Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ Titanic Rocket ❯ Titanic Rocket ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

This story is rated PG13 because there is... uh.... mentioning of naughty bits and strip poker? Nothing serious though ^_-


In some year, along time ago, in the old days, not BC, sometime in AC, between... eh, what the heck, on with the story...

An old man who had nothing to do with anyone in the story but liked to fantasize that he did told a story...

James was playing go-fish in an old smoky Rocket tavern when suddenly a ticket fell from the sky.

"Oooohh... goddie!" He shouted in glee, jumping on his motorcycle and flying out of the room, his cave-men gambling buddies shaking their hairy fists in fury for stealing all the bets.

***writing style switches***

James hurried onto the ship dock, flashing the ticket into the face of the ticket person. He stopped on the dock, looking around a bit lost. Then he saw something.

Through the corner of his eyes a brilliant fiery red shone. He turned around, gasping at her beauty. She was a goddess. Her elegant Rocket dress ruffled in a slight breeze. The breeze gently waved James's lavender hair, filling his senses with the calm salty ocean scent. He inhaled deeply, then gazed into those distant crystal blues, her eyes. They were beautiful, and he stared as if in a trance.

She failed to notice James, looking to the side, talking with a man in a black tuxedo. His hair was a bright turquoise. James looked at his own clothes, a dirty Rocket uniform. He didn't have the time to grab any of his belongings before leaving, and that was all he had.

James listened intently, and heard her name.

'So, thyne name is Jesse,' He thought to himself. He stared into the wonderful blue of her eyes, then walked to his room.

***OK, that was sickening, now for some comedy!***

James tripped over a carrot, landing in his room.

"Hey, I'm yer roomie!" A small white cat said from atop of one of the bunk beds.

"Nice to meet you, my name is James."

"My name ez Meowth!"

James shook paw and hand with the creature with the big head, getting stabbed in the palm by a claw. Nobody cared.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW-

***ten days later***
-WWWWWWWIIIIEEEEEEEE!!!!!" He screamed in pain.

By then Meowth had died of boredom. Meowth was dragged away and replaced by Mondo.

"Hi, I'm your roomie!" Said Mondo.

"Nice to meet you, my name is James."

"My name is Mondo!"

James stopped crying and wandered around the ship aimlessly, ignoring Mondo who shrugged and went back to the room. He tripped over a carrot again, which had mysteriously moved a few feet to the left. He fell on his face. Then when he looked up, he saw HER again.

She was standing on the railing on the back of the ship. James, seeing that she was about to jump, ran as fast as he could and skidded to a stop near her.

"JUMP! JUMP! JUMP!" He chanted. She glared angrily at him, then moved around to kick his face in, but slipped. She fell on top of James.

By then Butch had come along with some people nobody knew. "Jesse dear, what are you DOING to him!?"

"Uhhhn..... she isn't doing anything to me!" Protested James.

"Yeah right! Jesse, you're coming with me!" Growled Butch.

"Bye bye!" Said Jesse. "You're cute," She added so that only James could hear.

"I know I am sugar!" Said Butch.

'Oops...' Thought Jesse.

Sometime later...

"Meowth, she was beautiful! I can't stop thinking about her!" Said James.

"I'm not Meowth." Said Mondo.

"I just know that we're soul mates, I'll bet you'd agree with me, wouldn't you Meowth?"

"I'm not Meowth."

"Thanks for your advice Meowth! I'm going to teach her how to spit!" Said James, running out the door.

"I'M NOT MEOWTH!!!"

James ran onto the deck, because poor people could go anywhere they wanted but rich people were confined to certain areas. He peered into a window, but his view was blocked by something red.

'It's her!' He thought eagerly. Then it moved aside. 'Oh, it's a curtain...'

He looked past the curtain and saw something red. 'It's her!'

It really was Jesse that time. She was staring at her food. Butch was at her side, and he was staring at a girl. She had blonde hair in pigtails.

Something bumped into James's leg. He looked down. It was Meowth.

"Hi Mondo!" Said James.

"I'm not Mondo."

Someone ran by and killed Meowth, then threw him over the edge of the boat.

James was staring at Jesse long enough for her to notice. She stared back, then ran out of the room, but nobody cared. She ran over to where James was standing. "Teach me how to spit!" She yelled in his face.

"I love you too!" Said James. Then he hocked a loogie over the side. Jesse was delighted. She tried to do the same, but ended up sneezing.

Suddenly, 2 fat women and a skinny one with blond pigtails ran up to Jesse and James.

"Such a show of affection will not be tolerated! Your fiancee is wondering where you are!!!" Yelled one of the fat ones.

"Ah, let them have some fun!" Protested Cassidy, who was the blonde one.

"Methinks I smell cheese!" Said one of the fat ones. She ran off with the other one waddling behind her.

In the dining room...

"So anyways *gulp munch* I think that *chew swallow* this business proposal is *crunch* excellent!" Said Butch. Nobody was there.

On the deck...

"Let's play strip poker!" Yelled Cassidy. Everyone stared at her.

"Uhhh....." Said James, sneaking away. "I think I'll go to my room!"

"Oh no you're not!" Said Jesse, grabbing him by the shirt collar. She followed Cassidy to her room with James. Cassidy stopped in the dining room and dragged Butch out, who didn't know what was going on.

Later...

All four of them were seated around an air hockey table since they didn't fell like using a regular table. While Cassidy was shuffling the cards, Mondo suddenly walked in the doors.

"Want to join us?" Asked Jesse.

"Sure!" Said Mondo, not knowing what the word strip or what the word poker meant.

"Meowth, HELP ME!!!" Yelled James.

"I'm not Meowth."

Suddenly Meowth burst into the room. "What is it? Ooooo, can I play?"

"Sure," Said Cassidy, even though Meowth didn't have any clothes to begin with.

"Mondo, help me!" Yelled James at Meowth. Meowth scratched him in the face.

Cassidy passed out the cards and the game began. Meowth had to take something off on the first round because he lost.

"What do I take off?" Asked Meowth.

"How about that shiny thing?"

"All right..."

"Take it off! Take it off!" Everyone chanted, since it was Meowth's last piece of 'clothing'. Meowth put up a sexy pose and removed his gold plate. Butch passed out and everyone was cheering. Meowth stuck his gold plate back on and ran out of the room in embarrassment, where someone's pet Magikarp killed him.

"How about another round?" Asked Cassidy.

Later...

Mondo was wearing all of his clothing. Butch was wearing boxers and a shirt. James was just wearing boxers. Cassidy had everything on, and Jesse was wearing a bra and underwear.

Everyone cautiously put their cards down. Cassidy and Mondo put down royal flushes again.

"Tell me again, what does that mean?" Asked Mondo, who didn't know what cards were. Nobody felt like answering him.

A few spare cards fell out of Cassidy's sleeve, but nobody suspected anything.

"Well, it looks like you lost this round Jesse!" Said Cassidy.

Jesse looked at herself in fear. Just a bra and underwear. She swore angrily at Cassidy and began to unhook her bra...

Outside the room...

A waiter walks past a crowd of men who are staring intently into someone's window. The waiter eagerly joins the crowd.

Suddenly, a fearful scream is heard, and blood comes out from under the door. The men at the window are laughing their heads off.

"Can I draw you? AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Said the voices in the room.

James and Mondo run out the door, blood gushing out of their noses. They have fearful looks on their faces. They suddenly run down the hall.

The waiter stares at the blood on the floor, then pretends he didn't notice and walks down the hall in the opposite direction.

Butch fell down in the doorway, he was unconscious because Jesse had whacked him with her mallet for staring.

Cassidy blinked and looked around the room. "I guess that means we can't play cards anymore tonight."

"Better not," Said Jesse angrily, putting on a dress and wading through the blood towards the door.

"Good-Night Ms. Jesse!" Said Cassidy with a wink, because she could tell the future.

Jesse growled and walked out the door. "Night Ms. Cassidy."

When Jesse closed the door, she was immediately confronted by James. He quickly wiped his nose with his sleeve. "Can I draw you?"

Jesse grinned. "OK!" She then ran into the room next to Cassidy's, which she shared with her fiancee. She kicked an unconscious Butch off the couch (nobody cared to wonder how he go there).

Later...

The waiter walked past that door again. Suddenly he heard another frightful scream, and more blood poured out the door. He looked questioningly in the door, then shut it and ran.

James stumbled out the door, holding a drawing. He wiped his nose with his sleeve (he was still wearing only boxers). Any naughty bits on the drawing were covered in little red splotches.

Jesse appeared behind him, wearing only a robe. "Let's make out in a car!" She yelled.

Before James could protest, she dragged him down to the place where large objects are kept. Then she threw him in the car and jumped in after him. She slammed the door shut. A minute later, another scream was heard and the windows turned red.

Later...

"More vodka please... and where the hell is my martini?!" Slurred Butch. He waved a bottle in the air as if saluting some unseen thing.

"Here you go sir," Said the bartender, who happened to be Moe from The Simpsons.

"Ooo... lookie here!" He yelled, waving around a green diamond. "Hurt ov da seeeeeee diiieeeemon!" He said, obviously drunk.

"Heart of the Sea Diamond?"

Butch was laying on the counter, asleep and drooling.

Somewhere else...

"Whee, that was fun!" Said James, oblivious to the fact that he was scared to death.

Jesse laughed. "Look at the stars! Aren't they romantic?"

"Yeah, and look at that beautiful iceberg!"

"Oiceburg! Roight ahid!" Giovanni called faintly in an English accent.

CCCRRRUUUUUNNNNNCCCCCHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

"Uh-oh..." They said. Then everyone ran out of their rooms and ran around in circles on the deck. James suddenly realized that he was in handcuffs in the mail room.

"JAMES!!!" Screamed Jesse, running past Butch and Cassidy who were making out. She took an ax out of nowhere and almost chopped James's hands off. She then dragged him down the hallway, which was filling quickly with ice cold... Jell-O???

Pink Jell-O was filling the hallways fast. They ran into a gate, which Mondo broke open with a bench.

"Thanks Meowth!" Yelled James, following him up the stairs.

"I'm not Meowth." He replied coldly.

Suddenly Meowth fell from the sky and landed on James's head.

"Woit's happening??" Asked Meowth.

"The ship is sinking!!!!!!" Yelled Jesse.

"Muahaha! Thought you could escape from ME, didn't you!?" Shouted Butch, who was standing in front of them. He was holding a water gun. Suddenly Cassidy appeared and kicked the water gun out of his hand.

"GO NOW!" She yelled at them. Then she started kissing Butch.

James, Mondo, Meowth, and Jesse stumbled onto the deck where people were still running in circles and falling into rowboats. James tripped over a carrot.

Suddenly all the rowboats fell off the boat.

"NOOO!!!" Yelled Mondo, panicking and running in faster circles until he fell on his side, twitching every few seconds.

"It will be ok, Meowth!" Said James.

"I'm NOT Meowth!!!" He yelled, jumping up and glaring at James.

Suddenly a chimney fell on Mondo and Meowth, killing them instantly. Jesse, James, and Meowth fearfully ran to the back of the ship and clung tightly to the railing while the ship began to fall over. Meowth fell off the railing and hit the propellers, killing him instantly.

Butch and Cassidy were also clinging tightly to the railing. Suddenly the ship went underwater and everyone was sucked in by the suction. Seconds later everyone was back on the surface. Meowth drowned. James found a door and sat down on it. Jesse swam over to him and grabbed his hands.

"I'll never let go, Jess!" Said James dramatically.

By then James was so distracted with the thought of coffee that he accidentally let go of Jesse.

Some people on boats came, so James grabbed a dead guy and blew on his whistle. The people on the boat got annoyed by the sound and rowed the boat over to James to tell him to shut-up, but they ended up pulling him on. Butch, Meowth, and Cassidy were on the boat.

James looked at the green diamond in his hand that he found on the floor of the row boat.

In the future...

The old man looked at the ocean. He also looked at the green diamond.

"Hey... waitaminit, this is an emerald, not a diamond!!!" He yelled. "The jewler lied to me so I don't want it anymore!"

The old man tried to throw the emerald over the edge, but he was too weak. A seagull came and ate the emerald instead. Then another one came and ate the old man. Then a third one ate Meowth.

THE END!



BTW, the quote "Where the hell is my martini?!" is something Black Dove (aka Combat Hamster) made up, and I stole it from her ^_-