Original Stories Fan Fiction ❯ The Gifted Moon Academy ❯ Rinsi ( Chapter 35 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Tahtsu looked up at the school that dwarfed his tiny figure. His hair had changed, his features had changed, he looked like a completely new person. Tahtsu definitely looked a few years older than he had a few weeks ago when he left the school to see his family. He did not carry his sword with him, a new habit he had gotten into. Or rather, a habit he had broken.
Being with his family had taken him down a notch, he was much more humble than he had been before, and thankful for what he had. At last, his family had forgiven him out of the kindness of their hearts and let him back into the family. Now all he had to do, was forgive himself.
With a heavy sigh, he entered the school again, and headed towards his dorm room. Leaving the door open, he sat quietly on his bed, opened a book, and began reading silently to himself.
Rinsi woke from a long, but excruciating nap. It wasn't the slow, peaceful awakening most people saw in the movies. No, hers was more of a start, and almost a scream. The nightmare she had lived through earlier had awakened memories she had repressed on purpose, for the sake of her own sanity, and those memories played themselves over in her sleep. She woke up terrified, depressed, and lonely - feelings she didn't want to feel again. She missed Tahtsu badly, but at the same time she was afraid - no, more like terrified - that he would hurt her, just like everyone else in her past had done. She curled back up into a fetal position, not wanting to move as tears streamed down her face.
Finishing up the chapter of the book he wished to read, he quickly headed towards the music room. His family had hardly enough money to survive, but he was fortunate enough to know how to play an instrument. He had missed the piano so much from when he was gone.
"Mm.." he sighed softly as he entered the room. The familiar scent drafted up into his nose. A bit startled, he saw the violin shattered against the wall.
"..Huh," he said in astonishment before he began playing the piano. It wasn't a soft, calming song. It was hard and edgey, and had a fast beat. He played loudly, the song carrying throughout the halls.
Rinsi could hear the tune of a piano playing. She hadn't heard such music since Tahtsu had gone, since they were the only two who really used it. The music was fast and crazy, and normally would make her want to dance, but right now she was too depressed and frightened to even think about it. However, the thought that Tahtsu might be back crossed her mind, and she wanted so badly to see him! She stood and peered out of her dorm room door, checking to make sure no one was around. She felt like she was taking a huge risk, even though she knew she wasn't. Her mind still wasn't right yet.
Rinsi crept down the hallway, her staff in hand, wary of each and every noise around her, no matter how loud or quiet it was. As she approached the music room, the music sounded louder to her, and though she was afraid of being seen by whoever was in there, she had to make sure it was Tahtsu, even though she wasn't sure herself what she would do if it was him. Part of her wanted to hug him, the other part wanted to run.
Tahtsu turned around, hearing someone's footsteps above all the noise. A smile shot across his face as he saw Rinsi. He flew up and ran over to her, engulfing her in a big, warm hug.
"I'm sorry I left so suddenly, m'dear," he whispered into her ear. He moved the hair in her face away so he could kiss her cheek softly.
"What is wrong?" he asked, knowing well that something was off about her.
His movement was so quick that it took her by surprise. Rinsi shrank back the best she could, absolutely terrified that he might try to hurt her.
"S-stay back!" she screamed in terror, "D-don't hurt me!"

"Mistress Rinsi is awake now." Cecil said through his/her tears, "Cecil needs to fix her, too. If Auntie Nakya ever tries that again, Cecil will never forgive her!"
Cecil flew out of the room promptly. Since s/he was connected telepathically with Rinsi, s/he saw and heard everything she did. Daddy Tahtsu was back! But Mistress Rinsi was so scared, even though she didn't need to be. S/he flew as fast as s/he could down the halls, to the music room, and made a beeline for Rinsi.
"Mistress Rinsi!" Cecil said both excited and still sad. "Master Tahtsu! Please bear with Mistress Rinsi. A bad man came and did something bad to her mind. He showed her things she had forced herself to forget so she wouldn't do what she's doing now."
Tahtsu took a step back as she yelled at him to get away from her. A twinge of pain shot across his face, his eyes quickly filling with tears.
"W-what.." he whispered softly as he took a few more steps back.
Regaining his composure as Cecil flew into the room, he sighed heavily and bit his tongue so he wouldn't show his depression.
"...I see." Tahtsu said simply.
What else was he supposed to say? Rinsi didn't want him around her, he couldn't help. He just stood there awkwardly, staring at Rinsi with longing eyes.
"It's ok, Master. Mistress DOES want you around. She missed you so much! She's just...sick right now. But it's ok! Cecil can fix her."
As Cecil clung to her back, he began to glow a bit, all the while speaking softly to her mind.
Mistress, it's ok. S/he said softly, distracting her as s/he packed away those painful memories that had been awakened. It's Master Tahtsu. He's home, and he missed you. He would never hurt you, and you know it.

Rinsi's eyes cleared a bit, and she looked up. Her body straightened from her defensive slouch, and she smiled brightly at Tahtsu. She ran up to him and threw her arms around him, both happy to see him and sad to see the longing, pained look in his eyes.
"I'm so glad you're home." she said softly.
Tahtsu stared straight out in front of him as Rinsi ran over to him and hugged him. His heart heavy, he reluctantly returned her hug and embraced her.
"What happened?" he said coolly.
"Someone attacked me." Rinsi said simply, enjoying his presence, "I opened my door to talk to them, and before I knew what was going on, I was living my worst nightmares. All the memories I had suppressed to save my own sanity were brought to life and used against me. One of the new teachers and his pet wolf made him stop, and Cecil is working on fixing me again. What about you? How did everything go? You look different. You seem different. But I think I like it."
"I...I see..." he said under his breath.
Tahtsu had nothing else to say, he wouldn't try to be her knight in shining armor and go after whomever had done this to her. No, that would be childish and immature. So instead, he just kept quiet and took a step back from her as she asked how it had gone.
"Fine, I do suppose." He said.
He wasn't exactly in the mood to go into details when Rinsi had just yelled at him to get away from her. He let out a heavy sigh.
Rinsi looked up at him with concerned eyes. Why was he being so distant? Had she done something wrong? Had he....had he seen her transform without her knowing it?
"What's wrong?" she asked simply. "Did I upset you? If so, is there any way I can make up for it?"
"You snapped at me," he said distantly. "Yelled at me to get away from you," his voice was melancholy.
Tahtsu's face was as hard as stone. After such a decent trip, this was what he had to come back to? Maybe he should have stayed with his family.
Rinsi looked down. Now that she thought about it, she remembered snapping. She hadn't meant to, though. She loved him dearly and didn't want to hurt him, but it had just come out. At the time she wasn't even in her right mind. Did he know that?
"I'm sorry, Tahtsu." she said with a sigh, "I didn't mean to. It just...all those images...those nightmares...it broke me inside, and I was terrified of everything and everyone. I was terrified that everyone would reject me and beat me up like people in my past had done. I was terrified that, if anyone touched me, I would relive that nightmare again. I wasn't in my right mind. I was literally frightened out of my wits. Cecil locked up the memories for now, and will work with me later on dealing with them, so I'm ok now. I'm sorry I yelled at you. I really didn't mean it. I'm really glad you're back. I missed you so much!"
"Forget about it..." he said softly. "I missed you too," he said.
For some reason, he seemed very void of emotion. Usually, he would be such an upbeat person, and he would be excited to see Rinsi. But, whatever she had said or done, triggered something in him. A guard
"Alright then." Rinsi said quietly.
In spite of his forgiving statement, he still seemed distant, even cold. She really must have screwed up to make him like that. She sighed inwardly, her heart heavy as she felt she was on the verge of tears again. She waited so long, in so much agony, to have him back and what does she do? She frightens him away in her own terrified state. Just like everyone else she ever met that knew her powers. Weren't they supposed to help people? If so, then why were they pushing people away? She couldn't understand it, and it hurt, especially seeing that her own unstable state of mind, at no fault of her own for the mental rape she experienced, had pushed the one man in the world that she truly loved away.
"L-lets walk and talk." she said, blinking back the tears that threatened to spill down. "It's been a while."




Ki'iro's eyelids flickered as a nightmare flashed through his dreams. It was simply what had happened with Nakya, but he was the one drowning. Nakya was the one drowning him, holding him down, sucking out the last of his breath as the pressure of the water surrounded him. His own shadows seemed to be outstretched, just watching him as he sank deeper and deeper into the abyss. Mockingly, they all darted up towards the surface and flew out of the frozen lake.
"No!" he screamed out loud as the water smashed against his body, crushing him.
Ki'iro woke up in a cold sweat with beads running down his face. His body was shaking violently as he curled up in his warmed blanket. The hospital-like chair was completely uncomfortable, as it was just hard plastic. He shot a gaze over towards Nakya who was still lying in the bed the same way she had fallen into her sleep. Ki'iro raised a weak finger and ordered a sliver of shadow to go brush against her cheek. Tears quickly filled his eyes and began running down his face. How much he loved her. He chewed on his lower lip as his body continued to shake.
"I'm not meant to be happy," he said, nearly inaudible.
Nakya flinched slightly in her slip as she saw her father's image in front of her, repeating his last words to her over and over again. Feeling something brush against her cheek, her eyelids fluttered open, and she looked around without moving her head, still too weak from the incident. Looking over at Ki'iro, she noticed he was crying. She frowned prettily, before motioning for him to sit beside her. Her voice was still weak and she would need him to be closer so he could hear her. She loved him so much, but he was clearly not happy with that. She would have to let him do what would make him the happiest, even if it meant leaving her.
Ki'iro looked up at her weakly, his eyes drooping from their own weight. He shook his head no as she asked him to go near her. Frankly, he would have loved to be around her, he would give near anything to have her close to him again, but it wasn't worth it for her. She needed someone who could provide her with constant happiness, and that, he could not.
Sighing softly when she saw Ki'iro shake his head, she realized she was going to have to go into his mind, straining herself even more. Closing her eyes she connected her thoughts to his.
'Look. I understand you don't want to be with me anymore. Even near me. You're obviously not happy. I'm exhausted and almost died and I can see that. So... If you want to go, you can. I just want you to be happy, even if that means it's not with me. It just proves my father was right...'
Her thoughts broke near the end, and she looked away from him so he wouldn't see the tear roll down her face. She kept her thoughts connected with his, in case he didn't want to speak to her out loud. She shivered violently, even under the blanket.
Ki'iro silently let his thoughts wander, not knowing Nakya was still connected directly to his thoughts. His heart was clouded with darkness, secured behind iron bars he wouldn't let anyone through again. Ki'iro was never meant to love, and he knew it. Nakya needed someone who could be happy, Ki'iro had changed, he wasn't exactly a happy person anymore. His life had changed for the worst, and he didn't want to drag Nakya down with him, although his heart would forever long for her. He looked away from her, and stared at the wall opposite of him, a faraway look in his eyes.
Biting her lip hard enough to make it bleed, Nakya closed her eyes as more tears fell.
'So..it is my fault then? Because you don't think you're good enough for me, still?'
Her father had been right. She tried so hard to prevent those words from coming true, but it seemed that she had failed at that as well. Her thoughts wandered but she didn't care if she was still connected to his. He still loved her but..he couldn't; no, he wouldn't be with her. So did that mean he wasn't happy with her? Or just that he wasn't happy at all? She kept her eyes closed and pressed her tongue against the wound on the inside of her lip. She knew Ki'iro better than to press the subject. She didn't want to upset him anymore. She felt her heart breaking, but it was what he wanted. Hopefully he would be happier this way..
He shot a thought at her as her mind wandered.
"Don't you dare think this will make me happy. It's not good for you to be around somebody who is never happy with his life, no matter how much good is going on around him. I do this for you, it would be selfish for me to be with you. I want you to be happy, and I can assure you in the long run that you will not be happy with me. You would become frustrated with my constant depression, and would no longer be happy," he left his mind open to her, not something he would normally do.
Listening to his thoughts, Nakya pulled the blanket higher around her face. Attempting to steady her thoughts, and failing miserably, she sent one back to him.
'It's alright.. I understand. I just want you to be somewhat happy. You're not happy being with me, as you've said when you mentioned not being happy ever. Maybe if I don't fight this, it will make you happy, even if it's for a little while..'
Her thoughts were wracked with pain, but she was much too weak to hide it. She hid her face in the blanket, mentally scolding herself for being so weak. She would go along with it, because it was what he wanted. She knew in the long run, he would be wrong, but she would let him think otherwise for now. She didn't want him to see her crying, she knew he didn't like it. He was already getting upset and she hadn't wanted to do that. Taking a deep breath in, she let it out in a long, shaky breath, trying to steady her emotions.
"I just...You used to make me happy...I don't know..." his thought trailed off, followed by a mental barrier covering his mind.
"I love you," he said through gritted teeth. "But you need something more," he sighed heavily and slithered back under his blanket.
Nakya heard his thoughts then they abruptly stopped. He had forced her out with a barrier. She had heard enough though. She wasn't good enough anymore. She didn't make him happy anymore. A wave of nausea washed over her and she kept her mouth tightly shut until it passed. Returning once more to her emotionless state, she answered him out loud, her voice soft.
"It's alright. You don't have to explain anything to me. You shouldn't love me. Don't love me. You should just go. There'll be someone out there who will be able to make you happy. I can't anymore. Just, whatever you do, don't tell me you love me again. It's hurt too much to hear it."
Amazingly enough, she was able to keep her voice steady. It didn't tremble once. She was glad her face was hidden though, he wouldn't be able to see the pain written on it.