Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ A Question of Strength ❯ The Pain of Loss ( Chapter 2 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

A Question Of Strength

By Kawaii_Cherry_Blossom

(I was BellaWaterFlower at this time)

Type: AAMRN

Genre: Romance/Drama

Rating: PG

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Chapter 2

The Pain Of Loss

Ash and Misty had went home after a while of staying at the hospital. Dr. Adams told them that Deliah needed her rest, and they could come back in the morning. Ash had stopped crying, but his eyes were red and he looked more upset than he ever had before. Ash and Misty sat in the lounge watching TV, not saying anything, waiting for Brock. Misty couldn't think of anything to say to him that would be the right thing to say. Plus, she was afraid of upsetting him. they sat in silence for 15 minutes, when they heard a knock at the door. Mimie was at Professor Oak's, so Misty got up to answer it. It was Brock, with Pikachu, and Togepi in his arm. Pikachu bounded off in search of his trainer, and Togepi jumped chirpily into Misty's arms, giving her a hug. Brock saw that Misty looked upset.

"Hey Misty, what's wrong?" he inquired.

She sighed, and a few tears slipped down her face.

"Misty? What happened? Did you have another fight with Ash?"

Misty shook her head. "No, it isn't that… Ash's mom…"

"Oh yeah. Is she ok?"

"No, no she isn't. Mrs. Ketchum has a brain tumour, and…and it's terminal Brock."

Brock gasped. "Oh my gosh…"

Misty lowered her head. "Yeah…"

"How's Ash?" he said in a low voice.

Misty pointed towards the room he was in. "See for yourself."

Brock looked in and saw Ash sitting on one of the couches. He had his hat over his eyes and was stroking Pikachu gently. Brock frowned. He went over to him and put a hand on his shoulder. "Hey Ash. I'm sorry…"

Ash looked up at him for a brief moment. Brock could see that his eyes were puffy and red from crying, and they showed emotions of fear and sadness. Ash nodded, and went back to stroking Pikachu. Misty sat down and the three of the watched a bit more TV. But about 10 minutes later, Ash suddenly got up. Leaving Pikachu behind, he ran up to his room and slammed the door. Misty looked to Brock, who was frowning. Brock began to get up, but Misty stopped him. She stood up. "Let me go talk to him Brock." He nodded and she walked to Ash's room.

It was dark in his room as Misty opened the door. The moonlight shining through the curtains provided the only light, which was very dim. She could hear Ash crying as she walked inside. He was lying on his bed, face down, with his face in the pillow. Misty didn't know what to say. 'I can't ask him if he's ok, because I know he isn't. His mom is dying. What do I do?' she thought. She knew that he knew she was there, but he didn't say anything. Misty walked over to the bed, and tapped on his shoulder. He sniffed a few times, but turned around to face her. He sat up and put his feet on the floor, putting his head in his hands. Misty sat next to him.

"What did I do to make this happen?" he choked out, and he began sobbing again.

Misty frowned. "Ash… you didn't do anything. These things just happen sometimes. It's nobody's fault." She saw that he wasn't convinced, and needed comforting, so she put her arm around his shoulder. 'There's nothing else I can do. This is the only way I can let him know that it's gonna be ok.'

He let her pull him into a hug, and gratefully cried in her arms. Usually he'd have his mom to do this, but now everything had changed. He cried for a little, and then stopped. He pulled out of Misty's arms. "Thanks Misty."

She smiled and nodded. "No problem. Why don't you get some sleep now."

He nodded slowly. "Ok I'll try."

Misty walked out of the room and closed the door slowly. She wasn't used to seeing her friend in an emotional state. He always tried to act strong and calm. 'I guess this time it's too much for him.' She walked downstairs to the questioning eyes of Brock.

"He's ok. He just needed to cry it out."

Brock nodded. "That's understandable. This is probably the first time anything like this has happened to him. He doesn't know how to deal with it."

Pikachu scampered upstairs to Ash's room. Misty told Brock she was going to sleep, and he nodded and agreed that they should all get some rest. It was hard to sleep though. She thought of Mrs. Ketchum as a second mother. But the thing that upset her most was thinking of what this loss might do to Ash. He was already depressed, and she hadn't died yet. But she pushed it all out of her mind, and closed her eyes tight. Sleep never came though. She couldn't get the horrible thoughts that lurked in her mind out. She stayed awake all night thinking of what was going to happen when she died, and why it was Deliah that this was happening to. In the end she tried to cry herself to sleep, she finally drifted off but it 5 minutes later it was time to get up and go to the hospital.

For 2 weeks Ash went back and forth from the hospital. He got up at 5 o'clock every morning and left, and went back home at midnight. He was tired, but he ignored it. Misty and Brock went with him everytime. Ash's Pokémon were unfit and not eating properly because Ash wasn't spending time training them, but they understood that he was going through a tough time and let Misty and Brock take care of them. Ash was just in another world. He didn't cry anymore, but his friends could tell he was deeply hurt. Misty hadn't seen him smile since he found out the news, and that was a rare thing.

It was a cold, windy day as Ash sat next to his mom in hospital. Deliah looked even sicker by then, and she could hardly speak. But it was this day that she had rather serious talk with her son.

"Ash", she said weakly.

"Yeah mom? Don't talk, it takes up too much strength."

She shook her head. "No, I have to talk to you. Please, let me speak."

Ash slowly nodded. 'What could be up?' he thought. He was feeling uneasy and nervous.

"Ash, I want to talk to you about Misty."

"Misty?" he began to feel even more nervous.

"I know you care about her, it's obvious."

Ash facefaulted. "What?! I do not!"

"Ash you don't have to hide it from me. I know you like her more than a friend. I was just wondering what you were going to do about it."

Ash blushed. He stared at the floor.

"Ash sweetie, if you don't tell her you'll lose her."

"But how can I? I don't know that she feels the same way. If I tell her and she doesn't, it will totally destroy our friendship, and I don't want that."

Deliah smiled. "I don't think that will be the case. Believe me Ash, I can tell when two people are in love, and you two have a sort of connection. Think about it Ash, and when the time is right, tell her. I need to know that you'll do this. Promise me."

He smiled. "I will, when the time is right. I promise." Deep inside he wondered why his mother was so pushy about it. 'Does she feel that she's dying right now?' he questioned, but shook the thought. But it returned as he left, and his mom was extra emotional. She kissed and hugged him, and told him to be careful and change his underwear every day.

"I love you Ash. Never forget that."

"I love you too mom", he said tearily. He wanted to stay, but he was so tired he could hardly stay awake. He cried saying goodbye to her, because she was so emotional. But he left to go home, and went straight to sleep when he got home. He slept for a whole day, catching up on the 2 weeks he had missed. He had wanted to wake up, but couldn't. Slumber took over him, and he when he woke up he started to get ready to go back to the hospital. He was extra worried because of Deliah's emotional state the day before, and couldn't believe he had forgotten to go back to her. But as he was getting ready, he got a phone call.

"Ash it's the doctor", Misty said as she handed him the phone. She stood right behind him as he talked.

"Hello?" he said into the phone.

"Mr. Ketchum? Is that you?"

"Yes, this is me."

"This is Dr. Adams. I'm…I'm afraid I have some bad news."

Ash gulped and tears stung his eyes. He made a small sound into the phone to let the doctor know that he was still there.

"Ash you mom died overnight. I'm sorry, we tried to revive her but her time had come. I truly, deeply sorry."

Ash was stunned. He was expecting the phone call, he knew it was coming that day or soon after, yet he was so unprepared. He couldn't do or say anything. He stood in shock at the force of the words. His mother was gone, and he would never be able to talk to her, see her smile, have her hold him or do anything with her ever again. He was so young, so in need of her right now, but she was gone and she would never return. He couldn't cry. He was too shocked. Misty put her hand on his shoulder. She too knew that this call meant death. She took the phone from the frozen boy and told Dr. Adams they'd be at the hospital soon. With Brock's help she led Ash over to the couch. He hadn't said anything, he just stood there with his eyes staring straight ahead, as if he was a statue. Brock sat in front of him on the table.

"Now Ash. I know you have just suffered a terrible loss. I'm very sorry, and I need to let you know that whatever pain you're feeling inside, you have to get it out. If you feel like crying, cry. If you want to kick and scream and tear up the house, do it. Just don't keep your anger and emotional pain bottled up inside of you. I know how it feels to loose a mother, because I lost mine. This is the first time something like this has happened to you, and you'll have your own way of dealing with it. But whatever happens, Misty and I will be here for you."

Ash blinked at Brock, and tears came to his eyes as he thought. 'I'll never see her, ever again. There are no second chances. That's why she was so emotional when I left that day. She knew she was going to die. I knew it though, I knew she knew. Why didn't I do something about it? I don't want to cry. Not anymore. Isn't that too babyish? But Brock just said that I should get all my anger out.' A mixture of thoughts rushed through his head and he let the tears run. He laid face down on the couch and cried into the pillow. Misty put a comforting hand on his back. Pikachu, who had just woken up, came downstairs and snuggled near its trainers' head. It knew what had happened without even asking. Ash cried for about 10 minutes straight, then calmed down a bit. Misty couldn't control her pain, and she also cried. Brock just sat there. He knew how it felt; he was used to it, loosing many people in his life. He comforted his two friends, telling them that things would get better. But nothing he could say or do could ease their pain, especially Ash's. The horrible pain of loss was as hard to brush aside as a migraine. It lurks within your thoughts until it drives you crazy. Ash didn't know what to do. His only refuge was his friends, and they were the people he'd be needing the most for the next few months.

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To be continued…