Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ The Prince and the Pikachu ❯ The Prince and the Pikachu ( Prologue )

Now, don't flip at me. I know a lot of you might find this controversial…however, I am a girl of good character, and I hold dear Veggie very high on my list of torturous activities. ^______^ Which is exactly the reason why I would write something like this. I hope that is explanation enough for you.

As of now, you have three choices. You can:

Read this

Avoid this entirely

E-mail me and tell me how marvellously humorous I am.

~J.J

The Prince and the Pikachu.

There was a short scene of a darkened hallway. Here entered Bulma, cautious, as always, of what the author was going to do to her lover this time…

She walked down the hallway, since there was nowhere else to walk, and ended up standing in front of a darkened room.

"Guys…?" she called, nervous.

A light switched on. Gohan and Mr.Popo stood staring back at her, pupils dilated, mouths foaming slightly.

"…"

They promptly held up signs. Mr.Popo's read; We know nothing.

Gohans said; We're just doing math problems.

Bulma promptly left, trying hard to ignore the fact that Goku was splashing around in a room next to her wearing a silver mermaid tail inside a hot tub filled with sparkling jello.

Vegeta rolled over in bed, abruptly brushing up against something small and furry. His eyes shot open…Bulma was nowhere to be seen.

"Err…."

The `fuzzy thing' moved slightly. Vegeta fought the urge to scream. Either Bulma had manifested into a floating cat not unlike her fathers, or Goku had slipped mind altering drugs into his sake last night.

"Bulma…?"

Now Vegeta….don't make any sudden movements. That would be stupid, and would go against all those years of hard training…this is probably your wife playing an evil trick on you…

Yeah, but what if it IS my wife…?

…That could be a possibility. Why not take it to your advantage? If I wasn't just some cricket sitting on your shoulder, I'd probably cross my arms and smile evilly just to emphasises that idea…but, that would go against Disney regulations.

So you're saying I should….??

Go for it. You only live once.

Not when you've got sparkly little balls with stars on em just waiting to be found.

Shut up and put YOUR balls into action, you baka.

Vegeta did grin evilly, just as the imaginary cricket told him to. Then, knowing that he was naked, he moved his hips forward, receiving a squeak from….Bulma.

Then suddenly, he was hit with a case of the heebie jeebies.

Um, you're not…err, `watching' me or anything…are you?

It's what we do.

I don't feel comfortable with you watching me when I'm…

Having sex? It's nothing to be ashamed of…

You'd better leave before I do something violent.

….Okay. Have fun.

Vegeta held his breath. He waited a few moments. After a minuet or two, he sighed, and resumed his assault on Bulmas new little game…

YOU THRUST YOUR PELVIS, UH!!! THRUST YOUR PELVIS, UH!!

Vegeta didn't have time to react towards the Crickets obscene remark. All he did was make a `face' at discovering the thing was indeed not Bulma, nor any part of her body at all.

Then, a fraction of a second later, all he heard was the tiny enraged sounds of; PiiiikaaaACHUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!

Sparks flew. The Cricket screamed. Vegeta made another `face' except this one was of pure terror, confusion, anger and extreme pain.

After the `thing' left him and scurried under the bed, Vegeta lay in near paralysis, his chest heaving, his legs curled in a feeble position. Then, very slowly, he brought his hands down towards his groin, and moaned very, very, loudly.

A few moments passed while he regained some dignity, composure, and consciousness. And then, his face angled downwards in it's usual murderous stare that he usually gave when he was royally pissed, pardon the pun…he leaned over the side of the bed, moving with deliberate care.

Under the bed was a fat, small yellow mouse with a tail much like a lightning bolt and two black eyes that stared at him in fear and defiance.

Vegeta blinked.

"I just fucked a mouse?"

The mouse lunged forward a bit. "PIKA!!" apparently, the mouse wasn't feeling any better than he was. It didn't want to seem to sit on its ass…

Vegeta gave it another silencing glare, and crawled back over the burnt bed sheets, slowly, again. "I'll get you later…right now…"

If he wasn't a Sayajin, not to mention one of the very strongest, he would have most certainly been dead by now. He was okay, in particular, but….what about…IT?

He looked down, looked over to the closet, and spotted some clothes. Then, after his mind wandering off the subject that he had previously engaged in anal intercourse with an electrical rat, he started to wonder where Bulma was…

It better not be fried, cricket. Or you die.

What's that? Are you accusing me?

You knew that was a rat, baka.

I did not.

Do you enjoy watching young men do this to themselves?

Well, the look on your face was rather hilarious.

You die. Now.

I run fast.

I teleport.

Hmph. I'd hate to see what anybody would think watching you streak through the house nude screaming obscenities at an imaginary cricket, my dear prince.

There was a short silence. Vegeta thought that over.

I mean really, Vegeta. Haven't you had a bad enough morning?

There was more silence. "Well, I would have a hard time explaining that to Kakarott…or anyone else for that matter…"

Good. Then I'll leave you now, leave you and your mouse lover to sort things out. Oh right, don't get to close, he has distemper.

Vegeta's eyebrows lowered so far they would have suffocated anyone else's eyeballs by then. His mouth turned down so deeply that his fangs clearly glistened in the morning sun.

He looked mad enough to chew nails.

Oh my…

That's funny.

If, of course, you like Namikiens.

But, there were more important things to do.

He dressed, the ordeal taking him a good hour to properly get his attire on. The underwear was especially painful…

And then he marched downstairs.

"Heya Vegeta!"

Vegeta turned a disapproving glare towards Kakarott, who was over for some of Mrs.Briefs breakfast.

Damn the idiot. He just had to be here…

"Hmph." Was his usual answer. Even though he seemed especially sour this morning, nothing could wipe the idiotic vacant expression of joy from the warrior's face.

"You just gonna stand there the whole time?" he finally implored.

"Shut up Kakarott! I will get my breakfast when I please, and not before, baka!"

He was still smiling. "Just asking."

There was a silence. Vegeta scowled and turned his head slightly away from him.

My, the kitchen table seemed so suddenly far away, this morning.

Mrs.Briefs bounded into the kitchen, smiling happily as she hummed some tune and dished out a few hundred pancakes onto Gokus plate. Which, sadly, wouldn't do much to keep him occupied.

"Err, where's Bulma?"

Kakarotts wide, shinning eyes peered excitedly over his towering mass of pancakes, causing Vegeta to falter and wonder how his neck suddenly got so long…

Yes, it was Goku, the extraterrestrial.

"She's outside, working on parts, Vegeta!" she chirped back. "How many pancakes?"

Vegeta tossed a glance to Kakarotts, who's owlish eyes still stared back at him. He quickly counted…

Can't have him beating me…

"More than he's got, any ways."

The eyes vanished, followed quickly by sounds of hurried eating.

Vegeta still hadn't moved. He suddenly noticed Bulmas mother staring at him.

"Well? Cat got your tongue?"

No. Mouse got my dick.

He had to move. Now or never.

His first leg shot forward hurriedly, then his right, then the other as he awkwardly lunged towards the chair trying not to resemble a waddling duck as he plopped down.

Goku stared. Vegeta scowled, his usual response, and grabbed the fork next to his plate in a fashion much like `The Beast' in that idiotic human Disney movie did.

He groaned a bit, crossed his legs, almost screamed in pain, and decided to let them hang open under the table.

"Everything okay?" Kakarott asked suddenly.

Vegeta took a breath, tried to get his heart under control and said; "Fine, baka."

His eyes shone….again. "Just curious!"

They started eating again. It was only moments after that Vegeta felt something brush up against his ankle.

His head shot up and he looked at Kakarott, who was busy stuffing his mouth.

"What're you…?"

The touch became more intense. Vegeta reared his hand back, fork at the ready, and heaved it straight towards the offending Sayajins pancake, which hit the wall inches from his head.

"Huh?"

Vegeta scowled. "Kakarott! I have a wife!"

A look of pure stupidity crossed his rival's face. "Uh huh…" he said slowly, his brain trying to comprehend what the Prince was saying.

Vegeta went red, perhaps in rage, perhaps in something else. "SO WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING-

He was cut short when a small yellow head peered up from between his legs, looking angry.

"Pika Pi! Pikachu!!"

A short but violent explosion followed afterwards. Fortunately, Mrs.Briefs had suffered these sort of experiences of spontaneous acts of rage from Vegeta in the past, and had enough sense to fling herself out of harms way, which didn't give her much room…

"DAMMIT!" Vegeta felt himself powering up before he counted to ten, lowered his fists and closed his eyes.

Mrs.Briefs was brushing debris from her apron when she waved a frying pan angrily at the Sayajin. "VEGETA! Just LOOK what you did to my kitchen! Did Goku get more Aunt Jemmina than you, again?"

Vegeta ingored her, his eyes scanning for the mouse. "Where are you, you stupid fool!?…you can't hide forever."

Inside a cabinet, where Mrs.Breifs kept her household chemicals, Pikachu found he could easily hide forever, and keep himself entertained the whole while…

Damn, that Lysol stuff was pretty sweet.

Needless to say, nothing much happened after that horrible situation. Vegeta went on being the prince he was, rude arrogant and proud down to the last detail…all except for one small thing. He wasn't ever quite the same after that. And, as if maters weren't bad enough, he still couldn't find wherever that damn rodent had trekked off to. Oh well…there's always another fik ^_~

~Jesa Jaisai#732