Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ Divided & Confused ❯ Chapter 4 ( Chapter 4 )

Misty woke up late that morning, unsure if she even wanted to get out of her bed.

After the night before, she felt horrible. Although she was comforted by the memory of Ash's concern over her, the image of Stasi in his arms made her feel terrible. They seemed so close, so into each other. The belief that if she dressed up in order to impress Ash he'd forget about Stasi was pure stupidity. They would never be anything more than friends, she had to realize that.

Let the poor boy have a bit of fun, she though, and don't spoil this for him because of your jealousy.

She walked into the living room, and to make her feel worse, there she was, sitting on the sofa. "Oh, hi, Stasi. I didn't know you were coming over today."

"Yep. Me and Ash are going on another date today." The girl seemed overly happy, but at the same time, Misty sensed that the girl was boasting a bit.

"Where is Ash?"

"I'm in the kitchen," came the garbled response, Ash with his mouth full of food. "Morning, sleepyhead."

" It's not that late, is it?"

"It's almost noon," Brock responded.

"Oh, I better get ready then. Has anyone saw my hairbrush?" Misty asked her friends.

Ash, standing in the kitchen, looked about himself and found the small item on one of the counter tops. "Is this it?" He held the object in view of Misty.

"Ah, good. How the hell did it get in here? I must've left it here last night." As she closed in on Ash and reached for the brush, he quickly raised his arm and held it out of her grasp. "Ash, give it to me." But he didn't relent, lifting his arm even higher. Even when she jumped, she could barely reach it. "Ash, stop it. I need that."

"Well, you're going to have to get it then."

Misty fumed. Then a little smile spread across her face, and she elbowed him in the stomach as hard as she could. He let out a yell and bent almost double.

"Ah, that really hurt."

Taking the opportunity she made, she grabbed the brush and began to walk away, happy that she had got one over on her friend. But before she had walked far, he seized her with both of his arms, held her arms steady and began to try to pry the brush from her hands.

"You can be so evil sometimes, you know that." He wasn't annoyed though. He actually seemed amused by what she had done. "That wasn't fair."

"I know but when have you known me to be fair."

The two, realizing the closeness between them, stopped wrestling and just stood their for a moment enjoying the intimacy. Her warmth was intoxicating to him, her skin so soft and hair silky.

She's so beautiful, just per- What the hell?!

Coming to his senses, he let go of her and backed away, unnerved by his own feelings. She, shocked at his sudden movements which had taken her away from a kind of euphoria, looked at his bewildered face.

"Okay, you win. You can have it." His face was crimson red.

"Thanks," she giggled. Before she left the kitchen to go back to the bedroom, she glanced back at Ash and give him an embarrassed smile, one which he returned, and then she walked away, silently smiling to herself.

He just stared at her as she left, his mind still spinning in confusion.

Stasi, having watched the discourse between her boyfriend and his travelling partner, looked towards Brock, and, barely concealing her suspicions, asked, in a quiet voice, "Has anything ever happened between the two of them? They seem very ... close."

"Oh, don't worry. They're just good friends," he bluffed.

"Okay." But she wasn't sure if Brock had been telling the truth. Ash often talked about Misty when she and him were together. The only thing he talked more about was his dream to be a Pokémon Master. Even if they were just good friends she had the feeling that maybe something more was developing deep within both of them.

Misty just lay on her bed, softly sobbing to herself. She didn't know why she had just burst into tears like that. Maybe it was because they had been so close only moments before. Finally they had got into a fight that wasn't filled with insults, but one that had been fun. She loved to feel his arms around her, and she thought he'd enjoyed it too. She wanted to be held in those arms again, but not in a friendly embrace, in a loving one. She wanted him to hold her, kiss her, touch her. But she knew that that would never happen. That thought had quickly changed her happiness into depression. She could usually keep close control of her feelings, but after what happened, she couldn't stop thinking about how her and Ash could never be together.

She heard the door being pushed open. She looked in its direction, and saw Brock closing the door behind him.

"You okay, Misty?"

"Yeah. Why shouldn't I be?"

"I know you're crying. Please, I'm your friend. Tell me what's wrong. I want to help you." He got nothing from Misty so tried the more direct approach. "It's Ash, isn't it?" he said in his most sympathetic voice. He took a few steps towards her and lowered the volume of his voice even more so. "You can't stand to see him with another woman because you want him for yourself."

His compassion and understanding was rewarded. She opened up immediately. "I really love him, Brock, and seeing him with her angers me. I'm glad he's happy, but it's making me miserable."

"I guess Ash knows nothing about this."

"Definitely not. I couldn't. He doesn't have any feelings for me. If I told him how I feel, he'll run a mile. I have to accept that fact. But at the same time, I really want to be with him. I want us to be more than friends."

"It's one of the most difficult situations, falling in love with a close friend. And there is really no escape."

"I know, and I really only have on option, sit back and watch him fall in love with other girls. I knew this day would come, but that doesn't stop it from hurting so much." Her sobs became louder, and Brock began to stroke her red hair softly in an attempt to calm her down.

He didn't know what to say. What could he say? He wanted to help her, but he couldn't tell her that he suspected Ash felt the same way for her as she did for him in case he had been wrong. So he just let her cry, trying to help by being there to comfort her. This was something she had to solve herself.

"So, have you kissed her yet?" Misty asked, hoping for a certain answer.

"Ahh, no."

"Oh." It was hard for her to hide back her joy.

"You seem surprised."

"Well, I am a little. You've been with the girl for what, four days now."

"Yeah, but..." he lowered his head, stared at the floor and began to awkwardly scratch his head.

"What's wrong, Ash?" He became even more embarrassed. "You can tell me. I'm your best friend. I want to help. Remember, you're new to all of this."

"Okay, but don't tell anyone this," he anxiously whispered. "Anyone at all. Not even Brock or Pikachu. I don't want anybody to know."

"I won't. You can trust me," Misty answered, a little confused and very curious.

"It's just, ahh, I'm a little nervous." His faced turned pure red.

"What about?"

"About," his voice became even quieter, "about kissing her."

She accidentally let out a small snigger.

"I know, I know. It's stupid. I shouldn't be worried about something like that, but, I am."

"Oh, that's so sweet."

He give her a look of disdain. He was a guy. He didn't take well to being called 'sweet'.

"I'm sorry, but don't worry. It's perfectly normal. All guys get nervous about that type of stuff if they have no experience of it. They just don't admit to it. That's the problem with you men. You can't express your feelings properly, which just causes more complications." She moved to sit by his side, to try and comfort him, to show him that she cared. "What exactly are you nervous about?"

"Just about, you know, will I know when the time is right? What if I screw it up, if I scare her off? How should I kiss her, and will I be any good or not?" Then he added, with a little sarcasm, "Just the normal insecurities of a fourteen-year-old male," to try and lighten the already awkward mood.

"Why don't you want anyone to know about this?"

"I'm just embarrassed by it."

"But you're telling me about this."

"I feel more comfortable around you talking about this stuff. I don't know why, but-"

"Thanks."

"For what?"

"For being so nice. It's a great compliment to be told you're the only one a friend can talk to about certain things."

"Oh. Well, it is true. Even though we still fight a lot, well not as much as we used to, I seem to feel more secure talking about personal things to you rather than anyone else. I do talk to Brock about my feelings sometimes, but I feel a little more uncomfortable." He was trying to figure the reason out for himself. Why Misty? Was it a male-female thing? Did he feel like he was less of a man talking to another guy about his feelings than he was with a girl? Or was it due to what he had begun to notice within himself over the past few days? Was it because he had begun to think of Misty more lately than of his own girlfriend, and was truly hoping to experience this step with her rather than Stasi? Maybe the nervousness was a way of putting off the inevitable kiss just in case Misty had feelings for him.

But he tried to convince himself that Misty would never develop feelings for him. For a start, they were too close as friends for anything more. Also, he felt that if she did have feelings for him, would she be so adamant to help him with his problems with another girl? He thought not. He was just getting mixed up. Maybe he didn't have feelings for Misty. It could be because of the fact that they were to leave Viridian in a a few days, and he may never see Stasi again, and if he got to serious now, he could risk breaking his own heart. By him thinking he was developing feelings for another person would mean that there would always be a barrier between Ash and Stasi. It could just be a buffer against commitment. It would explain why he only had really noticed his feelings for Misty since he met Stasi.

But, there had always been something between them. He had always had a crush on her, and sometimes felt very close to her. Maybe the presence of another person had brought his feelings to the surface. Perhaps the feelings that he had thought were for Stasi were really denied feelings for Misty. God, I'm all mixed up, he thought.

"You okay?"

"Mmm?"

"You drifted away for a minute there. You just thinking?"

"Yeah. Can you help me, then?"

"Sure. Right, let me see. For a start, there is no given time, no given way to kiss someone. Every moment is individual, different. For each relationship there is a right and a wrong time. But if you were to pick a time, it would have to be on the spur of the moment, when you feel closer to that person than ever before. When you catch each other staring into one another's eyes. And the kiss. The kiss would need to be soft and tender, but at the same time strong and passionate, to show the other person how much you care."

This time it was Misty drifting off into her own little dream world. A moonlit night with the man of her dreams. At least fantasy always worked out. "You will know when the time is right. It's a natural human instinct. You can't prepare for it. You just have to wait."

"I think I understand. But what if it's the wrong time for her, and what if I'm no good at it?"

"If you have the wrong timing, then you just have the wrong timing. It's far from a perfect science. And about quality, don't worry. You'll be fine. Just let your instincts take over. Remember when you first saw her, you just went up to her and asked her out. When you get that feeling again, that impulse, just ride with it."

"Thanks, Mist. I think you've helped me. I feel a little more at ease. You're a very understanding person, and a good friend. I hope you know how much this means to me, to be able to talk with someone like this."

"What are friends for if not this?"

She needed to change the subject, feeling that this was getting to hard for her. She had just given the guy she loved advice on how to improve his relationship with another women. But then he was a friend and she wished him all the luck in the world, although she would not be the person involved. She had given up on any possibility of something happening between them.

"So, you want to go down town and grab a bit to eat."

"That would be great. I'm starving."

"You're always starving."

"I'm still growing. I need a lot of food."

"Not THAT much," she teased.