Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ A Romp Through Time ❯ Boys Night Out ( Chapter 4 )

A/N: Hey! `A Romp Through Time' got thirded for “Best Crossover” in the IYFG 3rd Quarter '06 awards. Thanks Midoriko-sama! So now, “Time” and “Park” are competing with each other! I couldn't be happier. More romping for all of us! At least I hope it you're all enjoying it as much as I am. I love your reviews.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters. They are all the property of Rumiko Takahashi who is to be thanked for letting them come out to romp around with us all.

 

Boys Night Out

 

InuYasha thought they did a decent job of not being noticed as he and Kouga raced to catch up with the strolling figure of the human that smelled faintly of Naraku as they negotiated the Tokyo night. However, Kouga displayed an annoying habit of yelling “hai-yah!” at the top of his lungs whenever he jumped between rooftops, and after the third such outburst the dog-eared boy rolled his eyes and took down his companion in a tackle of demon proportions atop a particularly gravely apartment complex, sliding along underneath drying laundry in a cloud of dust.

 

“Shut up!” InuYasha growled into Kouga's face as he pinned him with both hands on his shoulders. He would have grabbed the clothing under his neck, but the stupid wolf only had chestplate armor, which was inherently ungrabbable.

 

“What?” Kouga gave him a perplexed look.

 

“Stop screaming every time you jump!” InuYasha got up and wiped his hands on his pants, watching as Kouga stood.

 

“Why not?” Kouga brushed off his butt. “I jump farther that way.”

 

“Well then don't jump as far! We're trying not to be noticed! People here don't run around jumping off buildings and yelling, so just shut up.” InuYasha walked over to the edge of the roof to look down and see their dark-haired quarry disappear around a corner. “Shit! Come on!”

 

They trailed the figure, moving down to ground level after a while so Kouga could keep his mouth shut more easily. At ground level, Kouga displayed a slightly more useful tendency to jump into alleys or darkened doorways whenever a car or truck rolled by. The few times he didn't, InuYasha threw him in anyway. Somehow they managed to stay hidden until they observed the human enter a large wooden door into a yard compound. After he'd gone in, the demons approached the wooden door with a sign on it that read Tendo Dojo - Home to the `Anything Goes' School of Martial Arts - `Come Try Something On Us (Anything, Really)!'

 

InuYasha was busy sniffing around the doorway, paying particular attention to the handle.

 

“What's that?” Kouga asked, looking dumbly at the sign.

 

“It's a sign, idiot.” InuYasha looked up at the sign and then back at the wolf. “This is a school of some sort. Can't you read?”

 

“What's `read'?” Kouga put his hands on his hips as though InuYasha were trying to make him out to be an imbecile - which he was.

 

“Those little squiggles,” InuYasha pointed up at the sign, “they mean words. You can't see the words?”

 

“Nope.” Kouga squinted at the sign again. “Maybe I could in the daytime though.”

 

“Idiot,” InuYasha was sniffing again, “it's not the light, fur-brain. You either know what the squiggles mean or you don't.”

 

“What scent are you so into over there?” Kouga asked, trying to change the subject.

 

“I recognize a couple of the humans who've been through here a lot,” the half demon looked thoughtful.

 

“Other than Naraku-boy?” Kouga went over and gave the handle a sniff.

 

“Yeah.” InuYasha looked embarrassed for a moment, not wanting to explain how he knew the humans, and then ran a hand along the wall leading off to the left of the doorway as he trailed along after it, looking up. “Let's go in. But-“ he turned back to the wolf with a stern expression. “Keep your stupid mouth shut! We'll scare the shit out of them if they know we're here!”

 

“Yeah, yeah.” Kouga followed along until they came to where a large tree grew up on the other side of the wall, spreading its branches over the wall itself. Jumping up onto the wall under the tree branches, and then dropping down behind its wide trunk, they entered the Tendo residence.

 

+++++++++++++++++++

 

Akane and Ranma sat squished together in the corner, Ryoga, Shampoo, Mousse and Cologne all having arrived and taking up space at the dining room table. Dialog was lively and Ranma used all this distraction as an excuse to lean back on his hands and scoot one under Akane's skirt, tickling her thigh. She giggled and twitched until they both stopped abruptly as Shampoo brought all conversation to a stop.

 

“Ranma marry me soon!” Shampoo positively glowed.

 

“What?” The Panda's sign read until he flipped it. “When were you going to tell us this, son?”

 

“I'm not marrying Shampoo!” Ranma removed his hand from its happy place and sat forward bestowing an irritated scowl on Shampoo.

 

“But then no get to find out where time portal is,” Shampoo made a good show of looking sad on Ranma's behalf. “And no turn into boy again.”

 

“I can find it on my own,” Ranma crossed his arms in front of his chest in defiance. And I'm a man, not a boy!

 

“Time Portal?” read the panda's sign, but everyone ignored him.

 

“Maybe you should use your new technique on Shampoo, Ranma.” Ryoga said casually just before stuffing his face with a large number of noodles.

 

“New technique?” Cologne's curiosity was piqued and her suspicions raised. The boy-who-would-be-her-son-in-law had her respect as a martial artist, but she was determined not to let him best her. Her own martial arts skills were her best hope for manipulating him into marrying Shampoo someday. All eyes turned towards Ranma.

 

“Uh…” Ranma thought furiously and came up with very little to help him out of this mess. I knew I was going to regret this. The last thing he wanted to do was attack Shampoo and try to get her into a lip lock, which was the next attack he was designing into the Anything Goes School of Lovin'. Shampoo in the Lip Lock would be bad, especially in front of Akane. Really bad.

 

Just then the doorbell rang and Nabiki went to answer it. Everyone else stood, ready to meet their guest, and then turned to watch in fascination as Akane backed Ranma into a corner.

 

“Yeah, Ranma,” Akane's eyes practically spouted flame. “Why don't you show us your anti-fiancé technique?” Ranma turned to look at her, his face blanching white, and she gave him the tiniest wink.

 

“Akane,” his instincts were running his mouth now, which was very dry, “I didn't tell you something about this technique I'm developing.”

 

“Oh?” Akane advanced on him, bringing her hands into fighting stance, and the rest of the room took a step back. “So what were you going to tell me?”

 

“It's only designed to keep you away.” And with that, he launched himself at Akane as though to wrap her in a hug. Predictably, and to his utter delight, she belted him right under the chin, winging him backwards. Luckily, he missed the television and slid down the wall into a small heap.

 

“I feel so very special, Ranma!” Akane huffed out in a tone that dripped anger. “I'm so touched that you want to keep me away so badly that you'd try to attack me!” Advancing on him again, she grabbed his shirt and threw him out of the open screen door and onto the grass in front of the koi pond. In a second she was on top of him, pummelling him - gently - as he tried to stop laughing and appear to fight back. For the next few minutes they rolled around in the grass in full view of their family and friends, all of whom continued to eat as though nothing extraordinary were going on. Cologne tried to console Shampoo, who simply looked dejected.

 

“Don't worry, dear.” Her great-grandmother said. “If you were a weakling like Akane, I'm sure he'd attack you too.” This didn't appear to make Shampoo feel much better.

 

+++++++++

 

Outside, behind the tree, Kouga's attention went from the multi-coloured lanterns swinging in the breeze to the ruckus of the fight as a boy attacked a girl and the fight spilled into the yard in which he and InuYasha hid. The wolf demon watched the display of fighting technique and finesse in the yard with growing trepidation. “I can't believe that guy is fighting that girl.” He squinted to see better in the dark. “Hey! She's really cute and he's gonna kill her.” He bunched his legs under himself, ready to spring. “Come on, mutt! We gotta save her!”

 

“No we don't.” Inu sat down with his back to the tree.

 

“What?” Kouga looked down at the relaxed half-breed at his feet. “Now that you've got Kagome you don't care about saving humans anymore?”

 

“He's not gonna hurt her, fur-butt.” InuYasha pushed Kouga's tail out of his face as the wolf turned back to watch the fighting humans in the yard. There was a pause.

 

“Well, he does seem to be losing,” Kouga sounded confused. “She's beating him!”

 

“No, she's not.” InuYasha was annoyed.

 

“How the hell do you know whether he's gonna hurt her or not, flea bag?” Kouga asked, still watching the fight.

 

“I know those two,” InuYasha yawned. “They're lovers.”

 

“You're kidding.” Kouga looked harder at the wrestling pair.

 

“Ouch!” InuYasha jumped up and smashed his hand into his face. A small flattened flea-shaped demon floated in midair for a moment before popping back into roundness and landing on InuYasha's open palm. “Myoga! What the hell are you doing here?” Kouga turned to look at the little bug.

 

“I thought I heard my name,” Myoga wheezed. “Why do you hit me so hard? Don't you hurt yourself when you do that?” InuYasha ignored the question, but wriggled his nose a bit as though trying to straighten it out.

 

“See?” Kouga sounded smug. “You are a flea-bag, flea-bag.”

 

“Shut up.” InuYasha started to say something else, but Kouga had turned back to look into the yard and he reached out to whap his white-haired companion on the arm before InuYasha could speak, knocking Myoga off into the grass with a fading squeak.

 

“Look!” Kouga hissed. “It is Naraku!” InuYasha pushed the wolf's head down until he was kneeling and growling under the half-demon's weight. They looked past the sprawling couple on the grass to see a dark haired human enter the room inside. Everyone inside stood up and began to press around him, slightly obscuring their view, but it was enough.

 

“Bastard didn't even change his face!” InuYasha snarled.

 

As they watched the figures in the dwelling move around, trying to get closer to Naraku, Kouga noticed something else strange. “InuYasha?” he asked. “Why's there a panda in there?” InuYasha had a theory about that, but kept silent and let the wolf boggle at yet another strangeness about the future as they watched their arch enemy ingratiate himself into the human household.

 

+++++++++

 

Ranma had Akane pinned under his weight now, holding her wrists back by her ears. He'd never enjoyed a fight so much.

 

“Gotcha,” he said under his breath so the audience in the house couldn't hear him.

 

“Now what are you going to do with me?” Akane was teasing him as she bumped herself against him from below. Ranma looked into the house quickly to see that Nabiki had returned with her boyfriend and everyone was gathered around him. No one was looking at the two fighting in the yard.

 

“I'm gonna practice my newest technique on you until you throw me again - just for show.” He settled his weight further down her body, enjoying the hip lock for a minute.

 

“Another technique so soon?” Akane was really asking for it, smiling from ear to ear. “Right in front of everyone?”

 

“They're not looking at us anymore,” Ranma smiled back. “Get ready for the Anything Goes School of Lovin' Lip Lock!” He came down on her in a very short and very sloppy kiss.

 

“Mmmmmm, gah!” she mumbled until she managed to buck her hips up and get her legs further underneath her. With a heave of her lower body, she flipped him backwards and up over her head. Their lips parted and they smiled at each other again as Ranma went flying.

 

++++++++

 

“You weren't kidding about them,” Kouga said from his perch in the tree where the two demon spies had climbed to get a better angle on Naraku in the house. “I think he just kissed her.” The enemy hadn't done more than accept a drink and so Kouga had gone back to watching the `fight' in the yard. At the moment he lay lazily on a thick branch exactly above the struggling teenagers.

 

“Whoa!” Kouga whispered loudly as Akane sent Ranma into the air and her skirt flipped up to reveal beautiful, strong legs and skimpy, white underwear. “Did you see that?” he asked his white-haired, uninterested companion. InuYasha glanced down just in time to see the girl smooth her skirt over her thighs. He smiled to himself, remembering the last time he'd seen those bare legs.

 

“Yeah, so?” he said nonchalantly to Kouga, watching Akane go over to help pick Ranma up off the ground.

 

“That's the kind of rough-and-tumble girl I'd like,” Kouga said with admiration.

 

“Better keep claws off that one, wolf man.” InuYasha said, following Ranma and Akane with his eyes as they went back into the house.

 

“Why?” His companion in the tree was perplexed. “That kid couldn't even give her a good fight. “I can take him easy.”

 

“No you couldn't,” InuYasha sounded bored, “unless you wanted to kill him. But I don't think that's gonna be necessary.”

 

“Sure I could,” Kouga retorted. He shifted on the branch uncomfortably, gripping it a little more carefully as he worked to maintain his balance. “I can't believe you sleep in these things.” The wolf looked uneasy on the tree. “Didn't anyone ever tell you it's cats that climb trees, not dogs?”

 

“You can get down if you're scared,” InuYasha said, ignoring Kouga's attempts to resituate himself without falling.

 

“Shut up.” Kouga was still now and they watched Ranma and Akane be introduced to Naraku. “Why do you think I couldn't beat him?” Kouga returned to the subject that InuYasha suspected was a little too close to the wolf's demonhood.

 

“Kouga.” InuYasha was getting exasperated. “That guy was letting her beat up on him. He's a really good fighter for a human. It's just how those two… uh-“ He stopped, not wanting to admit to Kouga that he'd seen this particular style of foreplay before.

 

“What?” Kouga asked.

 

“Nothing,” InuYasha sighed, getting wistful about the park suddenly.

 

“So when are we gonna bust in and take down Naraku?” Kouga asked restlessly a few minutes later.

 

“We're not,” InuYasha rolled his eyes and reached around to bonk Kouga on the head at something less than full strength.. “We're not gonna to bug these people and we're not gonna get ourselves noticed?”

 

“Ow!” Kouga rubbed his head.

 

“Ow!” Myoga hopped up out of Kouga's hair. “Master InuYasha, how did you know I was there?”

 

“Just shut up, both of you.” InuYasha turned back to watch Naraku sit down at the table next to a man with long dark hair. “We'll get him when he leaves.” I can't believe I've gotta put up with these guys, InuYasha thought to himself, actually somewhat glad for the company.

 

++++++++++++++

 

Heading back inside, Ranma let Akane walk ahead of him up the steps so he could sneak his hand up her skirt, only to pull it back out, swallowing a yelp as she swiped at him with her nails. Still trying not to laugh, he followed her inside to where a crush of people surrounded a tall young man with long black, wavy hair and shifty dark eyes. He was handsome, but as his eyes landed on Akane, both Ranma and Akane felt a chill. The eyes quickly slid of her and assessed Ranma, almost as though he were looking for something. The cold, calculating glance was quickly belied by the personality that spewed forth when he opened his mouth.

 

“Jaku Nakamura.” Nabiki took the man by the elbow and steered him through the crowd of people towards Ranma and Akane. “This is my little sister, Akane, and her fiancé, Ranma.”

 

“Fiancé?” Nakamura's eyes widened as he extended his hand to Akane, glancing again with hard eyes at Ranma. “Why, my dear,” he purred, returning his attention to Akane, “your behaviour in the yard didn't look like a woman who wants to get married.” Akane took his hand and he pulled her closer to him until he was looking down at her upturned face with an intense gaze. His voice was oily slick as he said, “I'm sure I can find you someone more suitable, and since you're Nabiki's sister, we'll give you a discount on the finder's fee.”

 

“Uh-“ Akane pulled away a bit, bumping into Ranma's chest as he stepped forward to grab her shoulders and pull her back.

 

“Leave her alone,” Ranma's face clouded with anger.

 

“Ranma,” Nabiki cuddled herself into Nakamura's side and he put his arm around her shoulder, sliding his other hand casually into pleated gabardine pants, “one might almost think you cared whether Akane was your fiancé.” Akane and Ranma both shot her a sharp look, knowing that if anyone had seen through their little charade in the yard, it would have been Nabiki and she would be plotting to blackmail them even now.

 

“Ranma,” Nakamura took his hand from his pants and reached it towards Ranma's face, opening his palm as Ranma flinched away. “I just wanted to admire your hair.” His hand moved back behind Ranma's neck in a flash quick enough to catch them all off guard, grabbing Ranma's pigtail. “The whole family favors longer hair, I see.” Ranma batted the offending hand away, moving his legs into fighting stance and pushing Akane behind him. Nakamura just swept his own locks dramatically to one side and said, “There are such fine hair care products in the f- um- in the city. I'm quite tempted to open a hair salon in addition to my karaoke box.” He turned to move back to the table, pulling Nabiki along under his arm. “But Nabiki informs me I don't have enough- what's it called, my little minx?” He looked down at the girl under his arm.

 

“Credit, Jaku-baby,” Nabiki guided him over by her father.

 

“Ah, yes,” Nakamura said dryly. “Credit.” He smiled a humourless grin. “I seem to have no problem getting cash, but apparently it takes time to acquire this `credit' stuff. And by the time I have enough credit to buy a hair salon, I might not even want it anymore,” he said airly. Nakamura and Nabiki both sat and everyone else settled down to drink their tea, having already eaten while waiting for Nakamura to arrive. Nakamura himself seemed to be starving as he stuffed all the leftovers on the table into his mouth. “This is wonderful food,” he managed to say between bites. “Who made this?” He looked inquiringly at Akane, who sat across the table from him. Ranma almost started laughing, but thought better of it and then everyone in the room pointed at Kasumi, who knelt next to her father ready to spoon more rice into a bowl for their guest.

 

“My dear,” Nakamura said, leaning forward to look at Akane's eldest sister, “I'll have you in your own four-star restaurant in no time.” He grunted as Nabiki elbowed him in the ribs. “Ah!” He paused from stuffing a sushi handroll into his mouth. “I'm sorry, my little fox. How long would it be?”

 

Nabiki already had a calculator out and was running some numbers. “About six months at the rate the box is producing cash. But if I can get the credit card set up earlier, maybe we could squeeze it to four months, tops.”

 

“Thank you,” Kasumi lowered her eyes and gave a small bow, “but I'm quite happy cooking for the family.”

 

“Um, Kasumi,” her father said tentatively. “Don't be too hasty. Perhaps you should consider his offer.”

 

“Are you crazy, Tendo?” the panda's sign read as it fwipped up. The furry paw flipped it again. “She'd never be here to cook for us!”

 

Mr. Tendo looked annoyed. “Well ever since you and your entire family moved back in to the house, finances are a bit tight, Saotome.”

 

Ranma watched Nakamura watch Ranma's father, the panda, with interest. And when Mr. Tendo spoke, those shifty eyes dropped to him as though their guest wondered if he, too, might turn into a beast.

 

“Would you like something more to eat, Mr. Nakamura?” Kasumi asked.

 

His dark eyes fell on her as he replied, “No thank you, Kasumi. I'd enjoy some cold water, though.” Ranma's ear's perked at this. Although not a particularly strange request at the diner table, there was something about the way the man said cold water that made Ranma wary. While Kausmi rose to fetch the water, Mrs. Saotome entered the fray.

 

“Mr. Nakamura,” she began and he cut her off with an imperiously raised hand.

 

“Please call me Jaku, ma'am.” The way his mouth smiled when his eyes did not, made Ranma even more anxious as the man spoke to his mother.

 

“Jaku, then.” Mrs. Saotome corrected herself, “Is it really so easy for you to make money?”

 

“He's a natural business man, “Nabiki broke in before he could answer. “Every time he opens his mouth, people throw money at him.”

 

“Actually, my little ferret,” Nakamura gave his girlfriend a sly grin, tinged with a bit of an edge, “they throw money at you.”

 

“Don't worry, Jaku-baby,” Nabiki reassured him, “We'll put your name on the bank account as soon as you manage to get yourself a passport.”

 

“You control his bank account?” Mr. Tendo looked at his middle daughter with surprise and not a little bit of pride. Everyone else just stared at Nabiki, shocked that even she had been so gutsy as to put herself in charge of her new boyfriend's finances.

 

“I'm just helping him out, daddy.” Nabiki sat up a little straighter. “My percentage is really very reasonable.”

 

“The perfect relationship,” Ranma muttered under his breath and smiled as Akane giggled at his side.

 

Kasumi entered the room just then, balancing a plate of deserts in one hand and Nakamura's water glass in the other. Kneeling down beside her father, she carefully put the plate in the middle of the table and reached across Mr. Tendo to hand her guest his water.

 

“Thank you,” Nakamura said as he reached for the glass. Just as their fingers touched, Nakamura's hand jerked a bit.

 

“Gah!” Mr. Tendo exclaimed as the cold water spilled into his lap, making an embarrassingly placed dark stain on his brown clothes.

 

“I'm so sorry,” Nakamura said without much conviction. Ranma had been watching him carefully and was sure he'd seen Nakamura deliberately jerk his hand against the glass. Looking at his face as a commotion developed around Mr. Tendo's now soaked clothing, Ranma noticed a clear look of disappointment on their guest as he immediately started scanning the room, stopping on each male and narrowing his eyes. When his glance reached Ranma, the boy quickly looked away, finding Nabiki, who was next to her father trying to dry him off. Ranma rose and manoeuvred around the table to where she stood. As he passed Shampoo, Mousse and Ryoga, he realized they were all vulnerable to Nakamura's attempts to ferret out the shape changers present.

 

Grabbing her elbow, Ranma dragged Nabiki towards the kitchen. Once they were well into the hallway, he turned on her. “What did you tell him?” Ranma really didn't like Nabiki very much, but usually he just ignored her. At the moment, he was having a hard time not wringing her neck.

 

“What are you talking about, Ranma?” Nabiki brushed past him and headed for the kitchen, where she grabbed a towel and headed back into the hall. Ranma blocked her way.

 

“That guy clearly knocked the water into your dad's lap expecting him to change form,” Ranma glared at her. “What did you tell him about us?”

 

“Oh.” Nabiki stopped, understanding finally. “You think he wants to find out who changes when they get splashed with water?

 

“Why else would he have just dumped water on your dad?” Ranma fumed.

 

“I didn't realize he might find that information valuable,” Nabiki said thoughtfully, raising a finger to her lips and beginning to calculate additional profits she might extract from her new beau. Looking at Ranma, she asked, “And what do you care? It's not like it's a huge secret around here anyway.”

 

“Turning into a girl isn't exactly something I'm proud of,” Ranma lowered his voice. What he didn't say was, And I don't trust you farther than I can throw my panda not to find a way to profit off me and my friends. He settled for, “How long have you known this guy? A week? How do you know we can trust him?”

 

“Oh, Ranma.” Nabiki had finished calculating and seemed pleased with the potential profits she could make informing her boyfriend about the cursed individuals in the room. “Since you've given me this idea, I'll tell him about you last.” She gave him a deceptive little smile and turned on her heel back to the dining room.

 

Ranma followed her with his mouth open, ready to argue, when he saw Nakamura with a fresh glass of water headed towards Ryoga, who was sitting next to Akane now, backs to the open scree overlooking the garden. He's gonna dump it on Ryoga! Following some strange instinct to protect Ryoga's secret pig identity from Akane, he launched himself past Nabiki. Knowing he couldn't get around the table in time, he jumped the corner - his shoulder glancing off Nakamura and pushing him away from Ryoga - and landed right on top of Akane. His weight fell pretty hard on her and she was genuinely angry as he raised himself up off her.

 

“Ranma!” The look in her eye was really scary, and he had to do something fast. Nakamura had stumbled, but not fallen and he was headed back towards Ryoga.

 

“Sorry, Akane,” he huffed as he launched himself at Ryoga this time. “I don't have time for the anti-fiance technique right now `cuz I have a bone to pick with Ryoga.”

 

“What?” Ryoga was understandably shocked, having done nothing to provoke this attack. “What did I do to you, Ranma?”

 

“It's not what you did, it's what you're gonna do if I don't attack you,” Ranma landed a full body blow on Ryoga, who was ready for it and blocked it. Ranma had been ready for the block and managed to grab Ryoga's blocking arm, pulling the startled boy down on top of him, Ranma accepted his opponent's weight into his gut just as he saw Nakamura's water glass begin to tip. Quickly, he threw his arms around Ryoga's struggling form and rolled across the floor to slam into a potted plant near the screen to the garden.

 

“Ranma!” his mother screamed at him.

 

“Take it outside, boys,” read the panda's little wooden sign.

 

“What the heck are you doing?” Ryoga said, pushing himself out of Ranma's bear-hug embrace.

 

“You read the panda sign,” Akane came up, fuming over them both. “Take it outside!” Just as they stood, Akane sent out first one kick and the then another until they were both flying out into the darkness

 

+++++++++++

 

“These people really fight a lot,” observed Kouga as Ranma jumped across the table to land on Akane. “And I still don't get the panda.”

 

“Yep.” InuYasha had been watching Naraku very carefully. Clearly, in this strange human form, their enemy was not as violent and dangerous as he had been in his half-breed form. There was no demon aura about him and he'd been downright conversational, talking to Ranma about various business propositions that InuYasha didn't understand in the least. Outloud, InuYasha mused, “What the hell is he doing in there? What's with the water? Even Naraku isn't really that much of a klutz.”

 

Just as InuYasha's mind was beginning to sort out the puzzle of the water, Akane set off an attack on both Ranma and the other boy, sending them flying through the air towards the pond.

 

“Hm,” InuYasha said to himself as he realized what was about to happen to Ranma. “This ought to be interesting. Come on, wolf-butt. You'll like this.” Together they began crawling back down the branch towards the tree trunk.

 

“What the hell?” Kouga stopped as two figures broke the surface of the water, both substantially smaller than the ones that had entered it. The larger one was carrying the smaller one, which was squealing in its grasp. Crouching in the tree over their heads, the tree-climbing canines stopped to listen for a moment.

 

“Ryoga!” A girl's voice floated up into the tree's leaves. “Stop squirming you little shit!”

 

“Squeeeeee!” went the pig.

 

“I was trying to keep your stupid secret from Akane, idiot!” The girl was mad. “Ouch! Don't bite me, you moron. I'm doing you a favor!”

 

“Snort!” went the pig.

 

“I'm gonna put you down. Just wait here while I sneak back into the kitchen to get some hot water.” The girl tossed a little black blob into a bush by the fence and snuck back around the side of the house to disappear.

 

“That's the guy you said turns into a girl!” Kouga whispered to InuYasha, as they hunkered together twenty feet above this strange scene. Listening to the bushes complain, he added, “Was that a pig?”

 

“I'm not sure,” InuYasha replied and dropped straight down, landing on all fours in front of the bush. There was a rustle of leaves and a small black pig wearing a spotted yellow cloth fell backwards onto the ground, its big white eyes staring up into InuYasha's big yellow eyes.

 

“EEEEEEEE!” The panicking pig started flailing its limbs, trying to roll its fat little body over to run. It managed to get itself righted before InuYasha grabbed the cloth in his claws, lifting the squirming thing up to eye level.

 

“You must be that other kid,” the half-demon said.

 

“Whee! Whee! Whee!” went the pig.

 

Just then, Kouga dropped down next to InuYasha and whapped the pig hard enough to bring a swollen red bump to its head. “Shut up! We're hiding and we don't need you making a ruckus.” The pig silenced and blinked big, angry white pig-eyes at Kouga, it's little black ears flattening against its head.

 

The sound of a door closing quietly put the demons on notice that the girl was coming back. “Listen, pig,” InuYasha said menacingly, “we're not gonna hurt ya, but keep your squealing mouth shut unless we tell ya.” They stood and moved back behind the tree trunk to watch a dark haired boy run up carrying a steaming tea kettle.

 

“Ryoga!” Ranma whispered impatiently. “Where the hell are you?”

 

“Squeeee!” The pig couldn't help this noise as InuYasha pinched its butt with his claws.

 

“There you a-“ Ranma quickly shut up as he sensed the two demons emerge from behind the tree. “Put him down!” The tea kettle was on the ground and he was in fighting stance before he recognized InuYasha.

 

“You put him down,” InuYasha said and tossed the pig casually at Ranma, who caught the noisily flailing little ball.

 

“Shut up, Ryoga!” Ranma said as he dropped him on his head and picked up the tea pot. As the hot water poured over the little pig, a tall, well-built and very naked Ryoga grew up out of his pig form wearing a spotted yellow kerchief in his hair.

 

“Shit!” Ryoga covered himself. “Where the heck are my clothes?”

 

“Floating in the pond,” Kouga jerked his thumb behind his shoulder to point at a pool of wet cloth floating on the surface of the water, exposed to the light streaming from the open door of the house.

 

“Oh no!” Ryoga withdrew from the light. “I can't get them or they'll see me! Can one of you guys get my clothes for me?”

 

“What?” Kouga said. “You don't run around the yard naked all the time?”

 

“Well…” They all sensed Ryoga flush red in the dark. “Not as a human! Uh… well… not very often anyways.” Everyone stared at him until he burst out in an embarrassed flail of his hands away from his private parts. “Would somebody just go get my clothes, please?”

 

InuYasha looked at Kouga who looked at InuYasha. They had their backs to the pond and were effectively blocking Ranma's way, if indeed, he had wanted to help.

 

“You didn't warn me about this shit!” Kouga said. “Help the guy out already!”

 

“You're closer,” InuYasha said and crossed his arms over his chest.

 

“Argh!” Kouga turned to creep to the pond, returning a moment later with sodden black and gold cloth. “You owe me one.”

 

Ryoga didn't say anything, but grabbed his clothes and started wringing them out. Kouga and InuYasha watched this with bemusement.

 

“Get out of the light.” Ranma hissed, keeping his voice down. “The last thing I need is for them to see you guys out here.”

 

“Should've thought of that before you didn't volunteer to take a trip to the pond,” Kouga grumped, moving forward. They all stepped back into the shadows.

 

Ranma didn't rise to the bait; he was thinking fast. Even though he'd planned on trying to find InuYasha, he hadn't planned on bringing him home, much less with a friend. Looking the red-clad figure up and down again, he had to admit that he still found the strange guy intimidating and his friend was at least as scary, wearing barbaric fur pelts. Just as he had the first time he'd been this close to InuYasha, Ranma felt a strange energy off him, the wildness of a fighter that played for keeps. His friend had it too, and unlike the first time they'd met, InuYasha wasn't distracted with `other things' and exuded his power more fully. Instinctively, Ranma knew these guys didn't fight for fun. They were killers, and Ranma had no intention of provoking them with both families so close. He just hoped they had no desire to be provoked.

 

Ryoga stepped up next to him, wetly clothed, and immediately Ranma felt a little better, thinking that at the least the two of them had a chance if the other guys were looking for a fight.

 

“Come on, Ranma,” Ryoga said, moving into fighting stance, “we can take `em together.”

 

Ranma rolled his eyes. Apparently, Ryoga wasn't quite so astute in sensing the danger these guys represented. Unfortunately, their visitors knew provocation when they saw it.

 

“Is that a challenge?” Kouga growled behind grit fangs, his growl causing Ranma and Ryoga's hair stand on end

 

“Yes!” Ryoga said hotly, baring his own little human fangs and lifting his arms into blocking position even as he pressed his chest forward, ready to move. “You can't just show up here in Miss Akane's yard uninvited and-“

 

He stopped when Ranma's arm caught him across the chest, blocking him from pressing any further forward. “Shut up, Ryoga.” Ryoga opened his mouth to reply, but before he could say anything else, Kouga spoke up.

 

“I'll give you a fight!” Kouga hadn't stopped growling and pressed forward himself with bared teeth.

 

“Cut it out,” InuYasha put a hand up to block his companion's advance. “We didn't come here to get in a fight and people in this time don't just go around fighting each other.”

 

Ranma noted InuYasha's use of the words `in this time' and was encouraged. Maybe Akane's theory was right and these guys knew where the time portal was. This clue slipped right by Ryoga, who was still fuming silently by his side.

 

“You stay outta this!” Ryoga was bouncing on the balls of his feet as he tried to take on InuYasha. “You snuck into Miss Akane's yard too!”

 

“You're kidding, right?” Kouga completely ignored Ryoga and spoke to InuYasha, pointing back at the house. “After what we just saw in there you're telling me people don't fight in this era?”

 

“Well,” InuYasha frowned, “they don't try to kill each other anyway. At least not that I've noticed.” Turning his gaze back to Ranma he asked, “So what is with all the fighting anyway? If everyone fought as much as you guys, I'd expect to see blood all over the streets.”

 

“It's a sport.” Ranma was glad to see that in an unusual move, Ryoga begin to relax at being ignored. Maybe the moron has finally noticed our new friend's claws and fangs. InuYasha and Kouga cocked their heads, not understanding `sport' to have anything to do with bashing people around, much less girls. In the interests of keeping the conversation going, Ranma clarified. “A game. No one's trying to kill each other, or even hurt them seriously.”

 

“Fighting's a game?” Kouga shook his head and said to InuYasha, “You were right about this place. It's friggin' weird.”

 

“Told `ya.” InuYasha said dryly.

 

Knowing they hadn't settled the challenge issue, but wanting to get on to more important things like becoming one hundred percent man again, Ranma changed the subject. “What the hell are you guys doing here?” He glanced nervously over InuYasha's shoulder to the house, wondering how long it would be until their absence was noticed.

 

“Glad to see you too,” InuYasha replied.

 

“I was gonna look for you again, but I didn't expect you to come creeping into my house. What are you doing here?” he repeated.

 

“Well, I'd like to ask you the same thing,” InuYasha crossed his arms over his chest, burying his clawed fingers in generous sleeves. “That guy with the long dark hair in there is bad news where we come from. We followed him and he ended up here.”

 

“The old guy or the young guy?” Ranma and Ryoga said together, wondering if the half-demon meant Mr. Tendo.

 

“The young guy,” InuYasha and Kouga replied.

 

“Nabiki's boyfriend?” Ranma said. “He does seem like a slime ball. How `bad news' is he?

 

“It's a long story,” InuYasha answered and then asked warily, “Why were you going to come lookin' for me?”

 

“That Cursed Spring you fell into,” Ranma said, eying the little white ears that twitched on top of InuYasha's head. “We need to find it.”

 

“Oh!” Myoga popped up out of InuYasha's hair to land on an ear tip. “I know….” His voice trailed off as InuYasha flicked his ear and sent the little flea flying.

 

“Cursed Spring?” Ryoga looked blankly into the darkness where the voice disappeared. “I'm confused. What was that?”

 

“Another long story,” InuYasha sighed as he felt Myoga start to climb back up his leg.

 

“Shut up!” Kouga hissed, pressing back into InuYasha and smashing Myoga between their butts as the wolf pushed them deeper into the shadow, huddling together.

 

“Ranma!” Akane's voice floated out towards them.

 

“Don't let her see you,” Ranma said. “We have to get back inside soon.”

 

“Boy, she's cute,” Kouga said appreciatively as they all watched Akane walk out into the moonlight. Ranma and Ryoga both looked sharply at the wolf and InuYasha frowned and inched back away from Kouga's butt as he felt the wolf's Demon Moon stir slightly.

 

“She's not up for grabs,” Ranma said icily.

 

“Yeah,” Ryoga said rather meekly. “Ranma's got first dibbs, but if he screws up with her, she's mine.”

 

“Hey!” Ranma turned to Ryoga. “You've got a girlfriend, remember?”

 

“Oh, right.” Ryoga looked perplexed. “The pig girl. Akari. I forgot. Thanks.” Looking back at Kouga he said, “Anyway, you stay away from Miss Akane.”

 

“Don't worry about him,” InuYasha whispered, pointing at Kouga's back. “He's always after somebody's girl.”

 

“Got a thing for Kagome, too, eh?” Ranma knew instinctively that he and InuYasha shared a common problem when it came to their two friends.

 

“Something like that,” InuYasha said distractedly as he watched Akane call again for Ranma. Remembering how she had helped him out of his predicament in the park, he felt a little wave of affection for her and wanted Ranma to know she wouldn't be in any danger while he was around. “If the wolf's any trouble, I'll take care of her for you.”

 

Misunderstanding, Ranma bristled. “Hey! Claws off!”

 

“Not what I meant, moron,” InuYasha bristled back. Watching her move closer to the tree, InuYasha began to get nervous, not wanting to deal with Kouga and his Demon Moon if Akane got into the middle of this. “Make her go away.”

 

“It's okay, Akane!” Ranma yelled loudly making Ryoga and Kouga jump a bit. “We'll be right in!”

 

“Alright!” Akane yelled back and turned to re-enter the house.

 

“Trusting soul,” InuYasha noted, watching her leave.

 

“So how long you guys gonna hang around out here?” Ranma asked as they all stood again to face each other.

 

“Just until Naraku leaves.” Kouga leaned against the tree casually.

 

“Nar-ku?” Ryoga mouthed the name awkwardly.

 

“His said his name is Jaku Nakamura,” Ranma said, confused.

 

“Well, I think you guys missed your chance,” Ryoga craned his neck to look past Kouga's shoulder. “Looks like he left.”

 

“What?” InuYasha swung around in time with Kouga as they both fell into flight mode. Ranma jumped back to ensure his shins didn't get clipped by the long sword sheath that followed InuYasha's hip into his swing. “Damn!” InuYasha was mad at himself. “All these stupid human smells are muddling his scent!”

 

“Stupid human-?” Ryoga's eyebrows both soared up into their bangs and Ryoga suddenly registered the fact that he'd seen pointed ears, claws and fangs on the two in front of him.

 

“Let's go,” Kouga jumped up on the wall in a swift motion and InuYasha crouched, ready to follow him.

 

“Wait!” Ranma wasn't ready to let his lead on the Japanese Cursed Springs just run out on him so easily. “We still need to talk. How can I find you again?”

 

InuYasha turned to him. Knowing nothing about cell phones and everything about his plans for the next day, he said. “We'll see you at the park tomorrow night.”

 

Ranma couldn't help but smile, since that fit in nicely with his own plans for Saturday. “We'll be there.”

 

“We'll be there, too.” Kouga and Ryoga said simultaneously.

 

“No, you won't.” InuYasha and Ranma both said dangerously, and shared a look of understanding.

 

“Yes we will!” Kouga and Ryoga said defiantly. Kouga continued with a smirk in his voice, “We have a score to settle!”

 

InuYasha and Ranma looked at each other and immediately became best friends. “No…” their voices were measured and slow, coming forth in amazing precision. “You won't.”

 

Oh, yes we will! Ryoga and Kouga both thought to themselves as the demon and half demon launched out into the night.

 

As Ranma picked up the tea kettle, he heard a splash and turned to see that Ryoga and jumped in the water, only to emerge again as a small black pig. Ryoga began trotting merrily into the house when Ranma gave him a swift boot and he landed right in Akane's arms, already snuggling in between her breasts where she cuddled him close.

 

Ranma waited for Akane to figure it out - please! - that while he'd left the room flying in the air with Ryoga at his side, he was returning with nothing but a pig to show for it. A pig with a bandanna precisely the color, size and shape as the one Ryoga always wore.

 

“P-chan!” Akane hugged the little pig closer, getting ready to trundle off to bed. “Oh, I've missed you!”

 

“Akane,” Ranma said nonchalantly, in case anyone currently cleaning up was listening, “I wanna tell you something.”

 

“Can't it wait `til tomorrow, Ranma?” Akane said, petting a finger softly between `p-chan's' ears as the little pig swooned against her chest. And with that, she turned on her heel and headed upstairs.

 

“Stupid little pig,” Ranma mumbled as his mother bustled up with a load of dirty dishes, dumped them in his arms and pushed him towards the kitchen.

 

“Go help your father do the dishes, dear,” she said.

 

To be continued….