Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Reluctant Bet (2nd Labor) ❯ Reluctant Camper ( Chapter 17 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Reluctant Bet, segment 17 "Reluctant Camper"

remialcsid: ihsahakaT okimuR snwo 2/1 amnaR. rehtO srahc mt rehto elpoep.

---------------

Asgard:

"He's an even worse 'Ranma' than Grey was!" Apollo shook his head. "This is a thorough mess. What are the predictions indicating if we let things settle out as they are?"

"Most likely scenario, dimensional merger with the Pheonix Mage's home universe. Worst case scenario: Red Army tries to conquer the Amazons in 1999, and they use the Tireisian and Adolescent water in normal explosive warheads. Most of Beijing becomes effeminate teenagers. The Amazons no longer are a 'secret society' but engage their own 'Cultural Revolution' through good PR and control of their potent magic." Mambo Jack lit a cigar, which Amaterasu abruptly incinerated.

"No smoking in the GRO."

"Worst scenario, but also unlikely," Apollo said. "Where's Celeste, anyway?"

"In contact with the new 'Ranma' - she's getting him a Rulebook on proper Ranma behavior."

--------------

Target Timeline:

"Which is why you can't beat up Akane even if she begs you to," Celeste's hologram pointed out to the walking crowd.

A little stuffed panda being carried by Ranko was not currently capable of realizing WHY he had been turned into a plush toy, or he'd have realized that nobody trusted Genma further than they throw him. Or that trying to sell Ranko to Mousse had NOT been a good idea within sight of Urd. That there were patches of fur missing and traces of tar on the stuffed panda further indicated that Urd's adopted adorable little sister was NOT to be considered fair game. "Well, darn. Hey, waitaminute. The Rule is 'Ranma does not HIT Akane.' So I could cast a spell turning her into, say, a cute little tribble. Or hit a shiatsu point that gives her spastic colitis, so that every time she got angry she'd get explosive diarrhea, or..."

There were a lot of winces.

"Big brother, that wouldn't be very nice." Ranko frowned slightly.

"Besides, the Tendo household only has one bathroom." Urd took a more practical approach.

"I could BUILD a second one." He stated emphatically. "And 'Rubberpants' would be Akane's perfect nickname - she's always losing control anyway, we might as well make it literal."

Belldandy shook her head, guessing who'd have to clean up the messes.

"No? Okay, but 'Physical Mirror' would be interesting. Causes all damage attempts against the defended party to be reflected back at the attacker, she could beat herself up for our amusement." He pondered. "Only trouble is I couldn't hit anyone else. NOT in character for Ranma, I know. The best I ever came at overcoming that disadvantage was to enchant the... Ahem, well, a certain part of my clothing to visit 'below the belt' attacks back on the attacker at the same degree they were intended to effect me."

Shan's eyes widened.

Makoto scratched a certain set of maneuvers off her inventory. Not that she'd want to use them against THIS target anyway...

"Well, whatever. That Rulebook has all you need to know to portray Ranma." Celeste looked over at the fourteen year old. "You do know that this Labor is not going at ALL the way things were predicted."

"We KNOW," chorused Jared, Urd, Belldandy, Makoto, and Shan.

Ranko merely looked puzzled.

Jared sighed. "Alright, no hitting Akane no matter how much she deserves it. Insulting her, however, is in the rulebook as a *required* activity. Makes me wish I had a copy of the Exalted Book of Ethnic Humor."

~Humor?~ Ranko perked up. "Wow! Is it funny? Can I read it, too?"

Jared sobered, stopped smiling, and patted her head. "No, I'm sorry. It's not for little girls. It is a magical study on insulting words and gestures to be used against all known intelligent races and creatures. But I'm sorry I even asked because it always makes the people it is used on ashamed and angry. So it isn't a very nice thing to do. I should never have suggested it."

~However, I'm going to have to plan something else. Akane practically *defines* not nice, and is my personal idea of all that is or ever has been evil behavior in women. I exist to defeat evil.~

-------------------

Nabiki sighed contentedly as she sat down with a hot cup of tea, adding a touch of lemon and honey to the genmai blend for a further bit of elegance.

"So how're sales doing, Nabiki?" Kasumi busied herself at the counter.

"Pretty well. I put the list up on the fridge for tomorrow. Six more orders of your 'Ultimate' bento, four orders 'Extra Spicy', three orders 'Healthy Athlete', and twelve 'Regular' bentos." Nabiki smiled, an air of satisfaction around her. "How about the 'bagel cart' stuff?"

Kasumi didn't turn from her work, but you could hear the smile in her voice. "The new office building is really doing well. Many of the employees are typical unmarried sarariman, and either don't have the time or talent to fix their own lunch or snacks. I use that 'arranged marriage fiancee' story to fend off the more bold approaches. It seems to work."

"Good, good." Nabiki blew gently on the tea and sipped at it. "It's nice to see the household finances in the black."

"Yes, well, I also want to see if we can locate a naginata instructor to help me rediscover Mother's school." Kasumi broached the subject delicately. Money was tight, but they both understood that the Tendo 'Silvered Lightning' Ryuu of naginata was a part of their mother's heritage and therefore something that both elder sisters wanted revived. Akane was the Heir to their father's school.

"Like we can find someone to do that at what we can afford." Nabiki shook her head. "We have enough expense keeping Akane in bricks and practice dummies."

Kasumi made a little sound of affirmation, then came to a stop in mid-chop. "Nabiki, do you have any idea where Akane got that mallet?"

"That big wooden thing with the spirit wards? No..." Nabiki's voice trailed off. "Something spooky about the thing, isn't there?"

"It feels 'wrong' somehow." Kasumi said, beginning to chop again. "But she says it's her 'precious' and won't tolerate questions about it."

"Maybe it's just a phase she's going through," Nabiki shrugged. She was busy enough that her youngest sister's peculiarities were of little interest.

--------------------

Jared stood with his back to the camp, firelight dancing across his shoulders from where Belldandy taught Ranko some of the finer points of preparing a meal.

Tears inched down both his cheeks as he gazed off into the sunset, remembering what had been.

He ducked his head and pulled in a ragged breath. ~C'mon, pull yourself together. That universe is gone. Try and make the best with what you have.~

Two Amazons crouching in the bushes wondered what their airen was crying about? Perhaps he needed comforting? Hmm, they should start with kisses...

Jared leapt as if taking an electric shock, causing the two Amazons to go still. Had he detected them?

"SHAN!" Jared called out, counting on her bionic hearing being able to pick up his shout from where she was.

The purple haired copy of Shampoo arrived in a blazing aura, her Powerkey Staff at the ready, energy discharges in the megawatts ready to be unleashed at a moment's provocation. "Airen?!" She sounded puzzled when all a radar pulse caught were two Amazons concealed in the bushes. Danger level: minimal?

"Guard me, I've got to do some Astral traveling." Without further explanation Jared settled to the ground to sit tailor-fashion. With Shan and Belldandy watching and ready, he knew anything short of the Four Horsemen Of The Apocalypse (not to be confused with the Five Horsemen Of The Byzarre) would be unable to disturb his physical body. And as Belldandy and Ranko had been in earshot, even the Four Horsemen would be delayed.

------------

Mousse stalked the delicate blossom, a hastily scrawled note tucked securely up his sleeve (along with most of the catalog of Montgomery Wards) where he could take it out and try to reread it every so often.

"Bill of Sale:
One (1) engagement to my daughter, Ranko Saotome.
The bearer is fully entitled to court Ranko by whatever means necessary.
Offer subject to first come, first serve basis, not valid in all areas, dealer retains the rights for rebates and special exclusions.
Genma Saotome."

Mousse was *so* pleased with himself, he had made sure to get it in writing, knowing how tricky these Japanese could be.

And 'whatever means necessary' could cover quite a bit of ground when the Nichieju master of Hidden Weapons style strode forth!

He had no idea what he had ever seen in Shampoo. When compared to Ranko...

------------

"Something wrong, Ranko-chan?"

"Yeah, Bell-chan. I kinda felt this ominous sensation with a twinge of nausea. How strange..."

"You're just trying to get out of... Makeover Time!"

"Uhm, you were serious, Urd? i was REALLY hoping you were joking." Ranko backed away from the former goddess. "Heh heh. Don't you think this would be better put off until MUCH later. (Like when certain infernal regions freeze over?)"

Urd sighed, disappointed. "If you insist. (Just wait till we get to Japan where I can do it properly!)"

------------

Jared's Astral form came slowly to a halt near the village/city of Nichieju. SOMETHING had been messing with the magic he'd laid about this place.

He reviewed the obvious and came up with a blank as to identity.

1) Raw Power Level: Extreme. Evidence of elemental energies summoned and fixed, where underground channels had been altered. Dimensional barriers had been pierced repeatedly, and then rewoven almost like new. Sloppy, but with a great deal of power. Jared wasn't sure how much power, but doing things like this placed the power level uncomfortably close to his own.

2) Types of magical weaving: no single school of enchantment as HE had learned them. Which meant a generalist mage. However there was a signature in the weave that he hadn't expected.
Jared had visited a few worlds where a spell was essentially a program written without a computer. The benefit of such spell weavings was that they got stronger as time went on. That had been done in a few places. There was also something VERY familiar about the hue and shaping of the glowing lines, but Jared couldn't immediately place it.

His ghostly form swooped past wardings which would have stopped anyone else. There were several new bright weavings of magic, and one was...

Jared Saotome, the Pheonix Mage, was reminded that he had NOT seen everything.

It was an articulated statue of Shampoo, made entirely of enchanted plastic. From the look of it, the plastic was of the sort of thing he had once run into on a world known as Rifts Earth. It was colored all in silver, and this Shampoo was vaguely reminiscent of the Iczer robo. Still, that was Shampoo's face on the 60' tall golem. There was also a pair of wings on the back that could snap out.

To his magical sight, the thing was an oddly balanced mix of enchantments and technology. Further examination altered his original opinion of it. It wasn't a golem. It WAS a giant robot, capable of psychically bonding with a pilot and becoming an extension of that pilot's will. Some independence, but as long as the chosen pilot was in place it would remain tamed to that will.

Jared flitted to the next point, a sinking feeling, but was pleasantly surprised.
He'd never seen one up close before, but the underground hanger held what could only be a Full Metal Siren. Two generations up from the Veritech he was used to piloting.

If he weren't in Astral form, he'd have drooled.

Jared shook it off, more puzzled than ever. WHO could and would have done this? He'd have to puzzle it out in the morning.

------------

Asgard:

Celeste yawned as she considered the current file. Ho hum, another one of those near-mainline universes. This one was doomed to merge with yet another of the 'Ranma gets killed due to excessive pride and a desire to protect Akane' timelines. There were a lot of reasons for Ranma to die under such circumstances, but after his death their differences rotated down to such low numbers that the timelines merged together.

There were a few files, carefully hoarded and backed up, that Celeste kept AFTER their spin down or the normal termination of that timeline. One of these was the cartridge marked 'William Shatner Sings Sinatra' a sufficiently horrible title that nobody ever checked it out.
HAD someone checked it out, they would have found that someone had copied bits and pieces of other timelines, the crucial data of something IN a timeline - the pattern stored much as it would be if some Star Fleet teleporter had been used to capture it.

Celeste sent a glance to where, even now, a vastly improved village of Nichieju was being copied to backup.

You could never tell where something like that would come in handy.

------------

Dead Millennium:

"I. Am. Going. Completely. NUTS!" As this was being stated by a shivering wild-eyed woman who hadn't bathed in three weeks, this was taken at face value.

"Phew, Rei, can you at least stand downwind?" Lita waved her nose in front of her face. "You know that there's a stream over there. It's a bit cold but it at least it works."

"WE'VE BEEN HERE FOR THREE WEEKS!" Rei shuddered. "Getting by on protein bars and water, burning whatever wood we could find for heat, and that's not a stream that's a *drainage ditch* we've been using for water..."

"Look, you heard them. They turned us back from being pokemon, but as we renounced the marriage and broke a vow, we were moved back to our home reality." Mina showed a moment of tact by not pointing out that it had been REI who had suggested having the bloodbond removed as they had never had any intention of honoring it in the first place.

"Amy, any luck on contacting the Powers That Be with the Mercury computer?" Lita scuffed the dirt with a boot that was in the process of disintegrating like the rest of their clothes. Like the rest of their civilization.

"The only address I got was off this business card for the 'Heart Of Darkest Chocolate' ice cream parlor," Amy pointed out. "So far, all I've gotten is the e-mail telling us about where we could find the protein bars. None of my other demands or questions have been answered."

Rei shrieked something nearly unintelligible about the fire telling her the world needed to be purified.

"So... you've tried demanding. You've tried logic. You've tried legal precedents and accessing what's left of the religious texts. What's next?" Mina winced as Rei screamed something that sounded like a plea for the sun to burn this world clean. "Other than locking Rei up somewhere soundproof?"

There was a few minutes of silence before Amy tapped out a quick query on her computer and sent another e-mail. "I've just sent another e-mail."

"It'll be ignored. We blew it. By not stopping the Dark Kingdom. By not protecting Serena. By not approving the AIVAN project. By removing all the 'evil' from the populace, leaving them essentially drones..." Mina sighed. "Well, that guy with the flame hair assured us it would only take a couple of months to process a refugee application."

"Loki. The Norse Trickster. You honestly think he was telling the truth?" Lita twitched, caught herself and suppressed it. "What makes you think that this e-mail will work any better?"

"I don't. This time I tried honest pleading."

Mina caught Lita's shuddering and wondered how long it would be before she and Lita were screaming epithets at broken piles of stones the way Rei was doing right now. It was funny, Mina had thought that SHE would have broken first under these conditions.

Amy's computer bleeped. "I've got mail?!"

-------------

Target Timeline:

"Pops, you *can't* engage Belldandy to anyone. She's *MY* fiancee, and the only hold you have over her vanishes the moment you revoke that! Since you can't engage to anyone else without first revoking... huh?"

Jared looks up at Urd, who is pointing out the little 'Error' light. He swiftly checked the code, then whipped out the instruction manual.

"Okay, Rule Four. Logic and Ranma are strangers. Exception three: Major life change - not yet invoked in this timeline." He closed the book sourly and took Belldandy's arm, beginning to stalk away. "Well, we can still abandon him to his own mess... what?"

Belldandy had dug in her heels, and nervously pointed out the returned error light.

"Let's see, page thirty three... Ah! No matter how stupid, Ranma always does as his father says. Unless Clause Nine is invoked..."

Flipping pages.

"Ah! Clause Nine. In the event of Ranma becoming *aware* of Genma's terminal stupidity through gross acts of it, he is allowed to attempt to lead a separate life. No guarantee exists of such attempts being successful, but can lead to an Exception Three: Major life change."

Jared folded up the book. "Well, that solves *that!*" He loads Genma in a catapult and fires him over the horizon, shouting after the bear. "Get outta my LIFE, you freak!"

The little error light came on again, but Jared waved it off. "No, Rule Two. 'Anything required to protect the favored fiancee may be performed.' This includes destroying chances for cures and swallowing pride, so kicking Genma out of our adventuring party is within the parameters."

The light winked out.

Belldandy blinked up at him, stunned. "Am *I* the favored fiancee?" She asked in some wonderment.

He shrugged a little. "Um, yeah, I guess you are." ~Feelings of anyone so precious and wonderful are not to be endangered. Therefore, she is, even if it only started as of this moment.~

Belldandy smiled and took his arm. Leaning into it, she made a happy sound.

Urd made a noise into her hand, then went all false glittery-eyed and spoke with an Amazon accent as she flung herself onto the pair of them. "But good sister always share! No?"

"Aaaahhh!" The required yell came from Jared's throat.

---------------

Dead Millennium:

Amy's eyes went wide as she read the e-mail. Lita and Mina crowded close to read over her shoulder. Rei was having what sounded like a fascinating conversation with her own shadow.

"Looks like pleading worked better than demanding," Amy remarked.

>Dear Miss Anderson,
> Tyr takes a dim view of oathbreakers, nor is he the
>only one. Even Loki, who plays fast and loose with oaths
>and dislikes Grey, has decided to stick by the rules. In
>which case you are stuck pretty much where you are."

Mina whimpered.

>There is something that I can do, though I count
>myself as one of Grey's friends and I'm not at ALL
>pleased by your treatment of him. I have no problem
>at all with you using a man, but using him and then
>casually discarding him... Yes, I am fully aware of
>that love potion. If you had not planned *from the
>start* to abandon him, it would not have worked.

"B-but we had to." Lita looked to the sky. "WE DIDN'T MEAN ANYTHING BY IT!"

>On the other hand, everyone pulls "brain farts" as
>Mister Jack puts it. Therefore a second chance will
>be given you by ME. I am a powerful drow elf mage, one
>who works in Heaven but is not associated with any
>agency and therefore must thereby play by their rules.

"A second chance," murmured Amy, still feeling a bit guilty herself.

>Note that if you make this choice, you will then be
>not given the opportunity to change your mind later.
>Some will consider this cruel and evil and mean, but
>everything is relative and it is nothing compared to
>what you'd have seen in my homeland. In a process
>much like the "drawing of evil" that your Crystal
>Tokyo performed, your own will would be bent to a
>new role. You will keep your forms and personalities,
>your likes and dislikes, but will still emerge
>changed.

"This doesn't sound pleasant," Lita remarked. Still there was hope.

>Those who choose this option, come dressed as
>comfortably you can to the central plaza of
>Crystal Tokyo at noon exactly two weeks from
>the date of this mail.

"Two weeks?! We'll... almost be out of those protein bars then..." Mina considered the heap of bars they'd last seen.

"If you didn't keep scarfing them," remarked Lita, "they'd last longer."

>Those who choose to remain needn't wait much longer.
>A solar flare will erupt in four weeks, a result of
>continued instability left from the New Moon Kingdom.
>This will be sufficient to end the last traces of the
>Crystal Millennium.

Everyone's eyes tracked to where Rei was still chatting with her shadow about the sun purifying the land.

>Edema, drow mage
>PS: In case it makes a difference, if you choose to
>come, you'll be reunited with a Serena.

Three sets of eyes blinked. "Serena, but she's..." Mina's voice broke off in a sob, proving that she still had some feelings beneath the depression.

"She says 'a Serena' so one of those dimensional other Serena." Amy paused. "I don't know about any of you others but I'm going."

"Are you sure? I mean she could do ANYTHING to us if we agree to this."

"I'm going too," Mina said by way of reply to Lita's question. "We know what's here. Maybe this gal has her own agenda and rescue is already on the way. Maybe not. We can only find out for sure what is going on by going along with it."

Lita allowed this was so but had another question. "So how do we explain this to Rei?"
Nobody had a ready answer to that one.

-------------------

Terratwo:

"Lorelei-sama ?"

Lorelei didn't look up from her scanning equipment. "Gennai-san?"

"Two hairs is going to help all that much?"

"They match the hair of that woman with the dark skin. She seemed the most normal of the group who actually came in the castle. Still, you're right. We've only got partial sequences from the hair sample. We can do a little bit, add that skin and hair color to the gene pool, but nothing else."

"So why do it? If that rude person with the fire hair comes back..."

Lorelei very slowly reached out and toggled a button. There was a brief flash inside the containment vessel as two hairs were dissolved. "Excellent point. He MAY be able to determine that we had them."

Gennai nodded. "A pity, as all his talk of world-destroyers convinced me that eventually we will NEED to advance much further than we were, but the possibility of his return is much too high. Particularly if he discovers..."

Lorelei gave an involuntary glance to a very special vault containing a very special "virgin circuit". "If he discovers that we used engram technology such as Faust used to copy his memories? That we had a partially completed backup of that 'Grey' person's memories? That's our 'ace in the hole' - tomorrow Cherry will come by with Otaru-sa... Otaru and the others and we'll see what happens when it is installed in Panther. Remember Gennai, this is a most precious secret. Otaru is even leaving Lime and Bloodberry outside the castle for this meeting. If others learn of the potential knowledge..."

"At the very least, Sakyo will be less cooperative. At the worst, we'll all be dead." Gennai shrugged. "I've lived a full life. If that Mage fellow shows up, maybe I can buy you a few minutes to get away."

Lorelei kissed him on top of his bald head, which had the effect of causing Gennai to faint from a nosebleed - a very rare occurrence in Terratwo.

-----------------

Target timeline:

Ranko bounced back from the stream and slipped inside the door of the Women's Tent, coming into first the large open area that served as an entry and stables where the two cathians were currently resting on hay they didn't have horses to eat, then flying through into the back section where the bedrooms were.

Her big brother had pulled the tent out of his pocket and commanded it to set itself. In addition to the stables it had a common area with food and twelve modest bedrooms, all with their own beds and toiletries and things.

Jared had instantly declared it off limits to men and slept last night across their doorstep, a sword in one hand and a rose in his other.

Ranko had asked him and he'd said. "It's the sort of thing heroes do." But admitted to cheating a bit because his cloak was like theirs in that sleeping wrapped in it was the equal of any bed. The sword was a reasonable enough warning of "I'm on guard, please no snuggling." That he'd hoped it'd keep the Amazons away. She still wasn't sure about the rose.

All he'd said was "Dramatic emphasis."

The buxom butterfly whipped into her room, grabbed her pack, removed her towel and things, then was flitting back out and off to the stream when she caught a glimpse of her big brother taking down the tower he'd locked their daddy in last night "to keep him safe."

She flitted over. "Oniichan! The rest of us are bathing by the river. You want to come?"

His ears pinked a little. "No, hime-chan, there are limits past which male endurance was not meant to go, and that's one of them. I'd blow a gasket resisting hentai impulses at that sight, and one of the secrets of keeping the Law of Chastity is not to go putting yourself at
risk for breaking it. You go have fun, I'll go see what pops is doing over by that village."

Ranko blinked at the distant huts. "How do you know he's over there?"

Jared smirked. "A little bird told me." He shooed her. "Go on, have fun. We'll reach Japan today and you want to be clean so everyone will know what a good girl you are."

"Hai!!" The little demoness buzzed off.

The Mage started off, but one of the Sparrow Squadron flew up and informed him that Genma was getting drunk off of the money he'd made, selling them to the Amazons. That, while reprehensible, was about as harmless as the old man got. So he didn't need any direct attention.

Jared elected that he might as well take a bath.

****0****

Sailorjin Timeline:

Usagi pouted. "It doesn't work?"

Ami threw up her hands. Sometimes being the Scientist among all these warriors was a difficult task. "That's what I said. I've got the phase particles, I've got the frequency, I've got the right power level. EVERYTHING checks out OK."

"Except it doesn't work," noted Minako.

"It worked for the group that left here, it worked for that Shan person, but I can't get it to work for US!" Ami didn't know what else to try at this point.

"Makoto is out there somewhere, so WE are not specifically blocked." Setsuna seemed to inspect the device for a moment.

"Maybe it's because Makoto is such a wimp," speculated Haruka. Michiru nodded as if in deep thought.

Minako and Rei glared at Haruka, however this was done so frequently it had little effect.

Ami merely looked at the machine as if willing it to work this time.

***00***

It was a mountain stream direct from the meltwater, about as cold as they got. Which was cool, one didn't stay in martial arts shape by treating oneself comfortably *every* night.
Jared banished his stuff back into stuffspace, jumped, transformed into a silvery finned salmon, and hit the water....

Only to haul herself immediately out, shivering and freezing. Okay, apparently girls felt the cold more than guys did. Certainly her breasts hurt. She tried to will herself into the form of an otter. Nothing. A quick chi heating of a flask of water and he was back to male again.

He changed into an otter and dipped one furry toe into the stream again, instantly transforming once more into a girl.

Jared frowned. The Jusenkyo curse was overriding even her own shapeshifting powers! It read 'girl' it meant *human* girl! A touch to the ears disproved that. Apparently elven girl was close enough. Though she *could* use another ability to change to a human appearance.

Well, one didn't get training by flinching at the hard stuff. She jumped in for a quick scrub. Afterwards she built a fire and stood in it to dry off and warm up, grateful that at least the heat resistance remained.

***000***

Sakyo was grateful for Edema's assistance, though she suspected the drow had ulterior motives. The dark elf *was* listed in Grey's log entries as a trusted friend, though the degree of trust was at times strained by cultural and personal differences.

Apparently the dark elf was into certain activities which SHE thought of as exciting or romantic, and which Grey thought of as barbarous or just plain intimidating.

And the dark elf had allowed Sakyo to make a backup of her, but something curious had happened.

With every other flip-transformation into a stored persona, Sakyo was still active. It was *her* will and memories that dominated, she simply had access to the skills, memory, and form of the person she was duplicating. If she "Cutey Flash"ed into Nabiki she could calculate gambling odds and had fairly good photography skills. If Sakyo shifted into Shampoo, she knew all the Amazon martial arts techniques of the original and could speak Shampoo's dialect fluently. If Sakyo became Edema... she didn't know what happened because she'd black out until shifting back.

This scared the heck out of her.

It also meant that she had no idea of how Edema operated. What her agenda or motives were, or even how to fix that Cherry Chocolate Peanut Butter Blitz sundae.

So Sakyo Kuonji was engaging in research while another portion of her mind was engaged with the design and redistribution of equipment. It was clearly not possible to go to various timelines and scan the individuals she thought most likely candidates for her project.

Therefore she grabbed another videocassette and fed it into the appropriate slot. There was more than one way to gain data, after all.

---------------
Target Timeline:

"Ranma! You stay here while I go hire us a boat! Belldandy, would you like to come along?" Genma managed to hide the gleam in his eye as he contemplated selling the unwanted fiancee in order to pay for the trip.

"I don't think so, old man." Jared pulled out a sheet of paper, folded an origami boat, and blew on it. The paper wafted over to the ocean and became a small yet sturdy sailing vessel of the type he'd folded.

"Wow!" Ranko gleamed with eyes wide, flying a quick circle around the vessel.

Jared handed her another sheet when she landed. "Magical origami paper. You'll *like* it. I don't use much as I've so many other ways to do things, so knock yourself out. Have Shan show you how to fold a crane or something."

The group started out for the boat. Jared moved to follow them when Genma suddenly exploded into his face. "Ranma! I can see you've become weak!" He instantly sobbed. "I've been too lax in your training! For the honor of the Saotome name you HAVE to uphold the honor of the school!!"

"And this means?" Jared asked dryly, trying to ignore the liquor reek.

And that was how he ended up swimming the sea of Japan, towing their boat behind while burdened down with lead weights. It was *also* how he became convinced that Genma wasn't any hotshot as a martial arts instructor. It had to be Ranma's ability as a student.

But he *did* pick up the Oceanborn technique.

****0*0*0****

"Nabiki Tendo, fair patron of the culinary arts, today the stars favor you for you have caught the eye of the Shooting Star of Furinken High!"

"Big deal, it still costs you the same as everyone else, Kuno-baby." Nabiki frowned. Her spiritual senses were reading more than a simple idiot. Something was about to happen. Some major shift in their lives. She had to get to the temple later and see if her fortune indicated any particulars.

"The heavens weep at such a price!"

"Would you rather eat your sister's food?"

"That was 550 yen, wasn't it?" Kuno managed to find the requisite funds.

Nabiki wondered if she should go on a fasting and pray for enlightenment. Or maybe she was just nervous about the possible deal with Yamamotoyama.

**********

In some ways, the dock areas of Toyama Bay represented the very sort of things that most offended Jared's druidic bent. While a bit cleaner than the harbor at Hong Kong, it was still a harbor and still a dumping ground caused by the tide of humanity meeting a more natural tide.

Of course, his magical senses had picked up a few things, no doubt thrown off the pier ages ago for one reason or the other.

Worse, both he and Ranko had noticed a spit of land that had REALLY impinged on their spiritual senses. (He'd been a little surprised at the seriousness that the perky redhead had called forth.) He'd felt some desire to protect the innocent child, but now Ranko and Belldandy were attempting to purify the area, cleaning the psychic taint of what had been a slaughter of innocents during Tokugawa's reign.

"Ranma! Prepare to DIE!... urk!!!!"

Before the call had been fully completed Ranma had flung himself away from the intended attack and had pulled out some sort of rifle and began firing even as he'd tucked to roll. The martial artist kept both his aim and a steady stream of his velocity fire as Ryoga reacted with
panic at the stone literally being chewed apart around him by a high velocity stream of exploding bullets.

Jared then smoothly changed clips as one came up empty, covering the motion with a shotgun pumped grenade without breaking rhythm. Then he saw who he'd been pulverizing rock around and lifted the barrel of his pulse rifle. "Oh, terribly sorry Ryoga. For a moment there I thought you were an enemy. You might say that a trifle sensitized to death threats shouted
during a charge. You didn't really mean that of course. Good thing I'd aimed to miss, wasn't it?"

The stone wall that had been behind Lost Boy collapsed, all but for a distinctly Ryoga-shaped silhouette that was untouched. The bandanna clad youth was standing unhurt, but with his jaw hanging open wide enough to catch flies.

Ranma stowed the weapon cheerily, then waved a small card to passers-by. "Oh, don't worry. I've got a permit." Indeed, he was waving one of the rarely issued and almost never seen permits to carry (and discharge) firearms in Japan.

He pressed a small card on one of the frozen onlookers, containing information on a branch of a Japanese government agency. "Send the damage estimates to these fellows, won't you? They'll make good."

The youth stuck his hands in his pockets and began to wander away, smiling. "Ah, what a *beautiful* day." ~Hmmmm. That's odd. Sounded like an explosion. Better check it out.~
Behind him, Ryoga twitched slightly, still in frozen position. A tiny sweatdrop beaded on the back of his head.

Ranko came flying up, checked on Ryoga briefly, then flew off again. She would have done this for anyone, but Ryoga was quite capable of misinterpreting honest concern for a stranger's welfare.

*****^_^*****

Genma smirked as he extolled the virtues of these girls. The three Yakuza thugs seemed impassive, but Genma knew they were interested. If he did this, not only would he get money, but he could unload some of these unwanted fiancees at long last!

"What about that one," said the leader with a jerk of his thumb at the one currently talking with a pretzel vendor.

"Her name is Belldandy, a fine choice." Genma nodded. "She is quite attractive, and..."

There was a preceding rumble immediately followed by SOMETHING slamming into the ground, causing the sidewalk at the point of impact to erupt as a fine powder.

Genma covered his eyes briefly to shield himself from the force of the explosion. When he opened them again, three Yakuza thugs had become one with the scenery. One was imbedded in a wall, one pair of shoes was sticking out of a mailbox, and that looked like the leader hanging from a streetlamp.

There was also a rather large, muscular, individual with red hair and a beard, glowering down at Genma with a scowl.

"I'm just conducting business?" Genma offered.

His gi was grasped and Genma found his considerable bulk lifted in one hand.

"Look, boy-o. I'm not that keen on visiting the mortal plane anymore, and I SURE as Bragi's balls don't get any kick on interfering with a Labor, but if you try to sell MY COUSIN one more time, I. WILL. HURT. YOU."

Thinking back to the maw of teeth that had appeared at Jusenkyo, Genma came to an incorrect but understandable conclusion. "Ranma, these childish illusions cannot fool me!"

Genma was shook as if a rag doll in the jaws of a frisky pup. The tang of ozone reached his nostrils.

"Illusion?" (WHAM!) "YOU" (WHAM!) "WILL" (WHAM!) "CEASE" (WHAM!) "AND" (WHAM!) "DESIST" (WHAM!) "NOW!" (WHAM!) "UNDERSTAND?" (WHAM!) "DO YOU?" (WHAM!) "IDIOT!" (WHAM!)

Jared wandered by thirty seconds later and wondered who had driven Genma into the pavement like some tent peg. And was this an enemy or a friend?

Genma wasn't able to comment at the moment.

***********

Soun found the postcard and began a fresh round of weeping. "Oh joyous day, caloo, calay!"

"Tendo,
Arriving Nerima. Bringing Ranma.
Genma"

Soun quickly went to gather his daughters. Kasumi was, as expected, in the kitchen, fixing dinner and making sure everything was ready for her early start on the bentos and baking the next day. "Kasumi, family meeting."

"Okay, father, I'll be there as soon as I get to a stopping point."

Nabiki was found in her room, also as expected, wearing her leotard and doing aerobics while listening to her Walkman. Soun to wave a hand in front of her face to finally catch her attention.

Akane was also where she was expected to be. In the dojo, ready to shatter a few bricks and occasionally talking to her mallet.

It didn't take long him to gather his daughters together and explain the burden of honor and how important this arranged marriage was.

"If it's so bloody important, why didn't you mention it before NOW?!" Akane glared at her father. "No matter what you're saying NOW, you said earlier that *I* was the Heir to the Tendo School of Anything Goes! Anyone trying to take that away is gonna get some serious hurt!"

Kasumi briefly considered. "Is he cute? Does he mind his wife having a job?"

Nabiki looked thoughtful. "Hmmm. Might be good for my image. What are his religious convictions? Is he thoughtful? Cute? Capable of being nonconfrontational? Able to deal with the concept of a wife who's able to pull in more money than he does?"

"I don't know, I've never met him." Soun smiled. All three of his daughters were so beautiful, any one of them would be an excellent choice for a young man!

The doorbell rang on cue.

"That must be them!" Soun got up, joy suffusing his features.

"I'm going to finish my workout," Akane announced and proceeded to the dojo.

------------

weird ideas section:

That there are Rules, and complex ones, governing the portraying of Ranma.

The idea of Nabiki initially looking for means of revenue and coming up with the "bento trade" among other things. So, a version of Nabiki that never got into extortion or has nearly the gambling presence. As an entirely different professional image is required for this line of work, she'd appear different and act differently. More like Nanami from "El Hazard" and less the junior-Yakuza sort. Nabiki's success inspiring Kasumi, Kasumi doing the 'bagel cart' route. Kasumi AND Nabiki then operating a small business that is actually bringing money into the Tendo household.

The technology level in "Sabre Marionette J" seems a bit haphazard. Capable of making mongrel clones, but not able to genetically engineer enough to create a female child from a male's DNA. Still, how much genetic diversity could you get from six guys? Hence Lorelei's reference (and motivation) for adding material to the genepool.

Limits to Sakyo's duplication abilities. She can't duplicate innate powers, she can't duplicate males, and now this problem with Edema. Oh my.