Original Stories Fan Fiction ❯ Stones of Summer: Instinct ❯ Late-Fall/18 ( Chapter 11 )

Chapter Twelve
Late-Fall/19

“Human pain does not let go of its grip at one point in time. Rather, it works its way out of our consciousness over time. There is a season of sadness. A season of anger. A season of tranquility. A season of hope.”
Robert Veninga

The truck thudded over the terrain, jostling us back and forth. I stared out the back dully, not really excited to be going to the market. There wasn't much to do, especially with Jun-Lee gone to her brother's. The truck slide to a halt, jarring us all. The market was its normal hustle and bustle. Every body was packed six deep and I shuddered at the thought of trying to move through that. I moved myself to sit on the edge of the back.
“Jannie, why don't you stay and watch the truck?” Mom patted my knee as she passed me.
“Sure mom.” Each of our group took the lists proffered to them and headed off.
“You okay?” Startled I looked up. I couldn't help the silly grin that maneuvered its way on to my face. I nodded and shooed him.
“Go do your shopping old man.” He grunted, and tried to pull my hair, but I was too fast. I laughed as he sulked away. I closed my eyes and thought of Way and how I had said the same thing to him. I wondered what he would say of me now if he could see me. I hoped he wasn't disappointed.

It had been nearly twp hours of sitting there, waiting for each member to arrive back. I helped load everything they brought, and I stole from a bag of dried ginger dad had hidden in his pocket and could only grin when he caught me. I meandered around the truck, trying to waste the time.
“Jancy, could you do me a favor?” I followed mom;s voice to the bed of the truck where she and dad were checking of copies of the lists to make sure everything was there.
“I forgot the sugar. Could you go and get it?” I sighed lightly in annoyance, but nodded and took off running into the crowd. I darted around bodies, looking for any opening I could.
I nearly missed the little blanket put out as the shop for the sugar.
I asked for 9,072 grams and paid the man. I whirled around, feeling my burden weigh me down. My elbow jammed into some one and I twisted to look at who I hit.
“I'm sorry!” It didn't even occur to me that more than half of these people didn't understand English. My eyes widened to the point I thought my eyeballs would pop out. My jaw dropped. The woman smiled, moving her child to her other hip. He wriggled around until she let him down and he ran off.
“Hello child though you are now more woman than child.” I took a step back as she moved in to hold me. I shook my head, not quite able to blink just yet. I held my breath.
'This is not real. This isn't happening...' My lungs burned for air.
“Jancy?!” I whipped around to see Chris advancing on us. I panicked, looking around for a place to hide. This couldn't be real, this couldn't be happening. Nao-shin smiled gently, and it greatly disfigured her face. One entire side of it was bright pink scar tissue. It almost looked as if it was from a burn. Her eyebrow was gone on that side and her lips mangled. I shivered and looked away, unable to see it.
“Woman, you have grown. You will still be the girl who runs with the tigers to us, but you must now recreate yourself. Who are you? Who will you be? Your journey is not over yet.” I covered my ears and looked away.
Chris reached me faster than I had thought. He set his bags down at our feet and held my head in his hands.
“Are you okay?!” He was out of breath and red in the face. I couldn't say anything. I turned back to Nao-shin, only to find her gone.
“Come on, let's go home.” Chris gripped his bags in one arm with the other wrapped around me, he guided me through the throng of people.
I still couldn't say anything even as we drove back home, shell shocked maybe. Absently, I rubbed at the Chinese characters printed on the back of my neck. Whenever I was thinking, I had a habit of rubbing them.
Chris sat close to my side, glowering at mom who sat across from us. He couldn't glare at dad as he was driving.
“I told you it was too soon.” He spoke coldly. I didn't care. I was to busy trying to fit my rational brain back together. Mom leaned over and took a hold of my hands.
“Jancy, honey, did something happen?” Softly, I pulled my hands back and tapped my fingers together. I opened my mouth but words refused to come out. I closed it. I stared at the walls of the truck as if they knew what I wanted to say.
“Jan-” I looked out at the road as if sped under us, leaving the tire thread in it.
“I'm not sure...I don't think so...I knew that woman...” They knew what that meant, just like the knew how I some times disappeared into my own thoughts. They kept quiet the rest of the ride.

Night had fallen hours ago, yet we had just arrived home. Everything had to be unpacked or the tigers would get into it, and then we all wandered off to our own rooms. I was changing when I felt the pocket of my shorts crinkle. Confused, I reached into them and pulled out a crumpled up small grubby piece of rice paper. On it was a small note in nearly eligible handwriting.
It is okay. I am part of your past, let him be part of your future. You have survived, keep living.
I sat on my bed and cried silently as the lights went off in the house. I stayed that way for hours before finally falling asleep.