since this was the best she could do, she almost forgot something important. His smiles, his laughs, his touch…

 

She smiled, `His lie…'

 

Kodama felt like laughing at herself. She almost missed what she was looking for and he told her so many times without having to actually say it. There were hard times but being with him made her happy.

 

She decided that answering the phone and cleaning up could wait as she looked down at Shinji, his smile still in place as he started to fall asleep, knowing that he felt the same way.

 

The End

 

Author's note: Of course, this was supposed to be in the contest with some of the other stories you see but some things came up and I missed the deadline. ;_; Nevertheless, I wouldn't have won anyway. ;_; Lara had the best story in my opinion and came in last. If that's the case then I'm already in last before the next contest even starts. >_<

 

To talk about the story though, it kind of suffers from the same problem my Nightshift chapters do. It almost seems like I pulled this out of a full length story as opposed to just being a one shot and, like always, the sex is always tacked on if you know what I mean. Writing this stuff would be so much easier without it but it wouldn't be a lemon then no? Other than that, I fear that some of my key points in this story may be too subtle. The story is a bit cheesy also but I'm becoming more and more critical of myself.

 

Either way, thanks for reading everyone. I got some other stuff to write while I got the time.

 

CF