Original Stories Fan Fiction ❯ A Matter Of Choice ❯ Forbidden Love ( Chapter 34 )

Forbidden Love

 

Throbbing. Blearily Tegan opened her eyes trying to localise the sensation. She stretched and found her legs stiff and sore. Slowly the events of the previous night came back to her. Stretching hurt, but getting up was necessary. She sat up rubbing her eyes and swung her legs over the edge of the bed. The throbbing grew stronger. It was only as she stood that she realised how stiff she was. Oh for fuck's sake Torin, was that really necessary? She took a deep breath and walked stiffly to the kitchen. As she got herself a drink she knew she couldn't go out tonight. She was in no state for it; she would just have to wait until the stiffness went. Damn that was another few days without hunting.

 

She walked into the bathroom, and started to run herself a bath. She decided to get on and do some of the chores since there was nothing better to do that night. She put on the washing machine while letting the bath run. She picked up a clean change of clothes, picking a pair of denim shorts to try and save her sore thighs. Pulling off her pyjamas she slipped into the balmy water with a sigh. The warmth stung a little but was soothing to the raw skin. She soaked for a while, taking a little time to pamper herself. It was not often that she managed to do something for herself. It was only as the water began to grow cold that she got out of the bath.

 

She dressed, brushing out her wet hair. Her legs no longer felt quite so stiff but she was still sore. She bustled around the apartment, thinking about last night. Their intimate moment was only one thing in a line of things that bothered her about Torin. Never once had they really fought. Never once had he made an attempt on her life. Even in the beginning, he had not let her come to harm, not even surrounded by vampires. He had always protected her from the impulses of others. Only a few months ago in the hospital, the way he had sat and talked with her all night. He could have so easily taken her; she was completely at his mercy.

 

The whole thing bothered her; it seemed so unnatural. She also doubted that she was entirely herself. Just how much would he have to nudge her for her to notice? Certainly she had noticed it when Demetriov did it, he was anything but subtle. Even if he had it was benign, but at the same time perhaps it could be seen as taking advantage. But what bothered her most was that she found herself liking him. When it came down to it, she knew that the desire for that contact had been her own. She was desperately lonely, and the intimate contact had been an element of her life that she had missed dearly. After feeling isolated for so long it had been intoxicating.

 

She wondered if she had been a fool. She had enjoyed the whole thing entirely too much. She even enjoyed their little repartee, all apart from the one thing that was keeping her at home that night. The thought of how he had thrashed her still made her face redden. Even the thought of it was humiliating. She preferred not to dwell on the situation at all. Thinking about it raised more questions and her feelings on the matter were blurry at best. She sighed and began to hang out her laundry. It was a boring job, but it needed to be done. A knock on the door roused her from her thoughts. Who on earth could it be? She never had company.

 

She limped to the door quickly and peered though the spy hole. She was shocked to see Torin waiting patiently in the corridor. She quickly unfastened the locks and the chain.

 

“Tegan…” Torin started.

 

“Torin.” Tegan cut him short. “What the fuck are you doing in my hall way?”

 

She wasn't sure what annoyed her most, the fact that it was Torin, or the fact that the location of her home was now known by at least one vampire.

 

“I uh…”

 

He looked at the floor; the end of his shoes had suddenly become extremely interesting. What the hell? Now he looked like an embarrassed schoolboy, what the hell was going on? Tegan heard a door opening down the corridor. She groaned inwardly. The neighbours were spying on her again.

 

“You'd best come in.” She said resignedly.

 

Oh fuck this went against her better judgement but she was in a tight spot. Well she was pretty sure he wouldn't kill her, and she had an arsenal of weapons hidden all over the apartment if he did decide to try something on. Well she had to hope that her gut instincts about him were right.

 

“What!” Torin was incredulous, he just could not believe that she would do such a thing.

 

“I said you'd better come in.” She said annoyed.

 

Torin started to splutter, completely aghast.

 

“Get in!”

 

“But…”

 

She grabbed hold of his arm and yanked him inside.

 

“Come on! For fuck's sake. The neighbours already watch my every move.”

 

Oh she really could do without that kind of trouble. There had already been one petition about getting her out of the block due to her very irregular habits, and on occasion she had been caught with blood on her clothes. Trying to brush it off as a mugging had not washed with her more distrusting neighbours.

 

“I didn't realise that you were so interesting.” He chuckled as she pushed him into the front room.

 

“Well my life is hardly normal is it?” She snapped, more than a little annoyed at him for putting her in this position.

 

“I guess not.”

 

He stood looking around the apartment like a lost lamb. She closed and locked the door as he took in what had been her home for four years.

 

“Not bad. The building looks shabbier on the outside.”

 

“Are you going to sit down?” Tegan asked. “Or are you going to stand around and chat about the décor?” Okay so that had been snappy but at least she was remembering her manners. What, manners for a vampire, had she gone completely out of her mind?

 

“Oh.” He responded rather surprised at the invitation.

 

Torin looked around before deciding on the sofa and settling down. Tegan was somewhat puzzled. He was flustered, though her response to his visit had caused some of that; there was more to it. Why was he here? She wondered about a trap, but he would be a lot more confident than he appeared. He could be acting but she was sure he wouldn't deceive her. And she had seen a sample of his acting yesterday, while amusing it hadn't been that good. She thought back to the night before and wondered if that had spurred his visit. She limped across the room and sat at the opposite end of the sofa, she didn't want to get too close, and besides, she kept a katana hidden under that end. Torin couldn't help but look at the raw wounds on her thighs as she passed him.

 

“How are they?” He asked as she sat down.

 

“Hmm? Oh the legs. Stiff and sore; the reason I'm not kicking your ass.” She muttered. “I would if it didn't hurt so much to move them.” She said in all seriousness.

 

“I get the picture.”

 

“Torin.” Tegan began.

 

“Hmm?” He answered, his attention wandering a little.

 

“Why the fuck are you here?”

 

“Ah. Well that would be because of your legs. I…I mean that…that is I…”

 

Tegan looked at him incredulously, was he actually stumbling on his words like a nervous child? To say that the situation was bordering on the bizarre was an understatement. Nope this had gone straight through bizarre and was now just plain crazy. He caught her look and pulled himself together.

 

“Tegan, I wanted to apologise, you know, for what I did to you last night. It was cruel and mean and incredibly unfair of me.”

 

She had thought it before and she was thinking it again, what the fuck? This really couldn't be happening. He was apologising. She was expecting to see a flying pig any minute now. Hell she didn't know if she was amused or suspicious right now, possibly a mix of both.

 

“Uh huh, and what was I doing seconds later?” She asked him, eyeing him very warily, her hand slipping down the sofa so the katana was in easy reach.

 

“Pinning me to the wall from which I was unable to escape without beheading myself.”

 

“Precisely. So if I had wanted you dead you would be by now.” She pointed out.

 

“You don't want me dead?” He asked surprised.

 

“Well, I might do, I just don't like doing such things on impulse.”

 

Though if she was being truthful the idea of killing him was one she struggled with. It might be the fact that he wasn't out to kill her… well at least she didn't think he was. She kind of had an issue with killing someone who would not kill her. It seemed immoral. Shit, she was becoming delusional she was sure of it now.

 

“You're taking the piss aren't you?” He smirked.

 

“What the hell else am I supposed to do in this situation?”

 

He smiled at her.

 

“Torin, I do not get you. You are a joker, a prankster and a gentleman. Most of all you're nuts. Whoever heard of a vampire apologising for doing what comes naturally? How crazy is that? After all it's all part of the territory. I am starting to wonder if I am dreaming because this situation is so bizarre I am wondering if it can be real.”

 

“Believe me, I had a lot of time to think on things and I found I didn't like a lot of what happened last night.” Ah, now we were getting to the truth of the matter. “I have in general kept out of the way of hunters, only fighting them whenever I really had to. Hell I even fought some as a mortal man, God knows I was forever in trouble. But I have never fought a woman.” He answered quietly. “Look, for all my womanising in my youth, I believe women should be respected. After all they are intelligent, beautiful, beguiling young things.”

 

Tegan laughed. He was so sincere and sweet, it was almost cute. She relaxed a little, her hand sliding back into her lap; he was just being himself. A romantic fool, though she was not ready to trust him just yet.

 

“Tegan, you are the most eloquent and educated person I have ever met. Last night you awoke forgotten emotions in me, made me remember all the things I used to love with a passion. They seemed so insignificant alongside eternity. You made me realise I have this eternity to learn more than anyone else has ever learned. I have this wonderful opportunity and I am letting it slip by. You don't know how precious that realisation is to me Tegan.”

 

Tegan was somewhat stunned by his speech.

 

“I'm glad I helped.” She offered, rather confused if not flabbergasted to tell the truth.

 

“You have an education and it pains me to see it go to waste. Before all this, what did you want to do?”

 

Okay so in this odd situation this was taking an even odder turn. Well what harm could it do to answer him?

 

“I'll answer that if you promise not to laugh.” Torin nodded. “I loved literature and books. I was going to take an English degree, and then, I don't know, maybe teach the subject. How boring can a girl get?”

 

“No, no, no don't be silly.” He said eagerly, his expression brightening at her admission.

 

Tegan felt her face start to flush. To be honest, she was starting to feel a little uncomfortable with the situation. His enthusiastic compliments seemed a little out of place, but she knew they were completely honest and from the heart. He leaned over and took her hand in both of his. She couldn't help but notice the smoothness of his skin, the lack of heat. He felt like cool velvet. No, she had to stop thinking of him as anything other than a vampire. Truce or not that was what he was.

 

“Let me explain. In my time girls didn't know of education, most of the world was illiterate. Last night I met someone with the intelligence and passion that I have for literature. You are a smart, witty young woman, with intelligence that most men cannot hope to attain. Yet you are tough, filled with a gritty determination. You are certainly the most incredible woman I have ever met in my long life.”

 

Tegan was sure her face was scarlet. She couldn't deny the tension that had grown between them. Though out his passionate words she could see the way he was coming to feel about her. She could feel herself being drawn to him, to his passion. But it was wrong, all wrong. It couldn't be this way. Part of her problem was that as she recognised his feelings she found herself longing to feel his arms around her again, his lips against hers. Oh crap, how the hell could she be thinking about this? Stupid hormones, telling her she needed this. No she would not listen to her desires, she couldn't! Her chest felt tight, like she couldn't breathe. She snatched her hand away and got up.

 

“I need to get a drink.” She mumbled as she rushed away into the kitchen.

 

She got a glass of water, gulping it back, wiping sweat from her forehead. She leant against the work surface trying to make sense of it all. Was he trying to come on to her? The thought was terrifying and yet it set her heart racing in anticipation of what could be. No, she couldn't even contemplate it. What the hell was she thinking? He was a killer, a vampire, she mustn't forget that fact, no matter how decent he was to her. Oh she had let him get far too close to her already, and this truce of theirs was a big mistake. She should have beheaded him in that alley and have been done with it. Now her heart and her common sense were waging war with each other and she was so fucking confused.

 

She shuddered as she felt cool breath on the back of her neck. She whirled round to see Torin right behind her, lunging for a kitchen knife without thinking. He grabbed her wrist before she could reach it and trapped it behind her body, pressing his body into hers, deliberately trapping her, his fingers digging into her wrist as he held her there. Tegan was incredulous, her heart racing almost in a panic. Oh she had royally fucked up and now she was dead, that was for sure.

 

“Torin! I…”

 

“Shhh!” He put a finger to her lips. “Do you know how long it has been since I have had any sort of intimate contact with anyone?”

 

She swallowed hard as his finger traced the line of her jaw, as fingers caressed her trapped wrist. She was torn between her fear of him killing her or worse, and yet she was finding his close contact to her more than a little confusing. She took a deep breath, trying not to think about how good it felt to have his body pressed against her.

 

“It has been so long since I held anyone, kissed anyone. How long has it been for you?”

 

Her heart was pounding, her breathing heavy. She was trying to ignore the feelings their proximity was causing. It had been a long time and long forgotten emotions were being awakened in a flood of sensation. Fuck, her hormones were running riot and she was getting lost in a fog of tangled emotions and desires. The desire to kill him was still in there but it was steadily becoming quashed by other things.

 

“About four or five years.” She managed hoarsely, answering his question the only thing she could think of to do.

 

“I have waited a hundred and fifty.” He breathed softly.

 

He ran his fingers through her damp hair, tendrils rising into curls. Come on Tegan think! She had one hand free, surely she could get hold of a weapon of some kind. But she knew it was futile, everything was out of reach and they both knew it. Damn him!

 

“The sacrifices we have both made.” He sighed. “Kissing you last night, I felt young, alive again. And when you started to kiss me back, something long dead in me, rose from the ashes. I want to feel it again.”

 

“Torin…” She started to protest her voice thick with a rising arousal that she didn't want to admit to and couldn't control.

 

He leaned forward and started to kiss her jaw, Tegan gasping, slowly progressing his kisses to her throat. Oh it felt so good, even though he was holding her against his will. Wait was he in her mind pushing her into this. She cursed herself when she realised that what she was feeling was entirely her own response to his actions. Her eyes shot open as his kisses neared her neck in a sudden panic.

 

“Don't!” She cried, her voice a strangled sob of fear. “Not like this! Not when I invited you in. You can't kill me like this!”

 

She was shaking against him, on the verge of tears. Damn it, how the hell had she gotten herself into this mess? Oh she was seriously paying for her mistakes now, and yet under the fear there was this little voice telling her that he was sincere in his affection, that she should just let go. She wished it would fucking shut up.

 

“Oh Tegan.” He whispered, drawing her hair back from her throat. He stroked the still red scar gently. “I couldn't do that. How could I kill you when I'm falling for you?”

 

Tears began to roll down her cheeks, as she was overwhelmed by her emotions, fear, desire, anger, confusion all melding together and driving her crazy. Torin lifted her head up and kissed them away tenderly. He brought his lips to hers in a gentle, soft kiss. She tore her face away still trying to deny how she felt. She burned with desire, she couldn't deny it any longer, she wanted him so badly. She wanted to ravage him, to be ravaged and hell to the consequences, but she was also scared. She knew the usual fate of vampire's lovers and it was totally against her better judgement. But oh, how she wanted him. Damn her for craving this attention.

 

“Tegan?” His voice was soft, enticing, his fingers tracing circles over her hips, releasing her wrist now, as he felt that he was getting somewhere.

 

He hadn't even had to push her, she was coming round he could tell. It was in the flush of her cheeks, the quickening of her pulse he had felt at her wrist, the way she was breathing slightly harder. He was winning her over on his own and it thrilled him, starting to feel aroused by her reaction.

 

“I can't.” Came the strangled reply. She could hardly bring herself to look at him.

 

“But you want to.” He whispered in her ear, speaking to her darkest desires, starting to hope that his own might be fulfilled.

 

“God yes!”

 

He felt a surge of triumph at the confession. Now all he had to do was get her over that fear, get her over the edge and she could be his. Even if it was only for tonight he could live with that, he wanted her so badly right now. He stepped back, his hands sliding to her buttocks, bringing her with him. She found her hands sliding up his arms as he kneaded her buttocks, a soft moan escaping her throat at the pleasurable sensation on her loins pressing against him. Oh this couldn't be happening, this just couldn't be happening to her. He lifted her face to his.

 

“You want this don't you Tegan? You want it just as much as I do don't you?” His voice was thick, seductive, his green eyes mesmerising.

 

“Yes.” She whispered.

 

“Then say it.” He murmured his lips oh so close to hers.

 

Oh he was so close to her, and she hungered for another taste of him, to feel those lips against hers. And his eyes, oh those emerald eyes that seemed to scorch her very soul. She closed her eyes, trying to gain some control, but she could not ignore the hands on her rump. They were insistent, pressing his hardening groin into her belly. He squeezed harder, her body lighting up with desire. She just couldn't take it any more, all control breaking down and she let go.

 

“I want you.” She breathed in surrender.

 

Suddenly his lips were on hers, his tongue in her mouth. God yes, this was what she had wanted, this contact, this desire. She melted, becoming pliant in his arms, his hands caressing her body roughly as they kissed hungrily. He sucked on her bottom lip for a moment before moving to her throat, his kissing rough as cool velvet hands roamed under her t-shirt, kneading her breasts. Oh hell this was going a lot further than just a kiss but she found that she no longer cared, it felt too good, and as a rush of adrenaline shot through her bloodstream she gave up worrying about it and allowed herself to be swept away in the moment.

 

They were both lost in the desire for more, knowing that where this was leading was inevitable, but neither made a move to stop it. It was what they both wanted in their hearts. He led her backwards before lifting her onto the table, pulling off her t-shirt, kissing the bare flesh of her shoulders hungrily. Oh he'd been without this pleasure for so long that he just could not get enough. He started to lay her down, but she pushed him back.

 

“No, not here…” She gasped. “The bedroom. That way.”

 

With a growl he picked her up and rushed into the darkness of her room. He practically he threw her onto the bed, before climbing on top of her, kissing her hard. She remained pliant as he began to undress them both. She sighed with contentment as they lay naked together, his cool velvet skin, soft and soothing against her burning heat. She moaned as he began to savage her, kissing sucking, stroking, kneading and teasing her. It was exactly what she wanted. His hands roamed over freely as she buried his fingers in his hair as he slowly started to map out her body with his mouth, moving ever downward, searching for the sensitive spots that would make her cry out and beg for more. He wanted her utterly out of control with need and desire and was going to drive her to the edge before he took her.

 

He took his time Tegan giving him free reign; it had been so long since anyone had touched her in this way, actually she had never been touched in this hungry yet reverent manner. Never before had someone been so utterly determined to pleasure her. She didn't think she had ever felt this aroused. She wasn't a virgin, she and Michael had lain together several times but it had never been like this. She was moaning freely, Torin delighting in every sound she made. True this was pretty one way at the moment but he swore if she touched him he was going to explode. After being without so long he was so hard it hurt. It was taking every ounce of control her had to get her suitably ready for him. Her breath came in gasps as he kissed her stomach; it had never felt this good before. She couldn't get enough, her body aching for him, her hands grabbing, insistent as she opened herself to him.

 

She practically screamed as they were joined, Torin almost losing control of himself. Being buried in her tight wet heat was incredible. He had forgotten it could feel like this, he had not lain with a woman for 400 years after all. They stopped, lying joined, and completely still, waiting for the need to ebb a little, kissing each other softly. Neither of them wanted this to end too soon, and now that they had begun they were going to savour this. Tegan wrapped her legs around his, locking them together, gazing into his green eyes in wonder. She finally felt whole after so long alone, the feel of him inside her was incredible.

 

Without words they both knew they were ready for this. He slid a hand under her head, his fingers sliding into her hair. Then slowly, they began to move together, reaching a slow rhythm. Tegan moaned as they rocked, every stroke increasing the overwhelming sensations. Torin's moans were muffled in the pillows, his hands firm, and his lovemaking tender despite the earlier lust. She gave herself completely to him and his experience. Torin was lost in a haze of pleasure, though he had enough control to make this good for her, though he could quite happily have fucked her hard. He didn't want that, he wanted there to be a chance that this would be more than a one time thing.

 

He manipulated her body masterfully, drawing it out, taking his time with her. She shuddered as he started to suck at her throat, a tender area for her, and it gave her momentary twinge of fear, but what he was doing to her felt so incredible she managed to let go of that fear as with every thrust he brought her closer and closer to the edge. She was gasping for breath as she neared her climax, Torin moaning loudly as he could feel her start to tense around him. She never wanted it to end, but she couldn't hold it back. They cried out together, lights going off inside her head as they reached heavenly and agonising release.

 

They lay together for a while, Torin moaning softly into her hair, the sweetness of release almost too much after such a long time. She held him to her, nuzzling into his neck, his skin seeming to have lost a little of its chill. She knew it shouldn't have happened, but she couldn't bring herself to feel any regret. He had made her feel complete and after all her loneliness she was going to treasure this moment. She quivered beneath him, her body not used to such pleasures, Torin smiling at her as he brushed hair from her face. He kissed her softly, Tegan sighing into the sweetness of his embrace. It was only as she started to cool off that they were clambered under the duvet.

 

“Thank you.” He whispered, playing with a lock of her hair, as he lay beside her.

 

“I think I should be thanking you.” She said seriously. “Thank you for making me feel whole, making me feel like a woman again.”

 

He smiled; holding his arms out to her and she gratefully nestled into his chest. They lay still for a long time, eyes closed, not saying anything, just holding each other. Eventually Torin became restless.

 

“What's wrong?” She asked softly.

 

“It will be dawn soon.”

 

She suddenly felt the need for him to stay overwhelm her. After feeling like this, complete, wanted, needed, she couldn't bear the thought of him leaving her now, leaving her to her loneliness once more.

 

“Stay here.” She said softly. “No light gets in, you'll be safe.”

 

“The others will question my absence.” He said with all seriousness.

 

She sat up and looked down at him, fingers gently stroking his chest.

 

“Look, do you really care what they think?”

 

“No.”

 

“Then it's settled. You're staying.”

 

He saw it in her eyes, the desperate need to not be alone right now, and gave in. She lay down on top of him, kissing him gently. He laughed, squeezing her lightly. Yes, they had tonight, and what tomorrow would bring, well they could only wait and see. His hands gently brushed over the skin of her back, travelling downwards, making her shiver. She winced as his fingers strayed to her thighs.

 

“I'd forgotten about those.” He whispered.

 

He ran his fingers over the welts with feather light touches, making her shiver.

 

“Don't!” She gasped.

 

He laughed at her as she settled down beside him, nuzzling into him. She hadn't felt this happy in a long time. She knew what she was doing was dangerous, she knew what he was, but she couldn't bring herself to care about that right now. He provided her with a desperately needed solace and he was the only one who could understand her life, her troubles. She could never have a relationship with a human lest he be used against her, something that Demetriov would probably delight in doing. So he was her only option though she hated to admit it. So for tonight at least she pushed it from her mind, feely somewhat sleepy after their exertions.

 

Torin sighed contentedly. There was likely to be hell to pay when Demetriov found out about this. He knew that he wanted her for himself. But changing Tegan to get to her was not how it should be done. Hell this was not how it should have been and he certainly didn't come here to seduce her. They had gotten lost in their emotions in the moment. But right now he couldn't care less about all of that. For tonight she was his. That was the thought that stayed with him until he fell asleep with her in his arms.

 

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Author's notes:

And so it begins. Yep she is foolish beyond description, but there you go, and my first citrus in quite some time. Nothing too graphic but it wasn't about the physical act so much as their feelings. I actually really enjoyed this chapter especially in the final edit where a lot of Tegan's inner monologue really got going. Thanks to Paniwi and our ongoing RP saga for that. And yes, she keeps a sword under the sofa, you don't want to know what she keeps under the bed…