Prince Of Tennis Fan Fiction ❯ Learning To Land ❯ Learning to Land by Suteishichic. Chapter One Hundred Three ~ Mukahi ( Chapter 105 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: suteishichic 
Anime/Manga: Prince Of Tennis Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance / Drama | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 08.25.2007 | Pages: 5 | Words: 6.4K | Visits: 233 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: Prince Of Tennis Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance / Drama | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 08.25.2007 | Pages: 5 | Words: 6.4K | Visits: 233 | Status: Work In Progress
Learning to Land by Suteishichic. Chapter One Hundred Three ~ Mukahi
Warnings: Yaoi, Love, Angst, Fluff, and Lots of Sex. Some kink. You've been warned ;)
Disclaimer: Nope not mine. Still in my dreams. ;)
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Just when he was about to tell Yuushi to stop, the tensai looked at him. Sounding raw and vulnerable,
Yuushi finally said, "Ask me anything, Gakuto. Anything you want to know about me and I'll tell you."
A million questions popped into Gakuto's head and he shook them away. Yuushi musta mistook his
gesture to be him saying no.
"Oh." The tensai sagged and deflated as if Gakuto told him that he didn't like him or something.
Gakuto put his hand back on Yuushi's mouth before Yuushi could fill the silence with a bad joke to
cover his hurt feelings. He said to Yuushi, "I shook my head because I didn't know where to start. I
wanna know everything, Yuushi. I really do, but I want you to tell me when you're ready. It's not gonna
change how I feel if I know or not, and what happened to you took a long time to happen. I don't think
you can just tell me everything right now anyway. When it's the right time, you'll just tell me. But
Yuushi, I do wanna know." Gakuto looked at him. Yuushi's eyes had tears in them and it made Gakuto
feel like crying again. Which sucked. They had been crying all damn night and this was supposed to be
fun. "I wanna know everything Yuushi, but when you're ready, you know?"
Yuushi nodded. His fingers were still on the tensai's mouth. Around them Yuushi said quietly as if
Gakuto gave him some kinda present he had always wanted, "Thank you."
Gakuto smiled a little and shrugged, "Welcome." He thought about everything they had shared and
talked about that night. It was too much. Too much bad and not enough good--although there had been
parts that were unbelievable. The bath, dinner, the kissing, and that orgasm for starters. He looked at
Yuushi who seemed to be trying to find something to say. Gakuto spoke first, "Know what I want? I
want that feeling back. The one after how good you made me feel. When I just wanted to kiss you and I
felt all good and wanted you to feel that way too. So, will you kiss me, Yuushi? Please?" Gakuto had
this sudden dread that like that first night at Jiroh's, Yuushi might say no.
That Yuushi might have, but this one, Gakuto's Yuushi, he didn't. Instead he made Gakuto smile by
saying overly-lovey and serious, "Of course my prince. Your wish is my desire." Yuushi took Gakuto
into his strong arms and kissed him. It felt safe and warm and lovey but in a really good way that
pushed away everything negative that they had felt, said, and done, and even all the things they still had
to deal with in the coming days. It all got pushed far far away.
This felt good and important and fun enough that it was okay to stay in the here and the now. Plus
everything felt deeper as if it were all amplified somehow. Magnified. That's the word Yuushi would
probably use and then make some lame pun about magnificent and magnets. Gakuto stored that away
and tried to focus on the soft touch of Yuushi's lips and the rush of the tensai's breath. Yuushi pulled
back and smiled all dopey and Gakuto knew, knew, that the tensai was thinkin something stupid. Like
next stop heaven, or back to heaven we go. Something lame like that, but still kinda funny. Just funny
enough that when Gakuto tossed back his head and snorted a laugh, Yuushi joined in.
And the next thing he knew, Gakuto gasped because it felt like his every nerve ending suddenly
screamed back to life. Because in that fraction of a second, the little time it took for Gakuto to laugh,
the damn tensai already started moving. Yuushi's mouth was on his right nipple all swirly, his right
hand was on Gakuto's partial erection, and the fingers on Yuushi's other hand were teasing Gakuto's
entrance. If it had been anyone else, Gakuto probably woulda kicked them for moving too damn fast.
Actually, he thought of hitting Yuushi, not real hard, but hitting him still.
But then the big dope glanced up at him with this look of pure adoration before giving Gakuto's left
nipple some action. And Yuushi drawled as if he had all the time in the world, "I do so love it when I
have your full attention to the task at hand, my beloved..."
The tensai bent his head and sucked kinda hard at Gakuto's left nipple. Not hard enough to hurt, just
hard enough to let Gakuto know Yuushi noticed that his attention kept drifting away. But hell, they had
been talkin about a lotta crap tonight. Yuushi couldn't get annoyed at him when it was the tensai's own
damn fault for makin Gakuto think about all this stuff in the first place!
Anyone else and Gakuto woulda definitely punched them. "Sh..shut up Yuushi!" Gakuto spat back but
only half-heartedly because the tensai was doing that really good thing where he flicked around
Gakuto's nipple with his tongue. There was no way Gakuto was going to moan to let him know he liked
it. No way in hell. "You want me to pay attention then don't let me get so bored..." Gakuto grinned.
That was a nice one. He thought better under pressure.
But so did the tensai, damn it. Whatever Yuushi was gonna do, it was gonna probably be good. Gakuto
was a little thrilled at their playing like this. It was exactly what they needed after how serious
everything else was. At least, he hoped Yuushi was playing.
Yuushi raised one eyebrow, but it was the left one. The one he did when he wasn't really mad, just
playing. With a very straight face and sounding bored like Atobe did, Yuushi said painfully slow, "As
you wish, my prince. Your every wish is my desire. Any requests?"
Gakuto laughed. If he told Yuushi to sing the guy probably woulda. "Yeah, make it good. Make it hot,
and if you can give me another one of those like before that would be great. Bet I wouldn't pass out if
you made me come during too." Gakuto smiled wide at the thought, and then he worried slightly, "Um,
nothin that hurts or too weird, okay Yuushi? And, um...if it's okay, I wanna play with you too either
during or when you're done. And then, um...can we go to sleep like we always do? Cause it's gettin
kinda late, but I still wanna do this first, you know?"
Yuushi's serious face softened to the goofy one. He smiled and nodded, "Okay sweetheart. Nothing that
hurts and it will be your turn next if you would like. Gakuto, what I would like to do we haven't quite
done yet, but it is not anything too weird and I believe you will enjoy it. May I try? Please? If you want
me to stop or switch to something else, just tell me and I will, but...I really do think you will like
it...and it's...it's something I've wanted to try with you for a very, very long time." Yuushi just froze in
place as if he was giving Gakuto time to think it over.
So Gakuto pretended to think because he already knew without any doubts if it really was something
Yuushi really wanted to do, and by the way Yuushi was looking at Gakuto it very much was, Gakuto
eventually was gonna have to try it. Not because he necessarily wanted to or because he was even
being nice, more because Gakuto knew if it was something Yuushi really wanted, the tensai would
figure out a way to get Gakuto to agree. In a lotta ways, Yuushi was very good at bargaining. Mostly
because he had already out-thought whoever it was that was stupid enough to try to pull one over on
the tensai. Gakuto was not dumb, but he wasn't that stupid to think he could fool Yuushi. About the best
he could do was try to get something he wanted in exchange, "So you really think I'll like it? And it's
not too weird and won't hurt? And if I don't like it or say stop, you'll stop? You promise?"
"Yes. I swear to you, sweetheart." Yuushi somehow kept his face serious.
Gakuto couldn't and laughed, "Shut up! Don't think I didn't hear all the other stupid crappy things you
called me either! I was bein nice, but quit it! I'm not a girl! You'd better not say that in front of any of
the guys, Yuushi. I mean it. You ever say that kinda goofy crap in front of another living soul, and I will
never forgive you! I mean it! I'll make you wish you'd never met me, Yuushi."
Yuushi smiled and blushed slightly. Gakuto thought he was making some kind of headway with cutting
out those stupid phrases from the tensai's vocabulary when Yuushi said all dopey, "That will never
happen...Gakuto."
Gakuto could see Yuushi wasn't getting it. He was just gonna say stupid things like that in his head if he
couldn't say them out loud. Which was better than all the guys hearing, but still! Now Gakuto had to
wonder how long Yuushi had been saying his name while silently calling him other things. Gods,
Yuushi was such a dork! Gakuto sighed annoyed but he also couldn't help thinking no one had ever
said things like that to him before. He had to fight the smile off his face when he thought about it. Who
would call him sweetheart? It was ridiculous. And even more stupid because Yuushi had meant every
word he said. Yuushi would only call him sweetheart if he meant he thought not only that Gakuto was a
sweetheart, but that Yuushi thought he had a sweet heart.
Over the years, Gakuto'd been called a lot of things. At school Gakuto had been called everything from
mean to cold to heartless to a bastard to a slut. Usually he didn't mind because Gakuto knew deep down
he was a good person, even if no one ever saw that he was, he knew it. Well, he did and his mom did,
but no one else. His mom told him all the time what a good and big heart he had. How he was a loving
person who deserved the very best and who deserved be loved. Sure, Gakuto sometimes felt like he
was a bad person because of things he said or did, but he tried to do more good than bad. He tried to
right any wrongs he caused. He tried to look out for the underdogs and give everyone a fair shot.
People were jealous of Gakuto because of his social status. He was a sub-reg and that made things
tough for any guy at Hyoutei. Plus, people worried because he had so much information on everyone.
But when they said things or judged him, they didn't know Gakuto. Not really. No one really did.
Except maybe his mom.
And Yuushi.
Stupid Yuushi who called him sweetheart as if it was a natural thing. Yuushi really knew him, even
more than Gakuto's mother did, and Yuushi musta thought that it was true or he wouldn't have said that.
Stupid tensai for making Gakuto feel all good and lovey like this. Damn it, Yuushi had him thinkin like
a stupid girl. So stupid that Gakuto almost said okay without remembering to bargain more.
Yuushi didn't forget though. He musta thought Gakuto thinkin through all that sweetheart crap was
Gakuto hesitating or wanting more before he agreed. "Gakuto," the tensai said, but in a lovey way to let
Gakuto know he was thinking something goofy like sweetheart or darling, "Is there anything I can do
or say to perhaps..." Yuushi kissed him all soft once by the corner of his mouth. "Persuade..." Yuushi
like a whisper brushed his lips across Gakuto's. "You?" Gakuto could feel Yuushi's lips were more
puffy than normal from all their kissing. It felt really hot. Even hotter when Yuushi licked his tongue
between Gakuto's lips, parting them softly and then he pulled back knowing Gakuto wanted a better
kiss than this light, soft teasing.
Gakuto smiled at him in a perfect re-creation of his father when he had a hot sale on the line, "I'm not
sure. How bad do you want it, Yuushi?" He heard the rasp of lust in his own voice, but he didn't care
when he saw the effect his words were having on the tensai. He reached his mouth up like he was
gonna kiss Yuushi, but at the last moment went for the tensai's ear instead. Softly he teased, "How bad
do you wanna do this to me, Yuushi? You can at least tell me that. Help me to help you. How bad?" He
sucked on Yuushi's earlobe to give the tensai a little time to think. He even thought about leaving a little
hickey there because no one but Yuushi would know what it was, but everyone would ask about it.
Gakuto smiled at the wicked thought and whispered, "Just how bad do you want me, Yuushi?"
Yuushi to his surprise gave a low, sexy laugh, "Does 'desperately' sound too needy? Because I've been
told needy is a turn-off."
Gakuto smiled, "Depends. How desperately we talkin? Like you'll make me dinner for a week
desperately? Or we talkin you'll switch and be my lab partner if I let you do whatever it is you wanna
do?"
"Whatever I want?" Yuushi raised both eyebrows in surprise and kinda like in a challenge.
"Maybe..." Gakuto said and then quickly qualified, "I guess...as long as I'll like it and it doesn't hurt."
"And..." Yuushi reminded, "as long as it isn't too weird? Do you trust me, Gakuto?"
"Yeah," Gakuto said with a shrug, "I trust you. Of course I trust you. So...what's it gonna be?"
Yuushi trailed his hand suggestively down Gakuto's chest stopping at a nipple to stroke it to full
hardness, "That all depends on what exactly is being offered. Dinner for a week doesn't qualify me for
whatever I want to do, does it?"
Gakuto had to laugh, "Ha! Not even close, Yuushi. Lab partners. Switch with me. You won't regret it.
You know you wanna. Come on! Tell you what...I'll throw in bein your first also." He turned more to
face Yuushi and looked deep into his eyes. Gakuto teasingly gave Yuushi what was supposed to be his
most wanton and lusty look, but Yuushi was looking at him so intensely and strange it felt weird, but
not in a bad way. Everything got changed up somehow to where for several moments they just kept
looking at each other. For a long time. It wasn't like a staring contest, but it was something Gakuto
never did before and he was feeling a strange tingle in his chest. It wasn't so much a turn-on, although
he was turned on, but this was more like a warmth. That spread everywhere. Like the peaceful warmth
he felt after that orgasm but this was in his chest instead of all over his body. It was strange, but it was
so good. Gakuto wondered if it was from the orgasm, or from Yuushi, or from what, but he felt it would
sound stupid to ask.
Not that Yuushi ever said he thought Gakuto was stupid, but he had seen first-hand several times
Yuushi dumped people for being really dumb. Or saying stupid things. Or asking idiotic questions.
Gakuto didn't want Yuushi to now think maybe he was like that, but he wondered if Yuushi felt it too.
The tensai's hand was on Gakuto's hip. The rounded part of his palm was over Gakuto's hipbone and his
fingers were spread over the hollow Gakuto had there. Yuushi's thumb rubbed softly in a nice way.
Yuushi was looking at him all goofy and lovey, but it was kind of nice. Gakuto started to wonder what
Yuushi was thinking while he looked back at him. Maybe Yuushi was worried. Or scared. He didn't
look like it, but just in case Gakuto said, "I wanna, Yuushi. I wanna be your first. I wanna be with you."
His inside arm was curled up and his hand was touching the middle of Yuushi's chest. He could feel the
tensai's heartbeat. He could measure the rise and fall of Yuushi's every breath. Gakuto's other hand was
resting on Yuushi's big upper arm muscle. It was solid as a rock and sculpted perfectly from hours of
practice.
Yuushi had a tennis tan. Gakuto knew without looking Yuushi's lower arm was suntanned but his
shoulder was a much lighter color. His skin was naturally a little darker than Gakuto's and warm. His
skin always felt warm to the touch as if Yuushi had just been standing out in the sun. On impulse,
Gakuto kissed the hollow at the base of Yuushi's throat. Then he kissed and licked his way up Yuushi's
neck, over his Adams apple and when Gakuto kept going he felt Yuushi moan. His throat vibrated
against Gakuto's lips and felt like Yuushi was growling. Or purring. Yuushi sighed softly, "Gakuto..."
The sound of the tensai's whisper made that warm melty feeling in Gakuto's chest combine with the
turned-on butterflies kinda feeling he usually felt in his belly. Gakuto reached Yuushi's chin and he
pulled back to look at the results of his work. Yuushi looked all goofy and like he was swimming in a
sea of lovey feelings and lust. To try to get something from him now Gakuto felt would be unfair and
just wrong. He smiled having decided, "You don't have to switch lab partners or make me dinner for a
week, Yuushi. I trust you. You can do whatever you want." Silently out of habit Gakuto added and
wished... just please don't hurt me...
"No Gakuto," Yuushi said and went to adjust his glasses which he didn't need and wasn't wearing. He
smiled slightly as if just now getting it was a silly habit he had. "A deal's a deal. Gakuto, I want you to
be my first. I want to be with you. I want to make dinner for you this week. I want to be your lab
partner. And, I want to make love to you now in my own way. I will not hurt you and I will not do
anything too weird. I promise. You can even stop me if you don't like it and I will hold up my end of
the bargain. I swear it. I love you."
"I..." Gakuto went to answer and before he could bite back the shocking word that he went to say
without thinking, he realized it was stuck in his throat and wouldn't come out. He figured it was strange
and lucky at the same time. Instead he said, "I swear it too, okay?" Gakuto grinned before Yuushi could
answer, "You really suck at bargaining, Yuushi. I woulda done it for one dinner if you'da asked all
nice." Thrilled he laughed, "You're really gonna be my lab partner now?"
A slow smile spread across Yuushi's face. It was the same look Yuushi always had when he beat
someone good at chess. Right after they made a fatal mistake. It was the same one he also had when he
figured out an easy way to defeat someone good on the tennis courts, "Yes. I suppose we should wait to
switch until after this week's project so our teacher doesn't object, and please let me handle my current
lab partner. We've had some problems lately..."
"Yeah. I know. He's been cheatin off you. Did you only just notice?" Gakuto rolled his eyes
exasperated, "Why do you think I've been pushin you so hard to switch? Yeah, it'll be fun and yeah, I
hate the crazy one I have now, but I was tryin to help you before the teacher..." Gakuto loved chemistry.
It was something he had never expected to be good at or into, but he just was. It was kinda cool and
interesting. Gakuto really liked it and he was pretty sure Yuushi knew how much he did.
Even though their teacher was not a very good sensei and an idiot because he clearly despised Yuushi,
it had become Gakuto's favorite class. It was one of the reasons Gakuto didn't jump on Yuushi's offer of
lab partners the beginning of the year. Gakuto found it funny how so many of their teachers seemed to
go out of their way to not like Yuushi. And the more they didn't like Yuushi, the harder the tensai went
out of his way to get in their good graces which failed miserably. Eventually, Yuushi turned their hating
him into a joke. The more rude a teacher was to Yuushi, the more sincere and respectful the tensai
appeared. It was comedic genius on Yuushi's part that made the teachers look bad, but Gakuto lately
didn't think it was funny anymore.
Back then it was hilarious. Yuushi seemed so weird and goofy. Gakuto's current lab partner seemed
nice and pretty. She said if he agreed to be her partner she would do all the work. This was back when
Gakuto didn't know how much he would like the class. This was back when he didn't know how much
his turning Yuushi down for the pretty girl musta hurt the tensai. Gakuto wanted to set things right. For
a lot of reasons.
Because now he knew Yuushi woulda been the better choice. The girl was a psycho stalker. She was
way too into Gakuto, and her father was a pharmacist. She knew too much about strange chemistry
stuff, and because of that and a lot of other things she did and said, Gakuto strongly suspected she was
the one who drugged his drink that night.
Sato just happened to conveniently show up. Just more bad luck and crappy choices for Gakuto.
Not for the first time, Gakuto realized he had really awful taste in people. Or maybe he just got
suckered in by someone who seemed all nice because when they met, he thought she was kinda cute.
She wasn't so cute when she so easily got Gakuto more of that drug for Atobe. Of course, she never
knew it was for Atobe. She thought it was for Gakuto and she also thought they together were gonna
use it to have some fun. She had no idea it was for Atobe--just like Gakuto had no idea Atobe was
gonna use it on Shishido. Wheels within wheels. The Hyoutei way. Gakuto learned a lot that day. About
her, about Atobe, about Shishido, but mostly he learned he made a really idiotic series of mistakes by
only seeing the now and not the possible problems the future could hold if you were too stupid and
trusting.
"You...noticed? Oh, you couldn't tell me?" Yuushi frowned and between his eyes this little crease
formed and then relaxed as he probably solved what was buried under the sphinx. Gakuto couldn't have
told him about his lab partner cheating. They had an honor code--laughable as that seemed--but at
Hyoutei it did work. It was just a little warped so everyone could live with it. If Gakuto told Yuushi
then the tensai was honor bound to tell their teacher. If Yuushi knew and didn't report it, he was in
trouble too for 'helping' the jerk who was using him to cheat. Cheating meant expulsion. "How long
ago did you notice?"
Gakuto was surprised and annoyed, "Damn it, Yuushi! You knew? How long did you know? I knew for
sure from the last quiz two weeks ago. I thought he mighta been before then, but I saw him that time do
it with my own eyes. And I didn't tell you because the teacher is one of the ones who is a real bastard to
you. I don't know why you don't stand up to him. He's just jealous of you, you know? But if I'da told
you then he woulda found some way to blame you. He woulda loved that! Genius tensai caught helping
other kid cheat and both expelled. I've been tryin to get you to switch and I was gonna set a trap for
your stupid lab partner when our next quiz happens. Not sure what yet, but I was gonna. Yuushi, you
can't let people do things like that to you or bring you down. You're too trusting!"
Smiling as if Gakuto said something lovey, Yuushi said all moony, "I am?"
"Yeah," Gakuto was really annoyed and thought how to get Yuushi out of this delicately. "Look, I'm
gonna handle our teacher for you. The guy really likes me and he'll let me switch. I'm gonna make it so
I'm asking for the favor for me and you're stuck with me. He'll do it if he thinks you won't like it at all.
And we're not gonna wait until this week's project. I'll get the teacher to give us an extra credit thing or
something..."
Suddenly Gakuto grinned at his wicked inspiration, "Hey! I know! I'll have him give us and them
projects to make up for this week being screwed up with the switch. Your idiot former partner will
cheat off her and she's dyslexic. I know and the teacher knows, but your idiot lab partner won't know.
She gets the right answers but her math is always screwed up on paper! When he copies her stuff, he'll
be busted! It's perfect! And Yuushi?" This was important so Gakuto paused for dramatic effect.
He flopped over to his back and sighed trying to find the right words. Words that wouldn't hurt Yuushi,
"Look, I'm not good with sayin stuff like this so I'm just gonna say it. I like you, okay? I like how damn
smart you are even if it is annoying and even if it screws up the grade curve in every class. Hyoutei's an
escalator school. We're all automatically accepted into Hyoutei high school. There's no reason for you
to dumb yourself down so everyone likes you. And you need to stop bein nice to the teachers thinkin
that if you're nice to them then they'll like you. They aren't gonna like you and it's their own damn loss.
They're idiots and they're jealous of you. Seriously, I know you act stupid all the time and it bugs the
hell outta me."
Gakuto turned his head to look up at Yuushi. He met Yuushi's eyes and said, "Just be yourself. I know
you're the smartest, so be the smartest. I'll still like you. I'll bet that I'll like you even more if you do.
With me by your side no one can touch you here. Not the students and not the teachers. I'm not gonna
let anyone hurt you or make fun of you. Don't be less than who you are and don't take any more crap
from anyone. As a favor to me, will you try it my way and be yourself? 'Be your potential'...?" The last
was said in the tone of their Coach, but it wasn't mocking. Gakuto respected the man too much to make
fun of him in any way despite all the brilliant guy's eccentricities. Some things and some people you
just did not make fun of.
Yuushi stared into his eyes for a long moment. Gakuto wondered if Yuushi felt caught or surprised
because he looked kinda like both. Maybe other people didn't realize just how damn smart Yuushi was,
but Gakuto did. He saw Yuushi make wrong answers on tests and make other mistakes on purpose to
not mess up the class average. Gakuto saw how the teachers smugly made fun of Yuushi to his face
while fake-acting like they liked him. It had to stop. Yuushi was too good for all of that.
When he spoke, Yuushi was quiet and his voice sounded rough, "If that is truly what you want then I
will, but I warn you it will not be easy."
Gakuto began the part he remembered of another one of their Coach's frequent inspirational speeches,
"'Nothing worth having is ever easy and most of the time to get what you want, you are going to have
to fight'..."
Yuushi the brain finished it, "'But when you are done, you will have earned your victory with your own
blood, sweat, and tears which will make it all the more sweet and rewarding. You have been brought
together here and given these chances and opportunities because it is believed you are the best of the
best. Prove it. Show everyone that you are the best. Be your potential.'" Yuushi was quiet for a long
minute and then sighed, "So, do you think anyone else has noticed?"
"That you dumb yourself down?" Gakuto thought and shrugged, "A few of the teachers maybe. And
Atobe probably. But I don't think anyone else. So? You gonna really do it?" Gakuto was a little awed by
the possibilities, but at the same time annoyed by them. Taking the muzzle off that giant brain was like
letting loose his own personal tsunami. You didn't know where the waves would wash but you knew
they were coming and the after-effects would be globally landscape altering. At the same time it kinda
sucked because Gakuto would be one of the people who would have to work harder so that when the
curve was gone his grades wouldn't suffer. Yuushi would just have to help him if he started to fall
behind, because Yuushi deserved to be his best self. Everyone did.
Gakuto had a feeling this was a very good and important thing he was doing for Yuushi. Very good,
important, and loving. The kind of thing someone with a sweet heart would do for someone they really
cared about.
The tensai's hand was on Gakuto's cheek. His thumb was tracing the contours of Gakuto's cheekbone
where it once upon a time was cracked and broken. In a very off-handed way Yuushi said, "Yes, for you
I'll be my best self. You're worth it." Yuushi smiled slightly as if thinking some silly tensai pun to
himself in his head. The pad of his thumb traced around Gakuto's lips and then his thumb crossed over
the center of them, parting them slightly in the middle and slipping into Gakuto's mouth. Gakuto
sucked on it teasingly because he could. He enjoyed watching that hot turned-on look return to Yuushi's
eyes as Gakuto flicked his tongue around between sucks. Gakuto liked watching with Yuushi.
Everything was totally different with the tensai.
Usually Gakuto watched out of a need to protect himself from Sato's wrath or to know how much
longer he was gonna have to endure some idiot's hands all over him before he was free to go. With
Yuushi, Gakuto watched because it was...enjoyable. It was fun turning him on. It was pleasurable to
make Yuushi feel good and that was new.
So was the other reason Gakuto watched Yuushi. He watched to make sure Yuushi was okay with what
was going on. It was Gakuto's own way of caring about him. With whatever Yuushi had been through
and even though he had done lots of sex stuff, in a lotta ways, Yuushi was innocent. Innocent and naive
and even though he seemed okay, Gakuto knew from experience Yuushi really wasn't as okay as he
seemed. Sex was weird like that. It felt good and at times like this fooling around was fun and all, but
you never knew when something might make you suddenly feel worried or scared. Yuushi took very
good care of him and it was the least Gakuto could do to do the same for the tensai.
He smiled around Yuushi's thumb thinking about how good Yuushi took care of him. How good Yuushi
made him feel. Gakuto thought to himself if this was as real as Yuushi was makin things feel, then
whatever was going on with them was very good. It suddenly made sense to Gakuto that feeling like
this about someone and having them feel this back for you was the reason all the fangirls went crazy
and why people cried so bad when things ended and you broke up. Gakuto always maintained that love
and everything about it sucked. All the times people came to Gakuto insane with jealousy and longing
left him feeling jaded. All those people who were desperate and willing to pay whatever price just for a
scrap of information on the person they loved left him feeling ill. He held too many hands while
someone cried bitterly over love lost. Gakuto just never saw the point of love before.
But as he watched Yuushi looking at him so adoringly while he was just doing something as stupid as
sucking the tensai's thumb, Gakuto suddenly understood the rest of it. It was like everyone else
understanding a joke, but Gakuto not getting the point until just now. Or like everyone read a book on
love and said how wonderful it was, but all Gakuto saw before now was a bunch of miserable and
hurting people and what the hell was so wonderful about that?
This though, this feeling between him and Yuushi, how things were, all of this was wonderful. It was
like that unbelievable orgasm earlier. He never saw it coming but he wanted more and more. Gakuto
knew without even thinking about it--he was hooked on these feelings. He wanted more and more of
them. He never wanted it to stop and he wanted Yuushi to feel this incredibly good feeling too.
It occurred to Gakuto for the first time this is why people make themselves so unhappy and crazy over
love. They have a small piece of this feeling between him and Yuushi and they get hooked. Most of the
time though, Gakuto knew the people who came to him desperate for info and crying, they were in love
alone. The other person sometimes wasn't even aware of them or interested in them so Gakuto always
thought they kinda broke their own hearts.
It never made sense to him before, but now that he was here and feeling this, it was all clear. Normally,
all this lovey stuff woulda scared the hell outta him. The difference now was because these feelings
were with Yuushi. Gakuto was pretty sure Yuushi was feeling the same things, so Gakuto felt guarded
but at the same time he realized he felt--safe. Maybe because this felt too good to worry. Yeah, they had
a lot of bad stuff that happened to each of them, but Gakuto felt good about things. He felt high and
happy and hopeful. It was crazy. It was ridiculous. It was wonderful. He felt hopeful together they
could get over all the bad stuff. Together. And he would bet anything that Yuushi felt the same. Maybe
that was the secret of love. That you both had to feel it. And maybe both had to want it.
Gakuto didn't know. He wasn't even a hundred percent positive that was exactly how he was feeling
because he never felt anything like this before. It was wonderful and scary both at the same time and
because he knew Yuushi took such good care of him, he decided to take a chance. "Before you do what
you wanna do to me, will you do me a favor? Please?" Gakuto added the please so Yuushi knew he was
serious.
He wasn't joking around about this.
Warnings: Yaoi, Love, Angst, Fluff, and Lots of Sex. Some kink. You've been warned ;)
Disclaimer: Nope not mine. Still in my dreams. ;)
------------------------------------
Just when he was about to tell Yuushi to stop, the tensai looked at him. Sounding raw and vulnerable,
Yuushi finally said, "Ask me anything, Gakuto. Anything you want to know about me and I'll tell you."
A million questions popped into Gakuto's head and he shook them away. Yuushi musta mistook his
gesture to be him saying no.
"Oh." The tensai sagged and deflated as if Gakuto told him that he didn't like him or something.
Gakuto put his hand back on Yuushi's mouth before Yuushi could fill the silence with a bad joke to
cover his hurt feelings. He said to Yuushi, "I shook my head because I didn't know where to start. I
wanna know everything, Yuushi. I really do, but I want you to tell me when you're ready. It's not gonna
change how I feel if I know or not, and what happened to you took a long time to happen. I don't think
you can just tell me everything right now anyway. When it's the right time, you'll just tell me. But
Yuushi, I do wanna know." Gakuto looked at him. Yuushi's eyes had tears in them and it made Gakuto
feel like crying again. Which sucked. They had been crying all damn night and this was supposed to be
fun. "I wanna know everything Yuushi, but when you're ready, you know?"
Yuushi nodded. His fingers were still on the tensai's mouth. Around them Yuushi said quietly as if
Gakuto gave him some kinda present he had always wanted, "Thank you."
Gakuto smiled a little and shrugged, "Welcome." He thought about everything they had shared and
talked about that night. It was too much. Too much bad and not enough good--although there had been
parts that were unbelievable. The bath, dinner, the kissing, and that orgasm for starters. He looked at
Yuushi who seemed to be trying to find something to say. Gakuto spoke first, "Know what I want? I
want that feeling back. The one after how good you made me feel. When I just wanted to kiss you and I
felt all good and wanted you to feel that way too. So, will you kiss me, Yuushi? Please?" Gakuto had
this sudden dread that like that first night at Jiroh's, Yuushi might say no.
That Yuushi might have, but this one, Gakuto's Yuushi, he didn't. Instead he made Gakuto smile by
saying overly-lovey and serious, "Of course my prince. Your wish is my desire." Yuushi took Gakuto
into his strong arms and kissed him. It felt safe and warm and lovey but in a really good way that
pushed away everything negative that they had felt, said, and done, and even all the things they still had
to deal with in the coming days. It all got pushed far far away.
This felt good and important and fun enough that it was okay to stay in the here and the now. Plus
everything felt deeper as if it were all amplified somehow. Magnified. That's the word Yuushi would
probably use and then make some lame pun about magnificent and magnets. Gakuto stored that away
and tried to focus on the soft touch of Yuushi's lips and the rush of the tensai's breath. Yuushi pulled
back and smiled all dopey and Gakuto knew, knew, that the tensai was thinkin something stupid. Like
next stop heaven, or back to heaven we go. Something lame like that, but still kinda funny. Just funny
enough that when Gakuto tossed back his head and snorted a laugh, Yuushi joined in.
And the next thing he knew, Gakuto gasped because it felt like his every nerve ending suddenly
screamed back to life. Because in that fraction of a second, the little time it took for Gakuto to laugh,
the damn tensai already started moving. Yuushi's mouth was on his right nipple all swirly, his right
hand was on Gakuto's partial erection, and the fingers on Yuushi's other hand were teasing Gakuto's
entrance. If it had been anyone else, Gakuto probably woulda kicked them for moving too damn fast.
Actually, he thought of hitting Yuushi, not real hard, but hitting him still.
But then the big dope glanced up at him with this look of pure adoration before giving Gakuto's left
nipple some action. And Yuushi drawled as if he had all the time in the world, "I do so love it when I
have your full attention to the task at hand, my beloved..."
The tensai bent his head and sucked kinda hard at Gakuto's left nipple. Not hard enough to hurt, just
hard enough to let Gakuto know Yuushi noticed that his attention kept drifting away. But hell, they had
been talkin about a lotta crap tonight. Yuushi couldn't get annoyed at him when it was the tensai's own
damn fault for makin Gakuto think about all this stuff in the first place!
Anyone else and Gakuto woulda definitely punched them. "Sh..shut up Yuushi!" Gakuto spat back but
only half-heartedly because the tensai was doing that really good thing where he flicked around
Gakuto's nipple with his tongue. There was no way Gakuto was going to moan to let him know he liked
it. No way in hell. "You want me to pay attention then don't let me get so bored..." Gakuto grinned.
That was a nice one. He thought better under pressure.
But so did the tensai, damn it. Whatever Yuushi was gonna do, it was gonna probably be good. Gakuto
was a little thrilled at their playing like this. It was exactly what they needed after how serious
everything else was. At least, he hoped Yuushi was playing.
Yuushi raised one eyebrow, but it was the left one. The one he did when he wasn't really mad, just
playing. With a very straight face and sounding bored like Atobe did, Yuushi said painfully slow, "As
you wish, my prince. Your every wish is my desire. Any requests?"
Gakuto laughed. If he told Yuushi to sing the guy probably woulda. "Yeah, make it good. Make it hot,
and if you can give me another one of those like before that would be great. Bet I wouldn't pass out if
you made me come during too." Gakuto smiled wide at the thought, and then he worried slightly, "Um,
nothin that hurts or too weird, okay Yuushi? And, um...if it's okay, I wanna play with you too either
during or when you're done. And then, um...can we go to sleep like we always do? Cause it's gettin
kinda late, but I still wanna do this first, you know?"
Yuushi's serious face softened to the goofy one. He smiled and nodded, "Okay sweetheart. Nothing that
hurts and it will be your turn next if you would like. Gakuto, what I would like to do we haven't quite
done yet, but it is not anything too weird and I believe you will enjoy it. May I try? Please? If you want
me to stop or switch to something else, just tell me and I will, but...I really do think you will like
it...and it's...it's something I've wanted to try with you for a very, very long time." Yuushi just froze in
place as if he was giving Gakuto time to think it over.
So Gakuto pretended to think because he already knew without any doubts if it really was something
Yuushi really wanted to do, and by the way Yuushi was looking at Gakuto it very much was, Gakuto
eventually was gonna have to try it. Not because he necessarily wanted to or because he was even
being nice, more because Gakuto knew if it was something Yuushi really wanted, the tensai would
figure out a way to get Gakuto to agree. In a lotta ways, Yuushi was very good at bargaining. Mostly
because he had already out-thought whoever it was that was stupid enough to try to pull one over on
the tensai. Gakuto was not dumb, but he wasn't that stupid to think he could fool Yuushi. About the best
he could do was try to get something he wanted in exchange, "So you really think I'll like it? And it's
not too weird and won't hurt? And if I don't like it or say stop, you'll stop? You promise?"
"Yes. I swear to you, sweetheart." Yuushi somehow kept his face serious.
Gakuto couldn't and laughed, "Shut up! Don't think I didn't hear all the other stupid crappy things you
called me either! I was bein nice, but quit it! I'm not a girl! You'd better not say that in front of any of
the guys, Yuushi. I mean it. You ever say that kinda goofy crap in front of another living soul, and I will
never forgive you! I mean it! I'll make you wish you'd never met me, Yuushi."
Yuushi smiled and blushed slightly. Gakuto thought he was making some kind of headway with cutting
out those stupid phrases from the tensai's vocabulary when Yuushi said all dopey, "That will never
happen...Gakuto."
Gakuto could see Yuushi wasn't getting it. He was just gonna say stupid things like that in his head if he
couldn't say them out loud. Which was better than all the guys hearing, but still! Now Gakuto had to
wonder how long Yuushi had been saying his name while silently calling him other things. Gods,
Yuushi was such a dork! Gakuto sighed annoyed but he also couldn't help thinking no one had ever
said things like that to him before. He had to fight the smile off his face when he thought about it. Who
would call him sweetheart? It was ridiculous. And even more stupid because Yuushi had meant every
word he said. Yuushi would only call him sweetheart if he meant he thought not only that Gakuto was a
sweetheart, but that Yuushi thought he had a sweet heart.
Over the years, Gakuto'd been called a lot of things. At school Gakuto had been called everything from
mean to cold to heartless to a bastard to a slut. Usually he didn't mind because Gakuto knew deep down
he was a good person, even if no one ever saw that he was, he knew it. Well, he did and his mom did,
but no one else. His mom told him all the time what a good and big heart he had. How he was a loving
person who deserved the very best and who deserved be loved. Sure, Gakuto sometimes felt like he
was a bad person because of things he said or did, but he tried to do more good than bad. He tried to
right any wrongs he caused. He tried to look out for the underdogs and give everyone a fair shot.
People were jealous of Gakuto because of his social status. He was a sub-reg and that made things
tough for any guy at Hyoutei. Plus, people worried because he had so much information on everyone.
But when they said things or judged him, they didn't know Gakuto. Not really. No one really did.
Except maybe his mom.
And Yuushi.
Stupid Yuushi who called him sweetheart as if it was a natural thing. Yuushi really knew him, even
more than Gakuto's mother did, and Yuushi musta thought that it was true or he wouldn't have said that.
Stupid tensai for making Gakuto feel all good and lovey like this. Damn it, Yuushi had him thinkin like
a stupid girl. So stupid that Gakuto almost said okay without remembering to bargain more.
Yuushi didn't forget though. He musta thought Gakuto thinkin through all that sweetheart crap was
Gakuto hesitating or wanting more before he agreed. "Gakuto," the tensai said, but in a lovey way to let
Gakuto know he was thinking something goofy like sweetheart or darling, "Is there anything I can do
or say to perhaps..." Yuushi kissed him all soft once by the corner of his mouth. "Persuade..." Yuushi
like a whisper brushed his lips across Gakuto's. "You?" Gakuto could feel Yuushi's lips were more
puffy than normal from all their kissing. It felt really hot. Even hotter when Yuushi licked his tongue
between Gakuto's lips, parting them softly and then he pulled back knowing Gakuto wanted a better
kiss than this light, soft teasing.
Gakuto smiled at him in a perfect re-creation of his father when he had a hot sale on the line, "I'm not
sure. How bad do you want it, Yuushi?" He heard the rasp of lust in his own voice, but he didn't care
when he saw the effect his words were having on the tensai. He reached his mouth up like he was
gonna kiss Yuushi, but at the last moment went for the tensai's ear instead. Softly he teased, "How bad
do you wanna do this to me, Yuushi? You can at least tell me that. Help me to help you. How bad?" He
sucked on Yuushi's earlobe to give the tensai a little time to think. He even thought about leaving a little
hickey there because no one but Yuushi would know what it was, but everyone would ask about it.
Gakuto smiled at the wicked thought and whispered, "Just how bad do you want me, Yuushi?"
Yuushi to his surprise gave a low, sexy laugh, "Does 'desperately' sound too needy? Because I've been
told needy is a turn-off."
Gakuto smiled, "Depends. How desperately we talkin? Like you'll make me dinner for a week
desperately? Or we talkin you'll switch and be my lab partner if I let you do whatever it is you wanna
do?"
"Whatever I want?" Yuushi raised both eyebrows in surprise and kinda like in a challenge.
"Maybe..." Gakuto said and then quickly qualified, "I guess...as long as I'll like it and it doesn't hurt."
"And..." Yuushi reminded, "as long as it isn't too weird? Do you trust me, Gakuto?"
"Yeah," Gakuto said with a shrug, "I trust you. Of course I trust you. So...what's it gonna be?"
Yuushi trailed his hand suggestively down Gakuto's chest stopping at a nipple to stroke it to full
hardness, "That all depends on what exactly is being offered. Dinner for a week doesn't qualify me for
whatever I want to do, does it?"
Gakuto had to laugh, "Ha! Not even close, Yuushi. Lab partners. Switch with me. You won't regret it.
You know you wanna. Come on! Tell you what...I'll throw in bein your first also." He turned more to
face Yuushi and looked deep into his eyes. Gakuto teasingly gave Yuushi what was supposed to be his
most wanton and lusty look, but Yuushi was looking at him so intensely and strange it felt weird, but
not in a bad way. Everything got changed up somehow to where for several moments they just kept
looking at each other. For a long time. It wasn't like a staring contest, but it was something Gakuto
never did before and he was feeling a strange tingle in his chest. It wasn't so much a turn-on, although
he was turned on, but this was more like a warmth. That spread everywhere. Like the peaceful warmth
he felt after that orgasm but this was in his chest instead of all over his body. It was strange, but it was
so good. Gakuto wondered if it was from the orgasm, or from Yuushi, or from what, but he felt it would
sound stupid to ask.
Not that Yuushi ever said he thought Gakuto was stupid, but he had seen first-hand several times
Yuushi dumped people for being really dumb. Or saying stupid things. Or asking idiotic questions.
Gakuto didn't want Yuushi to now think maybe he was like that, but he wondered if Yuushi felt it too.
The tensai's hand was on Gakuto's hip. The rounded part of his palm was over Gakuto's hipbone and his
fingers were spread over the hollow Gakuto had there. Yuushi's thumb rubbed softly in a nice way.
Yuushi was looking at him all goofy and lovey, but it was kind of nice. Gakuto started to wonder what
Yuushi was thinking while he looked back at him. Maybe Yuushi was worried. Or scared. He didn't
look like it, but just in case Gakuto said, "I wanna, Yuushi. I wanna be your first. I wanna be with you."
His inside arm was curled up and his hand was touching the middle of Yuushi's chest. He could feel the
tensai's heartbeat. He could measure the rise and fall of Yuushi's every breath. Gakuto's other hand was
resting on Yuushi's big upper arm muscle. It was solid as a rock and sculpted perfectly from hours of
practice.
Yuushi had a tennis tan. Gakuto knew without looking Yuushi's lower arm was suntanned but his
shoulder was a much lighter color. His skin was naturally a little darker than Gakuto's and warm. His
skin always felt warm to the touch as if Yuushi had just been standing out in the sun. On impulse,
Gakuto kissed the hollow at the base of Yuushi's throat. Then he kissed and licked his way up Yuushi's
neck, over his Adams apple and when Gakuto kept going he felt Yuushi moan. His throat vibrated
against Gakuto's lips and felt like Yuushi was growling. Or purring. Yuushi sighed softly, "Gakuto..."
The sound of the tensai's whisper made that warm melty feeling in Gakuto's chest combine with the
turned-on butterflies kinda feeling he usually felt in his belly. Gakuto reached Yuushi's chin and he
pulled back to look at the results of his work. Yuushi looked all goofy and like he was swimming in a
sea of lovey feelings and lust. To try to get something from him now Gakuto felt would be unfair and
just wrong. He smiled having decided, "You don't have to switch lab partners or make me dinner for a
week, Yuushi. I trust you. You can do whatever you want." Silently out of habit Gakuto added and
wished... just please don't hurt me...
"No Gakuto," Yuushi said and went to adjust his glasses which he didn't need and wasn't wearing. He
smiled slightly as if just now getting it was a silly habit he had. "A deal's a deal. Gakuto, I want you to
be my first. I want to be with you. I want to make dinner for you this week. I want to be your lab
partner. And, I want to make love to you now in my own way. I will not hurt you and I will not do
anything too weird. I promise. You can even stop me if you don't like it and I will hold up my end of
the bargain. I swear it. I love you."
"I..." Gakuto went to answer and before he could bite back the shocking word that he went to say
without thinking, he realized it was stuck in his throat and wouldn't come out. He figured it was strange
and lucky at the same time. Instead he said, "I swear it too, okay?" Gakuto grinned before Yuushi could
answer, "You really suck at bargaining, Yuushi. I woulda done it for one dinner if you'da asked all
nice." Thrilled he laughed, "You're really gonna be my lab partner now?"
A slow smile spread across Yuushi's face. It was the same look Yuushi always had when he beat
someone good at chess. Right after they made a fatal mistake. It was the same one he also had when he
figured out an easy way to defeat someone good on the tennis courts, "Yes. I suppose we should wait to
switch until after this week's project so our teacher doesn't object, and please let me handle my current
lab partner. We've had some problems lately..."
"Yeah. I know. He's been cheatin off you. Did you only just notice?" Gakuto rolled his eyes
exasperated, "Why do you think I've been pushin you so hard to switch? Yeah, it'll be fun and yeah, I
hate the crazy one I have now, but I was tryin to help you before the teacher..." Gakuto loved chemistry.
It was something he had never expected to be good at or into, but he just was. It was kinda cool and
interesting. Gakuto really liked it and he was pretty sure Yuushi knew how much he did.
Even though their teacher was not a very good sensei and an idiot because he clearly despised Yuushi,
it had become Gakuto's favorite class. It was one of the reasons Gakuto didn't jump on Yuushi's offer of
lab partners the beginning of the year. Gakuto found it funny how so many of their teachers seemed to
go out of their way to not like Yuushi. And the more they didn't like Yuushi, the harder the tensai went
out of his way to get in their good graces which failed miserably. Eventually, Yuushi turned their hating
him into a joke. The more rude a teacher was to Yuushi, the more sincere and respectful the tensai
appeared. It was comedic genius on Yuushi's part that made the teachers look bad, but Gakuto lately
didn't think it was funny anymore.
Back then it was hilarious. Yuushi seemed so weird and goofy. Gakuto's current lab partner seemed
nice and pretty. She said if he agreed to be her partner she would do all the work. This was back when
Gakuto didn't know how much he would like the class. This was back when he didn't know how much
his turning Yuushi down for the pretty girl musta hurt the tensai. Gakuto wanted to set things right. For
a lot of reasons.
Because now he knew Yuushi woulda been the better choice. The girl was a psycho stalker. She was
way too into Gakuto, and her father was a pharmacist. She knew too much about strange chemistry
stuff, and because of that and a lot of other things she did and said, Gakuto strongly suspected she was
the one who drugged his drink that night.
Sato just happened to conveniently show up. Just more bad luck and crappy choices for Gakuto.
Not for the first time, Gakuto realized he had really awful taste in people. Or maybe he just got
suckered in by someone who seemed all nice because when they met, he thought she was kinda cute.
She wasn't so cute when she so easily got Gakuto more of that drug for Atobe. Of course, she never
knew it was for Atobe. She thought it was for Gakuto and she also thought they together were gonna
use it to have some fun. She had no idea it was for Atobe--just like Gakuto had no idea Atobe was
gonna use it on Shishido. Wheels within wheels. The Hyoutei way. Gakuto learned a lot that day. About
her, about Atobe, about Shishido, but mostly he learned he made a really idiotic series of mistakes by
only seeing the now and not the possible problems the future could hold if you were too stupid and
trusting.
"You...noticed? Oh, you couldn't tell me?" Yuushi frowned and between his eyes this little crease
formed and then relaxed as he probably solved what was buried under the sphinx. Gakuto couldn't have
told him about his lab partner cheating. They had an honor code--laughable as that seemed--but at
Hyoutei it did work. It was just a little warped so everyone could live with it. If Gakuto told Yuushi
then the tensai was honor bound to tell their teacher. If Yuushi knew and didn't report it, he was in
trouble too for 'helping' the jerk who was using him to cheat. Cheating meant expulsion. "How long
ago did you notice?"
Gakuto was surprised and annoyed, "Damn it, Yuushi! You knew? How long did you know? I knew for
sure from the last quiz two weeks ago. I thought he mighta been before then, but I saw him that time do
it with my own eyes. And I didn't tell you because the teacher is one of the ones who is a real bastard to
you. I don't know why you don't stand up to him. He's just jealous of you, you know? But if I'da told
you then he woulda found some way to blame you. He woulda loved that! Genius tensai caught helping
other kid cheat and both expelled. I've been tryin to get you to switch and I was gonna set a trap for
your stupid lab partner when our next quiz happens. Not sure what yet, but I was gonna. Yuushi, you
can't let people do things like that to you or bring you down. You're too trusting!"
Smiling as if Gakuto said something lovey, Yuushi said all moony, "I am?"
"Yeah," Gakuto was really annoyed and thought how to get Yuushi out of this delicately. "Look, I'm
gonna handle our teacher for you. The guy really likes me and he'll let me switch. I'm gonna make it so
I'm asking for the favor for me and you're stuck with me. He'll do it if he thinks you won't like it at all.
And we're not gonna wait until this week's project. I'll get the teacher to give us an extra credit thing or
something..."
Suddenly Gakuto grinned at his wicked inspiration, "Hey! I know! I'll have him give us and them
projects to make up for this week being screwed up with the switch. Your idiot former partner will
cheat off her and she's dyslexic. I know and the teacher knows, but your idiot lab partner won't know.
She gets the right answers but her math is always screwed up on paper! When he copies her stuff, he'll
be busted! It's perfect! And Yuushi?" This was important so Gakuto paused for dramatic effect.
He flopped over to his back and sighed trying to find the right words. Words that wouldn't hurt Yuushi,
"Look, I'm not good with sayin stuff like this so I'm just gonna say it. I like you, okay? I like how damn
smart you are even if it is annoying and even if it screws up the grade curve in every class. Hyoutei's an
escalator school. We're all automatically accepted into Hyoutei high school. There's no reason for you
to dumb yourself down so everyone likes you. And you need to stop bein nice to the teachers thinkin
that if you're nice to them then they'll like you. They aren't gonna like you and it's their own damn loss.
They're idiots and they're jealous of you. Seriously, I know you act stupid all the time and it bugs the
hell outta me."
Gakuto turned his head to look up at Yuushi. He met Yuushi's eyes and said, "Just be yourself. I know
you're the smartest, so be the smartest. I'll still like you. I'll bet that I'll like you even more if you do.
With me by your side no one can touch you here. Not the students and not the teachers. I'm not gonna
let anyone hurt you or make fun of you. Don't be less than who you are and don't take any more crap
from anyone. As a favor to me, will you try it my way and be yourself? 'Be your potential'...?" The last
was said in the tone of their Coach, but it wasn't mocking. Gakuto respected the man too much to make
fun of him in any way despite all the brilliant guy's eccentricities. Some things and some people you
just did not make fun of.
Yuushi stared into his eyes for a long moment. Gakuto wondered if Yuushi felt caught or surprised
because he looked kinda like both. Maybe other people didn't realize just how damn smart Yuushi was,
but Gakuto did. He saw Yuushi make wrong answers on tests and make other mistakes on purpose to
not mess up the class average. Gakuto saw how the teachers smugly made fun of Yuushi to his face
while fake-acting like they liked him. It had to stop. Yuushi was too good for all of that.
When he spoke, Yuushi was quiet and his voice sounded rough, "If that is truly what you want then I
will, but I warn you it will not be easy."
Gakuto began the part he remembered of another one of their Coach's frequent inspirational speeches,
"'Nothing worth having is ever easy and most of the time to get what you want, you are going to have
to fight'..."
Yuushi the brain finished it, "'But when you are done, you will have earned your victory with your own
blood, sweat, and tears which will make it all the more sweet and rewarding. You have been brought
together here and given these chances and opportunities because it is believed you are the best of the
best. Prove it. Show everyone that you are the best. Be your potential.'" Yuushi was quiet for a long
minute and then sighed, "So, do you think anyone else has noticed?"
"That you dumb yourself down?" Gakuto thought and shrugged, "A few of the teachers maybe. And
Atobe probably. But I don't think anyone else. So? You gonna really do it?" Gakuto was a little awed by
the possibilities, but at the same time annoyed by them. Taking the muzzle off that giant brain was like
letting loose his own personal tsunami. You didn't know where the waves would wash but you knew
they were coming and the after-effects would be globally landscape altering. At the same time it kinda
sucked because Gakuto would be one of the people who would have to work harder so that when the
curve was gone his grades wouldn't suffer. Yuushi would just have to help him if he started to fall
behind, because Yuushi deserved to be his best self. Everyone did.
Gakuto had a feeling this was a very good and important thing he was doing for Yuushi. Very good,
important, and loving. The kind of thing someone with a sweet heart would do for someone they really
cared about.
The tensai's hand was on Gakuto's cheek. His thumb was tracing the contours of Gakuto's cheekbone
where it once upon a time was cracked and broken. In a very off-handed way Yuushi said, "Yes, for you
I'll be my best self. You're worth it." Yuushi smiled slightly as if thinking some silly tensai pun to
himself in his head. The pad of his thumb traced around Gakuto's lips and then his thumb crossed over
the center of them, parting them slightly in the middle and slipping into Gakuto's mouth. Gakuto
sucked on it teasingly because he could. He enjoyed watching that hot turned-on look return to Yuushi's
eyes as Gakuto flicked his tongue around between sucks. Gakuto liked watching with Yuushi.
Everything was totally different with the tensai.
Usually Gakuto watched out of a need to protect himself from Sato's wrath or to know how much
longer he was gonna have to endure some idiot's hands all over him before he was free to go. With
Yuushi, Gakuto watched because it was...enjoyable. It was fun turning him on. It was pleasurable to
make Yuushi feel good and that was new.
So was the other reason Gakuto watched Yuushi. He watched to make sure Yuushi was okay with what
was going on. It was Gakuto's own way of caring about him. With whatever Yuushi had been through
and even though he had done lots of sex stuff, in a lotta ways, Yuushi was innocent. Innocent and naive
and even though he seemed okay, Gakuto knew from experience Yuushi really wasn't as okay as he
seemed. Sex was weird like that. It felt good and at times like this fooling around was fun and all, but
you never knew when something might make you suddenly feel worried or scared. Yuushi took very
good care of him and it was the least Gakuto could do to do the same for the tensai.
He smiled around Yuushi's thumb thinking about how good Yuushi took care of him. How good Yuushi
made him feel. Gakuto thought to himself if this was as real as Yuushi was makin things feel, then
whatever was going on with them was very good. It suddenly made sense to Gakuto that feeling like
this about someone and having them feel this back for you was the reason all the fangirls went crazy
and why people cried so bad when things ended and you broke up. Gakuto always maintained that love
and everything about it sucked. All the times people came to Gakuto insane with jealousy and longing
left him feeling jaded. All those people who were desperate and willing to pay whatever price just for a
scrap of information on the person they loved left him feeling ill. He held too many hands while
someone cried bitterly over love lost. Gakuto just never saw the point of love before.
But as he watched Yuushi looking at him so adoringly while he was just doing something as stupid as
sucking the tensai's thumb, Gakuto suddenly understood the rest of it. It was like everyone else
understanding a joke, but Gakuto not getting the point until just now. Or like everyone read a book on
love and said how wonderful it was, but all Gakuto saw before now was a bunch of miserable and
hurting people and what the hell was so wonderful about that?
This though, this feeling between him and Yuushi, how things were, all of this was wonderful. It was
like that unbelievable orgasm earlier. He never saw it coming but he wanted more and more. Gakuto
knew without even thinking about it--he was hooked on these feelings. He wanted more and more of
them. He never wanted it to stop and he wanted Yuushi to feel this incredibly good feeling too.
It occurred to Gakuto for the first time this is why people make themselves so unhappy and crazy over
love. They have a small piece of this feeling between him and Yuushi and they get hooked. Most of the
time though, Gakuto knew the people who came to him desperate for info and crying, they were in love
alone. The other person sometimes wasn't even aware of them or interested in them so Gakuto always
thought they kinda broke their own hearts.
It never made sense to him before, but now that he was here and feeling this, it was all clear. Normally,
all this lovey stuff woulda scared the hell outta him. The difference now was because these feelings
were with Yuushi. Gakuto was pretty sure Yuushi was feeling the same things, so Gakuto felt guarded
but at the same time he realized he felt--safe. Maybe because this felt too good to worry. Yeah, they had
a lot of bad stuff that happened to each of them, but Gakuto felt good about things. He felt high and
happy and hopeful. It was crazy. It was ridiculous. It was wonderful. He felt hopeful together they
could get over all the bad stuff. Together. And he would bet anything that Yuushi felt the same. Maybe
that was the secret of love. That you both had to feel it. And maybe both had to want it.
Gakuto didn't know. He wasn't even a hundred percent positive that was exactly how he was feeling
because he never felt anything like this before. It was wonderful and scary both at the same time and
because he knew Yuushi took such good care of him, he decided to take a chance. "Before you do what
you wanna do to me, will you do me a favor? Please?" Gakuto added the please so Yuushi knew he was
serious.
He wasn't joking around about this.