Paradise Kiss Fan Fiction ❯ Uncertainty ❯ Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Paradise Kiss, nor any of it's characters. Those all belong to Ai Yazawa, who is a GENIUS. However, this story belongs to me.

Uncertainty

Miwako was little again…walking with Hiro and Arashi on either side. The feeling she felt then was pure bliss, walking with the two people she loved the most. Then they began to run, faster and faster, and Hiro tripped and fell. Miwako turned around to go find him, but walked into a dense mist. Without knowing where she was walking, she continued forward…When the mist finally cleared, Miwako had become older Miwako. Looking around frantically, trying to find Hiro, she bumped into Arashi. She told him about Hiro, but he only laughed and grabbed her. Miwako screamed, and suddenly, she was no long human, but a doll. Arashi carried her around with him, doing with her what he pleased, and then came home and placed her on his shelf. Looking from her perch on the shelf, Miwako saw a mirror and did not see her reflection, but Hiro's, who looked pale, malnourished and ill. Miwako wanted to go make Hiro better, but before she could, the mirror fell and shattered into a thousand glittering pieces…

Miwako woke with a start. She did not like the dream she just had.

Rolling over, she found it to be 2 o'clock in the morning. She sighed.

She had been this dream, Arashi too…and Hiro. Yes, she had dreamed of Hiro once again.

Miwako's tummy hurt. She got up cautiously, being as silent as she could so as not to wake Arashi. Sometimes he got angry with her for waking him at odd hours of the morning.

`Miwako does not want to make Arashi angry…'

Making her way to the bathroom, she shut the door softly and switched on the light. She looked into the mirror. Remembering her dream, she got another stab of pain in her stomach and rummaged through the drawer to find her magic medicine. Finding it, she ate two colored stars and waited. Nothing happened.

`Why is Miwako's tummy not feeling better…??'

She slid down the wall and sat on the cool tile, clutching her stomach. Magic medicine always worked right away! What was wrong with her? Miwako began to cry silently. The pain in her stomach was too much.

`And it was all because Miwako had that horrible dream…'

This brought forth a fresh flow of tears remembering Arashi's cruel actions in the dream. How he had laughed when she asked him to help her find Hiro…How she had became his doll…

`Miwako loves Arashi very much! But she loves Hiro too…Miwako knows Miwako can't have both…but why not still see them both? Miwako wishes Arashi would become friends with Hiro again, but Arashi hates even hearing about him. So, Miwako listens to Arashi and stays away from Hiro…Because Miwako wants to make Arashi happy…'

"Miwako will do anything for Arashi if it makes him happy." She said to the empty bathroom.

Her stomach still hurt. She took another two of the star-shaped candy and waited again. Still nothing. Thinking she knew what the problem was, she thought, `Miwako doesn't want to become an adult…'

She cried more. She was so afraid, so uncertain. What would happen after Yazawa Arts? She didn't believe she was ready for all that responsibility. She wanted to stay young, and be happy and carefree. She wanted to go back to her days of cheerful bliss with Arashi and Hiro…and just be…happy…forever…

So uncertain, so afraid.

Shutting off the bathroom light, she quietly made her way back to the bed. Climbing in, she turned to face Arashi's sleeping form. He looked so peaceful and innocent now, his blonde hair spilling over the pillow he was sleeping on. Her stomach finally began to feel better.

Miwako knew she was afraid to become an adult, afraid of all the hardships that growing up may bring, but as she watched Arashi's sleeping face, she knew she would be able to face it if he was with her. For a moment, Hiro didn't matter, the future didn't matter, and all that mattered was her love for Arashi.

That, she was certain of.

Miwako grabbed Arashi around the middle and gave him a good squeeze.

"Oy, bloody `ell…what?!" Arashi mumbled, half asleep.

Miwako squeezed him tighter. "Miwako loves Arashi."

"Mmmf…" Arashi muttered, before drifting back to sleep.

Miwako smiled and snuggled closer to her lover.

Soon she fell into a content, dreamless sleep.