Original Poetry Fan Fiction ❯ Words ❯ Monday ( Chapter 36 )

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One of my earlier attempts at mixing rhyme with free verse...I was a noob. So sue me! LOL!

Rating: All Audiences
Genre: Um...search me.

Miscellaneous: Original Poetry Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Psychological / Hentai / Drama / Romance / Angst | Type: Self Insertion | Uploaded On: 04.09.2008 | Pages: 2 | Words: 2.4K | Visits: 297 | Status: Completed

Monday

by iloveanimecartoons

Original September 12, 1998

Revision February 22, 2008

Monday, September 12, 1998

Mr. Man of the Hour,

How ya been?

Haven't written back to you since…who knows when…

I hope you have been well.

My life is a mixture of heaven and hell

My life, as usual, has been a constant test of wills, wherein I'm constantly trying to place faith over stress.

Basically, my life is a mess

In other words, I'm stressed out, but The Creator loves me, so I try to have more and more faith ever day that everything's gonna be alright.

Yeah…alright…

I got your letter yesterday—it was a doozy. As usual, you have given me something to think about.

I'll be contemplating your words for a good while. Of that, I have no doubt.

How my simple sentences make you see so many extra things, I will never know.

I suppose I should be flattered. Hmmm…I dunno…

Just remember this line: Don't read too deeply into my words—you'll either assume wrong or lose your mind trying to be correct.

You make me a bit confuzzled but that's okay. Nobody's perfect.

Your last two letters gave impression that you're somewhat interested in being with me.

If I'm wrong, let me know…but, if I'm right, there are some things you need to know.

You may not believe it but you don't need a woman like me in your life—I know this to be true.

To be honest, I've got my own drama—me being in your life…that wouldn't be fair to you.

Not right now, anyway…

You want to be involved and I'm not ready.

So, no, we can't `go steady'.

You want children—I can't say the same.

My own psyche's enough of a challenge—I'm not looking for little ones to tame.

I'm very used to being alone—love scares me.

I'm not ready to take any chances with my heart right now; plus there's my added responsibilities.

So, there isn't much room in my life, or my heart, for anyone else—you're not the only one.

I don't want you to get your hopes up high and get yourself hurt; I mean, I do believe in fate but I also believe that fate should never be pushed.

In you, I have such a good friend and I really don't want to lose that—I do care about you and your feelings, okay?

This is not a Dear John Letter of any sort…I want you in my life, just, well, sometimes I feel that we're not on the same page.

I want you in my Book of Life but, for this to be so, we must always stay on the same page—stand on the same stage.

That means, take my words for what they are, believe in me when I say I want you in my life, and let's keep it real—I always have.

I can't control your thoughts or your feelings so I can't guarantee these words, this request, will hold water for you.

I just implore you to respect my wishes while, at the same time, realize that I'm concerned for your feelings, as well.

In the 2nd letter I got from you, you wrote, “A wise enemy is better than an ignorant friend”.

You also wrote that you wanted me to become less ignorant to my feelings and more expressive than yours.

Those two sentences baffled me.

At this time in my life, I guess I'm just not that deep.

Please write back explaining them.

I don't feel it is appropriate to seal our relationship with a kiss—we're FRIENDS.

Not dating, not lovers, and not involved—FRIENDS

You'll get it one day.

And, one more thing, I HATE sweet connotations like baby, sweetheart, My Dearest, honey, sweetie, darling, etc…please respect that.

Was that last letter on fax?

I want to go to Red Lobster next week and don't be cheap about it, man!

Then, I want a new wardrobe—just give me your credit card or bank account #, men never know what to get anyway (they just get in my way, so stay home).

I need my hair, nails and toes done—that'll be about 150 more, okay?

Oh yeah, I want 200, in small bills no larger than 20 each, and I want it by Thursday.

And you'd better be prompt!!

Just kidding!

I just wanted to write something to you, for once, that would give you the same jaw-dropping affect as all of your letters.

Did I scare ya? I imagine no…I think you know me better.

I'm pretty sure that this entire letter has been a bit much to handle.

Read it again and try to see the good in it.

It all needed to be said.

I'm not mad at you in any way, so, don't think that.

I just wanted to be honest and I hope that you can respect that.

Peace & Love. Please write back soon.

Your Friend,