Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction ❯ A Very Scary Bet ❯ Here's Ranko ( Chapter 2 )

Ukyou looked around the lunchroom. "Well, at least some of the guys aren't attacking us, otherwise this'd look like an all-girls school."

Akane leaned back in her chair. "I don't see why we gotta learn this stuff anyway. It's not like this stuff is gonna be any use in runnin' a dojo."

"Hello girls, and how has your first day been?" Nabiki slid into place next to her sister. For some reason there were a lot of empty seats nearby.

"Lotsa garbage," summed up Akane's view of the day. "Not like this algebra stuff has any practical day to day use. And what possible use is this English stuff unless we take gaijin in at the dojo?" Or if she could go visit Ken, who was SO much better than these...boys. Hmmm. Maybe she *should* pay more attention in class.

"Not much different from school down in Osaka," Ukyou said with a shrug. "Just a bit more violent in the morning and the English teacher knows less than I do about the language..."

"Now, now, Akane, don't be too quick to dismiss the value of an education. Even if you get into running the dojo, there's still those who'll judge you on your education level." Nabiki smirked and started on her obento lunch. "Mrs Saotome may be crazy, but she can really fix an obento, y'know?"

"Yeah, I s'pose. Hey, I can get a portable grill cheap, maybe we could make and sell okonomiyaki during lunch?" A smile lit Ukyou's face. She could do a lot with this sort of setup.

"Good idea," said Nabiki around a mouthful of rice. "There seems to be a few opportunities for making some money around here too. I made some pocket change at the village with little things like my photography skills and bets on various fights and the like. It'd be good to earn our keep in case we gotta move out."

"Why would we do that?" Akane glanced up.

"Uhm, Akane, remember Ranchan?" Ukyou shook her head. "I wonder what he's like nowadays?"

"No telling, and we can't let him meet his mother until we know."

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Ranma glanced over to where Shampoo and this new amazon fiancee were being given a talking to by the Doctor. "K-9?"

"Yes, young Master?"

"I need you to get something out of the TARDIS while the Doctor is occupied."

K-9 processed this for a moment. "Do you mean your temporal transmitter unit? Estimate a 75% chance that the Doctor does know about the unit's existence."

"Last I checked it was still working," Ranma said, apparently still studying the sky. "I made sure the door to the TARDIS was unlocked, so you can get in and out without any problem. If you would be so kind to get it and bring it to the building whose face I am currently spotlighting with the reflection from my wristcomp?"

"Affirmative, young Master." K-9 paused for a moment. "You will remain behind? This unit...will miss all three of you."

"I'll miss you too, K-9, and I know that 'Ranko' will also feel your absence. Shampoo never really got that comfortable around you, did she?" Ranma sighed. "This is my time and my world. It's gonna feel awfully primitive and small, but it won't be unbearable if I can bring my workshop through."

"Affirmative, Master." K-9 trotted off. He would immediately detect the two intruders, but determine that they, like the girl still on board from their last visit, were not a threat to his Master.

Ranma carefully removed his smile. Recreating his workshop with "stone knives and bearskins" would have taken him months. If this worked...

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Genma thought for a moment, then the panda put away his binoculars and thought some more about how he was to do this. He'd finally found Ranma, who hadn't been at the amazon village when he'd checked the last time, but apparently the boy had been on the move.

There was only the one trail that a Japan-bound individual could use to get in and out of the Bayankala range. He could "accidently" find Ranma there and defeat him, thus proving to the boy that he still had a lot to learn about the Anything Goes style.

Then the two could continue on and get the necessary additional training before it became time for the boy to meet his mother and see if he met her standards.

It was a good plan, thought Genma. Perfect. Nothing could go wrong.

Thunder echoed through the mountains, or perhaps it was the laughter of a passing god.

----------------------March 11, 1992----------------------

Ranma waited a full hour after the TARDIS disappeared. Shampoo and Vanilla watched, concerned, as their fiance took a large sack and began pulling rods of some greenish glass and silvery metal out.

"Oh, so you DID get it," Shampoo began.

"What you do, Ranma?" Vanilla finished with a cool glance towards her rival.

"I spent nine months in a world known as RIFTS Earth. Wonderful place, so much to learn there. A bit too violent to live there, but for educational purposes just fine." Ranma glanced back over his shoulder at the two. "Do you have your packs ready? We can go to Japan very soon if this works."

"Yes, Vanilla, you go get. Shampoo keep eye on airen."

The albino's gaze flicked back and forth between Shampoo and Ranma for a moment, then she gave a barely perceptible nod. She jogged back to her home, knowing that her adopted mother would count on her to behave in a manner proper for an amazon while she was gone. With some degree of dignity, and some purely gratuitous violence. (No one would expect gratuitous sex from either of them.)

"Airen? Did you remember pack Shampoo's cycle?" Shampoo grinned at the memory. Most machines she had no use for, but there was something about her own hovercycle, wind flying past her, a powerful engine thrumming between her legs. Shampoo shifted a little bit as she remembered that feeling. It had been even faster than her cursed form.

"Yeah," Ranma was now fitting the rods together in what was taking shape as a very large rectangular outline. "Mind you, it won't last long here without some work. Your Tengu powerarmor was the tricky one to store. Space limitations, so I hadda disassemble the wings pretty thoroughly."

Ranma fitted the last rod into place and started attaching a large boxlike device to one end of the rectangle. "Anyway, I COULD spend a lot of time putting together little bits of technology so that I could eventually work with the really nifty stuff, OR I could try to sneak in some stuff."

"Shampoo remember."

Ranma flipped a switch on the box and stepped back. A sparkling glow began to fill the rectangle. Shampoo involuntarily took two steps back, though she was well clear of it. Ever since that transmat device had removed her curse and given her a nasty set of cramps, she'd been leary of devices of this sort.

Shampoo watched as first the general shape, then the details began to form on the vehicle.

Vanilla came jogging back, two large packs in her hands, when she saw the shape forming in the air. She raised an eyebrow, indicating her astonishment at this newest development.

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The Doctor looked up as something fairly large moved through time. "That boy really needs to learn subtlety."

"Affirmative, Master." K-9 quite agreed. "Master, I have checked the condition of that girl that you and the young Master saved earlier from the world with the invaders. She has now spent 72.385 hours within the healing capsule."

"Odd genetic structure, that girl." The Doctor tugged unconciously at his scarf. "Very odd. Human DNA, and I'm not sure what the rest of it was."

"There was an unforeseen side effect, Master." K-9 processed the remote data for an extra five seconds, making absolutely sure of what the sensors were telling him. "The girl has regressed in age. Current age is approximately nine terrestrial years."

"Get her out, then, the remaining injuries will have to heal on their own." The Doctor frowned. "Any data on that 'entry plug' that she was found in?"

"Highly sophisticated biomechanical interface, though unrefined. Certainly more than one would expect for Terran technology circa 2015."

"Yes, yes. When humans believe themselves cornered they can surprise you with their inventiveness." The Doctor's eyes widened. "He wouldn't! Oh my."

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Shampoo grinned as a 30x20x15 area became filled with something she hadn't seen in over a week.

"(SHAMPOO, that? is what)"

"Is transportation. Is airen's workshop."

"If everything goes well." Ranma watched with a grin, hoping.

The glow flickered to a stop and a massive weight settled onto the ground on thick legs. A few creaks and and clanks could be heard as the box sat there, smoke coming off of its outer surfaces.

Shampoo and Vanilla tore their eyes away from the box to watch Ranma doing cartwheels and laughing.

"Shampoo?"

"Yes, Vanilla?"

"Airen is...very strange."

"If too strange for Vanilla, should give up now, Shampoo take up burden of being tai tai to airen."

"Well," Vanilla said after a moment, "at least he not boring..."

"That true." Shampoo hid her disappointment. If she couldn't get rid of Vanilla, how could she hope to deal with the OTHER fiancees?

"Shampoo, Vanilla," Ranma palmed a panel on the box and a pair of steps extruded from the bottom. A door hissed open at the top of those steps. "Your carriage awaits. Stow your packs and grab a chair while I dismantle the chrono beacon."

"What language he speak now, Shampoo?"

"Is called technobabble. Shampoo not fluent in that. Special language for engineer types." Shampoo shrugged. Who could figure males anyway?

Vanilla started moving towards the steps, but Shampoo entered first, wanting to confirm that airen had packed her hovercycle.

Ranma whistled a happy little tune, gathering up the network of rods he had set out earlier. He didn't have to go back to stone knives and bearskins! Laser welders, fusion packs, molecular seamers, sensor suites, Shampoo's hovercycle!

A shriek from within the transport ended his pleasant fantasy. Barely a second later, Shampoo flew down the steps and turned to unleash a rapidfire stream of Mandarin that didn't sound at all pleasant.

"Airen!" Shampoo found him. "Chair grab me! You tell chair not to grab amazon womans!"

"Huh?" Ranma blinked. "Oh, you mean the restraint harness engaged?"

Shampoo looked at her airen, being able to tell she was not going to get any sympathy out of him. "Ranma, you know how Shampoo feel about machines that move around without being asked."

"I know. You never would use that teaching machine after that first time."

Shampoo pouted. She'd practiced this in the mirror and knew the picture she was presenting to her airen. Let's see Vanilla top this!

"Oh, Ranma," came Vanilla's voice. "What mean this flashing light?"

"Don't touch ANYTHING!" Ranma grabbed up the last rod and ran into the vehicle.

Shampoo held the cute pout for a heartbeat then gave a disgusted noise. "Why? How did Shampoo offend goddess? Shampoo want attention from airen! Do she get? No! Don't want attention from stupid Mousse. So Mousse always pester Shampoo. Urrr....."

"You coming, Shampoo?" Ranma stuck his head out.

Shampoo looked up at Ranma, sighed, then put on a happy face. "Coming right away, airen! You tell chair only airen allowed hug Shampoo?"

The door whished shut behind Shampoo, standing in the dimly lit area where Vanilla was already strapped into a seat, and Ranma was sitting in another seat. Shampoo made a face. She understood that her hovercycle needed to be unpacked and made ready, but she didn't care much for being enclosed like this. Riding free on a hovercycle, the wind in her hair, THAT was something Shampoo could deal with.

Shampoo sat as close to Ranma as she could looking at all the colored screens around her in distaste. Too many bells and whistles. Shampoo preferred a minimal amount of clutter and a smooth interface.

A clanking noise came from the door. "(SHAMPOO! Shampoo! I love you! You've returned to me.)"

"Is there way to lock door, airen?"

"Hmm. Oh, just push this button."

"Thank you." Shampoo pushed the indicated button which flashed twice after being pressed. "Stupid Mousse!"

Ranma's eyes swept the control board. "Atomic batteries to power..." The lcd gauge read that the batteries had just brought the fusion plant online and it was putting out enough power. Ranma pushed another button, throwing energy into the hoverjet system. "Turbines to speed..."

Shampoo gripped her chair as she felt the box shake. "Maybe some damage to thrusters? Shampoo put contra-grav engines on standby."

"No windows?" Vanilla's quiet voice somehow managed to cover Mousse's startled squawk from outside the vehicle.

Ranma hit another switch and several screens around the seating area flared to life. He frowned and one of the views changed so that it was looking down near the doorway.

Mousse, hanging from a chain that had gotten tangled on one of the steps, was currently fumbling for his fallen glasses. Said glasses were continuing to fall as the boxy vehicle continued to rise.

"What is that moron doing?" Ranma stared at the monitor.

Mousse fumbled around in one sleeve, then started checking another, still trying to find a pair of glasses. Unfortunately all this jerking around on the chain finally got it loose. Mousse fell. "(SHAMPOOOOOOOOOOO!)"

Shampoo clapped her hands twice and began rubbing them together. She'd seen Ukyou do this a few times. "Very bad for you, Mousse, very bad you fall in spring. Terrible tragic story. So, airen, where we go?"

"Can you make a recording of this?" Vanilla asked with some minor degree of interest. Mousse had managed to annoy even her.

Ranma tapped the auto-track control, zooming the monitor so that Mousse's fall could be followed. As Mousse hit the water and was submerged. All three watched as the water was broken a moment later by the Jusenkyo Guide using a net to fish something out of the spring.

"He fall into spring of drowned bat?" Shampoo smiled. "Maybe now he leave Shampoo alone, find nice batgirl?"

Vanilla nodded silently. That had a certain symmetry to it. She liked symmetry. She'd especially like not being mistaken for Shampoo by Mousse on a regular basis.

"Well, at least he's OK." Ranma pushed forward on one joystick and the ship began moving forward. "Vanilla, can you see me from where you are?"

"Yes," Vanilla acknowledged. This was why she'd chosen a seat behind and to the side from the pilot's chair.

"Good, I'm going to go over the controls just in case either of you ever need to pilot it. There's a voice interface, but it's programmed for English, which neither of you know."

"Shampoo just want know how to recharge hovercycle."

"( English. with familiarity vague some have)" Vanilla responded in that language. She had noticed that most of the controls and displays were in English. The little smiley faces for status indicators were a bit...odd, however.

"Good. You'll be a great backup pilot."

Vanilla twitched. There was something disturbing about that comment. She was immediately lost in thought as she tried to figure out why.

Ranma engaged the stealth systems as they cleared the mountains. No reason to take chances, after all.

----------------March 13, 1992------------------

Ranma glanced down at the beeping display. "Oooh. Lookit that. Reading some really odd power readings there."

Vanilla looked up from where she'd been going over an owner's manual, translating it for Shampoo's benefit. "How is it odd?"

"Biological in nature, I think." Ranma tapped a few controls. "Hang on, I'm gonna get closer and get a better look." It meant dropping the stealth field, but it was interfering with the sensors to leave it running...

"Vanilla, what mean this?" Shampoo pointed to the drawing then to the corresponding part of the machine.

"It means that the halberd draws enough power that you can't use the Stealth function while it is engaged." Vanilla tried to explain.

Shampoo nodded. "Flying power armor, spears, amazons. Some things just meant to be."

Vanilla was glad that Shampoo was familiar with this hightech stuff. Vanilla wondered how it was that she seemed to be as well.

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"Thank you, spy, you have served me well." Herb, prince of the Musk, stood. "Do you realize what this means?"

"That some redhaired girl is engaged to some purple haired girl?"

Herb slapped Mint, using a martial arts manuever he saw on one of those 3 Stooges tapes he'd recently gotten. "The Knucklehead nose slap," he thought it was called.

"It means," continued Herb, "that Ranko once again walks the same lands as I. Mint, get the Dipping Ladle!"

"Yes, your eminence!"

Herb smirked and furled his cape in true villain showmanship. At least he hoped it was, that was the effect he was trying for. "Soon, Ranko, I shall show that upstart Saffron up by claiming you for myself!"

The spy, forgotten for a moment, made a note of this speech and proceeded immediately towards Phoenix Mountain. Yuan would make Nabiki proud of her pupil.

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"This is Go Sakurai, Action Five News Traffic. The traffic buildup along Gojira Road is even worse than usual tonight, due to a rollover accident on..."

Something Big and Fast shot by the Action Five copter. Go blinked. It looked like a Winnebago. He'd seen those covering baseball training camp in Yuma Arizona. Winnebagos generally had wheels, this hadn't. Go blinked again. Winnebagos also generally weren't found travelling over a hundred feet above the road.

"Ufo," Go breathed, saying it as if it were a single word. "A ufo..."

"Ufo..." breathed the pilot, who blinked a couple of times himself.

"AFTER IT!" The two newshounds shouted in unison. This was it, their big break, a national feed at the very least! No more going to Yuma to cover training camp! Yippee! No more camping trips in Ryugenzawa!

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"She's back?!?" The child named Saffron's eyes gleamed. "At last, my beloved, now I may conquer your heart..."

Kiima made a face. Ick. Well, if she married Ranma first, then Saffron wouldn't pursue this any further. Which would be best for all concerned...

She briefly lost herself in memory of a few years back. The plague spread by those cowardly creatures that had teleported into Phoenix Mountain, hoping to tap into Jusendo for their own purposes. How a young boy and this man called the Doctor had come in and saved all of them.

She especially remembered how she had been dying of the fever, and of waking to find the young boy replacing the cool cloths covering her again. Again and again she awoke, and if he hadn't been at her side, he had been close.

Kiima sighed. She'd still been unsteady on her feet when they had left, but now she had a chance to show her gratitude to the Doctor's apprentice.

-------------------------------------------

"Oh my gosh, look at that!" Tenchi stared at the television. This caused the fight between Aeka and Ryoko to break up. What was Tenchi finding so fascinating?

"Hmmm. A hoverjet vehicle, fairly advanced model, at least Galactic standard." Washu studied the boxlike shape depicted on the television. "Doesn't look like a familiar model, though. Might be a homebuilt."

"Wow!" Mihoshi exclaimed. "Could it be an Earth ship?"

"Too advanced, but that does look like English lettering on the side." Washu brought her holographic keyboard up and began to make interrogative noises as she typed. "Hmm. I think it just might be a homebuilt."

"Ohmygosh!" Tenchi repeated, even more intrigued. "It's the Sailor Senshi!"

"Hmmm?" Ryoko looked at the scantily clad young girls fighting some large creature in a park setting. "What's a Sailor Senshi?"

"Earth's guardian warriors against ancient recurrent evil, similar to the Warrior Blades of Taikei or the Righteous Ronin of Tau Prime." Washu's fingers were really flying now as she attempted to analyze the data available to her. She made a note to launch a few sensor probes in the Tokyo area for future studies.

"Oh," said Ryoko, Aeka, Kiyone, Mihoshi, and Sasami in an eerie unison.

Ryoko noted the way that Tenchi was staring at these "Senshi." So he liked these sailorsuited warrior types, did he? Well, those Righteous Ronin were kind of interesting, if a bit humorless. Hmmmm.

Aeka smirked. So Lord Tenchi admired these warriors of "love and justice" as was only natural of him. Clearly the nobility of their cause was not lost on him, and this gave her an idea.

Kiyone frowned. If they were like the Warrior Blades, then they were acting as vigilantes but were upholding the laws and morals of their society. As a member of the Galaxy Police, she was to assist the Blades if her path crossed theirs. Wouldn't this hold true for these "Senshi?"

Mihoshi grinned. Such pretty uniforms!

Sasami smiled. It reminded her of that dream she had. Maybe Tsunami could help her out with something. This could be major cool!

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"Hmmm." Ranma strapped a harness around himself, then fitted something like a leash between it and an eyebolt near the vehicle's door.

"What you do, Ranma?" Shampoo looked at the external monitors then back to her airen.

Vanilla looked a bit more closely at the monitor. "Two of those girls are using Anything Goes martial arts stances..."

Shampoo blinked and looked closer herself. "Aiya. You right. Tall girl in green and short girl in blue use very basic defensive stance. Might not be Anything Goes though, as style take in other styles as part of itself."

"No, she's right." Ranma tested the leash connections. "More to the point, I don't recognize the two girls, but I DO recognize the way they're moving. There's a couple of girls Nabiki sold 'fiancee cards' to back when I thought it just meant I'd be training 'em for free."

"Shampoo remember. Airen a little slow back then." Shampoo nodded with a slight frown.

Ranma made a face. "Anyway, if they're who I think they are, then I gotta help 'em out."

"What you think you..." Shampoo stopped. It had become rather obvious what Ranma was going to do. "But that should be Shampoo's job."

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"Look out, Mars!"

Sailor Mars barely avoided the thing's lunge. "Fire soul!"

"It seems to be immune to our special attacks," Ami noted. "Mars' fire and Jupiter's lightning don't seem to have much effect."

"It's too fast," complained Sailor Moon. "It won't stay still long enough for any of my attacks."

"I...WHAT THE HECK?!" Sailor Jupiter pointed up.

The Senshi and the youma all looked up to see a rather large box hanging in midair in just the way boxes were not supposed to.

Ami frowned, a hover jet system? But it was so quiet she could barely hear it when she was listening for it.

A door opened in the side, and a figure leaned out. "How dare you menace such valiant warriors? I send you back to hell with the Anything Goes final attack!"

"Anything Goes?!" Makoto's jaw dropped. It couldn't be. No, it COULD be! She still had her membership card somewhere.

Ami blinked and brought her visor to magnify. It WAS! She'd have to see if she still had her membership card.

Ranma pointed a dull black cylinder at the youma who responded by snarling and preparing to uproot a tree to throw at the vehicle. "Behold a final technique so feared that the Coalition States has banned its use in their territories!" Ranma turned on the cylinder, which activated the turret it was slaved to. "Saotome special technique! 'Nuke it till it glows!'"

A gatling particle beam spoke from the undercarriage of the hovervehicle.

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"Saotome?!" The man rubbed his chin, which was badly in need of a shave. He stared at the televised picture of a futuristic vehicle, no doubt built by someone nearly as much of a genius as he was himself... How he'd love to go over the schematics!

He grabbed a card from a pile of knick knacks accumulated over the years, remembering a pledge at a frat party years ago. His daughter would marry the son of a his old buddy, named Genma Saotome. Years later, he'd gotten the card with a note about how it was too bad that he didn't have a daughter...

But now he did.

"Atsuko!" She didn't answer. "Nuku nuku!"

"Yes, papa?"

"We've got plans for this weekend after all."

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Nodoka blinked among all the excitement. The daughters Tendo were whooping, and young Miss Kuonji was all but bouncing up and down in glee.

Ranma? Could this figure who brought thunder down from the heavens to fight alongside the Sailor Senshi be HER son?!

He was surrounded by young girls. But, was he doing it in a manly fashion?

-----------------------------------

Sailor Moon dropped her moon scepter.

Tuxedo Mask, ready to intervene, let the rose drop from his hand as he stared.

Sailor Mercury clucked and began working out the various readings relayed to her from her visor.

Sailor Jupiter looked from the vehicle to what remained of the target and wondered if she could get one of those.

Sailor Mars rubbed her ears and really wished that she hadn't rushed forward when she saw that the youma had been distracted. She filed this under "Things That You Now Know Better Than To Do."

The News 5 helicopter crew merely filmed the smouldering crater with its evaporating bits of youma, and noted aloud that the Senshi's new ally had a little problem with overkill.

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Brianna Diggers blinked. She blinked again. "Guns. Big guns. Oooo. That looks like a rocket launcher on that side."

"Sailor Senshi with rocket launchers?" Brittany looked up. "That sounds just SO wrong."

"Naw, it's a guy." Little hearts appeared in Brianna's eyes. "A guy who comes with gatling particle beam toting weapons platforms! My kinda guy!"

"That does appear to be a fairly sophisticated craft," Gina noted, the tablet in her hands temporarily forgotten. "Interesting, the design of those jets...hmmmm."

Brittany looked back and forth between her two sisters. "Aw c'mon, that guy looks like he's still in high school!"

"So maybe he's got an older brother," Brianna cracked her knuckles. Yup, she just HAD to meet this guy. They had so much in common. She'd show him her rocket launchers if he'd show her that cannon.

Gina smiled. That vehicle, she'd love to have a go over its systems.

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Washu stared at the television. So did Kiyone.

"How did he get a particle beam cannon of that intensity onto such a small ship?" Washu demanded to know, not that she really expected an answer. She could do it, obviously, but someone of this planet doing it was more than a little surprising. They HAD to be of this planet, no one else would have a bumpersticker in English that stated "Daleks suck for spare change" or one in Japanese that read "If you can read this, you're in firing range."

"Discharging megawatt cannon in a restricted zone," grumbled Kiyone. "I've gotta have a talk with that boy."

Nobody noticed that Aeka, Ryoko, and Sasami had snuck off. This would be regretted later.

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Queen Beryl felt one of those large sweatdrops move down the back of her head.

"Milady, these life energy readings..." Zoicite grinned. "There is enough life energy being radiated from that ship to put our plans ahead by weeks!"

"Zoicite, get me everything you can on whatever a 'Saotome' is." She had a bad feeling about this, a very scary feeling.

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"Stealth systems, active. Chameleon mode active. ECM on." Ranma checked the telltales. Anyone looking from outside would have seen the large boxlike vehicle shimmer and turn transparent. "Now if I just knew where the Tendo dojo was..."

Vanilla held up a map. "Nabiki sell me this for three pillowcases and a comforter."

"Sound like Nabiki," Shampoo said with a nod. "Shampoo show Vanilla her power armor. Is too too cool!"

"Ah, next stop, the Tendo dojo." Ranma clicked on a computer enhanced map.

"Airen," Shampoo said. "Next time you let Shampoo do shooting, yes?"

"Sure, Shampoo, 'a woman's place is at the controls of a weapons console.'" Ranma nodded, quoting something Shampoo had said months ago.

Shampoo grinned, not recognizing the quote. "Airen say such sweet things!"

Behind them, a news chopper began looking for the odd ship which had abruptly vanished.

--------------------------------

"So, let's see what you've learned." The impending arrival of Ranma (their fiance) had finally brought to a head the question of who the better fighter was.

Nabiki had fought Ukyou. Nabiki's clothes had developed a number of spatula cuts, while Ukyou's had developed similar cuts from a number of cards. Ukyou had proven to be better of the two, though it had been agreed that Nabiki pulling an all-nighter for a tough test earlier that day had probably not performed at her best. Akane had proven to be a better fighter than Ukyou. And now...

Akane nodded. "For two lunches."

"The bet was for one lunch." Kasumi sighed. The winner got to make the lunch in question.

"No holding back, you guys." Ukyou looked to the two combatants. "Well, at least not much." She swung the spatula down, signalling the beginning of the match.

"Hurricane Kick," Akane began one of her flashier moves, specifically because she didn't want her older sister to hold back anything.

Kasumi ducked under the kick and stabbed up at Akane's leg with one finger as her younger sister passed overhead.

Akane landed and frowned as she turned back to her sister. "C'mon Kasumi, fight me for real!"

"If you insist, Akane," Kasumi said with some reluctance.

Ukyou partially turned to Nabiki. "Yup, guess Kasumi's won this one."

"She should _never_ have closed with her," Nabiki shook her head. "Akane remains impulsive."

"Hey guys, I'm still fighting here!" Akane looked somewhat angrily at her other sister and Ukyou.

Kasumi tapped Akane on the back of the head, then flipped back lazily.

"Hey! That's not fair! I wasn't ready!" Akane frowned. Well, she hadn't wanted to use a chi attack against her own sister, but this would at least demonstrate her skills. "HADOKEN!"

"No, Akane! Don't use that NOW!"

Kasumi's panicked look was enough to clue both Nabiki and Ukyou in. Nabiki started looking for a bucket.

Ukyou watched as Akane's hands went back into the position for the chi-fireball attack, then locked in place. "Akane, let go of the fireball. Let it go."

Akane knew she was in trouble at this point, and tried but wasn't able to simply dissipate the attack. "Uhm, Kasumi, could you unlock me before this explodes?"

Kasumi was already jabbing at a series of pressure points. "Hang on, Akane."

Akane aimed the hadoken straight up. Her sister had won this round, but she'd not make that mistake again in the NEXT match. The blue fireball roared away towards the sky.

CLANG!

"Clang?" Ukyou looked up.

"Clang?" Nabiki repeated, her eyes widening as connections were made.

"Akane, I think we ought to move," Kasumi said, walking towards the patio.

"I gotta bad feeling about this," said Akane. She wondered if she should call Ken. Just to make sure he'd gotten back to America all right. Or would that be too much too soon? She didn't want to seem pushy or nothin'.

A shape started shimmering into solidity as the hoverjets shut down and another drive system went active.

The shape filled the backyard, with a pair of jets hanging down over the koi pond.

"Well, that explains WHY he did it," Nabiki noting this with a nod. "Not HOW, but certainly why."

"Did what?" Akane sat down to watch this, accepting a cup of tea from Mrs Saotome. She'd been writing Ken for the past two years, but she wanted to hear his voice again.

"No rockets, no propellors, no jets," Ukyou noted. "Antigravity?"

Nabiki nodded, wondering just what kind of goodies she could get her hands on here. Whoever ended up marrying Ranma would have access to all that high tech and the sort of profits one could bring in.

Ukyou looked over the odd boxy ship. She wondered if her Ranchan had been eating enough.

Kasumi watched Mrs Saotome with some concern. Would she require immediate satisfaction?

The door on the vehicle hissed open just as Akane was getting ready to comment on the English lettering on the side. Whatever a "Winnebago" was...

A bouncy Chinese Amazon...uhm...bounced out of the ship. "Kasumi! Nabiki! Ukyou! Oh, yes, violent tomboy..."

Akane pulled down her right lower eyelid and stuck out her tongue, the Japanese "redeye." She was glad to see the amazon too...

The next one down the steps was unhurried and nodded once to Nabiki.

"Vanilla," said Nabiki for everyone else's benefit. "Good to see you made it." She had some clothes that needed mending after sparring with Ukyou.

Ranma stood at the doorway, having put on his floppy hat and extra long scarf, red kevlar duster-style coat looking particularly nice with the souvenier patches on the sleeves. "Dantooine" proclaimed one. "DS9" proclaimed another. "Jurai Freeport" declared a third. "San Diego Zoo" read a fourth. He wanted to make a grand entry. "Airen!" Nabiki exclaimed happily, drawing strange looks from Shampoo and Vanilla.

"Oh, hey, Ranma," said Akane, still debating whether she should call Ken or not. Maybe if she did but made it sound like she had dialed the number by accident...

"Ranchan!" Ukyou said in midleap.

Kasumi noted the collision shortly to be taking place and continued to watch Ranma's mother. She was uncertain about the expression. How were they to tell if Ranma would pass or not before she did?

"RANCHAN!" Ukyou managed a flying tackle that would have done an NFL linebacker proud.

"So, Akane, you get over problem with poisonous cooking?"

"Hah, just you wait, you barbarian, I'll show you! I'll show all of you!"

The two girls shared a laugh.

"Is almost like old times."

"Yeah, I missed you too, you bimbo."

Nodoka's eyes flicked back and forth. "Why do you two trade insults back and forth like that when you're obviously glad to see each other?"

Akane spoke up first. "Uncle Genma told us all about that. You've got to insult and belittle people to show you care for them."

Nodoka blinked, her eyes sweeping around the crowd. "...but Kasumi and Ukyou..."

"Oh, we just got in the habit to please him. Some of us knew better." Ukyou said in a cheerful voice, leading Ranma in by the hand. She was with her Ranchan, all was right with the world. The rest of Nerima might have been overcast, but as far as she was concerned there was sunlight beaming down on her and little bluebirds fluttering about.

"I...see." Nodoka nodded, fingering her silk-wrapped bundle. "So Dearest explained how such things work to you..."

---------------------------

Thousands of miles away, a certain heavyset man looked up from a hot cup of mulled wine and shivered at the premonition of Doom which had befallen him. Figuring that he knew where it had originated, Genma gave thanks that he was, in fact, thousands of miles away.

But where was Ranma? Shouldn't he have been trudging along by now?

---------------------------

"Son," Nodoka closed the door, cutting off the following young girls. "We must have a talk now."

"Yeah? Good. I don't see why it has to be private, though, me and the girls shared everything when we were on the trail."

"Everything?" Nodoka said, pausing as if considering something for a moment. "Now, son, I hear you wouldn't even look at these girls..."

"Oh yeah, right. Who'd you hear THAT from, Akane? 'Look at 'em', heck for a couple of weeks there, I was riding 'em! Had to look at 'em then just to hold on, didn't I?"

Nodoka blinked, somehow making a little squeegee noise as she did so. "Well, er, yes. That WOULD be appropriate. So, uhm, you 'rode' these young ladies before you all were separated?"

Ranma thought back, the memories bringing a smile to his face. "Oh yeah. Heck all the time then. They were all riding me or I was riding them, if we didn't have to tend the cart or be training in the martial arts. Heck, I rode Kasumi for most of a day and a night there once!"

Nodoka's knees threatened to give out. She misinterpreted the wistful grin and distant look on her son's face. Could it be? "You...and...Kasumi?"

"Yeah. That was cool, I think Kasumi hadda be one of the best cause she was so gentle and just made me feel all warm and fuzzy when I'd lean into her."

Nodoka blinked again. "Oh my."

"Shampoo was cool too, when we flew together, oh that was thoroughly neat. You wouldn't think it, but she's really light, so her weight when she rode me was hardly any deal. And she gets going really quick, y'know?"

Nodoka pulled out a paper fan and began fanning herself. "My. And you say you rode the others?"

"Yeah, pretty much. Nabiki rode me a couple of times, but that wasn't much special, though SHE got a kick out of it. Kodachi was fun, but a little scary, y'know." Ranma shook his head, riding the tiger had been a really nerve-wracking experience and he'd been trying to convince himself that she wasn't really a cat all through the ordeal.

"Akane was a little tricky, just getting my legs around her at the time was a pain, but interesting. I mean she's just solid muscle, and feeling the way she flexed and moved was really different from any of the others." Ranma paused, wondering why his mother had turned that strawberry color. "Ucchan was great, though. When we flew together, or she rode me, it was almost kinda poetic at times. We just seemed to move naturally together, y'know?"

Nodoka sniffled. "Oh, Ranma, how MANLY you were. And at such a young age, too."

"Huh?"

At that point Ukyou interrupted the discussion by falling through the door, laughing uncontrollably.

Neither Ranma nor Nodoka understood the "private joke" that Ukyou referred to.

------------------------------------

Nabiki listened to the discussion, to the whispered explanations and speculations, and realized she'd have to move soon. They'd had two years to come to some decisions regarding how to handle this.

She was NOT inclined to let her dear (though really slow on some things) brother/fiance die a meaningless death because his mother would consider his virginity (she considered this to be almost completely certain based on her analysis of his personality profile to date) to be a fate deserving death.

Nabiki was not a warrior, though she could hold her own. She had some skill in Anything Goes, as well as in Amazonian Wu Shu. However, her strengths were in some of the other skills she had learned in her time in the village. Herbcraft, alchemy, shiatsu, and the secret techniques of the Chinese Amazons (as opposed to the Norwegian, South American, or Polynesian tribes) were Nabiki's favored weapons.

She'd decided over a year ago on a course of action and had been carefully preparing the ingredients. The rarer ingredients had only recently gotten to her, and Yuan could still be counted on to send her the sort of thing that could only be gotten from the Amazons.

Once Nabiki had put together the proper formula, there remained the question of administering it, and one final question.

Then she'd have to decide who would tame the wild horse. A smirk appeared on her face as she pondered the possibilities.

--------------------------------

Shampoo considered. If she hadn't sworn that she wouldn't use mind-altering substances on Ranma, she knew the little bottle of pills she'd picked up on Phase World would take care of some stupid "man among men" pledge.

(Shampoo also thought that was a pretty stupid thing anyway. Now if it had been a pledge to be a woman among women, she could see it as at least a worthy goal. Or, if it had been a "man among women" - well, Ranma would have qualified as that quite handily.)

Shampoo smiled. SHE had promised not to use magic potions or the like on Ranma. That didn't mean she couldn't get someone ELSE to use the pills, did it?

-----------------------------------

Ukyou held her stomach, which was still fairly sore from realizing that two completely different conversations had been taking place between Ranma and his mother.

Ukyou blinked. Waitaminute. She'd bet, even with Shampoo spending all that time around Ranma, that Ranma still hadn't done IT. This could be a fatal thing with his mother's weird attitude.

It was the work of a moment to realize what had to be done, and who would do it. Ukyou grinned at the thought. No, she had to make this sacrifice for Ranma's sake.

A vision rose in Ukyou's head, of Ranma head thrown back in passion as she rode...

"Ukyou? Are you okay? You look a little feverish."

Ukyou blinked. "Oh, heh heh. Sorry, I was just thinking about something, Kasumi."

Kasumi nodded and turned back to her own contemplation. If she hit those three shiatsu points, hmmm. She might be able to get Ranma past this difficult point in his life.

----------------------------------

"(MASTERS' Residence.)"

"(HELLO, is. Tendo Akane This there? Ken Is)" She'd decided that sending letters wasn't enough. Today she would CALL him.

"Ah, Tendo-san, Master Ken has spoken of you and his other training partner." The butler's voice was accented but otherwise passable in his Japanese.

Akane all but shot off sparks. Ken had spoken of her! Little hearts floated all around her.

"He's out with his girlfriend Eliza at the moment. Do you want to leave a message?"

Little hearts crashed to the ground with the sound of glass breaking. Akane stared at the betraying and now crumpled telephone. "Girlfriend?"

"Gee, Akane, some of us might want to use the phone ourselves." Nabiki shook her head, wondering once again if Akane was really related to her. It was something she'd wondered about since their reunion.

"His girlfriend?" Akane carefully put the crumpled receiver back on its cradle. "His girlfriend Eliza. He's out with his girlfriend Eliza."

Vanilla pondered the young girl standing by the phone and shook her head. She quickly crossed over to Akane and gently put a hand on her shoulder. "You need to stake claim on male, that way no one take what is your property. Otherwise someone else just come along and pffffttt! You end up watching YOUR property go off with other womans."

Akane blinked and regarded the redeyed amazon in front of her.

Vanilla nodded. "Is way of warrior, to strike fast, strike hard, make intentions plain. Seize moment!"

Akane rolled her eyes. "This is Japan, not the Amazon village, you just don't do things that way here."

Vanilla regarded Akane, cocking her head to the side. "You no tell boyfriend you interested. Now other girl stake claim. What part of this no apply?"

Akane blinked and looked down. She blinked again, then moved off silently, deep in thought.

Vanilla nodded, satisfied that she had reached her sister warrior. If only she could solve her own problems that easily.

-------------------------------

"So, Kasumi," Shampoo sat next to her "sister" and regarded the big pile of parts that Ranma was unloading. "Cured or suppressed?"

"Altered. You?" Kasumi allowed a slight smile to cross her face.

"Cured." Shampoo smiled as she saw what it was that Ranma was putting together.

"I only transform into a unicorn now during the full moon." Kasumi shrugged. "It's a lot more predictable and liveable. As you've discovered, I'm sure, it's easier to alter or suppress the Jusenkyo curses than eliminate them entirely."

Shampoo nodded. "Was on space station. Using device called 'transmat' which move you from one place to another. Other end blow up. Shampoo stuck in between until airen save Shampoo, override controls and put Shampoo back together again. When put back together, Shampoo no have curse."

"Ukyou has control of her curse. For the most part." Kasumi watched her "little brother" putting together a vehicle that looked like it had pieces of motorcycle and pieces of jet mixed up. "I changed mine through an ancient ritual dealing with some ancient moon worshippers.

"Nabiki suppresses hers through a bracelet. It works MOST of the time, she says." Kasumi smiled.

"Ranma have something similar, except he just work at repelling accidental splashings."

Kasumi nodded. "Well, we HAVE had these curses for awhile, of course we'd all find ways to work around them. Akane mentioned something about using some ancient chi ritual to suppress her own change."

"Airen's cure no work that well. It deflect splashes accidental in nature. No work against deliberate."

"Wait till his mother's away, then we can find out what Ranko is like." Kasumi exchanged a mischievous glance with Ukyou. It wouldn't be BORING, that was for sure.

------------------------------

Ranma set the power cord up, clicked the battery switch to charge, and allowed himself a moment of rest.

Shampoo REALLY loved her hovercycle.

The sudden loss of flight ability after her transmat accident had left the Amazon looking for some alternative. The Tengu powerarmor was faster, but the NG-300 "Speedster" they'd gotten from that chop-shop recruiter (who would likely think twice before attacking an Amazon in powerarmor again) was Shampoo's favorite.

Small, manueverable, capable of a top speed of 220mph, with a ceiling of 120ft, and very responsive. It had required some repairs during the period that Shampoo had learned to use it, but she had gotten that determined look in her eyes and Ranma knew better than to get in Shampoo's way when she had her back up like that.

Of course, he wanted to add just a few improvements. Little tweaks here and there. He'd wait for her birthday and surprise her by upgrading the laser or something.

He'd just finished tightening the frame when he was swept up by five feet of enthusiastic amazon.

----------------------------------------------

The Jusenkyo Guide placed the young fruit bat in a safe place before running out to see another young man wandering dangerously close to the springs. "Oh sir, you not want go there, is very dangerous!"

"Where the hell am I now?" Ryouga turned around. "What kind of place is this?"

"This very terrible, very cursed area known as Jusenkyo. Over one hundred spring here, each with own terrible tragic story."

"Jusenkyo? It's real? So this is where Ranma and Shampoo got cursed." Ryouga wondered if maybe that meant that the village Shampoo had spoken of was around here as well.

"Sir, you come away from cursed spring before you..."

"Oh no, sir, you fall in very terrible, very cursed spring of drowned..." The Guide wasn't sure how to translate that into Japanese. He took a deep breath and decided to go with just a literal translation. "Yellow little pudgy kind of squirrel-fox kind of creature that fall out of hole in sky caused by two ancient magicians dueling!"

Ryouga looked down at himself, over at the Guide, and very distinctly said "Piii KA!"

The Guide blinked. "Not sure what it is. Short version is Spring-of-Drowned-Otherdimensional-Critter-Number-Three."

"Pika..." The little yellow critter sighed. "Pika?!"

"Yes. Have mirror, just one moment sir."

Upon being presented with the mirror, Ryouga sniffled. All shojo manga fantasy characters had some insufferably cute pet sidekick. He strongly resembled exactly that sort of thing. "PiiKA!"

Ryouga sniffled again and looked at those sparkly eyes, that squirrelish looking crooked tail, that plump body. Oh, the shame, the horror.

----------------------------

Tatewaki Kuno sneezed, then eyed his "troops" for the morning assault. THIS time, he would have his goddesses. After two years of failure, he would have them.

"You know your mission," he informed the kendo team. "You know the prize. We shall not accept defeat. We shall not accept anything less than total and complete victory, shall we?"

"But sir, this isn't exactly regulation..."

Kuno eyed the subordinate with a gaze that suggested contempt. "My travels did suggest that unusual problems require unusual solutions. The warrior uses what tools can be found to grant victory over any obstacles."

"Yes, but..."

"SASUKE!"

"Yes, Master Kuno?"

"These devices, do they perform as advertised?"

"They've never been tested, Master Kuno. I just had them built today. Per your orders, I found a promising individual who put these together."

"Excellent, Sasuke. Tomorrow, then, we shall enjoy victory and these women shall be freed of whatever illusion that keeps them from the side of the great Tatewaki Kuno!"

Hiroshi glanced at Daisuke. "I don't like the sound of this at all."

-------------------------------------------------------

Shampoo ignored the small crowd that had gathered. The charge read full, and as there were a lot of new parts on it, this was almost a maiden flight.

Electric engines came online. Shampoo's grin faltered for a moment and she looked uncertainly at Ranma.

"I added a noise suppression system." Ranma thought the neighbors would appreciate it. He turned back to the task of putting his workshop underground where passing eyes couldn't see it.

The easiest method was the method he had chosen. Two little reprogrammable workbots (about the size of a five gallon jug) were outfitted with digger arms and sent down to a distance of 900 feet. They would excavate the area, seal it, then begin work on the access tunnel.

Shampoo blinked as her airen turned away from her, knowing from his reaction to her earlier hug that the vision of the mind-controlled amazon that had hurt him continued to haunt him. The rest of her smile left her face until she forced one back into place.

Shampoo turned her attention back to the little cycle and shot it up to the maximum height.

She waited until the "shaky" feeling caused by the hoverjets losing purchase passed, then dropped twenty feet. Bleeding power to the rear jet, Shampoo shot forward.

Shampoo's grin returned as she leaned underneath the windshield. One hundred feet up, and travelling at a little over two hundred miles per hour, Shampoo was enjoying herself quite thoroughly. Wind whipping through her hair, it was easy for Shampoo to picture herself as some hightech valkyrie. Or perhaps some princess out to survey her early morning domain.

An Amazon on her hovercycle. What could be more natural?

----------------------------------------

Alarm klaxons began screeching.

"Alert, alert, alert! Unidentified aircraft approaching! All defensive systems ENGAGE!"

Lady Akiko stepped from the elevator and looked around her control room. "What is the meaning of this? Get me a visual!"

A large viewscreen flicked and showed a purple-haired girl in a Chinese pantsuit on some sort of jetcycle.

"So..." Akiko Mishima clenched a fist and stared at the screen. "He DARES?!"

"Lady Akiko?"

"He not only has that cat android, but he's made ANOTHER ONE?!"

"Lady, I don't think..." The technician trailed off as her boss glared daggers at the little supporting character that was daring to correct her. "Never mind."

"Ahem. Arisa! Ready Poison One!"

"Arisa still has the, ah, you-know."

Lady Akiko stopped. Arisa couldn't do much if she couldn't leave the bathroom for more than a few minutes. "Back up pilots, go!"

"Uhm, ma'am? You laid off the backup pilots last week."

------------------------------------

Shampoo swooped in, landing her hoverbike neatly in the tight space between the outer wall and the massive workshop. She had to get ready for school, after all.

"C'mon, we've got to get to school early. You don't want to be late to your first day, do you?" Nabiki chided from the veranda.

"Airen go school too? Shampoo get to sit next to him all day, is good!"

"You're not the only one going to school," Akane told her colleague. "And he's not YOUR airen."

"Akane? You're actually anxious to go to school today?" Nabiki raised an eyebrow.

"Of course," Akane's gaze was flat and unreadable. "If I understood English, I could go visit Ken. I'm sure this is all just some misunderstanding."

"Yeah, right."

Shampoo and Vanilla exchanged a look, Shampoo grinning. One less competitor.

---------------------------------------

Kasumi took a moment to look over her iinazuke/little brother. Tall, leanly muscular, with eyes that seemed to glitter unnaturally, his long hair tied back in a pony tail.

His dragon nature seemed to have leaked slightly over into his uncursed form. What she could tell from the brief hug she'd given him was that his body felt almost like it was sculpted from rock or wood. There had been a feeling of smooth hardness about him.

She also noted that he had seemed embarrassed and couldn't quite bring himself to hug back. Which had proved the point she had wanted to determine. Unfamiliar with any sort of physical affection.

The dragon nature was most visible in his eyes, the enlarged canine teeth, and the slight point to his ears.

His eyes. Kasumi's attention kept coming back to that feature. The old line about the hypnotic gaze of serpents played in her mind. Certainly his eyes seemed to draw one in. Kasumi chewed on her lip as she thought about those eyes.

Once this morning, those eyes had caught her. Just for a moment, but she'd felt all her skills and training and iron control desert her in that moment. She'd wanted...well, she wasn't quite sure what she'd wanted.

Shrugging, Kasumi tried to turn her attention back to the study guide. She was finding it surprisingly difficult.

--------------------------------------

Nabiki, Ukyou, Akane, Ranma, Shampoo, and Vanilla were walking to school when the crowd of boys came into view.

"What the heck?" Ranma stopped.

"It's a bunch of boys who are fighting us to get the privledge of dating us," Nabiki said drily, not mentioning that they were STILL just going after Akane and Ukyou. This really really rankled Nabiki.

"They study Amazon Law?" Vanilla blinked and studied the group with a cool expression.

"Shampoo just got uniform now has to get it dirty fighting stupid boys who wants date Amazon womans?"

"This is MY fight. Stay OUT of it." Akane growled as she looked over the crowd.

"Be my guest, Akane, I know that I'M not looking forward to this crap." Ukyou drew her spatula.

"Can no do, Akane. They is outsider males. Nabiki is Amazon, therefore Akane is sister to Clan sister. They challenge you, but is not one on one. Some have weapon. Shampoo is effectively War Leader for this group. Vanilla is Champion. Ukyou has shared blood and salt with Shampoo, is sister to Shampoo."

Nabiki shrugged. "She's got a point there, Akane. If they want to do one-on-one formal challenges, that's a different matter."

"We does special attacks on count of five, clear a path?"

"My flour bombs and exploding tempura flakes don't have that kinda range."

Shampoo glanced at Ukyou, noted Vanilla's shrug and Nabiki shaking her head. "No chi attacks? Shampoo have to take couple of days give sisters very special training."

Ranma shrugged, reached into a pocket and drew a small device out of his pocket. "I could send a sonic beam through the center of them."

"Not use hightech stuff yet, airen. Right now is just melee fighting, simple weapons. Akane? One, two, three."

"HA DO KEN!" Akane's chi fireball left a black streak in the ground underneath as it raced towards the crowd.

Shampoo summoned her own chi into the devastating manuever she'd learned on that one world. "FLAME ARROW!"(1)

The five watched as a path was cleared, mainly by people scrambling to get out of the way of the two attacks.

As they did so, five other figures stepped forward.

"Power armor?" Ranma and Shampoo exclaimed with slightly more interest.

"BWAHAHAHA!" Kuno stood in front of the mecha, bokken raised high. "It is beneath the dignity of a true samurai to use such methods, but then, that is what lackeys are for!"

One of the power armors turned to another. "I dunno, lackey just doesn't do it for me..."

Another power held up a gunhand. "Well, I prefer it to 'flunky' myself, but it does seem to lack a certain dignity."

"Silence, peasants!" Kuno snarled at his troops. "Now, my dears, I shall at last..." Kuno's voice trailed off as something penetrated.

The five continued to walk forward, Ranma and Shampoo mainly paying attention to the power armor.

"Steam powered power armor? Look, they're on extension cords!" Ranma snickered at such an obvious target.

Vanilla twitched. There was something very disturbing about this. An image of a huge tacky orange and white robot on an extension cord flashed across her consciousness, making her wonder where THAT had come from.

"Daisuke, use your rifle. THAT one. FIRE!"

Daisuke's power armor shot a high powered stream of water, completely drenching the group.

Akane's glare was murderous as the rhino stepped forward, having been caught unprepared for the wave of water. Ukyou was sufficiently startled that wings popped out of her back. Nabiki, Shampoo, and Vanilla merely got wet.

"Oh no, look at my clothes," Ranma-chan whimpered. "And I wanted to make a good impression today, too."

"PONY TAILED GIRL!" Kuno started forward. He was interrupted as a small, but quite muscular, rhino slammed into him. A moment later, carried by the force of the charge, Tatewaki Kuno was imbedded in the wall.

"Hurmf!" The rhino snorted and looked quite miserably at the group.

"Hot water!" Ukyou exclaimed.

"Uhm," Daisuke said in his power armor. "Pardon me, but..."

Vanilla and Nabiki quite calmly went around and turned off all the portable generators. Nodding to each other, they walked past the now inert powerarmor and into the school.

-----------------------------------------------

"Battle of Hastings." "375.12" "Shakespeare, at least by most sources. Some feel it was Francis Bacon and plagarized." "Ieyasu, who wasn't nearly that nice in person." "Nobunaga, who wasn't nearly that nasty in person." "1875." Ranma looked bored.

Mister Matsudeira was playing "stump the new student." He'd quickly been able to eliminate both Shampoo and Vanilla, and had smirked as the two girls' educational shortcomings were exposed. Shampoo had been embarrassed. Vanilla had simply blinked.

This Ranma Saotome on the other hand...

"Thulium after 2250, Gold from ancient times until stable extraterrestrial contact."

"Please restrict yourself from these flights of imagination, Mister Saotome. Gold was the correct answer." Matsudeira pushed his glasses back up on his nose. "Well, Mister Saotome, if you're so smart, solve this!"

"I thought this was English class," said Akane to her neighbor Ukyou.

Matsudeira finished writing the equation out, covering both blackboards in a long formula. "Well, wise guy?"

"Teacher?"

Matsudeira looked smugly at the student. "Yes, Mister Saotome?"

"Is that a dot there between the three and the nine?"

Matsudeira turned, frowned, and erased the errant chalk mark.

"Really, teacher, this is too simple." Ranma snorted. "Look, it's a textbook example of trying to find a Unified Field Theory. This is mathematical proof of a more than a four dimensional world. Using these equations you come up with the answer of fifteen. Of course, that's wrong, but that's where this goes, now if you want it corrected..."

Matsudeira turned, glanced at the book on quantum theory he'd copied it from, and stared for a few heartbeats. "Saotome, go stand in the hall," his voice was a ragged whisper. (2)

"Teacher?"

"GO STAND IN THE HALL!" Matsudeira's eyes were getting a little wild looking. "The rest of the class, turn to page 45 of the textbooks..."

-----------------------------------------

"Hiroshi?"

"Yes, Daisuke?"

"Any luck?"

"I think I may have moved an inch."

"It'll take us all day to get the power turned back on at this rate."

"How do I get myself into these things?"

"Because you've got the hots for Akane, Gosunkugi. That's why. Me, I'm here because of that show of 'solidarity' the girls did. Nobody dates anyone until this Akane & Ukyou thing is resolved."

"Thank goodness the air vents work."

Everyone murmurred agreement to Sanjuro's statement.

"Still," Hiroshi said a moment later. "It went better than I thought it would."

There was a brief silence. "Damn, I've got an itch."

"Maybe we should call for help?"

"With the echoes in this thing? No way."

Another pause.

"Damn pigeons," swore Daisuke.

----------------------------------------------

"Fi-fi-FIANCE E!"

Kuno stood up at his desk, his eyes wild.

"Yeah, your pony tailed goddess, Akane, Ukyou, (myself, not like you or anyone else around here seems to notice (grumble, complain, grumble)) and those two other girls you saw this morning. All engaged to be married."

The thought to occur at that moment to Kuno was that whoever the scoundrel, that should be HIM! He could just picture himself, surrounded by loving wives.

A piece of chalk bounced off Kuno's forehead. "Kuno, go stand in the hall!"

"Yes sir," Kuno's voice was distracted as he considered doing this and that, and having this and that done to him. Why he had to go find the parents and convince them that these engagements should be switched to him.

For was he not Tatewaki Kuno, a true samurai!

===========================================

(1) It just looks like a Kamehameha. So does the Hadoken. At the time that Goku first learned the manuever, he could just break brick walls with it, and even then not very thick ones. (Pilaf's tower held him quite well until the full moon came up.) So don't expect these people to blow mountains apart with the manuever. Maybe in "Fist Of Orion"- not here. (2) Petty, off on a power trip, has his own agenda that doesn't actually involve education. Didn't we all have teachers like this?

Series that have been crossed over so far in A Very Scary Bet: (this is an eclectic series where craziness is supposed to abound, after all) DOCTOR WHO: (UK) live action series about a time travelling alien with good intentions and the desire to meddle. RANMA 1/2: (J) anime about a martial artist teenage boy, his strange Chinese curse, and the even stranger people around him. SAILOR MOON: (J) sentai anime series about reincarnated female warriors out to save the world from recurrent evil. TENCHI MUYO: (J) anime about a young boy priest/martial artist related to extraterrestrial royalty and the strange (often alien) people around him. CATGIRL NUKUNUKU: (J) anime about a girl who's actually a high powered android with the brain of a cat providing the emotional and reactive portions of the mind. HOKUTO NO KEN: (J) angst filled anime about high powered martial artists and the consequence of duty unfulfilled. EVANGELION: (J) anime based on Revelations as seen through the X-files. RIFTS (US): a game setting/mileau of a future world where magic has awakened, the dimensional barriers frequently fail, and hitech and magic are used by all the various sides of a whole lotta conflicts. i typically keep a set of the books near the fanfic pile for people to read during Metroanime meetings when we're showing something that they might have already seen. POKEMON (US): aka "Pocket Monsters". None of the basics really appear, but Ryouga's got some serious problems coming with him having fallen in "Spring of Drowned Pikachu."

Planned: CUTEY HONEY: (J) series dealing with an android girl, this one a bit different from NukuNuku. She fights an ancient recurrent evil, just like Sailor Moon does. DEVILMAN: (J) anime series dealing with a boy who takes on the power of a demon in order to fight demons. Akira Fudoh shows up after volume 2 of the OAV to join the Senshi and Cutey in fighting what turns out to be a common enemy. OH MY GODDESS: (J) anime series dealing with the goddesses Belldandy, Urd, and Skuld and the love affair between Belldandy and Keiichi (a mortal engineering student.) EL HAZARD: (J) anime series dealing with an ancient world. One of the Ifurita series androids joins the cast from this side trip, to the horror of many of the rest of the cast. THE MOUSE THAT ROARED: (?) it's been years since i've seen it, but there is a planned use for the Grand Duchy Of Fenwick. DARKSTALKERS: (J) at least two of the characters are gonna turn out to come into this mess. One, Dimitri, is going to be one of Beryl's competitors. With him on the side of the bad guys, and after several of the girls, how can Frank or Talbain NOT show up? Talbain and the Senshi. Hmmmm.

Fist of Orion is comparitively tame, crossover wise.