Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ Bitter Return ❯ A Tale of A Ram ( Chapter 1 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

If you ever said to me before
That I would live this life
That I am living now I guess it's all so strange…
To feel the way I do inside but…
To have so much that I could feel some
Pride for in my life so why is it that
I feel like this?

How do I feel? I've been here before?
I've felt like this…
To retreat to a place, a place within me
I need this! Keep it all bottled inside!
It breaks me to torment me again!
And torture me like it used to!

I try and try to break away from all the hate
That I'm feeling for everyone of you
That's ever done me wrong…
I need to justify the reasons for the way I'm living…
I guess I can't cause I don't feel like I deserve it…

So now the waves they have subsided…
And my soul is bleeding…
I can't take away the shame I'm feeling…
Forgive me…
-Change, Staind


He hadn't been here in some time. He slowed his pace not sure how she would react to him. He had been gone and he had left after the fight that ended in the flock's alpha being wounded. Dori had tricked him, had moved in on his ewes. But…he never intended to wound him. He was here seeking out Leliah. He wondered about her and if she bore him a lamb.

A mosquito nipped at his rubbery hide, he sent a wave of current along his skin to rid himself of the pest. The flock was lounging on the hillside. He sighed, through the lights he didn't see Haris, the ram he injured last summer. Nor did he see his beloved Leliah's lights.

Dori left his friends to wait, he had no time to really explain but, showing up with a cubone would alarm the flock, the little predators were the worse enemy to any flock. For Dori he hadn't know such things when he met Bones or the first cubone ever Orin. He had been a farm lamb that had learned such things as he grew. He really had been lucky Orin had been just a baby himself and raised with sheep. Dori remembered the thunder stone he had tied about his neck, the stone he hoped would lead him to greater powers. Great enough to free his friends from the humans who took them away.

For now he wished to make amends with the ones here in this flock. He had been a flaaffy when he first came to this flock. He had seen Leliah, he had fallen so madly for her. Bones had wanted to leave right away, the cubone had to stay far from the flock and he grew annoyed by that back then. Well this time Bones would have company while Dori tended to his business among the sheep.

"Scum! What are you doing here!" Fliggin snorted running up as he recognized Dori's taillight.

"I've…I've come to mend my grievances with Haris." Dori bowed submissively to the older ram.

"Leave before I mend grievances my way." Fliggin tossed his head back and blared his lights at Dori.
"I came to see Haris…" Dori said softly trying to make himself look as small as possible, being of the island race it wasn't hard for the bearded ram to appear so.

"Haris is dead! Now leave!" Fliggin churned the ground with his hooves. Dori knew it wouldn't take much to provoke him.

"How did…" Dori knew the answer before he could finish his own question.

He backed away slowly from the stamping ram. Dori remembered back to the day. It was a crisp day in the eastern lands. The sun was out, the air hot and slightly humid that day. Dori had been living among the flock a few days. He had ben a flaaffy, he had been horny too as he spent lazy afternoons nuzzling with Leliah.

Dori had smelled her coming into heat, he had wanted her. She was a bright and charming flaaffy ewe. But, at the time that wasn't what he was thinking about her, he was rather looking towards other areas of her. The problem had been Haris, the flock alpha. The larg ram would never allow any other ram to breed his ewes. He as alpha had full right to stop Dori should he mount Leliah or any of the ewes. Dori had one choice, to trick the elder ram.

Dori remembered that day and night…he had sat teasing Leliah. Licking her neck softly, Haris hadn't been checking the flaaffy ewe like Dori had. He touched her soft skin and felt her silkly wooly shoulders, she had been his kind, an island sheep. He hadn't been around his kind since his youth on a farm. He had been born on the damn farm and escaped it when a ram had found the way out. He had spent his time growing up among normal sheep. Leliah thrilled him for that reason, she was of his own kind.

He still recalled watching the light breeze play with her wool, shifting it about, making soft waves through it. Her pink skin and the black curls of her wool. She was oddly colored to mainland sheep but, to Dori she was a perfectly wonderful island ewe. Haris had his eye on her once he saw Dori paying her such attentions. He had thought him an asshole then, he didn't now. Now that he knew he had been in the wrong for the things he had done.

He had just been getting over heartbreak from another ewe, one he had screwed things up between them. She had gotten mad with him and his ways, he was young then didn't understand things, didn't understand the order of rules in wild flocks. Sierra hadn't understood that, she may have known the way things were in flocks but, he hadn't and the alpha there drove him out. But, worse…worse was the fact that he tried to go back for Sierra and she had drove him away as well. She would have nothing to do with him for attacking one of the lead rams over being called a runt.

Dori had decided to take his chances in another flock. He had come upon Haris and his sheep and he had met his lovely Leliah. He sat rubbing her shoulders and thinking of all he had gone through along the way towards meeting her. Dori spun a tale to her while he made himself comfortable about her, pulling the smaller ewe into his lap.

Haris had come along, the large amp had smelled her and that was when things went to hell for him. He butted Dori away from her, had stamped and threatened him to stay away from her. He saw her face as Haris herded her away from him and over to his harem of ewes. Dori was desperate to mate, he wanted her so badly! Haris was in the way. The young flaaffy ram began to plot a trick to ensure he would mate Leliah. It had taken him most of the day to devise it but, it came to him.

At first it had seemed such a brilliant idea, he had observed the vileplume and bellosoms living in the little fields at the foot of the hill. He had the notion that he could get Haris mad enough and dashing and holding his breath he could lead him right through the flowers and stun the elder ram. That had been the idea but…it didn't go smoothly. It hadn't gone even partially well.

He insulted Haris, he had walked right into his harem and mounted one of his favorite ewes, another flaaffy. Haris was shocked at first trying to figure out if he was seeing things right! The runty little ram with that disgusting little beard had the balls to just try and take his ewe! He bellowed charging at Dori.

The first leg of his plan had worked. Dori dismounted running for it, Haris was pissed and Dori knew it! It was what he wanted. Haris was screaming at him about how he would teach him a lesson or two! Dori ran down the hill in the dark, it would have all gone as he planned if Haris hadn't started throwing bolts at him. Panicked Dori began to charge down the wring side.

He didn't realize till it had been far too late. He had ran straight down towards the little ravine. Dori bleated trying to stop, he fell and rolled down the slope that was what had saved him from any serious wounds. He had laid there stunned by the fall. But…but, Haris wasn't as lucky. The ram had been baffled about the sudden disappearance of the flaaffy's light. He had kept running and saw the ravine too late. He fell in with a large billow of dust.

Dori had come to finding the sight of Haris there. His leg was twisted and Dori shuddered as he saw it. He had hoped it was fine but, deep down he knew it would never be the same. He felt horrible for it, for what he had caused. He sat considering running far away and never returning. He should have! He felt so sick to his gut, he had caused this over a ewe!

Haris did wake after some time, bleating his head off. Haris hadn't been so bad Dori discovered which made the guilt worse. Haris had seen it as an accident. He had guessed Dori's mounting of the ewe as desperation. Dori felt so sickened with himself. Everything he had done was on purpose except the injury and Haris was so trusting to merely chalk it up to merely as the antics of a horny ramling. It had been because he was desperate but, he had meditated part of it.

He had gone for help feeling like vomiting at his own actions. Fliggin had always accused and rightfully Dori of doing it intentionally. Dori figured with his bad leg a predator must have picked off poor Haris in his absence. That night he had heard Haris bleat while the healers did what they could to fix his leg.

Dori had walked down the hill to the ravine, he had never meant it to go this far. He sat crying for endless minutes. It was then that Leliah had come to comfort him. He felt worse as she rubbed him, he felt so guilty for the way he was holding her and touching her but, nature had him in it's grip. He had mated Leliah there and made love so wildly with her. But, as he rested with her at his side he ad felt empty. Though he loved her it had felt disgusting to have her after knowing damn well what had happened hadn't been entirely an accident.

He had spent the next couple of days away from the flock, he had spent them tending to Leliah. He was driven by rammish desires to stay with her and mate her even if he felt guilty for the things he had done. On the last day of her heat he had been finishing with her when the guilt was too much. He released in her and laid there thinking of what he had done. He almost confessed to her. To the whole flock but, he didn't. He held her close told her of how much he had loved her. When she felt her heat faded she went up the hill to return to the flock, she had expected him to come along. He hadn't he ran never returning till this moment.

It had been a year, it had been time for Leliah to be in heat once more, he wanted to see their lamb if one had been produced. And he had wanted to confess to Haris, beg his forgiveness. Now he knew it was impossible and never to happen. He felt tears trickle on his face as he backed away from the flock.

"Where's Leliah?" He asked just hoping she was around still.

"You have nothing to do with us you are to never come near this flock again or I will kill you!" Fliggin snorted.

Dori did the only thing he could. He went back down the hillside to where his friends waited. He laid down watching he stars and wondered how many times in his life would he fuck things up. His hand went to the sentret skin pouch, the one he borrowed from Bones his cubone friend. Inside was the thunder stone swiped from a human store. A friend had gone in there and taken it and wound up fighting a Persian for it. He opened the pouch pulling out the other content of the pouch. A few pokénip leaves, he stuck two in his mouth and chewed, he let the chemicals work on him and rid him for now of the painful memories.

He just wanted to get stoned to kill the pain. He never really did the hard stuff, only when he really needed to escape his life and slip into drug induced bliss. He laid there forgetting and letting his dreams lift him away from today. He would look for Leliah by other means, he would draw her away from the flock once he had the right plan, he had much to do. Bones just watched while he smiled with his eyes closed and he mumbled something about Leliah.