Prince Of Tennis Fan Fiction ❯ Passionate ❯ Chapter 2 ( Chapter 2 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: RyuuAngel 
Anime/Manga: Prince Of Tennis Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy / Hentai / Romance | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 11.21.2009 | Pages: 4 | Words: 5.2K | Visits: 625 | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: Prince Of Tennis Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy / Hentai / Romance | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 11.21.2009 | Pages: 4 | Words: 5.2K | Visits: 625 | Status: Work In Progress
My dream wasn't one of those hard ones to figure out.
I was on the court, playing doubles with Fuji. Our opponents were nameless, faceless, but known all the same. They were everyone we would ever play, our oponents, our teammates. Everyone. What everyone seemed to think should have been an easy win for Fuji and I was the most difficult game I'd ever played, and not because of the strength of the faceless players across the court. It was because Fuji and I couldn't stop looking at each other. We'd miss easy volleys because the ball would come my way, but I'd been too busy staring at Fuji, watching the way he moved, to notice. Fuji wasn't playing at all.
"I'll leave everything to you, Echizen." His voice caressed my ears like an intimate whisper even though we were yards apart. "I'm counting on you."
The shriek of the alarm clock broke me from the dream and I fumbled for it, finally slamming it into silence without opening my eyes. I cuddled back up in bed and tried to go back to sleep. Hazy thoughts started to drag sluggishly through my mind and I tried to fight them off, but to no avail. My dream, instead of fading and losing its grasp on my mind, instead had me thinking.
"I'm counting on you."
I rolled over onto my back in the bed, eyes snapping wide open, and then winced when my body started to complain a bit.
Okay, so I was obviously a bit worried about what happened with Fuji in the locker room last night affecting my tennis. That seemed pretty obvious. I pondered why in my dream Fuji wouldn't be playing. Could it be that I was worried Fuji wouldn't challenge me on the courts anymore? No, I didn't think that was all of it, maybe part of it, but not all. I reached up to rub my sleep-weary eyes and paused in mid-motion.
"I'm counting on you."
I cringed and stared at the ceiling. Did I not want that kind of responsibility? Could it be, with all of my confidense, I was really afraid of letting them down? Well, not them. Was I afraid of letting that damn Fuji down? This was Tezuka's fault too, with all of his talk about becoming a 'pillar of support' for the team, for Seigaku. I didn't want to be a pillar for anyone. I just wanted to beat my god-damned father! Couldn't they see that the team didnt really matter to me, that all I wanted was to learn and strengthen myself? If it was true that I didnt care, then how could it be true that I was afraid of letting them all down?
The thought irritated me enough to make me tumble out of bed (groaning and wincing the whole time) and stagger over to my bureau to pick out clothes for the day. The pitter patter of rain made me check out the window and I sighed, a little let down by the weather. It was probably best that practice would be put off until either this afternoon or tomorrow since I was having a little trouble walking normally, but thinking this only made me more aggravated. I wasn't delicate, and I would play tennis today, even if it was raining.
That decided, I shambled over to the bathroom and turned the water on. I put my clothes on the sink edge and caught a glimpse of my reflection, making me do a double-take. My right cheek was pretty bruised up, and when I ran my fingers over it, I winced, because the skin was a little scraped too.
The memory hit me hard enough that I grabbed the sink edge in a death grip to stay upright.
I felt pleasure so intense I was numb with it, but before it could explode, Fuji yanked his fingers from inside of me.
"Not yet, not yet, not yet." Fuji was saying under his breath, and he turned me roughly around to plaster me against the wall. My face hurt, because the move hadn't been gentle in the least. I fought to breathe, to think, a hand pressed against my shoulder to hold me where I was-
Shaking off the memory was all kinds of difficult, and even when my mind was mostly free of it, my body wasn't. I did my best to ignore the throbbing between my legs and frowned at my reflection. Now that I was remembering and looking for it, I could see small scrapes all over my chest, nothing serious, but things that might be noticed in a lockerroom with a bunch of concerned friends. I swore under my breath and tried to think of something to explain it away. Nothing good came to mind immediately and I sighed and climbed (carefully, my breath hissing between my teeth like Kaidoh was so fond of doing) into the tub.
The shower water pounding down on me started out being soothing, and ended up provoking more memories.
“You’re going to bloody your lip.” Fuji touched my lower lip gently where my teeth had dug into it, and I bit him. I bit him to show him that this wasn’t going to be easy, and I bit him because I wanted to sink my teeth into something. There was a sharp intake of breath near my ear, a thrust against my ass, and his hand convulsed around my cock, all at the same time. I bit down harder, by accident this time in reaction to his reaction, and Fuji made a small pain sound, his hand tightening on me again. It was an endless circle of reaction until I finally unstuck my teeth, moaning-
I'd actually moaned aloud, because my traitor hand had started to recreate the memory of Fuji's hand on me, and though it wasn't as good, it was still amazing. Once started, it was like breaking a dam and I couldn't stop. I moaned and thrust into my hand and eventually came all over the shower wall.
Ashamed, I cleaned up my mess and launched myself from the shower. Every motion was a little bit jerky, angry, and when I tried to dry certain places like that and they reminded me with a rush of pain that I shouldn't do that, I took a long, slow, deep breath. I let the anger out on that breath and felt just a tiny bit better. It was enough that I didnt have any more issues getting ready, though I was still ready for school in record time. I actually got to eat breakfast that morning.
"Ryouma?" A hand waved in front of my face and I realized that as I was eating, I'd been spacing out. Thinking about he-who-must-not-be-named. (And no, it's not Voldemort.)
"Sorry Nanako, what was that?" I said, and I sounded tired and annoyed even to me. Nanako looked like she wanted to reprove me, but instead just gave me an assessing look and repeated herself.
"I asked you if you wanted a ride to school since it's raining."
I blew out a breath, making my dark bangs scatter away from my eyes. "Ah, thanks." I finally said, and finished up my cereal. We left shortly after, and just when I thought I was in the clear from any questions, Nanako spoke up.
"Hey, Ryouma-kun, is something wrong?" She asked gently, pulling to a stop in front of the school. I slipped from the car and turned back to look at her.
"No." I slammed the door shut and stared at her through the open passenger window. "See you later," and walked away. I didn't turn and look, but I could feel her eyes burning holes into my back. Instead I sauntered into school just like any other day, except this wasn't any other day, and something big had changed. Irrevocably.
~*~
School was moving so slowly that I thought I was going to scream. Nobody was acting differently, and I still had to do all the same old things, but everything looked different. The world felt like it had tipped slightly on its axis rotation. I felt like everybody else should have seen it too, and when they didnt, I couldnt help but be a bit annoyed with them. The English teacher made another mistake with possessive pronouns, and instead of pointing it out and giving him a hard time like I normally did, I just strolled up, fixed the sentence, and then went back to my desk to brood without a word. The teacher, looking a bit flustered, checked my change against his English book, checked again, flushed harder, and left it be. By now everyone was so used to me correcting the teacher that they thought nothing out of the ordinary.
Except the English teacher, who kept giving me serruptitous curious glances that I pretended not to see.
Finally lunch rolled around and I shuffled down the hall towards the cafeteria, wishing quite sincerely that it wasn't downpouring so I could go up on the roof by myself. I'd had brief thoughts about not eating at all, but my stomach and pride had both made themselves known, and now trepidation was eating through me. I allowed myself to draw the short walk out, going along at a pace that only barely hurt.
"Looking a little sore there, Ryouma-kun." A familiar voice breathed across my ear and I nearly stumbed in surprise, my whole body tightening in shock for a moment. Fuji was looking rather pleased by my reaction, and I glared up at him.
"It's your fault." I accused, and Fuji leaned down, a hand on my shoulder keeping me still when I started to lean away.
"I seem to remember a certain someone begging me not to stop when I tried to go easy on him." Fuji said lowly in my ear, and the cruelty of the remark was not lost on me, nor was my shame as the memory washed over me.
"Don't stop. Please don't stop!"
I cringed at the memory of my own voice and yanked away from the other boy, wishing I had my favorite hat to pull over my burning face right about now. I even went as far as to reach for it before I remembered it wasnt there and let my hand drop to my side. I didn't have any way to respond to him, so I just turned away and tried to hurry as much as I could without limping to the cafeteria. Fuji kept up with me pretty easily and when we almost within earshot of the others (who had somehow already gotten there and were seated, eating and bantering) Fuji's face lit up with what I could only presume was something I wouldn't like.
"Wouldn't you say it's about time I told the other regulars just how brazen and shameless our sweet, dispassionate ochibi can be?" Fuji's expression was pure, sarcastic evil.
"You wouldn't dare." I growled out, and Fuji just grinned at me and went to the lunch table. After a brief, frozen moment, and unstuck my limbs and hurried over, because Fuji Syusuke definitely would dare. The only open seat was directly across from the prodigy tennis player, but that was fine by me. It would be easier to lung across the table and choke him if he started spouting off about something stupid.
Eiji was suddenly on top of me. I hadn't even seen him coming. His arms were wrapped tightly around me and his cheek was pressed against my unhurt one.
"Ochiiibiii!" Eiji drew out both syllables like I'd offended him. "Where did you ge those bruises, Ochibi?" He asked loudly and inquisitively. I dared a glance at Fuji and found him regarding me with his usual expression.
"Yes, Echizen, how did you get those bruises?" Fuji asked, sounding pleasant and normal enough, his hand cupping his face and his elbow taking that weight where it was braced on the tabe. I knew he was waiting to hear what I would say, challenging me.
"Fell down playing tennis." I muttered, and nearly leapt out of my seat when I felt a sock-sovered toe snake up my calf under the edge of my pant leg. I glared at Fuji, but he kept up his pleasant expression in place like his toe wasn't drawing lazy circles around my ankle-bone.
"Echizen, did you keep on playing after dark last night?" Oishi asked disprovingly.
"That's our Echizen." Momo cut in, grinning his big, stupid grin. "Always focused on tennis."
"We have outdoor lights at home." I said, somewhat defensively, glad I didnt have to lie about that at least. Fuji's toe somehow managed to glide up to the back of my knee and I yanked back, wincing at the sudden movement.
"Oi, oi, warn someone when you're going to move quickly." Eiji complained, rubbing his bruised arm where I'd accidentally hit him with my quick movement.
"It's not my fault you were hanging all over me." I said, knew it sounded cruel, and didn't care.
"Ochibiiii!" I pointedly ignored him and the redhead went into a pout, glaring at me. Fuji was giving me a strange expression now, but at least he was keeping his feet to himself.
The rest of lunch went strangely as it usually did, with the exception of some stray glances Fuji and I shared. No one seemed to notice though, and when the warning bell rang for the next period, I packed up and left unaccosted. Well, mostly unaccosted, if you didn't count Momo putting me in a headlock to pick on me about how much I was devoted to my chosen sport. I got into the next class and even through the rest of the day without seeing Fuji, and was just a little surprised... and disappointed. It was hard to admit to myself, but it seemed I had expected Fuji to go to extra lengths to tease me, and it was a strange kind of let down to find the older boy nowhere in sight. Perhaps he'd taken the hint and decided teasing me wasnt worth it? Or maybe Fuji was just tired of me already and was moving on to a new victim to manipulate. Was I really so boring?
Did it matter?
Of course not.
~*~
"Oi, Echizen, what are you doing here?"
I ducked my head and retied my shoes to avoid looking up and answering Momoshiro. But Momo was persistent, and he waited me out. I sighed and sat up to give him an irritated look.
"None of your business." I got my racquet out of the bag and exited the locker room, looking for quiet corner. It was not to be, though.
"It's still raining, dummy. You can't practice in this." Momo was following after me out into the light drizzle. I tugged my spare hat down to keep the rain out of my eyes and was glad I'd thought to keep this hat in my tennis locker. Momo, on the other hand, was getting soaked. His normally gel-spiked hair was losing its battle with the rain and plastering against his head.
"Go home." I told the other boy, and kept walking, my racquet balanced up on my shoulder, my left hand already around one of the balls in my pants pocket. Momo seemed intent on ignoring me and getting himself soaked, because he kept following me. I shrugged and stopped at a convenient peice of wall. It was his funeral if he wanted to sit out here with me and catch a cold. The ball in my hand was pulled from my a pocket and after a few bounces to get the feel of the damp ball, I tossed it gently up and smacked it lightly against the wall.
Pain lanced casually through my lower body, but it was bearable, and I grit my teeth and focused on hitting the ball gently to the same exact spot. When I was doing that with absolute consistency, I changed the angle slightly so the ball came back on my right, forcing me to hit it with a backhand. It came back just to my left, just as I planned it, and I sent it back to the wall in a forehand hit. The backhand hit was a little more painful than the forehand, but still bearable, so I upped the power, forcing myself to react faster and with more precision to disallow the ball getting by me, continuing to alternate sides with each hit.
The pain was a general ache now, and after a few of these fast, hard hits I had to stop, catching the ball on my racquet and huffing. It wasn't that I was really that exerted, so much as I hadnt remebered to breath well through the pain. But it had been bearable, and yeah I wouldnt be at the top of my game today, but so long as I didnt make it worse, I would be back to normal in a few days. Maybe even tomorrow. I bounced the ball absently on the edge of my racquet as I was thinking, still turned towards the wall, and jumped hard enough to lose my timing and drop the ball when Momo spoke. I had forgotten he was there.
"Did you really just fall playing tennis, Ryouma?" His tone implied that he knew I was making stuff up, but I certainly wasnt about to tell Momo that Fuji had butt-fucked me so hard that I could barely walk today. Nope, that one was staying just between me and Fuji.
"Ah." I answered affirmatively, and then headed back to the locker-room, unsurprised when Momo fell in step next to me.
"Come on Echizen, you don't really expect me to believe that, do you?"
I ignored him (I'd had lots of practice), but Momo'd had practice too.
"Did you get into an accident? Pull a muscle?"
I continued to ignore him and Momo continued to pester me.
"Did you try to beat somebody up? Ah, no, thats not you. Did someone beat you up for showing them up?"
Okay, I had to admit, that one was possible, and I felt my lips twitch towards a smile. Momo, seeing this, rallied.
"Hmm... From the way you're moving it looks like its your lower back." He went on, and now I was a bit uneasy. Was it so obvious? "You overdid it, didn't you?" Momo smirked playfully. "I'll bet you were enjoying yourself with one of your many fangirl's, weren't you?" He was really getting into it now. "Or maybe one of these perverted guys around here just couldn't stay away from your young body anymore? Was that it, Echizen?" He was grinning widely.
Even though I knew Momo was just picking on me, I blanched slightly. I'd never thought that he'd hit upon the truth in his musings.
Momo saw my reaction and his eyes widened. "That's not-"
I cut in. "What perverted guys?" I tried to sound a bit outraged. I was trying to divert his attention, because I didnt want him to think he was right. I couldn't have Momo find out. He'd think it had been forced on me, and then he'd tell the others to try and find out who did it... and if he thought it was my choice, well, then he'd react even worse, wouldnt he? I could almost envision the disgust on his face.
"They're around." Momo said vaguely, obviously troubled. He'd also avoided answering the question, which meant he either had thought I had already known and didnt want to be the one to tell me, or I didnt know them. I was betting on the former. "Echizen, about-"
"What guys?" I interrupted again, and now Momo was definitely distracted. We entered the locker room and I turned to glare at the older boy, hoping to force the words out of him. Finally he sighed and I knew I had won.
"Listen, you didnt hear this from me, okay? But I think you're old enough to know these things..." He trailed off, looking distinctly uncomfortable, and sat down on one of the benches. I stayed standing. "You know how Eiji is always so cuddly with all of us?" I nodded. "Well, uh, he's... he's gay. And most of us think Oishi is too."
I dropped onto the bench next to him, quite stunned, but Momo wasn't finished.
"Fuji and Kawamura have both been known to have interests in boys and girls. And I don't know about Inui, Kaidoh or Tezuka. They don't share."
I closed my mouth, wet my lips, and asked the question on my mind at the moment. "What about you?"
Momo flushed. "I like girl's of course!" His tone implied that he was slightly outraged I'd even asked. Finding my world slowly being righted, I managed a grin.
"Just checking."
He grumbled under his breath for a minute before his expression went back to being inquisitive as I got up and started changing to go home.
"Hey Echizen..."
I didn't pause but kept on with what I was doing, my back to the other tennis player. "Yeah?"
"Does it bother you to know you will have to change in here with boys who find your body attractive?" He mumbled it, and I realized Momo was ever so slightly bothered by this question himself. I waited until my clothes were settled on my body and my bag was packed before I answered. I turned towards the door and as I was going by him, I spoke.
"Who am I to complain about it?"
Who, indeed?
~*~
When I got home, Nanako and my father were both quite ready to jump on me about not telling them I was staying at school a little late, but luckily, the phone rang. Nanjiroh picked the phone up and spoke for a few moments before laughing and covering the mouthpeice with his hand. I had been about to make my escape into my room when his voice stopped me.
"Hey, Ryouma, one of your friends was wondering if you're free for a date this evening." The expression on his face said he was enjoying the word 'date' way too much. I should have just said no, but curiosity won out before I could think it through well.
"Who is it?" I couldn't imagine Ryuzaki's granddaughter (what was her name again?) having enough courage to do it. Maybe it was that other girl who was always with her, the one who always cheered so exuberantly-
"Fuji, I think he said. Fuji Syusuke." My father was still grinning at me.
I felt all the blood drain from my face. How had I not expected something like this? I didn't trust my dad to relay the message properly, so I snatched the phone out of his hand to a surprised "Hey!" and brought it to my ear.
"Fuji." I was in control, and my voice was deadpan.
"Saa." The phone told me in Fuji's pleasant tones.
"Don't call here again." I hung up.
The phone started to ring almost immediately and by reflex I picked it up and then let it drop back in the cradle to the astonished stares of my father and my cousin.
"Ryouma, that's so impolite!"
"Boy, why are you hanging up on your friend?"
I ignored them both and started to turn away, but the phone rang again. My father lunged for it, but I was closer, and I got it first, but then had to fight to keep it, battling quick, tennis-reflexive hands. Finally I got the phone dropped back in the cradle and we both froze, waiting to see if it would ring again. My hand was on the phone, my father hovering over me, and for a full count of twenty nothing happened. Then quite suddenly another ring split the air. I picked up the phone and brought it to my ear, ready to end this stupid game now. I didnt say anything for a second and a tentative voice reached my ears.
"Echizen? If you're there, please just lis-"
I didn't let Fuji finish. "That's enough, Fuji. I'm not playing whatever demented game you are. Tell whoever whatever you want, I dont care. Just don't bother me. Stop calling me. I'm through with this." I was clear, concise, firm. I would not play into Fuji's hands. If he had no hold on me, he couldnt blackmail me, and he couldnt tease me anymore. I was not a toy for him to play with.
"Demented game?" Fuji finally said, and he didnt sound amused. I couldnt tell over the phone what was in his voice. It sounded empty. Could it be I had hurt Fuji's feelings?
Not my problem.
"That's what I said."
I realized Nanako and Nanjiroh were staring at me open-mouthed and I turned my back on them, wondering if they had any idea what was going on.
"You think I'm using you for amusement." Fuji said carefully.
"I know you are."
Again there was a long pause. I stayed absolutely still, because more than anything, I wanted to fidget. No, no, more than anything, I wanted to be up in my room where I could think.
"I've got homework. See you at practice tomorrow." I said finally.
This time when I hung up I didnt wait to see if the phone would ring again, because I was almost a hundred percent sure it wouldnt. And as I hung up my coat and unpacked my bag's clothes to be washed, there was only silence. I left the wet, dirty clothes on the pantry floor for someone to wash and made my way up to my room to the same silence.
It was beautiful.
~*~
A knock disturbed my peace. "Boy, I'm coming in."
I was relaxing quite comfortably on my bed with my cat curled up on my stomach as my father entered the room. He sat on the end of my bed (my eyes were closed, but I felt it well enough) and stayed silent for so long my eyebrow started to twitch in annoyance.
"Is there a reason you're here?" I asked finally, and felt the bed shift slightly.
"What's going on with you and that Fuji guy, Ryouma?"
I felt my face scrunching into a frown. "None of your business."
"Come on, boy of mine. Why were you so mean to him?"
The words popped out of me before I could stop them. "Because he's a sadistic bastard."
A short, charged silence followed. When I peeked open one eye, my father looked distinctly uncomfortable. Karupin shifted slightly but otherwise didnt react to the tension levels in the room.
"Ryouma, your not, I mean, that is..." I let him fumble because I didnt want to help him. It was easier to let him dig his own hole. "You aren't sexually active, are you?"
Shit. I hadnt thought my dad was that perceptive. Also, I thought if anything he'd get so stuck on the two boys thing that he'd never make it past that. "No." I lied pretty easily.
"If you were, or are, it's okay, really. You're a little young... Younger than I had been! But so long as you're being careful about it-"
"No!"
He hesitated and plowed ahead. "This Fuji guy... he isnt making you do anything you dont want to, is he?" And now my dad sounded more serious than I'd ever heard him. It was strange. I considered saying many things, from: "Oh no, I wanted to" to "What about the fact that's he's a he" and finally decided simplicity was the best course.
"No."
I was the Prince of Negative Ambiguous Answers today.
My father blew out a breath and stood up from the bed, looking older than I'd ever seen him look. Maybe it was the seriousness on his face. I dont think I'd ever seen him like that.
"Listen, if you ever need to talk, about any of this, just tell me. I know I'm not very reliable sometimes, but in this, I can be as serious as you need me to be. I won't judge you." And now he looked slightly pained, but it was his usual expression, not real pain. "To think a son of mine might be more interested in boys than girls." He shook his head, grinning at me. "Maybe if I gave you some of my magazines you'd change your mind-"
I threw the closest thing at hand at him (which, low and behold, was a tennis ball) and he ducked out of the room, shutting the door behind him and leaving me with the echo of his laughter. Karupin had finally been unsettled when I had moved, and he meowed angrily at me and resettled himself. I stayed staring at the door for quite a while, thinking over what my father had said, and finally a small smile touched the edges of my mouth, almost unwillingly.
A stray thought wiped the smile off of my face like it had never been there.
Everyone around me seemed to be okay with the idea of someone close to them being gay, myself included there, but I hadnt even considered how I felt personally about possibly finding other boys attractive.
The thought flung me back on the bed to do some more brooding.
Like I hadn't done enough of that today.
I was on the court, playing doubles with Fuji. Our opponents were nameless, faceless, but known all the same. They were everyone we would ever play, our oponents, our teammates. Everyone. What everyone seemed to think should have been an easy win for Fuji and I was the most difficult game I'd ever played, and not because of the strength of the faceless players across the court. It was because Fuji and I couldn't stop looking at each other. We'd miss easy volleys because the ball would come my way, but I'd been too busy staring at Fuji, watching the way he moved, to notice. Fuji wasn't playing at all.
"I'll leave everything to you, Echizen." His voice caressed my ears like an intimate whisper even though we were yards apart. "I'm counting on you."
The shriek of the alarm clock broke me from the dream and I fumbled for it, finally slamming it into silence without opening my eyes. I cuddled back up in bed and tried to go back to sleep. Hazy thoughts started to drag sluggishly through my mind and I tried to fight them off, but to no avail. My dream, instead of fading and losing its grasp on my mind, instead had me thinking.
"I'm counting on you."
I rolled over onto my back in the bed, eyes snapping wide open, and then winced when my body started to complain a bit.
Okay, so I was obviously a bit worried about what happened with Fuji in the locker room last night affecting my tennis. That seemed pretty obvious. I pondered why in my dream Fuji wouldn't be playing. Could it be that I was worried Fuji wouldn't challenge me on the courts anymore? No, I didn't think that was all of it, maybe part of it, but not all. I reached up to rub my sleep-weary eyes and paused in mid-motion.
"I'm counting on you."
I cringed and stared at the ceiling. Did I not want that kind of responsibility? Could it be, with all of my confidense, I was really afraid of letting them down? Well, not them. Was I afraid of letting that damn Fuji down? This was Tezuka's fault too, with all of his talk about becoming a 'pillar of support' for the team, for Seigaku. I didn't want to be a pillar for anyone. I just wanted to beat my god-damned father! Couldn't they see that the team didnt really matter to me, that all I wanted was to learn and strengthen myself? If it was true that I didnt care, then how could it be true that I was afraid of letting them all down?
The thought irritated me enough to make me tumble out of bed (groaning and wincing the whole time) and stagger over to my bureau to pick out clothes for the day. The pitter patter of rain made me check out the window and I sighed, a little let down by the weather. It was probably best that practice would be put off until either this afternoon or tomorrow since I was having a little trouble walking normally, but thinking this only made me more aggravated. I wasn't delicate, and I would play tennis today, even if it was raining.
That decided, I shambled over to the bathroom and turned the water on. I put my clothes on the sink edge and caught a glimpse of my reflection, making me do a double-take. My right cheek was pretty bruised up, and when I ran my fingers over it, I winced, because the skin was a little scraped too.
The memory hit me hard enough that I grabbed the sink edge in a death grip to stay upright.
I felt pleasure so intense I was numb with it, but before it could explode, Fuji yanked his fingers from inside of me.
"Not yet, not yet, not yet." Fuji was saying under his breath, and he turned me roughly around to plaster me against the wall. My face hurt, because the move hadn't been gentle in the least. I fought to breathe, to think, a hand pressed against my shoulder to hold me where I was-
Shaking off the memory was all kinds of difficult, and even when my mind was mostly free of it, my body wasn't. I did my best to ignore the throbbing between my legs and frowned at my reflection. Now that I was remembering and looking for it, I could see small scrapes all over my chest, nothing serious, but things that might be noticed in a lockerroom with a bunch of concerned friends. I swore under my breath and tried to think of something to explain it away. Nothing good came to mind immediately and I sighed and climbed (carefully, my breath hissing between my teeth like Kaidoh was so fond of doing) into the tub.
The shower water pounding down on me started out being soothing, and ended up provoking more memories.
“You’re going to bloody your lip.” Fuji touched my lower lip gently where my teeth had dug into it, and I bit him. I bit him to show him that this wasn’t going to be easy, and I bit him because I wanted to sink my teeth into something. There was a sharp intake of breath near my ear, a thrust against my ass, and his hand convulsed around my cock, all at the same time. I bit down harder, by accident this time in reaction to his reaction, and Fuji made a small pain sound, his hand tightening on me again. It was an endless circle of reaction until I finally unstuck my teeth, moaning-
I'd actually moaned aloud, because my traitor hand had started to recreate the memory of Fuji's hand on me, and though it wasn't as good, it was still amazing. Once started, it was like breaking a dam and I couldn't stop. I moaned and thrust into my hand and eventually came all over the shower wall.
Ashamed, I cleaned up my mess and launched myself from the shower. Every motion was a little bit jerky, angry, and when I tried to dry certain places like that and they reminded me with a rush of pain that I shouldn't do that, I took a long, slow, deep breath. I let the anger out on that breath and felt just a tiny bit better. It was enough that I didnt have any more issues getting ready, though I was still ready for school in record time. I actually got to eat breakfast that morning.
"Ryouma?" A hand waved in front of my face and I realized that as I was eating, I'd been spacing out. Thinking about he-who-must-not-be-named. (And no, it's not Voldemort.)
"Sorry Nanako, what was that?" I said, and I sounded tired and annoyed even to me. Nanako looked like she wanted to reprove me, but instead just gave me an assessing look and repeated herself.
"I asked you if you wanted a ride to school since it's raining."
I blew out a breath, making my dark bangs scatter away from my eyes. "Ah, thanks." I finally said, and finished up my cereal. We left shortly after, and just when I thought I was in the clear from any questions, Nanako spoke up.
"Hey, Ryouma-kun, is something wrong?" She asked gently, pulling to a stop in front of the school. I slipped from the car and turned back to look at her.
"No." I slammed the door shut and stared at her through the open passenger window. "See you later," and walked away. I didn't turn and look, but I could feel her eyes burning holes into my back. Instead I sauntered into school just like any other day, except this wasn't any other day, and something big had changed. Irrevocably.
~*~
School was moving so slowly that I thought I was going to scream. Nobody was acting differently, and I still had to do all the same old things, but everything looked different. The world felt like it had tipped slightly on its axis rotation. I felt like everybody else should have seen it too, and when they didnt, I couldnt help but be a bit annoyed with them. The English teacher made another mistake with possessive pronouns, and instead of pointing it out and giving him a hard time like I normally did, I just strolled up, fixed the sentence, and then went back to my desk to brood without a word. The teacher, looking a bit flustered, checked my change against his English book, checked again, flushed harder, and left it be. By now everyone was so used to me correcting the teacher that they thought nothing out of the ordinary.
Except the English teacher, who kept giving me serruptitous curious glances that I pretended not to see.
Finally lunch rolled around and I shuffled down the hall towards the cafeteria, wishing quite sincerely that it wasn't downpouring so I could go up on the roof by myself. I'd had brief thoughts about not eating at all, but my stomach and pride had both made themselves known, and now trepidation was eating through me. I allowed myself to draw the short walk out, going along at a pace that only barely hurt.
"Looking a little sore there, Ryouma-kun." A familiar voice breathed across my ear and I nearly stumbed in surprise, my whole body tightening in shock for a moment. Fuji was looking rather pleased by my reaction, and I glared up at him.
"It's your fault." I accused, and Fuji leaned down, a hand on my shoulder keeping me still when I started to lean away.
"I seem to remember a certain someone begging me not to stop when I tried to go easy on him." Fuji said lowly in my ear, and the cruelty of the remark was not lost on me, nor was my shame as the memory washed over me.
"Don't stop. Please don't stop!"
I cringed at the memory of my own voice and yanked away from the other boy, wishing I had my favorite hat to pull over my burning face right about now. I even went as far as to reach for it before I remembered it wasnt there and let my hand drop to my side. I didn't have any way to respond to him, so I just turned away and tried to hurry as much as I could without limping to the cafeteria. Fuji kept up with me pretty easily and when we almost within earshot of the others (who had somehow already gotten there and were seated, eating and bantering) Fuji's face lit up with what I could only presume was something I wouldn't like.
"Wouldn't you say it's about time I told the other regulars just how brazen and shameless our sweet, dispassionate ochibi can be?" Fuji's expression was pure, sarcastic evil.
"You wouldn't dare." I growled out, and Fuji just grinned at me and went to the lunch table. After a brief, frozen moment, and unstuck my limbs and hurried over, because Fuji Syusuke definitely would dare. The only open seat was directly across from the prodigy tennis player, but that was fine by me. It would be easier to lung across the table and choke him if he started spouting off about something stupid.
Eiji was suddenly on top of me. I hadn't even seen him coming. His arms were wrapped tightly around me and his cheek was pressed against my unhurt one.
"Ochiiibiii!" Eiji drew out both syllables like I'd offended him. "Where did you ge those bruises, Ochibi?" He asked loudly and inquisitively. I dared a glance at Fuji and found him regarding me with his usual expression.
"Yes, Echizen, how did you get those bruises?" Fuji asked, sounding pleasant and normal enough, his hand cupping his face and his elbow taking that weight where it was braced on the tabe. I knew he was waiting to hear what I would say, challenging me.
"Fell down playing tennis." I muttered, and nearly leapt out of my seat when I felt a sock-sovered toe snake up my calf under the edge of my pant leg. I glared at Fuji, but he kept up his pleasant expression in place like his toe wasn't drawing lazy circles around my ankle-bone.
"Echizen, did you keep on playing after dark last night?" Oishi asked disprovingly.
"That's our Echizen." Momo cut in, grinning his big, stupid grin. "Always focused on tennis."
"We have outdoor lights at home." I said, somewhat defensively, glad I didnt have to lie about that at least. Fuji's toe somehow managed to glide up to the back of my knee and I yanked back, wincing at the sudden movement.
"Oi, oi, warn someone when you're going to move quickly." Eiji complained, rubbing his bruised arm where I'd accidentally hit him with my quick movement.
"It's not my fault you were hanging all over me." I said, knew it sounded cruel, and didn't care.
"Ochibiiii!" I pointedly ignored him and the redhead went into a pout, glaring at me. Fuji was giving me a strange expression now, but at least he was keeping his feet to himself.
The rest of lunch went strangely as it usually did, with the exception of some stray glances Fuji and I shared. No one seemed to notice though, and when the warning bell rang for the next period, I packed up and left unaccosted. Well, mostly unaccosted, if you didn't count Momo putting me in a headlock to pick on me about how much I was devoted to my chosen sport. I got into the next class and even through the rest of the day without seeing Fuji, and was just a little surprised... and disappointed. It was hard to admit to myself, but it seemed I had expected Fuji to go to extra lengths to tease me, and it was a strange kind of let down to find the older boy nowhere in sight. Perhaps he'd taken the hint and decided teasing me wasnt worth it? Or maybe Fuji was just tired of me already and was moving on to a new victim to manipulate. Was I really so boring?
Did it matter?
Of course not.
~*~
"Oi, Echizen, what are you doing here?"
I ducked my head and retied my shoes to avoid looking up and answering Momoshiro. But Momo was persistent, and he waited me out. I sighed and sat up to give him an irritated look.
"None of your business." I got my racquet out of the bag and exited the locker room, looking for quiet corner. It was not to be, though.
"It's still raining, dummy. You can't practice in this." Momo was following after me out into the light drizzle. I tugged my spare hat down to keep the rain out of my eyes and was glad I'd thought to keep this hat in my tennis locker. Momo, on the other hand, was getting soaked. His normally gel-spiked hair was losing its battle with the rain and plastering against his head.
"Go home." I told the other boy, and kept walking, my racquet balanced up on my shoulder, my left hand already around one of the balls in my pants pocket. Momo seemed intent on ignoring me and getting himself soaked, because he kept following me. I shrugged and stopped at a convenient peice of wall. It was his funeral if he wanted to sit out here with me and catch a cold. The ball in my hand was pulled from my a pocket and after a few bounces to get the feel of the damp ball, I tossed it gently up and smacked it lightly against the wall.
Pain lanced casually through my lower body, but it was bearable, and I grit my teeth and focused on hitting the ball gently to the same exact spot. When I was doing that with absolute consistency, I changed the angle slightly so the ball came back on my right, forcing me to hit it with a backhand. It came back just to my left, just as I planned it, and I sent it back to the wall in a forehand hit. The backhand hit was a little more painful than the forehand, but still bearable, so I upped the power, forcing myself to react faster and with more precision to disallow the ball getting by me, continuing to alternate sides with each hit.
The pain was a general ache now, and after a few of these fast, hard hits I had to stop, catching the ball on my racquet and huffing. It wasn't that I was really that exerted, so much as I hadnt remebered to breath well through the pain. But it had been bearable, and yeah I wouldnt be at the top of my game today, but so long as I didnt make it worse, I would be back to normal in a few days. Maybe even tomorrow. I bounced the ball absently on the edge of my racquet as I was thinking, still turned towards the wall, and jumped hard enough to lose my timing and drop the ball when Momo spoke. I had forgotten he was there.
"Did you really just fall playing tennis, Ryouma?" His tone implied that he knew I was making stuff up, but I certainly wasnt about to tell Momo that Fuji had butt-fucked me so hard that I could barely walk today. Nope, that one was staying just between me and Fuji.
"Ah." I answered affirmatively, and then headed back to the locker-room, unsurprised when Momo fell in step next to me.
"Come on Echizen, you don't really expect me to believe that, do you?"
I ignored him (I'd had lots of practice), but Momo'd had practice too.
"Did you get into an accident? Pull a muscle?"
I continued to ignore him and Momo continued to pester me.
"Did you try to beat somebody up? Ah, no, thats not you. Did someone beat you up for showing them up?"
Okay, I had to admit, that one was possible, and I felt my lips twitch towards a smile. Momo, seeing this, rallied.
"Hmm... From the way you're moving it looks like its your lower back." He went on, and now I was a bit uneasy. Was it so obvious? "You overdid it, didn't you?" Momo smirked playfully. "I'll bet you were enjoying yourself with one of your many fangirl's, weren't you?" He was really getting into it now. "Or maybe one of these perverted guys around here just couldn't stay away from your young body anymore? Was that it, Echizen?" He was grinning widely.
Even though I knew Momo was just picking on me, I blanched slightly. I'd never thought that he'd hit upon the truth in his musings.
Momo saw my reaction and his eyes widened. "That's not-"
I cut in. "What perverted guys?" I tried to sound a bit outraged. I was trying to divert his attention, because I didnt want him to think he was right. I couldn't have Momo find out. He'd think it had been forced on me, and then he'd tell the others to try and find out who did it... and if he thought it was my choice, well, then he'd react even worse, wouldnt he? I could almost envision the disgust on his face.
"They're around." Momo said vaguely, obviously troubled. He'd also avoided answering the question, which meant he either had thought I had already known and didnt want to be the one to tell me, or I didnt know them. I was betting on the former. "Echizen, about-"
"What guys?" I interrupted again, and now Momo was definitely distracted. We entered the locker room and I turned to glare at the older boy, hoping to force the words out of him. Finally he sighed and I knew I had won.
"Listen, you didnt hear this from me, okay? But I think you're old enough to know these things..." He trailed off, looking distinctly uncomfortable, and sat down on one of the benches. I stayed standing. "You know how Eiji is always so cuddly with all of us?" I nodded. "Well, uh, he's... he's gay. And most of us think Oishi is too."
I dropped onto the bench next to him, quite stunned, but Momo wasn't finished.
"Fuji and Kawamura have both been known to have interests in boys and girls. And I don't know about Inui, Kaidoh or Tezuka. They don't share."
I closed my mouth, wet my lips, and asked the question on my mind at the moment. "What about you?"
Momo flushed. "I like girl's of course!" His tone implied that he was slightly outraged I'd even asked. Finding my world slowly being righted, I managed a grin.
"Just checking."
He grumbled under his breath for a minute before his expression went back to being inquisitive as I got up and started changing to go home.
"Hey Echizen..."
I didn't pause but kept on with what I was doing, my back to the other tennis player. "Yeah?"
"Does it bother you to know you will have to change in here with boys who find your body attractive?" He mumbled it, and I realized Momo was ever so slightly bothered by this question himself. I waited until my clothes were settled on my body and my bag was packed before I answered. I turned towards the door and as I was going by him, I spoke.
"Who am I to complain about it?"
Who, indeed?
~*~
When I got home, Nanako and my father were both quite ready to jump on me about not telling them I was staying at school a little late, but luckily, the phone rang. Nanjiroh picked the phone up and spoke for a few moments before laughing and covering the mouthpeice with his hand. I had been about to make my escape into my room when his voice stopped me.
"Hey, Ryouma, one of your friends was wondering if you're free for a date this evening." The expression on his face said he was enjoying the word 'date' way too much. I should have just said no, but curiosity won out before I could think it through well.
"Who is it?" I couldn't imagine Ryuzaki's granddaughter (what was her name again?) having enough courage to do it. Maybe it was that other girl who was always with her, the one who always cheered so exuberantly-
"Fuji, I think he said. Fuji Syusuke." My father was still grinning at me.
I felt all the blood drain from my face. How had I not expected something like this? I didn't trust my dad to relay the message properly, so I snatched the phone out of his hand to a surprised "Hey!" and brought it to my ear.
"Fuji." I was in control, and my voice was deadpan.
"Saa." The phone told me in Fuji's pleasant tones.
"Don't call here again." I hung up.
The phone started to ring almost immediately and by reflex I picked it up and then let it drop back in the cradle to the astonished stares of my father and my cousin.
"Ryouma, that's so impolite!"
"Boy, why are you hanging up on your friend?"
I ignored them both and started to turn away, but the phone rang again. My father lunged for it, but I was closer, and I got it first, but then had to fight to keep it, battling quick, tennis-reflexive hands. Finally I got the phone dropped back in the cradle and we both froze, waiting to see if it would ring again. My hand was on the phone, my father hovering over me, and for a full count of twenty nothing happened. Then quite suddenly another ring split the air. I picked up the phone and brought it to my ear, ready to end this stupid game now. I didnt say anything for a second and a tentative voice reached my ears.
"Echizen? If you're there, please just lis-"
I didn't let Fuji finish. "That's enough, Fuji. I'm not playing whatever demented game you are. Tell whoever whatever you want, I dont care. Just don't bother me. Stop calling me. I'm through with this." I was clear, concise, firm. I would not play into Fuji's hands. If he had no hold on me, he couldnt blackmail me, and he couldnt tease me anymore. I was not a toy for him to play with.
"Demented game?" Fuji finally said, and he didnt sound amused. I couldnt tell over the phone what was in his voice. It sounded empty. Could it be I had hurt Fuji's feelings?
Not my problem.
"That's what I said."
I realized Nanako and Nanjiroh were staring at me open-mouthed and I turned my back on them, wondering if they had any idea what was going on.
"You think I'm using you for amusement." Fuji said carefully.
"I know you are."
Again there was a long pause. I stayed absolutely still, because more than anything, I wanted to fidget. No, no, more than anything, I wanted to be up in my room where I could think.
"I've got homework. See you at practice tomorrow." I said finally.
This time when I hung up I didnt wait to see if the phone would ring again, because I was almost a hundred percent sure it wouldnt. And as I hung up my coat and unpacked my bag's clothes to be washed, there was only silence. I left the wet, dirty clothes on the pantry floor for someone to wash and made my way up to my room to the same silence.
It was beautiful.
~*~
A knock disturbed my peace. "Boy, I'm coming in."
I was relaxing quite comfortably on my bed with my cat curled up on my stomach as my father entered the room. He sat on the end of my bed (my eyes were closed, but I felt it well enough) and stayed silent for so long my eyebrow started to twitch in annoyance.
"Is there a reason you're here?" I asked finally, and felt the bed shift slightly.
"What's going on with you and that Fuji guy, Ryouma?"
I felt my face scrunching into a frown. "None of your business."
"Come on, boy of mine. Why were you so mean to him?"
The words popped out of me before I could stop them. "Because he's a sadistic bastard."
A short, charged silence followed. When I peeked open one eye, my father looked distinctly uncomfortable. Karupin shifted slightly but otherwise didnt react to the tension levels in the room.
"Ryouma, your not, I mean, that is..." I let him fumble because I didnt want to help him. It was easier to let him dig his own hole. "You aren't sexually active, are you?"
Shit. I hadnt thought my dad was that perceptive. Also, I thought if anything he'd get so stuck on the two boys thing that he'd never make it past that. "No." I lied pretty easily.
"If you were, or are, it's okay, really. You're a little young... Younger than I had been! But so long as you're being careful about it-"
"No!"
He hesitated and plowed ahead. "This Fuji guy... he isnt making you do anything you dont want to, is he?" And now my dad sounded more serious than I'd ever heard him. It was strange. I considered saying many things, from: "Oh no, I wanted to" to "What about the fact that's he's a he" and finally decided simplicity was the best course.
"No."
I was the Prince of Negative Ambiguous Answers today.
My father blew out a breath and stood up from the bed, looking older than I'd ever seen him look. Maybe it was the seriousness on his face. I dont think I'd ever seen him like that.
"Listen, if you ever need to talk, about any of this, just tell me. I know I'm not very reliable sometimes, but in this, I can be as serious as you need me to be. I won't judge you." And now he looked slightly pained, but it was his usual expression, not real pain. "To think a son of mine might be more interested in boys than girls." He shook his head, grinning at me. "Maybe if I gave you some of my magazines you'd change your mind-"
I threw the closest thing at hand at him (which, low and behold, was a tennis ball) and he ducked out of the room, shutting the door behind him and leaving me with the echo of his laughter. Karupin had finally been unsettled when I had moved, and he meowed angrily at me and resettled himself. I stayed staring at the door for quite a while, thinking over what my father had said, and finally a small smile touched the edges of my mouth, almost unwillingly.
A stray thought wiped the smile off of my face like it had never been there.
Everyone around me seemed to be okay with the idea of someone close to them being gay, myself included there, but I hadnt even considered how I felt personally about possibly finding other boys attractive.
The thought flung me back on the bed to do some more brooding.
Like I hadn't done enough of that today.