Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Reluctant Bet (2nd Labor) ❯ Reluctant Conquerer ( Chapter 28 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Reluctant Bet segment 28 "Reluctant Conquerer"

disclaimer: Rumiko Takahashi owns Ranma 1/2. Naoko Takeuchi owns Sailor Moon. However, as this story isn't about canon, they aren't exactly fitting the same roles as in the original stories. Those who can't deal with non-canon interpretations have been warned.

---------------

Ami Mizuno, typical Japanese schoolgirl, was awakened by the sounds of battle as she lay in a warm bath. As this was obviously a dream, she wondered at the possible significance or hidden meanings. A Freudian, of course, would have viewed the icy landscape, the warm but cooling pool, and the purple sky above as dealing with sex.

Freudians viewed everything as having to do with sex.

A dragon, and a familiar one, was fighting a black tentacled mirror in that purple sky. She wasn't sure how to fit THAT into a purely Freudian worldview, but Ami had heard of Freud being disputed anyway. So Ami ventured a possible interpretation to this scene: the ice represented her own shyness, the was-warm pool her own sexuality, the spires of ice were phallic symbols (or perhaps indicated the trials of being an adolescent), and the purple of the sky could be all these talk of princesses - a royal color in some cultures.

Ranma, in his form of a dragon (seen when he had rescued Rei from that Mikuji demon), was therefore representing her passion. The mirror that kept putting forth smoky tentacles to attack the dragon was her vanity? Perhaps her desire for everything to remain the same as mirrors = reflection.

Ranma roared so loud that two of the ice spires shattered. Ami pulled herself out of the pool, which was re-freezing, and huddled in a cold ball on the slick surface. She was naked on an icefield, which no doubt was an indication of her own vulnerability. In the East, dragons represented royalty and protection. Mirrors were the "soul of a woman" according to some old stories, so the fight *could* be seen as a mental struggle between roles.

Ami wasn't stupid. She'd heard the odd being that had spoken with Ranma's mouth. She could turn her back on the choice, making a third choice by never going with either concept. She could choose love, in which case she'd likely be stuck with a tall muscular boyfriend who could change into an angel or a dragon at need. She remembered that kiss, and how she had been transformed back from unfeeling gold to warm flesh. Just remembering it set off a pleasant warmth. The other choice: fealty, was more impersonal. All that meant was viewing him as a samurai would her daimyo.

The dragon snapped through one tentacle, only three more began pulling him towards the mirror's surface.

Ami nodded, interpreting this segment of the dream. This meant that she didn't have long to make her choice or the third option would remain what she was stuck with. Well, then, there was only one thing she could do.

--------

Grey wasn't an idiot, despite certain opinions to the contrary.

The sentry's form of a mirror was either a symbol (in a mindscape symbols were powerful) or a magic item. The tentacles of smoke that kept appearing to fight with him indicated to him that it was likely the latter.

And as this mindscape was Ami's but fashioned by the mirror-being, the mirror was more powerful than him, but Ami was potentially more powerful than either.

Worse, he'd remembered something he'd heard about happening when you found yourself in someone else's dreamscape. If the dreamer's mind was strong enough, the traveller's mind could be restructured based on the dreamer's perception of the traveller. He'd heard of a girl who'd visited the mind of a man she'd had a crush on, only to learn that he viewed her as a child, and that her mind had changed to conform to that image by the time someone had pulled her out.

Stay and take the chance of mental contamination or worse, especially if that dimensional merger took place while he was in here. Leave, and he was giving her captors free reign.

While his jaws snapped through one tentacle, three others grabbed him and began pulling him towards the mirror's surface. Which likely would eject him forcibly from Ami's mind. His breath weapon, a cone of frost, was unlikely to be effective in these temperatures. The "Change Breath Weapon" spell had long run out. That left teeth, claws, jaws, and tail. Oh, and the few spells he had left.

Bet a bunch, play a hunch. One of his "Cure Light Wounds" went out, into the mindscape around him. The imagery shuddered as spring began to form cracks in the ice. Heartened, he ignored the frantic mirror and used another healing spell.

The mirror let him go as the thaw spread out, turning sideways and vanishing.

Grey landed near Ami and stared. He hadn't paid that close an attention before, but Ami wasn't wearing anything. She did *not* look like she was fourteen, sixteen, or anything close. In keeping with anime rules, he shifted to Ranma, had a nosebleed, and leaned back against one of the remaining ice spires. Also in accordance with anime physics, the spire cracked and he fell backwards onto his butt.

"This kind of thing never happens to Jared..." Ranma grumbled. His eyes widened still further as Ami approached him, seemingly oblivious to her state of undress. He was thinking she didn't look like Akane at ALL. Nope. Nothing uncute here.

She was walking with a peculiar fire in her eye, and a determined step in her walk. Up until she slid on the ice and fell on her own butt.

"Are you OK?" Ranma went to her as she rubbed the injured portion. No obvious injuries, other than her pride perhaps.

She hesitated. "Ranma...?"

"Yes, though my real name is Grey, as you know." Ranma tried to focus on her eyes. Eyes were safe. She had fairly pretty eyes so it wasn't as hard as it could have been. Though blue eyes on a Japanese girl were kind of strange.

A thin smile played on her face, noting the way the boy's eyes darted about. "I've made my choice."

"What choice?"

Ami laughed, which worried Ranma somewhat, even though it was a pleasant enough sound. "You'll find out later. In the meantime, I think it's time for me to wake up."

"Ah hah..." Ranma formed wings. He *did* have to get to the next one of the Senshi, but found himself wishing that he'd memorized an ESP spell. He had a feeling something important had just happened but what it was he had no idea.

Ami watched him fly off. So clueless. Just like the real one. Oh well, back to the world of the living. She'd further dissect this dream later, but for now she had to wake up. She had school later.

--------

Minako's rescue was easy, despite the presence of the sentry here as well. Odd that the connection to both Minako and Rei seemed stronger than the connections to Usagi, Makoto, or Ami. Though Ami AND Makoto's connection seemed stronger now after his visits.

The sentry was stronger in Minako's mindscape, but Minako took an active role in her rescue. Apparently she'd watched some Go Nagai, proclaiming herself "Ai No Senshi, Minako Saotome!" (He could have sworn that "Aino" was her last name, or Lovejoy in the dubs, but maybe she was trying to mislead an enemy?)

Then afterwards, Minako had proven that her control of the dreamscape was stronger than Ranma's hold. His clothes kept vanishing, no doubt Minako wanting to embarass him for intruding on her private space like this.

Then Rei's turn had come. He wasn't entirely sure WHAT had happened, but as soon as he'd woken her up, Ranma found himself back in his own body. It felt like he'd been physically thrown there, and now the pains from his physical body were overwhelming.

Akane had apparently been pounded into the ground like a tent peg, or simply buried, so that only her head was sticking out of the ground. Where the Amazons had learned to play croquet was something to ponder when he wasn't in extremis.

"Uhnnn couldja plezz stwaigten da bwoken stuff?" ~Great, jaw's broken, tongue's swollen, and the only major 'cure-all' spell, 'Heal', is already used. The Armlet *might* be able to heal me, i don't know all its powers, but how to access them?~

"You got injured saving me," Usagi said, tracing a cheek that only looked badly bruised.

"ammm naah been commesent enuu ta to it wight." (and not being competent enough to do it right.) ~Dang that hurts!~

Usagi stood up and clenched a fist in front of her, looking quite determined. "All right. I can't choose one thing because I still haven't met my boyfriend, but I CAN choose the other!"

"Usagi?!" Nabiki looked startled. "You mean you'll choose love or fealty?"

"Hanh?!" Grey wondered what they were talking about. ~What the hey is going on?~

"If it would help, I'd choose both," Usagi said, shuddering slightly as she looked at weakly moving Ranma. A glow lifted her off the ground and she started to rotate. "WHOA! Itakeitback! Itakeitback! Itwasafigureofspeech!"

Broad feathered wings erupted from Usagi's back and a pink glow surrounded her.

Sash blinked. "That was a magical princess powerup transformation sequence! What did you do?!"

Nabiki found herself gaping, but not so much that she was completely shut down. "Five hundred yen!"

"You take Chinese money?"

"At a slight markup." Nabiki said, watching Usagi gather power in her hands and begin a "Healing Escalation" on the fallen Ranma. She unsteadily plucked the money from the hands of the girl who had asked. "She just pledged to be his loveslave and Poof! Apparently the spells he used earlier *did* have unforeseen side effects."

Ranma had fallen asleep as Usagi's magic had started working, otherwise even with broken limbs, he would have run screaming from the area.

--------

Heaven, Asgard-ken, Daggerfalls:

"Why meet here?" Eros looked at the cascading waters and wondered why the water looked like it was trying to turn into ice.

"Mimir's Well has too much traffic nowadays," said the cat from atop a TV set. "Would you have preferred 'Minmei's Well'? As all you can get on THAT is Lynn Minmei music videos, it's pretty safe."

"What's that you've got on there?" Eros stuck a finger in the flow, and pulled it back with a thick coating of ice. "Hmmmm."

"'A Very Different Art' - Celeste has been making backups off that Target Timeline along with how they may turn out." Toltiir's tail wagged like a metronome. "That way the three most likely 'good' results could be backtracked and installed. But that isn't why we're here, is it?"

"You said that my efforts were amusing but that they were doomed to failure, why?"

Toltiir snickered. "You'll see. And no, I'm not taking any contrary action. In fact, I've assisted you. Then you and the various other players can see why your plans will come crashing down around you."

Eros considered, but was distracted by the television. "Dimensional fusion occurring in timeline... that's where Grey is!"

"If I weren't helping you and Aphrodite's catspaw- Nodoka Saotome, this is where all your plans would end. As it is, you've got a bit more play time." Toltiir began carefully cleaning a paw. "I know the boy, after all, it was I who intervened in his suicide attempt back when he was mortal. A momentary lapse in his sense of duty.

"After all, a twisted sense of humor is a horrible thing to waste."

----------

Grey regained consciousness with a lurch, or was it Ranma still? A dragon again, the cold torrential rain sluicing off his golden scales...

Ranma, he assumed he was still Ranma, blinked and raised a claw. Dark yellow scales, streaked with a more buttery golden metallic shading. A five clawed hand, with the "pinky" being more like a second thumb. Judging from the surroundings (some modern rooftop with a helicopter pad) he was around forty feet in length, mainly coiled up on himself.

As he had been a *silver* dragon cleric similar to his AD&D character Frostbite. The only time he'd played a gold was this mage character but he'd died while just a hatchling. A velociraptor in the hatchery as he recalled. One of the few characters he'd played who hadn't lasted more than fifteen minutes in a game session.

The rain continued to sluice over him as he considered the problem. Once again, no data. Had he been yanked out, or had the universes merged? It happened all the time, after all. Hmm. Actually both seemed to happen a lot.

A door opened and Ranma turned his attention to it, breathing in the scent of a woman.

"How long are you going to stay out here? Damnit, Ranma, you know this is a foreign city and we can't guarantee your safety if you go making yourself a target!" The girl strode right up to him without a hint of fear. The rain drummed against her red umbrella and sheeted off the far end as she glared up at him.

Ranma shifted to human form, noting that he was wearing the Armlet and that his Chinese clothing wasn't too different from what you'd expect from Ranma. Also that it rapidly got soaked until Rei put the umbrella over both of them.

Mollified somewhat, Rei started walking back towards the door, paying more attention to the night than her companion. "Honestly, Ranma, you'd think you have..."

Ranma glanced over to see he'd gotten Rei's FULL attention now.

"So, it's finally happened. Just as I and Ami predicted." Rei was sufficiently distracted that she stumbled and nearly fell.

"Careful," Ranma held her, not particularly caring that they both were getting soaked. ~Dang, this is odd. i wonder if she's a powerful psychic in this timeline or a Sailor Senshi?~

~The former, though I admit the cheerleader costume looks cute.~

Ranma blinked as Rei's mental voice was heard more clearly over the rain than her physical voice had been. He guided her beyond the door and into the stairwell as she still seemed quite distracted. "I didn't know you had telepathy among your Talents."

Rei's violet eyes looked up at him with a slight grin forming. Ranma felt as if someone were rummaging through his memories and flinched at the violation.

"Oh hush, you haven't been THAT bad. Unlucky, and there are plenty of things not to be proud of, but everyone's got those." Rei shook her head. "In that game you're thinking about, I'd be: a median-high level Psionicist with the primary discipline of Clairsentience, the secondary would be Telekinesis, and third would be Telepathy. You have the Kindredbond with me and most of what you consider the 'Senshi'. And how would I be able to brief you if I didn't know where to start?"

"Ah..." Ranma agreed but didn't think he wanted everything in his past just open and available to the public. He'd lost his temper a few times, and he'd had this odd habit of just appearing to cave in and say darn near anything to get some obnoxious people to go away and leave him alone.

"If it bothers you that much, I'll keep it down, Master." Rei smirked as Ranma reacted as if shot in the gut.

Rei led him to a suite inside what he realized was a hotel, though the room was much bigger than what he was used to. Then, yet another shock, Rei started changing her clothes right in front of him!

"Oh come on, you've seen... Actually, you haven't, have you?" Rei's eyes flicked back and he could *feel* her amusement. Still radiating a certain naughty amusement, she altered a simple change from wet clothes to a strip-tease. After Ranma turned away, she actually laughed about it. "Come on, you too! That set of suitcases are yours."

Ranma turned to see what she was indicating, noted that she was completely naked now, eeped, and started facing the wall again.

"I'm serious about this! Change your clothes now or I'll call Makoto and Minako and THEY'LL change your clothes for you!"

"urk!" Ranma went to the indicated luggage and started changing, feeling his cheeks burning as he was quite aware of being watched through the entire process.

Of course, the door burst open as he was reaching for a new pair of pants. "EEEP!"

Makoto whistled. Minako and Usagi merely giggled. Ami blushed and stared. Shampoo gave an "Aiyah! Shampoo get luck tonight."

Ranma leapt into his pants, then stared. "Shampoo?!"

"You're the Emperor of China, she's part of your elite guard," Rei explained.

"HUH?! How the heck did THAT happen?"

"You don't know?" Usagi squeaked.

"I'll explain to them, as obviously Usagi's forgotten," Rei said to Ranma then directed her next comment to Ami. "Why don't you give him a quick rundown? BRIEF, mind you, it's already late."

Ami nodded and explained that this was how they remembered events, or was the way the merged timelines had sorted out.

Apparently Genma had lost the real Ranma in a training accident years ago involving a rusty nail and a resulting infection. Then, fearing to return home, had come across a baby in the mountains who had apparently been abandoned. He had been raised much as a human, though his nonhuman heritage had provided clues for several years.

Then, at age ten, Genma had tried some sort of training involving a pit of cats. Ranma had assumed his dragonform for the first time since he was hatched and had literally flown the coop. The dragon hatchling had eventually been discovered by Minako, and it had awakened her ability to generate mystic forcefields after she had declared her love for her pet.

Apparently he'd then used his ability to Polymorph and had spent several years as either her pet cat Orion or her boyfriend Grey. When they'd both turned fourteen, his secret had been discovered. First by Ami who had deduced something atypical about the cat, then Rei who had sensed his identity, then Usagi who literally had stumbled across it, then Makoto (Usagi had blabbed), then Michiru and Haruka and Setsuna and then the intrepid Dragon Hunters. This last group had caused Ranma to flee rather than cause all his new friends and "owner" to become targets of the various people out to kill or capture the dragon that had been occasionally spotted in Juuban.

Apparently he had not expected his friends to be targets anyway. As soon as there had been a report of him being sighted in China, they had been gathered up and brought to where they could be used to blackmail him. Apparently after Rei had telekinetically flattened the first group of kidnappers, they'd opted for using drugs to keep them all fumble-witted for the duration.

When Ranma HAD finally come to their rescue, with the aid of a group of Chinese Amazons, he'd had to make a few promises for their assistance, he'd ended up using a set of spells called the Kindredbond to purge the opiates from their system or they'd all have ended up drug addicts with permanent brain damage.

Among other things, it had reversed his previous relationship with Minako - which she seemed to take a perverse delight in acting out. He had also ended up with his first dimensional teleport and a long trip in which he ended up with MORE Bondgirls and a few other hangers-on of both genders and assorted species. By the time he returned to China, they'd visited a half dozen parallel realities and were now a small army. Two days had passed in China, eight months had passed for them.

Then had come an attack by the Chinese Army, and one thing had led to another. Ending with a new Emperor of China, the Imperial Dragon.

During the first few months of fighting Kyusaku Natsume had invented a bodyguard for him, Atsuko "Nuku Nuku" Natsume, and had jokingly mentioned that she'd make him a fine wife. The "joke" had gone way too far and before things had settled down, Ranma had found that one of the papers he had signed and been too busy to fully read had NOT been to give his kindredbonded girls a military rank - but that he had been married to them.

No, Ami reassured Ranma before he could faint, the marriages were not consummated in the usual manner. Ranma wondered what THAT meant but wasn't sure he wanted to know.

So here he was, Ranma Saotome, in the Chinese embassy in Tokyo. Here at the bequest of his adoptive mother with the Armlet that she had sent him, the whole thing being something of family honor and duty that he had to resolve.

His relationship with the bonded girls was that they were essentially fiancees as there were too many for him to marry, the consensus voted for (something that amused the heck out of his subjects) was that he could marry no more than a dozen. The rest would have to be followers, advisors, soldiers, or whatever other roles they could choose.

Ranma got the definite impression that few if any of the choices were up to him and that he'd been putting off the whole thing as much as possible. From Ami's perspective, the choice of First Wife was simple: the most logical choice was Ami herself, after all, because he'd need the Smart Fiancee there in the chief advisor role.

At this point the door burst open again and there was a loud set of disagreements from everyone concerned except Ranma who simply went into shock. He only got bits and pieces as everyone was talking all at once, but he got the gist.

The newly arrived Nuku Nuku protested that as she was literally made for Ranma, therefore *she* should be first. Minako argued that they had the longest history, and she was his "First Pet" (wince) already so *she* should get the First Wife position. Makoto argued that they'd hit it off since day one and that she had always considered him as her sempai, not like Minako who had passed him off as her pet cat. Usagi protested because he was cute and therefore fair game, besides - he had never made fun of her odango hairstyle. Shampoo protested as he had allied himself officially with the Chinese Amazons, and had defeated her in a duel to get that alliance, therefore they were already officially married. Rei stated that she knew him better than anyone, that they were close already, and besides she could use her psychic abilities to *see* that she was his best choice.

Hotaru, Michiru, Setsuna, and Haruka all argued - mainly for the sake of not feeling left out. Each felt that as the First Wife would be his closest advisor, most trusted bodyguard, and in charge of the country when off in one of his long dragonsleeps, that THEY were the best choice for the position. Even if Haruka and Michiru were more interested in each other than Ranma THAT way, and if he chose one he'd end up choosing both.

Ukyo used the concept that the real Ranma had been HER fiance, therefore the new Ranma was also her fiance, and that at least he wouldn't starve the way he would if he chose Usagi. That comment, of course, started another series of confrontations.

Sash, Azure, Talcum, Fumika, and a girl who was WAY too young to really be Cologne all pressed their suit in the manner of Shampoo.

"Oh dear," Ranma summed up. "Errr. So, uhm, well..."

Rei spoke up. "C'mon people, don't crowd the poor Emperor. He needs to be briefed though, so, Shampoo and Minako, if you would do the honors?"

"Rei? You're giving up the chance to be with Ranma?" Minako was immediately suspicious. It wasn't like Rei to be THIS gracious.

"We'll find out what Saotome-san wants tomorrow and get this over with, then return home to the Alabaster Palace." Rei figured she had the leadership role for now, and might as well run with it. She knew as long as she was fair even those who disagreed with her privately wouldn't dispute it in the Emperor's presence. "Just remember, my lord, you have many enemies."

"Uhm, what enemies?"

"That you conquered China, and brought about a new age of magic and culture and prosperity is viewed by some others as being illegal or at least immoral," Cologne volunteered, sweeping her black hair off her shoulders as if preening. "Others wish to rid the world of some horrible beast, or gain fame by your destruction. Some countries also desire to get their hands on the technology and magic you and our forces demonstrated."

Setsuna nodded at Cologne and added "There are also the menaces of the Dark Chambermaid, who may actually be the catspaw of Nehelenia. There are even assassins, loyal to the former government of China, who plan your death as if that would undo the entire knot."

----------

Ranko waited impatiently, flitting back and forth in the hallway. Finally a crowd of others started filing out of the room. "Is he OK?"

Nobody was quite sure how to explain this to Ranko. Finally it was Ami who decided to take the Emperor's sister under her wing and try to explain this complication.

"Nuku Nuku want to stay." The catgirl android pouted as she complained to Rei.

"Hitting him with too much at once won't help matters. And all of us at once? You *know* how he hates to be crowded."

Nuku Nuku scowled but realized Rei was right.

"Why those two?" Setsuna asked, beating Cologne by a heartbeat.

"They represent the two major groups vying for the main spot," Rei said in her 'professional voice'. "The reincarnated Moon Kingdom on one hand, the Chinese Amazons on the other."

"HEY!" Mayumi protested, overcoming her near-terminal shyness away from her mech.

"'groups'" repeated Rei. "Admittedly there are many candidates not associated with either group. This was the only solution I could come up with, and it IS a compromise, but it gets past the first few problems. Now remember that he won't remember you."

"I need some sake!"

"Ayanami-san, can you keep an eye on Misato-chan? We don't want her falling asleep in the tub again."

"So," Mayumi interjected, "it's basically a fresh start for all of us. Is this the Grey we knew or is this actually someone different."

"That was essentially his shadow. Remember, we've gone over this before. He'll get a few memories from the effect, but essentially we're dealing with the Ranma/Grey we've known as if he was an amnesiac. In a few days, however, this will all change as our timeline is still unstable." Setsuna was the expert in this field.

"I don't even begin to claim to understand all this," Megumi stated, "but essentially the Emperor's going to have to be introduced to us all over again?"

It was obvious that Rei had an idea occur to her, the mischievous gleam drew the others' attention from the events in the room behind them.

-------

Ranma stretched and looked around. Various "Senshi" in the room, plus Ukyo, Shampoo, Nuku, and a few others. It was Rei who had led him to the center of the room, and now Minako who stood before him, blushing!

Minako cleared her throat and sang, fairly well, but that was expected of someone who dreamed of being an Idol Singer. She was wearing a gown slit up on the side to her thigh.

"Poor wand'ring one!
Though thou hast surely strayed,
Take heart of grace,
Thy steps retrace,
Poor wand'ring one!"

Minako handed off the microphone to Rei, who was wearing (for whatever odd reason) a *seifuku* despite not being a Senshi in this timeline.

"Poor wand'ring one!
If such poor love as mine
Can help thee find
True peace of mind-
Why, take it, it is thine!"

The door behind him opened suddenly and a group of other girls stuck their heads in briefly.

"Take heart, no danger low'rs;
Take any heart but ours!"

Rei handed off to Ami, and if Minako was blushing it looked as if Ami wanted to crawl under a rock and hide - if her cheeks didn't explode from blood pressure. She was wearing a simple pair of blue jeans and a blue turtleneck.
"Take heart, fair days will shine;
Take any heart -- take mine!"

The girls in the doorway spoke up again as Ami put the microphone down and fled to a corner.
"Take heart; no danger low'rs;
Take any heart -- but ours!"

Minako glared at Ami, who was perspiring rather heavily and had turned scarlet. Usagi tripped and facefaulted on the way to the microphone. Still prone, (and wearing a bunny costume for some odd reason) Usagi reached out and grabbed the microphone. Her singing was a bit offkey compared to the others.
"Take heart, fair days will shine;
Take any heart -- take mine!"

Shampoo snagged the microphone as she passed Usagi, her cheongsam flaps fluttering as she slid into place.
"Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Poor wander one!
Though you surely stray,
Take heart of grace,
You steps re-trace"

The girls came from their position around the walls and rotated around Ranma, now singing in chorus. The girls in the doorway went back into the hall and closed the door.

"Poor wand'ring one!
Poor wand'ring one!
Ah, ah! Ah, ah, ah!
Poor wandr'ing one!
Ah, ah! Ah, ah, ah!
Fair days will shine,
Take heart, Take heart, Take heart,
Take ours!
Take any heart Or All!
Take heart! Take heart!
Take mine! Take heart, no danger lowr's;
Take any heart take ours!
Ah, ah! Take heart, take heart, Ah!
Take any heart of ours.
Take heart! Take heart!"

Ranma was SURE that he was literally going to die of embarassment, and wondered if they were trying to tell him something.

--------

Hours later, in a dark room several shadowy figures gathered around a dark table where a single dim light from below gave them an ominous dramatic mood.

"It would seem that more desperate measures are required." Ami said, her glasses gleaming as she looked above her steepled hands. In the dark, no one could see her blush.

"Agreed," said Rei from her position in an identical pose.

"You guys are creeping me out," Misato complained, most definitely NOT taking a 'Gendo Ikari' pose. She was alone in that regard as even Ayanami had put on a pair of glasses and was doing the smirk and pose.

"Heh heh," said Urd III, enjoying Misato's discomfort. Sure they were drinking buddies, but Urd took a perverse delight in Misato's hangovers.

"Who's with him now?" Rei's voice was, as usual, calm and soft spoken.

"He's gone to meet his mother. Belle, Minako, Sash, and Nuku Nuku." Cologne was in the Gendo pose, especially as they'd rented "End and Death of Evangelion" two nights ago.

The common consensus was *never* put a weenie in the position of "person you rely on to save the world."

"So how do we convince him?" Misato leaned back in her chair and looked over the other thirteen, at least as best as she could. That movie couldn't have been accurate, could it? She hadn't been *that* blind, surely. No, it had to be artistic license. Even though Kaji had... Misato REALLY wanted a drink but allowed that an alcoholic haze wasn't the best thing for one's judgement. After all, look what happened when she sworn fealty to this guy under such a condition - he'd suggested one morning that she start eating healthier and she hadn't been able to eat junk food since then! She shuddered at the thought of what would happen if he simply told her that she should lay off the drinking.

"How about this," Ex-el suggested, her artifical voice quite distinctive among the crowd, "individual initiative. Each of us makes a single attempt, and we can pool the attempt in a group, but only one attempt no matter what. We wait till everyone has had a chance to hear of it, except for the Emperor, of course. Interfering with someone else's attempt is grounds for disqualification."

Ami considered this for a moment. "Interesting. This way, the one who can convince him of her superior claim, is likely to prove herself the most clever or intelligent - therefore the best choice for First Wife."

"I like it," Rei said, thinking of a number of things she might try.

Ayanami considered for a moment. "Then, may the best woman win."

---------

Ranko's wings fluttered nervously. "How do I look?"

"Oh my goodness, look at that spot!" Makoto pointed, then flicked Ranko's nose. "You've asked me that three times, you look fine, what gives?"

"Aka-chan was my best friend back then," Ranko said with a wince. "But she's kinda protective of me if that last letter was any indication. I just wanna look my best but not look TOO good. She's kinda got some strange ideas."

"Aw, how bad could it be?" Makoto opened the outer gate. "Let's see 'Tendo Dojo. To challenge owner in violent combat, use rear gate.' Well... that's not too outrageous."

Ranko chewed her lip and rang the doorbell.

The door opened with a gust of wind, revealing a girl who immediately swept Ranko in for a hug. "Oh it's good to see you again!"

"Big sister Kasumi!"

Another girl stepped out of the shadows, causing Makoto to yelp and nearly manifest her magic devilhunting hammer 'Tempest's Rage' from its extradimensional pocket.

"Big sister Nabiki!" Ranko detatched herself from Kasumi to give a quick hug to Nabiki. "It's so good to see you two!"

"Akane's changing clothes, so come in before she has a chance to..."

*SLIDE-TRIP* *CRASH* *THUMP!*

Everyone took a brief moment to stare at the girl who had come running, unfortunately to become reaquainted with the problems of Friction, Momentum, and Gravity. In layman's terms, slipping from a lack of friction, flying over the stairway, and landing facefirst on the floor in front of the stairwell.

Akane lifted herself up a moment later though, being sufficiently tough from her martial arts training that a fall of a few meters onto her nose wasn't that big a deal. "RANKO!" Akane's eyes locked onto the redhaired batwinged girl framed by the doorway with an audible click.

"Oh, hi Akane! How ya doing?" Ranko waved and smiled cutely.

Akane had carefully played this scene over and over again in her mind. She'd rehearsed hundreds of things she could say, knew exactly how perfect she wanted this reunion to be, up until the scene dissolved in soft lighting and a torrent of rose petals or sakura leaves with Ranko tenderly held in her arms.

Unfortunately, as Sun Tzu once remarked, no plan ever survives contact with the enemy. Or as the philosopher Murphy noted: "That which can go wrong, will go wrong, in the manner that will cause the most mess."

And so, the formal kimono that Akane had cleaned and pressed, carefully chosen for maximum compliment to her coloration and body shape, got snagged on a piece of wood flooring chipped from Akane's impact on that very same floor. The very same delicate fabric that had just gotten ripped from that same impact.

The kimono ripped very audibly, and though the rip was only a foot long at the hem, Akane's reaction to the "perfect moment" being destroyed was quite understandable.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" *ZIP ZOOM ZING!*

Everyone blinked as Akane vanished up those same stairs.

"Uhm, that was Akane, right?" Ranko said. "Hmmm. I thought she wanted to see me. Oh well, so how's it going here? Last letter I got said..."

---------

Ranma had finally met "his" mother, and if he hadn't had last night's briefing he would have found some of the relevations amusing to say the least.

Nodoka Ishikawa, sister to Goemon Ishikawa (one of Arsene Lupin III's gang), had divorced Genma Saotome in recent years - citing abandonment. Genma and his buddy Soun had apparently gone on a brief foray to something called the Kami Plane, and had emerged with some quickly squandered wealth as well as some children from "adventures" they'd had.

The *original* Ranma had died due to a training accident. He'd been taught the Touched Soul technique and had gone mad and set himself on fire as a result. When Nodoka had heard the full details of this, not simply Genma's tale, it was a primary reason for the divorce.

The current Ranma had been adopted as Ranko's big brother. Ranko herself was the product of an adventure Genma had gone through on that Kami Plane, and was the daughter of Genma and a succubus named Fleish.

Nodoka had proven to be calm, polite, and quite well mannered. Of Genma, she refused to speak. Her daughter Ranko, for all that she was Ranko Saotome and not actually related to Nodoka in any manner, was a beloved child who had been in Ranma's camp during the China campaign. She had written Nodoka on a number of occasions, and so the former Mrs Saotome had a pretty good idea of what had gone on during the news blackouts.

Nuku Nuku had been mentioned as a friend of her daughter's and was greeted nearly as warmly as Ranma himself. Minako and Belle had gotten slightly briefer hugs, as well as some whispered comment that had Belle blushing and Minako staring off with some silly grin for awhile.

None of this, however, was what had gotten his attention at the moment.

"High School?! You want me to attend Japanese High School?!" Briefly, Ranma wondered if that was one of those Rules Of Ranma - it seemed like an awful lot of them where it wasn't even vaguely logical ended up with him staying at the Tendos and/or attending Furinkan High School. Sometimes where he wasn't staying at the Tendo-ke and he'd have three hours one way of bus time just to get to school.

Nodoka sat back and regarded her son briefly. "Yes. Does this present a problem?"

"I'm the Emperor of China (still trying to get used to that!) and a dragon. And WHY three weeks?"

"From what Ranko was saying, most of your personal staff are also high school age," Nodoka eyed the three girls with Ranma. "And, well, you are in the public eye. Graduating from High School, willing to meet your responsibilities in such a manner, it would help your image and the image of your country."

Ranma KNEW that wasn't the real reason, but that he also wouldn't be able to get Nodoka to give those real reasons at this point. Standard anime procedure was to go along with the plan and hope you could spot it before you got hit with the Terrible True Plan.

Minako jotted it down. "You know, it wouldn't be so bad. Cologne could go back and handle the administration tasks, plus your other appointees are already doing a pretty good job. Which High School?" ~After all, I've got to make sure I'm registered too!~

Ranma mouthed the name in synch with Nodoka's voice. "Furinkan Senior High School in Nerima."

--------

Ranko fidgeted after a few minutes of Akane staring at her, then checked her blouse. No stains... "Uhm, Akane-chan?"

"Eeep?" Akane eeeped on the outside. Inside she was doing handsprings. ~She called me Akane-CHAN! What joy! What bliss!~ And as Akane had considerable practice with fantasizing about such an event, she went ahead and was in full daydream mode immediately.

"Aka-chan?" Ranko was a little put off by the little trail of drool from Akane's mouth. "Errr. Gee, maybe I should get back to the embassy. Akane's not looking too good."

Kasumi was a little puzzled by Akane's reaction, but thought the embassy sounded quite interesting. Nabiki heard the Embassy and was likewise intrigued.

"No Ranko, not here, ohhhh Ranko-sama!"

Ranko scratched her head as Akane blushed and hugged herself, making odd coo-ing noises as she did so. "Hmmm. I guess Akane isn't feeling well."

"I'll keep an eye on her," Soun volunteered, concern for his True Daughter (Akane being the only one by Kimiko - a Japanese woman), giving him a mature parental air that would be out of place for anyone familiar with the manga. "Though we *are* expecting a visitor later. Maybe you could rejoin Ranko later when Akane's feeling better?"

"Oh, Ranko-sama! No! Not there, Ranko-sama!"

Ranko frowned slightly. ~I thought Akane *wanted* to see me again. Oh well.~ "Well, if you two want to come later. Prince Rammie would be really happy to meet you, I'm sure."

"Prince Rammie, the Emperor?" Nabiki and Kasumi were both quite intrigued. Rumor was that he had supernatural beings on his personal staff. Meaning that they would not run into the usual prejudices with such a man, and there was the distinct possibility of employment. (At this point Kasumi diverged into thoughts of kitchens and wide spacious rooms while Nabiki thought of mines and accounting positions.) "We'll be there!"

--------

"Prince Rammie" (it turned out that Ranko had started calling him that and it had become a nickname) was bemused under his grumbling exterior. And canon-Ranma thought HIS life was the center of a storm of weirdness!

THIS Ranma had forty-nine fiancees, who were currently in an uneasy truce. While canon-Ranma had a Chinese Barbarian as his most exotic would-be cuddle-mate, *this* Ranma had: androids, elves, dragons, psychics, wizards, cyborgs, Norwegian Amazons, girls from the future and past and future/past, shapeshifters, mecha pilots, and a group not-quite-Senshi among his fiancees. Where canon-Ranma only had to worry about Shampoo doing something weird with ramen or hair soap to Akane and fights involving one or two interested girls, *this* Ranma had to deal with rumbles between the not-Senshi, Chinese Amazons, and the Independents.

There were another ninety-two who WOULD be fiancees but didn't like the competition or the commonly accepted idea that whoever got Ranma would be sharing with at least a small group of others. The "Not the Fiancee" brigade mainly amused themselves on the outskirts of the trouble, keeping things stable enough that massive property devaluation did not occur but stirring things up whenever one group or another looked to be gaining ground.

There was even one ninja assassin (a kunoichi named Raiko) who had decided that she could best accomplish her mission as the Empress-Wife. As she had been discovered by Rei early on, and Ami had put a spell on the assassin, she was not much of a threat actually. The only method for killing the Emperor she'd go for was "the Death Of A Thousand Caresses" and she was far too ticklish to be able to get past the first fifty.

As for rivals? canon-Ranma had to deal with the martial-artist-of-the-week and Ryoga mainly. Add Kuno and Mousse if one felt generous. Add Tsubasa if one wanted to be ridiculously so. Emperor Ranma had political rivals like... the United States?! (Who kept trying to send spies among other things, and was loudly declaiming the "backwards and repressive" Chinese Empire despite the standard of living having more than tripled over the past year.) He had groups like Greenpeace and the Naturists who decried the "glorification of technology" in the Empire, and these also sent agents to screw things up or stir dissent. There were certain Christian groups who decried the Dragon Emperor as the incarnation of Evil. (Apparently his meeting the Pope and allowing old-style monastaries inside the Empire had abated somewhat the hostilities from the Catholics and some of the less strident Christian groups. Though these had to be weeded of spies regularly.)

Rivals? Heck, Emperor Ranma had rivals working for him! Astarte was a dragon who considered Ranma's association with humans to be a perversion. So Astarte would, every two months or so, show up and try to pound some sense into Ranma's skull. Otherwise Astarte was fond of patrolling the Northern border and had a tendency to eat unauthorized traffic. It might have been barbaric by civilized human standards, but it did cut down on repeat offenders. There was the swordsman Xu Gong Gao who had sworn that he would defeat the evil dragon that terrorized his people. Xu had learned that the dragon was neither evil nor particularly terrifying, but his oath remained. There were rivals who sought to usurp his position in the Chinese Empire like Cao Bien, a former student of the Arts Magical in the Imperial College turned bumbling would be conquerer.

There was Herb and Saffron, though both had lost major battles and their kingdoms were now part of the Empire itself. Heck, Kiima had sworn fealty to Ranma ten months ago (apparently she hadn't realized that there was more to the oath than a verbal pledge) and now was part of the Fiancee forces (allied with the Amazons) and Phoenix Mountain's forces were an accepted part of the new China. Still, both had a number of loyal troops lurking in and about China. Though Herb's forces had suffered heavy losses during the Yellow River Uprising.

And then there was... well, THEY weren't a problem any more. He'd thought it was an interesting idea apparently, and it fit the original concept of the dragonmage as a "curious catlike" sort of being. A whole group of Chinese Red Army, 100,000 strong, with their bombers and rifles and tanks. Backed by mercenaries and forces from other countries to "retake" China in what would have been a massive fight. The one group had totalled over 2,520,000 soldiers (Minako had forgotten the exact count) and would have fought a superior armed 4,000. Except it hadn't happened that way. The Emperor being a mage had studied the Jusenkyo springs from some samples of water, and this was a world with a "Spring Of Drowned Bishojo Bride." He'd used a massive spell, a ritual casting to up the power, with the assistance of Ami and some of the other mages to intensify the spell further.

Until then, there had been a serious problem in China because the number of guys far exceeded the number of available women. This had solved *that* problem, but now apparently just about anyone who was gender dysphoric had heard the rumors and started flocking to the area. Three of his mages were working on a magical Dressing Room that had the same effect, and the Amazons were apparently interested in swelling THEIR numbers with something similar. It was still a problem, just easier to deal with than gun-toting mercenaries.

Canon-Ranma had to deal with enemies out for his blood. Guys like Mousse and Kuno who didn't know when to quit, the martial-artist-of-the-week coming in like a gunslinger from an old Western, or something else. Emperor Ranma had those too. And people like the Black Circle who wanted to seperate him from his internal organs in order to cast powerful spells. All the way down to... Mousse. Who had stopped bothering him after Shampoo had tossed him into the Spring Of Drowned Bishojo Bride and then used the Musk locking ladle on him.

Hmmm. That reminded him, Mousse was expecting now and he ought to send a nice present to the Mother-to-be just to indicate there were no hard feelings.

Then there was Nehelenia and the Dark Chambermaid for the Sailor Moon influence, some idiot called Mephisto Rage who apparently had access to android construction techniques (Minako revealed that nobody was quite sure *why* this guy kept attacking - especially as his facemask garbled his voice enough that nobody could quite make out what he was saying and they were only guessing it was his name because it was painted on his chestplate), and the dreaded Team Tuxedo. (He was guessing this was like Team Rocket except these were two guys wearing tuxedos who kept trying to attack various girls. Nobody was quite sure why.) Oh and a talking dog and little nerd boy that apparently kept trying to cause trouble, though Setsuna Meiou and Rei had been able to foil their (usually petty time manipulation) plots.

Now, add to that a mother who was actively trying to fix him up with women. Genma, Soun and the rest of the Tendos he hadn't heard anything about yet. Other than Ranko wanted to go visit them. He wondered if Ryoga and the rest would show up, they *usually* did - part of that ta'verren thing he supposed.

Still, he'd been in crazier situations like that time a timewalker had accidently killed her own mother, and to stabilize things he'd had to play the part of a girl named Mayumi Akeda in 1920s Tokyo for a week. Being eight months pregnant had NOT been fun. He'd been in more violent situations like that Pokeslave world. He'd been briefly (Eiris proving to her brother that she could get creative with traps and alterations too) stuck in a world where Ataru Moroboshi had gotten ahold of three wishes so he'd been in situations which were gross and disgusting. The time he'd had to work as a "spear carrier" mechanic in the Rebel Alliance had been more uncomfortable (cleaning up after R2 had turned up the heat in an ice cave with a Princess yelling about the damage to her clothes hadn't been fun at all.)

THIS, this was... amusing for the most part. Canon-Ranma would have whined and moaned and gone off in search of a martial arts fight, he thought. Of course, THAT Ranma would have had all these girls after him for something besides a joke.

People out to kill him, well, he still took that personally.

"Emperor, a moment of your time," a newshound called out, giving chase at the forefront of similar individuals.

Belle, Minako, Nuku Nuku, and Sash were still with him.

Belle smiled pleasantly. "It's a good day for flying, isn't it?"

"Nuku Nuku could carry?" The cyborg catgirl scanned the crowd and found no weapons. "Threat potential minimal. Nuisance potential high?"

Sash looked up from her manga that someone would DARE disturb her from reading the latest Toriyama fight sequence!

Minako frowned and let sparks gather around her fingers.

Ranma considered. Blasting them would probably be bad press. He could actually use their cooperation if at all possible... hmmm. "Mina-chan, put a containment field out, five feet surrounding our group."

Minako grinned and complied, ignoring the slightly hostile looks from Sash and Nuku Nuku. ~Mina-CHAN! He hasn't called me that since he was my pet cat!~

*THWUD!* Despite the golden shimmer in the air, several newscasters flattened themselves against it.

"Continue walking," Ranma instructed his entourage. "Well, gentlemen, i'm not in the habit of granting interviews outside of press conferences. Normally you'd have to discuss any of this with my press secretary here."

Minako blinked when she realized she was being addressed. "H-hai! I mean, Minako Aino. I can be reached at the Chinese Embassy, extension 1214, or at BestChoice@China.gov."

Belle blinked. "Mind you, there are a number of people still unhappy with that choice of e-mail address, Minako-san."

Minako stuck her tongue out. "So says 'TrueFiancee@China.gov' eh?"

"Emperor, just a few questions!"

Ranma located the individual currently shoved up against it. Typical TV News bubblehead from the look of it. "So ask."

"Is it true that you eat political dissidents in your country?" The woman thudded slightly against the forcescreen as jostling for position continued.

"No. Actually i don't eat pork or red meat either. Fish, poultry, veggies, fruits. i think Nuku eats beef though she prefers fish."

"Mmmm. Nuku Nuku like salmon!"

"I eat beef, hamburgers and such," provided Minako. "I think Belle is fond of beef sukiyaki."

The reporters were taken aback for a moment as the realization penetrated that they had a chance to get answers now.

"Why did you conquer China?" "Is it true that you have a harem of hundreds of women?" "What about these rumors of mind control experiments?" "What's the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything?" "Is it true that you are here at the bequest of a Japanese citizen?" "There are rumors that many of your inner staff are Japanese, does this cause friction within your new China?" "What are your plans for this Empire of yours?" "What color underwear are you wearing?"

"Minako, personal note. Write an FAQ file and put it up on our website." Ranma pondered as the questions continued without letup.

Minako nodded and made a note to get a website and whatever a 'effayyque' was.

"One at a time," Belle asked politely. Oddly enough the crowd listened.

"i conquered China because they attacked my good friends here," Ranma indicated Minako. "i will not tolerate this. Many of my staff ARE Japanese, but so far this hasn't caused too much friction though there are language barriers to overcome. My main priority with the Empire is to bring the standard of living up. After which we will terraform and colonize Mars and Venus since nobody else seems interested in that."

There was much staring going on as the crowd of reporters tried to digest that. As intended, they kind of forgot a lot of the other questions they had on hearing of such thing.

"No way." "Impossible." "Can I get a ticket?"

Ranma noted that the bubblehead-looking newsbunny had gone from asking about underwear to tickets on interplanetary travel. Interesting. "Of course, *that* will be after we get the Lagrange Colony operating and the Moon Kingdom started. One must have priorities after all, and the happiness of my people and peaceful expansion of the Empire are linked."

Much staring continued, some of the newshounds dropping out of the crowd in order to scream into their headsets.

"How far along are these plans?" Another newscaster said, just before being trampled.

"The orders given were to proceed with all due speed. It shall be a great project more wondrous than the Great Wall." Ranma smirked. He'd given no such order except for dinner last night, but politicians HAD to do smoke and mirrors.

--------

Shampoo's hair stood on end. "AHHHH! Shampoo thought he talking about dinner!"

"A Lagrange Point orbital space station?" Ami frowned and pulled a few designs from one of Sash's Gundam books. "If we... Rei? Setsuna? Get the others, we've got to work fast. He said 'all due speed'!"

The group of former Moon Princesses smiled. This would be *sure* to get their names bumped up in the queue.

--------

Asgard:

"Belle?" Celeste squeaked.

"Yes?"

After Celeste finished her leap and got her heartrate under control, she looked from the Belldandy clone to the image in the viewfinder. "Oh. That's *another* you there. Let's see. What kind of mess is there in this... Hahn?!"

The goddess Belle looked politely at the scrolling display. "Oh my!" It was somehow appropriate.

>Name: Belle Morisato
>Occupation: Demigoddess (portfolio: Japanese Housewives)
>Family: Keiichi Morisato (father), Belldandy (mother),
>Kikuko Morisato (sister), Thur Morisato (brother),
> Ranma Saotome (fiance)
>Method of transport: not currently available
>Method of recharge: cuddling
>Goddess power specialty: White magic

"So I, I mean Belldandy, married Keiichi-san on one of the worlds he visited." Belle made a note to call Belldandy. She'd probably want to check further on this, see what problems her counterpart encountered, and make plans.

"Wait a minute?! Rei Hino as a Telepath/Telekinetic? Minako Aino's doing mystic forcefields? She's a WHAT?! Ami Mizuno as an archmage? Usagi Tsukino, a ditzy angel? Makoto Kino, COSMO KNIGHT?! Setsuna Meiou's an archmage too? Haruka is a Devilhunter? Michiru is a 'ghost sweeper'? WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?!"

"Ukyo's an efreeti, Shampoo's a marid, Kasumi's a djinni, and Nabiki's a dao." Belle paused with a hmmm. "Would you look at that?"

"He's got girls from... It's 99% stable?!" Celeste blinked and pushed a button. "Amaterasu-sama?"

"You have reached Amaterasu Omikami's voicemail. I'm on another line or away from my desk. Please leave a message about whatever piddling emergency is bothering you after the beep, and if it's a telemarketing call you'll wake up on a lilypad tomorrow morning. Thank you." (BEEP!)

"Dang. Got your voicemail. Ah, this is Celeste. The newly fusioned timeline is showing a high stability rating. We can pull Grey out and backtrack the real Ranma as soon as you get the message. Thanks."

Belle smiled. "Looks like he did it after all."

Celeste blinked and regarded the chaos. "THAT's stable? Okay, I have three backtrack points I can use. How in Yggdrasil is THAT stable?"


Weird Ideas:

All's fun and games when you've just conquered a major nation, however unintentionally you began travelling that road? Not likely. Maybe in ancient times you could get away with it without major repercussions.

Hmmm. A number of other ideas. Chapter 29 pretty much continues this until everything gets wrapped up in Chapter 30. (i hope, that would only be 28 chapters more than i had intended to write.)

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