Ouran High School Host Club Fan Fiction ❯ Sleeping In ❯ Sleeping In - Chapter Thirteen - Behind the Rose Hedge ( Chapter 13 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran High School Host Club. The original manga story, characters and plot belong to Bisco Hatori, Lala, English editions to Viz Media and the anime to Bones, et.al.


Ouran in the early morning was a sight to behold, as the morning sun cast its rays onto the vast, stone buildings, the many-hued morning sky reflected from the swathes of glass windows that covered the façade. The high clock tower rose in all its glory against the vibrant sky like a giant sentinel, awaiting the moment its hands would signal the chiming of bells and the start of a new day.

The grounds and buildings were silent. Very few students of Ouran came to school so early. They had no trains to catch, no early morning rush hour to beat. Only a handful of the maintenance staff could be seen bustling about.

She headed towards the large expanse of greenery that was the maze. She had been lost there once with Tamaki-sempai, and from then on avoided the place entirely.

Until a few months ago, when she found herself lost within again.

Remarkably, it was a not Host Club activity that led her to that predicament, but her own carelessness. She had dropped by Kasanoda-kun’s small garden and was pleasantly surprised to see him there with a few girls – all bearing a mixed expression of anxiety and excitement – new recruits of his gardening club. Time passed quickly and she found herself running late for her duties in the Host Club. Kasanoda-kun tried to be helpful and gave her instructions for a shorter route back into the buildings, but it was one that would cut through the maze.

On hindsight, she should have known it was a bad idea, Kasanoda-kun’s detailed instructions notwithstanding. But foolishly she tempted fate and sprinted toward the direction of the maze. Within minutes she realized her mistake and after half an hour of aimless backtracking, she realized she was utterly lost.

She took turn after turn, even once wondering if she could just cut across the hedge. She realized, of course, that they had more thorns than roses.
Her luck only afforded her the discovery of a clearing, not unlike the one with the gazebo where she and Tamaki-sempai once found themselves in. It was the size of a large room with the high walls of the hedge serving as its walls. A patch of expertly trimmed grass lined with decorative marble stones matched a stone bench and table at the center. On a corner rose a small, decorative willow tree, its dense leaves providing some shade from the sun. It was all more decorative than comfortable, but with a sigh of resignation she sat on the bench.

She knew she needed to ask for help. She could no longer figure out how to get back to Kasanoda-kun. The only people left were the members of the Host Club. She had her phone with her, yet she hesitated.  They were sure to make a big deal out of it, and tired as she was, she still had some of her pride left. She was also far too tired to have to deal with their antics.

She sagged even further on the bench, suddenly feeling the exhaustion that she had ignored the whole day. She had been running around since morning, doing things for school and the Club. It was always like this whenever the Club planned for an event – the Host Club was worth three regular clubs in terms of extravagance, and worth ten in terms of workload.

It was all too easy to simply lay down her head on the table and sleep.

Too easy.

One moment she was sitting on the bench, resting her head over hands folded and propped on the table.

The next moment, she was flying through sunny skies, rolling plains of grass and gigantic roses.

It was, as most of her dreams were, absurd and incoherent. She was flying high above the sky and looking down at the fields of roses. It seemed for a long while that she was cruising through the air. She felt herself drifting further away. The wind was much stronger amongst the clouds and she could hear it all around her, whistling, howling, whispering, shrieking, singing, calling. She let herself drift away some more, trying to ignore the wind.

Until she realized that the wind was calling her name.

She woke up with a start.

When she looked up, her blurry gaze met a pair of dark eyes framed by black-rimmed glasses.

She bit back a gasp. For a moment she thought she was still dreaming. She blinked a few times to clear her eyes.

Kyouya-sempai.

“What are you doing here?” He asked almost nonchalantly, but there was no denying the reproving tenor in his voice.

“Sleeping.” She muttered irritably, it felt like half her body was still asleep. “I was lost.” She added, lest he think she was shirking from her duties.

“I know.” He countered evenly. “I checked with Kasanoda-kun when you didn’t show up in the Music Room. You mentioned you were dropping by the gardening club. He said you had left and went through the maze to return to the buildings.”

“He told me he knew a short cut.” She muttered. She hauled herself upright then, rubbing her bleary eyes clear.

Kyouya was sitting on the other end of the bench, his laptop on the stone table, pen in hand and his ever-present notebook lay open on his lap. It seemed like he had been sitting there for quite some time. It was then that she realized that unlike her dream, the clear blue skies of afternoon was fading, and the skies were now took the red-orange hue of nearing dusk.

“How long was I asleep?”

“Around two hours.”

“What?! Why didn’t you wake me?”

“You didn’t look like you were ready to be woken.”

She wanted to roll her eyes at his words, despite the implied thoughtfulness in his actions. It was typical of him to always temper his acts of kindness with subtle but biting criticism.

“You waited here all this time?”

“I volunteered to look for you. The rest had designations.”

She didn’t delude herself into thinking he did so purely out of caring. No doubt he volunteered because he knew he would be the most efficient in finding her, sparing the other members the trouble, and him the worry over lost designations.

“Arigatou.” She intoned, grudgingly, but gratefuly.

He merely nodded to her in reply.

“We should head back.” He said as he stood up, swiftly and efficiently gathering his things.

“Hai.”

“Don’t worry, I know the way back.”

“Hai.” She replied in mock deference, her eyes catching the smirk on his face.

They walked silently through the maze, with her following half a step behind him, wanting to keep up, but also wanting to familiarize herself with the route.

“There’s a trick to it, you know.” He spoke suddenly.

“The maze?”

“The maze is not that difficult to figure out. There is a trick to finding the fastest and easiest route out.”

“What is it, then?”

“The clock tower.”

“Eh?” She followed his gaze to the where the Ouran clock tower loomed above the hedges.

“The turns in the maze were mapped so the way out leads to the clock tower. As long as you keep it in front of you, you will find the way out.”

“How did you know this?”

“I’ve been lost here many times myself, when I was younger.”

“Eh? You mean, in your first year?” She asked, not a little bewildered at the thought of Kyouya being lost anywhere.

“No, earlier than that. I’ve been a student here since kindergarten.”

His candor surprised her a little, and an image of a young Kyouya came into her mind.

She wondered what he was like as a child, wondered if he had always been so calm and so serious. She knew a little about his family now, after the events during the festival. She knew a bit of the kind of life they had – witnessed for herself the rigid and formal relationship he had with his father, who seemed to her like a man straight out of fiction, powerful and larger than life.

Just like Kyouya-sempai himself.

“I was a normal child, if that is what you’re wondering about.”

“I was not wondering about anything!”

“My older brothers were already in high school and middle school when I started elementary here. For a time I wanted to see them at school, see what they were like.” He explained.

He paused a while as they took another turn. “I heard from my sister, that this maze was a shortcut to many places in Ouran. I decided to find out for myself if that were true, which was a mistake.”

“So you got lost?”

“Several times.”

“How did you get out?”

“I would get lucky and encounter other people, students, gardeners. It was not too difficult to ask for help when you are a young, helpless child.”

Inwardly she sighed, her image of a young, innocent version of him slightly altering. Even as a child, she doubted Kyouya Ootori was ever helpless.

“Why did you keep coming back?”

“I began to see the maze as a challenge.” He answered after a pause. She sensed a slight hesitation from him, as if he had caught himself saying too much.

Then she saw him touch the bridge his glasses, the glint of the afternoon sun shielding his eyes from view.

“I hated the feeling of being trapped and I was determined to figure it out, to learn the maze and beat it.”

“That does sound like you” She smiled at him. He merely shrugged slightly.

Despite his seemingly uncaring reaction, she wondered why he told her such a story. He was never one to tell stories about himself. But now, in the silence of the maze, he had just shared with her a piece of his childhood.

“We’re nearing the exit.”

She was too lost in thought to notice that they were indeed nearing the edge of the maze. She could already make out the high archways of the main entrance and she knew that even further ahead, she would see the first steps of the walkway leading to the main courtyard, with the clock tower rising high above it.

The rest of the way was spent in silence and eventually they had managed to return to the Music Room just in time to prevent Tamaki-sempai from calling the police to report a missing person. To her chagrin, the designations had to be extended into the early evening.

That afternoon in the maze now seemed too long ago. So many things had happened between Kyouya and herself since that day. Yet the memory of that afternoon stood out so much more now in her mind.

Somehow, in that afternoon, he had not just taught her the secrets of the maze.

He had shared with her a little piece of himself.

Now, in the silence and the slight chill of the morning, under the archways of the maze’s entrance she must go in once more.

To find him.

She marched on, keeping the clock tower behind her whilst following the turns as best she could. She thought she almost missed it, but soon she found the small clearing with the marble bench and table under a tree.

He was already there.

With a bright smile and with her heart beating wildly, she greeted him.

“I found you.”


His greeting in reply, as expected, was far less dramatic. He merely nodded and greeted her good morning, his face a mask of calm.

She had sent him the message that night she overhead his argument with Tamaki, asking him as politely as she could if he would meet her that morning. For a full minute she waited with bated breath, until his reply arrived.

It was he who suggested the maze.

“Gomennasai, I shouldn’t have asked to meet so early.” She apologized fervently.

She walked towards the bench, hesitantly taking a seat beside him.

“I couldn’t sleep, anyway.”

“Me too.” She admitted.

“Are you cold?”

“No. I’m okay.” She replied hurriedly, worried the small talk would lengthen and what little courage she had gathered would desert her.

And there were things she wanted to know first.

“Why did you leave your family mansion?”  

His eyes widened slightly in obvious surprise at her question. But his voice was level as he answered her.

“My father asked me to do something and it angered me.”

He was vague as usual, and it didn’t seem like he wanted to explain further.

She took a moment, weighing her words.

“I guess all parents are like that. They ask us to do things for our own good.” She replied tactfully.

His expression had changed slightly from the quite calm, his brows were slightly furrowed.

“My father is unlike other parents. He’s a man who will do whatever it takes to get things according to his plan, be it in business or in other things, even in his own family – and he’s not above playing games and manipulating people to get what he wants.”

She was a little surprised at the vehemence in his words, the steely calm with which he spoke only served to betray how much of his anger he tried to conceal.

There was a pause, and for a moment she thought she saw regret cross his features. Then just as suddenly, his expression softened once more.

He seemed vaguely thoughtful.

“It’s not that I hated what he wanted me to do. On the contrary, I could not have wanted anything more.”

“So why were you angry?”

“I can’t have him playing his schemes, not when someone important to me is involved.”

She looked at him questioningly and suddenly felt self-conscious even as she wondered who he was referring to. She turned her face away from him slightly. She thought of his sister and his brothers. Perhaps, Tamaki-sempai? The other Host Club members?

Then a sudden thought occurred to her.

“From how you describe him, he reminds me of someone I know.”

“Who?”

“You.” She smiled at him but faltered as she saw his expression change dramatically. His face paled as he heard her words.

“So you think I’m manipulative and controlling?”

“That’s not what I mean!” Haruhi cut in immediately, alarmed by his reaction. She continued hesitantly. “I’m just saying that, maybe you have some things in common. Maybe, you’re far more like him than you realize. That part about being determined…well, you’re the most determined person I know.”

He looked away then and she sensed some of the calm returning.

“That’s an interesting thought.” He said after a while.

Mentally Haruhi berated herself for the misstep, for it seemed they had reached a stall once more. For a long moment they simply sat there and silence engulfed them. He was not looking at her at all, his eyes gazing somewhere in the distance.

She was about to gather her courage to speak again, but it was he who spoke first.

“Why are we here, Haruhi?”

The directness of his question unnerved her. But she had steeled herself for this conversation, it was she who wanted it. It was she who had things to say.

She silently took a deep breath.

“You told me that you kissed me because I wanted you to…” She started.  

She was no longer looking at him. She had spent the entire night planning what to say. The courage and determination that drove her to sleeplessness seemed to be slipping away.

But the time to back out had passed.

“You were right.” She all but whispered.

Even as she felt a great relief as she said the words, she knew without a doubt that she was red to the roots of her hair. Even if he compelled her now she knew she couldn’t look at him. She prayed for him to somehow understand what she was trying to say.

Prayed that he figure out that she was at that moment, baring her very heart to him – and every word she uttered was agony.

Yet that was only the first part, the easy part, in fact.

All throughout the long night she agonized over what to say to him, shoring up her determination to be firm, to stand her ground.

She resolved that night that though she would admit to the kiss they had shared, she had to make him understand that despite everything, despite that admission, despite whatever feelings she had for him, there was nothing more she could give him. She would be ready to clearly explain to him that their relationship could go no further than that kiss.

She felt that was the right thing to do, the practical, reasonable thing to do.

Yet all throughout that night, there was a part of her that silently screamed for her attention – the truest part of her, the part of her she had been so afraid of.

Now in the light of day, even as her admission brought her some relief, she suddenly felt like a fraud.

But she was determined to do the right thing.

And so, despite all she felt, she spoke once more and spoke firmly.

“But this doesn’t change anything. It should never happen again.”

If his expression changed, if he was surprised, shocked or angered, she didn’t know.

She could only look away, far away, at the roses that dotted the tops of the edges, at the slowly brightening indigo sky, at the white clouds in the distance – but just not his face, not his eyes, not at him.

It was another long silence before he spoke.

“Haruhi, will you look at me?”

The gentleness of his voice gave her a start.

“Will you look at me?” He asked again, almost a whisper.

Cautiously she turned to face him, and saw the steely, determined look on his face, it was the same blazing expression she had seen that fateful morning and many other times after – his dark eyes piercing through her once more.

“You can’t possibly think that I can accept that?” He asked quietly, challengingly.  

“Kyouya-sempai, please understand.” She intoned firmly, trying to stand her ground under the intensity of his gaze.

She knew he would be relentless, he would be difficult. But she could argue with him if need be. She was prepared for this.

“There is no need to make a big deal out of it. We’re not going out or anything.” She reasoned.

“We already had our first date.”

For a moment her lips were ready to deliver a well-rehearsed retort – but as the meaning of his words dawned on her, she fell silent.

The words that he said to her that one afternoon came back to her, the question which she thought was asked half in jest, half in mockery.

And the reply she thought he did not hear.

“We had a walk.” He declared now, his expression almost triumphant

“You heard that?”

“I pay attention.”

She sighed almost resignedly, her mind still reeling.

She wondered why it was so easy for him to unnerve her, to tear away at her barriers, to steal away her calm with just his words.

“Kyouya-sempai.” She spoke determinedly, the honorific heavy on her lips “This is not going to work, and you know it. We should just keep to the way things are. We can’t change it just because of one kiss.”

“Then let’s make it two.”

Before she could react, Kyouya reached one hand behind her nape and gently drew her face closer to his.

She drew in a sharp breath. His fingers brushed her cheeks lightly, the touch of his skin against hers was at once strangely exhilarating and oddly familiar.

It all came back to her, the feel of his touch, the memories of the kiss they had shared.

It was her undoing.

With their lips only a hairsbreadth apart, Kyouya paused.

“Tell me to stop, and I will.” He whispered, his breath warm against her cheeks.

She had meant to tell him no. She had meant to make him see reason.

But once again his nearness, his touch, the hand on her nape, the brush of his fingers on her cheeks, the sound of his voice and the blazing depths of his eyes were drawing her in, making her forget all else.

“Kyouya…” She sighed.

Belatedly she realized she had said his name.

And only his name.

Then he smiled at her, and she thought she had never seen such a smile on his face ever before – a smile of absolute pleasure.

“Time’s up.” He whispered as he leaned forward and finally captured her lips.

It was almost the same – that morning when he slept in, when she stumbled into his bedroom.

But unlike that time, now she knew what she didn’t want him to do.

She didn’t want him to stop.

She wanted to feel.

Feel the softness of his lips on hers.

Feel the same lips brushing against her cheeks, the same lips from where his warm breath whispered her name.

Feel his hand on her nape, steady and warm, then moving down, caressing her back in a gentle, repeating motion. His other hand was splayed widely on the side of her face, sometimes cupping her cheek, sometimes moving down her neck, at times tangling his fingers in her hair.

This kiss felt deeper, she felt like he was drawing her into him as close as humanly possible. His lips suckled hers, his tongue reaching into her – and he tasted of mint and something else, his own taste rushing into her. Her senses were on a riot, her heart pounding and her mind lost in the sensations of his lips, his tongue, his hands and his scent surrounding her.

It was too much, too intimate.

She knew she had to get away, to let go, to break the kiss.

But as before, she couldn’t.

She wouldn’t.

She kissed him back, her lips eagerly reaching for his. She tasted him as he tasted her. She heard a low groan escape his throat at the contact. Then quite suddenly his hand moved to the small of her back, pulling her even closer to him.

If he could see her he would know her face now burned. She wondered if in his nearness perhaps he felt her heart pounding so hard, it was all but bursting out of her chest.

Yet she couldn’t stop. Her hands gripped his arm, his shoulder tightly, keeping him close.

She didn’t know how long they were all but wrapped in each other.  She didn’t know how many times their lips met and met again, and the many times he whispered her name in between their kisses.

It was too long, perhaps. But when he broke away, brushing his lips against hers gently before finally moving away, she knew it was all too short.

And for a moment, all they could do was look at each other, and catch their breath.

She spoke first.

“Kyouya…sempai.” She added, uncertainly – knowing what they just did was now far beyond the realm of intimacy covered by the honorific.  

“Call me by my name, Haruhi.” It was not a request.

“Kyouya.” She acquiesced, if only for that moment. “I don’t know if I can do this –”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Are you even listening to me?”

“I’m not asking you to make any promises. This is not a debt that you have to pay, Haruhi.” He continued.

“What is this, then?” She asked, exasperation lacing her tone.

“A challenge, one that I will win.”

“So that’s what this is?” She was suddenly irritated, his words confusing her, angering her.

She moved away from him, but his hands gently but firmly held her in place.

“Haruhi, I know what you’re trying to say. I know you’re not ready.”

She raised her eyes to meet his, her expressing not a little furious.

But to her surprise there was none of the self-assured determination on his face, neither was it the amused, mocking expression she had seen countless of times before when he was teasing her.

Instead there was only a solemn earnestness – as if he were seeking, even pleading for something.

“I will wait.”

He spoke the words as if they were an oath, a vow.

He continued. “Tomorrow, next month, when you graduate, when you become a lawyer. It doesn’t matter how long.”

“Wait for what?”

“For you to realize that you belong with me.”

He smirked then, his trademark smirk.

“But I promise too, that there will not be a day that passes that I will not remind you and persuade you to admit that fact.”

She felt her anger slowly seeping away. She felt the long-silenced part of her heart clamoring wildly within her – the part of her that felt with utter certainty that he was not lying to her.

She wanted to know, to understand why he was saying such things to her, why he had done all the things he did, why he was promising her something so incredulous.

“Why?”

She saw the change in his expression then, the way his body suddenly attuned to hers, his dark eyes held hers.

Then he spoke the words, the answer to her question.

It was barely more than a whisper.

The words fell from his lips and seemingly in an instant the breeze wafted it away so that it disappeared in the rustle of roses and leaves.

But she had heard him.

She felt an irresistible urge to hear him say it again, to hear again to be sure.

His words spoke to the truest part of her, the part that now seemed to be humming in utter happiness. It was a song that longed to fly free, so that the words would flow from her lips and he would hear them – and she knew that he too, would want to hear it again and again.

But perhaps not yet.

Or perhaps, there was a part of him that already knew.

Then Kyouya was leaning close to her once more, his fingers lightly grazing her cheek. She thought she saw herself reflected in his eyes and in that moment felt that she could spend a lifetime gazing into its depths.

This time she knew what was coming.

She knew too, that in that moment, there was nowhere else she’d rather be.

With that one thought Haruhi let herself be drawn once more into the arms of Kyouya Ootori.


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Author’s Note:

I started writing this chapter more than four years ago, though it has undergone so many changes it’s almost unrecognizable from the very first version that was written.

I am aware of the many weaknesses of this story. I’m not perfectly content with how it is now and perhaps there will come a time when I can do a rewrite. But alas, I’d rather end this than let it linger unfinished forever.

Again, I sincerely apologize for the generally slow progress of the story. But I want to thank all of you who read this story. Thank you very much for all the reviews. I can say I have read each and every one of them and have been inspired by them immensely.

Thank you, thank you, thank you very much!










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