Other Fan Fiction ❯ Stupid In Love ❯ Aveline and Varric finally share notes ( Chapter 8 )

I do not own Dragon Age or its characters.

I do not make any money off the stories I've written for it.

Unless you count the fact that I can't sleep or work when a story takes hold, so writing it allows me to get back to being productive. But I don't think that Bioware can sue me for that.

Stupid In Love

Chapter 8

“You know, usually, it's Donnic who joins me for a pint. What brings you by, Aveline?”

The Captain sighed. “I just couldn't stand listening to her anymore. Not without saying something I'd regret.”

Laughing, Varric replied, “Hawke pissing you off? Is it Tuesday again?”

Taking a long draught from her ale, Aveline replied, “Actually, I'm more worried about her than pissed off. At this point, I'm about ready to go smack Fenris upside the head with a mace. Especially if I have to hear her defend him AGAIN! I mean, there is a limit, Varric, there has to be, to how much one is willing to overlook.”

“Wait. I thought you liked Fenris.”

“I do. But after what he did to her three years ago, it just breaks my heart every time she talks about him.”

“Three years ago? You mean the night that…” He stopped quickly and his expression became guarded.

Aveline's eyes narrowed and she turned her full attention on him. “You knew what happened between them? And you didn't say anything?!”

With a sigh, he replied, “It wasn't my place. I mean sure, he only made me swear not to tell Hawke, not you, but I wasn't about to betray his confidence - it's not like he has that many people he actually trusts.” He chugged back the rest of his pint and waved for a new one.

“And their `intimate' encounter apparently was a deeply profound experience for our former slave and virgin. I found him in here, more drunk than I think I've ever seen anyone. And more miserable than I'd ever seen even him.”

Clenching her jaw, Aveline replied, “It's better than he deserves.”

Varric's brows drew together in confusion. “What do you mean? He didn't do anything that terrible!”

Slamming her mug down, Aveline said, “He LEFT her! Slept with her and then left!”

“A lot of guys do that, Aveline. It's not a murdering offense. When I found him, he was so deep inside a barrel, I was afraid he wouldn't be able to crawl his way out. You know, Fenris told me he was actually hoping that someone would jump him on the way home - said he wanted to kill something deserving, but I think he was actually hoping someone would put him out of his misery.”

Now it was Aveline's turn to look confused. “That doesn't make any sense. She was the one who got drunk that night - and stayed that way for three nights afterwards! Don't you remember her coming in her to play cards with you and Donnic? We had to carry her home.”

Varric gave her a look of scorn. “I remember everything. She played with us, had a good time. That was the following night, and Fenris was still in bed that day with a hangover.”

“That means he'd STOPPED drinking. She was just getting started. Just because she was here doesn't mean she wasn't hurting. I found her in her house two days later and she'd never stopped. If Bodahn hadn't been there watching over her, she probably would have killed herself falling down the stairs, she was so drunk. You think what he did meant nothing to her? He broke her heart. So don't you start defending him, too. He used her.”

His eyes scrunched in thought. “I don't think it's that simple. And I don't think he was using her. I'm pretty sure leaving was the hardest thing he'd ever done - harder than escaping Denarius even.”

Jaw tight, Aveline gritted out, “I find that hard to believe.”

He sighed deeply. “Think about it. He's an escaped slave. He's never known anyone like Hawke before, never had a real friend. Certainly not one who'd be willing to share a night with him. When he realizes his feelings, he doesn't know what to make of it. I mean, she couldn't possibly be in it for more than kicks. But he - he wants to hold her, keep her, starts feeling jealous, looks at her beautiful face and suddenly realizes that if he could, he'd steal all her time, keep her just to himself. He wants her all to himself. In his mind, how different is that from keeping a slave? He hasn't had a chance to understand love at all - it's completely foreign to him. And even if this wasn't just a night of attraction for him anymore, his master could come to take him back and she could get hurt. He realizes in that moment that he loves her, and how selfish love is, and thinks that she deserves better. So he comes here, pours himself into a bottle, wishes he were dead a little bit, but resolves to stay as near her as possible so he can do whatever he can to see her happy. He was willing to leave the woman he loved to protect her. How can you blame him for that? It's not like she was in love with him or anything.”

`Not like she was in love…' Aveline's expression grew guarded. “Varric, how much of what you're telling me did you actually hear from Fenris and how much is you embellishing?”

He looked mildly offended. “Please. If I was going to embellish, I'd have told the tale immediately so I could let it grow over time. Can you imagine how this tale would have grown with three years to let it properly ferment and age?”

Aveline shut her eyes and shook her head. Then pressed both hands over her face. “Oh, Maker. Varric, do you know why I came in here to drink? Because she just finished telling me how she's not surprised that he asked for those markings - that he fought for them. Because she's sure that the reason he did so was simply to get the boon to buy his mother and sister's freedom. She said, `He may not be able to remember now, but I know it. Fenris fought and made sure he'd be a more valuable slave so he could purchase freedom for his family at the cost of ensuring he'd never be free himself. It is exactly something he would do.' And all I could think was, `Why are you still defending him like that? After he left you sobbing and drunk for three whole days?! You were a complete wreck, like I'd never seen you before. Not when you lost your brother, your sister, not when your mother died. How can you STILL love him so much when he's done nothing but hurt you?'”

“Wait. Hawke LOVES Fenris?”

“She's been in love with him since practically the first time they met! It would be adorably cute if it wasn't so horribly sad. But she thinks there's no way he could possibly feel the same. And when he left her three years ago, she became even more sure - and more determined that she'd stay by his side to support him, even if it meant she'd always be miserable and alone.”

Varric looked stunned. Then angry. “What the hell is wrong with these two? Do they both have to be martyrs to love?”

“And now you see why I'm here.”

Varric shook his head again, as if he were trying to clear his thoughts. “I thought people in love were supposed to be stupid happy - not just stupid.”

Aveline took a deep draw from her mug. “So what do you think these two are going to do now - now that Fenris is finally free?”

Raising one brow, the dwarf commented, “If they keep true to form, he'll probably hole up in his dilapidated mansion and brood. And she'll probably kill some bad guys while saving the day for someone else.”

Groaning, the Guard Captain shook her head.

“Oh, this is bloody ridiculous!” The exasperated exclamation made both Aveline and Varric jump.

“Sebastian!” Aveline exclaimed.

“If no one is going to do anything, then I will.”

He stormed out of the Hanged Man. Aveline and Varric exchanged a look. “How much do you think he heard?” Varric asked.

“Enough, Varric. He heard enough.”