Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ Crispy ❯ Chapter 1

".CRISPY."

BY

Zack Clopton/ Psycho Z/ Cool Max Zero/ or whatever alias you prefer

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It was a very normal day here in Pokemon land. You know, running around, acting stupid, throwing balls at wild animals, picking fights with complete strangers. Normal, ya' know.

Ash had been acting like he normally acts. Being the head leader in the "acting stupid" department, he was quite qualified to act stupid. So, you know, we got that part covered.

Misty was being as uptight as usual. She hadn't let go of that little Togapi creature all morning. It sat in her arms saying, "Togapi!" every five minutes or so. Damn, that thing was annoying. But Misty, being the trooper she is, just took it and ignored the thing. She was far to occupied with Ash tight little ass.

What? What the…? What the fuck?

Oh, never mind.

Brock was also being stupid. And blind. Did I mention he was blind? Look at those fucking eyes! Ain't no way in hell that guy's got any peripheral vision. That motherfucker is blind! Anyway, back to the stupid. Yeah, he was stupid. Honestly, man, if it walks on two legs and even vaguely resembles a chick, this guy pops a boner about it. What a fucking loser.

And then there was Pikachu. The little creature was all ready up and about and acting like a little shit as usual. Every five minutes it would say, "Pika" or some variation on that. The creature, which I think is a chick because it acts like such a pussy, (But taking a look at the males in this series, it probably is a dude), was just running around in a circle, occasionally causing Ash to trip and fall and break a bone or something. Isn't it cute?

Anyway, normal, huh? Yeah, that's what I said earlier

It was just about now that Ash got a wild hair up his ass and decided it was time to rest for the night. Even though it was like nine o'clock in the morning. Like I said, stupid.

"Hey, guys! Let's stop here for the night!" Ash said while throwing his hands up in the air, simply because just saying what he said wasn't retarded enough as it is.

Misty, noticing the stupid-ness of this comment, said, "But Ash, it's nine o'clock in the morning."

Ash, in a sudden bout of uncharacteristic rage, pimp slapped Misty and said, "Shut the fuck up, you stupid bitch!"

Then Brock ran into a tree. People with disabilities are funny!

Misty decided to ignore the sudden moment of bad writing in another case of bad writing and just deal with the fact that they where going to rest, here, in the middle of bum-fuck nowhere, in the middle of the fucking day.

So, the group pulled out their sleeping bags and rested. They mentioned to sleep despite the fact that it was like a hundred degrees outside and they where in wool sleeping bags. Meanwhile, Pikachu decide to kidnap Togapi and do some horrible, ungodly thing to it. Her screams could be heard miles away.

Anyway, while Misty slept, she found herself having an erotic dream about Ash, and his oh, so sexy, man-bitch ass.

Good God, what the fuck?

Anyway, yeah, Misty was having this dream, you see. Because she's a teenage girl and when girls reach a certain age, they have these things called hormones. These here hormones have the bad, tendency to want to make the human body get together with other human bodies and make little, human-baby things. Anyway, yeah, she was having herself a naughty dream and when she woke up she knew she was going to have to go run into a tree a copy of times because she was a bad girl. BAD! BAD! BAD!

Um, yeah…

Anyway, Ash also dreamed. But being the stupid fuck-tard he was, he wasn't dreaming about fucking some chick up the ass. He was dreaming about catching some pokemon thing and then fucking it up the ass. Circle of life, you know?

Meanwhile, Brock was wondering, lost. Because he was blind, you know. And blind people can't see. LAUGH AT HIS PAIN!

Anyway, it was right about now that Misty awoke from her naughty dream. She looked around, shocked.

"Oh, gee, that was strange."

Misty looked around and saw that it was later then it had been. Now, with the help of this amazing thing called "time elapse," it was like five o'clock at night. Crazy, huh?

Anyway, Misty was still aroused from her dream. She looked around one more time and saw that everyone else was still asleep. It was at that point she decided to masturbate.

Oh, God. Somebody stop me.

Misty shoved her little hands into her little shorts and began to fondle.

Fondle… Fondle… Fondle…

Being the hypersensitive little brat she was, it didn't take Misty long to reach climax. In one of those moments of passion thing, she busted and spread vaginal discharge everywhere.

What? What's wrong?

What do you mean the word "vaginal discharge" isn't sexy?

Why, by God, I'll make it sexy!

"So, Misty stuck her fingers into her Spam purse and started to flick the bean. Soon, she felt her button tighten up and felt the need to bust the turkey. Then she sprayed lemon juice all over her sleeping bag." Is that better?

Good.

Anyway, so now Misty was pretty tried. I mean, her little fingers would have to move fast to make her reach orgasm in, like, 2.5 seconds. I mean, like, lighting fast. Like, rocket fast. Like, Sonic the Hedgehog fast. Like, if her finger where a car and the police where chasing this car and if the police had one of those speed-radar thingies and if that radar gun thing was tracking this finger-car, it would be moving so fast, the strange finger-car, that is, it would cause the radar gun to explode and send little, hot, flaming particles into the eyes of the police officers, causing them to crash their cars in a very "Blues Brother" type pile-up.

So, she was just sitting there, very peaceful and all, when she looked over and noticed something. Something HORRIBLE!

She noticed that Ash was awake and watching her.

*OMG! Plot twist~! Holy shit! Where the fuck did that come from?!!!!!!!!!!111!

So, yeah, Ash had watched her pinch the walrus and spill the Kool-Aid, and to say for sure, he was pretty turned on himself. I mean, you know, what would you do if you woke up and saw prime-A-Grade jail bate getting herself off. I would pop a boner. Wouldn't you?

Anyway, Ash was as hard as Fucking Mount Rushmore, you know. And Misty was still a little clit-crazy from her wild time and both of their hormones where popping viagra and hitting the big, red button that said, "MAKE BABIES!"

So, they jumped each other's bones.

The end.

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What do you mean you want more detail then that? What do you think I am? A fucking medical degree? I don't this shit, man! What the fuck do you want from me?

….

All right I give you your damn lemon scene. Bastards.

So, Ash jumped on top of Misty, ripping off his pants in the process. So, his twenty-inch cock enter her revolving door and made a little cherry-cream pie. Then she screamed and screamed like a bitch! Soon, both where humping like bunnies and ready to take the horse to town. Soon, Misty decided to bite her own tongue and that sent her to First-Class on the Soul Train. Soon, both of the teens where halfway to happy town and ready to spend their Kleenexes. It wasn't long when Ash decided to shake up this party and he turn Misty over and messed her up the way Panda's do. Soon, both of them where ready to London Bridge on us. But wait, there's more! They went wild like that for a bit but decided that wasn't wild enough. So Ash went and pulled a fish eye and that girl. Man, it wasn't pretty. Soon, the Donkey was burnt and Ash unleashed his white stallion on the girl. She drank his Man Milk up like it was, um, milk. And then they where both spent.

Ash then looked over at Misty and said, "Oh, yeah, by the way, I have AIDS."

PUNCHLINE! HAHAHAHA! MORE CUMMING S00N!!!!!!!!!!!11!!!

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I don't know. I was high.